03x17 - I'm Gonna Get You Kenan

[bunniefuu]

Oh, here it goes.

♪ Everybody out there
go run and tell ♪

♪ Your homeboys
and homegirls ♪

♪ It's time for
kenan and kel ♪

♪ They'll keep you laughing
in the afternoon ♪

♪ So don't touch that dial,
don't leave the room ♪

♪ Because they're always
into somethin' fun ♪

♪ And you don't
want to miss it ♪

♪ It's double k
like do the good way ♪

♪ Kenan and kel, or should
I say kel and kenan? ♪

♪ Then you gotta
watch kenan ♪

♪ 'Cause kenan be scheming
with a plan or a plot ♪

♪ To make it to the top ♪

♪ But they're kinda
in the middle ♪

♪ Because they're always
gettin' caught ♪

♪ This ain't the hardy boys
or nancy drew mystery ♪

♪ It's just kenan and kel
in your vicinity ♪

♪ Like sigfried and roy
or abbott and costello ♪

♪ Magic and kareem
or penn and teller ♪

♪ Somebody's in trouble?
Oh, here it go ♪

♪ On nick nick nick nick
nick nick nick nick ♪

Captioning made possible by
nickelodeon
and u.s. Department of education

Wow! Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah!

Wow. Welcome to the
kenan and kelprogram.

The name on my student
i.d. Says kenan!

And the name in
my underwear says
I'm kel.

Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.

All right!
Well, everybody
get ready for fun,

'Cause we got
a great show for
y'all tonight.

That's right.
We got a great show.
See, in tonight's show,

Kenan and I become
crime-fighting
superheros!

That's right.
Dedicated to
fighting evil
grasshoppers.

What are you
talking about, man?

None of that
stuff happens in
tonight's episode.

I know,
but I always wanted
to be a crime-
fighting superhero.

I even have my
own superhero
helmet!

Check it out!

[Trumpet flourish]yeah!

Ooh!

What do you
think, hah?
Hah?

Kel, what kind
of superhero
goes around

Wearing a goofy
helmet like
that one?

The kind that
get his super
powers from
drinking orange soda!

Yeah!

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.
Now behold...

The power of
the orange.

Hey...ay...

Huh! Aah!

Ahh!

Uh, kel...

Why don't you save
the energy for
tonight's show, because,

Uh, you're
gonna need it.

[Cheers, applause]

Oh-ho-ho!

Now, come on now!

Hey-hey!

Oh!

Whoa!

Hey, kenan!

How'd you do that?

Man! I think I'm gonna
need a hand doctor.

Ahh, here it goes!

Hi, chris![Gasps]

So what are you
sneaking up on me
like that for?

I just came in
and said hi.

All right.
I'm sorry.

I'm just a little jumpy.
This jackhammer guy
has got me
all nervous!

Jackhammer?

Yes, the jackhammer's
a dangerous criminal!

He's already robbed
other grocery
stores in the area!

For real? Man!

Well, I'd like to see
the jackhammer try to
come into rigby's,

Boy, sure, 'cause...

I just would.

Hey, rigby's!
What's up?

Haven't you
heard?
Nah.

The jackhammer
is on the loose!

The jackhammer's
on the loose?

Not the
jackhammer!

Aah! Not the jackhammer.
What am I gonna do?!

Do you even know
who the jackhammer is?

Maybe.

Kel, the jackhammer
is a dangerous thief.

See, there's
his picture!

Lemme see.
Uh-huh, lemme see.

Hey, I can't
get this
thing open.

Ooh. It's
the jackhammer!

[Both screaming]

I got the jackhammer!

Come on, kel!
Oh, man!

Kel, stop!

Kel.

That's not
the jackhammer, man!

The jackhammer's
a mean, scary,
tough-looking man.

And...that's a nun.

Oh.

Hey, wait.
Wait, nun.

All right.
Let's just get
back to work.

Kenan, could you
grab the produce
boxes from the back?

Kel, please don't
tackle any more nuns.

All right.
Mmm-mmm.

Hah,
lemme see.

Ah! "Wanted.

John the jackhammer
rogan."

Baldy and his
beady eyes. He's
like "I see you!"

I see you!
Ha-ha!

Baldy-head, hey,
what's up, man?

Look at him now.
He is so ugly!

Look at his
bald head.

Aw, look at the
hair on his chin.
It's like a--just
a wet squirrel.

Just, "I'm wet."

Ha-ha-ha, look at that.
Whoo! Soda time.

Oh, man.

Oh, oh. Welcome
to rigby's. How
might--[gasp]

Gimme all
your money!

Oh!

The hammer!
[Whimpers]

Chris, could
you be quiet?
I'm tryin' to open
my orange soda.

Hurry it up!

I'm
hurrying!

Please don't
hurt me!

No hurt!

Is there
a back way
outof here?

[Whimpering]
ye-ess!

Rogan!

Hey! Isn't that
the jackhammer?

Yes!

I think you
knocked him out!

Now, in your
own words, mr. Potter,

Could you tell
us what happened?

Certainly.

I remember it
like it was yesterday.

It just
happened today.

Who's telling
the story?

You are!

It started out
like any other day.

Everything seemed normal.

But, you know,
in my line of work

You have to be
ready for anything.

I was at the counter,
counting some money,
of course,

And, you see,
what happened...

All right.
This is a robbery!

Gimme all
your money!

I maintained my calm.

My nerves were like, ah, er...

Calm!

I looked him
right in the eye,
and I said:

I don't think so!

You picked
the wrong store
to rob this time.

Yah!

Hah! Hee, hee!

[Whispering]
is there a
back way out
of here?

[Whimpering]

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-
ha-ha-ha!

So, thanks to my
amazing bravery,

And kenan's lucky timing,

The jackhammer was caught!

In fact,
I gotta tell you.

That jackhammer
isn't so tough.

[Growls]
aah!

Man, that is not
what happened at all.

Why don't you tell
me the way it really
happened, then.

See, I was in
the back room, right,
grabbing some boxes,

When all of
a sudden,

I sensed danger!

Hmm.

I sense danger.

Kenan, v.o.: So I'm thinking
I better go to the front of
the store and check it out.

I better go to the front of
the store and check it out.

Ah-ha-ha-ha-
ha-ha-ha!

Hey!

You leave him alone!

Ha! You gonna
make me?

Yes.
Ooh!

Yes, I am.

[Growling]

Now I'm angry!

[Both grunting]

[Whimpering]

How about we
go for a little
spin, huh!

[Grunting]

Kenan, v.o.: And that's when
the supermodel rushed in.

My hero!

Hey, girl.
How are you doing?

I ain't seen
you in awhile.

You miss me?

Oh, kenan.
You're so brave
and boyishly handsome.

I've never seen
such a strong--

All right, all right.
Are you sure that's
exactly what happened?

Well, you know,
all except for
the supermodel part.

And the bread
fighting and spinning.

But--but I did.
I knocked him out.
I did!

Hey, everybody!
Look what these
keys do.

Oh, look,
mr. Jack-a-hammer.
The door's open!

Aw, it's closed.

Oh, oh. Oh, wait--
it's open!

Oh! Closed.

Ha-ha. Hey.
Wanna come out?

Would you please
cut that out?

Boy! What's
his problem?

Rude!

Whoo!

What's
happening?

Why don't you tell me
what yousaw today.

Oh, ok.

Well, I went into rigby's,
like I do every day.

And I went to go
get some orange soda.

♪ You got a weakness ♪

Kel...
Drink me!

Who said that?

It's me.
The orange soda.

I want you to drink me!

But--but...orange soda
bottles can't talk.

Yes, we can.

Open me up.
Taste my
orange goodness!

O-kay!

Whoo! Oh, wait.
It's stuck!

I--i can't open you.

This can't be happening!

No, no, please. No! No!

Aah!

Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha!

Aah! No!

Calm down.
It'll be ok.
It'll be all right.

Hey, hey.
There you go.

There you go,
there you go.

Kel, what does that
story have to do
with the robbery?

Nothing. It's about orange soda.
You have to pay attention!

What happened
at rigby's this
afternoon?

Oh, kenan knocked
out the robber

With the door.

Well, kid,
good job.

You hear that,
jackhammer?

Looks like you're
going to be going
away for the next
years,

All thanks to
that kid right there.

Well, I wouldn't
say, "all thanks."

That's right!

Ha-ha. Yeah.
Years.

All thanks
to my buddy.

You goin' down, brother.

You goin'--
shh!
That does it!

When I get out
of here, I'm coming
after you,kevin!

Man! "Kevin!" What
kind of stuff is that?

You can't come back
for him. You don't
even know his name!

If you're gonna
say somebody's name,
get it right.

It's kenan.
Ooh!

Kenan rockmore.

Remember that.
Kenan rockmore
put you in jail.

Oh, you're mine,
kenan rockmore.

Mine!
Rrrr-ha-ha-ha-ha!

Yours?
Aw, I got to go!

Don't let him
scare you, kid.

You did a good
thing today.

You're a hero.

A hero?
Really? Wow!

Hey, kel, did
you hear that?
That's--oh!

Help me!

Oh, come on, man.

Get him off!

Reporters:
kenan, kenan!

Uh, kenan.

How does it feel
to be a hero?

Well, I don't
know about "hero."

I mean, all
I really did was catch
a dangerous criminal.

There was nothing
to it, really.

It was really
no big deal.

To those of you it's
still a big deal to you,

You can purchase
one of these
commemorative t-shirts.

Or, you can
buy one of these.

Kel, nobody's gonna
buy a shirt that says,
"friend of hero."

False information!
I already bought .

Well, I stand corrected.

Kenan, are you worried
about the jackhammer's
threats of carrying out
a painful revenge?

Well, "worried"?
Well, uh...

No. I mean, worried
isn't something that
I do, you know,

Being a hero and all.

Mr. Potter, are you
at all concerned about
the jackhammer returning

And ripping off
every one of your limbs?

Ah. Fast forward
past chris here.

Ah, here we go.

Do you consider
yourself to be
a brave person?

[Mouthing words on tape]
well, "brave" is
such a strong word,

But...yes!

Ha-ha-ha!

That's what you
said last time
we watched this.

Are you watching
that tape again?

Kenan,
it's been
days!

Mama, hey.
It's not every week
that we're on tv.

Kel:
hey,
rockmores.
Yeah.

Where you going
with all
the luggages?

Away for the
weekend, kel.

Both: no!ooh, can I go?

Now kenan, you sure
you're going to be ok
while we're gone?

Yeah, daddy,
I'll be fine, man.
And if anything
should happen,

I'll just deal
with it in my
usual heroic way.

Now move along.

All right.
Bye, our
little hero!

Hey, lemme
help with
the luggage.

No, it's
all right, kel.

I wanna help.no, kel. It's ok.

Ohh.

I'll fix it.
I'm sorry.

All right, let me
get all that in here.

You might want
a pillow.

All right, you might
want to call grandma.

All right!

Oh, man!

Thanks, kel.

You're welcome.

I'm sorry.
Let's go. Someone
get the door, please.

Good-bye, boys!

All right,
all right. Be good.

All right.
See y'all later.

Ok, yeah, all right.
All right.

Finally!
The house to ourselves.

No parents, no sisters.
Man, we can do whatever
we want to do.

Boy, the sky
is the limit!

Whoo! So what
are we going to
do first?

Let's watch tv.

Tv anchorman:
and that pig will
never swim again.

Now, in other news,
the jackhammer,

Who was arrested earlier this
week, has escaped from prison.

I repeat: dangerous
criminal mastermind john "the
jackhammer" rogan has escaped.

Ahh!

Oh, man.
You see that?

John the jack-a-hammer?
He escaped!

Aw, that's bad news.

'Cause you remember
what he said?

He said he was gonna
get you if it was
the last thing he did!

Kenan. Kenan!

Oop!

Hah!

Let's see the jackhammer
try to find me now!

Ain't nobody gonna
recognize me like this, baby.

Kenan, what's
with the getup?

It's supposed to
be a disguise, man,

So that the jackhammer
can't find me.

Oh, please.
That disguise isn't
going to fool anyone.

All right.
You guys seen kenan?

Kel, it's me.

And I'm me.

Y'all seen kenan?

Kel, this iskenan.

Well, if this
is the real kenan,

Then...how many
fingers I'm
holding up?

.

Hey, it is you!

A-a-all right, now.
Stop hugging me.
Leave me alone.

Everybody just
leave me alone!

Now, now, kenan. Calm down.

The jackhammer isn't
going to come after you
now that he's escaped.

I'm sure he's
left town by now.

Yeah! Unless he
plans to come
back, get his
revenge against you

And then leave town.

Oh, I gotta
get out of here.

Oh, I got to
get on out of here.

Got to to get on
out of here!

Kenan?
Aah!

We have some
news regarding
the jackhammer.

Oh?

Oh, is he
getting married?

You caught
him again?

Not exactly.
But we do have
an idea where
he may be headed.

Yeah, far away
from here, I bet.
You see, kenan?

We found this
"to do" list in
the jackhammer's cell.

Now as you could see
right at the top
of the list,

"Escape from prison"
has already been
crossed off.

And you'll notice
just below that
it says--

"Pick up dry
cleaning"?

No, below that.

Oh,"get kenan
rockmore."
Oh! He's gonna
get me!

Ooh! What he gonna
get you?

What should
I do?

Go home,
lock the door
and stay there.

We'll send someone
by from time to time
to check on you.

Ok, home. Got it.
Let me just
take off my wig
and my mustache.

Yeah, and I'm
gonna get some
orange soda.

But, uh-uh...oh, wait!

Uh, do you think
my life isn't in
any danger?

Oh. Come on,
man, let's go.

Ha-ha. Whoo!

Excuse me?

I thought you
were going to take
that old goofy
mustache off.

What?

I-is it stuck?

Oh, that's what's
wrong. Lemme see.
Come here, man.

Come on, man.
What's wrong
with you?

Come on, man.
Come here, lemme see.

[Rii-ii-iiip]come on...let go!

There.
There we go.

Aah.

Come on, kel, man.
You coming?

I--i'm sorry.
I--i--i'm sorry.

M-m-maybe i--

I--i--i'm sorry.
May--

I gotta go!
All right, kenan!

Aw. Gotta keep
the jackhammer out.

Oh! Uh, no jackhammer.

Oh. Whew!
All right. Yeah.

Let's see somebody try to
get through that door, baby.
Perfec--

Ahh, man!

I brought some home
videos for, you know,
to get your mind
off of things.

Oh, good.
What did you get?

Well, I got
revenge is sweet,

Sweet, sweet revenge,
and revenge equals pain.

Oh, I gotta get
out of here before
I get jackhammered.

[Knocking on door]

Ah! Knock at
the door. What if
it's jackhammer?

Don't worry.
I'll get him.

Wait, wait...if you--

Pizza farm!

Delivery for
a kel kim--

Yeah! Ha-ha-ha-
ha-ha-ha-ha!

Yeah, we showed him.

That's not
the jackhammer, man.
That's the pizza boy.

Oh. Oh, yeah.
That must be that
pizza I ordered earlier.

Man, I wanted
pepperoni!

Kel, the pizza
boy's unconscious.

I know,
but I wanted pepperoni.

Man, forget
about the pepperoni!

Help me move
the couch
against the door.

Ready, go!

Man, this
couch is heavy!

Man, stop!

I got
a better idea.

How about I
move the couch
against the door

And you take
the pizza boy in
the kitchen

And put some
ice on him
or something.

All right.

Come on, pizza boy.

Here we go.

Hoop, hoop!

Hah. Whew!

Heh-heh-ha-ha!

Yeah, let's see
the jackhammer try
to get through that one.

Hoo!

Ha-ha! Jackhammer!

Oh!

Kel! Quick!
He's here.

Give me something
to hit him with.

There you go.

Preferably
something not soft!

Oh!

Oh. How about these?

Great!

All right,
we're gonna cut
the lights out,

Then when he comes in,
we'll hit him with
the frying pan.

Hit him with
the frying pan.

What--what is
the couch doing here?

What is going on?

Dad! Dad, are you ok?

What--what are
you doing home?

Kenan, we came home
as soon as we heard
the jackhammer
escaped and we--

What did you
hit my mama for?

How was I supposed
to know that was
your mama?

Because the light's
on and you know
my mama!

My bad.

Ah-ah. The front
door's open.

I gotta close
the front door.

[Sound of frying pan
hitting]

What the--

Kel!

I'm--i'm sorry.
It's not my fault.
He surprised me.

Well, how could
he do that?

He--he came in
and said, "police.
We're coming in."

Well, I can see
how that could have
caught you off guard.

Kel! What did you
do that for?

He was waking up!

Ow! Well, all
the doors are
all open.

Look, stay in here.
Try not to knock out
or re-knock anybody
else out.

Fine. I won't
knock anyone out.

Oh! Ah! Jackhammer!

Ah-oh, stupid door.

Ok, hero.

I told you I
was gonna get you.

Oh, ah, m-m-m-mr.
Jackhammer...

Um, um, sir...

Well, about
the getting,
it was, um...

Hey, would you like
a cold beverage or
some pizza?

Is it
pepperoni?

No...ow!

Kenan, I don't
think jackhammer's
coming.

Kel! Knock
him out!

Well, wait a minute.

You--you told me
not to knock anyone
else out.

Yeah, but I'm now
telling you...
Knock him out!

You're sure
you're not gonna
get mad at me?

Just do it!

You're not
gonna get mad?

Just do it!

Ok.

Kel...

The next time
a big, scary man
is choking me,

And you're holding
a frying pan,

I would really
appreciate it if you---