By the time
Master Geppetto made Pinocchio,
he had already lost a son.
Now this was quite a few years
before my time,
but I learnt the story.
And then it became my story.
Geppetto lost Carlo during the Great w*r.
They'd been together only ten years.
But it was as if Carlo had taken
the old man's life with him.
Whoa.
Whoa!
- Papa! Papa!
- Yes?
- Guess what I saw?
- What?
- Guess!
- I've no idea.
- I saw some planes!
- Oh, did you? Good.
- What is it you're making this time, Papa?
- Guess!
- A soldier? A magician? A witch?
- No.
No! No, no, no, no, no,
you have to wait and see, Carlo!
All good things require patience.
Huh.
They wanted for nothing.
In the name of the Father,
the Son, and the Holy Spirit.
All they needed
was each other's company.
And the old witch
warned the little hedgehog,
"Do not tell lies,
or your nose will grow and grow
up to here!"
His nose would grow?
Lies, my dear boy,
are found out immediately
because they are like long noses,
visible to all but the teller of the lie.
And the more you lie, the more it grows!
Sing me Mama's song so I can sleep.
Please, Papa?
All right.
♪ My son, my son ♪
♪ You are my shining sun ♪
♪ My moon ♪
- Higher, Papa! Higher!
- ♪ My stars ♪
♪ My clear blue daylight sky ♪
♪ And if you looked at me today
My heart would heal so fast ♪
Try it.
- ♪ And if you held me right away, I'd be ♪
- Thank you, ladies.
♪ Complete at last ♪
♪ At last ♪
For you.
- For me?
- ♪ You are my favorite ♪
♪ Favorite thing ♪
♪ Better than sunset, better than spring ♪
♪ You bring me joy ♪
♪ You make me sing in the morning ♪
♪ And the evening too ♪
♪ You are everything to me ♪
♪ And I love you ♪
Pull, Carlo! Pull!
- ♪ My son ♪
- Magnificent job, Geppetto.
- ♪ My son ♪
- Thank you.
♪ You are my golden sun... ♪
Watch out, Carlo!
When one life is lost,
another must grow.
How about this one?
No, no, no, no, Carlo.
It has to be perfect. Complete!
See?
This one's missing some of its scales.
♪ My son ♪
♪ My son ♪
♪ You are ♪
♪ My shining sun ♪
Good night, Papa.
Good night, my son.
I love my new shoes, Papa!
I am very glad, Carlo.
- We're going to church first, right?
- Oh, yes. Yes.
Hello there, little dog!
Buongiorno, Geppetto.
- Morning!
- Morning.
Master Geppetto,
you gonna finish the crucifix today?
We're gonna do our best.
- Ladies.
- Aw, such a perfectionist.
A model Italian citizen.
And such a good father.
Carlo, nice shoes. Catch!
Thank you, sir!
- Good morning.
- Hi!
- Buongiorno.
- Buongiorno, Dottore!
Ah, Carlo.
Geppetto.
Yes...
- It looks great, Papa.
- Oh.
Is it almost time to go home?
Almost!
Send up a little more red for me, Carlo.
Oh! I forgot to show you what I found.
What is it, my boy?
You'll see.
Ta-da!
The perfect pine cone.
It still has all its scales!
I thought I could plant it myself
and watch the tree grow.
And then carve toys for myself.
Like you do.
I think that's as good an idea
as any boy ever had, Carlo.
Isn't it?
What's that sound, Papa? Is it a plane?
Gather the tools.
Quickly.
We'll go home to a warm fire and hot soup.
- Could we have some hot chocolate too?
- Sure. Sure.
It seems like a hot chocolate sort of day,
doesn't it?
Oh, yes, yes, yes. Fine.
Papa! What is it?
Nothing. I'm sure it's nothing but...
Oh, wait. My pine cone!
It was later said Geppetto's
little town was not even a target.
That these planes
were heading back to base
and simply let go of their bombs
to make their ballasts lighter.
Carlo!
Ah!
Huh?
Huh?
No...
Carlo.
Geppetto never left his side.
And that was that.
He worked very little. He ate even less.
And the church's crucifix
remained unfinished.
The years passed.
The world moved on...
but Geppetto did not.
And this is where I come in.
You see, I was a writer.
And for years, I'd been looking
for the ideal conditions to set
my illustrious,
fascinating life story to paper.
Until, at long last,
I found it.
My sanctuary.
Home.
Ah.
Here I could write my memoirs.
And what a tale it would be.
I had lived
in a barrister's fireplace in Sardinia,
sailed on the Adriatic in a fishing boat,
nested one Perugian winter
with an acclaimed sculptor.
Stridulations of My Youth
by Sebastian J. Cricket.
I dreamed of you, Carlo.
I dreamed you were
right back here with me.
My son.
Oh dear.
If only I could have you back.
I am so sorry.
I watched the old man weep.
And it moved me.
And it turns out
that I wasn't the only one watching him.
In my many wanderings on this earth,
I've learned that there are old spirits
living in the mountains, in the forests,
who rarely involve themselves
in the human world.
But on occasion, they do.
I want you back, Carlo.
Right here!
With me!
Why won't you listen to my prayers?
Why?
Where were we?
Ah yes. Perug...
Whoa!
What in my antennae?
I will have him back.
I'll make Carlo again...
Wha... Hey!
...out of this accursed pine!
Whoa! Ah!
What on earth?!
No!
Ah! Ooh! Yah!
It's a house of horrors!
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Huh?
I... I will finish you tomorrow.
Yes, tomorrow.
Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo!
Hey! Get away from there. Go away!
Bugger off.
No, no, no, no, no, no. This is my home!
No trespassing. Go! Go! Go! Go!
Get away from here. Go away! Go away!
Yes, that's right.
Little wooden boy,
may you rise with the sun
and walk the earth.
Excuse me. Can I help you?
This is my home we're talking about.
May I ask, who on earth are you?
On earth?
A guardian.
I care for the little things...
...the forgotten things,
the lost ones.
Well, I am
Sebastian J. Cricket, homeowner.
And I have every right to be consulted
about your schemes and machinations
regarding my property.
Well, since you already live
in the heart of the wooden boy,
perhaps you can help me.
Help you what?
To watch over him.
Guide him to be good.
I'm not a governess, madam.
I'm a novelist, a raconteur,
currently immersed in writing my memoirs.
Well, in this world,
you get what you give.
Take on this responsibility,
and I will grant you one wish.
And that could be anything?
Anything at all?
The publication of my book?
Fame? Fortune?
Anything.
Oh.
Maybe I can help. I'll try my best,
and that's the best anyone can do.
That's rather clever, isn't it?
Little wooden boy made of pine,
we shall call you Pinocchio.
May you rise with the sun
and wander the earth...
Ah!
...and bring joy and company
to that poor heartbroken man.
Be his son.
Fill his days with light
so he'll never be alone.
Ah.
Huh.
Who goes there?
I'm... I'm warning you!
I... I have a w*apon!
Wha...
Good morning, Papa!
What is this? What kind of sorcery?
You wanted me to live.
You asked for me to live.
Who... Who are you?
My name is Pinocchio!
I'm your son!
You are not my son! Don't come near me!
The boy's telling the truth,
Master Geppetto!
It's full of cockroaches!
Ah!
Ugh.
Ah!
Wow!
Ah! Huh?
What is this?
♪ All the things my eyes can see ♪
Huh? No, no, get away from me!
♪ Everything is new to me ♪
You... You stand back! Don't come near me!
♪ Yo dee lo dee lee ♪
♪ What do you call it, call it? ♪
It's a clock. Don't touch it.
♪ What to do with it, with it? ♪
It sings at six o'clock.
♪ Yo dee lo dee lo
Yo dee lo dee lo dee lee ♪
No! Ah!
♪ Yo dee lo dee lo
Yo dee lo dee lee ♪
♪ What do you call it, call it? ♪
That's a hammer.
♪ What to do with it, with it? ♪
You tap. You smash. You shatter.
- ♪ Love it! I love it! ♪
- Ugh!
♪ Yo dee lo dee lo
Yo dee lo dee lo dee dee ♪
♪ Everything is new to me ♪
♪ To me ♪
♪ The world is rich with funny words ♪
♪ They ring like bells, those tiny words ♪
♪ They glow, they shine ♪
♪ They dance in my mind like a chorus line
Those silly words of mine ♪
♪ La la la eee doo
La la la eee doo wooo! ♪
- ♪ What do you call it, call it? ♪
- Uh, a ch... chamber pot.
- ♪ What to do with it, with it? ♪
- Um, uh, I... Oh.
♪ Love it, I love it! ♪
- Ah!
- ♪ Yo dee lo dee lo ♪
♪ Yo dee lo dee lo dee lee ♪
♪ Everything is new
Everything is new to me ♪
♪ Yo dee lo dee lo dee lo dee lee ♪
♪ Yo dee lo dee lo ♪
- Don't...
- ♪ Yo dee lo dee lo dee lee ♪
♪ Love it! Love it! ♪
You must stop!
♪ Everything is new to me! ♪
That was so much fun, Papa!
You're not my son!
What is wrong with you?
Papa?
I'm sorry.
I, uh...
Just stay here. Don't come out.
Time for church.
- Church? I wanna go to church.
- Stay there.
- Church! Church!
- Do you understand?
Church! Church! Church! Church!
Church!
No, no, he told you to stay.
- I'm going to church! I'm going to church!
- No, no, no! Please, stop!
You must obey your papa.
Obey?
To do as you're told!
But I don't want to obey!
Well...
...you must try your best,
and that's the best anybody can do.
♪ My dear father... ♪
I'm going to church!
I'm going to church!
Whoa!
Hi!
Okay, bye!
Hmm.
Oops.
Uh, uh, ah!
Look, Father, over there!
What is that?
Papa!
It speaks!
Papa! Papa! Over here!
Pinocchio.
It's me!
I came to church.
- It's a demon!
- Witchcraft!
Malocchio!
Pinocchio.
No! No, please!
It's... It's a puppet
to... to entertain!
If he's a puppet, where are his strings?
That's true. Who controls you, wooden boy?
Of course, I control him...
Who controls you?
No one talks to the Podesta like that.
He... He's a puppet. Just a puppet!
No, I'm not. I'm made
of flesh and bone and meaty bits!
I'm a real boy!
- A monster!
- Demon!
It's an abomination.
- This is the work of the devil!
- Enough!
This is a house of God.
You drunken fool!
You carving this... this thing
while our blessed Christ
hangs unfinished all these years?
Take that unholy thing away.
Take it away! Now!
Yes. Yes, Padre.
- Shame on you, Geppetto!
- Burn him!
- So sorry.
- Chop him up!
- Oh Dio mio.
- Sorry, sorry.
He'll be fine.
- Curse you, Geppetto!
- The Lord will punish him!
Get out!
♪ Yo dee lo dee
Lo dee lo dee lo dee lee ♪
- Stop fidgeting, please.
- Hello!
Carlo never acted like this.
Papa, why did my nose grow today?
You lied, Pinocchio,
and a lie is plain to see
as your nose and...
And the more you lie, the more it grows.
- Is that it?
- That...
Yes, that's it.
- There you go.
- Chocolate.
Thank you, Geppetto.
We appreciate your hospitality.
Candlewick, go sit by the fire.
We are here to talk about
the incident at the church today.
The community was startled
by your creation.
As Podesta,
I must ensure that this puppet of yours
poses no thr*at to our community.
Oh, no, no, nothing like that.
Oh! Is that
hot chocolate?
You're a puppet!
You've never eaten anything in your life!
Oh! Oh, that must be why I'm so hungry!
Oh, I'm starving, Papa.
I'm starving to death!
You are not!
Now go sit by the fire
and let me talk to our guests.
But I don't want to! I want hot chocolate!
- Please, Papa. Please! Please! Please!
- There, there now.
Here you go.
Oh boy! Thank you! Thank you!
Thank you! Thank you!
Yes. Yes, Pinocchio.
Go... Go warm your feet by the fire.
Obey your papa.
Oh yes, I will obey if I get chocolate.
Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!
He really is a charming boy.
Podesta watches over the town's
moral well-being, you understand?
His authority cannot be questioned...
That's right!
And I won't be mocked!
I will do just as you wish.
You have my word.
- So, what about this wooden boy?
- Ah.
Will you let him run wild
through town all day?
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
I'll keep him locked up!
Right here in the house.
I won't be locked up.
I'll smash the windows out, I will.
This abnormal boy lacks discipline.
But he seems strong, sturdy,
made of good Italian pine.
Oh, very good pine, yes.
Not perfect, you see,
but, uh, he means well.
Hey. Try to get closer to the fire
to get warm.
Son, come here.
Look at my boy, Candlewick.
Yes. Yes.
A model fascist youth.
Proud and brave.
Virile, like his father.
And his teeth, perfect teeth.
And no sign of jaundice.
Papa? Papa!
My feet feel hot, like chocolate.
Look!
Ah! What?!
Fire! My house is on fire!
Yes! Look at me!
Look! I'm on fire! Yay!
Aw. Look what you did, Papa.
You've ruined the nice light on my feet.
This is what you get
with an undisciplined mind.
You must send this child to school.
To school? Pinocchio?
Yes. Tomorrow.
School.
Oh, what a day. What a day.
Oh, what a day. What a day.
Time for bed.
You know, Papa, I like my old legs.
And I like them on fire.
Pinocchio, if you go to sleep,
I'll make you a new pair of legs
in the morning.
Just like the old ones?
Better than the old ones.
Better? Can I have cricket legs, Papa?
Can you make me four of them?
No, no, no, no. No, just two.
Two will do.
Good night, Papa.
Good night, my...
Good night, Pinocchio.
Sebastian?
Yes, Pinocchio?
Who's Carlo?
Carlo was a boy.
Geppetto lost him many years ago.
Where did he put him?
How can you lose a whole person?
I mean, he... he d*ed, Pinocchio.
He's no longer alive.
Is that a bad thing?
Yes. It's a great burden
for a father to lose a child so young.
What's a burden?
It's something painful you must carry
even though it hurts you very much.
I wrote a lot that night.
I had so much to say.
Not about my own life, for a change,
but about imperfect fathers
and imperfect sons.
And about loss and love.
Hmm.
And for that one evening,
at least,
we were, all of us, blissfully oblivious.
You were right, Papa!
These legs are much, much, much,
much better than the old ones!
Ha! Look at me! I can walk backwards. Hup!
And... And jump forwards!
Hup!
- I couldn't do it before!
- Huh?
Ooh, Papa! Can you see this?
He looks just like me.
What is that?
Pinocchio! Come on.
Hurry up. Hurry up.
Oh boy! Oh boy! Oh boy!
I love these new legs, Papa.
- Can we go to the carnival?
- Hmm.
Perhaps, Pinocchio. Perhaps.
Right now we have work to do.
- Work? I love work!
- Hmm.
Papa, what is work?
Oh, Pinocchio, please.
No more questions.
Huh.
Stupid monkey!
Whoa!
I'm coming!
What is it? What are you doing here?
Ah!
I told you to put up posters
and draw big crowds.
This carnival is going to pot! And you?!
Can you not see
how desperate the situation is?
A what?
A living puppet? Are you absolutely sure?
This could get us to the top again!
This could make us kings again!
♪ We were a king once ♪
♪ Can we be king twice? ♪
♪ We were bathing in milk
Played for diamonds and silk ♪
♪ Once ♪
♪ But we want it twice! ♪
♪ My show was a magnet
For the crowd ♪
♪ No one could resist Volpe's crown ♪
♪ Now the little ones ♪
♪ Now the married ones ♪
- Hey!
- ♪ Prefer Garbo, Gardel, Valentino ♪
♪ La voce di Caruso ♪
♪ Jazz on the radio ♪
♪ You were the kings once ♪
♪ Mon dieu, was it nice! ♪
♪ You were knights of the night
Full of glory and might once ♪
♪ So let's get it twice! ♪
- ♪ Believe in you! ♪
- ♪ We were the kings once ♪
♪ Believe in me! ♪
Now let it down.
More. That's it. That's it.
Just a little more. Stop.
There we go.
Very good, child. Very good.
Papa, there's something
I don't understand.
What is it, Pinocchio?
Everybody likes him.
Who?
Him.
- Huh?
- They were all singing to him.
He's made of wood too.
Why do they like him and not me?
Come here, Pinocchio.
People are sometimes
afraid of things they don't know,
but they'll get to know you
and like you, and for that, uh...
Are you ready for school?
Then I have something
I'd like to give you.
Ta-da!
I love it, Papa!
I love it! I love it! I love it!
What is it?
It is a schoolbook.
A very special schoolbook.
One which belonged to a very special boy.
Carlo, the boy you lost?
Uh-huh.
Was he a very good boy, Papa?
Yes, he was.
And you loved him very much?
I did.
I... I do.
Then I will be just like Carlo!
I will obey and go to school,
and I'll be the very, very best
at... whatever they do there.
I'll make you proud!
♪ Off to school, off to school ♪
♪ Going to school, going to school
Off to school I go ♪
Hup! Hup!
Hup! Hup!
He exists!
Oh, this dream, this wonder exists!
You beautiful, brilliant baboon!
I must have him.
Whoa!
♪ Off to school, off to school
Going to school, going to school ♪
Hup!
School! Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!
- What do you learn in school, Mr. Cricket?
- You'll learn reading and writing.
You learn the multiplication tables!
What's the mulplitication tables?
Well, say you have four carts,
each with, uh, 27 apples.
I don't care what the table says.
I have no apples, and I refuse to lie!
Oh, no. It's just math!
So you multiply the four and the seven...
four past seven? And you get...
I get confused.
I don't think
I like school anymore, Sebastian.
Ah! We have found him!
Look, Spazzatura! Our miracle!
- Our sensation!
- Hey, watch it!
Our star!
Who? Me?
Yes, mon étoile!
I am Count Volpe! You have been chosen!
Come partake in
the fun, fanciful, carefree carnival life
as the star of my puppet show!
Don't listen to him, Pinocchio!
You promised your papa
you would go to school!
Oh, yeah.
I promised my papa I'd go to school.
See? He gave me Carlo's book.
Carlo's book? Yes! Yes!
A classical, canonical work.
I can see
you're intrinsically an intellectual!
But then now, book learning cannot compare
to witnessing the wide world
with one's own eyes
from atop the glorious stage.
Wow.
You shall see all
of the nations of the earth for yourself
as they bow at your feet.
My brand-new feet!
No! No, wait!
You have to go to school!
Oh, can we do it tomorrow?
Regretfully, no.
For today's the only day
that our cacophonous carnival
will visit your vicinity,
but if you must go to school,
then you must go to school.
Come, Spazzatura.
We must find someone else
to eat all our ice cream
and popcorn and hot chocolate.
- Hot chocolate?
- Oh no.
Yes, of course!
All the hot chocolate you can drink
and all the games you can play.
Oh boy, oh boy!
Maybe it'll be okay
if I'm a little bit late for school?
Yeah, perfectly fine.
No one will even notice.
Don't listen to him, Pinocchio!
Ah, we have
one last detail to take care of.
Whoa!
Sign here, here, and here. Need a pen?
No, Pinocchio! Don't!
Like this?
Perfect! I will now make you
burn bright like a star!
Follow me, my boy!
Oh, the pain.
Life is such hideous pain.
Master Geppetto,
would you mind coming down?
Oh, at last!
Our savior is restored.
Oh, I'm... I'm so sorry.
Your boy didn't show up at school today.
But he left this morning.
I... I sent him there.
Obviously, the puppet
is quite a dissident.
An independent thinker, I'd say.
- Uh, uh, uh, yes.
- You better look for him.
I trust we will see
the wooden boy tomorrow at school.
Tomorrow?
Oh, yes. Yes, of course.
Ah!
Boy, the carnival sure is grand.
How about some more popcorn?
Oh, I couldn't eat
another bite, Mr. Diavolo.
I better get going to school, I guess.
Stay a while, Pinocchio.
I am sorry to keep you waiting,
my little puppet.
I don't like being called a puppet.
My boy. Puppets are le meilleur qui soit!
The tops! Lift your arm.
Puppets are well respected
in every station of life.
But I thought it was best
to be a normal boy.
Oh, no, no, no. People love puppets.
Like Il Diavolo, Columbina, Punchinello.
Of course, there's but one puppet
who is king of them all!
Oh boy, I'd like to meet that guy.
Pinocchio!
Wait. That's me!
That's right. You are a wonder! A miracle.
They'll love you!
Who?
Les Idiots!
The wonderful children of the world!
Lift your leg. Everyone shall love you
and call your name.
Pinocchio! Pinocchio! Pinocchio!
Pinocchio, the living puppet!
Oh.
A one and a two and...
♪ My gum, my gum ♪
- ♪ I pop my bubble gum ♪
- Yeah!
♪ I scream ♪
♪ I cry ♪
♪ For ice cream and for pie ♪
Pinocchio! Pinocchio!
Pinocchio!
No.
Carlo's book.
What?
Over there.
That song. How could he know that song?
♪ I'm free as the wind ♪
♪ No, I'm flying! ♪
One nightmare after another.
♪ Popping, tapping, gumming ♪
♪ Your son, your son
Is happy to have... ♪
♪ Fun! ♪
Yay! Pinocchio!
Thank you!
And all those treats are
for sale at the carnival.
Thank you!
Pinocchio? What's all this?
What are you doing?
Papa!
I'm a star, Papa! A star!
- They love me! They accept me!
- Oh, what are you...
Enough of this nonsense.
You were supposed to be at school.
And how do you know that song anyway?
You simian simpleton!
My star!
Where is my star?
Thank you. Thank you.
Oh, you're very kind.
You ruined Carlo's book,
and you didn't go to school! Why?
You promised me
you would behave like... like... like...
Carlo.
Yes.
I was going to, Papa, but... but...
Yes, Pinocchio. What?
Ten bandits came out
of the bushes and took...
...out of the bushes,
and they took the book.
Oh, I... I see.
And then what happened?
They had an axe,
and they wanted chocolate.
Hot chocolate!
Pinocchio, you shouldn't lie to me.
I am your papa!
But I'm telling the truth!
Then why is your nose growing?
It's not!
Lies, lies, and more lies!
I am not lying!
Will you look at you?
Go away!
This is not a spectacle!
But it is!
Unhand my carissimo, you carousing...
kleptomaniac!
Do not touch him!
I made him!
And I discovered him!
- He's not your puppet. He's mine!
- Oh!
Perhaps we should...
Oh, he is neither!
He's an actor. My actor.
Give him to me!
Never!
Oh dear.
That was so much fun, Papa!
No!
No...
Pinocchio.
He came out of nowhere!
That's what happens
when you let your children run wild!
Pinocchio was dead.
That much was apparent
to any astute observer.
But little did I know
that death was not the end.
♪ Thou art gone ♪
♪ Thy life hast fled ♪
♪ All shall now bewail thee dead ♪
- Did you hear that?
- Who's there?
- I thought he was dead.
- He is dead. I saw the paperwork myself.
- ♪ No more flesh ♪
- Hello?
♪ And no more bone ♪
♪ No more trouble to bemoan ♪
All right. So, where were we?
Whose deal?
Mine, right?
All right, boys, ante up.
- What's the limit again?
- Twenty's the limit, ya mook.
You got something under there, don't ya?
Probably has a leibedik six.
- Very funny.
- Are you playing a game?
- Flush!
- I wanna play! Please, please, can I play?
What part of dead
don't you understand, schmendrick?
It's boring in there. I hate being dead.
Uh-oh, now you did it.
What's that?
Processing.
Go see the boss, kid.
Through there.
You'll see her.
Give me a freakin' ace, please.
Hello? Hello?
Who are you?
I feel as though you've been here before.
I am Pinocchio. I'm a boy.
And I think I'm... dead.
Ah, yes. I see.
The wooden boy with the borrowed soul.
My sister's folly.
The sentimental fool.
She gave you life, Pinocchio,
when you were not supposed to have it.
No more than a chair or a table should.
As a result, you cannot truly, truly die.
Oh boy, oh boy!
And... And that's good, right?
Well, it means that you are not,
nor will you ever be,
a real boy like Carlo.
The one thing that makes human life
precious and meaningful, you see,
is how brief it is.
Oh.
Don't get me wrong, you will die
many, many times.
This being one of them.
But they are not real deaths.
Just waiting periods.
There are rules, you see.
Despite my sister's disregard for them.
We will both have to wait
for the sand to run out.
You will stay here with me
a little longer each time you cross
until the end of time.
And then, after that sand runs out?
I will simply send you back
every time.
I see.
Well, in that case,
I'd like to ask you one thing.
See you next time.
No.
No.
Ah, Pinocchio.
Niente. There's not much we can do.
I'm afraid the body is rigid.
Well, he's always been rigid.
He's made of wood.
Even if he's dead, I could still book him.
How dare you, sir!
Show some respect.
You show respect to me
and my projected quarterly earnings!
Gentlemen, please.
This is no time for your petty grievances.
How do you intend
to dispose of the dead body?
A dead body? Where?
Pinocchio! You're alive!
He is immortal!
Long live the arts!
It's a miracle.
Take it easy, my child.
Lean on me.
We're going home.
Uh, uh, uh. Wait a moment.
I have a legally binding contract.
Signed by both artist and management.
He either performs,
or you owe me ten million lire!
Well, that's ridiculous.
It's just a smiling sun.
It's still his signature, is it not?
I drew that.
Ha ha!
I demand full restitution before the law,
including transportation,
transmutation, all the future represe...
Our country comes first.
This boy cannot be k*lled.
- He's the ideal soldier.
- Hmm?
He must be drafted
into the youth camps by law.
You will learn to fight,
and fire a w*apon,
and be a real Italian boy.
Now we... we must go.
We truly must go.
We will all speak later, I am sure.
Not to me, sir. Speak to my lawyers!
What... What a day. What a day!
A fun day!
What will we do?
Oh, don't worry, Papa.
I'll go to w*r. It sounds quite fun.
I can learn to fight
and fire a w*apon and march like the...
No, Pinocchio.
w*r is not fun!
w*r is not good. w*r...
w*r took Carlo away from me.
Then I simply won't go.
But you have to go now. It's the law.
Even when it's something bad?
Yes, we all have to obey the law
whether we like it or not.
Why?
I don't have time or patience enough
to explain that to you. I... I...
I owe that man a fortune.
And you... you will be taken far away
and recruited into m*llitary youth camp.
And now... now look
what you've turned me into.
I made you to be like Carlo.
Why can't you be more like Carlo?
Because I'm not Carlo.
I don't wanna be like Carlo.
- Carlo is...
- Enough!
You are such a burden.
Oh.
His nose didn't grow.
What's that?
When he called me a burden,
his nose didn't grow.
That's how he really feels.
I don't want to be a burden.
I don't want to hurt Papa
and make him want to yell at me like that.
Oh, Pinocchio.
Sometimes fathers feel despair
like everybody else.
And they say things,
things they only think they mean
in the moment.
But with time, they learn that...
well, that they
never really meant it at all.
Do you understand?
Hey. Hey, where are you going?
I've got a plan.
- Pinocchio, wha... what are you doing?
- You'll see!
I'm going to the carnival.
That way, I can help Papa,
and I won't go to w*r.
I'll leave him a note
explaining everything.
No, Pinocchio, don't do this.
Oh, that's...
No! No!
Hmm.
No! No, don't do this!
You tell him that I will send him money.
And tell him I love him.
And I won't be a burden anymore.
No!
Huh?
What is it?
What do you want in the middle of the...
My beloved star!
How can I be of assistance?
If I work for you, will you forget
the money you want from my papa?
Huh?
Oh, absolutely, my dear boy.
And will you send him
my share of the profits?
Clear accounting all the way.
Fifty-fifty, right down the middle.
Oh.
Everybody up!
We're leaving!
Oh.
The pain.
Pinocchio. Son.
I just wanted to say...
Pinocchio!
Oh!
Little cricket.
He's gone! To the carnival!
Pinocchio!
Pinocchio!
Pinocchio!
Get! Get!
Oh.
How will I ever find him?
Oh, now you want to find him?
After all the things you said.
After you called him a burden!
A burden?!
Why are you so blind?
So absolutely blind!
The boy loves you.
He has much to learn,
but he loves you for who you are.
Would it k*ll you to do as much for him?
You should start acting like a father.
A real father!
Not an old stubborn goat who's so busy
moaning and crying about his losses...
"Me, me, me, poor me!"
...that he cannot see
the love he actually has!
I may be a bug, sir,
but I have a thing or two
to teach you about...
Hey! Where are you going?
After my son!
Excuse... If I may,
per... perhaps we should... Wait!
♪ Ciao, Papa ♪
- ♪ Mio papa ♪
- Wait! Wait! Wait!
♪ Time has come to say farewell ♪
♪ For how long will I go? Is it far? ♪
♪ No one knows, no one can tell ♪
♪ If I am gone for a long, long time ♪
♪ I'll pack away a fine piece of shine ♪
♪ The sound of birds chirping with bells ♪
♪ Drawings of plums, two bags of shells ♪
♪ The smell of bread, a drop of wine ♪
♪ Your memory, father of mine ♪
♪ Farewell, my papa ♪
♪ Ciao, Papa ♪
♪ Mio papa ♪
♪ Time has come to say farewell ♪
♪ I am ready to go, going far ♪
♪ Now I know it will be swell ♪
♪ I shall be gone for a long, long time ♪
♪ Shall be picking many peaks to climb ♪
♪ Maybe I'll see a camel cry ♪
♪ Dangerous pirates with a black eye ♪
♪ Rain or shine, I'll keep in mind ♪
♪ Your memory, father of mine ♪
♪ Farewell, my papa ♪
Ah!
♪ And as I gambol on my long, long climb ♪
♪ I hold on tight to our best of times ♪
♪ Eyes in the rain, I try to hide ♪
♪ Tears of a boy who shouldn't cry ♪
♪ Forevermore, I'll keep in mind ♪
♪ Your memory, father of mine ♪
♪ Farewell, my papa ♪
♪ I fight for the land ♪
♪ I fight oversea ♪
♪ I'll fight up to the end
Glory to Italy! ♪
♪ The flag in hand for fatherland ♪
♪ Il Duce, Il Duce
We sing out and we pray ♪
♪ The horizon in sight ♪
♪ Stand up, follow the light ♪
♪ Like an eagle soaring
Magnificent and free ♪
♪ I'll be marching
Marching on the path to victory ♪
♪ We are brave! ♪
♪ We are young! ♪
♪ Italia, be jolly ♪
♪ Italia, we are strong! ♪
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
Viva Benito Mussolini, nostro duce!
Viva! Viva! Viva!
Just one last stop.
Don't forget to send
my share of the money back home to Papa.
Oh, I wouldn't dream of forgetting.
See? Fifty-fifty...
minus expenses,
transportation, and promotion.
Huh?
Tomorrow we go
to a small town by the sea. Catania.
And there we will perform
for his excellency, Il Duce.
Il Dolce?
No, my brightest star.
Our fearless leader,
Il Duce, Benito Mussolini!
He heard of our act
and is coming to see us! Oh!
He and I are very close.
Here we are in Roma.
That's him, back there.
You will make me and your papa so proud.
Proud.
Excuse me, sir.
Catania. Do you go there?
Can... Can you take me there?
Please?
It's just across the strait.
That's not the sea out there.
It's a graveyard!
Oh dear... Oh...
The dogfish, risen from the icy depths
to take its tribute in blood and steel.
A monster the size o' 20 ships,
full of hunger and rage.
Oh please. That's just children's stories.
Captain,
my son is on the other side of the gulf.
He is performing tomorrow.
This is all I have in the world.
Take it. It's yours.
I just want to see him again.
Step and turn. And step and turn.
And look alive and step.
- Step. Step.
- Can I take a moment to rest?
No. Your tempo
is getting sloppier and sloppier.
No rest whatsoever.
Five minutes, please.
Three minutes.
Ooh.
Are you feeling okay, Pinocchio?
We're concerned.
You look so tired and worn out.
You need a good long rest.
And some trousers and another ear
wouldn't hurt either if you ask me.
Why not go home
and visit your papa for a while?
This is no place for you.
I can't.
I have to keep working
and working and sending money.
Yeah...
The truth is
Count Volpe is using you.
He hasn't sent a penny to your father.
What?
He keeps all the money for himself.
He doesn't care about you.
You're not his favorite.
Spazzatura is his favorite.
He's always been. He's a genius.
No! Count Volpe wouldn't lie to me.
I'm... I'm his star!
You're... You're all just jealous!
Ugh.
You think we will find him, Sebastian?
My Pinocchio?
I do. You see...
♪ My dear father loved to say ♪
♪ "Hop to the top of the day" ♪
♪ "The drops are easy to swallow" ♪
♪ My dear father loved to say ♪
Arrivederci!
♪ "Mop your tears
And mend your sorrows ♪
♪ To not drown yourself wishing..." ♪
Ha ha! It's me!
- Look, here he comes!
- It's him! It's him!
- It's Pinocchio! Let me talk to him.
- Thank you. Oh, you're very kind.
Not right now, I'm sorry.
You worthless...
...mangy, deranged ape!
Hmm?
What have you been saying to him, huh?
On the night before the big performance,
you could cost me everything!
You know who's coming? You have any idea?
I found you
at the bottom of that cage in the rain.
You were left there to die.
Nobody wanted you, and I saved you.
Rescued you!
I should've let you die!
Hey! Stop that!
Don't hurt him anymore!
This does not concern you, Pinocchio.
You're a star. Go rehearse your steps.
I demand that you stop!
You said it! I am the star of this show,
and I won't have
my costar treated this way.
And what's this I hear about
my papa not getting any money?
I might just go home
right now and ask him.
What do you think about that?
You can perform for Il Dolce yourself.
I think you misunderstand
our relationship, my little fire hazard.
I am the puppeteer.
- Uh!
- You are the puppet.
I am the master.
You are the sl*ve!
And you will do as I command
until your wooden body rots,
and I use you to warm my furnace!
Oh.
You may have no strings,
but I control you.
You obey me.
Capisce?
Spazzatura.
A son knows when his father is alive.
He will look for us, you'll see.
You have nothing to worry about.
Easy for you to say.
We are having dinner tonight.
We're so lucky!
Oh, Your Excellency!
I wrote this number just for you.
I like puppets.
- Hey, Spazzatura.
- Hmm?
You know, I think we ought to make
this big showstopper extra special
for the all-important Dolce tonight.
- Huh?
- I got some real good ideas.
I think
that will definitely work.
In bocca al lupo, my puppet.
Delight the Duce,
and I will shower you with glory.
Oh, we'll give him
a show he will never forget.
♪ I fight for the land ♪
♪ I fight oversea ♪
♪ For baby-poops-his-pants
Right there in front of me ♪
- ♪ The poop in hand, for fatherland ♪
- Poop?
Yes. Poop, Your Excellency.
♪ Il Duce, Il Duce
Go smell your farts and pray ♪
♪ Eat your boogers, your slime
You can also get mine ♪
- Poop! Poop! Poop! Poop!
- Ah!
♪ Like a bag of poop
Magnificent and free ♪
♪ You are farting
Farting in the men's lavatory ♪
♪ You're a poop! ♪
♪ We are young! ♪
♪ Eat caca, big baby
Eat caca, we are strong! ♪
These puppets, I do not like.
sh**t him!
And burn it all down.
Oh, hi! It's me!
Ugh, it's him again.
I cannot die!
We know.
I can't die.
I can't die!
Through the door.
Can you believe it?
I've escaped w*r, b*ll*ts, fire...
I was run over!
I could get k*lled a lot!
I'm the luckiest boy in the world.
As I see it,
you were charged with a terrible burden.
Huh? A burden?
No, I'm not.
That's a horrible thing to say to a boy.
Life can bring great suffering.
And eternal life
can bring eternal suffering.
Aw, it's not so bad as all that.
Yeah, I get a little b*at up every time,
but as soon as I get back,
I'm going home to my papa.
Ah, but, Pinocchio,
what if you don't see your father again?
Of course I will.
Why wouldn't I?
While you may have eternal life,
your friends,
your loved ones, they do not.
Every moment shared with them
may be the very last.
You never know how long
you have with someone until they're gone.
Huh? I... I don't understand.
Can... Can you tell me more?
Please? No! No! No!
Aha!
I knew it! You came back to life.
Hi, Candlewick.
Most of us, we have but one life
to give for our fatherland, but you...
you have no limit!
- Me?
- Yes!
You!
Follow my orders, learn to obey,
and you will be the perfect soldier.
But, my papa...
You'll return home a hero.
Any father would be proud of such a son.
We're here.
Wow!
What's all this?
The Elite m*llitary Project
for Special Patriotic Youth.
- What's an elite?
- We are.
We're gonna learn to be elite soldiers!
Learn? Like school?
To... To read and write
and do the mulplitication thingies?
You're funny.
Listen up.
They're reporting
hostile planes in the area.
But we will carry on
with the exercises tomorrow.
Anyone here afraid of the enemy?
- Uh-huh!
- No, sir!
Mm-mm.
Good.
You may be boys,
but you have the hearts of men.
Tomorrow, you train
for the glory of Italy!
Tomorrow, you will
make your fatherland proud.
Pinocchio. Pinocchio.
Yeah?
What do you think
my father meant about those planes?
I don't know.
I still don't really understand
what we're even doing here.
We're preparing to be soldiers. For w*r.
But my papa said w*r is bad.
That's 'cause he's a coward.
A coward? My papa?
Well, he's afraid of w*r, isn't he?
My father says if you're afraid to die
for your country, you're weak.
You're a coward.
Are you afraid?
I'm not afraid at all.
Well, neither am I. Or my papa.
- I love w*r.
- I love it more!
I love it twenty-four seven,
every day and anytime!
- So do I!
- Well, we'll see about that, won't we?
I'll show him I'm no coward.
I'll make him like me.
You know,
all fathers love their sons, but...
sometimes fathers feel despair,
like everyone else.
And they say things
they only think they mean in the moment.
But with time, they learn
they never really meant it at all.
And they may even call you ugly things
like a burden or a coward,
but inside...
they love you.
Are you scared?
Of dying?
Me? Nah.
I d*ed a couple times.
It was all right.
There's rabbits and card games
and a lot of sand.
Blue sand.
You're so weird.
No weirder than you, pal!
I'm... I'm glad you're here.
Me too.
And as with all great empires,
the destiny of Italy will be forged
in the strength of its youth.
Today, you'll get your first taste of w*r.
You'll form two teams.
In the center of the b*ttlefield
is a tower.
The first team to place their flag
at the top of the tower wins.
And remember,
no matter who is on the other team,
they are your enemy.
May the best man win
and bring glory to his team
and honor to us all.
r*fles are loaded with paint.
And the grenades, confetti.
Mark your k*ll, boys.
For Italia!
Hey!
Watch it!
W... Wait!
Come on, boys! Let's go!
- Go! Go!
- Charge!
- Watch out!
- Oh!
Faster! Follow me!
Take this.
You're both here. Why?
We both won, Father!
Oh. Is that so?
And how did you come
to that conclusion, may I ask?
It was a tie.
We both climbed up fast.
Very good, then.
Candlewick...
...sh**t the puppet.
But, Father...
this is a real g*n.
Take your glory, son!
sh**t the puppet!
Take your positions on the parapets.
Defend the center.
For Italy!
We are under att*ck!
I told you to sh**t the puppet!
No! I will not let you do this!
All my life, Father,
just trying to please you.
But I never will!
You were right.
I'm thin and weak and flimsy,
just like the wick of a candle.
Always afraid.
But even then, with all the fear I feel,
I can say no to you.
I can do that.
I'm not afraid to say no. Are you?
You filthy coward!
Yes, you are weak!
You are no son of mine!
Candlewick!
Puppet!
On your feet.
Time for the final lesson.
Now,
you will know what it is
to truly serve the fatherland!
Ah!
Ah! Pinocchio! Pinocchio!
Hello, my little rebel.
I've found you at last.
I lost everything.
And now you will too.
Huh?
Candlewick!
Bonjour, mon étoile.
No! Where's Candlewick?
Spazzatura! Please! Help me!
I'm all he has in this world,
the poor thing.
I have forgiven him.
But you! You squandered everything!
Give me that torch, Spazzatura!
Spazzatura!
Ah! Give me that, you mangy ape!
Let me go!
Is our contract worth nothing?
I'll do my part,
and you, you will burn.
Burn bright!
Like a star!
Hey, that's hot!
Worse than chocolate!
Ow! Ow!
Help!
Please! Help!
Help! Ow!
Help!
Ah!
Whoa!
How could you do this to me?
And for a puppet?
You loathsome lusus naturae!
You will betray me no more!
Spazzatura!
Spazzatura.
Will I ever see my papa again?
Huh?
Huh?
Look! An island!
Swim!
Whoa!
Huh?
Huh?
Ugh.
♪ And if you looked at me today ♪
♪ My heart would heal so fast ♪
Papa? Papa!
♪ And if you held me right away ♪
♪ I'd be complete at last ♪
♪ At last ♪
Papa!
You're alive!
Pinocchio!
Oh.
My Pinocchio.
Love hurts.
You'll be okay, Papa.
After you're feeling better,
we'll go right home. Okay?
No, Pinocchio, no.
There's no escape from this dreaded beast.
He comes seeking the warmth of the sun
every decade or so.
It will soon sink back to the depths
of the darkest, coldest ocean
where it dwells,
and it will drag us with him.
Oh my God! This is it!
Follow me!
Follow you? Where?
Up to the lighthouse and freedom!
The blow holes!
We can climb out through them!
But we... we'll never reach it.
It's... It's too far!
Pinocchio can help!
Pinocchio, look.
Listen. Listen.
Okay, we have to climb...
What is it, Pinocchio?
Oh, Papa, I hate you!
What? Well, what do you...
And I hate you too, Spazzatura.
And you, Sebastian J. Cricket!
Yes, I see!
Just this once, lie, m'boy!
Yes, that's it! Lie!
My name is Panucchio!
More, Pinocchio!
I love the smell of onions!
I love... I love w*r!
I wanna be trapped here
forever and ever and ever!
That's it!
Climb now! Everybody, climb!
Hurry! Come on!
What are you...
Oh.
Oh. Now steady on... Whoa!
Oh. Oh. Oh my word. Oh dear.
Whoa. Hold it. Whoa.
That's it!
Don't look down, Pinocchio!
Look at me!
Look at your papa!
Ah!
He's going to sneeze! Hurry!
Ah!
No! No! Ah!
I've got you, son.
Hold on, my boy!
- Ah!
- Help! Help!
Ah.
Uh-oh.
Whoa!
Oh no! Pinocchio!
Papa!
Papa!
It's coming for us! Quick!
Come on, Spazzatura. You can do it!
Ah!
Ah! Ah! Ah!
Yes, faster, Spazzatura!
Hold on!
Ah!
No, not now!
Send me back now! Please!
I need to go back to save my papa.
You know the rules, Pinocchio.
All the sand must fall
before you can return.
There's no time! He's dying!
Rules are rules,
and if we break them,
there are dire consequences.
If you were to go back now, so soon,
you would become mortal.
You might save Geppetto,
but you will die, Pinocchio,
and it will be your last life.
I don't care!
Send me back!
Do it!
Not me, wooden boy.
Break the rules. Break them.
If you're sure.
Now, go to your father, child.
And make the most of it.
Ah!
We made it!
I can't believe it!
Ah.
Pinocchio.
My boy. My boy.
Wake up, Pinocchio.
Like last time!
Get up!
You're fine. You... You...
You are here.
My dear son.
Can't you see me?
You're... You're alive.
You're so free. I...
I need you.
Son.
Master Geppetto.
I only wished to bring you joy.
And you did.
You did bring me joy.
Such terrible, terrible joy.
Please, bring him back to me.
To save you,
he became a real boy.
And real boys don't come back.
I know that.
I know! But...
It's not fair!
In this world,
you get what you give, remember?
And this boy gave...
Well, he gave everything he could!
You said if I should perform my duties
and make Pinocchio a good boy,
guide him into doing what is right,
you would concede me one wish.
I did.
And did you accomplish this task?
Okay! Fine. So maybe I didn't do so great.
Maybe I messed up a little or... a lot,
but, well, I tried my best,
and that's the best anyone can do.
Pinocchio taught me that.
I mean, I taught it to him,
and then he taught it straight back at me.
And you know why? Because...
Because he was good.
Well, then, noble cricket,
choose wisely.
Well, gosh darn it!
I wish him back to life!
Very well, then.
Little wooden boy made of pine,
may you rise with the sun
and wander the earth.
Be his son.
Fill his days with light...
...so he'll never be alone.
Pinocchio.
My child.
I was trying
to make you someone you were not.
So don't be Carlo or anyone else.
Be exactly who you are.
I...
I love you
exactly as you are.
Then I will be Pinocchio.
And you will be my papa.
Will that do?
That will do.
Aw.
Oh.
Life is such a wonderful gift.
And so it was
that we lived our lives.
Checkmate!
We never saw
the wood sprite again.
Geppetto aged.
Pinocchio didn't.
And in time, Geppetto left.
One winter morning,
Pinocchio found me by the window.
I wasn't moving anymore.
So he put me in a matchbox,
and he carries me still with him.
Right in his heart.
He ventured into the world.
And the world,
I believe, embraced him back.
I've not heard of him in quite a while.
Will he eventually die?
I think so.
And maybe that makes him a real boy.
What happens, happens.
And then, we are gone.
Are you gonna keep yappin',
or are you gonna play?
Do you mind?
I was recounting my life!
It was a good life!
Ah, good enough.
Hit it, boys!
♪ My dear father loved to say ♪
♪ "Hop to the top of the day" ♪
♪ "The drops are easy to swallow" ♪
♪ My dear father loved to say
"Mop your tears and mend your sorrows ♪
♪ To not drown your soul ♪
♪ Wishing for better tomorrows" ♪
♪ You want to think bright ♪
♪ You want to think right ♪
♪ A star falling down, down, down
Doesn't break the night ♪
♪ You want to think bright
Whatever you do ♪
♪ Shadows bring you down, down, down ♪
♪ Dimming all the light
As you try to climb ♪
♪ For life has a funny way
Of going round and round ♪
♪ On a ride it goes, one day side to side
One day upside down, down, down ♪
♪ You can make it right ♪
♪ Well worth a good fight ♪
♪ And if some days have downs and lows
Open your arms to better ♪
♪ Tomorrows ♪
♪ A floating tune is in the air ♪
♪ The simple things you care to share ♪
♪ A trace of light
A flock of sparrows ♪
♪ Anything high you dare to follow ♪
♪ Open your arms to better tomorrows ♪
♪ Tomorrows ♪
♪ You want to think bright ♪
♪ You want to think right ♪
♪ To let your heart sing, sing, sing ♪
♪ On a summer night ♪
♪ You want to think bright ♪
♪ Whatever you do ♪
♪ When the strings go zing, zing, zing ♪
♪ Fly high with the band
Just get up and swing ♪
♪ You can make it right ♪
♪ Well worth a good fight ♪
♪ And if some days have downs and lows ♪
♪ Open your arms to better ♪
♪ Tomorrows ♪
♪ Watercolors in May ♪
♪ Painting a purple sky ♪
♪ A pen, a line, a river ♪
♪ Strokes on a mandolin ♪
♪ Playing a gentle sigh ♪
♪ These are
The simple things that matter ♪
- ♪ You want to think bright ♪
- ♪ Bright ♪
- ♪ You want to think right ♪
- ♪ Right ♪
♪ And let your heart sing, sing, sing ♪
- ♪ On a summer night ♪
- ♪ Night ♪
♪ You want to think bright
Whatever you do ♪
♪ Teeny bells go ding, ding, ding ♪
♪ Laughing in the wind
Kite on a string ♪
♪ For life has a funny way
Of going 'round and 'round ♪
♪ On a ride it goes, one day side to side
One day upside down, down, down ♪
- ♪ And you make it right ♪
- ♪ Right ♪
- ♪ And your heart is bright ♪
- ♪ Bright ♪
♪ So let the world know how it goes ♪
♪ Open your arms to better ♪
♪ Open your arms ♪
♪ Open your arms to better ♪
♪ Tomorrows ♪
Guillermo del Toro's Pinocchio (2022)
Moderator: Maskath3