01x12 - The World of Who

[bunniefuu]

SIMON". After years of time travel

Dr Who has gone global.

He's been bought, sold and admired.

But when it comes to fighting the
Daleks, the fun and games are at an end.

You will obey
or she will be exterminated.

SIMON: will Rose
have all the answers?

How should I know?

SIMON". Will Captain jack be able
to rise to the occasion?

You're a very cheeky little robot,
did you know that?

SIMON". It's time to avoid the droids
and prepare for battle.

Got myself a g*n.

SIMON". Time travel just turned nasty.

It's play or die.

Action.

One of the first ideas I had for this
whole series was “Game shows gone mad“.

What if reality TV got so out of hand...

that, you know, people d*ed.

But I'm not supposed to be here.

Well, it says Rose on the podium.

As a television fan myself,
and I love those sort of programmes,

I couldn't resist saying what would
happen to those in , years' time?

Welcome to The Weakest Link.

Cut.

SIMON: It's day one an
The Weakest Link set.

As ever, the master of ceremonies
is Anne Robinson.

But she's never been seen
like this before.

It always takes a bit of time
to get used to a new suit.

You start, you know,
to learn what you can and can't do.

It takes about an hour to get them
into the costume alone.

The whole thing is like armour. It goes
on, bolts in places, lots of screws.

And once they're in,
it is quite restrictive.

I feel like the Tin Man.

Sometimes that kind of movement...
That's the only way they can move.

Can't get at it!

It's okay.

BLUETI: The materials we work with,
they can be unmmrj/

and they can cut, they can graze
and we have to be very, very careful.

Okay, he's in.

It's not like going into a Halloween shop,
for £, I'll have that latex Halloween mask.

And you put it on, one size fits all,
and away you go.

These are custom fitted.

You know, everyone gets a picture in
their head of what they're about to get.

There's always butterflies in the stomach
that you're going to wheel this thing in

and go, “Ta-da!“ and everyone's going to go,
“Right, okay. It's not how I saw it,“ you know.

They're meant to look a bit 's-ish, a bit retro.

You know, I love the face of the Anne Droid.
It's silver.

It's silver like you expect, sort of,
science fiction droids to be.

Welcome to The Weakest Link.

Somebody just played the voice of
Anne Robinson, in the background,

doing the questions, and suddenly, you know,
the fear, the adrenaline, starts going through.

, Rose, what do you actually do?

I just travel about a bit. Bit of a tourist,
I suppose.

Then you are unemployed.

And yet you've still got enough money
to buy peroxide.

We thought we would have to get somebody
to imitate her voice

'cause I couldn't imagine
she would appreciate quite how...

terrifying the satire was,
but she absolutely loved it.

Me and Phil went along, we were like kids.
“Oh, my God! It's Anne Robinson.“

I was a bit scared.
We were calling her Miss Robinson.

We were very, very polite. She must have thought
we'd stepped out of the s.

“Oh, it's certainly nice to meet you,
Miss Robinson.“

(BELL RINGING)

B camera.

Rose, in the halovid series, Jupiter Rising,

the Grexnik is married to whom?

How should I know?

(ROSE LAUGHING)

The Weakest Link is, you know,

such a famous and notorious show,

for many different reasons,
that to kind of be on there

and be part of it and be playing opposite
the Anne Droid was...

just a hoot really.

Who is the current emperor of Brazilia?

Cut. Very good, thank you.

We were prepping the series

and getting ready to: Big Brother
and Weakest Link and What Not To Wear,

and then as we hit transmission, on come BBC
saying we want Doctor Who Mastermind

It was one of those moments,
we were filming fake game shows

and the programme's on a real game show...
It's Doctor Who madness!

HUMPHRYS: In the spotlight tonight
is Paul Simpson,

a writer from West Sussex.

All television is about people,
all good television is about people,

and I guess that's what
Doctor Who is about as well.

Doctor Who. Two minutes.

- And your subject is'?
- Doctor Who.

- And your chosen subject'?
- Doctor Who.

People in the audience shouting out,
“No, it's not that. It's...“

What? And, of course, they're right.
They all knew.

You had the feeling they were all sitting there
in the audience and any one of them

could have answered any of the questions!
It's extraordinary. Never had that before.

Possibly our most remarkable achievement is

taking something
that is labelled as niche and cult

and putting it in the mainstream
and getting a mainstream audience.

That is a miracle.
Frankly, I can't believe that's happened.

SIMON". And the show's appeal
has gone beyond the screen

as fans young and old have flocked to Brighton
to see the brand-new Doctor Who exhibition.

Our first opening weekend was two weekends ago

and over that we had
about , people come through.

We have so many families come down
and it's proved, so far, to be a success.

You hear all these things about
those Saturday tea times

where all the families sit around and
watch telly together have d*ed a death.

This programme changed that.

Little kids are absolutely over the moon with it,
they absolutely love it.

The look on their face at the other side,
it's been a real adventure for them.

It was scary seeing the Dalek up close.

We were looking forward to seeing Daleks,
weren't we, Ed?

Yeah, and the Slitheen.
We were quite looking forward to seeing them.

Yeah, those were two
of our favourite episodes, probably.

They are quite scary
and they are amazing models.

It was a bit like being inside the show, really,

seeing all the props and everything
from the show.

To see the reaction of the kids,
the way I used to be,

and to think after all these years
it's still the same, it still has that effect,

it's been wonderful and I'm really happy with it.

When I was a kid, I used to go to Blackpool
with my family

and they had a Doctor Who exhibition there.

And there'd be all the monsters
and creatures and Daleks and aliens.

And I'd seen them on TV, loved them,

and then I saw these things
and I actually thought to myself,

“My God, someone makes those as a job.
Somebody made these things.“

- Has a good lantern jaw.
- Lantern jaws are so last year.

GORTON". With the Trine-E and Zu-Zana,
I showed Russell a s food mixer.

Didn't want them to be shiny chrome,

[just thought something
that looks almost like a kitchen appliance.

The robots are fantastic, they look like Lego.

There's a little hint that something
Daleky is happening.

There is that nice sh*t of Trine-E and Zu-Zana
where they glide across the room

and they were quite Daleky there.

That was always intended
as a little hint as to what was behind it all.

Design classic!

Never wear black with colour.

It makes the colour look cheap
and the black look boring.

I'd like to think that I wouldn't be
one of their candidates

but if they ever want me on, really,
it's a challenge, I'll go on, no problem.

It's all the way from Tim Henman
to the Terminator, everything. It's quite cool.

Action.

I'm just not getting this, it's too decent.

It's just too safe.

Am I naked in front of millions of viewers?

BOTH". Absolutely!

(BELL RINGING)

Your viewing figures just went up.

Cut. Print it, print it.

The thing with Trine-E and Zu-Zana is,

where Captain jack is transmitted

into this game show world
and he's basically playing along with them

and trying to figure out what is happening
and where the Doctor and Rose have gone.

And in the process, he gets defabricated

and ends up standing stark naked
in front of two robots

and that's been quite fun.

It's funny, that's the only thing
in the entire series

where BBC editorial policy stepped in
and said, “You can't do that.“

You were meant to see Captain Jack's bum

and it was sh*t, but it's the only area
where they stepped in and said,

“You're just going too far,“
which I don't agree with.

I've seen men's bums on Neighbours.

So I'm really upset about that.

I've had a lot of things, you can cut dialogue,
you can cut everything else,

but I'm most upset about my butt being cut.

Excellent.

And now it's time for the face-off!

What does that mean?
Do I get to compete against another contestant?

No, like I said, face---off.

- But that's a Compact Laser Deluxe.
- Where were you hiding that?

You really don't want to know.

One of the nice things is after weeks of work, we
get to blow Trine-E and Zu-Zana up at the end.

A perverse kind of fun comes out of blowing
something up that you spent weeks building.

I don't know why. Everyone always enjoys it.

SIMON". But now the game is up.
It's time to get serious.

Atta boy!

Got myself a g*n.
Well, ladies, the pleasure was all mine.

You knew there was a big w*r on the way

and, frankly, for w*r, you need soldiers.

'Cause I'm still not happy with the thought of
Rose picking up a g*n and sh**ting people,

The Doctor would never do that.

- Don't sh**t.
- Don't be so thick, like I was ever gonna sh**t.

That's why Jack was absolutely essential,
to build him up as a soldier,

a very happy soldier as well.

ALL: # Happy birthday, dear John

♪ Happy birthday to you ♪

(CREW CLAPPING)

So I actually needed someone
who could go out there

and fight the good fight in a situation
where a g*n does need picking up

'cause you're fighting the Daleks.

Oh, you're kidding! How fantastic.

(CREW LAUGHING)

My very own Dalek. Whoo!

SIMON". And the Doctor's about to get
his very own surprise.

In the form of the Dalek Fleet.

It was always our intention
to bring the Daleks back for the series finale.

ships. More than , on board each one.

That's just about half a million of them.

They really are a proper race of aliens.

A m*llitary race
with fleets and ships and strategies and plans.

We have your associate.

You will obey or she will be exterminated.

No.

It had unlimited scope in the 's

'cause they had so little room to work in.

It gave them all the room in the world,
all the room in their heads to do it.

And I wanted to bring that back.

What is the meaning of this negative?

It means no.

In , we actually have an opportunity to say,

“Look, there are Dalek spaceships.

“There are herds of Daleks flying through the air.
There's an army on the way.“

No, 'cause this is what I'm gonna do.
I'm gonna rescue her.

I'm gonna save Rose Tyler
from the middle of the Dalek Fleet.

And then I'm gonna save the Earth.
And then, just to finish off,

I'm gonna wipe every last stinking Dalek
out of the sky!

We can actually show the programme
as it always was.

Just you were never able to see it. I love that.

- Rose.
- Yes, Doctor?

I'm coming to get you.