03x03 - Surviving Siegfried

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "All Creatures Great and Small". Aired: 1 September 2020 – present.*
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Based on a series of books- series revolves around a trio of veterinary surgeons working in the Yorkshire Dales beginning in 1937.
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03x03 - Surviving Siegfried

Post by bunniefuu »

[HORSE NEIGHS]

Hold, men.

Captain Farnon?

Sounds like it's in pain.

[HORSE WAILS]

Let's have a look.

The officer's bought it. Still

holding the reins, though.

[HORSE WAILS]

It's all right, boy.

Sh.

Deep lacerations, some

muscle damage.

Probably torn going through

barbed wire.

He's a beautiful horse.

Captain!

Don't panic, Turner,

the front line's a hundred yards

beyond that ridge.

Is that supposed to reassure us?

We'll be quick.

Come on, Maurice.

Let's get him patched up, see if we

can take him back with us.

Gas, gas, gas! Mask on, Turner!

The horses!

Put your mask on, Turner!

Damn it! Put your mask on!

The animal always comes first!

Maurice, are you all right?

Fine!

Turner? Turner!

Mr. Farnon?

Mr. Farnon?

Hmm?

Are we still in

the land of the living?

It seems so, yes.

Major Sebright Saunders called.

Got an horse needs seeing to.

Right.

Look at the state of this place.

It's a bloody disgrace.

Long night?

Exhausting.

Take a seat. Audrey's left your

breakfast in the oven.

Tristan!

I was never here.

Either of you seen that

errant brother of mine?

Um, no. I've been out on call.

Helen?

He's hiding in the pantry.

Ah. There it is.

Good morning, Siegfried.

Do you know what this is?

I dare you to say a bottle.

I bloody dare you.

Hydrogen Cyanide.

Enough to k*ll half the district.

And do you know what this is?

Antiseptic.

I found them together

on the same shelf.

Your slap dash mismanagement of

the dispensary could very well

have caused the death of

countless innocent animals

or people, for that matter.

And we're assuming this is my

mistake because?

There's no need for us to get to

the who's and how-fors

Oh, because it usually is!

Poisons are always to be kept

correctly labelled and separately.

I want you to go through that

dispensary from top to bottom and

get it into some kind of order.

Yes, Siegfried.

A proper inventory.

You really must start taking

more responsibility.

I'm trying.

You're extremely trying.

Shall we not put the deadly poison

on the breakfast table?

Everything in its proper place.

Then there's no confusion.

And, James, I really wish you

wouldn't clutter up the place

with piles of TB testing forms.

I grow tired of endlessly

clearing up after you all.

[DOOR CLOSES]

You know, in this house, we tend to

have a united front when it comes

to matters concerning my brother.

Where's the fun in that?

Your time will come,

then you'll see.

Here.

Before someone keels over.

Mr. Cranford called.

Dead cow.

Oh, dear.

What did it die from?

I imagine that's what

he wants you to tell him.

Eat up.

I need to get up to the farm.

Mrs. Beck, we can't do it

for as little as that.

Mr. Herriot, I never thought you

were such an 'eartless man.

I can assure you I'm not being

in the least bit heartless.

If you're worried about your cat

getting pregnant again,

then the only course of action

is to have her spayed.

Fair enough.

We'll call it ten shillings.

I just cannot carry out a major

operation for ten shillings.

I thought you would've done it for a

poor widder woman like me.

We often offer reduced rates for

people who can't afford to pay,

but this is what we call a

luxury operation.

Luxury?

Our Georgina keeps

having these kittens.

I can't sleep wondering

when the next lot's coming.

And me a poor widder woman.

All right, ten shillings.

Just this once.

How would tomorrow afternoon be?

Grand.

You can collect her at one o'clock.

No, Mrs. Beck, you need to

That told her.

Second night in a row

you've been out on call.

Comes with the job.

With your job.

Tristan's not ready to go

on night calls by himself.

You think I'm too soft.

Siegfried doesn't do half

the night calls you do.

I'm the junior partner.

I've got to expect to do more.

And Tristan doesn't do any at all.

You should speak to Siegfried about

sharing the load a bit more equally.

Or you'll wear yourself out.

I know, and I will.

When the time's right.

Right.

I'll see you later.

Helen, have you asked your dad if

he'll take us up on the TB testing?

Only I'm struggling to convince

the farmers to go along with it.

When the time's right.

Major, how are you?

A little gouty, truth be told.

Can't be helped.

The price of living well.

I suppose you heard

about Sergeant Oliver.

Crying shame.

He was a good soldier.

And an even better man.

Mm.

Morning.

This the patient?

Aye. That's the bugger.

Sired by Donard's Hill.

His mother was Three Leaf Clover.

The finest breeding.

How long have you had him?

Three months now.

Goes like the proverbial off a

shovel with no rider on him.

Soon as you try to get

a jockey in the saddle,

well, you'll see for yourself.

George! if you don't mind?

- There's really no need

- Nonsense. That's what he's paid for. Come on.

Go on, up you get.

I'll tell your mother

you d*ed a hero's death.

Go on. Get up there, man!

This really isn't necessary.

I don't know.

There's definitely

something wrong with him.

With him too now.

Take the saddle off, please.

Where was he before you?

Ireland.

Brought him over about a month ago.

I saw him run Curragh.

There was none of this trouble.

Did anyone make

the journey over with him?

I did. Got a kick in t'back

for my pleasure 'an all.

Easy boy. Easy, easy, easy.

I'm not going to hurt you.

What say you, Farnon?

He's absolutely wonderful.

And no problems on the boat over?

Not particularly.

A tad rough perhaps.

Rough?

Ah, well, high seas

don't agree with all these animals.

Maybe he lost his land legs.

I can't find anything

physically wrong with him.

I suspect the problem

is psychological.

As you know, I have some experience

transporting horses overseas.

They need particular care.

Can he be fixed?

Animals, like people,

cannot simply be tinkered with

and fixed like a wristwatch.

If he's no use for riding,

I can't afford to keep him.

Look, you were always

something of a horse man,

I thought perhaps

you could break him?

I'd say he's already broken.

Our job is to put him back

together again.

What's his name?

River.

Hello, River.

[RIVER NEIGHS]

I have to get to know the patient

if I've any hope of treating him.

You're a braver man than I.

Shhh. Sh.

Easy now.

You're all right, fella. Come on.

I'm not going to hurt you.

River.

All I want is his eyes.

At the moment

he's not looking at me.

He's not looking at anything.

Adrenaline's pouring into his veins.

He's in a state of absolute panic.

Fight or flight?

Well, this one chooses to fight.

It's all driven by fear.

It's what makes him

lash out the way he does.

I'm not going to hurt you.

You're all right.

You're all right. You're safe.

You're safe.

You're safe.

Look into my eyes.

Look into my eyes.

Ow.

You tried, Farnon.

Good for nowt now but dog food.

Good morning, Madam.

Always a pleasure.

I'd rather you kept

your paws off my petunias,

if you don't mind, Mr. Barge.

What on earth

The only way to dig out the weed is

to take hold of it by the root.

Right.

I half expected you to be feet up

doing the crossword.

Something you wanted?

Mr. Barge is here.

Oh.

Ah, good morning.

Good morning.

Now what medicinal wonders

do you have for us today then?

Well, sir, if you'd like

to peruse our brochure,

you'll find a cure for all ills.

Shouldn't you wait for Mr. Farnon

before you start?

Siegfried charged me

with minding the stock, Mrs. H.

And I'm more than up to the task.

Anything else?

Just holler

if you need a spade

to dig that grave of yours.

She does have a sense of humour.

Bloomin' well need one to work here.

Well, we'd better have

a couple dozen electuaries.

And we are running

a little low on fever drinks,

so a few boxes of those.

Very good, Mr. Farnon.

Will that be all?

I believe so,

unless you've something

new to tempt us with.

Funny you should say.

Introducing Cargill's SoothAway.

Available in pill or

liquid form for injection.

It's a calming sedative,

mollifying the most

irascible of patients.

Rendering agitated animals almost

immediately amenable.

I don't suppose

it works on humans?

No, Mr. Farnon,

I'm sorry but my wares aren't

licensed for human consumption.

No matter. We'll take two boxes.

Very good, Sir.

Thunderclap.

Dead cow.

What was that?

It were lightning that k*lled her.

Not now.

Last night.

There was no storm last night.

Aye, not down were you live.

But up here,

terrible storm.

Thunderclap, lightning flash,

dead cow.

Then there's the presentation.

It d*ed in convulsions.

You can see where

its feet kicked in the grass.

Aye, well, it were lightning that

give it convulsions, won't it?

I have to say, I doubt it,

Mr. Cranford.

You see, one of the signs of a

lightning strike is that

the beast has fallen without

a struggle.

I really think we ought to do

a postmortem to make sure.

Are you saying I'm up to

summat I shouldn't be up to?

Not at all

You know there's folk round here

saying that you're trying

to get farmers to sign up

to this 'ere TB test.

It's in everybody's best interests.

Well, maybe I'll bring that up next

time I chair local Farmers' Union then.

Listen, lad, just sign

the certificate.

Insurance company'll pay up.

It were lightning.

I'm afraid I can't diagnose that as

the cause of death at this stage.

We'll take her to Mallock's tomorrow

for a postmortem and we can know for sure.

Bloody stuff and nonsense.

James is struggling to get folks

signed up for testing.

Oh, well.

When it costs them their herd and

government won't pay

what animal's worth,

what do you expect?

I know.

Is that it?

You're not going to bend

me ear until I give in?

I said I'd ask.

It's a tough one.

It is, aye.

But I'll think on it.

Come on, River.

I'm not giving up on you.

Come on, then.

Good.

You're seeing me now, aren't you?

Nothing to be afraid of here.

That's it.

One step at a time.

That's it.

One step at a time.

That's it.

Will you try to get

a saddle on him now?

Not today.

He's tired.

The way he's moving his head

tells me he's had enough.

He's deeply disturbed.

Undoing the damage will take time.

But we'll try.

Don't leave him alone tonight.

Find another horse,

one of your most amenable,

and put them in together

in one of the larger stables.

Did you get the chance

to speak to your dad today?

He says he'll think about it.

It's hard for farmers.

They spend decades

building up their herds.

One positive test and

that could all be undone.

If infected milk's consumed,

it can lead to people dying.

Surely you can see

that's more important?

I just don't think it's as

black and white as you see it.

I don't want to row about it.

We're not.

One more, sir.

I'll send you both a copy.

Easy, boy.

Easy.

How is Vonolel getting on, Captain?

Wound's healed.

Physically speaking,

he'll make a full recovery.

No accounting for

the damage we can't see.

Him and me both.

I was at the hospital.

Turner's bed's empty.

He's gone.

I'll write to his mother.

I should do it.

You've done enough already.

Anything else?

No, sir.

Major Sebright Saunders is here.

Fresh water for Orpheus.

Yes, sir.

I've just been informed that

at five o'clock this morning,

Germany signed an Armistice.

At the toll of one o'clock,

the w*r will be over.

I'm sorry.

It's over?

We're going home.

I'd like you to travel

with Orpheus personally

to make sure no harm comes to him.

Certainly, sir, once

I've organised everything here,

I'll make arrangements.

How soon can you and

your men be ready to leave?

Oh, well, we'll need

resupplying for the journey back.

Not just for the men.

We need adequate

provisions for the horses too.

That won't be necessary.

Sir, we've hundreds of horses here,

tens of thousands more

across the Front.

They'll need feeding and watering.

They won't, actually.

I'm not sure I understand.

It's an unnecessary cost.

They've been offered to

the Belgians and the French.

I've arranged for our horses

to be picked up tomorrow.

And they'd rather not have

to transport them alive.

I'm sorry.

They need to be put down.

We're going to sh**t them?

Order someone from your company

to do it if you've no stomach for it.

Sergeant, horse.

They carried our men into battle.

They fought at our side.

I sympathise with the

sentiment, Farnon,

but the cost of bringing

them back far outweighs

what we'd get for them at home.

Men d*ed for them.

My men.

We have our orders.

I brought you some dinner.

Oh, thank you, Mrs. Hall.

Um, here, please.

Ooh, is that from your

treasure chest?

Yes, just some notes I made when I

was in the Army Veterinary Corps.

How'd it go with the Major's horse?

Well, he's obviously been through

some fairly serious trials.

I hope that time will see him right.

It'll heal any wound.

Can't do away with the scar, though.

This looks delicious.

I'll leave you to it.

He took everything out.

He were absolutely meticulous.

What's this?

My head felt like it had barely hit

the pillow last night before the

phone woke me up.

Ouch. Three nights in a row.

Hard lines, Jim.

Did you not hear it, Triss?

Thankfully not.

I've always been blessed to have the

sleep of the dead.

After several pints of brew.

All medicinal, Mrs. H.

Care to explain?

Ah, yes, new sedative.

Mr. Barge assures me

that it'll calm

even the most

agitated of animals.

So, now you're wasting my

hard-earned money on snake-oil.

The accompanying literature

was very persuasive.

And I thought it might come in handy

with that horse of yours.

Yes, I took what you said about

responsibility on board.

Chapter and verse.

Oh.

Something you wish to add, Helen?

Oh, I'm sure there's plenty.

Good, then.

And the dispensary?

Yes, surprisingly well-ordered.

Well done.

James, I'm back up at the

Sebright Saunders' estate today,

so I'll have to ask you to do

some extra farm visits,

- if you wouldn't mind.

- Of course, Siegfried.

You know James was

out on call last night?

There's really no need

Well, couldn't Triss take

on some of the work?

Oh, no, full surgery. All day.

Well, then, I'm sorry, but I can't

see another way round it.

I have to attend this horse

and Tristan's got enough

on his plate already.

I'll manage, Siegfried.

It doesn't really seem fair.

Fair?

Fair?

I built this practice

from the ground up.

What's fair is that I'll run it as

I damned well see fit.

I think what

Helen's trying to say

I've no need of an interpreter,

thank you, Mrs. Hall.

Fair?

Fair!

[DOOR SLAMS]

Don't take it to heart.

I'm sure he's just got a lot

on his mind at the moment.

He still shouldn't have

spoken to you like that.

I'll speak to him this evening.

Give over,

I can fight my own battles.

Mrs. H, is everything

all right with my brother?

He has seemed a bit off.

Don't let what's on his mind

play on yours.

He does seem rather combustible,

even by his standards.

You know what he's like.

It'll blow over.

Until the next storm

comes rolling in.

He's just preoccupied

with this case of his.

Now, get out,

so I can get cleared up.

I'd better get ready for surgery.

Give me your keys. I'll drive.

Don't you need to go

up to the farm?

They'll manage.

We can drop in and let me Dad know.

Helen, I'm perfectly fine.

I'm really not that tired.

You see it too, don't you, Jess?

[JESS WHIMPERS]

Feel better for it?

I was just resting my eyes.

Cranford's in there.

I'm just havin' me breakfast.

Come on.

Stagnation on lungs.

I can always tell by

the look in their eyes

and the way the hair

lies along the back.

Shut your stupid cake hole, Mallock.

It were lightning.

You can use all kind words you like.

You can't change what's what.

I should be able to see bruising

under the skin if she was struck.

I don't see anything.

Oh, so you're a vet

an' all now, are you?

Wind it in, will you, Isaac?

Cut into the heart,

would you please, Jeff?

Aye.

There you are:

verrucose endocarditis.

See this cauliflower-like mass?

It's blocking the ventricles.

Fiddlesticks.

Them little things?

I'd still say it were t'lungs.

They're big enough to block the

blood flow and stop the heart.

Listen, Mr. Herriot.

You know the insurance company

can afford to pay for this

far better than I can.

No-one will know.

I'd know, Mr. Cranford.

Well done.

That bloke'd skin

a flea for its hide.

How'd he get on last night?

The stable lads checked

on them about ten o'clock.

River was restless but not too bad.

I think he enjoyed the company.

Glad to hear it.

Hello, friend.

You remember me, don't you?

Excellent.

Now, then, River, you don't mind if

I put this on you, do you?

Thank you. Very kind.

I'm just going to fasten

this up under you.

Now, don't worry.

I'm not going to sit on you.

Bag, please.

Now, then.

I've got an injection that

might calm you down.

Just a little scratch.

It's a new medication,

might help.

There we go.

There.

That wasn't so bad, was it?

Afternoon, Mrs. Beck.

I'm right glad to see you both.

Afternoon, Mrs. Beck.

Good. You've got her

in there, have you?

No. She's somewhere

in the garden.

Georgina.

Where are you?

There you go, love.

I've summat on the stove.

Bring her back tomorrow, won't you?

It's just a cat.

[CAT GROWLING]

It could've gone worse.

She's out, Helen.

The bugger's out!

- Keep your eyes on the road!

- Grab it!

The cat! The cat!

What do you think I'm doing?

- That's me!

- Ooh! She bit me!

Get it off me, Helen!

I can't drive!

She's on the brakes!

Get it! Helen!

I'm doing, I'm getting it!

We need to make riding

normal again,

teach him he's got nothing to fear.

What's this one's name?

Pegasus.

Crop?

Yes.

I think I'm beginning to understand

the root cause of his trouble

a little better.

Thank you.

Open the gate, please.

Let's see how fast you really are.

Looks like you may

have been wrong, Monkham.

Aye, we'll see.

Here you go, love.

Thanks, Mrs. H.

Look at the state of you two.

Don't ask.

You wouldn't believe the answer.

Now, before you do anything,

I think she could probably do with

one of your sedative injections.

Thank you, Jim, but

I'm probably not going

to take advice on handling cats

from someone who looks like

a human scratching post.

We're staying to watch, aren't we?

Oh, yes.

Summat bad's about

to happen, in't it?

Run along.

She's in safe hands now.

[CAT WAILING]

Right.

Let's see what we've got here.

Ah.

Hello, Georgina,

you don't look too

Arghh!

Arghh! Good God. Argh!

Damn thing!

Let's enjoy it a moment longer.

Georgina, get back here!

Get back here right now!

Now River is rested,

it's time to take the next step.

Just to be clear, Farnon,

if anything should happen to you,

I shan't be held responsible.

You'll be paying

your own doctor's fees.

Now, then, are we ready

to have some fun?

Ten bob says

he ends up on his arse.

Come on, then.

That's it.

That's it.

Good.

That's it.

Good.

Well done.

Happy horse.

Happy horse.

Good lad.

Go on, go on.

Hmm.

Somewhat surprising.

Easy, easy.

Easy boy.

Let me help you, Farnon.

I can manage.

Look like you've done

yourself some damage.

It's just a graze.

You have done your very best.

There is nothing more to be done.

I can't afford to keep a horse

that no man can ride.

Is there any decision

you make that isn't measured

against the weight of a coin?

If there is a more certain yardstick

then I'd like to hear it.

What about humanity?

When you've seen what we have,

I'm not sure that exists anymore.

And now it looks like

we're going to make

the same mistakes all over again.

I don't want you to do the

deed, Farnon.

I'll have Monkham take care of it.

He deserves better than that.

I'll come up tomorrow.

This isn't right.

It can't be right.

Not after everything.

Turner gave his life

We have our orders.

We'll open the gates.

Let 'em escape,

run wild.

Maurice, it would only

prolong the agony.

They'd die on the road.

We've done everything we can.

Hello?

Good walk with Gerald?

A little blustery, but

we didn't let that stop us.

Goodness, is that blood?

I fell off a horse.

Really, Mrs. Hall, it's fine.

I thought we might

play our word game.

So long as you don't try to use

any of your funny spellings.

That's a letter from

an old AVC friend.

Maurice Oliver.

I got it about a month ago.

He was the chap

in the photo you found.

He had a practice up in Brawton.

He and I went through

some things together.

Terrible things.

He k*lled himself last week.

Barbiturates.

I've been reading it

over and over and over,

trying to see if there was

anything I might've missed.

If I could've found something,

done something to help him.

But he seems happy.

He talks about his plans

for the summer.

Oh, Siegfried.

Well, I think we can safely say

Cargill's SoothAway is not

the wonder sedative

we were led to believe.

I'm sorry, "we?"

This is your mess.

If anyone's getting it

in the neck from Siegfried,

it's you.

Or we could just not say anything?

And pretend it worked.

Ahh, see,

she's learning.

As I said, the only way of surviving

Siegfried is if we stick together.

To surviving Siegfried.

Surviving Siegfried.

Something funny, is there?

No. Well,

there was, actually.

We were just saying

- Jim.

- Don't.

Right.

Listen.

If these co-called experts

come up offering you

chance of this testing malarky,

show them the bloody road.

Mr. Cranford,

the TB testing programme only exists

to help wipe out a dangerous disease

that kills tens of thousands of

people a year. That's your children,

your brothers, and sisters.

Your parents.

One sick cow and you could lose

the whole bloody herd.

You'll have us out of business.

I think what James is saying is we

all have to make sacrifices for

the greater good.

Oh, aye,

so you'll be having them up your

place then, will you, Alderson?

Aye.

I will, Mr. Cranford.

Thank you.

I just hope to God you don't

end up putting down

half the cows in the district.

I have to say,

I thought you were

very impressive with

Cranford last night.

I almost wanted to get

tested for TB myself.

Just my usual dedication

to the profession, Tristan.

You should try it, Triss.

You take a long bath

last night like I told you to?

I practically turned into a prune.

So long as you didn't use up

all me salts. Like some people.

How did it go with Cranford?

I refused to endorse his

fraudulent lightning claims,

so he's understandably furious.

Then you must be doing

something right.

I see from our daybook that we

spayed Mrs. Beck's cat?

Yes, yes.

All went very smoothly.

No complications.

That sedative you bought

doesn't do much.

Judging by the scratches

on your face.

No, no.

I'll be taking that up with Barge

next time we see him.

Helen, yesterday,

if I was a bit sharp

Siegfried, it's fine.

I've heard far worse.

Audrey told us you were

thrown from a horse.

I really thought I would be

able to help him.

Unfortunately, the damage

is too deeply engrained.

Some things can't be undone.

Tristan, would you mind driving me

up to the Sebright Saunders?

I'm still a bit sore.

Yes, of course.

Thank you.

Bring the humane kit, please.

You see, the Cranfords of this

world are easy to stand up to.

It's the little old ladies

that cause all the bother.

You don't believe me?

All right, then, you try and get

the money out of Mrs. Beck.

Oh, wonderful,

you brought her back.

So good of you.

She's lively enough,

so we've no concerns

about her recovery.

Oh, poor little Georgie.

What have these nasty people

been doing to you?

You can give her

a little milk tonight.

And then some solids from tomorrow.

I suppose you'll be wanting

your money then.

Well, you've got your cat, so

Ten shillings, weren't it?

That's correct, Mrs. Beck.

Oh, Georgina,

you are an expensive p*ssy.

Will she be needing

a follow up appointment?

In a week's time.

How about I pay you

when I pick her up then?

Well, Mrs. Beck

I'd rather leave you to it

if you don't mind, Siegfried.

Actually, I do.

You'll stay this time.

I'm sorry, lad.

I'm so sorry.

Out.

Get out of here now.

Out!

All right, fella, all right.

None of it is

this poor animal's fault.

Oh, Farnon.

Maurice needed help.

No-one was there to give it to him.

But we're here now.

Surely we don't need to repeat the

mistakes and cruelties of the past.

And how many times are

you willing to be thrown off?

As many as it takes.

A racehorse that can't be around

a riding crop is about as useful as

a porcelain hammer.

We need to build up

his confidence and trust.

And then, slowly,

we can start

to re-introduce the crop.

It'll take time.

Now, then, shall we go

for that ride together?

Have a word before

he does himself a mischief.

Siegfried, this doesn't seem like

one of your more sensible ideas.

Others have risked and

given far more, believe me.

Now, listen.

You can kick me off again

as much as you like.

I'm not going to give up on you.

Don't give up on me either.

Maybe we can help each other out.

Good.

Gate, please, Tristan.

All right, River, let's go.
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