01x04 - Rest in Metal

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Poker Face". Aired: January 26, 2023 - present.*
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A mystery-of-the-week series following Charlie Cale, who has an extraordinary ability to determine when someone is lying.
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01x04 - Rest in Metal

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♪ Once in your life you find her ♪

♪ Someone that turns your heart around ♪

♪ And next thing you know you're closing ♪

♪ Down the town ♪

♪ Wake up and it's still with you ♪

♪ Even though you left her way 'cross town ♪

♪ Wondering to yourself ♪

♪ "Hey, what've I found?" ♪

♪ When you get caught between the moon ♪

♪ And New York City ♪

♪ I know it's crazy ♪

♪ But it's true ♪

♪ If you get caught between the moon and New York City ♪

♪ The best that you can do ♪

♪ The best that you can do ♪

♪ Is fall in love ♪

Hey, Ruby. Rube!

Yeah, I know, Mike.

"Staplehead."

Your hit. That was your hit, yeah?

This was it.

f*cking turn it up!

You don't have to, alright.

Doxxxology.

f*ck yeah!

I had this on CD.

Back in the day.

My daughter tells me I'm too old to rock,

but I say bullshit.

I work with Ruby Ruin!

Respect you, lady.

- Hey, Victor.
- Hey.

Tour time again.

You interested in some roadie work for a few weeks?

Man the merch table?

No. Sorry.

Ruby, you have a visitor

in the break room.

Hey. Uh, drummer, right?

Thanks for answering the ad.

I'm Ruby.

Yes, you are.

Wow.

This is ama... I'm Gavin.

Wow. Nice to meet you.

This is f*cking
amazing, dude, I'm...

Okay.

I've just been a
diehard Doxxx fan

since I was, like,
two years old.

Dude, this is f*ckin' badass.

My mom said she'd
catch me banging

my sippy cup to "Staplehead."

Just aaah!

Wow. That's...

When I saw the listing

to be the drummer of Doxxxology

on f*cking Craigslist,

I was just, just
what, dude, f*cking...

Alright, we leave Monday,
a three-week tour,

mostly bars and small venues,

but it'll give us time
to tighten up the act,

maybe write a few new songs,

'cause we end the
tour in Milwaukee,

at the Lariat,
opening for Krampus.

Holy sh*t, you're
opening for Krampus.

Yo, that's, that's badass, man.

- Yeah, it's a big deal.
- But hey...

if you guys are
looking to freshen up

your material at all,

I do a little bit of, like,
writing of my own stuff...

And you got your own gear?

Yeah, I've got a TAMA kit
with a double bass pedal

and a vintage amp, so
everything you need.

Great. But wait, no,

what the f*ck do
you need an amp for?

I blow my backing vocals
through my fuzz pedal,

and it gives it like this,

this crunchy,
chewy, disgusting...

Good. Fine.

Fine. You're in.

- I'm in?
- You're in.

Holy sh*t, dude.

Look at me now, m*therf*ckers!

This is gonna rock
so f*cking hard.

Thank you. Thank you so much.

I will not let you
down, I promise you.

Alright, RV leaves Monday.
I'll send you the deets.

Gavin, we're all in our 40s.

Just take a f*cking bath.

Take a bath. Aaahhhh!

I'm not joking.

Okay.

♪ Living on discount macaroni ♪

♪ Can't even get a job
with my uncle Tony ♪

♪ You sent your g*ons
to repo my truck ♪

♪ What the actual f*ck ♪

♪ I can play guitar and
I'm a decent singer ♪

♪ Now cut my wedding
ring off my dead finger ♪

♪ You say you wanna deal
but you're such a phony ♪

♪ You're never gonna
get that alimony ♪

Al! Al. God. Stop.

That's awful. God.

How's the divorce going, bro?

Not good.

The lyrics are temporary.

I just slug out
whatever's in my head,

we can zhuzh it up later.

There's no zhuzhing.
It's a turd.

I don't want to zhuzh the turd.

We have three weeks, man.

We got to come up with
something that's going

to pop at this Krampus show.

What's the point?

They're just gonna want
to hear "Staplehead."

The point, Eskie, is
that I'm not ready

to lay down and die as
some f*cking nostalgia act.

Are you?

I just moved back
in with my mom,

and I got my AARP
membership this year.

So it's been a
banner year for me.

And Al with his divorce.

It's not going well.

- And you think law school is gonna...
- Law school?

You think I can
afford law school?

It's an online MSL degree.

I can't even afford to sell out.

It's desperate times, Rube.

Piling in this shitty
van year after year

for the rest of our lives,

driving around
playing Irish pubs.

I swear to Christ,
I'm gonna start crying

I really think about it.

The goal is not this.

The goal is to get back.

To have sh*t acts like
Krampus opening for us.

That feeling on
stage, the crowd,

do you remember that?

We're metal gods.

What would you do
to get that back?

Anything.

- Anything.
- Anything.

We need to do this.

And all we need,

all we need is to
write one new song

that doesn't suck.

I had a kind of a doomy
sort of riff in A,

try this.

That's not bad.

Geez, where'd you get this kid?

Juilliard.

Really?

f*cking Craigslist.

Where do you think?

That's wild.

Let's see if Cleveland rocks!

So this tape line
goes right here.

- Okay.
- Not here.

- Mm-hmm.
- And not here.

- Okay.
- So I, so I don't hunch.

- Alright.
- I got a sciatica.

- I can't hunch.
- Okay.

Maggie May,

I ain't seen one of
these since Foghat.

Battle Creek, show
us your metal!

f*ckin' Benson, man.

Two, three, and...

♪ Merch girl ♪

♪ Working all night ♪

♪ Merch girl ♪

♪ Fits me just right ♪

♪ Merch girl ♪

♪ Last one to leave ♪

♪ Merch girl ♪

♪ Nothing up her sleeve, yeah ♪

- Alright. Okay.
- There's no bridge yet.

f*ck a bridge. What are
we, Christopher Cross?

Just power through it.

What do you think?
There's something there?

Deuteronomy, what do you
think? Something there?

I got my audiobooks on.

Hey, kid, what do you think?

Why don't you guys just
try to write another song

like "Staplehead"?

I mean, "Staplehead."
That song is, um, good.

So just try and, you know...

make another song like that.

Why don't I just f*cking
traipse into the f*cking forest

and capture a bejeweled
f*cking Pegasus?

That would be rad too.

Every second of every day,

I try and write a song
like "Staplehead."

I remember the first
time I heard it,

that feeling was like
a needle made of ice

going into my brain.

Like seeing the face of God

and f*cking God saying,

"That's what a f*cking
hit feels like."

I've been chasing that
feeling for the past 20 years

and never come close.

"Staplehead" 's a f*cking curse.

That song
ruined my life.

But the song is your big hit.

We didn't write it.

- What?
- Yeah, we didn't f*ckin' write it.

Our drummer Belinda did, and
she gets all the royalties.

Now that bitch is selling
leggings in the suburbs.

But you guys continue
to play the song.

We have to every gig. Have to.

And when we're not on stage,
we hear it everywhere.

And we don't get one red cent.

It's a f*cking curse.

f*ck that, though.

Tonight, we open
with "Merch Girl."

I got a feeling about this.

Two, three and...

♪ Merch girl ♪

♪ Nothing up her sleeve, yeah ♪

We suck.

Hey,

aren't you the band
that does "Staplehead"?

Play "Staplehead"!

No.

We're not playing "Staplehead."

♪ Up from the dust
above the ruins ♪

♪ By fire ♪

♪ By flood ♪

♪ Atop my rusty chariot ♪

- ♪ Lusting for your blood ♪
- Woo!

♪ Staplehead ♪

♪ Tonight is where you rise ♪

♪ Staplehead ♪

♪ Tonight we rise ♪

♪ Staplehead ♪

(singing falsetto):
♪ Tonight we rise ♪

♪ Staplehead ♪

Yeah! f*cking DeKalb, Illinois,

we love you!

Punk rock metal, baby.

Dude, are you okay?

Yeah, man, I'm f*cking good.

You little sh*t.

You ever steal my scream again,

I'll break more than
your f*cking face.

Hey!

Drummer boy.

Krampus!

Jesus. It's inane.

This will get you
popular these days,

this Jackass sh*t?

People love it.

Krampus Cam. They got
Ozzy with that thing once.

Dude, that was fake.

And what are you doing?

Our drummer got hit in the head

with a stapler
during "Staplehead."

That's what we call provenance.

Got a secret little eBay store.

It's not community
property. Don't tell Edward.

Kid's hanging with us tonight.

Let's party!

I got to be up
early, man, really.

Acid reflux, man.

Sober ten years.

Cool. Cool. Alright.

Hey, kid. I'm sorry
about tagging you.

Don't let that
sh*t happen again.

But I'm sorry.

Listen, th-that's me
totally out of bounds.

It's, it's your set. It's
your scream. I'm sorry.

And I know that I'm a lot
to put up with, you know,

but I just thank you guys

for puttin' up with me.

I mean, really.

And I know you guys are
looking for a new song,

and, um, I don't want
to overstep or anything,

but I wrote something and
if it sucks, it sucks.

Just let me know.
Just say it, no harm.

But I want you to hear it.

It's not like we
got anything else.

Tss...

Here we go.

What did you think, Ruby?

Uh...

Yeah, there's some
good stuff there, kid.

Keep working on it.

Seriously? Okay.

And I guess I will
leave you guys

to your own party or whatever.

Ha, ha, ha!

I'm gonna go to bed.
Good night, guys.

Holy sh*t.

I'm not crazy, right?

Tell me I'm crazy.

It's a f*ckin' hit.

It's gonna be "Staplehead"
all over again.

Doesn't have to be.

So I'm fired.

You're dragging the
energy of the band down.

We're trying to grow
wings, and you're...

You just, you're not on board.

How'd he take it?

He'll live.

Well, I broke my
sacred commitment

to veganism for this.

I got it, dudes, thank you.

Hey, kid.

Yo, what's up? Whoa...

When we play
"Staplehead" tonight...

Mm-hmm.

I want you to take my scream.

No, no, no, no, no.

That is not my...

- That's yours.
- You have earned it.

It's a f*ckin' honor, man.

I just need, I just
need a second if you...

(band playing "Merch Girl"

♪ Merch girl ♪

♪ Working every night ♪

♪ Merch girl ♪

♪ Fits me just right, yeah ♪

Alright.

Are you ready for a banger?!

♪ Up from the dust
above the ruins ♪

♪ By fire ♪

♪ By flood ♪

♪ Atop my rusty chariot ♪

♪ Lusting for your blood ♪

♪ Staplehead ♪

♪ From the blackest
depths of night ♪

♪ Staplehead ♪

♪ From the dark into the light ♪

♪ Staplehead ♪

Mm, do you have
another cigarette?

- Here you go.
- Aw, thanks, I appreciate that.

No problem.

I've got three
days on a deck job.

Manuel.

Jorge and your guys, Victor.

Eso...

- Tony.
- Vamos, amigos!

Nah, I'm good. I'm good.

Okay, that's it.

Hey. Hey, Charlie, right?

Uh, yeah.

Uh, Victor said you're
looking for work.

Oh well, thank you, Victor.

Uh, yes,

I'm, I'm desperately
looking for work.

You have a car?

Uh, yeah. Just needs gas.

And can you count?

Uh, got 10 good fingers.

My band's going on the
road, and we're looking

for someone to sell merch,

help out, you know,
whatever needs doing.

The pay sucks, but
you get to visit

the worst bars in America.

Well, sh*t.

You got yourself a merch girl.

Holy sh*t.

Uh, you're Ruby Ruin, right?

Staplehead!

Alright.

Let's see if Cleveland rocks!

So this tape line
goes right here.

Not here and, and not here.

- So I, so I don't hunch.
- Alright.

I got a sciatica.
I can't hunch.

♪ Merch girl ♪

♪ Nothing up her sleeve, yeah ♪

We suck.

Hey, aren't you the band

that does "Staplehead"?

Play "Staplehead."

No, we're not
playing "Staplehead."

♪ Up from the dust... ♪

Whoa!

- Kid...
- I'm just trying to get some more on my amp.

Dude, it's so badass!

Okay, okay.
Just... Jesus, kid.

- Just wait...
- Hold still.

It was so
intense tonight.

It was just so metal.

It was just metal.

- Yes, it was very metal.
- I thought it was metal, right?

It was very metal. It was...

super-duper metal.

- Yeah.
- Okay, just turn to the light a little.

There you go.

You, you think she's
mad at me, though.

Ruby? Uh, yeah.

On account of how she
punched you in the face.

But also, who cares?

I mean, don't get me started
on that "Merch Girl" song.

Slanderous.

I thought she was cool, man.

I'm starting to suspect
she's actually a real d*ck.

I know. Ruby's... she's cool.

She's, she's alright.

Mm, mm...

But maybe, um, maybe
tomorrow, I can,

I can catch a ride
with, with you?

If that's okay?

- Okay.
- Okay.

Gav.

Gav.

Gavin!

Jesus.

I admire the commitment
to the craft,

but maybe not with the
metal sticks, yeah?

I mean, Christ on a cr*cker.

Metal!

Oh, I get it. Oh... geez.

What, what's that thingy?

Oh, well,

I like to keep some eyes

underneath my kit at every show.

That way, I can go back...

and watch my footwork.

Alright.

Check one of these
out right here.

♪ Stalagmite! ♪

♪ Stalactite ♪

♪ Stalag-sight ♪

♪ You might stalag-me ♪

You, sir, are a magpie.

Magpie?

Mm-hmm.

Self-taught, huh?

No, Juilliard.

Oh.

Ugh. Alright, dude.

I don't want to be all
Felix Unger or anything,

but, uh, this is
my house, you know.

A little respect.

Why do you live in your car?

Wolves on my fender

so I gotta keep moving.

Some wolves, huh?

You going to be
like this forever?

Maybe.

I hadn't really thought
about it that way, I...

Not fully until
just now, actually.

So thanks for that fresh
dose of existential dread.

Oh, no, no. Toss it.

I do not consent to photos.

Well, it's not like I
post them or anything.

It's just for, like, a
mind-collage of my own.

Oh.

That was littering.

Yes, it was.

Gosh, you are just
really dedicated

to not wearing shoes, huh?

If you're wearing shoes,
you're just not grounded,

you know.

Life is a b*at, Chuck.

You got to feel it.

Hey, look. See?

Ba-da-da-whoosh.
Ba-da-da-whoosh.

- Right?
- Ba-da-da-whoosh. Alright.

Look, see?

That's the bridge we went over.

You know? Little raindrops.

Holistic magpie m*therf*cker.

Yeah. Sometimes I just,
I feel this sh*t so hard.

Carries me through.

Makes the bad stuff just...

roll right off of me.

Hi.

I owe you one for taking
that little shitheel

off our hands for the day.

You know, that kid really
took a hit for you, right?

God, I hope he didn't lose
any precious brain cells.

You might give him a break.

Is all I'm sayin'.

He's a vibe-k*ller.

Can't read a room.
It stresses me out.

He's just nervous.

He worships you.

I got to tell you,
Ruby, I really thought

that being on tour with the
band was going to be like,

you know, one big party,
all fun and bonding,

like... Spinal Tap.

Pre-Jeanine.

Not this cliquey

gate-keepy high school bullshit.

Consider my eyes
opened.

Hey!

Drummer boy.

Dude, I don't know
what kind of voodoo,

whatever you did,

but thank you.

What voodoo did I do?

Well, I saw you talking
to Ruby last night,

and now she's gonna
let me do the scream.

The "Staplehead" scream.

I've been dreaming
doing it since I was

a little dumb-as-f*ck baby.

This is, this is
f*ckin' everything, man.

- Thank you.
- Yeah, yeah...

Hey. So, um...

- Oh. Uh, uh...
- You...

I'll, I'll get a
good one for you.

I'm happy for you,
you little scamp.

Alright, let's do
some f*ckin' metal.

♪ Atop my rusty chariot ♪

♪ Lusting for your blood ♪

♪ Staplehead ♪

♪ Staplehead ♪

♪ Tonight we rise ♪

♪ Staplehead ♪

♪ Tonight we rise ♪

- ♪ Staplehead ♪
- Let 'em have it, kiddo.

♪ Tonight we rise ♪

♪ Staplehead ♪

♪ Tonight we rise ♪

I know it's been a
tough night for you all.

We appreciate your patience.

The ME's ruling your drummer
d*ed by electrocution.

His amp wasn't grounded.

So when he touched the mic,

it was like kissing
a lightning bolt.

Jesus.

It was an accident
due to faulty equipment.

We're impounding the amp
for insurance purposes,

but you can have the rest
of your equipment back.

You all were on that stage, too.

It could have been a lot worse.

Wow.

Guess we just got lucky.

Good idea.

What do you figure I can
get for these on eBay?

Don't you f*ckin' dare.

I can't stop
smelling that smell.

We did what we did. Now
we gotta move forward.

That song is gonna
change our lives.

Let's keep it together.

About that.

We should get a
recording of the song,

at least a rough demo,

before we play it
at the Krampus show.

We can use his rhythm track,
but we all play the rest.

Really lock in our ownership.

Then let's do it
right f*ckin' now.

And where are we gonna
find a recording studio

in Kenosha, Wisconsin,
"right f*cking now"?

Two, three...

♪ It's a flash inside
that calls you ♪

♪ From the street ♪

♪ Drink from the
well so bittersweet ♪

♪ It's sugary sweet
it's a fiery treat ♪

♪ It's time to eat
my sucker punch ♪

Judas to the Priest.
That song's pretty good.

Oh, uh, excuse me. Are
you with this group?

Because I have
this booth reserved

as of seven minutes ago.

Oh yeah. I think
they're almost done.

"m*rder Girl."

Nice.

Is your band, uh,

death metal or something?

It's my podcast.
I solve murders.

Oh.

Nice work, if you can get it.

Charlie: (singing) ♪
Enter the caverns ♪

♪ Of the past ♪

♪ Your first trip
won't be your last ♪

♪ It's sugary sweet,
a fiery treat ♪

♪ It's time to eat
my sucker punch ♪

Damn, that is an earworm.

Whoa.

Oh geez. Come on.

Hey. Which one of you assholes

Shamrock-Shaked my car?

- Krampus slays!
- What is this?

Oh my god. Just clean it.

-Oh, hi. Excuse me. Hi. Uh, hi.
-Hello.

Do you know my friend Molly?

- I'm sorry, who?
- Uh, Molly.

- You know, my ex.
- Okay, n-n-nice try, narc.

I-I'm not a narc. I...

You're wearing pleated
khakis, you know.

Just try harder.
I believe in you.

- Krampus!
- Uh, excuse me...

Very good...

Ah, damn it, Gavin.
Respect the domicile.

Geez, honey.

You're in Krampus land!

Oh, whoa.

Hold the phone.

♪ Step into the
caverns of the past ♪

♪ Your first sip
won't be your last ♪

♪ It's sugary sweet
a fiery treat ♪

♪ It's time to eat
my sucker punch ♪

Magpie.

Oh, great. Uh, I
want to talk to you.

Drop the price of the
shirts if you have to.

I don't wanna bring
any of that sh*t home.

You know, it-it's
about your new song.

- What about it?
- Well, it's really good.

Which is how I know you
guys didn't write it.

I got a soundcheck.

Okay, just look me in the eyes

and tell me that Gavin
didn't write that song?

Gavin wrote that song.

Oh. Well, that's true.

But also not cool.
He deserves credit.

And what do we deserve?

That song isn't going
to bring Gavin back,

but it'll change our lives.

We recorded the song.
We're playing it tonight.

Look, Charlie, I'm just
trying to make something good

out of something bad.

Well, right, but,

but if it's Gavin's song,
people should know that.

There are a thousand ifs.

If I hadn't given
him the scream,

if our roadie hadn't
quit and checked the amp,

if I had anything left
in my garbage life

except one last sh*t.

This sh*t.

It is what it is,
and I'm taking it.

I'm sorry about the kid,

truly.

Gotta go.

Something doesn't
sit right, Gavin.

Krampus!

- sh*t.
- Whoa!

Ooh!

- Okay...
- Krampus in the crapper!

Good sh*t, man. That
dude's an assh*le.

Deuteronomy.

Yeah, merch girl!

Deuteronomy.

Nice right hook, merch girl.

I see you're moving
up in the world, huh?

- Is that why you quit?
- Quit?

I got canned on some bullshit.

Huh.

Well, you know, I knew that
Ruby threw a lie in there.

I just couldn't track the, uh...

This business is built
on relationships.

And amphetamines.

Can I ask you something?
It's, uh, it's about the kid.

The thing that
happened with his amp.

I mean, is that
something that happens?

Yeah, it happens.

Yardbirds, '77.

Lead guitarist bit it
using the same amp.

That's why they have
a death capacitor.

A what?

Old amps used to have
cords with two prongs

instead of three.

If you reverse the plug,

it's like sticking
a fork in a socket.

A death capacitor keeps it safe.

- So Gavin didn't know that?
- Of course, he did.

He had his amp converted
to three-prong.

It was safe. I wouldn't have
let him use it if it wasn't.

Here, let me show you
what it looks like.

Okay, here's one
on eBay. Identical.

Holy sh*t. Can I,
can I see that?

Whoa, sh*t.

Al.

♪ I'm gonna
buy a new guitar ♪

♪ Neck inlaid with pearl ♪

♪ To pay my passage
to the underworld ♪

♪ I'm gonna crawl up ♪

♪ From the afterbirth ♪

♪ And wander lonely ♪

♪ On this earth ♪

♪ Satan, cast your evil spell ♪

♪ Save a place for us in hell ♪

♪ You must learn
we're all gonna burn ♪

♪ Because you can't
un-m*rder someone ♪

♪ We electrocuted a lamb for
the keys to the kingdom ♪

♪ Now it's time to burn ♪

Two, three, four.

If you're looking for
Al, he's working on

a new song called "You
Can't Un-m*rder Someone."

Sounds metal.

It sounds like a
guilty conscience

unburdening itself
for k*lling a drummer

via power ballad.

What?

That song

is basically a confession.

Uh, yeah. Okay. So you
wanna arrest Bob Marley

for singing "I
sh*t the Sheriff"?

If he was also selling
Gavin's amp on eBay,

like Al is, then yeah.

I know it sounds
nuts, but I think

that Al switched it out
for a booby-trapped amp

and k*lled Gavin.

Listen. I know you
really liked the kid.

You're traumatized.
We all are.

But reality now,
equipment mix-ups happen.

Deuteronomy wasn't
there to check it.

- Convenient, right?
- Jesus.

Al was on stage the
whole time Gavin was.

You think he would have
risked electrocuting himself?

Or Eskie or me?

Well that's true. Huh.

Huh?

One more show,

and this will all be in
your rearview mirror.

Okay?

Chill out and keep it together.

Yeah?

- What are you doing?
- You put Gavin's amp on eBay?

It's vintage.

It's evidence. Right?

- I guess.
- You guess?

I haven't taken
Criminal Law yet.

Okay, Clarence Dumbass
and Veggie McShithead.

Listen to me.

We are this close to
nailing this thing.

Keep it the f*ck together!

And do not confess
to m*rder in a song!

What...?

It's probably okay as long as
you don't sing it under oath.

This is what, ehh, I'm saying...

Uh, hey, Deuteronomy.

Um, can I borrow your readers?

You know, I'm trying to see
something on here, and I can't.

No. But how about the
right tool for the job?

Oh, okay. Upgrade.

Huh? Okay.

So Al was being a real baby

about setting up his
mic stand, right?

Yeah.

Said it was his
hunchback or something.

I tried to teach him the Pilates

I learned from Jimmy Page

but no!

Okay. So look at this.

This is from the
show when Gavin d*ed.

Look at the tape.

Somehow in this show,
on this one night,

he got taller.

Huh, I...

Well, so what? Maybe he
wore different shoes?

I mean, why would a
guy with a bad back

suddenly wear new
shoes on stage?

Hmm.

Well, you can't see
his shoes there though.

Oh.

Huh.

Hey. I-I-I come in peace, I...

Ca-can I borrow that?

Come on, now.

Show me some heavy-soled
m*rder shoes.

Gotcha, you son of a bitch.

Whoa!

Holy Toledo.

Rest in metal. Seriously?

Jesus. What now?

You guys are sick with
this bullshit tribute.

You k*lled him. All of you.

Who the f*ck do
you think you are?

Me? Oh, I don't know.

Maybe, maybe I'm
the highest bidder

on eBay for Gavin's real amp,

you know, the one you
switched out to k*ll him.

Or maybe I'm the girl with
the photographic proof

that you knew he was
going to be electrocuted.

You're all wearing Docs
with thick rubber soles

to insulate you from
that electro sh*t

that you sent through Gavin.

You know, when you
told the fire inspector

that you got "lucky,"
I knew it was a lie,

I just didn't put it together.

Y'all made your own
luck, didn't you?

You know, I may
not have my degree,

but even I know that's
not legal proof.

Gavin was the real
deal, you know,

and he was a good guy,

and you k*lled
him just for what?

For some stupid little
song about sucker punching?

It's not just a
song. It's a hit.

You know what, Ruby?

I knew that you were a has-been.

But it's worse than that.

Alright, you're a hack.

And maybe I won't get to see
you in an orange jumpsuit,

but you'll be in that
orange "Build Box" apron

for the rest of your
sad little hacky life.

Security!

Gavin had talent,
okay. He was metal.

He was real metal.

And you all, you're
the opposite of metal.

Alright? You're talc.

You hear me? You're
f*ckin' talc!

She can't do sh*t.

We play the f*ck out
of that song tonight

and everything changes.

Yes?

Let's rock!

Hey, do you mind swinging past

just over here? Uh...

Thank you. Thanks. I just...
I got to grab my, my bag,

and then I promise to continue
to throw myself out, so...

I better not see you again.

No, absolutely.
I appreciate you.

You're doing good
work. Efficient.

Hi. Hey, guys.

Any of you know my friend Lucy?

You know Lucy in the Sky...

f*ck off, narc.

Okay. Just looking for
some old-fashioned cocaine.

Hey, narc.

My name's Scott.

And that's
how Doxxxology

m*rder*d their drummer Gavin,

I don't know his last
name, for a song.

Yeah, uh, well, that's,
uh, that's a, a lot.

Ah.

I got no proof.

It's a whole lot of nothing.

Just loose, connected
dots. I'm sorry.

I don't know who I thought
would take this seriously.

Y-y-you know what?
I think it's good.

- You do?
- Yeah.

I think you make
a compelling case.

I mean, some of
this is a stretch,

but you've shored up a lot of
the circumstantial evidence.

I'm convinced.

You think it's enough
to take to your boss?

Why would you want me to take it

to the VP of Finance
at Nationwide?

Okay, wait. So
you're not a cop?

No, I'm an actuary. Did
you think I was a cop?

Yes, man. Yeah, I
thought you were a narc.

Everyone's been calling me that.

I think I'm just really
bad at buying dr*gs.

Yes, you are really bad at it.

Well, if it makes
you feel any better,

everything you just said
makes perfect sense.

Oh, and since you're
already famous,

maybe you can get some
local news attention.

Hmm? What do you
mean I'm famous?

You don't know.
Oh, your video.

It went viral.

Krampus!

When did that go up?

Uh, it says four
hours ago. Why?

Charlie Cale?

Hey, Cliff.

I didn't take you
for a TikToker.

It's over, Charlie.
You're coming with me.

Front seat or the
trunk. Your choice.

Hey. You need
something, brother?

What's up, Milwaukee?!

I think it's time
for something fresh.

♪ It's a flash inside ♪

♪ That calls you
from the street ♪

♪ Drink from the
well so bittersweet ♪

♪ You wrote your number on
the back of my receipt ♪

♪ Before you cracked
me with your ♪

♪ Sucker punch ♪

♪ Step into the
caverns of the past ♪

♪ Your first sip
won't be your last ♪

♪ It's sugary sweet,
it's a fiery treat ♪

- ♪ It's time to eat my ♪
- f*ck you, Ruby.

♪ Sucker punch ♪

To the left.

Watch it, man.

Oh f*ck!

Thank you!

Ruby! Ruby! Ruby!

I like shrimp
cocktail for breakfast.

This is, I can get used to this.

My friends, in just three weeks,

you've conquered the world

To "Sucker Punch."

- To Doxxxology.
- Hey.

A viral smash.

We got to get
caviar in the rider.

I want this on the tour bus.

Like, I can get used to this.

This is my new style.

But I can keep
this pen though, right?

Hold up.

Wait.

No.

What the f*ck, man?

We have a big problem.

Yeah. So this
"Sucker Punch" song

came out of nowhere,
and it's everywhere now.

But did it come out of
nowhere? It did not.

Shout out to some of our
older viewers for helping us

connect the dots on this one.

You ripped off the
theme song to "Benson"

and didn't think
nobody would notice?

- I didn't realize it.
- It's,

it's, it's fair use homage.

It's copyright infringement
that was about to become fraud.

And it is the least
of your problems.

You may know the
heavy metal band Doxxxology

for their '90s hit
song "Staplehead."

And for their incredible
comeback hit "Sucker Punch."

Their story sounds like
a rock-and-roll fantasy.

A band of has-beens who get
their second sh*t at fame.

But what if I told you
that's not the whole story?

Would you k*ll for a
second sh*t at fame?

Commit m*rder for one hit song.

Welcome to season
seven of "m*rder Girl:

Rest in Metal."

Ba-da-da-whoosh.

We got her.

Wow, something to
look forward to.

I'm in some deep sh*t.

What went wrong?

She k*lled both of them.

She was lying. I could tell.

You thinking what I'm thinking?

We have to k*ll that mother...

Tell me where you are.

I can't
be the only one

getting bad mojo around here.

There's not a corner in this country

small enough for you to hide in.

And I'm gonna hit you where it hurts.

Now, tell me, kid...

am I lying?

Watch your back, Charlie.

Look out!

That was intense.

I felt like I was in "Wolf of Wall Street" all of a sudden

and not the fun parts.
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