03x23 - Unauthorized Mission

[bunniefuu]

Nice work, guys.

That mission
was a total success.

Maybe for you.

Nothing caught on fire
or blew up.

To me: colossal failure.

Well, good news,
you've got heat vision

and a whole afternoon
ahead of you.

Go make something happen.

Hey, Adam, check it out.

While you were gone

I got to boogie board
with the dolphins.

Bob, those weren't dolphins.

These are clearly the bites
of an angry catfish.

Wow, is there anything
you don't know?

I don't think
we should let those two

play together anymore.

Uh-uh.

Hey, Chase, on the next mission

do you think I might actually
be able to do something?

You did get to do something.

You watched me
be an amazing mission leader.

Most people would pay
to see that.

And then demand a refund.

I'm just saying
the whole purpose for me

going on the mission was
to get some hands-on training.

And you did.

You handed me my flashlight
and my lip balm.

Thank you.

But I'm the best student here.

I've been acing
all of my training exercises.

Without practice how am I
ever gonna be mission leader?

Oh, that's just it, you won't.

'Cause I'm mission leader.

Yeah, dude, you can't be
mission leader, too,

because then I would have
to make fun of both of you,

and there just aren't
enough hours in the day.

I need some me time.

Hey, Chase, stop being
such a control freak, okay?

Sebastian seems
perfectly capable.

Oh, thanks.

My pleasure.
Oh.

Okay, our next mission
is stopping that.

BOB: Hey, look!

I'm riding an angry catfish!

Whoa, look at him go!

Yeah, that is not a catfish.

Bob!

ANNOUNCER: The world's
first bionic superhumans,

they're stronger than us,

faster, smarter,

the next generation
of the human race is...

Living in my basement?

Ah!

Hey!

I just heard
Leo got to go on a mission.

Why'd he get picked and not me?

Well, Spin,

Leo and Sebastian both excelled
in their training this week.

Plus, Mr. Davenport considered
many other factors,

like experience, bionic ability,
social dynamics...

Too short, too young.

Bye-bye.

Mr. Davenport,

do you think I'm too young
to go on missions?

Yes.
And too short.

I thought Leo just covered this.

But Leo always brags about
how you sent him on a mission

when he was young
to stop a runaway train.

Uh, yeah, technically
he wasn't "sent,"

he snuck on the train.

But I was there.

And I was awesome.

Look,
just focus on your training

and eventually
your time will come.

This isn't fair.

I'm never gonna get to go
on a mission.

See how I handled that, Leo?

These kids are so lucky
to have me.

Too old, too vain.
Bye-bye.

Look, I got to admit,
Mr. Davenport,

you did a really good job
designing this place.

This academy
is my greatest achievement.

Of all the things I've built

this is the thing
I'm most proud of.

Morning, Don.
Morning, girl.

The island is contaminated.

Get everyone to the life boats.
We can blow it up.

I wasn't that attached
to it anyways.

How did you get on
our hydraloop?

I dated your security guard
for 3 weeks to gain his trust.

When that didn't work,

I knocked him out
and stole his keys.

How much ocean
do we have to put between us

to get away from you?

Ain't enough water in the world.

My webbed toes
double as flippers.

When I spread them out,

they look like
baby pterodactyls.

Why are you here?

I retired.

The school just wasn't the same

without my favorite freaks
to torment.

I tried, but I couldn't hate
the new kids

as much as I hate you guys.

Anyhoo, a little birdie told me

your robot school
is looking for an administrator.

Yeah, we're not.

But tell you what,
leave your resume

and we'll call you
if we lose our minds.

Oh, how about a gardener?

No.
Short order cook?

No.
Unlicensed psychotherapist?

No!

Look, I'm bored and I want to
get back in the game.

Just tell me what you need.

I could be your barber.

Nobody likes a pretty girl
with long hair.

Okay.

The only thing
we need is a security guard

to keep people like you out.

Yes, I could be
your head of security.

I've been a warden, a guard,

any position in prison,
I've held it, including inmate.

Sorry, cell block Sally,
we're not hiring.

But you need me!

[ Ripping ]

Her shirt got stuck.

Yeah, that's
the mainland's problem now.

Okay, using the technique
I just taught you,

att*ck me.

Whoo-hoo!

Not all at once.

Just everybody take five.

Okay?
Let's just take five.

Thank you. Thank you.
You take ten.

This is ridiculous.

There are too many kids
here for me

to train them
all at the same time.

[ Sighs ] And I don't
want a single student

to be denied
the Donald Davenport experience.

You mean
the Bionic Academy experience.

No, you mean
the Bionic Academy experience.

Hey, maybe I can design

a new virtual
training simulator.

And each group
can take turns using it.

Or even better,

I can design one
that will allow every student

to train at the same time.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

If anyone's gonna design
this thing it's gonna be me.

Control freak.

How about this, you guys
design it together.

After all, two minds
are better than one.

Unless of course it's this mind.

And then after that,
maybe you can build something

that'll shrink his ego.

Bree, there's no machine
in the world that could do that.

But if anybody could build it,
it'd be me.

Oh.
Hey, Bob, what are you doing?

Drawing a self portrait.

It's just a butt.

I got to start somewhere.

[ Beeping ]

Whoa!
A mission alert.

A dam broke
and a group of hikers got caught

in a flash flood.

I'll go get Mr. Davenport.

No, wait.

What?

What are you doing?

Why would you delete
a mission alert?

Because we are going
on that mission.

No way.
Uh-uh.

I'm not getting in trouble.

Again.

Bob,
we're the youngest guys here.

Until we prove ourselves,

nobody is gonna
take us seriously.

Well, look at us.

Can you blame them?

Okay.
Fine, we won't go.

Good.

So you want to go
get something to eat?

I know this great restaurant
by a broken dam.

I don't know.

They'll let you draw butts
on the placemats.

Let's do this.

All right, a few more tweaks
and we should be done.

I have to admit,

this is working out
way better than I thought.

I know, I figured
you were going to ignore me

and do all the work yourself.

And I thought you were gonna be
totally incompetent.

ADAM: Incoming!

Get up!

[ Charlie groaning ]

Adam, what are you doing?

Seeing if Charlie here
has the ability to fly.

So far the answer is no.

Get out.

Can you do that somewhere else?

We're working here.

Fine.

Okay, where were we?

[ Charlie groans ]

Adam, I thought I told you to go
do that somewhere else.

Yeah, you know
I thought about that

and then I just decided
to ignore you.

Come on, Sebastian,

let's move our stuff before
one of those idiots ruins it.

[ Adam groans ]

[ clattering ]
Hey!

Adam!
Look what you did!

Hey, don't blame me,
blame Charlie.

He can't fly
but he sure can throw.

Can you believe him?

He just destroyed
all of our hard work.

Don't worry, Chase,
we can fix this.

And when we're done,

we're gonna need someone
to test it on.

And I think
it's time we give Adam

a taste of his own medicine.

Where have you been all my life?

Okay, let's test our
new video conferencing system.

I'll try and call you.

You rang?

Turn it off!
Turn it off!

How did you break
into my secure line?

Better question is,

how did I get in your
equipment room to steal this.

Give me that.

Or into your bedroom
to steal this.

That is island wear.

Mm-hmm.

Still think you don't need
a head of security?

No.

A couple more tweaks
and I'll have this place

locked down tight.

And then we will
never see you again.

Bree, any parting words?

Yes. Get out.
Mm-hmm.

But you need me.

No, we don't.

Wait, wait, wait.

[ Ripping ]

Really?

She needs to start
wearing tighter clothes.

No, she doesn't.
No, she doesn't.

I can't believe
those rescue workers

got to the hikers before we did.

I can't believe
we can't find that restaurant.

I can't believe you still
believe we're looking for it.

Argh!

This is so frustrating.

If I don't complete a mission,
I'll never prove myself.

[ Squishing ]

Uh, Spin,
I think we have bigger problems.

Oh, no, that's quicksand.

Yep, that's exactly
what I thought

when I was sinking into it.

I can't get out.

I'm sinking.

Try using
your levitation ability.

Good idea.

[ Grunting ]

Okay, stop.

Even if it works I don't want to
hear that anymore.

Maybe you should just call
for help.

No.

I can rescue you myself.

Close your eyes,
I'm gonna try to spin you out.

Uh-oh.

Relax,

once you get used to it,
it's a good squishy.

Okay, I'll call Leo.

Cool, tell him I said hi.

[ Phone beeps ]

Mission veteran Dooley speaking.

Leo, it's Spin.

It's a long story,
but Bob and I left the island

and we need your help.

What a surprise.

You need my help?

Just hurry!

Fine, I'll track your
GPS location and be right there.

What?

You didn't tell him I said hi.

Hey, Adam, how would you like
to be the first to test out

our brand new
bionic training simulator?

Oh, hold on.

You want me
to be your human guinea pig?

Well, I wouldn't say...

I'm in.

Here, put these on. They'll
sync with your bionic chip

to give you
the ultimate sensory experience.

Anything that happens
in the virtual world

will feel totally real.

What's the vest for?

That part's a surprise.

Whoa!

It looks like I'm in a jungle.

And what do you feel?

Oh, feel like I'm in the jungle
with you talking to me.

[ Monkey screeches ]
Aw, look.

It's a cute little monkey.

Aw, and he's holding
a cute little bazooka.

Wait, why is he holding
a bazooka?

Whoa... whoa!

He sh*t at me.

Argh!
That's it.

I'm gonna use my heat vision.

That doesn't work
in a virtual world.

[ Monkey screeches ]

Oh, no, the monkey called
for back-up.

Now there's a ton of a...

[ biffing ]

[ groans ]

They got me.

Oh, man, that didn't feel
virtual at all.

Wait until you feel this.

[ Biffing ]

[ grunts ]

Wait, does this thing have
any weapons I can use?

Of course.
Oh, good.

But unfortunately
those are sold separately.

What?

[ Grunts ]

Okay,

I reset the security settings.

So the island is finally on lock-down?
Mm-hmm.

Nobody in, nobody out?

Yep, and I control it all
with this one remote.

PERY: Yoo-hoo!

Looking for this?

[ Both grunting ]

What's taking Leo so long?

Maybe he got stuck
in quicksand, too.

Well, well, well.

Leo!

What do we do?

Well, first things first.

I'm sorry,
but this is hilarious.

Take another one,
my eyes were closed.

What are you even doing here?

Well, we got a mission alert
about...

Wait, mission alert?

You two went on a mission alone?

Why would you do that?

Well, I was promised
a fine dining experience.

I just wanted to prove
I was ready to go on missions.

The same way you did.

The only difference is,
I was awesome

and you're stuck in mud.

Look, I get it.

But just like Big D said,
focus on your training.

Trust me, you'll get there.

Thanks, Leo.

Aw, this would be
such a nice moment

if I could feel my legs.

Uh, what are you gonna
do with that?

I think he's gonna put us
out of our misery.

No. No. No.

I'm gonna use this as a lever
to push you out from below.

Here goes.

[ Grunting ]

It's working.

Leo, you saved us.

Oh!

That was awesome.

Oh, no, I lost
my cell phone in there.

Don't worry, I'll get it.

Wait, Bob, no!
Bob, no!

[ Squishing ]

Can we just leave him here?

I'm thinking about it.

[ Biffing ]

I have to find cover.

I'm heading for that mountain.

Oh, good idea,
except it's not a mountain.

It's a volcano.

Hot lava.

Hot lava.

It burns.

It burns.

Wow, that was awesome.

We work pretty well together.

Yeah, we do.

You might even say
we're becoming...

friends.

Yeah, which is pretty weird

considering the two of us
tried to k*ll each other.

You know, I still haven't
gotten that whole story.

What actually happened?

Well, I'm probably
not supposed to say anything,

but...

the guy who created you
was pure evil.

His name was Victor Krane.

He controlled your minds

and he made you
his bionic soldiers.

Why would he do that
if he was our father?

It was all
part of his twisted plan

to build a superior bionic race.

The only way to stop him
was to take him out.

So we did what we had to do.

Wow.

Yeah.

But at least you're safe now.

Yeah.

I guess I'm just lucky
Mr. Davenport

was nice enough to take us in.

Whoa!

They're still after me!

I can't take it anymore!

Shut it off!

Shut it off!

Oh.

Oh, that wall felt so real.

Where were you guys?

On a mission.

What?
Don't worry.

We didn't help anyone.

Leo, how could you
take them on a mission?

No, he didn't take us,
he saved us.

It was all my fault.

If it wasn't for Leo,

we wouldn't be
standing here right now.

Is that true?

Well, I don't want to brag,
but, yes, I was there.

And I was awesome.

You two head over
to the capsule dorms

to get cleaned up.

We'll discuss this later.

Wow, Leo, it sounds like
you really stepped up

and acted like
a true bionic hero.

I think it's time
we bump you up a color.

Really?

Bob, I thought I told you
to go back to the dorms.

You might have told Bob...

but you didn't tell me.

Ahh!
Who let that in here?

Stay away, evil woman!

Where did you get that
cyber cloak?

From your equipment room,
which, by the way,

is still not secure.

You know, if I was your
head of security,

I could have stopped those
two runts from sneaking out.

And no one would have to
know that you wear these.

Give me those.

You're not gonna stop this

until I give you this job,
are you?

Nope, and I've got nothing
but time.

The average lifespan
of a Perry is 112 years.

And I'm one of the healthy ones.

Ah-ahem.

Okay, fine.
You win.

You're hired.

Whoo, ka-ta-ta-ta-ta!

Ka-to!

Leo, where are you going?

To bury myself in quicksand.

Ladies and gentlemen,

Chase Davenport and Sebastian...

last name to be determined,

proudly present to you
the future of bionic education:

the Bionic Training Simulator.

Now to demonstrate,
we'll need a volunteer.

How about
Mr. Davenport?

I mean, he is the reason
we're all here.

What, me be
the center of attention?

I couldn't.

Go ahead and power up
the mainframe.

Alrighty.

Mr. Davenport!

That's nothing.

Wait till he meets the monkeys.

[ Groans ]

Big D, are you all right?

I think so.

I don't get it.

Our design was flawless.

No, come on,
let's get him to the medic.

Good idea, go.

You took away my father...

I'm gonna take away yours.