Lucy Must Be Traded, Charlie Brown (2003)

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Lucy Must Be Traded, Charlie Brown (2003)

Post by bunniefuu »

Why are you standing

up there, Charlie Brown?

Memories, Linus.

My pitcher's mound may

be covered with snow,

but the memories

are still there.

Happy times, huh?

Some of my

happiest memories.

But what about

all the games we lost?

lt was the fault

of my right fielder.

lt was always my right fielder.

Are we

going to have

a baseball team

again this year?

Yes, but we weren't

going to tell you.

We were all hoping that

you wouldn't find out,

because we all know

that you're the worst player

in the history of the game.

Put me down

for right field.

Well, how does

our ball field look

this year,

Charlie Brown?

l think our groundskeeper

is doing a good job.

The infield

looks great,

and the grass

in the outfield has

never looked better.

l think it's because

we have a new

a*t*matic sprinkler system.

My pitcher's mound looks great.

And our new scoreboard

will keep track

of the games we win this year.

Then all we have

to worry about

is the sound system.

The sound system?

This year, let's try

to get the ball over the plate,

you blockhead!

The sound system

is still working.

l think our team

is in trouble

this year, Charlie Brown.

We're weak

at every position.

Except for right field.

She's exceptionally cute.

Our right fielder

is completely hopeless.

But cute.

l need your

advice, manager.

Since this is our

first day of practice,

what do you think

l should do

with all the money

l'll be getting

for playing ball

this year?

We don't get any money

for playing baseball.

We don't?

Nope. We don't

get a thing.

Well, one

of our players

gets a little something.

Okay, Lucy, stand way back there

by those bushes.

l'm going to hit you a fly ball.

Try to get it back

as fast as you can.

Catch it, Lucy!

Catch it!

lt's in here someplace.

lt's not very easy

playing right field.

Okay, everybody, listen up.

This season, we're going

to emphasize speed.

We're going to have

a real running team this year.

We're going to steal bases

and steal more bases.

We're going to run, run, run!

We're going to be the runningest

team in the league.

lt's going to be go, go, go!

lt's going to...

l can't stand it.

All right.

Let's not have any

of that fancy one-handed stuff.

The only way to

play baseball right

is to use two hands.

And a good set of teeth.

Hey, manager!

lt's too windy

to practice today.

Don't be ridiculous.

Just because your cap blows off,

it doesn't mean it's windy.

Now, that's windy.

Remember, if a fly ball

comes your way,

don't forget to allow

for the wind.

l'm working on it.

Hey, garbage head,

strike this guy out!

You're not supposed

to insult your own pitcher.

Why can't you yell

something encouraging?

Come on, Charlie Brown!

You can do it!

You can do it!

No, he can't.

Come on,

Charlie Brown.

The game is starting.

You're supposed

to be pitching.

l can't pitch knowing

Lucy is in right field.

She's out there, just waiting

to do something stupid.

She drives me crazy.

l'll get you

a drink of water.

l know she's out there.

l can't look.

She's out there, isn't she?

Here, Charlie Brown.

A drink of water

will calm your nerves.

Thank you.

lt's just what l need.

See? l'm hardly shaking.

l'm pretending Lucy

isn't even around.

Okay, let's get

this show on the road.

Our first game is Monday,

and l can't sleep.

l'm a nervous wreck.

l can't sleep.

l keep thinking about all

the errors l'm liable to make.

l'm no catcher.

l'm a piano player.

lt's 2:00, and l'm still awake.

l wonder if any of the others

on the team

are having trouble sleeping.

Good grief!

lt's morning already,

and this is the day

of our first game.

l'm no manager.

l can't run a baseball team.

Everybody knows

l'm a lousy manager.

Nobody even pays attention

to me.

They all hate me.

l think l'll just stay in bed.

Maybe it'll rain.

Maybe no one else

will show up either.

l'll just stay in bed,

and l'll...

Okay, manager,

rise and shine!

Why do we have to

play the first game

so far from home?

That's the schedule.

The only time

l hate being the catcher

is when we go on the road.

l wonder if we're

going the right way.

How much further,

Charlie Brown?

Only about two

or three more blocks.

l hate being

the visiting team.

They're here, sir.

Hiya, Chuck.

Welcome to our neighborhood.

We appreciate you coming

over here with your team

for the first game

of the season.

Thank you.

Why don't you guys

take the field

for a little warm-up?

Then we'll

start the game.

Okay. l'll hit

them a few flies.

Good grief, Lucy!

You're going to have

to do better than that.

What did you expect?

l'm suffering from jet lag.

Oh, no, you don't.

You get fed after the game,

not before.

l hate these salary disputes.

Good grief!

May l ask you how you

intend to play shortstop

with a supper dish

in your mouth?

l should never ask.

Have you seen

our baseball schedule

for this year?

My team plays

your team 12 times.

We slaughter you twice

in April,

smash you three times

in May,

and ruin you once

in June.

We m*rder you twice

in July,

annihilate you three times

in August,

and pound you once

in September.

lt's a great schedule,

huh, Chuck?

Yeah. Just beautiful.

Hmm.

Something is missing.

You know that, Chuck?

This is our first

game of the season,

and we don't have any

opening-day ceremonies.

l remember, once,

when l saw a game on TV,

they released

a huge flock of pigeons

that soared up into the sky,

and then flew in great circles

around the stadium.

We need something like that,

Chuck.

We have a

surprise for you.

Open the cage, Snoopy.

That's not the same

thing at all, Chuck.

We're the home team, Chuck,

so you guys bat first,

and we'll take the field.

Okay, Snoopy, you're

our leadoff batter.

Let's start

things off big.

But look out

for Peppermint Patty.

She's a good pitcher.

Here we go--

the first pitch of the season.

Oh, how l love baseball!

Yike!

What kind of game

are you playing?

You beaned my best player.

l didn't do it

on purpose, Chuck.

He was crowding the plate.

l was just trying

to brush him back.

Forget it.

l'm taking my team home.

You can't forfeit the game,

Chuck.

lf you go home, you lose.

Don't forfeit the game, Chuck!

l'm disgraced.

Winning a game from Chuck's team

by forfeit

is the most degrading thing

that can happen to a manager.

Maybe you should

forfeit the forfeit, sir.

Stop calling me ''sir.''

Well, manager,

we've lost all

ten games so far.

So what are you

going to do about it?

l think we can

b*at this team today.

They've only won one game.

Wow!

The greatest catch l ever saw.

l just know this is going

to be our lucky day.

Hey, pitcher,

hold it for a second.

Do you think baseballs

are livelier

than they used to

be, Charlie Brown?

No, but l am.

lf you throw a fastball

right across the center

of the plate...

...it can have

strange side effects.

Hey, big brother,

someone from the

baseball magazine just called.

Really? Do you think

they want to interview me?

No. They said

your subscription had run out.

Hey, pitcher, l'm going

to bring you something

l think you need.

Well, we lost again, manager.

Your whole team

is ready to quit.

Our season is in ruins.

l've made

a big decision.

This is

the time of year

when all the big

baseball trades are made.

l'm going to try

to improve our team

with a few shrewd trades.

Hey, that's a great

idea, Charlie Brown.

Why don't you

trade yourself?

Hello.

Hello. Peppermint Patty?

l was wondering

if you'd be interested

in trading

a few baseball players?

Well, l don't know, Chuck.

The only good player you have

is that little kid

with the big nose.

You mean Snoopy?

Oh, no, l could never trade him.

l was thinking more of Lucy.

Hello? Hello?

How are your baseball trades

coming, Charlie Brown?

Terrible.

Peppermint Patty said

the only player she would be

interested in would be Snoopy.

l told her no,

but maybe l was wrong.

You mean you'd trade

your own dog

just to win

a few ball games?

Win.

Have you ever noticed what

a beautiful word that is?

Win-- what a wonderful sound.

Win, win, win.

Hello. Peppermint Patty?

l've decided to take you up

on your offer.

That's great, Chuck.

l'll give you five players

for Snoopy.

l'll guarantee,

it'll improve your team, Chuck.

Why don't l bring a contract

over on Monday,

and we'll settle

the whole deal, okay?

Uh... okay.

Okay, fine. Fine.

Good-bye.

What have l done?

l've traded away my own dog.

l've become a real manager.

Okay, Chuck,

here's the contract.

l'm trading you five

players for Snoopy.

l'm kind of nervous.

l've never taken part

in any big baseball

trades before.

Maybe l should think about this

a little while and...

Don't be ridiculous.

You want to build a

better team, don't you?

Come on,

sign right here.

Try not to let your hand

shake so much, Chuck.

You're spilling ink

all over the contract.

Snoopy, this is

a hard thing for me to say.

l've traded you

to Peppermint Patty

for five new players.

All l ask is a little

understanding,

and some sign from you that

you don't hate me.

You did what?!

l've traded Snoopy

to Peppermint Patty

for five good players.

He's the only player

she would trade for.

l had to do it.

But he's your own dog!

Does winning a ball game

mean that much to you?

l don't know; l've

never won a ball game.

You traded your own dog.

l'm so disappointed

in you, Charlie Brown,

that l don't even want

to talk to you.

And stop breathing

on my blanket.

l was so wrong.

l can see it now.

l simply lost all sense

of proportion.

The thought of possibly winning

a few ball games,

blinded me to the duty l have

to love and protect my dog.

Look, Snoopy,

l'm tearing up the contract.

l'm going to tell

Peppermint Patty

that the deal is off.

What did you say?

Oh, good grief.

What's this?

You've torn up

our contract, Chuck?

You must have

gotten my message.

What message?

Those five players l was

supposed to trade to you

said they'd

give up baseball

before they'd play

on your team.

Sorry, Chuck,

the deal's off.

l hope your feelings

aren't hurt.

l'm crushed.

Now that Snoopy's back,

maybe we can win some

of our final games.

Hey, manager,

l have a great idea.

You know what we ought

to do to win?

We ought to pray.

Pray?

Would that be fair?

Why not?

l pray all the time

out there in right field.

Me, too.

l always pray

they won't hit the ball to me.

Please don't let

him hit to me!

Please, not to me!

Not to me!

Not to me!

Oh, thank you!

Thank you!

Oh, thank you.

Amen.

l just can't stand it.

Hey, manager?

How come we don't have

cleats on our shoes?

Cleats?

You know, spikes.

Whenever l come to the

mound to talk to you,

l stand here like this,

and then l start

to slide backwards.

lf l had cleats,

this obviously wouldn't happen.

We'd have a better team

if we all had cleats

on our shoes.

We'd be a better team

if you had something

under that cap!

l'll bet Babe Ruth had

cleats on her shoes!

Somehow, we've got

to get rid of Lucy,

or we'll never win a game.

l just got a great idea.

lt's too darn hot.

l'm going to go stand in

the shade under that tree.

Try to pitch the ball

so they'll hit it to me

under the tree.

l have a better idea.

Go home and pour yourself

a cold glass of lemonade,

and then sit down

in the kitchen.

Leave the back door open!

l'll pitch the ball

so they'll hit it

through the door,

into the kitchen,

where you'll be having

your cold lemonade!

l wonder

if he was being sarcastic.

What's this?

My fielder's glove

and a pepperoni pizza,

which is going to be

my snack between innings.

What happens if you

get the glove

and the pizza mixed up?

Boy, you must think

l'm really stupid.

Let's not give up,

Charlie Brown.

Remember what they say:

The game isn't over

until the fat lady sings.

Or until the shortstop wakes up.

What would your fantasy

team be, Charlie Brown?

A team that doesn't have

you on it.

l should never ask

questions like that.

Hey, manager!

Let's see them try to hit one

over the fence now!

l'm ready for him!

Ugh!

Do you think we can get

the ball back

and leave her

on the other side of the fence?

Lucy is driving me crazy.

How can we get her off the team?

l'll show you.

Get lost! Go away!

We don't need you! Go home!

Tell me who you guys

are yelling at,

and l'll help you

get rid of him.

How could we have lost

Why couldn't the score

at least have been 53 to 1?

We were robbed.

Hi, Chuck.

You've been over here

and watched some of our games,

haven't you?

Sure, l'm one

of your biggest fans.

You have a great team.

Well, good.

You should come over today

because it's

fan appreciation day.

When you go to some ball parks

on fan appreciation day,

they always give away caps

and T-shirts and jackets

and gloves and bats

and everything.

Hi, fan.

We appreciate you.

You mean, that's it?

We have a low budget, Chuck.

Can't talk now, Chuck.

l'm having trouble

with my right fielder.

You, too?

Sir, why do l always

have to play right field?

lt's traditional.

The worst player always

plays right field,

and you're our

worst player.

But you wear

your glove well, Marcie.

Thank you, sir.

l really appreciate

the compliment.

Hey, Chuck.

l'm calling to see

if you're interested

in trading right fielders.

l hate baseball.

Wow. Of course l'd trade

you Lucy for anyone.

Sure, l'll trade you

Marcie for Lucy.

Yeah, l know,

Marcie isn't very good.

l hate baseball.

But she has a lot

of enthusiasm.

Oh, how l hate baseball!

You've got a deal.

Thanks a lot.

The greatest trade

in the history of baseball.

You what?

You traded me for that

stupid girl with the glasses?

You were robbed,

you blockhead!

No, l think

l got a better deal.

She agreed

to throw in a pizza.

Hi, Charles.

l'm your new

right fielder.

l've heard that you have

sort of a weird team.

Marcie, you should be

out in right field.

l'm happier standing

here with you, Charles.

Actually, Charles,

l hate baseball.

l'm only playing

on your team

because l've always

been so fond of you.

But what if someone hits

the ball to right field?

Who cares?

l'm happy just standing

here next to you, Charles.

We don't win any games,

but l have happy players.

Okay, Lucille.

This next hitter is pretty good.

So keep your eye on the ball.

That's hard to do when

you keep moving around.

Get back out there

in right field,

where you belong!

Women managers are even

crabbier than men managers.

Sorry l missed

that one, manager.

Maybe my glove

isn't big enough.

Big enough?

Ha! You know what you need?

There.

Use this to catch 'em.

Good thinking, manager.

Aah! Catch it, Lucy!

Throw it, Lucy!

Throw the ball!

Throw it!

Throw it! Throw it!

Sorry, manager.

lt took me a while

to unplug my hair dryer.

l made a mistake, Chuck.

l admit it.

Lucy is the worst player

l've ever seen.

You've just got

to take her back.

l know you traded her to me

for Marcie and a pizza,

but now l want to call

the whole deal off.

What do you say, Chuck?

But l already ate the pizza.

l hear l just got

traded back, Charles,

so l just wanted

to say good-bye.

l guess l wasn't much help

to your baseball team,

l didn't score

a single goal,

and l never even made

a free throw.

Maybe now that Lucy's back,

she'll play better.

Catch it, Lucy!

For one time in your life--

catch it!

Are you crazy?!

You can't catch

a ball like that!

And it's not even raining!

That's what you think.

Hey, where's everybody going?!

lt's just a little rain!
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