10x03 - Girly Squirrely/Birthday Battle

[bunniefuu]

[jazzy music]

- ♪ Timmy's still an average kid ♪

♪ That no one understands

♪ Chloe's his new neighbor

♪ And she's ruining all his plans ♪

- Aah!

- ♪ All the wishes

♪ In the world

♪ So why should he care?

♪ Jorgen has reported there's a fairy shortage ♪

♪ So Timmy has to share

♪ His OddParents, fairly OddParents ♪

- More than one? - This should be fun!

- ♪ OddParents, fairly OddParents ♪

♪ Feather suit, nature boots, laser sh**ting, rescue ♪

- World peace, kale treats,

bunny feet, real neat!

- What? No! Leave me alone!

My fairies! Get your own!

- ♪ OddParents, fairly OddParents ♪

♪ Timmy, beware, you'll have to share ♪

♪ Your fairly OddParents

- Yeah, right!

[cheery, upbeat music]

♪

- Oh, Squirrelly Scout Timmy,

time for s'mores.

I've got a roaring fire going.

- Ah!

Ah!

Dad, you're on fire!

- I am on kind of a roll lately.

- Ah!

- What's with the blood-curdling scream, Timmy?

- Were you dreaming about your report card again?

- Oh, it was more horrible than that.

I dreamt my dad took me

on another Squirrelly Scout camping trip.

But that could never happen

because our lame-o troop was banned

by the Squirrelly Scout Council.

- Oh, Timmy,

our lame-o troop has been unbanned

by the Squirrelly Scout Council.

- Why? No! What?

No! Pain! Fear!

- We're going on another Squirrelly Scout camping trip.

- Help! No. Who? Help! No! More fear!

- I'm rich now, Timmy,

and despite the angry protests of the fire rangers,

I bought us another chance.

I also bought a miniature horse, but I can't find it.

[horse whinnies]

Biscuit, where are you?

Follow the sound of my voice!

Anyhoo, all we have to do is earn a single merit badge,

and Squirrelly Scout Troop Lucky

is back in business.

- But Dad, the only way our troop

could ever earn a merit badge is if we cheat.

- But we can't cheat because of this guy.

- [growls]

- Ah!

Oh, I get it.

This is still my nightmare.

- No, it's a vicious Kodiak bear.

The council assigned him to judge whether or not

we earn a badge.

- Dad, only a total nutjob

would want to go on another Squirrelly Scout camping trip.

- I'm here!

Squirrelly Scout Chloe Carmichael

reporting for duty.

- Timmy, she said "doody."

[laughing]

Stop judging me, bear!

- Chloe, trust me,

you do not want to do this.

- Oh, but I do.

I love communing with nature

and bonding with my fellow campers.

- Okay, but we don't do any of that.

Besides, girls aren't allowed to be Squirrelly Scouts.

- Ooh, injustice.

I love overcoming injustice!

Here goes.

I wish girls were allowed to be Squirrelly Scouts.

[triumphant fanfare]

- Ooh!

Girls are suddenly allowed to be Squirrelly Scouts.

Well, off to the barren and unforgiving wilderness.

- Ooh,

I love the unforgiving wilderness.

I love it so much!

- Oh, man,

I wish I was lost with Biscuit.

- [whinnies]

- Just my luck.

Biscuit was lost in the Squirrelly Scout bus.

- Come on, Timmy.

Let's sing the Squirrelly Scout song.

all: ♪ We are little Squirrelly Scouts ♪

♪ We like to hoard our nuts

♪ We climb up trees and skin our knees ♪

♪ And shake our squirrelly butts ♪

- Ooh! Ooh, I wrote a new verse.

♪ No matter what, we never quit ♪

♪ We're loyal and we're kind

♪ Through poison oak and fire and smoke ♪

♪ No Squirrel gets left behind

- She said "behind."

[laughs]

Stop judging me!

Attention, Scouts.

I'd like you all to meet our newest Squirrelly Scout,

Chloe.

That's a girl's name

because she's a girl.

- A girl?

I hear if you touch them,

they control your brain for life.

- It's true. It's true!

[thunder booms]

all: Ahh!

- Are we gonna be eaten by Stinkfoot?

- Want some cheese with that whine, Ricky?

Sweet, dim Ricky, there is no Stinkfoot.

- Ahh!

all: Ahh!

- Okay, who needs to change their pants?

Just me?

- I love spending time with Chloe and Timmy,

but this place stinks.

- Don't worry, baby. I've got an idea.

- [growling]

- Ah!

[laughing]

- Ta-da!

We've been eaten by a bear,

which is way better than camping.

- I hear you.

Ooh, look, a bubbling brook.

Let's see how deep it is.

- Oh, what do you know.

It's highly corrosive stomach acid.

both: Ah!

- We gave the bear indigestion.

We got to get out of here before we end up like our wands.

Boy, Wanda,

you really didn't think this through,

did you?

[shouting and crying]

- Okay, fellow Squirrelly Scouts,

gather around.

- Ah! - Ugh.

- I got stung by a bee on my tongue.

- I'm lost!

- We're right here, Kevin.

- Everyone chill!

Time to get that merit badge.

All we have to do is pick a challenge

from the "Squirrelly Scout Manual."

I say we go for the rock climbing badge.

- We did it! I climbed a rock!

Everybody to the bus.

Seriously, stop judging me!

- Focus!

If we want the merit badge,

we have to climb Mount Stinkfoot.

[thunder booms]

all: Ahh!

- There are s'mores up there.

- Ooh, s'mores,

my sweet, chocolaty mistress.

Out of my way!

- See, Timmy,

all the trip needed was a little motivation.

- But you lied about the s'mores.

- No, I didn't.

I hiked up to the top of Mount Stinkfoot

and left some s'mores while you were putting up your tent wrong.

By the way, I fixed your tent.

- Ah.

- I touched her!

Now she controls my brain!

- There's not much to control, Ricky.

- Okay, pretty much everyone's stopped crying,

so I think we're ready to try

for the white water rafting merit badge.

[all crying loudly]

- Or let's not and say we did.

[chuckles]

Fine.

Let's go, scouts.

- Ah!

all: Ah!

- You're doing great, guys,

but you might want to paddle.

all: Ah!

- Ooh, I know what to do.

Everyone stand up and panic.

Ah!

all: Ah!

- We did it!

[all shivering]

- Hey, Squirrelly Scouts,

that was a good try on the rafting badge.

We got close.

- Close to the end.

I saw white light!

both: Help! Help!

- And now I'm seeing tiny people in the bear's eyes!

- Well, Stuart, it's official.

You're our weakest link.

- Come on,Chloe.

The troop is hopeless.

Can't you just quit like the rest of us?

- Wait? What?

Did you just say the Q-word?

That is a ba-a-a-a-ad word, Timmy!

- Uh, "quit?" - Potty mouth!

I read the entire "Squirrelly Scouts Handbook,"

and I found a merit badge that anyone can get,

even chimps have done it.

- Come on,

these guys are nowhere near chimp standards.

- It's the knot-tying badge.

If you can tie your shoes, you can earn this badge.

Okay, troop, take your rope, fold it over,

and pull one end through the hole.

Easy-peasy.

- We did it!

I'm hanging by my knots.

Ah!

Ooh.

[all shouting]

all: Ah!

- So many kinds of pain!

[all shivering]

- It's cold.

- [yawns]

both: Help!

- And I just saw the little people

screaming in the bear's mouth.

- Chloe, I'm inspired by your can-do attitude.

Scouts, we can't do this.

all: Yay!

- Too bad, Chloe.

Looks like everyone's quitting.

Yeah, I said it.

"Quit-ting"

- Wait, what?

No. No, no, no, no, no, no!

- Oh, everyone stand back.

Chloe's gonna blow.

- No!

We came here to get those stinking badges,

and nobody's leaving until we do!

It's right there in the stupid Squirrelly Scout song!

No matter what, we never quit.

We're loyal, and we're kind.

Through poison oak and fire and smoke,

no Squirrel gets left behind!

- Got to be honest, I've come to hate that song.

- Don't cross me, Timmy's dad!

- Ew. Do I smell stinky feet?

- [roars]

all: Stinkfoot!

- [roars]

- I have to admit, that's kind of a relief.

She was setting a pretty high bar.

- Chloe's in trouble, and she's a Squirrelly Scout.

And like the song says,

"No Squirrelly Scout gets left behind."

Dad, Chloe has the s'mores.

- What?

My graham crackery reason to live.

Squirrelly Scouts to the rescue.

- I'm going in.

Chloe,

I'll save you from...

sharing a chocolaty treat

with your new hairy friend?

- Stinkfoot is just misunderstood.

He's actually a kind and gentle woodland creature

who just so happens to smell like a decomposing raccoon.

Thanks for coming to my rescue, guys,

but Stinkfoot only wants the s'mores.

- He still has the s'mores?

Oh, it's you and me, Stinkfoot,

mono-a-stinko.

[grunting]

Ah!

- Whoa.

We got merit badges for bravery.

I knew we could do it! I knew it! I knew it! I knew it!

I knew it!

all: Yay!

- I got the s'mores

and put you all in terrible danger.

Run!

all: Ah!

- [whinnies]

- Biscuit!

Oh, my tiny, pink hero,

floor it!

all: Aah!

Yay!

- [sneezes]

- We're finally free!

- Greatest plan ever.

- The tiny people are real!

- Weak link!

- Free at last!

[dramatic music]

♪

[clock ticking]

- Ah! It's coming.

Brace yourself.

both: Ah!

- I love you, Cosmo.

- I'll never forget you, Wendy.

You're name's not "Wendy," is it?

Winifred, Wilma,

Shaniqua?

[bell rings]

both: Ah!

- It's time!

It's time to plan my birthday.

My birthday is tomorrow,

and we're taking this year's party to the next level.

- I'm still having flashbacks from last year's level.

- [roars]

- Oh, Timmy,

time for birthday cake.

Wow.

I've never been to this part of the backyard before.

Eeh! Bad doggie.

No cake for you.

- [roars]

- Ah!

all: Ahh!

- Everyone, calm down.

The cake's okay!

both: Ah!

- Relax, you guys, my dad recovered.

- Dinosaurs are real and nobody believes me!

- Physically.

Okay, guys,

for this year's party

I want the characters from my favorite movie franchise,

the Change-morphers,

so charge up your wands and get ready to focus on me,

me, and only me.

Don't forget about me.

It's all about me!

Me, me, me, me, me, me!

- Yeah, we've got some bad news

that Wilma's gonna give you

while I cower fearfully behind her.

- Uh, Sport, it's, uh,

Chloe's birthday tomorrow, too,

and since there's this whole sharing-your-fairies thing,

you're gonna have to share us.

Engage tantrum field!

- No!

- Relax, Timmy.

Chloe probably isn't nearly as much of a birthday psycho as you

because, well, no one is.

- Whoopie!

Whoo-hoo! It's my birthday!

[laughs]

- "Happy birthday me, me, and only me."

She stole my selfish slogan!

- She's a total birthday psycho?

I knew it!

- Happy birthday me, me, and only me.

Hey, guys.

I'm so excited about my first wish-powered birthday.

I made a list, just a few little things I want for my party.

It's gonna be a unicorn theme,

so I want a unicorn cake,

unicorn plates, unicorn party hats.

- You've got fairies.

You can wish for real live unicorns.

- Of course!

I want that!

I want it so bad!

- Whoa, whoa.

Tap the brakes, crazy lady.

It's my birthday tomorrow, too,

and I got dibs on the fairies.

- Oh, well, happy birthday.

What an amazing coincidence

that we were both born on the same day!

Now listen, buster, here's how it's gonna go down.

My birthday is the one day of the year I put me first.

And if I don't get to, it's gonna get ugly!

- You don't scare me.

Well, maybe a little,

but I'm not backing down from anybody on my birthday!

- Then the birthday battle lines are drawn, Timmy Turner.

both: It's on!

[rooster crows]

[alarm blaring]

[noisemaker blows]

- [laughs]

: a.m.

Happy birthday to me!

Chloe Carmichael,

you got to get up pretty early to outfox Timmy Turner.

- I did!

- Ah!

all: Whoo! Yay!

- What the--

What time did you get up?

- I never went to bed!

- Curses.

- I'm feeding a unicorn!

[flatulence]

And he just farted a rainbow.

This is the greatest party ever!

all: Yay! Whoo!

- Every kid in town is here.

How could this happen to me?

- You know what they say, Sport,

"The early bird gets the farting unicorn."

- I don't want a farting unicorn!

Cosmo, Shaniqua,

I want a Change-morphers party now!

["Charge" plays]

♪

[upbeat electronic music]

♪

- Happy birthday!

Greetings, birthday boy.

I am Maximus Awesomeness.

Since the dawn of time,

I have traveled through the cosmos battling evil

in the name of all that is good and--

- Blah, blah, blah.

Just get to the cool changing stuff.

- Fine.

I was only halfway through my origin story,

but whatevs.

Awesomeness power, activate.

[upbeat music]

- I am Macho Nacho!

Nacho powers, activate.

[bell dings]

- Thanks for the nachos

and for not talking as much as the other guy.

- How's it going, eh?

I am Zambonius.

With my Zamboni powers activated,

I can rid the world of ice that is bumpy

and therefore difficult on which to skate.

- Oh, really? Who cares about that?

- Hey, everyone, a Zamboni!

Turner's having the greatest party ever!

all: Whoo! Yay!

- Good one, Timmy. You win.

I'll just be over here alone on my birthday

where I wish it was raining no homework passes!

[thunder booms]

all: Yay! Whoo!

- Ha-ha, ha.

- Boy, Chloe really thinks her party's awesome.

Well, mine's gonna get even awesomer.

Let's take this party up a notch.

- How about taking it up a nacho

with some magic nachos!

Ole!

Ah!

Wow, these are deafeningly delicious.

- Don't you mean "definitely?"

- Can't hear a thing.

I got cheese in my ears.

- Cosmo, Wanda!

I know what this party needs.

[wind blows, horse neighs]

- Guests? - Yes.

And you know how I'm gonna get them?

- FYI, I am completely deaf from the magic nacho expl*si*n,

but don't worry. I'm really good at reading lips.

- I wish everyone in Dimmsdale would come to my party

and never go back to Timmy's no matter what.

- You've got it.

Evil elves coming up.

[shouting and growling]

- Cosmo, that's not what I wished for.

- Ah!

[unicorns whinny]

- Oh, this is bad.

Elves and unicorns are mortal enemies.

- Wanda, poof them away!

- Wah!

[exciting music]

♪

- Cosmo! Wanda!

- Oh, no. Timmy's calling.

We'll be right back, Chloe.

What's up, Sport?

There's kind of an emergency over at Chloe's.

- I'm having an emergency too.

Maximus Awesomeness is telling his origin story again!

- My mother was a trash compactor,

and my father was a golf cart,

but a really nice golf cart.

- Read your lips.

The Change-morphers' mortal enemies, the Destroy-icons,

will now appear at your birthday party

and engage in an epic battle!

[dramatic music]

all: Ah!

♪

- Ah!

- Spawned in the maelstrom of dark matter,

we have traveled through time and space--

- Blah, blah, blah.

Help me, Cosmo!

- Got it, Timmy.

More Destroy-icons coming up.

- I will destroy you!

[lasers whirring]

all: Ah!

- I've got to findmy wand!

- Ah!

- Ah!

both: Ah!

Worst party ever!

[unicorns whinnying]

[lasers whirring]

- Maximus?

What are you doing here?

I thought you were on vacation at that dude ranch.

I checked out the website.

It looked awesome.

- It was maximus awesomeness,

then some spoiled little human boy summoned me for his party.

- I feel you.

I was fishing with my bros on Gumdrop Lake,

and some unicorn-loving little girl summoned us for her party.

- Hey, guys, why are we fighting each other?

We should be after the two bratty kids who dragged us here.

- Let's destroy the boy and girl,

enjoy a nice hot plate of nachos,

then vaporize the planet.

- Oh, yes, that sounds lovely.

Oh, I love nachos.

both: Ah! Ah!

Cosmo, Wanda, help!

- I found my wand.

It was in Mr. Crocker's gift bag.

- Give me back my crazy straw!

- What are we gonna do,Timmy?

Every time we make a wish, Cosmo gets it horribly wrong.

- Let's go with that.

Cosmo, we wish that this nightmare party

would never end.

- Read your lips.

You want a nice, simple party that you would've had

if you weren't both being total birthday psychos.

[both sigh]

- Good job, Timmy.

- I just got lucky.

Anyway, happy birthday, Chloe.

- Happy birthday,Timmy.

[noisemakers blow]

both: Best birthday ever!

- Read your lips again.

Here you go.

- Oh, Timmy,

some men with nets brought me to the brain doctor,

and now I know that dinosaurs aren't real.

- [growling]

[roars]

- Dinosaurs are real!

- I'm driving a Zamboni!