06x17 - Second Best

[bunniefuu]

(dramatic music)

- [Narrator] Robert Young,

and Jane Wyatt

with Elinor Donahue, Billy Gray, and Lauren Chapin

in Father Knows Best.

- Very good, Betty.

You say you got the seventh highest grade in the class.

- Well I had planned on being the highest.

- Well after all, being seventh

in a class of is pretty good.

- Pretty good is the story of my life.

I never come first in anything.

- Oh I don't know, you were the first one

born into this family.

(audience laughing)

b*at the other kids by a mile.

- Okay, but that's the last time I was first.

Look at my school record, I'm always second best.

Second best on the debating team,

fourth best on the tennis team,

played second lead in the operetta,

ranked th best in the scholarship.

- I'd say that's actually an enviable record.

Shows you have all-around ability.

- Which fits you very well for life.

- But what kind of life?

I'll probably marrythe sixth best husband,

have the eighth best children,

live in the th best house and drive the th best car.

- Well, if you can bank on that,

you'll be doing pretty well.

- It's just not good enough for me.

I'm getting sick of being a

jack of all nothing, an also-ran.

Someday, somewhere, at something,

and I don't care what it is, I'd like to be the best.

Numero uno, just once,

and if I were you, I wouldn't go around

mimicking a mediocre moron like me.

(phone ringing)

- Hello, yes she is, who's calling?

Just a minute.

- It's George Caster.

- Oh him, tell him I just left.

- I'm sorry, she just left.

- Betty, I'm ashamed of you.

- Oh, I know why he called.

To ask me for a date tomorrow night,

and I happen to know he'salready asked three other girls.

(phone ringing)

See, I'm even the fourthchoice on his list.

- Just a minute, it's your boyfriend Gordon.

- Oh, him I'll talk to.

Hello Gordie, no of course I haven't forgotten

this is our evening together.

Will your aunt be leaving at the same time as usual?

Good, but I want you to promise

not to chase me so much tonight.

- I won't chase you, I'mgonna disintegrate you.

(audience laughing)

- Here, let me talk now Gordon.

- Please bring some books over to read to me.

Okay, Auntie wants to talk now.

- Sorry to bother you Betty,

but Gordon insisted on calling.

He does so look forward to your evenings with him.

- Tell him I'll be on time.

Alright Mrs. Wickham, bye.

How'd I get trapped in this sitter job?

I did it one evening merely to help out,

now I'm on steady and I don't have the time.

- It can't last much longer, didn't you say

his parents would be sending for him soon?

- Yes, but how soon is soon?

They're still in India on some

kind of State Department work.

- That goofy Joyce, you know her?

She's trying out for thecollege fencing team.

- That's not so goofy.

She's a dancer, and theysay dancers can learn

to fence quicker than others.

And she'll have a good chance

'cause not many girls go out for it.

Hey, maybe that's for me too.

Maybe I can be the best in that.

- You?- Well, why not?

You may be looking at college's next fencing champ.

Ow. (audience laughing)

- I suppose I really shouldgive up my weekly club meeting.

- Oh no, you need that.

Don't worry about being late.

I have plenty of studying to do,

I can do it here as well as at home.

That is, if you don't get too frisky.

- Well, see you in a bit.

- [Betty] Alright, you have fun now.

- [Aunt] Alright, goodbye.

- Gordon? Gordon?

- You're disintegrated.

- You know something?

You're right, I'vedisintegrated into an also ran.

- You're the third one I've disintegrated today.

- It figures, with my record I couldn't

possibly be the first one.

Is this something you're making?

- You're not supposed to see that.

- Okay, first thing you better do is put on your pajamas.

- Read me first, is this for me?

- No, it's a history book for me.

- Is this for me?

- No, that's for me too, it shows you how to fence.

I'm gonna take that up.

- Fence?

- Fencing, you know dueling with swords?

- Oh, like Zorro?

- It's better than Zorro.

I'm gonna be champion fencer

at SpringfieldCollege, you know that?

- No. - Well, I am.

There's a tournament in about five weeks

and I'm going to win it.

- Read me how you do it.

- Alright, I don't know how yet.

I have to take instruction first.

I thought I better read up on it

so the instructor won't think I'm too dumb to learn.

- Read me how you do it.

- You know, the first thing you better do

is get your pajamas on.

- Read me first and then I will.

- No, now you go or I'll drop kick you

into the bedroom and you won't stop

bouncing 'till next Tuesday, now go.

(upbeat music)

(audience laughing)

- When performing a lunge, keep your foil arm

straight and shoulder high.

On the recovery, the left leg is quickly bent,

pulling the body back in position.

(upbeat music)

(yelling)

(audience laughing)

- Why you little Zorro.

(audience laughing)

- No, no turn the hand up in supination,

that is, palm up.

That's better, not so tightly.

There's an old saying, hold the sword

as though it were a little bird in your hand.

Firmly enough so that it cannot escape you,

not so firmly as to crush it.

- More like this?

- Ms. Anderson, I thought you said

you knew something about fencing.

- Well, I read a book on it.

- Must have skipped a few chapters.

(audience laughing)

Alright, the basis ofthe att*ck is the lunge.

In executing the lunge.

- Oh, I know the lunge, it's like this.

No?

- Ms. Anderson, why don't you go out

for the volleyball team?

(audience laughing)

- Volleyball? I want to learn to fence.

I intend to enter the tournament.

- Look, the tournament is only weeks away.

Now, if I had several months to train you.

- No use trying to discourage me.

I'm not only gonna enter the tournament,

I'm gonna win it.

Now, show me what to do.

- You're prettydetermined, aren't you?

- You bet I am.

- Alright, that's worth something.

But I warn you, you have a long way to go.

And you'll have to practice and practice and practice.

- Mom, save me, save me, the Three Musketeers are after me.

- Stop, or I'll make you practice with me.

- Now look, if this fencing

is gonna become an issue, maybe you better drop it.

It's not this important.

- Well, it is to me.

(arguing over each other)

- Well, you think of a way.

- Whatever you're doing, you'renot doing it in my kitchen.

- In the backyard, come on Bud, please.

- Let me get ready first.

- There's nothing to get ready.

- [Bud] Yes there is.

- Really now Betty, do you think this is worthwhile?

You have plenty to keep you busy

what with your schoolwork and your babysitting and all.

- Mother I have to prove to myself once and for all

that I can be the best at something.

I have to live with me the rest of my life;

I don't want to live with a second-rater.

- Yes, but merely winning a fencing tournament is hardly.

- [Bud] Okay, I'm ready.

(audience laughing)

- Keep your elbow down,keep your elbow down.

Riposte straight.

Cover in cart. Corner the cease,

cart, cease, cart cease.

Once more.

You see, you anticipate me.

Now please, corner the cease, cart cease.

Again, the riposte immediately when you find the blade.

That's better.

Not good, youunderstand, but better.

- You think I have a chance?

- I can't tell yet, but if determination

makes a champ, you're a shoo in.

- Then I'm a champ.

What do you think I need the most work on?

- Everything, your att*ck, your parry's, your feints.

And that riposte, don'tforget that riposte.

- Wow, you're sure encouraging.

- You asked.

- Me and my big mouth.

You think I might get some extra evening sessions?

Evenings, maybe?

- I'm willing to do anything to help

anyone who wants to learn.

How about this evening?

- Wonderful, I'll be here about.

Oh no, I can't, this ismy evening with Gordon.

- It's none of my business, but if I were you,

I'd give up boyfriends until after the tournament.

- Well, this one I can handle, he's fairly young.

- That's the worst kind.

- Six years old?

- Touche.

- And so Alice and her little brother Roy

packed their knapsacks and set out

on their big camping trip.

They'd gone less than a mile.

- What's camping?

- You know what camping is.

They'd gone less than a mile.

- What is it?

- You know, it's when you go up in the mountains

and you put up a tent and you cook outdoors.

You've slept in a tent, haven't you?

- Uh, uh, only in apartments and hotels.

(audience laughing)

- You mean you've never been camping?

- Uh, uh, no.

- That's a shame, everyboy should go camping.

That's the best part of his life.

They had gone less than a mile.

I'll tell you, some night we'll ask your aunt

to let you go home with me

and we'll put up a tent in the backyard.

And we'll cook our supper outdoors,

and sing songs around the campfire,

and have a wonderful time.

- Can we do it tonight?

- Oh, not tonight.

- Tomorrow night?

(audience laughing)

- No.- When?

- I don't know.

- Tuesday?

- Gordon, I don't know when, but we'll do it

some night, I promise.

- What if my daddycomes and takes me home

and then we can't do it?

- Look Gordon, I saidwe'd do it and we will.

But if you keep needling me, we'll just forget it.

They had gone less than a mile when Alice

spotted a beautiful. - Wednesday?

(audience laughing)

- You're a little monkey just like the guys in the story.

Bud, you don't want this old knapsack anymore, do you?

- I don't know, what doyou want to use it for?

- I want to give it to Gordon.

I trapped myself into saying

I'd take him camping some night in our backyard.

- Our backyard, that's no camping trip.

- Better than nothing.

Poor kid, he's lived in apartments and hotels all his life.

He doesn't even know what camping is.

Anyway, I'm stuck, I don't know

why I get myself into these things.

Such a bother.

- Such a bother she says, she loves every minute of it.

You'd think thatkid was her own.

- Say, did I tell you what the fencing coach said today?

- You need to take up volleyball again?

(audience laughing)

- No, he hasn't admittedI'm any good yet,

but he says he'd work with me on some

extra evening sessions.

- Extra sessions? - Yes.

- Oh now Betty, I think you're spending

too much time on this as it is.

- Mother I have to spend a lot of time if I expect to win.

- I'm afraid you're neglecting your schoolwork.

- No, I'm not.

- Well, you're losing weight.

- I am not. - Now.

- Well, maybe a little,but I need to lose some.

- Don't discourage her from extra work with the coach,

that'll let me out.

- Oh no, I still need you too.

- [Margaret] Dear.

- You know, Joyce isgoing out for the team,

but she's not going through all this extra jazz.

- She's not going to win either.

I've got to get some sleep, good night.

- You know, actually the victory

would do her a world of good.

Give her confidence in herself,

which I think is reallywhat she's looking for.

- Perhaps, but considering how much

she's banking on this,I wonder what'll happen

to her confidence if she doesn't win.

- I tell you this, the way she's going

after this thing, I think she's going to win.

- I certainly hope so.

- What's all that, a clothes drive?

- No, it's a hobo outfit.

I'm wearing it for the hard times party

I'm going to Saturday night.

(laughing)

- There you are, just in time for practice.

(talking over each other)

- I don't want to do this.

- Just be quiet.

- [Betty] You'll only be standing about five minutes.

- Okay, en garde.

(talking over each other)

(dramatic music)

(audience laughing)

- Oh Bud, you'renot even trying.

- You've got Gordon on the phone.

- [Betty] Tell him I haven't forgotten Mom.

- Are you alright?

- He wants to knowabout the camping trip?

- I wish I'd never mentioned it,

that's all he ever talks about now.

Tell him I'll explain it tonight.

Now listen, Gordon, I told you that I'm too busy now.

As soon as the tournament is over, then we'll go camping.

We have time forone short story,

but you know the rules.

No stories until you put on your pajamas.

- I can't get them on, I already packed.

- Then we'll just have to unpack you, turn around.

- Will there be any tigers on the camp?

- No tigers.

- Then we can get some.

- No, I'm afraid not, they're out of season now.

For goodness sakes, what's this, bananas?

- That's for a snack.

- Oh fine, we'll have mashed bananas.

What on earth is this?

- You can't see that yet, it isn't ready.

- Oh, something you made for your mommy and daddy?

- Maybe.

- Had any more letters from them?

- She's coming on a boat some week.

- Wonderful, now see if you can put them on

before I count , okay, now run.

One, two, two and a half.

(upbeat music)

- Touche, good Betty, very good.

- Think I'm ready for the big one tonight?

- You're ready, and how you've made

so much progress in such a short time, I don't know.

But you've done it.

This tournament tonightis strictly all yours.

That is, if you don't let down.

- Don't worry about that.

- You better head home,don't eat too heavily,

and get some rest.

You've been driving yourself, so you need to rest.

I'll see you back here tonight at : , okay?

- Okay.

(upbeat music)

- [Jim] Betty, hey champyou better wake up,

this is your big night.

It's after , you better start getting your things together.

- Oh my gosh yes, it'd be great

if I slept through the tournament.

Everything all ready?

- Yes, your mother has a bit of shopping

to do first, so we're gonna run ahead.

We'll see you at the gymlater, Bud'll bring you.

Kathy you coming with us?

- No, I think I'll ridewith the future champ.

- Thanks, but please don't jinx me

by calling me the champ yet.

I won't take the chance on anything going wrong tonight.

- Just don't get on the car for the champ,

I'll wait for you out back.

- Don't worry, I won't.

- Oh I wish you all theluck in the world dear.

I really want you to win.

- Oh, thanks.

- She will, come on we better hurry so we get good seats.

Mow 'em down tonight little girl.

- Don't be late.

- We'll be rooting for you, we'll see you over there.

- [Kathy] Is this everything you need?

- I think so, I hope so.

- [Kathy] I'll carry it.

- Get moving, I don't want to be.

(phone ringing)

Hello, oh hello Mrs. Wickham.

What? Oh no.

- Betty I do hate to bother you this way,

but you see we received this telegram

from his father.

They're arriving in New York,

so Gordon and I am flying out of here tomorrow to meet them.

So tonight's his last chance for that camping trip.

He does have hisheart set on it.

- Mrs. Wickham I can't do it tonight.

I have this tournament, and I.

I just can't do it.

Please make him understand.

- Oh, of course I will.

I didn't realize yourtournament was tonight.

I'll try to make him understand.

But perhaps you can droparound in the morning

for a moment before we leave.

Gordon has a little going away present for you.

- Yes, of course in the morning.

Yes, goodbye.

Oh, why did this have to happen?

I can't take Gordon camping tonight,

even if it is his only chance.

I've worked too hard for his.

- Don't argue with me, I'm on your side.

Come on, let's go, Kathy's got the stuff in the car.

- Poor little sweet mutt.

I suppose I should at least talk to him,

explain it myself.

(upbeat music)

- [Bud] And now we present a fencer

of outstanding ability,Ms. Betty Anderson.

- Thank you g*ng.

I shall now give you a demonstration

of my super technique in the art of fencing.

Watch closely.

(upbeat music)

(clapping)

(audience laughing)

(laughing)

Oh, an intruder, eh?

En garde, you rapscallion.

(audience laughing)

(upbeat music)

- Look, there she is.

What in the world is she doing?

Is that Bud in that outfit?

- No wonder she didn't show up for the tournament,

look who her audience is, Gordon.

(clapping)

(clapping)

- And now my friend, Colonel Baggypants

will lead us in our goodnight song. Colonel?

- Okay, yous kids, let's hear those

mellow tones ring out loud and clear.

* Good night campers

* Good night campers

* Good night campers

* We're going to bed right now

* Merrily we go to sleep

* Go to sleep, go to sleep

* Merrily we go to sleep

* And sleep the whole night through

- How'd this happen?

We couldn't figure out why you didn't show up at the gym.

- Your coach was verydisappointed, so was I.

- Well, I found out Gordon's leaving tomorrow.

This was his only night.

I tried desperately to brush him out of my mind.

Suddenly, I knew he was more important than the tournament.

Or even the winning.

(humming)

* Good night campers

* Good night campers

- I think you'd better take charge of your charge.

Looks like he's had it.

- He's asleep, isn't he cute?

We've got to get him to bed.

We've got to get this silly thing off first.

- [Jim] Here let me take him.

Where's he going to sleep?

- Look at this.

- [Kathy] What is it?

- I don't know, ashtrayI guess, but it says.

- [Jim] To Betty, my best friend.

- I wanted to be best at something, finally made it.

- You made it long ago with us.

- Just put him up in myroom in the other bed.

Just a second, let me take his hat, oh dear.

(upbeat music)