01x19 - Still Changing

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Still Standing". Aired: September 30, 2002 - March 8, 2006.*
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Bill and Judy Miller are a blue-collar Chicago couple trying to raise three children responsibly without sacrificing their youthfulness.
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01x19 - Still Changing

Post by bunniefuu »

morning honey all right thought we were

out of cereal we are these are free

samples we got in the mail we have three

free samples we and two of our neighbors

did you oh the mail came I'm supposed to

get my report card and I want to suit my

class rank is so old school already

knows your rank major losers sorry Brian

no report card up to the parents of

Lauren Miller it looks like it's from

your school oh I'll take that haha so

anything you want else before we open

this Lawrence I love you taught your

report card you wasted and I love you

invitation to your clarinet recital this

is great you've worked really hard on

learning an instrument and we are very

proud of you you should be i hate it ah

you wasted and we're proud of you I'm

not good at the clarinet I see no reason

to humiliate myself in a recital not

when there's plenty of spelling bees and

science fairs to do it for you okay

school dances hey everyone hey Karl

what's up I got three words for you

Weezer's back in four words town 56 this

weekend Jesus back yes Weaver your

father's crazy friend that he's known

since high school who would the all-city

track me ran the hurdles wearing nothing

but a headband and he won the race by

that much whatever your father and

weezer would get together they would act

like total jackasses that's right kids

total jackass get this he wants us to

meet his wife Wow who snagged the wii's

the bigger question is who'd wanna marry

and we didn't win the race by that much

it's gonna be great we can go to big

al's and later the boys can go rip up

the town while my ladies go home and get

the bail money ready I'll be going with

the guys right you know kids your old

man may be a very cool guy but news

flash k*ller Miller wasn't born this way

the wii's taught me everything I know oh

here comes to old folks talking about

how they used to be cool say what you

want at least we weren't doing this

[Applause]

[Music]

weezer's gonna be so psyched to be back

at Big Al's and this place takes me back

me too remember we brought our dates

here after senior prom you were here

with Judy I was your Jenny oh yeah how

is Jenny great she just had a baby I'm

an uncle I just saw a booth really yeah

look still see where your curve Judy is

excelente ah man remember I always used

to say excelente I should bring that

back excelente excelente oh my god i

went to the prom with my sister well I

know what I'm getting two Italian beefs

with hot pepper some onion rings oh

maybe some chili oh I know what I'm

getting the side of the bed by the

window hey guys how's it going pretty

good will you it's me Wesley look sorry

god you're skinny and clean and sober

you're not a stripper actually Carl this

is my wife oh you must be miss Ouiser do

we it's Sarah dr. Sarah Cunningham it's

nice to meet you it's nice to meet you

too what brings you two to Chicago oh

well Sarah's here for psychology

conference thought I just tagged along

I'm presenting a paper on left brain

right brain cognitive theory to the

American Psychological Association

excelente so then we bicycle doll over

Provence for honeymoon have you ever

been different no but i have seen lady's

Underpants

I want to go to France sal wees did you

ever fulfill your high school dream of

being naked in every county in Illinois

well since I become a teacher I've had

to cut down on my public nudity that's a

shame that might be for excuse me I have

to go return this call I'll go with

y'all home check again oh you kids what

we did when we left the house keep your

fingers crossed isn't Sarah great yeah

she's fine so what do you say after this

we ditched the chicks and drink till we

stink how did you not become a song

right no no it's working a big day

tomorrow should probably just go back to

the hotel all right I what's going on

here are you talking about where's

Weiser the fungi the guy that taught me

everything I know blacked out woke up

woke me up and taught me everything I

know again a long time ago bill I mean

we all change we get married I mean

you've changed I am not changed oh yeah

didn't you save a mustache when you were

single yeah whatever happened to that

bill you used to get freed races you

look just like Ditka decided to shave it

for my wedding day funny I remember Judy

telling you to get rid of it she cast

her vote yeah but then I did when I was

already attending to do because nobody

tells k*ller Miller what to do come on

Judy tells you what to eat when to go to

bed and when to get up in the mornings a

load of crap they'll quit eatin those

onion rings you'll never get to sleep

you got to get up early tomorrow

you know I wasn't really looking forward

to going out with weezer but it wasn't

that bad nice to see that he's grown up

made something of himself yeah he made

something to me to board Oh bill please

the guy got married that song yeah to

dr. Sarah she opened his head took out

all the weezer and let the guy who

ordered the Caesar salad dressing on the

side change bill to settle down wasn't

supposed to happen the weezer he was the

one person who could make me feel like

it was still 1985 a big deal so you

didn't get to go out and drink all night

long you would have fallen asleep anyway

no I wouldn't have because I'm still

k*ller Miller yeah besides I took a nap

this afternoon like you told me to so oh

my god i could not like it told me to

know the guys were right you have

changed me just like Sarah changed

weezer you took k*ller Miller and

changed him into the picture perfect

husband that stands before you today

well your fly is down and you got some

chili in your hair oh I suppose you want

me to zip up and wash up no maybe it did

change but don't blame me I mean if

you're gonna be a responsible parent you

can't go out drinking all night like we

used to I'm not talking about that I'm

talking about the things that I didn't

have to change like my mustache and my

man for you know the room with all my

stuff in it that you made me give up

because we needed a bedroom for our

children who we love yeah we love him

look bill I know you think weezer's wife

changed him but I am NOT one of those

wives who wants to change your husband

oh no it doesn't seem like it but you

work slowly like the waves of the ocean

each year there's less and less bill on

the beach then why does it take more and

more suntan lotion

in this pond me and my son hanging out

getting out the stereo jam into some old

tools let me guess you couldn't remember

how to put this stereo together no but

there's a lot of the 80s I don't

remember Brian why are you setting all

this stuff up done you I'm bringing back

my man fort what's a man fort it's a

place where a man can fortify his

manhood in a pike environment when you

young your life is nothing but fun you

know what I mean yeah actually you know

last week in man club let me put it

another way I was young my life was fun

and that I don't know what happened your

mother but now I'm i'm bringing the fun

back

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]

what could be more fun listening to old

scratchy music and in room that smells

like old wet clothes oh yeah I'm still

airing out the old jams you're not

careful one day you'll wake up and

everything's routine your whole life's

predictable was no spontaneity you look

in the mirror and you're a different guy

so you're saying changes back absolutely

Brian it's a scientific fact there's a

client which is if the change is good if

we never brew and evolves we wouldn't be

walking upright so great about up right

here what are you guys doing leaving Sam

my dear resurrected the old man for you

bet I did Oh bill cigars you said you

weren't one of those wives I'm not I

think it's great not great Judy

excellent a k*ller Miller is back yeah

how many cartoon Tigers did you have to

k*ll to make those pants you used to

think they were cool yeah they were cool

when they were under black light and I

was stoned oh I almost forgot my black

light need help there k*ller

[Music]

gee kind of broken again Oh Lauren

you're practicing get good isn't she

getting good Linda yeah really good good

yes you suck Brian I can't believe

you're studying with all that noise

going on out there Ryan oh my god she's

still playing all right mom I will pay

for the rest of her lessons if you just

let her quit oh yeah were you going to

get that kind of money I'm sure the

neighbors will pitch in dance class day

another power ballad from the eighth

yeah create a service decade I'd like to

forget that and annoy me well wish me

luck going

p

[Music]

come on Judy do you think journeys wife

tells him to turn it down all journeys a

group they could all still have the same

wife though Judy I'll never turn it down

because I still rock call no wait wait

is comfortable can't believe he hasn't

given this off-key x1 is he gonna get

off this whole kick of how I changed him

you did change him of course I changed

him I think I would have put up with 16

years of Spicoli down there why don't

you just tell him it's driving you crazy

because if I admit that I change him

that I won't be able to change him again

and quite frankly I'm not done not like

he didn't change you what are you

talking about he didn't change me

remember used to have that blonde stripe

down your hair and made you change that

oh yeah my skunk air I look good in my

skull cake helps attract the biggest one

in the forest just saying you make

compromises to you know what you are

right man she's playing again and I

can't find my Walkman and he never will

all right don't tell me where my Walkman

is I'm tearing the hand off your Suzy

doll sorry

they're not the dead wood buddy

stimulating the follicles no I'm not

feeling pretty good about the old bills

that's treating you like a breath of

fresh air I'm thinkin you're having so

much fun going back to all the things

you used to do and i realized that i

gave up some things too hey I didn't

make you said I guess you wouldn't mind

if I went back to doing some of the

things I used to do course not i'm not

about to tell you what you can and can't

do great old friend is stopping by o

friend yes um when I lost touch with

then you remember her sandy Smokey Joe

didn't yeah I can't remember why I lost

touch with her oh wait it's because you

didn't want me hanging out with her

anymore but that's all in the past

because you don't want to tell me what I

can and can't do oh please tell me that

obnoxious horrible sandy hartwick is not

on the other side of that door standing

open its door tell me Scott side with

you I'm just kidding you hey doing

serious oh sandy you look great you look

like you have three kids whoa you look

like you're expecting the fort nice

pants Shazam hello sandy hey you guys

are not gonna believe this from the way

over here someone cut me off in traffic

and give me a cinder just worn it was

that crazy ol bull

[Music]

oh goody i forgot that nickname hey

stick around pimples ladies night out so

why are you going you can't make it juby

can I talk to you for a second please

don't leave me alone with her sorry

simple all right what's going on nothing

I'm just hanging out with an old friend

the friend I used to have fun with

before you changed me fun this woman has

never been good for you she's a bad

influence bill you never took the time

to get to know her she's actually a very

sweet woman yo Jude sick of hanging out

like you're blowing a sister it's only

been 10 seconds and I can hear you we

going out drinking or what I am there

tonight it's going to be excellent a

somewhat jealous cuts over here Jan

pimples would you please help in avoid

conflict I can give you a new nickname

all right five birthdays hi

[Music]

and are you sure you don't have any more

ass maybe you wouldn't feel so bad if

you hadn't gone bar hopping the night

before your daughter's big recital if

you don't shut up but you're here maybe

you should give up cigars no no I'm just

starting to like him if everyone will

please take a seat we'll start our

recital momentarily Judy yes you all

right yeah I'm fine oh I told you you

shouldn't gonna help with sandy last

night I don't know what you're trying to

prove welcome to our spring recital your

children have worked very hard so get

ready to enjoy some beautiful music

don't forget with my newest student

Lauren Miller playing minuet in G

[Applause]

[Music]

well it wasn't a bad recital Laurent you

should be very proud of what i stunk

Lauren just because your performance

wasn't perfect it's important to try I'm

quitting the clarinet that's probably

for the best okay Billy you know what my

head is pounding my teeth feel like

they're covered in moss I give up you do

whatever you want but I'm going back to

the person who I was yesterday all right

Judy I'll give up the cigars if you want

me to I'm not asking you to give up

cigars just say it now stop doing

something that means a lot to me please

oh stop smoking ostagar or or you'll

leave me yeah leave all right if you

insist I'll shave off the moustache too

but damn it woman i'm keeping my tiger

pants I will mean ah what's the word I'm

gonna go with skank dude your vertical

ready for a little hair of the dog sandy

the parts of last night that I remember

we're fun but I'm gonna take a pass for

tonight and forever oh man blows I don't

know what happened to you used to be fun

guess those days are over hey hey let me

tell you something my wife may have

gotten older maybe there are a few more

wrinkles and some things may have

migrated sack thank you what I'm trying

to say is even after all these years she

is still the wild troublemaking

hard-drinking piece of ass I fell in

love with a value my lady and that's how

I see Oh loves stick around just love

fest is bringing up my fajitas

so later buzz k*ll so Judy you know what

the best cure is for a hangover oh don't

tell me k*ller miller wants to have one

last fling on the old bean bag that up

is a hard on yourself you still got a

good couple of years in you Oh Eureka

cigar stink yeah go meister see it a

couple hours yeah okay

[Applause]
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