02x01 - Sparring with Death: First Chapter

[bunniefuu]

Matilda Stone
first experienced heartbreak

at the tender age
of three years,

three days, three hours,
and three minutes old...

...when her mother
mysteriously disappeared.

But her youth would
also bear witness

to the heartbreak
of her mother's three sisters.

Her Aunt Cat Stone
suffered prolonged heartbreak

due to the untimely death
of fellow band member

and soulmate, Nikki Holler.

Her Aunt Jane Stone
suffered instant heartbreak

when she was jilted
on her wedding day.

And her Aunt Beth Stone

suffered the inevitable heartbreak

of losing her husband
to a long-term illness.

For most, the notion of having
a heart of stone

means a person with a cold
or unfeeling nature.

But for Matilda,

to have a heart of stone
means to be someone

who, despite their own heart
being broken,

is still capable
of immense love.

It had been three months,
two weeks,

12 days, and 13 hours
since that fateful night

when Matilda Stone had missed
the opportunity of a blind date

with local GP Dr. Daniel Lynch.

Since that time, Matilda
has committed herself

to her policing career
with little thought of romance,

whereas Daniel has taken
the notions of commitment

and romance
to a whole new level.

Engagement? No!

Morning, Aunt Jane.

Morning, Matilda.

Have you seen the paper?

- I haven't seen anything.

What about the paper?

Well, um...
Well, the price has gone up.

I-It's a disgrace.

I agree.
It's totally unacceptable.

I think I might write
to our MP.

Mm.

You're all acting weird.

Why are you here anyway?
I thought you were staying

at the Wellness Retreat
for that article you're writing.

We're on our way there now.

Uh, we were just wondering
if we couldn't persuade Jane

to join us.

Yeah, come on, sis --
a bit of pampering,

bit of spa action,
you know you want to.

Strange people touching me?
I don't think so.

You two go. Have fun.

Bye.

Bye.

Now celebrating its 20th year,
the Wildemarsh Wellness Retreat

has long prospered
through its motto,

"Refecti, Requiem, Reparando."

Looking good!

"Rest, Recuperate,
Reinvigorate."

Okay, we'll end it there.

Although certain employees' ideas

about how to reinvigorate
its female clientele...

- Let me help you.
- Oh, thank you.

...are somewhat open
to interpretation.

Stephen Swift.

Physiotherapist and
chief fitness instructor.

Beth Stone.
And this is my sister Cat.

Ms. Stone, is it?

Sorry, what's your name again?

Stephen,
but you can call me Steve.

Well, I hate to break this
to you, Steve,

but that tree you're barking up,
it's the wrong one.

Stephen, take our guests' bags
to the Dolphin Room.

- But I was just --
- Straightaway, please.

I'll see you ladies later.

Not if we see you first.

Rowena Walker, general manager
and head of public relations.

And you must be --
don't tell me --

uh, Cat, former
Volcanic Youth guitarist

and award-winning
graphic novelist,

meaning you must be Beth,
best-selling author

and intrepid guest columnist
at the Wildemarsh Watchman.

You've done your homework.

If you'd like to follow me,

I've prepared a small tour
of the facilities.

Feel free to ask questions.

I want your article to be
an honest reflection

of your stay with us.

Not worried I'll write
something bad?

Ah, when you've been in P.R.
as long as I have,

you learn that all publicity
is good publicity.

But General Manager and Head of
Public Relations Rowena Walker

was soon to discover the phrase

"all publicity
is good publicity"

wasn't necessarily true.

Especially when it comes to m*rder.

Morning.
Morning.

Morning, sir.

Sergeant Stone,
have you seen today's paper?

I know, sir --
the price has gone up again.

My aunts are most upset.

Yes. Precisely. Shocking.

Was there anything else?

Yes, uh, another break-in
at Rachel's Papers.

Uh...

- Well, go on then, Stone.
Mm.

- And no hanging about.
- Mm-hmm.

Or reading the paper.

Sir.

So, as well as detox
and weight loss programs,

we also offer many
complimentary treatments

like, uh,
cognitive behavioral therapy.

And how did the retreat
come about?

Well, Dr. Isherwood founded
the retreat 20 years ago

after a successful career
in intensive care.

She wanted it to be a place
of calm where people can escape

from the outside world.
And off the record,

I think this place is as much
a retreat for Dr. Isherwood

as it is for our guests.

I heard she won the money to buy
this place in a poker game.

Oh, that's an unproven rumor.

And what about you?
How long have you been here?

From the very start.

I was Dr. Isherwood's
first employee.

Ah, Winnie.
The leak's in there.

Lord Overshaw's moving
to the Albatross Suite.

But I don't want to move.

Can't be helped, I'm afraid,
Lord Overshaw.

The leak behind the bath panel

means the entire bathroom
needs redecorating.

But I'm happy where I am.

Dr. Isherwood, can I introduce
you to our guests

from the Wildemarsh Watchman?

Yes, of course. Just one moment.

Let's discuss this matter

once you've settled into your
new room, Lord Overshaw.

Dr. Isherwood.

Pleased to meet you, uh...

Beth Stone and her sister Cat.

Apologies, Rowena did tell me,

but I have a memory
like a sieve.

Oh, I'm the same.

Anything new gets lost
in the shuffle.

- Yes, precisely.

Ooh!

Oh, Alistair,
what have you done now?

I'm trying to fix the leak.

Well, not very effectively,
by the looks of things.

I'm sorry, Angela.

I'm sure Alistair will
have it fixed in no time.

You'll have to excuse me,

I just have to have a quick
word with my brother.

Come along.

Could we possibly
not print that?

Thanks.

And this is where
you'll be staying.

Rowena, have you seen
my pass card?

No, no one's handed it in.

I swear I had it on me earlier.

Sorry, uh, Grace Mulberry,
lead therapist.

I specialize in acupuncture
if you have any aches or pains.

Dr. Isherwood's holding
a small presentation

about the retreat
for you at 6:00.

Alcohol-free, obviously.

I've asked key staff to attend
so you've plenty of time

to ask any questions
you need for your article

before the 10 o'clock curfew.

Curfew?

What curfew?

Dr. Isherwood's a great believer

in the regenerative
powers of sleep.

She insists we're all tucked up
in bed by 10:00.

- Oh.
- Come along, Grace.

I'll help you look
for that pass card.

Oh, anything you need, anything
at all, just let me know.

Nice meeting you.

Hm.

10 o'clock curfew?

Alcohol-free?

Did I not mention it?

It's the second time this month.

No money taken this time either?

Nope, just random bits of stock.

I figure it's kids
mucking about.

You might want to think about
installing a security camera.

Oh, dear, another break-in?

Kids these days.

Papers, Ms. Bryant?

Thank you, Rachel.

See you tomorrow.

Bryant?

Was her husband in the police?

Well, he might have been.
I'm not sure.

- Oh, excuse me.

DR.The
Rise and Shine Aqua Fit Workout

will commence
in seven minutes' time.

What color would you say
the pool was?

Azure?

Oh, cheer up. We're on holiday.

What, a salad-only menu, no
booze, and lights out at 10?

I'm not sure this counts
as a holiday.

Hi, ladies.
Can I offer you a --

Taylor, love?

Today's acupuncture
still hasn't eased my neck.

Be a star and book me in
for another session.

Yes, Ms. Hayes, right away.

Thanks, babe. Appreciate you.

- Uh --
- The Aqua Aerobic Class

is your opportunity
to nurture your water element.

Brat!

The one thing
Jane Stone disliked more

than casual fly posting...

You, off my window!

...was the casual use
of the English language.

"Irrigardless"?

If you're going to fly-post,
at least learn how to spell!

What, just chocolates?

127 bars, according
to the shop owner.

Sir, have you seen the paper
about Dr. Lynch's engage--

Sarge!
I didn't know you were back.

What was that about Dr. Lynch?

Nothing.

"Mr. and Mrs. Timothy
Young of the Grange, Wildemarsh,

are proud to announce the formal
engagement of their daughter,

Ms. Natasha Tatiana Young,
to Dr. Daniel Lynch."

Maybe we should get them a card.

Good idea.

Why don't you organize that,
Foster?

Sir.

And finally,

our patented Regal Jelly
Facial Mask Treatment,

made from bees raised
on our estate.

The treatment transforms
the skin,

relieves modern-day stresses,

and makes you look
and feel years younger.

The Wildemarsh
Wellness Retreat.

Requiem, Reparando, Refecti.

If I could have
everyone's attention.

As you all know, this year
we are celebrating

the retreat's 20th anniversary.

With this in mind, now seems
like an appropriate time for me

to start planning my succession.

I have decided to take a step
back from my duties

as retreat director.

I'll still be living on-site,
of course,

and I'll always be around
as a sounding board

should anyone need me,
but it means that the day-to-day

running of the place will be
in the hands of someone new.

Since we're all
gathered together,

I'd like to take
this opportunity

to announce my successor.

They are someone very special,

a loyal employee,

a real member of the family.

I am delighted to announce
that the next director

of the Wildemarsh
Wellness Retreat will be...

our very own lead therapist,
Grace Mulberry.

I'm sure you will all join me

in wishing Grace the very best
of good luck in her new role.

She made me promise
not to say anything.

- Hm!
- I need a proper drink.

Oh, someone's not happy.

He's not alone.

While Rowena Walker's
self-help books informed her

that other people's successes
weren't her failure,

she couldn't help but feel an
acute sense of disappointment.

A sentiment similarly shared

by a certain
detective sergeant.

Oh, Matilda, I didn't know
you were home.

How was your day?

Hm?

Oh, sorry. Um, quiet.

Chocolate theft
at Rachel's Papers.

That reminds me, do you remember
if Inspector Bryant's wife

was called Edith?

Who?

The officer in charge
of Mum's disappearance.

I can't say that I remember.
I tell you what --

why don't I make
your favorite, tuna pasta bake?

Oh, sorry, I've not got much
of an appetite tonight.

You remember that day you were
12 and I didn't get married?

Of course.

Well, looking back, I think what
happened then was for the best.

What I'm trying to say,
not very elegantly,

is that sometimes,

and quite a lot of the time,
actually,

things have a way
of working out.

Thanks, Aunt Jane.

As the clock struck 10,

everyone at the Wildemarsh
Wellness Retreat

was complying with
Dr. Isherwood's strict curfew.

Everyone, that is, except
Dr. Isherwood herself.

DR.
The 10 o'clock curfew

is about to begin.

Hello?!

Hello? Help me!
I can't get out!

Help! I can't get out!

Help!
Please help me!

Help me!

Help me.

Help me, please.

This is a bit naughty, isn't it?

Naughty's good for you.

Come on, spa's this way.

What about the curfew?

I haven't been to bed
before 10 o'clock

since I was at junior school.

Besides...

Where'd you get that?

Best you don't ask.

Ah, we'll have to drink it
out the bottle.

What's that?

Oh, God!

Ah!

Yes, I'll tell her now.

The head of the Wellness Retreat
has been steamed alive.

Dr. Isherwood
liked have the spa to herself.

She'd wait until
the 10 o'clock curfew

and spend half an hour
in the steam room.

You could set your clock by it.

And this was general knowledge?

By staff
and regular guests, yes.

I'm sorry, um...

Dr. Isherwood was like
a fairy godmother to me.

Melanie?

Natasha, what are you
doing here?

Oh, Mummy's treating me.

I have a pound and a half
to lose

before the engagement party.

Oh, Mummy, this is Melanie,

one of Daniel's little
work colleagues.

Matilda.

Natasha.

Daniel, darling!

Dr. Lynch.

Congratulations on your engagement.

Natasha thought it was time
we settled down.

Have you set a date?

Not yet, but we don't intend
leaving it too long.

Do we, darling, hmm?

- Shall we?
- Please.

It was nice to meet you,
Melanie.

Have you heard?
Terrible.

Did you see anything unusual
going on last night?

Me? No.

I was in bed by 8:00.

What took you so long?

I've been doing some
very interesting research

into steam generators.

Oh, sounds riveting.

What's she doing?

I can't see
'round the corner.

- Excuse me, wha--
- Oh!

Matilda, can I apologize?

What are your aunts
doing here, Stone?

They found the body, sir.

Your aunts should
carry a health warning.

"May seriously harm you
or others around you."

Victim?

Dr. Angela Isherwood.
55, single.

She owned the retreat.

Mattie.
- Cause of death?

Hyperthermia,
by the looks of it.

Mattie.

I found traces of red paint
on the door handle,

suggesting something may have
been used to prop it shut.

Coo-ee, Mattie!

Mattie!

She's not gonna stop
till she speaks to you, is she?

- Afraid not, sir.
- Go on.

This had better be important.

Jane's been researching
steam generators.

According to the installer
I spoke to,

it's almost impossible
for generators to overheat,

unless they have
been tampered with.

It's locked, sir.

Foster, break the door down.

Sir.

Stand back, everyone.

Get up, Foster.

Give me a minute.

Have you got a credit card?

Oh, it's the old
credit card in the --

....door trick.

That will pay for the damage.

What are you doing here?!
This is a crime scene!

Sir.

Looks like the safety valve
has been manually overridden.

And look.

Paint samples match.

Someone used this broom
to prop the steam room door shut

to prevent Dr. Isherwood
from escaping.

- Instigate a m*rder inquiry.
- Sir.

And if I hear even a whisper
that you three are meddling...

We promise
you won't hear a thing.

Excuse me, Inspector.

Yes?

I know you don't want us
involved,

but I have just spotted
something between those tubs.

It looks like a false nail.

Lemon Meringue Pie.
The color.

Same color that
self-obsessed brat had on

by the pool yesterday.

Did you catch her name?

- Yasmin Hayes?
- Yeah, what's going on?

Detective Sergeant Stone,
Marsh Valley Police.

- Detective Inspector Thorne.
- Check the bathroom.

Step aside, please.

Can you account for
your whereabouts

between 10:00 and 10:30
last night?

What's this about?

As I said, can you account
for your whereabouts

between 10:00 and 10:30
last night?

Look, I had a bottle
of "proscexio,"

feeling a little bit hungover,

and would kind of like you
to be out of my space.

I mean, you're not gonna
find anything,

so you might as well just leave.

Lemon Meringue Pie?

It's my shade.

Grace Mulberry's
missing pass card.

Look, this is ridiculous.

I'm calling my solicitor.

What have you done
with my phone?

Yasmin Hayes, I'm arresting you
on suspicion of the m*rder

of Dr. Angela Isherwood.

What?

Old Iron Britches is dead?

You're making a serious mistake.

You do not have to say anything,
but it may harm your defense

- if you do not mention --
- This is crazy.

I want my phone
and I want my solicitor.

You're gonna regret this,
I promise.

I was drinking
on the roof terrace all evening.

Don't be disappointed,
Sergeant.

Not all m*rder cases
are complex mysteries.

We may not have the motive yet,
but the facts are obvious.

- Ladies.

What -- What's going on?

My sister owns this place,
and I demand to know

what's going on, irregardless.

Maybe we should sit down,
Mr. Isherwood.

There's something
I need to tell you.

Are you thinking
what I'm thinking?

That everything's a little bit
too convenient.

Well, you heard
Inspector Thorne --

the facts are obvious.

But he's forgetting
Sherlock Homes.

Yes, there's nothing
more deceptive than an --

...obvious fact.

I've just heard the news.
I'm so sorry, Alistair.

Maybe we should close
the retreat out of respect.

Oh, we can't do that.

Why not?

Our finances have taken
a bit of a hit recently.

If we close, even temporarily,
it'll sink the place.

Dr. Isherwood would never
have wanted that.

Then we stay open for Angela.

Yeah.

DR.
Good morning.

The Wildemarsh Wellness Retreat
accepts no liability

for injury
or endangerment of health.

Matilda.

George.

I'm sorry I never called you
back after our date.

It's okay.

I just figured
you lost my number.

So I set this whole thing up
so I could see you again.

Arrest me.

George, you coming or not?

I'd better go.
Maybe see you again?

I'd like that.

The same lipstick shade
as Yasmin Hayes.

That proves she was out here,
just not when.

Oh, look, a desire path
leading to the woods.

A what?

It's an unintended path

caused as a consequence
of human footfall.

It was at times
like these that Cat Stone

decided her 14 months spent
living off the grid...

...hadn't been a waste of time
after all.

- Did it rain last night?
- A bit, about 9:00.

I remember thinking it's the
first rain we've had in weeks.

What time did Lord Overshaw
claim he went to bed?

Have you heard?
Terrible.

Did you see anything unusual
going on last night?

No, I was asleep by 8:00.

What? What don't I know?

Tell me!

Can you explain why we found

one of your false nails
in the maintenance room

and Grace Mulberry's pass card
in your bedroom?

Someone must have planted them.

I didn't k*ll anyone.

If anyone had beef
with Dr. Isherwood,

it's that ratchet Rowena Walker.

It's her you should
be interviewing.

What makes you say that?

Because after Dr. Isherwood
announced her successor,

I saw the two of them
having a blazing row.

This must be a shortcut
to Rachel's Papers.

Matilda attended a break-in
there yesterday.

- Chocolate theft.
- Ahh!

I told you, I was hiding
out on the roof terrace.

Cigarettes and alcohol
are prohibited.

Is there anyone who can
corroborate your whereabouts?

I've been through the belongings
of Dr. Isherwood's locker.

There's no sign
of her mobile phone.

Go back to the retreat,
take another look.

Make finding it a priority.

What part of hiding out
do you not understand?

Why stay at the retreat at all

if you're going to
smoke and drink?

I'm weak.

Sue me.

- Today, Foster.

Sir.

While a bitter Yasmin Hayes
continued her protestations

of innocence,
Beth, Cat, and Jane Stone

were soon to hear protestations
involving a far sweeter crime.

Target on the move.

Oh!

- Ohh.

I can explain.

Terry, we've been searching
for you all over.

Me?

Someone wants to speak
to a police officer.

My name is
Lord Reginald Overshaw

and I'm a choccyholic.

Is being a chocoholic
even a thing?

Giving up smoking is easier
than giving up chocolate.

Whenever the cravings
get too much,

I make a break for Wildemarsh.

I hang around outside Rachel's
Papers until the coast is clear

and then I break in and steal as
much chocolate as I can carry.

Why steal?

You're not poor.

Never marry outside your age,
my mother used to say.

She was a very wise woman.

My wife's the one who insists
I stay here.

She knows what I'm like.

Makes me hand over my wallet.

Well, I take it you plan
to compensate Rachel's Papers

for the trouble you've caused?

Yes, yes, of course,
of course, of course.

But that's not why
I'm telling you all this.

Last night, my cravings
were worse than ever.

My stash was out of bounds
in my old room.

So I made another visit
to Rachel's Papers.

Turned out to be a wasted
journey, as when I got there,

the owner was installing
a security camera.

Now, I'm no fan of Yasmin Hayes,

but I saw her drinking
on the roof terrace

both on my way to and on my way
back from Wildemarsh,

and the times match up with
when the k*ller struck.

Yasmin Hayes couldn't have
k*lled Dr. Isherwood.

I'm her alibi.

I'll need you to come
to the station

and tell Sergeant Stone
everything you just told me.

Yes, of course.

Ladies.

You coming, Cat?

Yeah, I'll be along
in a minute.

Released pending
further inquiries.

Sorry, sir.

Lord Overshaw was positive
about the times involved.

Adios.

- Oh, very nice.

Something odd about those
beginner's guides to poker

on Dr. Isherwood's
bookshelves, don't you think?

I wondered what it was
you'd seen.

I mean, if she did win the money
for this place in a poker game,

you'd think she'd be
finished with all that.

You used to play quite a bit,
didn't you?

Yeah, I used to.

I lost my shirt
around the tables.

Why do you think
I stopped playing?

Still, I'd love to know
how she won all that money.

I'm eating by myself tonight,
aren't I?

Yeah, don't wait up.

Despite never having considered
throwing a party

or undergoing unnecessary
cosmetic procedures,

Jane Stone became suddenly
curious about the possibilities

of doing both at the same time.

Meanwhile, after
an afternoon spent

visiting her old
gambling haunts,

Cat Stone's quest to uncover
exactly how Dr. Isherwood

won the money to buy
the Wildemarsh Wellness Retreat

led her to the door of the man

whose winning legacy
haunted her the most.

Cat Stone to see Lucky Jim.

Don't stare at me like that!

- Just give me my phone.
Calm down.

Calm down?! Who are you
to tell me to calm down?

Stop pointing all the time!
Give me my phone!

- I really -- I can't help you.
- Stephen, listen to me!

Right now!

What are you staring at,
grandma?

You haven't heard
the last of this.

Charming.

- Oh, she, uh...

...wanted a personal
training session.

But I-I'm busy.

Were you, um, heading through?

- Yes.
- Mind if I walk with you?

It's a free country.

As sole heir, I understand

Alistair's now going to be
taking over as retreat director.

It's only to be expected.

You don't mind?

It's probably for the best.

In truth, I don't think I was
ready for the responsibility.

Earlier, you said that
Dr. Isherwood

had been like
a fairy godmother to you.

What did you mean?

When I was 14,
I was in a car crash.

Um, my parents were k*lled,

and I ended up
in an intensive care unit

run by Dr. Isherwood.

It's how I ended up
in this thing.

I was in hospital for months.

Dr. Isherwood must have
taken a shine to me

because when I left,
she stayed in touch.

She even helped pay
for school trips

and driving lessons.

Is that how you came
to work here?

Dr. Isherwood was the one
who suggested

I train as a therapist.

And then when I graduated,
she gave me a job.

Grace, babe, I'm ready
for my acupuncture session.

Um, I-I thought
under the circumstances --

What?

Oh, Dr. Isherwood.

Yeah, I mean, it's all very sad,

but you know
I have to have my acupuncture

at the same time every day,

otherwise it plays havoc
with my circadian rhythms, so...

Do you need me
for anything else?

No, I've got everything I need
for the minute.

I'll meet you
in the treatment room.

Aw, thanks, babe.
You're an angel.

Come in.

I need to ask you
some questions.

Ow, careful.

I understand
you and Dr. Isherwood

were seen arguing
on the night of her death.

Ah, it was more of an exchange
of words than an argument.

And what was your exchange
of words about?

If you must know,
Dr. Isherwood always led me

to believe
that I was going to be the one

running the retreat
after she stepped down.

And you were angry because
she gave the job to Grace?

Well, it hurt to be
cast aside like that

after everything I've done,
but I swear, I had nothing to do

with Dr. Isherwood's death.

Is it me or is it hot in here?

Would you like me
to open a window?

Yeah, thanks, babe.

Where were you last night?

At home with Geoffrey
all evening.

And this Geoffrey
can confirm that?

Not unless you can
speak cat, no.

Terry?

I've had a call

- about Yasmin Hayes.

I asked her local police
to visit her house

to verify her address,
but the door was answered

by another woman
calling herself Yasmin Hayes.

Sorry,
say that again, Terry.

I can hardly hear.

The Yasmin Hayes we arrested
isn't who she says she is.

She's using a false name.

Hold on.
What's that noise?

- Treatment room emergency chord.
- Show me.

Sarge?

Emergency.

- Emergency.

She's dead.