04x10 - Coffee Cart Ban
Posted: 03/28/24 20:16
WOMAN: Are you ready?
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ I know you see me
standing here ♪
♪ Do I look good,
my dear? ♪
♪ Do I look good today? ♪
♪ Today, today ♪
♪ Ooh ooh ooh ♪
♪ I'm just another
kind of girl ♪
♪ And you want
to see my world ♪
♪ So come and run away ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
♪ If you wanna play ♪
♪ Come and play today ♪
♪ Let's just get away, yeah ♪
♪ I will make you see ♪
♪ All of the things ♪
♪ That you can be ♪
♪ Believe in yourself ♪
♪ Come follow me ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
[horn honks]
JAMES: All right, wait.
So you're saying
you can knock people out
just by squeezing
their inner elbow?
- Yeah, it's easy.
- Easy for you.
- It is.
Look.
You put your thumb right here
and these fingers
on the back of your elbow,
and then you just
apply transverse pressure.
- Like this?
- No, um,
oh, here, watch.
- Oh, so you just push down
with the thumb.
- No, um, it's more like you
push in and then across.
Um, like this.
- Hey, that's Tiffany
from my French class.
- Oh, yeah, hmm.
Cool earrings.
- Oh, hey, Dean Rivers.
JAMES: Dean Rivers.
- Kids.
This is my wife, Tipper.
- Hi, I'm Quinn.
- Mrs. Rivers.
- Nice to meet you.
- She just loves
her new iBerry.
TIPPER: Oh, my God.
You know that scarf
I saw at Dorfberg's?
The one they said
didn't come in green?
Look!
It does come in green.
I am going to get
that saleslady
if it is
the last thing I do.
[students chattering]
- What's this about?
- Ethan, hey, hey.
What's going on?
- The coffee carts,
they're having half-price day.
- Half price
on coffee drinks?
- Coffee,
smoothies, muffins.
Half price on everything.
I gotta go!
- Wow, half-price coffee.
- Well, if you ask me,
I say kids today
are way too obsessed with--
- Let's go!
[students whooping]
[all shouting]
- Hey, hey, calm down!
Will you people chill out?
- We are working
as fast as we can!
- Petite mochaccino!
- Hey, I was here
way before you.
- One grandiose latte!
- Where's her grandiose latte?
- I'm doing my best.
Stop screaming at me!
- Here, take it.
- Yay.
Bleh!
- Oh, wait, I need a straw.
Hey, I need a straw.
GIRL: Come on!
[students continue shouting]
- Yay.
- Aah!
- Mmm, yum.
- Wait, no, no, no!
[girls screaming]
- No!
[screaming]
- Hey, lady, look out!
- Can't you see I'm texting?
[screaming]
[thud]
GIRL: Oh, my God,
is that the new iBerry?
- Two, three, lift.
[grunting]
DEAN: Tipper, Tipper!
Can you hear me?
- Yes, I can hear you.
Help me up!
- How did this happen?
- It was chaos.
There were like a hundred kids
freaking out over
the half-price sale.
- Bullhorn!
Attention!
Attention all PCA students!
From this day forward,
I hereby ban all coffee carts
from this campus.
BOY: You can't do that.
- What?
- No, no.
- You can't ban
the coffee carts.
- I just bought a new mug.
- Then fill it with chowder.
- Chowder?
- Anybody caught on this campus
with coffee
will be in big trouble.
That applies to students,
teachers, everyone.
[students groaning]
Can I get you anything?
- Yes, a new life!
Move!
- Chowder?
- Dang it.
- Who says "dang it"?
- People who grew up
in the South.
- Who cares?
I want coffee.
- Yeah, I wouldn't mind
a decaf icy blend.
QUINN: Watch this.
[high-pitched whirring]
QUINN: Ha.
I win again.
- Well, yeah.
- Girls.
Special girl.
Hey, why do your lips
taste like--
- Uh, let's talk
over there.
We'll be right back.
Keep it down,
would you?
- You taste like coffee.
- I understand.
- How?
- 'Cause I've been
drinking coffee.
- But there's no coffee
on campus.
- Isn't there?
- Where?
- [whispers]
- No way.
- You can't tell people.
- Yeah, yeah.
Come here, come here,
come here.
[whispers]
- Really?
- No way!
[all giggling]
- Hurry!
MAN: ♪ Da da da
bap bap bah... ♪
- Excuse me.
- Password?
- What password?
- Just let us in.
- You big meathead.
- Names.
- Zoey, Lola, and Quinn.
- Wait here.
Go ahead.
[crowd chattering]
GIRL: Hey, can I get
a blueberry muffin?
[chattering continues]
- Girls,
thanks for stopping by.
- When did you guys--
- Hey, Logan,
we got a situation here.
- Be right back.
What's the problem?
- He wants sugar for free.
- For free?
CALVIN: Yeah.
You're charging me
nine bucks for a large coffee,
and now I'm supposed to pay
another buck for sugar?
LOGAN: You don't like it,
go buy your coffee
somewhere else.
- There is no place else
at PCA.
- You want the sugar?
MICHAEL: Thank you.
- Wait,
you wanna buy a muffin?
CALVIN: No!
- Sorry.
So what can I get you?
- $9 for a cup of coffee?
- Kind of pricey.
- You can get a medium
for $8.50.
- But the PCA coffee carts
didn't charge nearly that much.
- Oh, well.
- Um...
- You're not gonna charge me,
are you, baby?
- Yes, I am.
- We're boyfriend
and girlfriend.
- I know, but business
is business, hmm?
- Where's James?
- Don't know.
You want coffee or not?
- We're not gonna pay
your freakish prices.
- Then no coffee for you.
- Wait, how are you
selling coffee?
Where are you
getting it from?
- I have a connection.
- I'll get us some.
Hi, Michael.
- Hey, Lola.
- One large coffee.
- Can do.
That'll be $9.
LOLA: No problem,
I got a $10 bill right in my--
Zoey, Quinn, let's go!
- Right behind you.
[gasps]
- JT, you know what to do.
- Ow!
- Manhandler!
- This is so unfair.
Any kid who wants
coffee at PCA
has to deal with stupid Logan.
- So what are we gonna
do about this?
- I don't know,
get a part-time job
so we can afford
Logan's prices?
- Yeah, I don't do jobs.
- Hey, my uncle
just married a lady
who runs a coffee shop
in Seattle.
- You think
she'd send us coffee?
[upbeat pop music]
GIRL: Hot chocolate, please.
[students chattering]
- How much for a large?
- $4.
- Really?
You know, Logan's charging
nine bucks for a large.
- Is he?
Well, we're not.
Your coffee.
- Your $4.
Thanks.
- Thank you.
- Hey, there's like eight more
kids outside
who wanna come in.
- Uh...
okay, let them in.
- Cool.
Hey, guys.
GIRL: Hey, Zoey.
BOY: Hey, Zoey.
- Hey, you got room for one
more thirsty PCA stude--
LOGAN: I don't get it.
What happened?
- People stopped coming
here to buy coffee.
- I know that.
I wanna know why.
- I'll tell you why.
Zoey Brooks is selling
coffee in her dorm
for less than half of
what we're selling it for.
- Zoey?
James,
did you know about this?
- Sure.
- So why didn't you tell me?
- 'Cause it's fun
when you're mad.
- I told you we were
charging too much.
- Yeah, well, everybody
was happy to pay us
till Zoey
stole our customers.
Where'd you buy that?
- From Zoey.
Hey, they had cinnamon.
- Look, let's just
lower our prices
and then we'll get
all our customers back.
- I got a better idea.
I'm gonna eliminate
the competition.
Yeah, Dean Rivers,
please.
- What are you gonna say?
- Yes, Dean Rivers?
I think I have
a little information
you'd like to know.
It's about coffee
on campus.
MAN: ♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah... ♪
MAN: ♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah,
ah, ah, ah, ah... ♪
♪ ♪
MICHAEL: James, James!
Hey, James,
stop the game.
Hey, James,
hey, James!
[panting]
- My roommate.
- I gotta talk to you.
Excuse me.
- What's up?
- Logan dropped dime on Zoey.
- Dropped dime?
- It's a cool street term.
It means he turned her in.
- All right,
just catch your breath
and tell me what
happened.
- Logan called Dean Rivers
and told him
that Zoey's selling coffee
and muffins and such
in her dorm room.
- Take my place
in the game.
- But these aren't
my hoop shoes.
I can't play basketball--
- Michael!
[students chattering]
[cell phone rings]
- Hey, how's your game going?
- Dean Rivers is
on his way to your dorm.
- What?
- You better shut down fast.
I'm on my way.
- Thanks.
Okay, everybody listen.
We're about to get busted.
- Well, don't just
stand around.
- Hide everything!
♪ ♪
MAN: ♪ No, no, no
ooh, ooh ♪
♪ No, no, no,
ooh, ooh ♪
♪ Keep it alive... ♪
[moaning]
- Okay.
Pillows over here.
♪ ♪
MAN: ♪ No, no, no
ooh, ooh ♪
♪ No, no, no... ♪
[students chattering]
♪ ♪
- Oof!
♪ ♪
MAN: ♪ No, no, no
ooh, ooh ♪
♪ No, no, no, ooh, ooh ♪
♪ No, no, no
ooh, ooh ♪
♪ No, no, no, oh, yeah! ♪
- "And he came upon
the clearing
and saw the glorious fields
beneath him and proclaimed..."
- "Gaze upon this place
"from whence
those before us frolicked
"and let us give thanks
for the bounty
that has been
bestowed upon his."
- Um, excuse me.
- Shh, this is
my favorite part.
- "And so the people
rejoiced
and feasted upon
the blessed fruits."
ALL: The blessed fruits.
- "Then raised
their voices in song,
praising their homeland."
- Sorry about that, Dean Rivers.
Whatcha need?
DEAN: Um...
I got a phone call
saying that...
Never mind.
- Hey, can I get
another large coffee?
GIRL: I need a medium decaf.
- Do you guys have any more
of those fat-free muffins?
[all talking at once]
- Hey, hey, you guys!
We gotta close down
for a few days.
[all groaning]
- How come?
- Logan told Dean Rivers on us,
so he's gonna be
all suspicious now.
- [sighs]
She's right.
- Yeah.
Get out!
- We'll open back up
in a few days,
after things cool down.
- But for now, leave.
[students chattering]
BOY:
Get your backpack.
- Bye.
- Thanks for warning us.
- Hey, what are
boyfriends for?
- Aw.
- This is no time for cuteness.
Now Logan's gonna get
all of our customers.
- No, he's not.
- But don't you think
everybody's gonna--
- He messed with our business,
so we're gonna mess with his.
- How?
- How, Quinn?
- Well, um,
I have been working
on extending the range
of my zap watch.
- What's a zap watch?
QUINN: Hmm, hmm, hmm.
[watch beeping]
Twist the thingy.
- Ow!
No more questions.
MAN: ♪ Bop, bop, bop, bop
yada, da, da... ♪
[students chattering]
- Nice to see you, Jeff.
Hey, Gordy,
how's that French roast?
Alison, nice sweater.
- [giggles]
- [whispers]
It's awful.
Hey, what did I tell you?
We're back in business,
my friend.
- Yeah,
but why'd you
have to raise prices?
- Because I can.
- Hey, Logan.
- Hey.
- Cappuccino.
♪ ♪
- Okay, guys.
- Is James there yet?
- Oh, let me check.
QUINN: Yep.
James just walked in.
[students chattering]
♪ ♪
Okay, he touched
his forehead.
We're good to go.
[students chattering]
- That thing scares me.
- It won't, like, hurt
anybody, will it?
- Not too bad.
And...
QUINN: Zap.
- Ah!
- Oh, Oh.
- Did you get it?
- Yep, targeting
another one.
QUINN: Hold still.
- Hey, my cup's leaking.
- Yeah, mine is too.
- Hey, don't drip coffee
on the carpet.
- It's not my fault.
QUINN: And zap.
Yes.
- Hey!
QUINN: This is kind of fun.
- Keep zapping.
- Zap it up, Quinn.
- Hey, mine is leaking too.
Pass me some napkins.
- What's going on?
I need more napkins.
- Where are the napkins?
- Is there anymore napkins?
- I told you not to buy
those cheap cups.
You don't buy cups
spelled with a "K."
- They're quality cups.
- Look around.
- This is so great.
- Yeah.
Move!
- Hey!
- Ow!
LOLA: [laughs]
- Ow!
LOLA: [laughs]
[girls laughing]
QUINN: All right,
stop zapping Logan.
- Ow!
LOLA: [laughs]
- Ouch!
- What's going on in here?
- Dean Rivers.
GIRL:
It's the dean!
[students shouting]
- Ow!
- Whoops.
[chuckles]
- Logan, Michael,
in my office.
Now!
- They're so busted.
- Yes.
- So are you.
♪ ♪
DEAN: I am flabbergasted.
Flabbergasted!
You understand me?
What don't you
understand, Logan?
- What "flabbergasted" means.
- It means I am shocked
and outraged
that you kids
would defy PCA rules
and run two illegal coffee shops
right under my nose.
I banned the coffee carts
for a reason,
and I expect
my rules to be respected.
Well, what do you have
to say?
- Well, none of the kids
at PCA think it was fair
of you to ban the coffee carts
in the first place.
- Who asked you?
- You just did.
- Don't twist my words.
When I ban something from
this campus, it's banned.
For you, for me,
for everyone.
And what is this thing?
- I wouldn't touch that.
- I am the dean of this--
- Uh, what is that?
- Nothing.
Let's forget about
this whole thing.
Dismissed.
- My goodness.
- Just leave that alone.
- Dean Rivers,
that isn't coffee, is it?
- It looks like coffee.
- [sniffs]
Smells like coffee.
- I am gabberflasted.
I am shocked.
- I think Jeremiah Trotman
might be very interested to know
that the dean of PCA
violated his own coffee ban.
- What a great story
for the "PCA News."
- I don't think we need
to involve "PCA News."
Why don't we just pretend that
none of this ever happened?
- Sure.
Right after you make
a little announcement.
DEAN: Attention,
PCA students and faculty.
After rethinking the situation
and my somewhat
hasty decision,
I've decided...
the PCA
coffee cart ban is over.
[cheering]
- ♪ Ahh, ahh, ahh
ahh, ahh... ♪
♪ ♪
- One grandiose javaccino,
$3.50.
- One grandiose javaccino.
- Sure. $400.
- What?
I'm not paying you 400 bucks.
- If you don't like it, go buy
your coffee somewhere else.
- Come on, dude.
- $400, or no coffee.
- There is no way I'm...
Ugh.
One hundred.
Two hundred.
Three hundred.
Four hundred.
WOMAN: ♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
♪ I'm just another
kind of girl ♪
♪ And you want
to see my world ♪
♪ So come and run away ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
♪ If you wanna play ♪
♪ Come and play today ♪
♪ Let's just get away, yeah ♪
♪ I will make you see ♪
♪ All of the things ♪
♪ That you can be ♪
♪ Believe in yourself ♪
♪ Come follow me ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
[bell dings]
MAN: Mmm!
LOLA: That thing scares me.
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ I know you see me
standing here ♪
♪ Do I look good,
my dear? ♪
♪ Do I look good today? ♪
♪ Today, today ♪
♪ Ooh ooh ooh ♪
♪ I'm just another
kind of girl ♪
♪ And you want
to see my world ♪
♪ So come and run away ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
♪ If you wanna play ♪
♪ Come and play today ♪
♪ Let's just get away, yeah ♪
♪ I will make you see ♪
♪ All of the things ♪
♪ That you can be ♪
♪ Believe in yourself ♪
♪ Come follow me ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
[horn honks]
JAMES: All right, wait.
So you're saying
you can knock people out
just by squeezing
their inner elbow?
- Yeah, it's easy.
- Easy for you.
- It is.
Look.
You put your thumb right here
and these fingers
on the back of your elbow,
and then you just
apply transverse pressure.
- Like this?
- No, um,
oh, here, watch.
- Oh, so you just push down
with the thumb.
- No, um, it's more like you
push in and then across.
Um, like this.
- Hey, that's Tiffany
from my French class.
- Oh, yeah, hmm.
Cool earrings.
- Oh, hey, Dean Rivers.
JAMES: Dean Rivers.
- Kids.
This is my wife, Tipper.
- Hi, I'm Quinn.
- Mrs. Rivers.
- Nice to meet you.
- She just loves
her new iBerry.
TIPPER: Oh, my God.
You know that scarf
I saw at Dorfberg's?
The one they said
didn't come in green?
Look!
It does come in green.
I am going to get
that saleslady
if it is
the last thing I do.
[students chattering]
- What's this about?
- Ethan, hey, hey.
What's going on?
- The coffee carts,
they're having half-price day.
- Half price
on coffee drinks?
- Coffee,
smoothies, muffins.
Half price on everything.
I gotta go!
- Wow, half-price coffee.
- Well, if you ask me,
I say kids today
are way too obsessed with--
- Let's go!
[students whooping]
[all shouting]
- Hey, hey, calm down!
Will you people chill out?
- We are working
as fast as we can!
- Petite mochaccino!
- Hey, I was here
way before you.
- One grandiose latte!
- Where's her grandiose latte?
- I'm doing my best.
Stop screaming at me!
- Here, take it.
- Yay.
Bleh!
- Oh, wait, I need a straw.
Hey, I need a straw.
GIRL: Come on!
[students continue shouting]
- Yay.
- Aah!
- Mmm, yum.
- Wait, no, no, no!
[girls screaming]
- No!
[screaming]
- Hey, lady, look out!
- Can't you see I'm texting?
[screaming]
[thud]
GIRL: Oh, my God,
is that the new iBerry?
- Two, three, lift.
[grunting]
DEAN: Tipper, Tipper!
Can you hear me?
- Yes, I can hear you.
Help me up!
- How did this happen?
- It was chaos.
There were like a hundred kids
freaking out over
the half-price sale.
- Bullhorn!
Attention!
Attention all PCA students!
From this day forward,
I hereby ban all coffee carts
from this campus.
BOY: You can't do that.
- What?
- No, no.
- You can't ban
the coffee carts.
- I just bought a new mug.
- Then fill it with chowder.
- Chowder?
- Anybody caught on this campus
with coffee
will be in big trouble.
That applies to students,
teachers, everyone.
[students groaning]
Can I get you anything?
- Yes, a new life!
Move!
- Chowder?
- Dang it.
- Who says "dang it"?
- People who grew up
in the South.
- Who cares?
I want coffee.
- Yeah, I wouldn't mind
a decaf icy blend.
QUINN: Watch this.
[high-pitched whirring]
QUINN: Ha.
I win again.
- Well, yeah.
- Girls.
Special girl.
Hey, why do your lips
taste like--
- Uh, let's talk
over there.
We'll be right back.
Keep it down,
would you?
- You taste like coffee.
- I understand.
- How?
- 'Cause I've been
drinking coffee.
- But there's no coffee
on campus.
- Isn't there?
- Where?
- [whispers]
- No way.
- You can't tell people.
- Yeah, yeah.
Come here, come here,
come here.
[whispers]
- Really?
- No way!
[all giggling]
- Hurry!
MAN: ♪ Da da da
bap bap bah... ♪
- Excuse me.
- Password?
- What password?
- Just let us in.
- You big meathead.
- Names.
- Zoey, Lola, and Quinn.
- Wait here.
Go ahead.
[crowd chattering]
GIRL: Hey, can I get
a blueberry muffin?
[chattering continues]
- Girls,
thanks for stopping by.
- When did you guys--
- Hey, Logan,
we got a situation here.
- Be right back.
What's the problem?
- He wants sugar for free.
- For free?
CALVIN: Yeah.
You're charging me
nine bucks for a large coffee,
and now I'm supposed to pay
another buck for sugar?
LOGAN: You don't like it,
go buy your coffee
somewhere else.
- There is no place else
at PCA.
- You want the sugar?
MICHAEL: Thank you.
- Wait,
you wanna buy a muffin?
CALVIN: No!
- Sorry.
So what can I get you?
- $9 for a cup of coffee?
- Kind of pricey.
- You can get a medium
for $8.50.
- But the PCA coffee carts
didn't charge nearly that much.
- Oh, well.
- Um...
- You're not gonna charge me,
are you, baby?
- Yes, I am.
- We're boyfriend
and girlfriend.
- I know, but business
is business, hmm?
- Where's James?
- Don't know.
You want coffee or not?
- We're not gonna pay
your freakish prices.
- Then no coffee for you.
- Wait, how are you
selling coffee?
Where are you
getting it from?
- I have a connection.
- I'll get us some.
Hi, Michael.
- Hey, Lola.
- One large coffee.
- Can do.
That'll be $9.
LOLA: No problem,
I got a $10 bill right in my--
Zoey, Quinn, let's go!
- Right behind you.
[gasps]
- JT, you know what to do.
- Ow!
- Manhandler!
- This is so unfair.
Any kid who wants
coffee at PCA
has to deal with stupid Logan.
- So what are we gonna
do about this?
- I don't know,
get a part-time job
so we can afford
Logan's prices?
- Yeah, I don't do jobs.
- Hey, my uncle
just married a lady
who runs a coffee shop
in Seattle.
- You think
she'd send us coffee?
[upbeat pop music]
GIRL: Hot chocolate, please.
[students chattering]
- How much for a large?
- $4.
- Really?
You know, Logan's charging
nine bucks for a large.
- Is he?
Well, we're not.
Your coffee.
- Your $4.
Thanks.
- Thank you.
- Hey, there's like eight more
kids outside
who wanna come in.
- Uh...
okay, let them in.
- Cool.
Hey, guys.
GIRL: Hey, Zoey.
BOY: Hey, Zoey.
- Hey, you got room for one
more thirsty PCA stude--
LOGAN: I don't get it.
What happened?
- People stopped coming
here to buy coffee.
- I know that.
I wanna know why.
- I'll tell you why.
Zoey Brooks is selling
coffee in her dorm
for less than half of
what we're selling it for.
- Zoey?
James,
did you know about this?
- Sure.
- So why didn't you tell me?
- 'Cause it's fun
when you're mad.
- I told you we were
charging too much.
- Yeah, well, everybody
was happy to pay us
till Zoey
stole our customers.
Where'd you buy that?
- From Zoey.
Hey, they had cinnamon.
- Look, let's just
lower our prices
and then we'll get
all our customers back.
- I got a better idea.
I'm gonna eliminate
the competition.
Yeah, Dean Rivers,
please.
- What are you gonna say?
- Yes, Dean Rivers?
I think I have
a little information
you'd like to know.
It's about coffee
on campus.
MAN: ♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah... ♪
MAN: ♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah,
ah, ah, ah, ah... ♪
♪ ♪
MICHAEL: James, James!
Hey, James,
stop the game.
Hey, James,
hey, James!
[panting]
- My roommate.
- I gotta talk to you.
Excuse me.
- What's up?
- Logan dropped dime on Zoey.
- Dropped dime?
- It's a cool street term.
It means he turned her in.
- All right,
just catch your breath
and tell me what
happened.
- Logan called Dean Rivers
and told him
that Zoey's selling coffee
and muffins and such
in her dorm room.
- Take my place
in the game.
- But these aren't
my hoop shoes.
I can't play basketball--
- Michael!
[students chattering]
[cell phone rings]
- Hey, how's your game going?
- Dean Rivers is
on his way to your dorm.
- What?
- You better shut down fast.
I'm on my way.
- Thanks.
Okay, everybody listen.
We're about to get busted.
- Well, don't just
stand around.
- Hide everything!
♪ ♪
MAN: ♪ No, no, no
ooh, ooh ♪
♪ No, no, no,
ooh, ooh ♪
♪ Keep it alive... ♪
[moaning]
- Okay.
Pillows over here.
♪ ♪
MAN: ♪ No, no, no
ooh, ooh ♪
♪ No, no, no... ♪
[students chattering]
♪ ♪
- Oof!
♪ ♪
MAN: ♪ No, no, no
ooh, ooh ♪
♪ No, no, no, ooh, ooh ♪
♪ No, no, no
ooh, ooh ♪
♪ No, no, no, oh, yeah! ♪
- "And he came upon
the clearing
and saw the glorious fields
beneath him and proclaimed..."
- "Gaze upon this place
"from whence
those before us frolicked
"and let us give thanks
for the bounty
that has been
bestowed upon his."
- Um, excuse me.
- Shh, this is
my favorite part.
- "And so the people
rejoiced
and feasted upon
the blessed fruits."
ALL: The blessed fruits.
- "Then raised
their voices in song,
praising their homeland."
- Sorry about that, Dean Rivers.
Whatcha need?
DEAN: Um...
I got a phone call
saying that...
Never mind.
- Hey, can I get
another large coffee?
GIRL: I need a medium decaf.
- Do you guys have any more
of those fat-free muffins?
[all talking at once]
- Hey, hey, you guys!
We gotta close down
for a few days.
[all groaning]
- How come?
- Logan told Dean Rivers on us,
so he's gonna be
all suspicious now.
- [sighs]
She's right.
- Yeah.
Get out!
- We'll open back up
in a few days,
after things cool down.
- But for now, leave.
[students chattering]
BOY:
Get your backpack.
- Bye.
- Thanks for warning us.
- Hey, what are
boyfriends for?
- Aw.
- This is no time for cuteness.
Now Logan's gonna get
all of our customers.
- No, he's not.
- But don't you think
everybody's gonna--
- He messed with our business,
so we're gonna mess with his.
- How?
- How, Quinn?
- Well, um,
I have been working
on extending the range
of my zap watch.
- What's a zap watch?
QUINN: Hmm, hmm, hmm.
[watch beeping]
Twist the thingy.
- Ow!
No more questions.
MAN: ♪ Bop, bop, bop, bop
yada, da, da... ♪
[students chattering]
- Nice to see you, Jeff.
Hey, Gordy,
how's that French roast?
Alison, nice sweater.
- [giggles]
- [whispers]
It's awful.
Hey, what did I tell you?
We're back in business,
my friend.
- Yeah,
but why'd you
have to raise prices?
- Because I can.
- Hey, Logan.
- Hey.
- Cappuccino.
♪ ♪
- Okay, guys.
- Is James there yet?
- Oh, let me check.
QUINN: Yep.
James just walked in.
[students chattering]
♪ ♪
Okay, he touched
his forehead.
We're good to go.
[students chattering]
- That thing scares me.
- It won't, like, hurt
anybody, will it?
- Not too bad.
And...
QUINN: Zap.
- Ah!
- Oh, Oh.
- Did you get it?
- Yep, targeting
another one.
QUINN: Hold still.
- Hey, my cup's leaking.
- Yeah, mine is too.
- Hey, don't drip coffee
on the carpet.
- It's not my fault.
QUINN: And zap.
Yes.
- Hey!
QUINN: This is kind of fun.
- Keep zapping.
- Zap it up, Quinn.
- Hey, mine is leaking too.
Pass me some napkins.
- What's going on?
I need more napkins.
- Where are the napkins?
- Is there anymore napkins?
- I told you not to buy
those cheap cups.
You don't buy cups
spelled with a "K."
- They're quality cups.
- Look around.
- This is so great.
- Yeah.
Move!
- Hey!
- Ow!
LOLA: [laughs]
- Ow!
LOLA: [laughs]
[girls laughing]
QUINN: All right,
stop zapping Logan.
- Ow!
LOLA: [laughs]
- Ouch!
- What's going on in here?
- Dean Rivers.
GIRL:
It's the dean!
[students shouting]
- Ow!
- Whoops.
[chuckles]
- Logan, Michael,
in my office.
Now!
- They're so busted.
- Yes.
- So are you.
♪ ♪
DEAN: I am flabbergasted.
Flabbergasted!
You understand me?
What don't you
understand, Logan?
- What "flabbergasted" means.
- It means I am shocked
and outraged
that you kids
would defy PCA rules
and run two illegal coffee shops
right under my nose.
I banned the coffee carts
for a reason,
and I expect
my rules to be respected.
Well, what do you have
to say?
- Well, none of the kids
at PCA think it was fair
of you to ban the coffee carts
in the first place.
- Who asked you?
- You just did.
- Don't twist my words.
When I ban something from
this campus, it's banned.
For you, for me,
for everyone.
And what is this thing?
- I wouldn't touch that.
- I am the dean of this--
- Uh, what is that?
- Nothing.
Let's forget about
this whole thing.
Dismissed.
- My goodness.
- Just leave that alone.
- Dean Rivers,
that isn't coffee, is it?
- It looks like coffee.
- [sniffs]
Smells like coffee.
- I am gabberflasted.
I am shocked.
- I think Jeremiah Trotman
might be very interested to know
that the dean of PCA
violated his own coffee ban.
- What a great story
for the "PCA News."
- I don't think we need
to involve "PCA News."
Why don't we just pretend that
none of this ever happened?
- Sure.
Right after you make
a little announcement.
DEAN: Attention,
PCA students and faculty.
After rethinking the situation
and my somewhat
hasty decision,
I've decided...
the PCA
coffee cart ban is over.
[cheering]
- ♪ Ahh, ahh, ahh
ahh, ahh... ♪
♪ ♪
- One grandiose javaccino,
$3.50.
- One grandiose javaccino.
- Sure. $400.
- What?
I'm not paying you 400 bucks.
- If you don't like it, go buy
your coffee somewhere else.
- Come on, dude.
- $400, or no coffee.
- There is no way I'm...
Ugh.
One hundred.
Two hundred.
Three hundred.
Four hundred.
WOMAN: ♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
♪ I'm just another
kind of girl ♪
♪ And you want
to see my world ♪
♪ So come and run away ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
♪ If you wanna play ♪
♪ Come and play today ♪
♪ Let's just get away, yeah ♪
♪ I will make you see ♪
♪ All of the things ♪
♪ That you can be ♪
♪ Believe in yourself ♪
♪ Come follow me ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
[bell dings]
MAN: Mmm!
LOLA: That thing scares me.