04x96 - Desert Storm

[bunniefuu]

It's one of the most spectacular, if not THE
most spectacular episode of Doctor Who EVER!

It's a bit of a romp.

I love you!

Action. Tickets please.
It's destination Dubai

for the filming of
Planet Of The Dead.

But as Confidential found out,

the desert location was trickier than imagined
and the team really did whip up a storm.

It's all gone a wee bit...
a wee bit Pete Tong today.

It looks terrible.

We were just utterly
doomed on this sh**t.

It was extraordinary
the bad luck we had.

And the bad luck came when the big red bus
suffered a slightly heavy-handed makeover.

Bang!

Without giving away too much, it's last
chance for the Doctor to have some fun.

The more I see of
this galaxy,Me too.

It's a rollicking great
adventure. I'm ready!

DOCTOR WHO THEME PLAYS

Travelling with the tenth
Doctor is fast reaching

its final destination,

so the team are more
ambitious than ever.

The challenge was to create a perfect alien
landscape. And the only place to do that

was over , miles away.

I knew that a desert visit was on the
cards. I knew that had been talked about.

We had a foreign location
in mind from the start.

There's so much of it set in
this desert actually you think,

"Well, phoof, there's the... It's
going to be hard not to go to a desert."

You have a problem sh**ting
alien planets in this country -

it's a quarry or it's a beach

and looks like it even if
you put a planet in the sky.

And right towards the end of our time, I
wanted to push it further and to go for broke

and make it look like a
degree view of somewhere alien.

And that alien landscape

was created deep in the
heart of a desert in Dubai.

Call it a hunch

but I think we've gone a
little bit further than Brixton.

As if finding a location

wasn't hard enough,
the next challenge

was getting a seven tonne bus
to the middle of the desert.

Dubai has some amazing landscapes
- beautiful desert vistas.

So we had to find a part of
the desert that was near enough

to the road, where we could
drag our bus that last yards.

I had lots of fears about getting the bus into
the desert. I mean, it's a red double-decker bus,

there's a lot of sand in the desert

and, um, I really was questioning

how we were going to do it.

Ed always said, you know,
" , miles is the easiest bit.

"It's the last yards which
are going to be the toughest."

I have no idea

how the bus is going to get into theWell, Ed is
next to you, he can tell you. Ed, how can the bus...?

We've no idea how the bus is
going to get into the... But...

It's going to get in. But...

It's not going to move.I'm
thinking that all the time.

So the recce, the
part... the main decision

was where we were actually
going to plant this bus.

So we found a bit of the
desert which was kind of near

to where we could get
access to it but also

it felt like you were actually
in the middle of nowhere.

James, it's not easy,
is it?It's not easy.

If we get the bus up
here... WOMAN CHUCKLES

We got our double-decker
busSafely to Dubai.

And so it was like Happy New
Year, our bus has arrived.

Brilliant. It all
went very well,Yeah.

It looked amazing.

We'd done it. You know,
what else could go wrong?

That bus in the desert in its
m*nled state just looks fantastic.

Here we are in Dubai,

the bus is in position.

We've got our guys up here trimming all the
plants back. We're cutting all the plants off -

making sure all the
shrubbery, all the greenery

is taken away.

Um, once we've done all that,
across the back of me here

we then bring the grading machine
in and then we grade the whole area.

Um, we'll then go along everything over
the top with our brushes and our rakes

to make sure it's
all nice and smooth.

♪ Mr Sand Man

♪ Bring me a dream

♪ Dum dum dum dum

♪ Make him the cutest

♪ That I've ever seen

♪ Dum dum dum dum

♪ Give him two lips

♪ Like roses in
cloverDum dum dum dum

♪ And then tell him That
his lonesome nights are over

♪ So please turn on your magic beam

♪ Mr Sand Man

♪ Bring us, please please please

♪ Mr Sand Man

♪ Bring us a dreamDum dum dum dum

♪ Dum dum dum dum dum! ♪

First of all you have
to source the bus.

The way the schedule was
working we had to have two buses

cos one bus had to be put on the
boat and we'd lose it for five weeks

but we had to continue
the sh**t back here.

So buying two buses
from a disused fleet

was seriously challenging.

Well, we bought two
buses but they are similar

but not exactly the same so there
are differences in the seats,

um, you know, and things inside
like the lights and the poles.

So we're just matching two buses
up. Now we've got them both here,

we can see exactly
which to match to what.

Once we'd decided on Dubai,

obviously the obvious
option of driving it there -

going through three w*r zones, unlike with Italy
- wasn't actually feasible.

It really was tight. We couldn't find
anybody to fly a double-decker bus...

Mmm...so shipping was
the only option then.

And we did
- we shipped a bus out.

So the bus kind of
set forth, um, set sail

and went to the other side. We
waved it off from off the boat.

♪ We're all going
on a summer holiday

♪ No more working for a week or two

♪ Fun and laughter
on our summer holiday

♪ No more worries for me or you

♪ For a week or two... ♪

It has to be loaded on and it has to be labelled
up and a bus isn't something that just fits

in a container. It has to travel on
the deck of the boat on an open pallet.

RUSSELL: I thought they just drove

And when you realise the
paperwork and the insurance

and the technical practicalities. You
have to take the hydraulics out of the door

just because it's not safe to travel
- it's a fire hazard. I don't even know what I'm talking about.

Other people will know what they're talking about
on this subject. The electrics have to be fixed.

you don't just drive it on. It's
a really complicated procedure

that everyone on the
team just did brilliantly.

♪..We're goingSHIP'S HORN BLARES

♪ We're going where the
sea is blueSEAGULL CRIES

♪ We've seen it in the
moviesSHIP'S HORN BLARES

♪ Now let's see if it's
true. ♪BUS BELL RINGS

There was a moment of wild
rejoicing when the bus got to Dubai

because it was there and job over.

From there it was just a simple job of sort of driving
it, because it was still working, driving it, um,

into the, um...into the desert.

I was at home in Manchester and at
eight in the morning Julie Gardner rang.

Um, and she said, "There's been
a...been a little incident with the bus."

Bang! CRASH!

As I sat on the phone to her,
the photo came through of the bus.

We were on the phone to each
other and this photo came through.

And...

yeah, it'd been...HE CHUCKLES

It'd been slightly damaged

First of all, we anticipated that the damage to the
bus was going to be the hassle of maybe sending out

a panel or something.

Um, and when we all saw
the pictures of this bus,

it was like, "Aaargh!"

In a way, the subsequent pain and confusion that
we went through as a production team for a few days

was kind of worth it for
Russell T Davies' laughter.

We laughed and laughed and laughed

because no-one was hurt and we had insurance so once
you're past those two things and knew that immediately,

it's not the end of the world, you
know, it's actually very, very funny.

And so we laughed for about three
hours. We were hooting on the phone.

If you imagine a double-decker
bus, red double-decker bus,

sticking up another storey out
of the sea of blue containers

and then you take one
crane with a container

hovering at that
single storey level,

and you just wipe it straight
into the top of the bus -

and that's what happened. It's a
brilliant piece of sculptural work

by whoever did it,
you know. It really is.

You couldn't make an art installation
as perfectly as that, you know?

It was a nightmare.

What the hell are we gonna do?!

That was the sort of... I think we sat in Tracie's
office - me, Ed, Steve, Tracie - and it was like,

"Oh, my God, what are we gonna do?"

But to be honest, I thought of a solution straightaway
as I sat there. Once we'd finished laughing

looking at this
photo on my computer,

then I just said, "Right, so
the bus was damaged in transit.

"It goes through a wormhole
- that's what happens to a bus when it goes through a wormhole."

Look at the damage
- it was the bus protecting us.

It's still intact though.

Not as bad as it looks. The chassis's still
holding together. My boss is going to m*rder me.

So I didn't ever for a moment think
we wouldn't be able to sh**t it.

So, um, we have an undamaged bus

which now had to be damaged
to match the one in Dubai.

In order for us to achieve

the amount of damage on the bus
to look like it's been squashed,

we had to cut a slot into
the floor of the upper deck,

a five inch slot,
which we compressed in

and with the use of these
ratchet straps have held it back

to make it look
like it's crushed in.

Then we basically jammed the
bus up against something solid,

and with the aid of a
very big tele-handler

we literally pushed on the top deck until we have
achieved the kind of curve that you see there today.

That's good. Let me just check
inside and see what that looks like.

It's good from what
I imagine on the, er...

It's looking good actually.

It's working really well.

In Dubai, the bus underwent
some major wormhole surgery.

All that was left to do was to send in the cast
and crew to give them a taste of what was to come.

When we woke up on
the first morning,

you suddenly saw the hills
of the desert all around you

and, er, you realised you were
somewhere rather different.

And we went out and we saw the bus

sitting in the desert and we saw
the locations that we were gonna use.

It wasn't a baking hot day,
but it was certainly clear-skied

and it looked like somewhere alien,
which was, after all, the point.

Hey, guys! Welcome to the desert.

So, we've just come to the bus
for the first time with the crew.

We came here on the reckie to
spot where we were gonna put it,

but this is the first time I've
seen it actually in situ myself.

We had photos sent over. But yeah,
it's great to see it actually here

and in a desert,
which is all bonkers!

It's all absolutely THE most
bonkers thing we've ever done.

But it's here! Our bus is here.

A bit more damaged than the last
time I saw it, but it's great.

It's quite emotional, actually.

You can see what we're up
against here with the bus,

so let's make sure everybody knows that
we don't walk out of the hazard-tape area.

Let's not walk anywhere that
we don't have to go, guys,

because otherwise it's gonna give the art
department a hell of a job getting rid of the sand.

It's not gonna be easy.
It's gonna be fun, though.

It's about working
together, getting it done.

I'm gonna film
YOU! Ha-ha-ha!

The challenges we're gonna face

is sh**ting the scenes
when they first arrive,

which have no footprints and
the sand has to be pristine.

S obviously to get the bus in and
everybody coming to have a look today,

I'm trying to tell everybody
to stay near the bus.

We don't want any footprints cos we're gonna
have to by hand brush and blow them out,

so the more we can
make this a pristine set

for that moment when they first appear
in the desert, then the better, really.

Guys, just stay close to the
bus.Really close to the bus.

It looked brilliant.

So yeah, there it was, all
ready for first day's filming.

What possibly could go wrong?

Back in Cardiff, the main
challenge was a location challenge,

because we had to find an
amazing space for the museum,

The International
Gallery, at the beginning.

We were lucky enough to use Cardiff's
main museum, which was beautiful.

It had this amazing big
atrium which we used.

Positions!

It just looks beautiful and
these places are so kind to us.

We go in there at night
- we don't just go and sh**t an ordinary scene,

it has to have a jewel thief
flying in on wires doing a heist

and that's a big set-up for a very
posh and very well-maintained building.

They were just fantastic to us.

Quite unusual story in that you start with
the companion in the middle of a crime.

I don't think we've
done that before.

It gives you this hi-tech,
glossy, sexy opening

of the Cup Of Athelstan.

There were guards, there were lasers

and it just sets up the
standard of the episode.

It says this is gonna be big, it's gonna
be glossy, it's actually gonna be fun.

So, let's just re-set...

You happy with those
positions, James?

Bring it down again, so don't
worry about taking the back out.

It is fantastic to get
Michelle Ryan on board.

It was just one of those
magic bits of casting.

Beautiful jewel thief,
young, sexy, great actor.

There's only Michelle.

Michelle pretty much did
all of her own stunts.

It was brilliant.

The very first thing we did, the very
first scene on the very first day,

was Michelle on a wire coming
down from the ceiling in the museum

stealing the Cup Of Athelstan.

Right from the very first
meeting I had with her,

she said, look, I want to
do as much of it as I can.

Which is great, because that means you
can sh**t it exactly how you want to do it,

knowing you won't have to
cut round a stunt performer,

however brilliant they are,

but doesn't look quite
like your performer.

The wire work was great.
I'm a real adrenaline junkie,

so getting into any kind of stunts,

especially ones where I'm
dropped form a great height

and then have to do
spins, it's great. Ha-ha!

We're gonna do the
whole drop from the top,

change over and taking
her back up again.

OK.

Going up.

MUSIC: "Steady As She
Goes" by The Raconteurs

And , , ...

And I'm amazed. I'm like, oh, my
God! They've flown her in properly!

And it just looks stunning.

That'll do. OK.Thank you. Cut there.

Christina's such a
brilliant character.

She's a real adventuress

and she is constantly
searching for the next thrill

and there's a reason for that.
She's running away from her life,

so there's a sort of
depth to her character.

I walked in and said, she's
gotta have her own life,

an identity completely separate
to the Dr's and a match for his.

There's nothing better
than jewel thief.

Over to you, the Dr.

Christina is stealing
the Cup Of Athelstan.

She says because she needs the
money, but as the Dr points out,

that's not really what you steal
if you're after a bit of easy cash.

Don't tell me you need the
money.Daddy lost everything.

No, no, no. You're short
of cash, you rob a bank.

Stealing this, that's a lifestyle.

That's Lady Christina. Life is
for kicks, life's for living.

She just lives for the
moment and the adventure.

And action!

Whenever the Dr has a new companion,

she's always described as feisty.

I tend to have that effect.

Christina would
certainly tick that box.

As soon as she walked on
set in that black number,

she nailed it. It was brilliant.

ALARM RINGS

SHE SIGHS

Cut there. Very close.
Not bad. One more.

She was the perfect Lady Christina.

She was elegant, poised, she
looked great in the costume,

she looked beautiful, sexy.

She just completely encapsulated
what Lady Christina should be.

ALARM RINGS

Sorry, lover

Who are you?

I'm Christina.

Christina!

No!

Perfect. You've got me!

Ready for every emergency.

It doesn't sound like you. I've
been through all the extremes.

That's how I like things. Extreme.

Wonderful.

There's scope for her
to return in the future.

If the next production team wants a red double-decker
bus to fly down into the middle of a story!

I'd love it!

And action!

We had a real bus that Christina
gets on to in Oxford Street in London.

Not really, but a
busy shopping street.

She's running from the police...

Here we go, still on cameras...

OK, background action!

And action.

Right, close off the area,
get all these people cleared.

She has got to be here somewhere.

He's called Di McMillan...

No, he's not called Di McMillan!
Oh, no! That's hilarious!

I tell you why I said
that, because... Ha!

Stevie in makeup thought that's
what the character was called!

He thought he was a
of Welsh copper. No!

He's Detective Inspector McMillan.

That's hilarious. Not
Di McMillan at all.

He's been chasing this Lady
Christina de Souza for some time now

and he's getting to the end
of his tether of it, frankly.

So, he thinks he's just got her
after this big burglary heist

and she slips out
of his grasp again.

Action!

Clear the road! Get the
whole place sealed off.

There! Stop the bus!

So, he gets a little
frantic, if a touch psychotic,

about wanting to arrest her.

Jackson, follow that bus!

Cut there!

Put on your seatbelt, let's go!

Cut there!

Go, Jackson!

HE LAUGHS

No, that was great. That was like
a good old-fashioned car chase!

We got our bus and chased
it with police cars.

High speed chases, that's great!

Being in a police
car and bombing around

and having whole roads closed off for you
- fantastic!

All units, in pursuit. Registration
whiskey, nine, seven, four...

That's definitely been the
highlight. Very exciting.

Boys own stuff, when do
you ever get to do that?

Seal off the north end.

There's something
spooky about tunnels.

You know when you're a kid and
it's exciting when you go through?

Why is a tunnel more
exciting than a motorway?

It just is, though.
There's something...

Oh, there's something about the...

To me it suggests going
somewhere else, it's a journey.

There's a sense of
liberation when you come out.

There is
- there's something fascinating about them.

The bus has entered the
south entrance of the tunnel.

We closed Butetown
tunnels for four nights.

It's one of the busiest
roads in Cardiff.

We've been very lucky
to piggy-back maintenance

that Cardiff Council are doing. We're
trying to get it after the rush hour.

We'll get it up to . , am so
we don't cause too much chaos.

We never thought we'd actually get
to shut the tunnel for that long.

But bless 'em, you know, they
let us in there for four nights.

That was brilliant.

When we go again, can I do the
bus and the police car following?

Almost, like, in the same sh*t?

Funny thing's, aren't they, tunnels?

It's true, but why? Why?

Why are they exciting? Even when I'm an
adult, you go through a tunnel and go whooh!

LAUGHS That's ridiculous, isn't it?

What was your name?Christina.

Christina, hold on tight.

Everyone, hold on!

Got that?

Everybody OK?

My hair!

The buses, believe it
or not, aren't that big.

It wasn't a set, it was a real
bus we'd just converted into a set.

But in terms of matching the bus
to Dubai, the challenge was...

outside the window
is meant to be desert,

so we had to be quite
clever and use translights,

which is kind of a big
photograph of the actual desert,

which you put outside and light it and it gave
us the flexibility to sh**t all that material

in a controlled environment rather
than actually being on location.

So what this is, Dan's
breaking up silicon.

Er...it gets poured
into a sheet form

and what we do then is
just break it up and tear it

and break it up into
lots of small pieces.

That creates all our debris.

It's like real glass.

We'll be f*ring it using our high-pressure
CO f*ring sys... um, woofers,

which will be blasting in
into the windows of the bus.

OK, cameras set, here we go.

Set? Yeah. Here we go.

And three, two, one...

SCREAMING

What's going on?

Cut there.

Everybody OK, guys?

Well done.

The director's walking
past me right now.

Were you pleased with
the overall effects?

No, they were great.
They were good, yeah.

Very happy. Great, good.

sh**t day one, we arrived
at breakfast in the morning,

sat down, the wind was blowing...

It was a little gloomy.

It sensed a bit breezier
than the day before.

It's day one in the
desert, it's a bit overcast,

we're hoping the sun's
gonna burn through,

which it looked like it was doing,
but suddenly the wind's got up.

It's a bit calmer here, but over on that
ridge, it's beginning to feel like a sandstorm,

which obviously isn't ideal.

♪..Sandstorm blowing in my head

♪ Seeing many colours But the
only one I'm coming to is red

♪ It's stopping me dead

♪ Tryin' to make some tracks But
my feet they feel like lead... ♪

Come on, come on!

Usually, it burns off and by
am it's kind of, it's nice.

But, um...it didn't burn off,
it kind of got a bit worse.

It got darker and darker and darker.

Try not to look likeNo.

We did come all
this way for the sun.

It's the worst day they've known
out here, talking to the local crew.

So we were planning
to use the crane today,

but the wind means it's
too dangerous to take up.

So that'll stay on overnight,
and it was calm this morning,

so we're hoping in the morning it'll
be calm and we can get the crane up.

We were just utterly
doomed on the sh**t.

It was extraordinary, the bad luck we
had, you know, with the damaged bus,

and then going into the sandstorm.

It's Desert Storm,
as opposed to Dr Who.

Just when you think it's settling,

you get hit in the face
with another load of it.

So it's...a little frustrating, it's
not how we'd wish it to be today.

But we live in hope that tomorrow the skies
will be clear and the wind will have gone.

Worst of all, it looks
terrible. It looks awful.

We've gone all this way...

That for me was the worst bit, it wasn't so much
the conditions because we can film in anything.

It wasn't so much the kind
of... discomfort, or, you know,

"It's bad, it's a
sandstorm, isn't that awful?"

The worst thing was
it looked terrible.

You took a wide sh*t
and you couldn't see...

You could see the bus, but
the sky was completely white.

And all of our actors stood there

just being blasted
by this wave of sand.

Please, ladies and
gents, let's rehearse.

I know it's not easy today,
guys, but let's just...

do what we can.

I love it. I have to admit, I love
the elements, so the wind, the rain,

I am actually really enjoying
it, so that's my take on it.

Because the wind was there
all day and you're so exposed,

it was just whipping up all the
time and sand in your face all day,

which was...pretty
grim, to be honest,

and fairly relentless.

It's playing havoc with her hair and make-up. The
look is quite windswept and beyond that really,

so yeah, I think they're
a little bit like...

yeah, it's causing a few issues.

Well, I can't see it, but apparently
my hair, I've gone rather blond.

And I'm fairly caked
in sand on my face.

They've basically decided they can't do anything
too close on Michelle and I for the rest of the day

because we're both fairly ravaged
by this continual blowing sand.

A couple of the local guys
had gone out the day before

and got themselves scarves, as worn
by the Arabs, and that was fine,

and the morning started and
it got breezier and breezier

and I thought...I didn't know
how else to protect people.

So I sent one of the Arab fixers
to buy about headscarves.

By the afternoon I couldn't tell who anyone
was. All I could see was sunglasses and scarves.

We didn't know who was
operating...Or who was who.

♪ Everyone knows it's Windy

♪ And Windy has stormy eyes

♪ That flash at the sound of lies

♪ And Windy has wings to fly

♪ Above the clouds... ♪

It's all gone a wee
bit Pete Tong today.

♪..Everyone knows it's Windy... ♪

We haven't completed a scene
yet because, as you can see,

every time we come out on a recce,
the weather has been gorgeous.

Day-one filming and
it's desert storm.

For a moment, it was quite dark.

And...action!

This time, it's us.

WE'VE moved.

The whole bus!

The wind's a major b*mb, but also, cos we've
decided we've got to keep crew off the set,

because it's meant to be an
empty planet, so no footprints,

we've surrounded the set with
plastic tape that rattles in the wind.

It's either keep the crew off the
set or have the rattling in the wind.

It's a compromise, but it's like herding cats,
working with a film crew, keeping them off.

Oh, humans on buses, always
blaming me! Look, if you must know,

I was tracking a hole
in the fabric of reality.

Call it a hobby. But it was a tiny
little hole, no danger to anyone.

Then it gets big and we
drive right through it.

The wind is causing a nightmare for us. Any
radio mikes we're using are absolutely...

Cos any wind on those
and we're stuffed.

So it's literally just battling through and the
boys with the booms trying to get as much as we can.

At least we've got some form of wind
protection. I'm just turning over.

It's kind of nice and
compact in here. Cheers!

sh*t on camera?

Good, happy with that?

And...action!

Oh, she's gone. Sorry!

Sorry! Are you OK?

Yeah, I'm fine.

You sure? Yeah.

Sorry! It's all right.

Cut there, guys, please.

So it wasn't the
easiest day's filming.

It was a bit of a
disappointment, frankly.

And a bit of a worry cos
we'd come all that way

to make the most of this extraordinary
location and you couldn't see it!

But luckily, come the Friday, the weather
got more tranquil as that day went on.

It started to brighten up.

And it brightened up
and brightened up...

Then the Saturday it was baking hot,
it was like filming Lawrence Of Arabia.

MUSIC: Theme from Lawrence Of Arabia

Did you hear
something?Hold on, busy.

BLEEPING There's a
noise, like a sort of...

GURGLING There's something new.

Glurrgh!

I think, when you ask for a
monster that's a giant fly,

and you get a big, giant fly, it's one of the
pleasures of the job. That's exactly what I wanted.

He's good at coming up with aliens
that look like recognisable things.

I've always love giant animals.

So we've had a rhino alien...

..Photo no!

..we've had cat people...

Now we've got the fly people.

The influence was just Russell
said, "Look at pictures of a fly,

"a fly's head."

I just thought, if you get a giant fly, you put
the lens on and see all those multi-faceted images.

Doctor...

And I love that old s...
like The Fly and everything.

Blurghh!

CLICKS HIS TONGUE It's white.

I love the Tritovores. They're like
our little homage to ' s sci-fi.

And actually, they
had this really unique

kind of little characters,
the two of them.

They genuinely felt
like different beings.

A fly doesn't have a mouth as such,

so to give the impression
when they're talking,

we just need action going on around
the mouth from various mandibles

so we can move them in a way that
is sympathetic with the speech,

but it can't actually form
words or pronounce words.

Those mouths are kind
of creepy, I think. Ugh!

CLICKING

Hello, everyone.

Hello!

Hiya.

'There's nothing worse than arriving
on set when filming for the first time'

and seeing the monster, so you have a
show-and-tell just to iron out any problems.

And stop.

Look around.

And the heads either
side, a bit more... Yeah.

So speed everything
up, basically.Yeah.

Great, good.

You could read a newspaper...

LAUGHTER

They just work. They're
just so identifiable.

And a story that's full of different ideas and stories
- there's a jewel, a swan, a desert, a wormhole -

you need something
that's very instant,

you don't take time to get to know the Tritovores,
you just see them. "Oh, aliens or giant flies."

MUSIC: "Pretty Fly For
A White Guy" by Offspring

They were brilliant, and
so, kind of, sweet, in a way,

you really got to like them, before
they were gruesomely m*rder*d.

Come on!

There's a sad end for the
Tritovores, much as I love them,

because, to be blunt, the story would've
got complicated if they'd got back to Earth.

UNIT would've had to find them a home or
something, and they had to die, I'm afraid.

So they're nice brave
flies in the end,

and giving their lives fighting
to save their ship from stingrays.

They're a force of
nature, stingrays.

They're a sort of interesting alien enemy in
that they don't talk, I don't think they can talk,

they're quite primitive beasts, that actually have
quite a sophisticated life cycle, in that they just eat.

They simply devour. They have
no evil intent, they just eat.

They were born to eat.
They're born hungry.

Like a plague of
locusts, if you like.

Going across planets,
going across the universe.

So their velocity makes the wormhole,
then their body makes it safe.

Perfect design.

I like them as an enemy,
because it's different, actually.

They're just following a life
cycle, just swarming, spawning,

they're just trying to survive. That's
how they live. It just happens that Earth

is getting in their way.

HE LAUGHS

Back down to Earth, and an all-g*ns-blazing UNIT
step in to take the sting out of their tails.

Hello. How you doing?

Boys, we'll have a
little run-through.

Make sure you stand in line, because
the b*ll*ts, the casings will...

The casings are gonna come
forward, OK? So don't get in front

or behind someone, else you might get
a casing in the back of the head. OK,

nice and quiet. Here we go.

, take one, A camera.

B camera.

C camera.

OK, g*ns are hot, guys.

Very loud bangs, mind
your ears. Here we go.

And...

action. So you're on guard.

There's a ripple in the tunnel...

and the bus comes through
and flies above your heads.

Over by the bridge.

It's turning round...

then there's another
noise back at the tunnel.

And then three stingrays
fly up, one, two, three,

they're flying above.

THEY SHOUT Fire at will!

g*nf*re

Cut there. Very good.

Are you happy?

Thank you, move along, guys.

Returning fire!

Malcolm!

Close that wormhole! Yes, sir!

He's hung up on me!

No, no!

Argh!

It's a lovely friendship,
The Doctor and Malcolm,

cos they don't meet
until the very end.

Lee, I think that last
line of yours is...

"I...love...you."

What do you say?
You go, "I love you."

I love you...I was gonna say,
I was gonna turn to him and go,

"Guess who I love?"

THEY LAUGH "I love him."
But that's too much.

"I...love..."

"Guess who I love? Him."

"I...love...you."

To get Lee Evans was just a thrill.

When you're actually writing Malcolm,
you don't really think of a comedy actor.

You have to create him first of
all. He's unashamedly funny, lovely.

Then you're lucky enough to cast Lee Evans, you
don't imagine you'll get a casting like that, never.

Not in a million years did I imagine we'd get someone
that big, which just makes it hilarious, I think.

OK, rehearsing.

, take five, pick-up.

A camera. B camera.

THEY LAUGH

g*ns are f*ring, g*ns are f*ring!

Brilliant. He's so funny. This is
the first day I've worked with him,

and he's just brilliant.

Always cracking
jokes, he's very funny.

Ultimately, Malcolm's the
hero. Malcolm is the one who

kind of pulls it round,
puts himself on the line,

has a g*n pointed at his head. So
he's, yeah, he's a hero. We love him.

Thanks very much,
everybody. Thanks. Thanks.

Is Lee finished?
That's a wrap on Lee.

Hello, Doctor?

Hello, Malcolm.

HE LAUGHS

Cor blimey! And I'm
actually speaking to you!

What do I do?

We will never surrender.

You're my new best friend.

HE SCREAMS

And you're mine too, sir. Doctor?

THEY SCREAM Not now, Malcolm!

Malcolm! Not now.

I'm busy!

He's a devil, that one!

I'm ready.

Ready for what?

Yes! Yes!

I love you.

What a nice man. What a lovely, lovely
man, as well. He was just gorgeous.

, take one, A camera mark.

B camera mark. C
camera.Action, Michelle.

That's quite enough of that.

Little blue box. Just like you said.

Hold it there a minute, please.

I think The Doctor has met
his match with Christina.

He's The Doctor, the born
leader in the centre of it all,

and then Christina comes along
and completely knocks him sideways.

Everyone do exactly as I say.
Inside the bus immediately.

And you, The Doctor. Yes, ma'am.

The Doctor's sort of met his match.

Erm...their conversation bats to and fro
when they're wrestling for who's in charge.

I thought you were in charge!

I am.

I think the obvious chemistry of that
rom-com bristle you get between the two

all the way through
finally comes in the kiss.

Did I say I hated you?

I was lying.

Christina is one of the great
companions that never was, I suppose.

You kind of want her to
go with him at the end.

MUSIC: "Use Somebody"
by Kings Of Leon

Hello, I'm The Doctor.

It's Christina De Souza.

I hate you.

We make quite a couple.

We don't make any sort of
couple, thank you very much.

Who are you? Let's just say

I'm The Doctor. This is Christina. The honourable
Lady Christina. Least, I hope she's honourable.

I'm not letting you out of my sight.

Worse it gets, the more I love it.

Me too.

You're an alien? Yeah.

But you don't have
to kiss me either.

You look Human.

You look Time Lord.

Anyway.

You were right.

I've got you. I've got you.

We're quite a team.

Ha! We were made for each other.

We're a team.

We could've been so good together.

Christina. We were!

Nice and busy, my soldiers.

, take three, A camera mark.

And...action! Right then.

Off we go. Come on, Doctor.

Show me the stars.

No. What?

I said no.

Christina's one of those characters that,
had The Doctor met her at a different point,

would've ended up coming along
with him. They're kindred spirits,

but I suppose, after recent events,
with losing Donna and losing Rose,

and, erm...

everything that happened
in Journey's End,

he's feeling a little bit fragile and not
really ready to let anybody on board the TARDIS.

Why not?

People have travelled with
me, and I've lost them.

Lost them all.

Never again.

He's just at the wrong point in his life
to want companions. That's the point,

she would be the perfect companion. Can you imagine
that TARDIS? They would be dazzling together.

It's just...he's a
lonely man at the moment,

he just cannot commit again. He cannot
take someone on board the TARDIS,

and has to turn her down.

Take her away.

He then gets a very chilling
warning towards the end,

where Carmen comes out with a
spooky science-fiction prophecy.

Doctor...

You take care now.

You too! Chops and gravy, lovely.

No. But you be careful,

because your song is ending, sir.

So there's a warning
that trouble's on its way.

So he's had a good time. This has
been hinted for a while, actually.

The Ood a while ago said "your
song must end soon" to him,

so it's been in the air for a little bit,
now suddenly he's getting this confirmed.

He will knock four times.

It's a phrase that's gonna come up
again in our autumn episode set on Mars,

and it certainly is gonna
come up again in our two-part

regeneration episodes
over Christmas.

Erm...beyond that,
I'm saying no more.

He doesn't know what's ahead of
him, but, obviously, it's bad,

and you've got no
idea how bad it is.

Oh, it's bad. HE LAUGHS