01x12 - Misadventures in Hatchling-sitting

[bunniefuu]

[Mighty Eagle whistling]

[Mighty Eagle]
♪ Camp Splinterwood ♪

♪ Our summer home ♪

[driving rock music]

♪ For catapultin'!
Slingshottin'! Getting thrown! ♪

♪ Campers rocket through the trees ♪

♪ Cannonballing where they please ♪

♪ Zippin' in the air ♪

♪ Crashin' everywhere! ♪

♪ Archery, Dodgebird
Borb tennis-- it's absurd! ♪

♪ Here they come!
Red, Stella, b*mb, Chuck! ♪

♪ Flyin' Fast!
Look out, duck! ♪

♪ All your life, you'll be glad
You had this ♪

♪ Angry Birds Summer Madness! ♪

[bugle blowing reveille]

Hyuh!

Hmm? [inhales]

-[bugle blows]
-Uhh!

[humming reveille]

-Hi, b*mb.
-[shrieks]

Oh. Hi, uh, Matilda.

Uh… Happy Founders' Day, heh.

[sobbing]

Oh, no. I'm sorry. What did I say?

[inhales shakily]

It's just Lynette and Harold asked me
to direct the Founders' Day play today,

but I can't do that
and watch the hatchlings.

I guess the universe had other plans.

My lifelong dream will just have to wait.
[whimpering]

Your dream? Well, me and my friends
could watch them for you.

[gasps] Oh, b*mb.

[squeals] You are a lifesaver.

Mm-hmm. [giggles]

-[fuse sizzling]
-[grunting]

Yah!

And… perfect.

[b*mb wailing]

[b*mb] Sorry!

[spray can hissing]

Uh, think you missed a spot.

Ugh. You owe me big time, Red.

I need supreme coverage if we're
gonna have our chill day at the beach.

Right. We're gonna chill so hard.

[both grunting]

There it is! My tree of destiny.

Uh, everything okay, Chuck?

It's perfect. In fact,
it's better than perfect.

It's burrito extreme-o!

Because I am the great Francis Finch.

You know, founder of Camp Splinterwood?

I'm playing him in the Founders' Day
ceremony today.

Yeah, but it's chill day.

[British accent] There will be
no chilling today, my friends,

for the stage… beckons!

[b*mb] Hey, everyone.

Oh, I just wanted to thank you,
thank you, thank you

for being such beautiful souls
and doing this for me.

Oh, you're welcome.

I'm sorry. Uh, what are we doing for you?

Uh… I kinda sort of promised
we'd watch the hatchlings

so Matilda can
direct the Founders' Day ceremony.

[hatchlings chattering]

Aw. [giggles]
Hey there, cuties.

You are the absolute best.

Anytime you want your chakras aligned,
just let me know.

Chuck, ready to rehearse?

[rolling Rs] The real question is,
is the stage ready for me?

-[Matilda] Okay, then.
-[hatchlings giggling]

Be good.

Okay, little ones, ready to hit the beach
and chill with us?

[hatchlings chattering]

Ohh, that doesn't look good.

[energetic music]

[clatter]

Cuckoo! Cuckoo!

Uh, what's up? Why are they going crazy?
They were fine a second ago.

Hey! Take that out of your mouth!

Guess they're only good for Matilda.

[sighs] This is gonna put a damper
on chill day.

But this is Matilda's lifelong dream,
and I made a promise.

I can't let her down.

Ah… because you love her.

Ohh!

Come on, Stella. Leave him alone.

-b*mb, we'll do it.
-[b*mb grunts]

But only because you're so in love.

-[kissing]
-Hey, I am not. I just--

Uh, where are the hatchlings?

[dramatic music]

Uh-oh.

[hatchlings chattering]

[all shout]

[energetic music]

[chuckles and slurps]

[rubber band stretching]

[hatchlings chattering]

Where'd they go?

-[all shouting]
-[hatchlings laughing]

Okay, okay, places people.

Oh, I've always wanted to say that.

So at the big finale,
make sure you're all in your places,

and I'll set off the fireworks with this.

Is it my destiny to be flung aside
and forgotten?

[hatchlings chattering]

[b*mb] They're heading towards Matilda!

[hatchlings]
Whee!

[b*mb] Whew. Wha-ha!

[Stella and b*mb groan]

Well, at least they're back in our bunk.

-[Red] Oh! Ow!
-[b*mb] Ohh! Oh!

I know this is important
to you, but-- ow!

We-- oh!-- need-- ow!--
our-- oh!-- chill day. Oh!

[b*mb whimpering]

-[hatchling giggles]
-Okay, fine.

[knock on door]

Just please, don't make me
be the one to tell-- Matilda!

-Heh. Oh. Uh…
-[muffled crashing]

What are you doing here?

We are taking a five,
as they say in "the biz,"

and I just wanted to see how it's going,

and to thank you again
for making my dreams come true.

-I am having the best day.
-[muffled clatter]

Oh! You're welcome.

[Matilda] So… is everything okay?

Yah! Y-Yeah, they're just nipping.
I mean, napping.

Oh, bless the stars!

Well, when they wake up,
you should bring them to the ceremony.

Uh, sure. We'll be there.

Okay. Bye.

I couldn't do it, guys.
I couldn't crush her dreams. I'm sorry!

[sobbing]

[sighs]

All right, b*mb, we'll do it,
but you've gotta pull it together.

Okay, if we're going to the ceremony,

we need to figure out
how to keep these monsters under control.

[motor revving]

[Red] Put that down!

No! Bad hatchling!

[Stella screaming]

[crickets chirping, indistinct whispering]

[accordion playing
Vivialdi's The Four Seasons]

[sheepish laugh]

[hatchlings grunting]

Okay, it totally worked.

Not exactly what we had in mind
for chill day,

but it'll do, I guess.

During the performance, there will be
no talking, yawning, gum chewing,

and absolutely no smiling!

-And enjoy the show.
-[mic feedback]

[orchestral fanfare plays]

Blah! I've just had a vision of a camp
where children will frolic with mosquitoes

and be fed cheap, un-nutritious food,

and at its center, an oddly specific,
U-shaped tree!

Is it my destiny
to be thrown aside and forgotten?

Um, guys?

[hatchlings giggling]

-[Red] Ohh.
-[b*mb] They're gonna wreck the ceremony.

Not if we grab 'em first. Split up!

[hatchling giggling]

I gotcha!

[Chuck] Ah, my intrepid team
of plucky adventurers,

I, Francis Finch--

Blagh!

But, Mummy, I don't like the meat pies.

Got one!

There it is. It's glorious.

A tree perfectly shaped

to slingshot campers
in fun summertime activities.

I dub thee the Founders' Tree

on this fine day.

[lever squeaks]

Uh… night.

Uh, day.

Night. Day. Night. Day.

Night, day! Night, day!

-[scoffs]
-Night, day! Night, day!

-Night, day! Night, day! Night, day!
-[whimpers]

Night, day! Night, day! Night, day!

-That's two!
-[hatchling giggling]

I got this one.

[hatchling laughing]

Ohh! Aagh…

Away, foul, uh… fungi!

Be gone, I say!

[grunting]

[gasps]

[Chuck grunting]

What are you doing here?

I am the red… wood tree.

I'm, uh, trying to find
the magical mushroom…

and there he is.

[energetic music]

[hatchling giggling]

[Matilda gasps]

We got 'em!

No, that's only three. There's one left!

-There!
-I'll get him!

[giggling]

-Uhh!
-[blows raspberries]

[hatchling chattering]

Ha! Gotcha!

-[laughing]
-[growling]

Uh…

[gasps]

[growling]

-Uhh!
-[beeping]

[dramatic music]

Oh, no.

[boom]

[debris falling]

Uh… the end?

[grunting]

What are you doing on the stage?
You're gonna ruin the play.

b*mb, what happened?

We couldn't control the hatchlings.

Red and Stella told me to tell you,
but I didn't!

[sobbing] And then I blew everything up!

Matilda!

In all my years, I have never
seen anything so… so…

-Amazing! [laughs]
-[cheers and applause]

It's usually such a drag,
and everyone's asleep by the end.

But the mushroom, the pyrotechnics,
the explosions.

[laughs] Genius!

So, same time next year, Ms. Director, ah?

[laughing]

b*mb, next time
just tell me the truth, okay?

-Mm-hmm.
-[hatchlings giggling]

I don't know why you had
any trouble with them, though.

They are such darlings.

[audience cheering]

Thank you! Thank you!

You love me. You really love me!

[theme music playing]