02x05 - An Englishman in Paris

[bunniefuu]

[upbeat music playing]

- Emily!
- Hi!

Come, I want you to see this.
My first menu.

Oh, my God! How exciting!
We have to take a picture.

All right, just pose next to it.

Okay...

[chuckles]

- Emily, perfect timing.
- Bonjour.

I got off the phone with Sylvie,
and as a favor to Maison Lavaux,

Savoir will be doing
the press for opening night.

We are? Oh, great.

And she decided to make it your job.

So, let's work hard
to get your man a lot of press, shall we?

[chuckles] Not my man.

We'll see you at Savoir tomorrow
to discuss the opening.

[Emily] Cool.

You've seen where I work,
now I'll see where you work.

Can't wait. [chuckles]

Bye.

- [knock on door]
- [door opens]

We're promoting
Chez Lavaux's opening night?

Is that a question or a statement?

As Maison Lavaux's account manager,
I was surprised to be the last to know.

But I'm excited to get started.

Well, now that I think about it, you might
not be the right person for the job.

Given your history with the chef.

Please, that is so in the past.
You know, like smoking in a French office.

Sylvie, the person
from Chopard is here about the event.

Oh, yeah, the Happy Hearts collection.

[gasps] I love those bracelets!

Come on, Sylvie, let's get happy.

[grunts]

Guests will arrive for cocktail hour
before the bateau-mouche departs

for a beautiful night
of dinner and dancing on the Seine.

Giving us the perfect launch
for your new collection.

Yes. The guests will have
the opportunity to try on the jewelry

while soaking in the romance
of the city from the water.

[in French] I love it.

[in English] These would be so perfect
for Valentine's Day back home.

[chuckles] God, romance
is so commercialized in America.

True. Valentine's Day is a huge holiday,

thanks, in large part,
to marketing companies, like this one.

Indeed, Americans
are very good at capitalizing on love.

And what about the music?

Music, yeah.

Mmm-hmm.

Julien, you're in touch with talent?

- Me?
- [Luc] Yeah.

It's under control.

The music was your responsibility!
You were supposed to book the DJ, no?

No, it was most definitely
your responsibility!

Stop, guys. Don't panic,
we'll just create a playlist.

"Put a Ring On It." "Diamonds."

"Diamonds and Pearls." "Gold Dust Woman."

Great. Now the music
is your responsibility.

Oh, God,
you actually had that in your head?

What about live music?
It could be more romantic. Just a thought.

That would be amazing,
but we don't have the budget.

Budget may not be an issue.

Are you free for lunch?

Mmm.

[in French] One, two, three, four...

[singing in French]

[crowd cheering and clapping]

[groans in delight] She's so good, right?

Yeah, I'm sorry, I'm a little distracted
by the hot man fingering the strings.

[Emily] Excuse me?

[Julien] The guitar player.

I think they'd be perfect
for our Chopard Happy Hearts party.

Yeah, well, I've got a heart-on right now.

- Do you even know what you're saying?
- I do.

Hi!

[kisses]

- How was it?
- You were fabulous.

And so are you! I'm Mindy.

Julien.

A-ha. Enchantée.
Emily has told me so much about you.

And Emily told me you were a drag queen.

Uh, so much gets lost
in translation. [laughs]

Anyway, I'd introduce you to the band,

but Étienne's boyfriend just dumped him,
so Benoît is comforting him between sets.

Boyfriend? Is Étienne the hot guitarist?

No. That's Benoît.

But I think he's single too.
What, are you down?

- Down, up, side to side.
- He'd probably be into that.

Well, maybe you can introduce them
on a bateau-mouche for our Chopard event?

Is that an invitation or a job offer?

- Yes and yes.
- Oh, we're so in!

[gasps] The boys are going to love that.
I've always wanted to headline a cruise.

- Oh, it's not really a...
- [shushes]

[in French] You'll each be writing
a profile of your partner.

Who they are, what they do,
why they are here in Paris.

This is an excellent exercise to allow you
to master your descriptive vocabulary,

and get to know your partner better.

We will present
the profiles in the next class.

Excellent week to all and good work.

[in English] Okay. So should we
just get this out of the way?

Excuse me?

The assignment?
Were you even paying attention?

- We're supposed to interview each other.
- [sighs in exasperation]

Fine. I'm English, obviously.
Born and raised in London.

I like football, and I work at a bank.
What else is there that you need to know?

What do you do there?

I specialize in financial services
concerning the post-Brexit transition.

Oof.

Settle down, it's very exciting stuff.

I never really understood
the meaning of Brexit.

Well, it's a combination
of words. "Britain" and "Exit."

[gasps] No way. Um, I meant
more like on a practical level.

Well, to be honest,
I'm not too sure anybody really does.

Practically or otherwise.

Megxit, I get.

[laughs]

Yeah. Everyone understands that.

[chuckles]

- We good?
- Um...

Well, no, that's barely even three verbs,
and you haven't even interviewed me!

Emily Cooper, American,
loves iced lattes, the beach...

And what? Curling up with a good book.

Let's think. Gemini.

- Gemini? As if.
- [laughs] I nailed the rest, right?

No. Can you please
just take this seriously?

Okay? Why are you even
in this class if you aren't going to try?

Well, unfortunately,
it's a requirement of my company.

I'm not, however, required to try.

I mean, this is basically
the linguistic equivalent

of traffic school.

Okay. Well, it means
a little more than that to me.

And since you're stuck with me,
make an effort.

- There is a little cafe downstairs...
- No, I'm busy tonight.

And mostly because
I don't feel like going to a cafe.

I'm all Frenched out for the day.

Okay. I hate to break it to you,
but we're in France.

They pretty much speak French everywhere.

You'd be surprised.
I'll text you when I'm free.

See you later, Cooper.

[French pop song playing]

Oh. Hi.

So this is where you work.

You're early.

I was a bit nervous I'd be late.
This is a big deal for me.

A marketing firm behind
my restaurant opening. I mean...

Chef Gabriel. Nice to see you again.

We are all so excited
to be handling your opening.

Okay, that one came out wrong. [chuckles]

So to recap.
Phase 1 is creating awareness.

I plan to direct social content
from Maison Lavaux's Instagram,

which has increased 30% since I started,
to the newly launched Chez Lavaux account.

That will help build excitement
for the restaurant's debut.

What?

Um, nothing. It's great.

I just never...

Please continue.

Yeah, but not for much longer, please.

Okay. So, um, cards on the table,
this is my first restaurant account,

so just thinking out loud, um,
would you prefer a soft opening

to get the kitchen up to speed,
or do you want to start with a bang?

Bang!

In my opinion.

We don't want our customers
coming to a dress rehearsal, do we?

- Good point, yeah, probably not.
- Okay, so that's decided.

The last thing to discuss though
is building more content on social.

So, Gabriel, I'm gonna have
to come to the restaurant

and get some behind-the-scenes footage
of you at work.

Of course. You're welcome any time.

Emily. Perhaps you'd like to show them out
the very scenic back staircase?

- Why would I do that?
- Because...

[in French] Ah, Champère, welcome!

[laughing]

Gabriel!

[in English] What are you doing here?

Visiting from Normandy?

[hesitates] I...

Actually, no, I never went to Normandy.

Uh, Antoine here backed me up
in a restaurant in Paris.

That's fantastic! I'm so proud of you.

I guess that explains
why you didn't want our money.

- Nice to meet you, Antoine.
- Enchanté.

We represent Antoine's firm,
Maison Lavaux,

so naturally we're also working
with the restaurant.

Naturally.

Well, it was so good to see you all.

[chuckles nervously] Antoine, shall we?

[in French] Ladies and gentlemen...

[in English] Such a pleasure.
Luc will take it from here.

Sure, please follow me.

[in French] This is so exciting!

Camille, why didn't you tell us
about Gabriel's restaurant?

Because we broke up.

- What? I didn't know that.
- Start the meeting.

Why didn't you tell us sooner?

Because I didn't want
to hear, "I told you so."

You never liked him.

That's not true at all.
I like him very much.

- I just thought he was a little stubborn.
- That's for sure.

I propose to start with Champère himself.

[laughs]

- I love it.
- Excuse me, uh, why don't we have Emily?

She's the reason we're here.

You can rest assured
that these are her ideas.

Emily is not on the account anymore.

[gasps] Really?

Why not?

There's something else I didn't tell you.

[sighs]

Well, it's no surprise.

She came down to chateau,
and she banged your 17-year-old brother.

In a long-term relationship, sh*t happens.

Huh, sweetie?

It's a test,

and if you can get through it,
you'll wind up closer.

Dad, I don't think so.

Okay. Do you still love him?

Um...

I hate to admit it, but I believe I do.

So I'm gonna help you, but you listen
to me and do exactly as I say.

[upbeat music playing]

[in English] Well, Alfie,
I'm very impressed.

You've found
the least Parisian place in all of Paris

for us to do our French class assignment.

What can I say?

I like the fact I can order
a coffee in English and no one cares.

- [Emily] Can I ask you a question?
- Yeah, sure.

Why are you in Paris
if you hate it so much?

Well, one, for work, as I've said.

And two, I don't hate it.
I just don't buy into the hype.

Paris is built on a fantasy,

and I just happen
to be able to see right through it.

It's not all fantasy.

Couples literally come here
to get engaged.

It's "the City of Love" for a reason.

Yeah, and that reason
is completely manufactured.

This place is portrayed as this
end-all-be-all of romantic settings

in books, movies, and Instagram, right?

But the reality is,
choking on cigarette smoke,

sidewalks covered in dog sh*t,
and tourist traps.

Okay, well, it's also a big city.

Exactly. Paris is full of traffic
and overpriced restaurants.

And scam artists
just like any other big city.

And I'm sure London is just the same.

London is up-front about what it is.

I mean, London doesn't pretend
to be something it's not.

Meanwhile, Paris' reputation
is all a facade. Smoke and mirrors.

It's selling you something
that's not real.

I think it's all in
how you decide to look at it.

- Right. [laughs]
- Come on, let's get these coffees to go.

This whole concept
of "the City of Love" was probably created

by an American marketing executive
in town on business.

Alfie, I am
an American marketing executive.

You're joking.

I assumed you were here as some kind
of American expat on a fantasy gap year.

I work in a marketing firm
that specializes in luxury goods.

In fact, right now,
I'm running point on an event for Chopard

that is centered
on the very idea of Parisian romance.

Right. You prove my point
with every word you say.

Ugh! So what if marketing capitalizes
on romance, okay?

Being a romantic and a realist
are not mutually exclusive.

My whole job
is centered on finding a balance.

- Our bateau-mouche party for Chopard...
- [scoffs]

"Bateau-mouche"?
Is that what passes as romance these days?

Okay then.

- [cell phone chimes]
- Hold that.

Oh. Sorry, love, office needs me.

I have a real job
to get to myself, you know?

Yeah, you operate a love boat.
I heard you the first time.

Look, I'm free tomorrow.

And I'm not! You'll just have
to come to the bateau-mouche!

Brilliant. Send me the details.

Open bar, yeah?

We're not staying for the whole party!

Just come 20 minutes before!

[instrumental music playing]

[camera beeps]

Was that good?

- Maybe loosen up a little. Um, and smile?
- Okay.

Uh... [chuckles]

While I'm cutting squash? It feels weird.

Well, take another sip then.

Okay.

- Okay, ready?
- Okay. Yeah.

- Ready.
- Okay. Go!

[upbeat music playing]

No. You have to cut that bit.

- I look ridiculous on this one.
- No!

- I think you look great. It was candid!
- Come on, no, please.

- Please. Delete it.
- No!

- Delete it.
- It's my account! You have to trust me.

- It's my face.
- You have to trust me.

[laughing]

So... did you get everything you want?

["Nuit" playing]

[woman in French]
Excuse me, is anyone here?

Hi, sorry. I'm here for the interview.

[in English] Right. The bartender job.

- Has the position been filled?
- No. I was just...

here to get some content for social.

And I think we got everything we needed.

- Uh, almost.
- Yeah. Happy...

[hesitates] Happy interview.

[speaking indistinctly]

["Nuit" continues playing]

I see engagement
is high in the Chez Lavaux account.

Bravo, Emily.

You got some good content with your chef.

He's not my chef. He's just a friend.

Oh, please, I used to be a photographer,

and I can tell
when you're in love with your subject.

It's complicated.

And I'm only in Paris for a year.

Emily.

You've got the rest of your life
to be as dull as you wish,

but while you're here, fall in love,

make mistakes,
leave a disastrous trail in your wake.

If you're going to do Paris
for one year, for God's sake, do it right!

I'm not sure
that Camille would agree with that.

That may not be the issue you think it is.

What are you talking about?

Her mother called, and they want you back
on the Champère account.

[cell phone chimes]

["My Blood Runs Cold" playing]

Emily! I'm sorry I'm late.

It's okay.

[gasps] I'm sorry. Oh, I'm sorry.

Relax, it's okay.

[Emily chuckles]

[Emily] Pardon.

Oops.

- [Camille clears throat]
- [Emily] Merci.

Thank you for texting me.

- I'm so happy to see you.
- I'm so happy to see you.

So, I've had the time
to think about everything.

And I think I know what happened.

You thought Gabriel and I broke up,

he was leaving Paris,
and maybe you were seduced by the moment.

So many stranger things
have happened in Paris.

Exactly. Yeah. I would never have...

If I'd thought
that you two were still together.

Yeah, I just wish you had told me
from the start. As my friend.

I regret that I didn't. Really.

Anyway, my family is so happy
that you're back on the account.

You came up with this brilliant idea,
and we don't want to do it without you.

[chuckles] Thank you. I am so relieved,

and, believe me, I will work
so hard to make it a huge success.

I know you will.

So, to a fresh start?

Santé to that.

And let's not ever let a man
come between us again.

No. Never.

Let's make a pact.
Neither of us will ever be with Gabriel.

A pact? You don't have
to worry about me and Gabriel.

So you agree then?

- Yeah. Of course.
- Let's drink on it.

To never being with Gabriel.

To never being with Gabriel.

[upbeat music playing]

You made a pact?

Like an actual pact?

I thought that only countries at w*r
or middle-school girls did that formally.

And grown women who want to stay friends.

She's not wrong. Without it,
it would be mutually assured destruction.

With Gabriel as collateral damage.

Are you telling him about this?

No, and I never will.

Fine.

Well, why don't you
play matchmaker with me instead?

Should we introduce Benoît
and Julien before or after the set?

Definitely after. I don't want
anyone distracted until you finish.

Oh.

By the way,
we never discussed the fee for the night.

Oh, well, we never discussed
your rent here either.

Ah! Okay, um, good point.
Why don't we call it even?

Deal.

♪ A kiss on the hand
May be quite continental ♪

♪ But diamonds are a girl's best friend ♪

♪ A kiss may be grand ♪

♪ But it won't pay the rental
On your humble flat ♪

♪ Or help you at the automat ♪

♪ Men grow cold as girls grow old ♪

♪ And we all lose our charms in the end ♪

♪ But square cut or pear shaped
These rocks don't lose their shape ♪

♪ Diamonds are a girl's best friend! ♪

♪ But stiff-backed or stiff knees ♪

♪ You stand straight at Tiffany's ♪

♪ Diamonds ♪

♪ Diamonds ♪

♪ I don't need rhinestones ♪

♪ But diamonds are a girl's best... ♪

♪ Best friend ♪

[crowd cheering and clapping]

[in French] Thanks, everyone.

We'll be back in a moment
with another song.

Merci!

[in English] You sound incredible tonight.

I mean, you always do.
But especially tonight.

Thanks. Ooh, I actually
wanna introduce you to someone.

- Me? Really?
- Yeah. I think you'll totally hit it off.

Bonsoir.

Julien, this is Benoît,
our guitarist. Benoît, Julien.

Hey.

- He thinks you're totally hot.
- Oh.

- Mindy!
- What?

I thought I'd cut to the chase.
Save you guys the trouble.

- Okay, and I think you're totally hot.
- What?

I thought I'd cut to the chase.
Save us the trouble.

[laughs]

Wait, you're straight?

[laughs drily] Merde.

Emily Cooper.

I said a drink before.

Now you're stuck
on the love boat for the whole party.

Fine.

I can spend the next two hours
telling you every little thing about me.

But I'm doing it in English.

Your whole anti-French thing
is getting pretty old.

The way I see it,
I'm only here temporarily.

Why bother committing
to something that can't last?

You have a point there.

[Emily sighs]

That gets me every time.

All right.

Paris from this angle, at night,

you got me there, Cooper.

Hmm.

- Yeah, but, I'm still not learning French.
- [tuts]

[scoffs]

[both laughing]

What's wrong?

Oh.

You okay?

Hey. What are you doing?

Ripping off the Band-Aid.

Em.

Are you here to finish what we started?

Kind of.

What's wrong?

What's wrong is...

I'm only in Paris for a year.

It's always been the deal,
and I don't want us to start something

that we can't continue.

This, you and me,
it's a... It's a fantasy. It's a...

- A Paris fantasy.
- Hey, hey, hey.

It's not a fantasy to me.

Just think about the reality of us.

- [hesitates]
- No. Just think. Okay?

We get together and then what, huh?

What happens after the year is up?

Because we both know
that you're not moving to Chicago,

and I'm not staying in Paris.

Then what?

And I'm not going to fall in love with you
when we have an expiration date.

It's just going to hurt us both.

If you say so.

If you'll excuse me,
I have a restaurant to open.

[sighs]

["Le besoin de la nuit" playing]

[theme music playing]