02x07 - Guy Town

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Big Mouth". Aired: September 29, 2017 - present.*
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02x07 - Guy Town

Post by bunniefuu »

Oh, my God. What is this?

We're protesting you, Andrew.

First you blammo'd on my floor
and then you blammo right out the door.

[Matthew] Tell us.

When exactly did you know
you were gonna dump Lola?

Was it before or after you came
in your Costco jeans?

The time line's unclear.

Oh, please. They were just
two horny kids getting their rocks off.

I don't see what the big deal is.

The big deal is he knew he didn't like her,

but he still chose to use her...

...to defile his denim dungarees.

Oh, sh*t. Is that what I did?

Nick, your friend sounds pretty gross.
- Look, Gina--

I'm not gonna hang out with a guy
who's best friends with a creep.

Does that mean
you do wanna hang out with a guy...

...who's not best friends with a creep?
- Maybe.

What're you doing this weekend?
- Nothing.

Well, you should maybe make plans,

'cause it's weird to be alone on a weekend.

Um, I'm gonna go to class now.
- All right.

Click click, bam!

Lock him up!

Jesse? You're protesting me too?

Well, if what Lola said is true,

and I tend to believe her
because I listen to women...

So do I!
- ...then you're a real slime bag, man.

Yeah, Andrew.
I'm honestly very disappointed.

I didn't think you were that kind of a man.

Oh, God.

Harmless dweeb or
disgusting sex monster?

You decide.

Disgusting sex monster!

[theme song plays]...

...♪ I'm going through changes ♪...

...♪ I'm going through changes ♪...

...♪ Oh, in my life ♪...

Rise and shine, Nickie.
- [groans]

It's time to macho move
Jesse's dad into Guy Town.

No ladies allowed except in our hearts.

Dad, it's too early for your enthusiasm.

Uh-oh! Mr. Teenager has his claws out.
[meows]...

...[chuckles softly] Please don't do that.

I'm just so jazzed
for our manly moving date.

Check this out.
- Is that a back brace for ladies?

'Cause that's for sure Rosie the Riveter.

Nobody messes with Rosie. She's tough.

Like spending time
with my mother-in-law. Ha-ha!

That's a man joke. I'm kidding.

I love Nana.

[groans]...

...[clattering]

Hello?

Duke, are you having
a ghost orgy in my closet again?

[screaming]
- Oh my God!

Hey there. Hey...
- [breathing heavily]...

It's okay, you can come out.
- You scared me.

I'm Tyler.
- Are you my new Hormone Monster?

I sure am, and you're my first kid.

You've never done this before?
- No way, Jose.

I'm a monster-in-training.
That's why I don't have my horn yet.

I don't get it until I'm certified.
- Oh!

So... what should we do first?

Well, I'm actually glad you're here.

There's this girl Gina I like,
and she just broke up with her boyfriend.

Okay, that's great. We're diving right in.

Girls are so cool.

Don't understand them.

But I love them.
- Uh-huh.

Know what you should do?
- What?

Get rose petals...
- Yeah?

...and make a trail from her locker...

...to the cafeteria...
- Okay.

...but then you're in the cafeteria
standing up on a lunch table...

...and then you do a cool dance...
- Cool dance?

...and then balloons drop from the ceiling,

and the balloon say 'Gina'!

Um... my first instinct is
that sounds kind of corny.

Dang! Stupid!

What about something else? Other ideas?
- Sure.

Okay, here's what you do.
- Okay.

You sneak up on her,
and you put your shirt over her head,

and she's blind, you scream, 'Gina!'

That seems like as*ault.
- Yep, it is.

Okay, reboot.
- Uh-huh.

Girls love to be saved.
- Do they?

So let's find
a nice remote set of train tracks--...

I'm gonna stop you right there, okay?
- God, I suck at this!

Tyler, you shitty tit-sucker.

You're never gonna get your horn.
Nick hates you!

I don't hate you.
- You don't?

No, not yet.

Good. We're friends again!
- Yeah.

Let me take a picture of your penis.
- What?

For my phone!
So when you call, I know it's you.

I don't understand
why they call it the bitch seat.

I got to rest my hands on the knees
of two men who I truly love.

Take your hand off my knee.

I really appreciate
you guys being here for me.

Look at his place!
It's like a daycare center for lonely men.

Why would anybody move into Guy Town?

Well, since Guy Bilzerian
is my divorce lawyer,

I get 200 bucks off the first month's rent.

Okay, that's enough for me.

Besides, this is what I deserve
for exposing Jesse to my edibles.

I'm trash.
- No. You are not trash.

You're just in the recycling bin,

waiting for life to turn you
into two-thirds of a coffee cup.

Oh, please! Recycling's a scam,

like stuffed crust pizza.

It's just more cheese and bread.

You're actually losing tomato sauce!

[Marty grunts]

Did you boys have fun back there?

No, not really.
- I had fun.

I threw up
in that Simplehuman garbage can.

Oh! That's no good,
'cause that's a nice ass trash can.

That's right, I'm back, you m*therf*ckers.

What's my life span?

It is unclear.

You're Maury, right?
- Yeah, no pictures.

I'm Tyler. I'm a huge fan.

Your work with Bret Michaels
was truly inspiring.

I know. Rock of Love was my idea.
- Really?

What's that you got there?
- It's a present for Nick.

I'm really good at drawing weapons,

so I drew him a sword
and I have a wicked crossbow!

Don't bring him presents.
That's weird, man.

Okay. Thanks for the advice.

God! I'm so excited.

I'm gonna make
this little boy's d*ck so hard!

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Hey, man.
That's not how we talk about these things.

Oh, sorry. Thank you. Yeah.

I'm gonna make
this little boy's penis so hard.

That's better.

I'm here in Guy Town,

the local hive of toxic masculinity.

Matthew? What are you doing here?

I'm exposé-ing you.

People wanna continue hating you,
and I'm gonna give them what they want.

I'm using my backpack as a dolly.

[Matthew] Defend yourself, pig.

Okay, yes.
I did give into my most primal urges,

but in my defense, who among us has not
excited their shaft for carnal relief?

I would appreciate--
- Cut!

Was that no good?
I was just being honest.

You were being creepy and weirdly formal,
Professor Pervert.

Indeed, Professor Pervert.

What are you teaching next semester?

Ogling 101? Jizz-a-nomatry?

Oh, please. You can't learn
Jizz-a-nomatry in a classroom.

You gotta get out in the field
and you know, jack off in a field.

Some scarecrow watching.

Oh, man, that dude's a f*cking weirdo.

What's up, jerks?
- Hey, Jay.

Get ready for your minds to end up
like my dad's d*ck on my mom's birthday:

Totally sucked off.
- Ugh!

I present to you... Guy Town!

Jay, this place is a total bummer.

Are you kidding me?

♪ There's a place I know
Where the dudes all go ♪...

...♪ Where there's no female
Scorn and hassle ♪...

...♪ It's a bachelor's dream ♪...

...♪ Every man is a king ♪...

...♪ Of his one room shag rug castle ♪...

...♪ We've got booze and
lube and Lexapro ♪...

...♪ We don't need the outside world ♪...

...♪ And sex position topiary garden ♪...

...♪ Where every bush is girl-on-girl ♪...

...♪ We're talking about Guy Town ♪...

...♪ It's a bachelor's stay-cation ♪...

...♪ Guy Town ♪...

...♪ A testosterone celebration ♪...

...♪ Guy Town ♪...

...♪ We're a lonely dude nation ♪...

...♪ Forget your woes
Embrace the bros ♪...

...♪ In Guy Town... ♪...

...♪ Oh, you can do as you please ♪...

...♪ Hang your balls in the breeze ♪...

...♪ Free of society's uptight gaze ♪...

...♪ In Guy Town ♪...

...♪ I lived here in 1971 ♪...

...♪ And saw more shaft
than Isaac Hayes ♪...

...♪ Shut your mouth ♪...

...♪ You can park and lounge
By the swimming pool ♪...

...♪ Don't mind the sheen
Of sweat and pubes ♪...

...♪ Just be careful of
the penis worms ♪...

...♪ And even we're all dudes ♪...

...♪ Because we're in Guy Town ♪...

...♪ A bro-topian sensation ♪...

...♪ Guy Town ♪...

...♪ A divorcee plantation ♪...

...♪ Guy Town ♪...

...♪ It's a player's coronation ♪...

...♪ Lose the ring and live the dream ♪...

...♪ In Guy Town ♪

Well, okay, fine.

The song is pretty catchy,
but this place is still gross.

Yeah. Did you see that Fleshlight
at the poker game?

If you didn't,
you should definitely rewind.

♪ Guy Town ♪...

...♪ It's the something
Something, something... ♪

Andrew... oh, this is
my new hormone monster, Tyler.

Hey! I like your mustache.

I bet you have lots of pubes.
Can I see them?

Hey, again, not the way we do things.

Andrew, will you be a dear
and refasten my locket?

Dad...
- Actually, the locket is for Greg.

Inside is a picture
of who he needs to love the most:

Himself.

Okay, if it's Greg's,
why are you wearing it?

To warm it up.
- What?

Boys, look at me.
You know when you put on a fresh locket,

and it's just too darn cold on your skin?

No, no idea.
- Dad, can we not talk about the locket?

Sure. What do you wanna talk about?
Other family members...

...who are having a tough time?
- What? No.

We're just talking about this girl Nick likes.

Andrew--
- He doesn't know how to get her.

Boys, a real man doesn't get a girl.

He woos her. Woo.

Maybe he's right.
I mean, he did get your mom,

and she's hot.
- Hey, rookie!

Don't talk about the mom stuff
in front of the kid.

But mommy titties are the softest.

Nickie, you have to tell her how you feel.

Be vulnerable and romantic.

[sighs deeply]

Gina, you make me feel
vulnerable and romantic.

Send.

She's gonna love it!

She's gonna hate it.

Why is she typing so slowly?

What did she say?
- 'Ha.'

Just says 'Ha.'
- Ooh! A single ha.

Yeah, that ain't laughing.

This unit has a k*ller layout.

The Jerk-off Nook has a view of the pool.

Are you boys moving in?

No, we're helping our dear friend Greg.

[gasps] I have that same kimono.

If this kimono could talk,
it would be nothing but bullshit.

You know, I had to stop wearing mine
because the silk was too rough.

You didn't have that problem?

Baby doll, with the amount of tanning
I've done, I feel nothing.

My tummy's like a wallet.

Can I borrow a 20?

Nick, I'm pretty sure
this guy thinks your dad is...

I can see what's happening.

A proud member of the LGBT.
- I get it!

Bye! Stop by if you need a cup of sugar.

Or tequila!

Well, what do we have here?

You must be the sad
old queen of Guy Town.

Ah! You must be
the catty little gay character.

I'm sorry, but I don't want a flyer
for your cabaret show.

I'm busy at noon on a Thursday.

Oh, that's quick.
Listen, baby Billy Eichner,

being young, gay, and mean
is not a personality.

Nick, I think we're witnessing a gay duel.

I've never seen anyone
talk to Matthew like this.

Uh, for your information, Martha Raye,

I'm more than young, gay, and mean.

Really? What else you got?

Uh... I happen to be investigating a boy
who jizzed in his pants.

Oh, honey, that's how I wasted my 20s.

Goodbye Peter Twink-lage.

[puffing]

Matthew, I don't think
that you're just gay and mean.

Who cares what you think,
you bag of burrata!

You know,
burrata is actually pretty expensive,

so I take that as a compliment.

I do it with tomato and peach.
No one's listening.

I'm listening. That sh*t sounds good.

Sweet and savory? Okay.

Argh! Nothing is up to code in here!

See that?
That's supposed to be a smoke detector.

♪ I'm a lady bass
With a belly full of eggs ♪

That's disgusting.

Also, is that a parody of a song
we're supposed to know?

Whoa! Greg gets a waterbed?

Cool, right? We also have water-cribs...

...if you're dumb enough
to get custody of your stupid baby.

[bones snapping]
- [groans] Oh boy!

I knew I was pushing it
with this box of blankets.

Big Nickie, help lower
your little daddy to the floor.

[groans]
- Gently! Your little daddy's delicate.

[Nick grunts]
- Ouch!

I think we should look away.
You know, out of respect.

But it seems like he's doing it
for our benefit?

[meows]

Why is there carpet in the kitchen?

You have any idea
the mold that could form?

What is this place?

What am I supposed to do?
Go out and find an apartment I like?

Get my credit checked?
Buy some furniture?

Stop waking up in the middle of the night
to smoke pot?

Yes, Greg!
That's what you're supposed to do.

It's called being a man.

Well, clearly I failed as a man.
- Argh!

Jay, can you take my lease up your dad?

[screams] Dammit!
And tell him we need a surge protector.

There are no outlets!

Just one extension cord that goes
all the way to the Chevron next door.

[grunts] My dad is such a wuss.

I wish he could be more like your dad.
- Oh! Cheap and angry?

No! Like a man.

Well, my dad is not a man.

He is a one-star Yelp review come to life.

All right, guys.
You better Yentl your tits,

'cause we're about to enter
the most macho place on Earth.

[Nick] Whoa!

This is like the nicest suite
at the worst hotel in Atlantic City.

Yeah, this blood smuggler
couldn't pay my dad,

so he gave him a f*ck-ton of marble.
It's super easy to hose down.

Jay! I need more ketchup.
- Nice! I'll get you some more packets.

Hey, Jay,
why is your dad eating a steak dinner...

...in an old fashioned barber chair?
- Jay, jack me up!

You got it, Dad!

Guy, your toilet's out of water again.

That's how I know
you're not sh1tting in there.

[giggling] Oh Guy, you're terrible.

Yeah, he really is.

Guys, this is my dad's
super-cool receptionist, Taffiny.

Oh! What happened to your wrist, sweetie?

[softly] Go on. Tell her.

Oh, nothing.

He dry-humped a girl and dumped her,
so she broke his wrist.

[laughs] Wow!
This kid humped and dumped.

Well, I came, and then went.

You're a little pimp, aren't you?
- Oh, I don't know. Maybe.

Uh, you know, some say I'm a creep.

f*ck that! You're just a 13-year-old man...

...who took what he wanted.

Ha!
- Like me. I live balls out,

and I give zero fucks.

That's pimp. Right, Taffiny?

That's what I'm talking about.

Let's live that pimp life.
Whoop! Whoop!

Is that what you are, Andrew?

A greasy little pimp?
- I don't know.

It does seem like a lot more fun
than being a creep.

And I got the whole outfit--
- At the Halloween store?

Yeah, the Halloween store.
- You know what, little stud?

You're coming to the players' ball tonight.

I'm making you Pimp of the Month.
- Mazel tov, baby.

Okay, yeah!
I'm the Pimp of the Month.

Give me the cash, b*tches.

Nick! Jay's Dad is a total stud muffin.

You should ask him about Gina.

Ha. That's actually not a bad idea.

Um... Mr. Bilzerian,

there's this girl at school who I really like,

but I don't know how to ask her out.
What do you think I should do?

That's simple.

You just need to remind her
that you're better than she is.

That seems mean.
- Yeah, mean guys f*ck.

Nice guys clean it up.
- [Tyler] Ew!

I don't wanna clean up
someone else's oopy-soup.

Ugh!

[Matthew] So Andrew, you're a pimp now.

How does that change things for you?

Well, if I had my druthers,

I'd invest in a bejeweled chalice...
- Fancy drink.

A shirt with a collar
that goes past my shoulders.

This m*therf*cker looks good.
- I may dabble in a little black voice,

I'm sure I'll pull back on that quick.
- That's what's up.

And I certainly won't be afraid
to strut my stuff.

Not scared of the strut!
- It's an equilibrium thing.

Oh, look at you.

You're wobbling around
like a newborn horse.

That's right. Newborn horse.

Big ass knees.
Wibble-dy wobble-dy.

Andrew, you're not a pimp!
Quit pretending to be one.

Maybe I wanna be a pimp!

I'm sick of feeling bad
about all the bad things that I do,

and I wanna forget them and be pimp.

That's right. Living that unexamined life!

Why do you have cassette tapes
of a band called 'Puh-Hish'?

It's Phish, Marty.
- Who cares! It's all clutter.

That's not clutter.
Those are memories.

Whoa!
- I know you think...

...because my vision's
bad I don't smell well,

but nothing could be further from the truth.

I'm sorry, who are you?
- I'm your new roommate, Leo.

Huh? I have a roommate?
- Couple ground rules.

I like to fall asleep to Frasier,

and the dishwasher, my friend,
is only for jewelry.

I know you.
You're Rabbi Poblart's adult son.

I heard about your failed wigs
for religious dogs business.

Uh-huh. Well, if you heard about it
from the dogs,

you're only getting one side of the story.

Okay. So what's the other side of the story?

This m*therf*cker's scary,
and he's Greg's roommate?

No. No, no, no.

Darkness ascends...

Mm-mmm. No, thank you.

Caleb, do you think
I'm just young, gay, and mean?

[Caleb] Yes.
- I'm a lot more than that.

I have a whole backstory
about how I used to live in Texas,

and I got bullied online.
They called me the steer q*eer.

[Caleb] Nobody wants to hear about that.
- Exactly!

They just want me to be sharp
and cutting, and funny.

[Caleb] Are you funny?
- Yes!

And stylish, and I'm a good person.

[Caleb] That is not
what others say about you.

Okay, turn off the camera.

Why won't Gina write back?
- I don't know.

Do you think my text was too mean?
- What did you say?

Well, Guy said I should be mean to her.
- Gotcha.

So I wrote,
'You want to do something tomorrow,'

and then, 'Oh sh*t,
that was meant for someone else.'

Ooh, yes!

That's pimp.
- That's what's up. Pimps and scrimps.

No boys, that's ew.
- Dad...

I hate to insult someone behind their back,

but Guy Bilzerian,
he's not the kind of man you wanna be.

What? No.
- He may look fancy from the outside,

but he's falling apart on the inside,
just like this building.

Uh, Dr. Birch,
you're sounding like a hater.

Haters gonna hate.
- I hate this hater!

Yeah, what do you know, Dad?

You gave me terrible advice about Gina,

and you can't even carry a couple
of blankets without hurting yourself.

Uh-oh! The claws are out again.
[meows]...

Stop doing that.
- [purring]...

Stop purring, Dad.
- Yeah, stop it!

Why can't you be more of a man
and not such a p*ssy?

[gasps, imitates cat wailing]

What does your pretty mommy
even see in him?

[phone chimes]
- She wrote back.

What did she say?
- She said, 'Ew.'

Titty-shits!
Now I'm never gonna get my horn.

So you're making this about you?

Yeah.

[Steve] DJ Pendejo,

coming at you live from the players' ball.

Scritchy-scitchy-scratch!

Coach Steve? Why are you at Guy Town?

I do my laundry here,
and in return, I DJ for free.

But I do accept tips.

Like how do you get people
to make eye contact with you?

So is this a monthly thing, or--

Time has lost all its meaning for me.
Soon it will for you, too.

Oh, no, I don't plan on staying here long.

That's what my last roommate said.
Then, he d*ed of penis worms.

They ate his flesh from the d*ck out.
- Whoa!

Ah! There you are!
Your father's very upset.

He won't even drink
the little saucer of milk I gave him.

How did I end up
with such a weirdo for a dad?

Look, your dad does a lot of stuff
that drives me crazy.

The kissing on the mouth.
He orders appetizers.

He asks me how I'm doing. Who cares? !
- But Mr. Glouberman, I'm just saying--

The point is, the man is smart
and he knows who he is,

which is more than you can say
for most people.

Yeah.
- Now if you'll excuse me,

I'm gonna go break down boxes,

which is my favorite thing to do.

Guy Townies,

ladies I found on the street in Trenton.

I want to introduce you
to the Pimp of the Month.

[man 1] All right!
- Pimp of the Month!

Jesus!

These sad men
keep getting younger and younger.

[chanting] Pimp of the Month!

Will you please tell us all
about your signature move,

the Cream and Shuffle.
- Cream and Shuffle?

Oh, what do you mean?
A hump and dump? Oh, okay.

Hello. So I was at this girl's condo...

What's the address?

Uh... Dad?
- Hey.

What are you doing here, jelly bean?

I wanted to surprise you.

Ugh! Who are these guys?

And what's Andrew doing?

So I don't like this girl at all,

but she wanted to rub fronts.
- [man 1] Rub fronts!

Yeah, this guy knows
what I'm talking about.

and I thought it would feel good,
you know?

So I did it anyway,

even though I knew that I didn't like her.

[man 2] Speak up!

And then I broke up with her.

And she cried,

and, uh... yeah,
now that I say it out loud,

I don't feel very good about it at all.
- [man 3] Whoo!

It's just, it's hard, man,

'cause I'm horny.

I'm horny all the time.

And I'm making bad choices,

but at the end of the day,

I'm not a pimp,

and I don't want to be one.

Boo! That sucked.

I knew he wasn't a pimp.

He's more of a john.
He will pay for sex in his lifetime.

I truly believe that.

Of course he will, and I shall be there.

Yeah, me too. Wanna carpool?

Dad, what is this place?

It's Guy Town.

And you must be Greg's ex. My, my.
- This is my daughter.

Your daughter's an eight
for the figure alone.

What the f*ck?
- Okay, that's it!

I might deserve this sh*thole,
but she doesn't.

Guy, I'm sorry,
but you gotta let me out of my lease.

[laughs]

Oh, Greg. No one leaves Guy Town.

[expl*si*n]
- [screams]...

Oh, sh*t!
- Is he okay?

He's not breathing. We need a doctor.

I've got a doctor...

Dre signed basketball
in the trunk of my car.

Just kidding. I wish.

What I do have is a nurse...

Jackie signed T-shirt.

Over here!

I'm a doctor.

[panting]...

...[meows]

My dad's kind of a badass.

Yeah, your little kitty daddy
is a tiger mommy.

[screaming]

Oh! Hello.

Everyone, he's going to be okay!

Dad! That was amazing.
You're like a hero.

I guess this p*ssy is pretty good
at meowth to meowth resuscitation.

Okay.
- Meowth.

Look, I don't care if I signed a lease.

I won't have
my daughter spend another minute...

...in this electrical deathtrap!

You listen to me, Bilzerian.

We'll get the city council
to shut this place down!

Good luck.
I've bribed half the city council,

and blackmailed the other half.

We just got you saying
all that Scooby-Doo stuff on tape.

It's not on tape. It's a memory card.

Give me that camera!

This camera belongs to the AV Club!

[Guy screams]

Oh, no! My hair!

No! Don't look!
Don't look at me! Look away!

Pimp of the Month.

[Guy] I think I can feel the penis worms
going up my d*ck hole.

I can feel them devouring my cock!

Hey, um...

...are you okay?

I just ordered a Hawaiian pizza
from Little Caesars.

What does that tell you?

[chuckles]

I'm sorry if I was rude before.

Yeah, well,
I probably owe you an apology, too.

I shouldn't be picking fights with little kids.

That's probably a good policy.

What can I say? I got issues.

And I guess I saw
a little bit of myself in you.

[stammers] I would never wear a kimono.

Okay, right there.
That's what I'm talking about.

You don't have to be
a little prick all the time.

You can let your guard down
once in awhile.

And what? Be nice?

Wouldn't k*ll ya.
You know, I wish I was a little nicer.

I might not have ended up here.

How did you end up in Guy Town?

You're in luck, kid.
I've written a one-man musical about it.

Sit down!

We open on Stonewall.

1969.

A minimal set.
- Oh, sh*t.

What's that now?
- I can't wait!

I need to be home in 17 minutes.

[Marty grunts]
- So kiddo, what's going on with Gina?

Uhh... I think I'm just gonna give up.
- Give up?

But you really like her.

Yeah, but I don't know how to ask her out.

That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

Just do what you like to do
and bring her along.

Well, I like go-karts.
- That's a terrible interest!

Nickie, why don't you invite Gina
to do go-karts?

[honks]
- Come on, Greg! Let's go!

What's your hurry? I don't even know
where I'm sleeping tonight.

I got three words for you:

Be my roommate
in the storage unit where I live,

which is on the diaper barge.

Greg.

This is Guy Town.

I originally came here to do a story
about a lumpy gourd of a boy,

but I ended up learning a few things
about what it means to be a man.

[Matthew] Sometimes being a man means
putting the people you love first,

and sometimes it means
owning up to your mistakes.

Go away, Andrew!

I just want to say that I'm sorry.

Get out of here and never come back,

like every single one
of my pageant coaches.

[Matthew]
Not all men value the same things,

and that means
you can be any man you want.

♪ Marsha P. Johnson
Threw the first brick ♪...

...♪ The pigs b*at the h*m*
With really big sticks ♪...

...[gasps] Oh!

Steve... hey.

Where is this diaper barge going?

To Diaper Island, of course.

Good night, Greg!

[Matthew] All you need to do
is figure out who you are,

and be true to yourself.
- [meows]...

I got a golf cart engine.
- Whatever! You're cheating!

Whoo! [laughs]
- [laughing]

Winner!

Yeah! We kicked buns!

Ooh, yeah!

What's happening?

[screaming]

Oh, my horn!

[Tyler groans]

Nobody warned me it
would hurt this much!

It feels like I'm being impaled
by my own spine!

[groaning]

Oh, God!

[panting]...

...[groaning continues]

No!

God! Jesus Christ! f*ck!

[breathing heavily]

It's cool!

Oh, my horn looks cool!
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