07x36 - Free Perk

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Teen Titans Go!". Aired: April 23, 2013 – present.*
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Animated series that follows the adventures of the young Titans: Beast Boy, Robin, Cyborg, Raven and Starfire.
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07x36 - Free Perk

Post by bunniefuu »

Go! T-E-E-N T-I-T-A-N-S Teen Titans, let's go Teen Titans, go Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

I feel terrible, yo.

Brother Blood sure put up a mean fight this time.

Ahh! This circuits in my face are aching.

Ooh, good news, Titans! We've just logged enough hours with the Heroes Union to qualify for a free perk.

- Ooh! Is it free burritos? - No, no, Beast Boy.

It's health insurance.

Oh, mans, I thought it was going to be something good.

It is good.

But what is the health insurance, Robin? I'm so glad you asked, Star.

Health insurance is an agreement between you and the insurance company that you will pay them a certain amount of money each month which is known as the premium.

And in exchange, they will help cover the cost of your future medical bills.

So we have to pay for this health insurance? I thought you said it was a perk.

The perk is that you get to pay for it.

Oh, I the understand.

We pay the money to the insurance company, and then we get to see the doctor for free.

Mm, not quite.

You still have to pay a deductible.

Uh, what's a duck sitting on a table gots to do with it? Literally nothing.

A deductible is simply the amount of money you have to pay out of pocket for health care services before your insurance plan starts to pay.

Man, this free perk is starting to sound real expensive.

You made the health insurance sound like the blessing.

Feels more like a curse.

I knew this would be tough, so I brought along an expert on medical insurance to help me explain.

Everyone meet Benny.

Hi, everybody, I'm Benny the badger.

Your friendly explanation of benefits.

Oh, he is the adorable.

- Now that's a face I can trust.

- Duh.

Yo, Benny.

What's up with this health insurance biz? Well, guys, when you get an owie, your good friends at the insurance company will do everything they can to make you all better.

Finally! Someone's making sense.

Tell us more, Benny.

Once you're all fixed up, you can get back to the fun things in life.

Like flying kites, miniature golf and spending time with the people you love.

Whoa, I loves kites! And I enjoy the golf that is the teeny tiny miniature.

But you have to do your part, too! By staying away from all the bad stuff, listed here in my handy-dandy risk assessment book.

You know, bad stuff! Like getting zapped by aliens.

Being crushed by a robot.

Existing! And so much more.

Therefore, as long as you avoid risky situations, you don't have to worry about paying a bunch of money for medical expenses.

But that's not practical.

Yeah, our jobs as superheroes put us in risky situations all the time.

I thinks we should just forget about this health insurance nonsense and get on with our lives! Fine, go head, but without an insurance plan to help you cover the massive cost of a medical emergency, you're only one injury away from being plunged into soul-crushing debt, which will cause you to lose everything.

Your house, your car, the clothes on your back, everything! Everything? No, man, I don't want to lose the T car.

And if we lose our clothes, our bum-bums will be exposed.

Ugh! We clearly need to sign up for this health insurance so we can protect ourselves.

Then hand over the money for your premiums! Then you'll be on your way to enrolling in your very own insurance plan.

Here.

Take of the money.

Yeah.

Give me some of that good health insurance, too, yo.

Looks like my work here is done.

Take care, Titans, and stay safe.

- Bye, Benny.

- My man.

Congratulations, Titans.

You're all insured.

Oh! Thank the goodness we had Benny to explain it to us.

Yeah, Robin just confused us with his blah-blidity-blah-blah wordy words.

Crime alert! Cinderblock is causing chaos downtown.

We've got to get there as fast as possible.

Titans, go! Can't you drive any faster? Uh-uh! I don't want to get into a crash.

Have to pay a bunch of medical bills.

You crazy? And according to this, driving more than ten miles an hour increases our chance of injury by 20%.

Dude, you better slow down, bro.

Come on.

Come on, come on, come on, come on.

- Okay, Titans, let's move! - Hold on! I still need to put on the parking brake.

Yeah, runaway cars account for five percent of all hospital visits.

Whatever! Are we good? Uh, yep.

Great.

Now let's take him down! Titans, go! Wait! This place is not the safe.

There are the loose nails, the oil slicks, and the improperly grounded electrical wires.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

The numerous safety hazards means I might has to pay a lots of money to that duck on the table.

I am sitting this one out.

- Me, too.

- Fine.

Looks like it's all up to me.

Ouch! Aah! Stop! Little help here! - No way, bro.

- We are the good.

Ow, ow, ow! My arm.

This is terrible, Robin's really eating through his deductible.

I mean, his bill will be enormous.

Titans, listen, we're already paying a ton of money for our premiums.

Don't you think we should at least get our money's worth from our insurance plan? It does seem like the big waste.

I bet if we're careful, we can take Cinderblock down without racking up a lot of medical bills.

And, this gives us a 66% chance of surviving.

I likes them odds, mama.

Now let's get that rocky fool! We did it! And without incurring the expensive medical procedures.

I'd say we definitely got our money's worth.

Surely we can afford a few broken limbs.

Mm.

And I am loving this free apple juice.

Check it out.

I's a duck, and I's now on a table.

Ain't life funny? We did well, Titans, and we can rest easy knowing that all our expenses will be covered by our top-rated health insurance.

What is the matter, Robin? We just got a huge bill from a hospital.

It says none of our treatment will be covered by our insurance plan.

This can't be happening! Our health insurance stinks.

We should demands to speak to a manager.

There's an insurance rep right here in the hospital.

I think it's time we pay them a little visit.

It is the so very dark down here in the hospital basement.

It's giving me the creeps, yo.

This is it, Titans, This doesn't look anything like the caring, nurturing institution Benny told us about.

I am the mighty insurance representative.

Now, what brings you pathetic subscribers to my lair? We demand to know why you won't cover our medical bills! Ah, yes, about that.

You haven't reached the kajillion dollar limit on your deductible.

So the entire bill is your responsibility! That's messed up, yo.

I see what's going on here.

You're trying to slither your way out of covering our bill.

You can't just take our money and leave us without any coverage.

You are the dishonorable cheater! Look, you made an agreement to help us cover our medical bills, and we demand that you honor it.

Um, let me quote paragraph seven, section 6B, when I say, "Make me!" I didn't want it to come to this, but it looks like we're going to have to fight the insurance company.

Titans! Dispute the bill.

You fools! No one fights the insurance company and wins! He's right.

He's too strong.

Ooh, I bet I can help out! Benny! I know a way to best this insurance snake, but it involves me b*ating you all senseless.

I'll do anything this guy says.

Okay, then let's go! Take that! And this! What What are you doing? b*ating you at your own game.

We are going to rack up so many injuries, that we'll exceed our high deductible, and stick you with a mountain of medical bills.

Stop! Do you know how much a fractured pelvis costs? Please, don't! That's going to require X-rays.

Now it's your turn, buddy.

Ow, ow, ow! No! Your injuries have reached the kajillion dollar limit, which forces me to pay up! We did it! We b*at the insurance company! The joy.

Go, team.

- That's what's up.

- Great job, guys! Guys? Guys!
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