10x14 - Space Ca-Dad/Summer Bummer

[bunniefuu]

[jazzy music]

- ♪ Timmy's still an average kid ♪

♪ That no one understands

♪ Chloe's his new neighbor

♪ And she's ruining all his plans ♪

- Ahh!

- ♪ All the wishes

♪ In the world

♪ So why should he care?

♪ Jorgen has reported there's a fairy shortage ♪

♪ So Timmy has to share

♪ His OddParents, fairly OddParents ♪

- More than one? - This should be fun!

- ♪ OddParents, fairly OddParents ♪

♪ Feather suit, nature boots, laser sh**ting, rescue ♪

- World peace, kale treats,

bunny feet, real neat!

- What? No! Leave me alone!

My fairies! Get your own!

- ♪ OddParents, fairly OddParents ♪

♪ Timmy, beware, you'll have to share ♪

♪ Your fairly OddParents

- Yeah, right!

[triumphant music]

♪♪

[pleasant music]

[motor whirring, horn honks]

[tires screech]

- Yee-hee-hee! Did it come? Did it come? Did it come?

Yes!

This is the most awesome thing ever.

- Well, we know he's not looking at his report card.

- Yee!

- Well, he could be, Cosmo.

Maybe Timmy's been studying.

[groans] Who am I kidding?

- Yeah, who are you kidding?

This is an awesome flyer

from the National Federation of Squirrely Scouts.

They're having an invitation-only jamboree

at Lance-a-Lotta Pizza.

- Ooh! That's the most exclusive medieval-themed

Italian restaurant in Dimmsdale.

I love any dining establishment

that has historical relevance and food puns.

They have Chicken Castle-tori and Eliza-beef in bowl.

- Oh, Timmy!

I'm enjoying my new hobby-- mail-swapping!

I take the mail I don't like-- stupid bills and stuff--

and swap it for the neighbor's fun mail,

like this Squirrely Scout flyer from Chloe's mailbox.

They're having a banquet at Lance-a-Lotta Pizza!

I love their Eliza-beef in bowl

with "joust" a dash of cheese.

- Ha! That's a good food pun.

Wait, you took my mail?

- No, silly.

I swapped it!

I left you a big, fat credit card bill

and a strongly worded warning I got from the police

to stop swapping mail.

Look at the cool stuff I swapped for.

I got an acceptance letter to nursing school

and Mr. Somebody's hearing aid.

- Uh, Dad? - [yelps]

Stop yelling at me, Timmy!

[screams]

And now I'm yelling at myself!

I also took the colored pills from Mrs. Lipschitz

that keep her from thinking she's a witch.

- [cackling]

- We have a problem, guys.

- Stop yelling!

Oh, no! I've gone deaf!

- No, you haven't, Dad. We just stopped talking.

- [yelps]

I can hear again. It's a miracle!

- Anyway... according to this flyer,

we don't qualify for the jamboree.

It's only for troops that have Special Flying Squirrely status.

- Ooh, if only we had a scout leader

who could tell us what that is.

- You're the scout leader!

- This is a good hearing aid! I can hear scooters talk!

- You're not wearing the hearing aid!

- Anyway... there are two ways to get

Special Flying Squirrely status.

One is to volunteer at a soup kitchen for hours.

- [shrieks] I hate soup!

There's no way I can eat it for hours.

- The other way to achieve Special Flying Squirrely status

is to explore uncharted territory

and plant the Squirrely Scout flag.

- How hard can that be?

There must be tons of unexplored places.

Why did I never notice those flags before?

- [cackling]

- Ooh!

Looks like the Picklefines just got a fancy package.

Better get swapping. Oh, I hope it's a cheese log.

Please be a cheese log!

- Anyway...

we just have to plant our flag someplace

where no Squirrely Scout has ever been,

like the bottom of the ocean.

[faint fanfare]

Okay. Or the North Pole.

[keys clack]

[faint Christmas fanfare]

Fine, then! How about under my bed?

- This is live.

- That's it, Eric-- this is the last

and grossest place on Earth that didn't have a flag.

- Get out of my room, Eric!

I'm going to Lance-a-Lotta Pizza

if I have to plant my flag in outer space!

Chloe?

[keys clack]

- Looks like outer space is Squirrely-flag free.

- Cosmo, Wanda. [magical pop]

I wish our Squirrely Scout troop could go to outer space.

- [shrieks] The Picklefines got snakes in the mail!

Now I'm in a fine pickle.

Ooh! Ooh, now I want pickles--

and no soup!

[fanfare]

[dramatic music]

♪

[shrieks] Where am I? How did I get here?

Why does somebody hate the Picklefines?

I have so many questions!

- Relax, Dad.

This expedition is gonna get us a free trip

to Lance-a-Lotta Pizza.

- I'm good!

- This is so exciting!

We'll be the first Squirrely Scouts

to plant our flag in space.

All we need is the rest of our troop.

- Roll call.

Whiny Kid.

[magical pop]

- I'm cold.

I'm bored. I'm--

- You're whiny! That's what you are!

Next up, Kid With Issues.

[magical pop]

- Aah!

I'm having that nightmare where I'm in space in my underwear.

- You're a nightmare.

Last and definitely least,Stuart!

[magical pop]

- A-a-ah-choo!

Oh, no.

I'm in space!

I'm allergic to space!

- I'm allergic to you, Stuart.

You're our weak link!

- This is the part of my dream where I realize

no one's driving the spaceship, and I scream.

[screams]

- It's okay, Kid With Issues.

I'm an official Junior Astronaut.

With me at the controls,

nothing can possibly go wrong. [gas hissing]

[all coughing]

- I found s'mores and a campfire

in the Picklefines' mailbox.

They get a lot of weird mail.

Anyhoo...

I bet you're allergic to s'mores,

aren't you, Stuart?

- Actually, they're the one thing my system

can tolerate.

- No shares-ies!

- I'm locking onto the nearest asteroid.

Get ready to plant our Squirrely Scout flag

and go to Lance-a-Lotta Pizza,

where I'm gonna celebrate at their

Off with Your Head of Lettuce Salad Bar.

- Ooh. I'm having

their Leaning Tower of Pizza

with pepperoni and Black Plague olives.

- I did the math! And we have a % chance

of never making it back to Dimmsdale.

So there's a % chance we'll make it.

- And there's a % chance you're bad at math.

- This is the part of my dream where backpacks talk about math.

- Oh, silly Kid With Issues,

backpacks don't talk-- only scooters do.

Ooh! Let's pump up the space jam with some music!

[eerie chimes]

Eeh, what's going on?

There's no tunes, and I feel a little light in the loafers.

- You just turned off the Gravity Stabilizer.

[beeps, Gravity Stabilizer charges]

- Focus. Think pizza.

Keep your eyes on the pies.

- That's an excellent food pun, Timmy,

but if you'll excuse me,

there's marshmallow goo jammed in the controls,

and I have to keep us from hurtling

into that giant ball of fiery gas known as the Sun!

- Oh, no!

I forgot to put on my sunblock!

- No worries, you'll burst into flames before you get a sunburn.

[all screaming]

- Eeh, it's getting hot in here.

On the upside, the s'mores are cooking themselves.

[thermometer tone ascends]

[glass cracks]

[all screaming]

- [straining]

- Aah! I need new underwear!

- Aah! I'm getting a heat rash.

- Aah! I b*rned my tongue!

- [grunts]

Ha ha! [fanfare]

[all cheer]

Okay. We're no longer hurtling towards the Sun.

all: Yay!

- Also, we're half a million miles from Earth

and almost out of fuel.

all: Boo!

- Yay!

- It's okay.

We can save fuel if we get rid of some extra weight.

- Stuart, I'm gonna ask you to take one for the team here.

- You can't throw Stuart out, Timmy's Dad!

- I would never throw him out! He's a child.

I'm asking him to jump out voluntarily.

- It's all good. We have magical fairies.

If things get really bad, we can just wish ourselves out of here.

- Oh, Timmy!

I lightened the load by throwing out your useless backpacks.

[sad fanfare]

[pensive tone]

[both scream]

[both screaming]

[both screaming]

[panting]

- Okay, this is not a problem,

'cause Cosmo and Wanda still have their wands.

[dramatic fanfare]

[both screaming]

- Stop screaming! - You're screaming!

Why can't I scream?

- Ooh, I love ice cream,

especially at Lance-a-Lotta Pizza.

I can never decide between the root beer moat

or the ice cream sand-wench

[buzzer sounds] - Oh!

We're coming up on a small planet.

Or you might call it a "planetoid"

or perhaps a "dwarf planet."

No, it is a planetoid. Although, technically--

- Just land so we can plant the Squirrely Scout flag

and have pizza and jousting!

- Fine.

- Hey. I just realized

we haven't been wearing our seat belts.

- Weak link!

[triumphant music]

♪

- This is perfect.

We have just enough fuel to make it back to Dimmsdale

before the jamboree.

All we have to do is take a selfie

planting the Squirrely Scout flag.

[whimsical fanfare]

Off it goes.

- You know what I just realized?

This is the first Squirrely Scout trip ever

that my dad didn't totally mess up.

- Oh, Timmy!

I swapped mail with someone named The Glorg.

I traded Stuart, who's technically male,

for The Glorg's subscription to "Purrrfect Kitten" magazine.

Ha! Kittens!

[rumbling]

[casual organ music]

- [yawns]

[slurps]

[munches]

[lackluster fanfare]

No kittens?

[roars]

- It's hard to blame The Glorg.

Who would want Stuart?

- [roaring]

[all screaming]

- Actually, this is kind of cool.

We discovered life on a planetoid.

Well, actually, it's more of a planet, but technically--

- Less talking, more running!

- It's hard to run without my arch supports.

Someone stole them from my mailbox!

- Swapped!

- [roaring]

[feet screech]

[lively dramatic music]

[all screaming]

- Oh, this is my bad, g*ng.

I realize now that swapping mail is a bad hobby.

I'll never do it again!

- Probably won't have a chance anyway,

'cause The Glorg's holding a spork!

[all scream]

- [moans]

[fanfare] - Wait a minute!

He's got a coupon to Lance-a-Lotta Pizza.

- Well, what do you know?

They have franchises in Dimmsdale, Bakersfield,

and Glorgitron Five.

[medieval fanfare]

- Says here, "With six guests,

Glorgs eat free."

He doesn't want to eat us.

He wants to eat with us.

He's actually a big sweetie!

- Or he's cheap.

- Don't mess with The Glorg, Timmy.

- Um, excuse me, Mr. The Glorg?

Just a heads-up--

I-I can't digest cheese.

- Oh, weak link.

- Up top, Glorg!

[jazzy fanfare]

[all cheering]

- We finally made it to Lance-a-Lotta Pizza.

And it was totally worth almost bursting into flames

and being eaten by The Glorg.

- Look, Timmy, I got the Sword in the Calzone.

It's a little bit of a reach as a food pun,

but it's delicious.

- Hey, we didn't order the root beer moats.

- They're on us.

- We got a coupon.

It's Talking Backpack Tuesday, so we eat free.

- Timmy, don't tell The Glorg,

but I still have his copy of "Purrrfect Kitten" magazine.

- Hey, you took my kittens.

[roars]

- Swapped!

Run!

[all screaming]

- I'm too full to run.

both: Weak link.

[dramatic fanfare]

[surf rock music]

♪

- Well, class,

as anyone could tell from the looks of psychotic anticipation

on your faces, we have exactly one minute

until summer vacation.

[bell dings]

Oh, another year has passed,

and the official test results

show that you've learned nothing!

- Well, I've learned many things, Mr. Crocker.

For example, I--

- Keep it to yourself, toots!

You're k*lling my summer buzz.

[bell dings]

So long, suckers!

[jazzy music]

[laughing wildly]

[rocket charges, explodes]

[triumphant fanfare]

[teachers cheering]

[children cheering and laughing]

- Get ready to celebrate summer with the master, Chloe.

I wished up a water park and pirate boats with water cannons

and--wait for it--

real pirates!

- Yay, Timmy!

I know it's summer because I saw the teachers

flying through the air and the pirates are back!

- Argh. - Hello, matey.

- Hello.

- [laughing]

- I'm super excited about summer too,

because--wait for it-- [drumroll]

I've been accepted into a rigorous research program

identifying and labeling subatomic particles

in a dark, windowless basement!

[eyeball twitches]

- Avast, ye mateys.

Time to celebrate summer with me,

Greenbeard,

and whoever this weird dude is.

- It's me, Cosmo-- Pinkbeard!

Sorry we were late, guys.

We had to dodge falling teachers the whole way over.

- [wailing]

Yay, summer.

- Get this, guys.

Wendy Windowless Basement here is gonna spend her summer

studying supercalifragatomic party hats.

- Eh, close enough.

The point is, I'm / now.

And it's time for me to leave kid stuff behind

and grow up.

- I'm never growing up!

Cannonball!

[giggling]

[yelps]

Yay, summer!

- I'm even donating my toys to charity...

including my favorite doll--

Gender Neutral Jesse.

- [monotone voice] I love you.

- Aww.

- Aww.

- [yawns]

- Why are you yawning?

Are you boring yourself thinking about your summer?

- No, I was up all night doing research for my research--

pre-search, if you will.

- I won't. Count on it.

- [snoring and muttering] I wish--I wish--I wish...

- Oh, no! Chloe's sleep-wishing.

That can be dangerous.

But according to "Da Rules," we have to grant her wishes.

- Ooh, uh-huh?Uh-huh?

Yes?

If I'm not mistaken-- which I often am--

she wished for this.

[fanfare]

- [screams]

[menacing music]

[all screaming]

- I wouldn't want to change that diaper.

♪

[footsteps thundering]

[car alarm wailing]

Kids wish for the darndest things,

don't you think so, weird dude?

♪

- Mama, Papa,

or primary caregiver.

[electricity crackling]

- Aah! I unwish Chloe's wish!

[wands ding]

[magical pop]

I did not think that through.

Aah!

[pleasant morning music]

- Ahh. I had the weirdest dream.

- It wasn't a dream, Sally Sleep-Wish!

- This could be a problem.

Chloe needs to see Dr. Rip Studwell.

- I'm so free! [surf rock music]

I'm so going to the hospital!

Still better than teaching!

[calming music]

- [sighs]

[magical pop]

- Oh, thank goodness you're here, Dr. Rip Studwell.

Chloe's sleep-wishing.

- Oh, that's bad.

You should call a doctor.

- You are a doctor!

- You're technically correct, weird dude.

- You have to cure me, Dr. Rip Studwell.

I have to get healthy so I can spend my summer

in a dark, windowless room.

- Oh, no, this is the worst possible scenario.

- What is it, Dr. Rip Studwell?

- I don't know how to break this to you,

but I've been walking around with kale in my teeth.

- [gasps] That is NG with the ladies.

Am I right, weird dude?

- I'm gonna need to put a pin in the sleep-wish thing,

while I deal with my own emergency.

This is a Code Kale.

I need that water flosser stat, weird dude.

[magical pop]

[grunts]

Aah! You tousled my man-mane.

This is why I always go with a lady nurse.

- I am a lady!

Tell us how to cure the sleep-wishing!

- I've got the cure right here.

- "Place in a plastic bag, add salt and molasses,

seal shut, then check in seven days."

This isn't how you cure sleep-wishing!

It's how you cure bacon!

- Oh, no!

Is Bacon sick?

This is terrible news.

- You want more of this?

- Okay, okay.

Not the doctor-do.

The reason Chloe is sleep-wishing

is because something is unresolved in her subconscious.

That's fancy doctor talk

for "she's nutsy-cuckoo in her brain-holder."

- I'm not nutsy-cuckoo in the brain-holder.

And I can prove it with this decorative collage

of my daily brain scans.

[pager beeping and vibrating]

- This is an emergency.

I've got a manscape and a mani-pedi...

because I'm all man.

[bell dings]

- Get out!

- Timmy, it's summer! Come out and play!

[laughing]

- Come on, Chloe.

The pirate ship has a water slide on the poop deck.

- You said "poop"! I love summer!

[laughs]

- I wish I could, Timmy,

but I'm gonna have my own summer fun

here in my room, reading about subatomic particles

from my -pound textbook.

- Okay. Just to play it safe,

someone should stay here with Chloe to make sure

she doesn't fall asleep and make another nutty sleep-wish.

- I volunteer Greenbeard.

- You got it, weird dude.

I'm a little too worried

about Bacon's health to play anyway.

Oh, I should make him a card.

[magical pop]

- "Chapter One.

A subatomic particle is a particle smaller than an atom."

[water balloon pops, laughter]

- You took a water balloon in the crow's nest, Pinkbeard.

I never, ever, ever want to grow up.

- Avast, ye summer bummer!

- [sighs]

[magical pop]

[surf rock music] - Come on, Chloe.

You know you're all like,

"I want to yo-ho go outside and play."

- Do not listen to her, Fraulein Chloe.

Summer fun is strictly verboten!

And you are not funny. You are a nincompoop.

- You said "poop"!

- For what it's worth, Chloe, I agree with Chloe.

Now, would the three of you mind signing

my get-well card for Bacon?

[laughter, cheering]

[Dad laughs]

[light jingle playing]

The ice cream truck!

Whee!

[playful music]

[laughing]

[tires squeal]

Stop! I'm not dangerous! I'm a kid!

[magical pop] - Hey, Timmy. Hey, weird, dude.

By the way, has anyone seen Wanda?

- Uh, last time I saw her, she was standing

right in front of you with a pink beard!

- Well, if you see her again,

tell her I'm out of clean socks.

- More importantly, what are you doing here, Cosmo?

You were supposed to stay with Chloe

to make sure she didn't fall asleep.

- Well, I got bored, Timmy,

especially after she fell asleep.

[ground rumbles]

- Mama, Papa, or primary caregiver.

all: Oh, no! It's giant Gender Neutral Jesse!

[menacing music]

- And he--she--it-- they has Chloe!

Cosmo, Wanda, I unwish her sleep-wish!

[fanfare]

[wand rattles, flatulence]

[footsteps thunder]

- This would probably be a good time to tell you

that Chloe wished that this wish couldn't be unwished.

[light jingle plays]

- [laughs] Ooh!

I don't know what to get.

Snow cone, the Banana b*mb,

the Rainbow Rocket,

The Coco-Loco-Nut?

- A gender-neutral giant baby!

- Ooh, that sounds yummy.

I'll take one of those, with sprinkles!

Yay! There's free ice cream all over the street.

It's like delicious roadkill!

- This is nuts.

We got to do something to cure Chloe.

What did Dr. Rip Studwell say again?

- I know.

He had kale in his teeth.

- No, it was something else.

- I love bacon!

- He didn't say that.

- No, no, I just love bacon.

- No, he said something is unresolved

in Chloe's subconscious, wherever that is.

Cosmo, Wanda, poof us there!

[magical pop]

[dreamy harp music]

Wow. We're in Chloe's brain-holder.

- Aw, look, it's kindergarten Chloe.

- Timmy, Cosmo, Wanda?

Can you help me?

I just want to play with Gender Neutral Jesse,

but I can't find her.

All I have is this giant book

for big kids.

- Aww.

Big Chloe won't let Little Chloe play.

This is so sad.[cries]

- Good for you for being in touch

with your feminine side, weird dude.

- I get it.

Chloe really does want to have a fun summer.

But she's forcing herself to grow up too fast.

Don't worry, Little Chloe.

I know where your doll is.

[triumphant music]

♪

- Yay! Now I can play!

[whimsical music]

- Have fun, Little Chloe.

[magical ding]

[menacing music]

- [gasps] What am I doing?

I'm trying to grow up too fast, and I'm wasting my summer.

[magical ding]

- She's falling! Somebody else catch her!

[magical pop]

- Timmy, you saved me from myself.

- And you thanked me by flattening me like a pancake.

- Ooh, you know what goes good with pancakes?

Bacon! That reminds me.

Timmy, weird dude,

you haven't signed Bacon's get-well card.

- Okay, Cosmo.

It's me, Wanda,

and Bacon is not sick

because that doesn't make any sense!

- Weird dude, you're Wanda.

No wonder I had a little crush on you.

[magical ding]

[magical pop]

- Avast, ye mateys!

It is I, Blondebeard.

And we're gonna have the best summer ever,

starting right now,

because I'm a kid!

- So am I!

We're the luckiest kids in the world!

Yay, summer!

- [monotone voice] I love summer.

[magical chimes]

- Hello, Bacon.

I've got good news and bad news.

The goods news is that I am, without a doubt,

the most handsome doctor in the universe.

- And what's the bad news?

- You're cured.

- Wait, you mean I'm better?

- No, you're cured, like all delicious bacon should be.

Better yet, there's enough of you to make sandwiches

for all beautiful nurses I'm having lunch with today.

Well, ten beautiful nurses.

Nurse Debbie is just so-so.

Now, if you don't mind,

I'm gonna take these get-well flowers Cosmo sent you

and use them to woo the nurses.

After all, you won't be needing them.

- [sighs] So this is how it ends.

- Actually,

it ended when Chloe stopped sleep-wishing.

There's no such thing as talking bacon!

Now, say it with me, boys!

all: Yay, summer!

[surf rock music ends]