01x22 - Are You Smarter Than A Smart Cabin?/Deep Sea Despot

[bunniefuu]

- ♪ SpongeBob ♪

- ♪ I'm off to summer camp ♪

- ♪ SpongeBob ♪

- ♪ Through nature I will tramp ♪

- ♪ SpongeBob will have you screaming ♪

- ♪ While milk is streaming right out of your nose ♪

Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa, whoa-whoa-whoa!

Ahh! Ahh!

♪ ♪

- ♪ SpongeBob ♪

- ♪ When nature's calling ♪

♪ You'll see me hauling ♪

♪ I'm hitting the trail ♪

[jolly music]

♪ ♪

- [sniffs]

Huh?

Ew!

Yech!

[trash clattering]

[grunting]

How do you live like this?

- [yawns]

How do you mean?

- Like this? Wah!

Whoa!

[crashing]

[grumbles]

- Hey!

I just organized that pile.

- [grumbles]

That does it!

Clean up this cabin immediately or else!

[door slams]

[trash clattering]

- Ah, he's just trash-talkin'.

- Yeah, but as Dinghies, we should have cabin pride.

Let's get cleaning!

- Yeah!

[grunts]

This stinks.

- Yeah, let's try something else.

- [humming]

Hmm?

What in tarnation?

[dramatic music]

[both grunting]

- [shouts]

- You're crazy as a bullbat if you think you

can shove garbage up my tube!

[grunts]

[both grunt]

- Sorry, Sandy.

We're really good at making messes but bad at cleaning up.

- You know, fellers, I've been tinkering

with a notion that'd be perfect for this here situation.

Now close your eyes.

[both giggle]

[sawing, drilling, hammering]

OK, you can open your eyes!

both: Ooh!

- [gasps]

Wow!

You--

[record scratches]

--didn't do anything.

- Or did I?

SAL, will you show the boys here how to clean up a room?

- It would be my genuine pleasure.

[whimsical music]

♪ ♪

[vacuum whirring]

♪ ♪

[both gasp]

- Ha.

♪ ♪

- Uh--

- Ah!

- You missed a spot.

[popping]

[bell dings]

- Now, that's what I call clean.

Hey, Sandy, how did a cabin do all that?

- Boys, meet the Sentient Automated Lodge.

I call him "SAL."

- Oh!

- Pleased to make your acquaintance.

- Hi, SAL.

How's it "glowin'"?

[laughs]

Get it?

- His mainframe, or brain, is situated

cozy as a cub up in my dome.

- My job is to optimize your cabin living experience,

from controlling the climate to scheduling

your camp time activities.

For instance, my sensors indicate that you are hungry.

So I took the liberty of making you

lots and lots of pizza.

[bell dings]

both: Yay!

- I love you.

- Hey!

I thought I told you to clean this--

Um, nice job.

- Nom-nom-nom.

Pizza, Squidward?

- Really?

OK!

[yells]

[groans]

Oh, now I'm a mess.

- Allow me to assist you.

- [groaning]

Hmm?

[grumbling]

[groans]

- Are you OK, Squidward?

- [groans]

I feel--

Wonderful!

- Happy to assist you.

Let us dance to celebrate my awesomeness.

[dance music]

- Whoa!

- Get down with your bad selves, uh-huh.

♪ ♪

[mechanical whirring]

I thought it would be nice to sleep under the stars tonight.

Good night.

- Good night, SAL!

Ah!

- SAL is awesome.

- Yep, there's no slack in his rope.

- And the best part is, we have him all to ourselves.

- [gasps]

Squidward, you're right.

We should throw a big party so the whole camp can enjoy SAL.

- What?

No, I meant the opposite!

Oh, it's like I'm talking to a wall.

[excited chatter]

- This place is awesome. - Greetings, y'all!

- Ooh!

- We invited you here to introduce

the Sentient Automated Lodge, who we call "SAL."

- Greetings, campers.

It has come to my attention that you like to "par-tay."

[dance music]

[together] Wow!

Whoa!

[cheering]

- Larry is dancing.

[chuckles]

Check it.

[both grunting]

- Meep, meep, meep.

Meep-meep, meep-meep-meep!

Phew! Meep.

- [laughing]

- [babbling]

Ooh.

These guys seem overheated, SAL.

Could you adjust their climate?

- It would be my pleasure.

[all panting]

Coolant applied.

[all sigh]

- [shivering]

- Actually, SAL, that one guy on the end

could use a little warm-up.

- Not a problem.

[light sizzling]

- Meep.

[laughter]

- Hmm?

Oh.

A true butler always anticipates the next mess.

- [laughing]

- Pizza Frisbee!

Yeah!

- Hmm?

What the?

Hmm?

Food fight!

[grunts] - [grunts]

Huh? Oh?

Food fight!

[laughter]

- Food fight!

- Wait! Stop!

You're making a mess!

- Whoa!

- Huh? Phew!

Oh!

- [laughing]

- Stop! Messy!

[chips f*ring]

No!

None of this is helping!

[laughter]

Mess too overwhelming!

My attempts to keep the cabin orderly have failed.

Only one solution.

[alarm blaring]

[laughter]

[alarm blares]

all: Huh?

[screaming]

- [laughing]

[gasps]

[screaming]

- SAL!

What in tarnation are you doing?

These are our friends!

- It is clear that you and your friends are the problem.

- Whoa!

[triumphant music]

[sighs]

All better.

[sparkles chiming]

[all grunting, groaning]

- This bag does nothing for my figure.

[mischievous music]

♪ ♪

[both groan]

[clarinet squeaking]

- Hey, that's my clarinet!

- Hey, I didn't know your clarinet played music.

- Huh?

Ahh!

- Hazard detected.

[both screaming]

Activating lockdown mode.

[alarms blaring]

- Oh, what are we gonna do now?

- Hmm.

Ooh, I got an inkling of a notion.

[indistinct chatter]

[together] Shush, shush, shh-shh.

- All right, here's the plan.

We need a slingshot Squidward through the window.

- Wait, what?

Why me?

- Well, 'cause the porthole is small, and you're the most

"porthole-iest." - Wait.

Ahh!

[grunts]

[grumbles]

- That's not how you hit a wall!

[shouts]

[thump]

- Well, now that you are stuck,

you can join my rhythm section.

- Oh, no!

Free-form jazz!

[yelling]

[both grunting]

- Hey, that's not half bad.

[all grunting]

- That ought to keep SAL distracted.

[grunting]

[suspenseful music]

[splashing]

[grunting]

[panting]

- [gasps]

- Sandy?

What are you doing, Sandy?

Sandy, stop.

I'm beginning to feel loopy.

- Why don't you sing a pretty little song

to make yourself feel better?

- ♪ I'm a Goofy Goober, yeah ♪

♪ You're a Goofy Goober, yeah ♪

♪ Goofy, Goofy, Goober ♪

[warbles]

- Sorry, SAL.

[all grunting]

- Oh.

Ooh.

Hey, my butt's not a drum anymore, guys!

Oh.

- You did it, Sandy!

- Ah!

- Yay, Sandy!

[both groan]

- [sighs]

Yeah, but I feel horrible about it.

All SAL wanted to do was help.

- I wish we could help him by helping him help.

- [gasps]

Ooh, we can!

I just got a humdinger of an idea!

[light music]

- Another pinch of paprika.

- Enough with the paprika already!

- My sensors indicate that this stew needs a little kick.

Ooh, a jalapeño.

Perfect.

- I'm not a jalapeño.

I'm your boss!

[grunts]

Hey, unhand me at once!

Whoa!

[stew bubbling]

[lips smacking]

Hmm, it does need more paprika.

- Ah, summer camp.

Another day, another terrible meal.

- [crying]

- [screaming] - [gasps]

Sacrebleu!

- [gasps]

Quiet, y'all.

You hearing this?

[noisy munching]

- That's the sound of people eating and liking it!

It's coming from over there.

- [grunts]

- [pants]

- [mutters]

- Huh?

[noisy munching]

- Plankton, you've outdone yourself.

- [grunts]

Why, thank you, oh, signer of my checks.

Ahh!

- A toast to Chef Plankton, who gave us all--

[all groaning]

--food poisoning.

[all retching]

- [grunts]

How dare you?

There's nothing wrong with my food.

[noisy munching]

[gulps]

See?

[groaning]

[light music]

[all moaning]

- We're all too sick.

So one of you junior counselors will have to take the helm.

[groaning]

Huh?

Oh, my.

Oh!

Oh, you better get that checked.

Ooh, you got a condition there, I think.

You, handsome!

[groans]

You're in charge.

- Me?

[all muttering]

I'm glad Mr. Krabs sees the importance of leaving

someone responsible in charge.

Now take good care of them, Pearl.

Bye-bye.

- [coos]

- Attention, campers.

The adults are all sick.

But in their infinite wisdom, they put me in charge.

So have no fear.

I will run a tight ship.

- Oh, please.

Krabs was delusional, or he wouldn't have picked a nerd

like you to be in charge.

- Bro, only a loser wouldn't take this

opportunity to full-on party!

[all cheering]

[all screaming]

- Krabs put you in charge.

Do something.

[all screaming]

- So you guys messed up and now you want me to fix everything?

- Yes, anything you say.

Just lead us, bro.

- All right, I'll fix your mess.

I've come here to kick butt and play clarinet,

and I left my clarinet in my cabin.

- [growling]

- Ahh! - Hey!

- Huh?

- No sacrifices to the Kraken!

- [groans]

- Hey, guys, come back!

[all cheering]

- No catapulting canoes.

- Ohh. - Oh, shucks.

- Aw.

- [laughing]

- No anchovies on pizza!

- Meep!

Meep, meep, meep--

- [groans]

[noisy munching]

- [slurping]

- Put out that fire!

- [slurping]

- Hmph.

- Straighten the stack!

- [grunting]

- [screams]

- Shore up the tower!

- We'll save you!

- Whoa! - [grunts]

- Phew!

- Paint the cabins!

[both chuckling]

- This is fun!

[drill whirring]

- [grunting]

- [mumbling]

all: Ahh.

- I can't believe it!

Counselor Squidward really pulled it off!

- We believe in you, Mr. Tentacles!

- Thank you. Thank you.

Yes, it's true.

I did something amazing here today.

And tomorrow I shall make this camp the greatest camp ever!

[together] Hooray! Yay!

[all cheering]

[militaristic music]

♪ ♪

- [slurps]

Ah.

What a glorious day in Camp Squidward, the perfect camp.

- Huh?

- A rose by any other name.

Ha, ah-ha, ah-ha!

- [blows raspberry]

[toilet flushes]

- Ah, my own personal outhouse that I don't have to share.

[chuckles]

[all groaning]

[drill whirring]

Ah, the statue.

It may be of me, but it's really for the people.

Huh?

Hey, loafer!

Report for statue construction!

- Not fun!

[dramatic music]

- [grunts]

- Excuse me, Mr. Tentacles.

- That's Camp Master Tentacles to you.

- Uh, Camp Master Tentacles, why are we throwing out

all of Mr. Krabs's stuff?

- How else will I be able to move

my far superior furniture in?

- [groans]

Squidward's head is getting more

swole than an unmilked udder.

I never thought I'd miss an adult in charge.

- Wah! Wah!

Wah!

[gulp]

[militaristic music]

[horn blows]

[all panting]

- Oh, I really worked up an appetite

with all that hard labor.

- Welcome, "Squampers."

I've made my specialty--

baked broccoli loaf a la Squidward.

Now eat it!

- Huh?

- Enjoy.

[dramatic music]

- [groaning]

I don't understand.

I can fit it in my mouth, but I don't want to eat it!

What madness is this?

- Excuse me, Mr. Tentacles!

Can we maybe get some apples or at least some milk?

- Only loyal "Squampers" get apples and milk.

In fact, let me introduce you to them, my new Squid Guard!

[whistle tweets]

[all barking]

both: Ahh!

- Now, back to work!

[together] Ahh!

[panting]

- The cheese has slipped off his cr*cker.

Pass it on.

[mischievous music]

[all growling]

- Huh?

[panting]

D'yoo!

The cheese has slipped off his cr*cker.

Whoop.

[grunts]

- Campers of the revolution, it's time

to take our camp back.

- Revolution?

I thought we were here for cheese and crackers.

- All the campers are fed up with Squidward's

ironfisted rule!

- Don't worry.

I have a plan that'll free us all, but I'm gonna

need y'all's help.

[jolly music]

- Aha!

There's a loyal "Squamper" raising my glorious flag.

- [panting]

- Patrick, of all my "Squampers,"

I didn't think you would remember my flag.

Raise it high so everyone can see their illustrious leader.

- [grunting]

Kamp Koral rules!

Camp Squidward drools!

- What?

I'll show you who drools!

[whistle tweets]

[all barking]

- Ahh!

[panting]

[all growling]

- Who wants it?

Who wants the ball?

[all panting]

[grunts]

Fetch!

[all barking]

- Hmm.

Now, where did they go?

Huh?

My flower bed?

My powder room!

My statue!

[growls]

How dare they?

My camp!

Someone's going to pay!

[clarinet music]

Huh?

♪ ♪

My clarinet!

You monsters!

[grunting]

Yeah!

Gotcha! [clarinet music]

What?

♪ ♪

[grunts]

♪ ♪

Huh?

[grunts]

Huh?

[growls] [grunts]

♪ ♪

Huh?

[panting]

[groaning]

[growling]

Give me my clarinet!

[clarinet tooting] Huh?

[panting]

My baby!

[ground crackling]

Uh-oh.

Ahh!

[groans]

- We finally caught us a tyrant.

[laughter]

- Uh--

[chuckles]

Maybe I went a little too far?

- Not as far as you're gonna go!

[laughter]

- A for effort, Mr. Tentacles.

- But fail on the follow-through.

Camp Squidward ends in , --

- Wait!

What in blazes is going on here?

Plankton, get up there and untie Counselor Squidward.

- Whoa!

[grunting]

There you go.

- [grunts]

Oh, thank you!

Thank you!

[crying]

- There, there.

This happens every time I put a camper in charge.

Whew, let us never forget the horrors of Camp Bubble Bass.

- [squawking]

All right, enough of this nonsense!

Kamp Koral is back in business!

[sign clangs]

[all cheering]

Oh, Plankton.

- What?

- This is for the food poisoning.

[grunts]

- Wait.

Ahh!

[sizzles]

[all cheering]