01x04 - Monstrous Makeover / A Wing and a Scare

[bunniefuu]

( Clock chiming, thunderclap )

( Creaking )

( Owl hooting )

( Shrieking )

( Crying )

( Gasps )

( Screaming )

'Fess up, slimeballs!

[Captioning sponsored

By nickelodeon

And the u.s. Departmen

Of education]

( Needle scratching record )

( Chuckles )

( Insects skittering )

Ugh, cockroaches.

Darn light bulb.

( Humming )

( Low growling )

Hello, is someone there?

( Clucking tongue )

( Creaking )

Dr. Mittendoll, is that you?

This isn't funny, you know.

You're not scaring me!

( Snarling )

( Gasping )

( Yelling )

( Snarling )

No!

No!

No!

No aw!

Oh!

Look at how cute you are!

Are you

Somebody's bunny?

Oh, just look a

That snooky-wooky cheeks!

A bunny rabbit, a bunny rabbit!

Do I look like

A bunny rabbit to you?

( Groans )

Who can ea

At a time like this?

( Loud whining )

Stop crying.

I'll give you

A break on the bill.

You'll learn to love it.

( Snorting )

These people

Are calling you

"The monster doctor."

Ingrates.

You give a man an extra nostril

You'd think

He'd thank you.

We've got a waiting room

Full of frightened people.

Frightened people!

This is my lucky day!

How dare you

Question my ability.

My senses are just as sharp

As they've ever been, and

Stop smiling!

( Groans )

( Crowd chanting in distance )

( Growling )

Nurse:

Somebody's bunny?

( Cackling )

( Laughing uncontrollably )

Class oh

Class dismissed!

( Class laughing )

I'll deal with you tomorrow!

Tomorrow

Ickis ( panting ):

Do you have any idea

What it's like

To be called cute?

You mean, do I know

What it's like to jump ou

At someone

On a dark foggy nigh

And do this

( Growling and snarling )

Only to have them

Laugh in my face?

Yes, yes, exactly!

No. But I suspect it's,

It's quite humiliating.

What's that?

A human dictionary. I'm looking

Up "snooky-wooky cheeks."

Maybe it's a good thing.

Ickis, you are making

A fool of yourself.

Don't you mean a cute fool?

Whoa. Don't get all

Slimed out over this.

Oh, easy for you to say.

You've go

Your horrendous stench.

Oblina can reach

Deep inside herself.

What about me?

You've got us to help you.

When the gromble chews me up

And takes a

Thousand years to digest me?

Uh, unfortunately

I do have plans tomorrow.

( Sobbing )

What's the use?

( Whining ):

I'll never be a good monster!

( Squeaking )

( Moaning )

( Panting )

What was that?

The power

Of positive stinking.

You are as stinky

As you believe you can be.

Maybe you're right.

Why shouldn't I be as scary

As any monster here?

You're a lean, mean

Scaring machine.

Hmm, I guess

I am sort of scary, huh?

Frightening!

Frightening?

( Chuckling ):

I like that, I like that!

I pity the fool that goes to

Sleep with me under his bed.

That's the spirit!

You're bad, ickis, real bad!

( Screeching ):

I'm bad!

Huh? Oh, bad. Bad!

Bad is not half of what I am.

I am the ugliest

Slimiest

Razor-fanged, sharp-clawed

Monster menace

This side of newark!

Good show!

( Cackling ):

I'm feelin' good!

( Chuckling ):

Go with the feeling!

Why don't we go above ground

And let ickis show his stuff?

Sounds like a plan.

Lead the way!

( Woman talking on loudspeaker )

Thar she blows.

Just point me

In the right direction.

( Stamping and clicking )

( Crying )

Okay, new strategy.

Let's make this

A little easier.

Maybe we should call it a day.

Don't quit on us now.

Where's the scariest monster

Menace this side of newark?

He got priced and pu

On display in aisle 12.

I know, I know,

Think positively.

( Crying loudly )

( Ickis growling )

( Cooing softly )

Ickis:

I told you I'm hopeless.

Why are you torturing

Me like this?

Don't be silly.

You are simply

Having an off day.

You mean an off life.

I think you like feeling

Sorry for yourself.

That is not true.

Then prove it!

Give this scare

Everything you have got.

Fine! Then let's go

Into the closet.

I do my best work

From there.

Does he have a prayer?

This poor chap has

A nervous disorder.

He's scared of everything.

( Chuckling ):

Great!

All clear-- come on, don.

( Frightened muttering )

( Screams )

Don, it's just a chair.

Now, come on.

I, uh, i, i, I

R-really like rice.

I know you do, don.

Now, come on,

It's time for

Your nappy.

( Frightened muttering )

No nap! Rice.

It's okay, don.

Nap is like rice.

Rice is good.

Yes, it is.

Sweet dreams, don.

Sweet dreams, heh-heh, yes.

Rice. Heh-heh, good.

( Teeth chattering )

Don't think so

Much, just do it.

I'm with krumm.

Give it your all,

And then let's be off.

I've got a scare

Of my own to do.

Today is the first day

Of the rest of my life.

This is going to be good.

( Chuckling )

( Inhaling

And growling )

Mmm

Daddy.

( Grunting and gasping )

( Snorting

And laughing )

( Laughing )

Ickis:

Oh, fine!

Laugh all you want.

But you won't be laughing

When you see the new ickis.

Where are you going?

( Chuckling ):

What do you mean

The new ickis?

You'll see.

( Water splashing )

( Man grunting, wrench turning )

Now, where is that dipstick?

( Horn honking )

( Groaning )

It's just no

The same without ickis.

Yeah.

He blows a mean horn.

Perhaps laughing

Wasn't the nicest thing to do.

It was funny, though.

Patients of a man

Known as "the monster doctor"

Are staging a protest.

Let's see

If I can get a comment.

"Monster doctor?"

Ma'am, why the protest?

( Gasps )

You have three nostrils!

No kidding.

Look at what

This guy did to me!

I'd know those ears anywhere.

Could that be

It's ickis.

What is he doing there?

There you have it.

An incompetent doctor took

Basically normal people

And changed them into twisted,

Repulsive, horrifying

Sorry.

Is he doing

What I think he's doing?

Not if we can

Get to him first. Come on!

( Snoring )

I i-i'm not talking

To reporters.

Can't you see I'm busy?

I've seen what you can do,

And I want your help.

Well, it's nice to mee

Someone who appreciates my work.

Anything special in mind?

Give me the works.

Method of payment?

Payment?

Moolah, dinero,

Shekels, cabbage?

Um, I can get you

Plenty of cabbage.

It's kind of old.

What's the difference?

Still green, right?

And brown.

Whatever.

When would you like

To schedule it?

Right now.

Thumb through these pictures.

I can probably

Fit you in

Before my court date

This afternoon.

Oh, whoops,

Didn't realize the time.

I'll just make it up as I go.

The surprise is half the fun.

( Gasping )

( Camera clicking )

Haven't you reporters

Heard of a door?

I'll take that.

( Laughing )

( Sniffing )

Smell something?

( Sniffing )

Wow!

Phew!

( Thud )

( Snoring )

What are you guys doing here?

Stopping you from

Making a big mistake.

When this is over

I will be the scariest monster

In the academy's history.

Can't let you do it.

Come on, buddy.

I know what I'm doing.

If you're my friends

You'll go away and

Let me do what I have to.

Krumm, let him go.

Look at him.

Isn't I

Obvious?

He'll never be a good monster.

Huh?

He is kind of cute.

No matter what you do

To your looks

You'll never be

Much of a monster.

I thought you were my friends.

Isn't it obvious?

It's what's inside

That makes you a monster.

You just don'

Have the stuff.

How can you guys say that?

I'm only telling you

The truth, ickis.

Scary-looking or not,

I'm afraid you have

No business

Being in monster school.

Yeah,

Snooky-wooky cheeks.

( Growling )

( Yelling )

( People screaming )

How'd you know

That would work?

I read a book once

On reverse psychology.

Doctor:

Hey!

You ever thought of

Changing those lips?

Can you believe it?

'Cause I can't.

It's hard to believe--

Get me the viewfinder,

'Cause I am a real monster.

( Rumbling )

What was that?

Is it supposed to do that?

Man:

This is going to be the greates

Dedio family vacation ever.

Woman:

Why are we going

To wisconsin again?

Man:

The new cheese tour alone

Is three days.

( Moans )

Dad, dusty put a frog in my bag.

( Croaking )

( Giggling )

I never saw

Anybody jump so high.

( Cackling )

There she is-- our assignment.

She doesn't look so tough.

I wonder why

The gromble picked her.

Because she is hard to scare

And we need the extra credit.

Especially you.

Mr. Dedio:

Ooh, where is that video camera?

I have it.

Our escapades shall

Not go unrecorded.

This is going

To be a piece of cake.

With worms, I hope.

Let's not ge

Overconfident, guys.

We got work to do.

Let's see.

I'll take

This and this and this

And this and this and this.

That ought to do it.

Oblina:

A suitcase.

Ooh, this will be perfect.

We can hide in here

Until she returns.

( Laughing )

Ah-ha!

( Grunting )

Ow! What's going on?

( Groaning )

Caught like rats in a trap.

These humans are even more

Fiendish than I thought. Oh!

Ouch.

Come on, dedios.

We are out of here.

What do we do now?

Just sit tight.

She'll get the scare of her life

When she opens this.

Good evening, sir.

Destination?

Milwaukee, wisconsin.

Oh, boy, sir.

You are in for

The thrill of a lifetime.

Don't we know it!

( Snoring )

( Airplane taking off )

( Roaring )

Krumm:

Hey, it stopped.

Thank goodness.

What if they leave us

In here forever?

I'm getting out.

( Grunting )

Allow me.

We must be

In the closet.

Man:

What would you say

If I offered you

$1 Million to have your wife

Make me a cheese omelette?

With fine wisconsin

Cheddar, of course?

What an odd den.

Let's get out.

Look at all the humans.

What about the little girl?

We've got to scare

The living daylights out of her.

Well, at least it's dark.

Okay.

All you little darlings

Say cheese, now.

Wisconsin cheddar, of course.

There you go.

( Mooing )

( Gasping )

There she is.

Here goes.

( Yelping )

So much for that idea.

Hmm.

What's this?

( Gulping )

Mm, these air sick bags

Really work.

I want a comic book

And I want it now.

Okay, honey, go on

Back to your sea

And I'll bring

You one right away.

( Groaning )

That's her.

Watch this.

( Giggling )

Okay, here's the special meal

You requested, sir.

And here's a comic book for you.

Yecch. I forgot wha

Airline food was like.

( Thunder )

Uh-oh.

The weather's getting rough.

I hate airplanes.

Sometimes planes

Fall out of the air

For no reason.

Stop it!

( Falsetto ):

Would you

Like anything?

You stink.

And where are my crayons?

I want to draw a plane crash.

Could I have--

( Screaming )

M-m-m-monster!

( Grunting )

Whoops. Great.

Now what am I going to do?

Hey.

There's gum under the chair.

Stay here, I'll get 'em.

Something the matter,

Little man?

No, please!

You're not a monster.

Uh, sorry.

I wonder.

Could you possibly

Be more of a geek?

Huh. Where'd this come from?

Thanks, ickis.

This house is moving.

We should get out.

We are not quitting yet.

Leave it to me.

Flight attendant:

We're encountering turbulence.

The captain has turned on

The "fasten seat-belt" sign.

( Grunting )

( Dinging )

( Footsteps approaching )

Okay, we can quit now.

We'll come back when

They don't have company.

How do we get out of here?

Did you see

What I saw?

Would one of you boys

Be so kind as to flush me?

( Flushing )

Wow! These new models

Really go fast.

Help!

( Screaming )

Where are we?

This isn't the dedio's.

We are way up in the air.

Whoa!

I'm scared of heights.

Calm down.

I don't believe

We are more than

A few miles up.

I feel sick.

Ickis:

This is no time

To give in to fear.

Did you say "a few miles"?

( All screaming )

Hey, look!

( Groaning )

Are you thinking

What I'm thinking?

Absolutely.

Go for it!

( Screaming )

What is it, worm-brain?

Oh, don't tell me you're

Scared of a cloud now?

You are hopeless.

Get me out of here!

There's something

Wrong with engine two.

We're losing altitude.

We are experiencing

Engine difficulty.

There is a possibility we may be

Touching ground prematurely.

( All screaming )

Curdled goo!

It worked.

Krumm:

Help!

Excellent work, ickis,

They were positively terrified.

Krumm:

Get me out of here.

Did you hear that?

What?

I'm stuck.

Don't worry.

It looks like

We will be on the ground

In no time.

( Screaming )

( Grunting )

Hey! Engine two is back on line!

Thank you! Thank you!

Thank you.

( All sighing )

( Groaning and sighing )

It's all over, dusty.

There's no reason

To be scared now.

( Jabbering and stammering )

( Crowd cheering and clapping )

Gromble:

So, the entire planeload

Full of humans

Was scared,

Terrified, petrified.

Do you know wha

They were scared of?

( Gasping )

Airplanes!

They're supposed to be

Scared of monsters

Not airplanes.

Monsters!

Do you know what that means?

( Gasping )

There must be

A better way to travel.

( Jet engines roaring )