MUSIC IN:
INT. TONY'S HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
TONY: So what do you think?
ZIVA: Not bad, I suppose.
TONY: Not bad she says as she walks in from the outdoor patio, past the fax machine and the mini-bar, complimentary basket of fruit. This is the perfect way to spend a weekend. Come on! Big screen TV! Ooh! Two hundred channels. Look at this. HBO, ESPN, The Mystery Channel. Turner Classic Movies. I take it you're not interested in the premium channels?
ZIVA: There's only one thing I'm interested in right now.
(MUSIC OVER ACTION)
(MUSIC OUT)
(THEME MUSIC UP OVER OPENING TITLE/SCENES/ CREDITS AND OUT)
FADE IN:
INT. HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
"UNDER COVERS"
ZIVA: Do you think they bought it?
TONY: I did.
ZIVA: That's fairly obvious.
TONY: For your information that's my knee.
ZIVA: Whatever. You can get off of me now.
TONY: It's only been ten minutes. I have a reputation to protect.
ZIVA: We're not even sure if we're under surveillance yet, Tony.
TONY: You can't be too careful when you're undercover. Let's give it another forty minutes, just to be realistic.
ZIVA: Realistic, huh?
TONY: Uh-huh.
ZIVA: In that case...
(F/X: TONY AND ZIVA ROLL OVER)
ZIVA: I'm right on top.
TONY: I can live with that.(SFX: TONY GROANS)
TONY: What was that for?
ZIVA: Because that was definitely not your knee.
CUT TO:
INT. AUTOPSY ROOM - DAY
DUCKY: Oh, she's very beautiful, Jethro.
GIBBS: Her name's Sophie Ranier. She's m*rder*d over twenty five people, Ducky.
DUCKY: Yeah, and her friend?
GIBBS: Her husband. Jean Paul Ranier. Both Canadian citizens, both contract assassins.
DUCKY: She suffered extensive injuries. It may take quite a while to determine the actual cause of death.
GIBBS: They were k*lled in a car accident two days ago outside of Kuwait International Airport. Here's the accident report.
DUCKY: I'm assuming this is urgent. I've waited three months to see Giselle.
GIBBS: Yeah, apologies about the girlfriend, Duck. But I do need you to...
SHEPARD: Giselle's a ballet, Gibbs. You really should get out of your basement more, Jethro.
(INTERCUT FLASHBACK SCENES)
SHEPARD: We need to know everything we can about these two, Ducky.
DUCKY: Why is NCIS investigating this?
SHEPARD: Marine C.I.D. found two fake U.S. passports and two first-class tickets for Washington, D.C. in their luggage.
GIBBS: They have reservations at the Barclay through November tenth.
DUCKY: The Marine Corps' birthday.
GIBBS: They're holding the ball there. Hosted by the Commandant of the Marine Corps.
SHEPARD: Our top m*llitary leaders, Congressmen and Agency Directors will be there, including me.
GIBBS: Tony and Ziva have taken their room reservations at the Barclay. They're there now pretending to be these two. They're working blind, Duck.
SHEPARD: We're counting on you to fill them in on some of the more personal details of our couple.
DUCKY: Oh, though it may be common knowledge that I talk to my patients. Unfortunately, to date, none of them have ever answered me back.
GIBBS: Listen harder.
CUT TO:
INT. HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
TONY: Sweetheart, you know what I could really use right now?
ZIVA: Some deodorant?
TONY: I was thinking more along the lines of a back massage.
ZIVA: Good idea. Why don't you roll over like a good boy?
TONY: Oh, wow. Oh, and to think my mother thought I was too good for you. Ow!
(SFX: TONY GASPS)
CUT TO:
INT. FREEMONT HOTEL - NIGHT
(DOOR OPENS/ CLOSES)
YUSSIF: What'd I miss?
MAYA: They had sex.
YUSSIF: Did they have any contact with anyone yet?
MAYA: Just each other. Multiple times.
YUSSIF: Was it good for you?(KNOCK ON DOOR)
MAYA: Wait. Someone's knocking at their door.
ZIVA: (V.O./FILTERED) Who is it?
MCGEE: (V.O./FILTERED) Room service.
MAYA: Room service.
CUT TO:
INT. TONY HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
MCGEE: Compliments of the hotel management. (WHISPERS) Gibbs wants me to sweep the room for bugs and plant some of our own. And he also wants to talk to you.
ZIVA: You can put it over there, please.
MCGEE: Very good, Ma'am.
ZIVA: Garcon...
CUT TO:
INT. MTAC - NIGHT
ZIVA: (V.O./FILTERED) We'd like some extra bath towels.
MCGEE: (V.O./FILTERED) Of course.
CUT TO:
INT. TONY'S HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
MCGEE: Just checking to make sure everything's in order. Would you like me to have the maid make up the bed for you, Sir?
TONY: Oh, that won't be necessary.
CUT TO:
INT. YUSSIF'S HOTEL ROOM
ZIVA: (V.O./FILTERED) Oh, and will you check the mini bar? We'd like it restocked with Red Bull.
CUT TO:
INT. TONY'S HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
MCGEE: Red Bull. That'll keep you up all night, Ma'am.
ZIVA: Exactly.
MCGEE: Please accept this assortment of cheeses compliments of the hotel.
CUT TO:
INT. YUSSIF'S HOTEL ROOM
YUSSIF: What's wrong?
MAYA: Room service put a tray on our microphone.
YUSSIF: Well you know what that means.
MAYA: We're screwed?
YUSSIF: Nope. You get to dress up as a maid, Maya.
CUT TO:
INT. TONY'S HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
MCGEE: If you whisper, it should be okay.
CUT TO:
INT. MTAC - NIGHT
GIBBS: Comfortable, DiNozzo?
TONY: (ON MONITOR) Well, yeah. I'm working on it. Why do you ask?
SHEPARD: We're looking at you, Agent DiNozzo. All of you.
CUT TO:
INT. TONY'S HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
TONY: Ah, sorry about that.
GIBBS: (V.O./FILTERED) DiNozzo...
CUT TO:
INT. MTAC - NIGHT
GIBBS: What the hell are you doing? You're married assassins. You're not visiting the Playboy mansion.
TONY: (V.O./FILTERED) It was kind of Ziva's idea, boss.
CUT TO:
INT. TONY'S HOTEL - NIGHT
(PHONE RINGS)
TONY: Incoming call.
CUT TO:
INT. MTAC - NIGHT
SHEPARD: Have her answer it.
CUT TO:
INT. TONY'S HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
(PHONE RINGS)
TONY: Sweet cheeks, do you think you could go over and answer the phone for me while I pour us some champagne? (TO ZIVA) Thanks, honey.
(BEGIN TELEPHONE INTERCUTS)
ZIVA: (INTO PHONE) Yes.
(SCENE CUT)
MARCOS: (INTO PHONE) There's a cell phone in the Bible next to your bed.
(SCENE CUT)
ZIVA: (INTO PHONE) Got it.
(SCENE CUT)
MARCOS: (INTO PHONE) Keep it with you at all times.
(SCENE CUT)
MARCOS: (V.O./FILTERED) You have dinner reservations at the hotel dining room at nine o'clock.
(SCENE CUT)
MARCOS: (INTO PHONE) Don't be late.(END TELEPHONE INTERCUTS)
CUT TO:
INT. TONY'S HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
ZIVA: The concierge. We were able to get into the dining room after all, my love. It looks like I'm getting dressed up for you tonight.
CUT TO:
INT. MTAC - DAY
GIBBS: That wasn't the concierge. That was their contact.
CUT TO:
INT. YUSSIF'S HOTEL ROOM
MAYA: We're on the move. Let's go. We've got to get dressed for dinner.
YUSSIF: I'm coming.
CUT TO:
INT. AUTOPSY ROOM - NIGHT
(SFX: DOORS SLIDE OPEN)
ABBY: Don't look at me that way, Gibbs. It was league night when I got your nine-one-one. I was two frames away from a perfect score. And just for the record, the stupid outfits were not my idea.
GIBBS: I like it.
ABBY: It is kind of cute, huh?
DUCKY: No sign of Mister Palmer I suppose.
ABBY: Not since this afternoon, Ducky.
GIBBS: Abs, these are their personal effects. Get yourself wired so you can feed whatever you find directly to DiNozzo and David.
ABBY: Looking for anything in particular?
GIBBS: Yeah, anything that will help those two act like them.
(SFX: DOORS SLIDE CLOSED)
CUT TO:
INT. RESTAURANT - NIGHT
GIBBS: (V.O./FILTERED) Solid on the visuals, Tony.
TONY: (V.O./FILTERED) There's quite a crowd here tonight. See anyone (ON CAMERA) you know, Sweet Cheeks?
ZIVA: Not yet. But the night's just getting started, my little hairy butt.
CUT TO:
INT. LAB - NIGHT
GIBBS: Abs?
ABBY: I'm loading the photos into the computer.
GIBBS: Duck, got any scoop for our married couple?
DUCKY: I have the breakdown of the contents of their stomachs and intestines. If Mister Ranier had lived, I would have suggested a more fiber rich diet.
CUT TO:
INT. RESTAURANT - NIGHT
DUCKY: (V.O./FILTERED) His colon was almost impacted with fecal material.
MAITRE D'(in b.g. to MAYA/YUSSIF) Good evening, table for two?
TONY: Do you think it's too late to order a salad?
ZIVA: I believe our food is here. Bon appetite mon petit bout.
CUT TO:
INT. LAB - NIGHT
GIBBS: McGee, (V.O.) report.
CUT TO:
INT. RESTAURANT - NIGHT
MCGEE: I've got the restaurant covered from the entrance, Boss.
(CAMERA ANGLE ON TONY)
TONY: I'm a meat and potatoes kind of guy.
CUT TO:
INT. AUTOPSY ROOM
DUCKY: Tony, the calluses on Mister Ranier's hand....
CUT TO:
INT. RESTAURANT - NIGHT
DUCKY: (V.O./FILTERED)... Suggest he was left handed.
GIBBS: (V.O./FILTERED) Switch hands, DiNozzo.
ZIVA: This is nice, isn't it?
TONY: Yeah, a quiet little dinner....just the six of us.
(PHONE RINGS)
ZIVA: Our friend is calling.
CUT TO:
INT. LAB - NIGHT
GIBBS: Abs, I want that number.
ABBY: Got it.
ABBY: Starting the reverse search directory now.
CUT TO:
INT. RESTAURANT - NIGHT
ZIVA: (INTO PHONE) I'm glad you called. We were getting bored.(BEGIN TELEPHONE INTERCUTS)
(SCENE CUT)
MARCOS: (INTO PHONE) I thought it would help to see your target in person tonight.
(SCENE CUT)
ZIVA: (INTO PHONE) He's here?
MARCOS: (V.O./FILTERED) You don't see him?
ZIVA: (INTO PHONE) Relax, I'm been flying for over twenty hours. (V.O.) And the restaurant's packed. We will.
CUT TO:
INT. LAB - NIGHT
GIBBS: Talk to me, Abs.
ABBY: He's calling from a pay phone. The address is coming up.
CUT TO:
INT. RESTAURANT - NIGHT
ZIVA: (INTO PHONE) You didn't mention anything about being surrounded by U.S. Marines.
(SCENE CUT)
ZIVA: (V.O./FILTERED) It's too dangerous for the sum you're paying us.
MARCOS: (INTO PHONE) Accomplish your mission, we'll discuss more.
(SCENE CUT)
ZIVA: (INTO PHONE) But you won't pay us more.
CUT TO:
INT. LAB - NIGHT
ABBY: Got it! Two, two oh five "M" Street. He's calling from a pay phone...
CUT TO:
INT. RESTAURANT - NIGHT
ABBY: (V.O./FILTERED) ....Inside the restaurant!
GIBBS: (V.O./FILTERED) DiNozzo! McGee!
MCGEE: Already moving.
TONY: I have to go to the little boy's room.
CUT TO:
INT. HOTEL LOBBY
MARCOS: (INTO PHONE) I have to talk to my boss.
(SCENE CUT)
ZIVA: (INTO PHONE) Do that. We'll wait for you to - he hung up.(END TELEPHONE INTERCUTS)
CUT TO:
INT. LOBBY - NIGHT
MCGEE: Don't move! Federal Agent!
TONY: It's me, Probie. He's gone.
(MUSIC OUT)
MUSIC IN:
INT. RESTAURANT - NIGHT
TONY: Must've slipped out through the kitchen. (V.O./FILTERED) I didn't even get a look. (ON CAMERA) You want us back at the squad room, Boss?
GIBBS: (V.O./FILTERED) No.(BEGIN TELEPHONE INTERCUTS)
(SCENE CUT)
GIBBS: I want you and Ziva back in your room, maintaining your cover.
(SCENE CUT)
TONY: Oh, all night?
(SCENE CUT)
GIBBS: Do I stutter or something, DiNozzo?(END TELEPHONE INTERCUTS)
(SCENE CUT)
ZIVA: Afraid I'll bite, Tony?
TONY: The name is Jean Paul, Sophie.
ZIVA: Jean Paul.
CUT TO:
INT. LAB - NIGHT
GIBBS: Hey Abs, what do you got?
ABBY: I have a "whoopee" and I have a "but."
GIBBS: Abby...
ABBY: Whoopee I've got a photo of the man that Tony and Ziva are going to assassinate.
GIBBS: But?
ABBY: But... I have no idea which of these thirty two photos is him.
CUT TO:
INT. MTAC - NIGHT
SHEPARD: What makes you think the target's a male? Did you forget I'll be there?
GIBBS: Nope. Whoever set up the hit referred to the collar as a man.
SHEPARD: You've made contact.
GIBBS: Ziva got a pay-phone call.
SHEPARD: You trace it?
GIBBS: Gee, why didn't I think of that?
SHEPARD: Sorry, Jethro. I'm a little tired.
GIBBS: Yeah, well, you never could pace yourself very well.
(INTERCUT FLASHBACK SCENE)
SHEPARD: I have one word for you, Jethro.
GIBBS: Hmm...
SHEPARD: Positano.
GIBBS: Come on! That was a week after I took a b*llet.
SHEPARD: Uh-huh. Where did the call originate?
GIBBS: Pay phone in the hotel. We got there. The guy was gone.
SHEPARD: Uh-huh. Where did the call originate?
GIBBS: Pay phone in the hotel. We got there. The guy was gone.
SHEPARD: At lease we know he's here keeping tabs on the operation.
GIBBS: Abby's matching these photos with reservations in the restaurant. She'll check the names against invites to the ball. It'll narrow the target.
SHEPARD: What if the hit has nothing to do with the ball? Someone who's a guest at the hotel?
GIBBS: Ziva told him she didn't know the target would be surrounded by Marines.
SHEPARD: And he wasn't surprised?
GIBBS: No. (b*at) hey, nothing's going to happen tonight. Tony and Ziva are hitting the rack. All the back-up teams are in place around the hotel. Why don't you go grab forty on the couch in your office?
SHEPARD: No. I just need a little coffee.
GIBBS: Yeah? And when the caffeine jolt ends?
SHEPARD: I'll do what you do....get a refill.
GIBBS: You're not me.
SHEPARD: Chauvinist.
GIBBS: Yeah. Yeah. I guess. Good night, Jen.
SHEPARD: Jethro --.
GIBBS: Uh huh --
SHEPARD: I need to bounce something off you.
GIBBS: Okay, sh**t.
SHEPARD: My Director side is telling me to flood that hotel with security and notify the FBI of a potential t*rror1st att*ck. My agent side? If I do that, we lose the chance to take down an enemy cell operating inside the Capitol. They'll scatter. Of course, you'd stay the course. Trust your people to get the job done.
GIBBS: Are you telling me what I'd do?
SHEPARD: Asking.
GIBBS: If I was Director, I'd give my people another twenty four. They can't get the job done, I'd notify the FBI.
SHEPARD: You'd really do that?
GIBBS: Nah. But that's why I'll never be Director.
CUT TO:
INT. YUSSIF'S HOTEL ROOM
(SFX: SNORING B.G.)
YUSSIF: The man snores like a drunken sailor.(DOOR OPENS/ CLOSES)
MAYA: Well, we won't have to listen much longer. They saw their target at the restaurant. We're on plan.
YUSSIF: I watched the videotape of their session this afternoon, Maya. It's pretty hot stuff. Those two really know how to live their life. You... you ever think about that maybe...
MAYA: Forget it! We're here on a mission, period. You want something more than coffee, call room service.
CUT TO:
INT. TONY'S HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
(SFX: SNORING B.G.)
TONY: Oh my god! Ziva! Shh! Come on, you're k*lling me here! Sophie!
ZIVA: Oh! (b*at) What?
TONY: Nothing. I thought I heard something.
(ZIVA MUMBLES)
TONY: Crazy chick.
CUT TO:
INT. MTAC - NIGHT
ZIVA: (V.O.) I heard that, my little hairy butt.
CUT TO:
INT. SQUAD ROOM - DAY
MCGEE: Good morning, Boss. Thank you. Hey Boss, this was sitting on my front porch this morning.
GIBBS: What is it?
MCGEE: It's a package addressed to Ziva.
GIBBS: Well, yeah. I can see that, McGee. What is in it?
MCGEE: I wasn't sure if I should open it.
GIBBS: That's probably why she's using you as her mule.
(GIBBS OPENS THE BOX)
MCGEE: Sunglasses? With different lenses?
GIBBS: Why?
MCGEE: To protect her eyes? You know what, I'm going to ask her. I'm going to find out.
GIBBS: Yeah, good idea, McGee. Send them a wake-up call.
CUT TO:
INT. TONY'S HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
MCGEE: (V.O./FILTERED) Tony.
TONY: Hm?
MCGEE: (V.O./FILTERED) Hey, DiNozzo!
CUT TO:
INT. SQUAD ROOM - DAY
MCGEE: Tony! This is great. They're sleeping in a five star hotel. I'm a waiter.
ZIVA: (V.O./FILTERED) Want to trade places, McGee?
MCGEE: (V.O.) You're awake.
ZIVA: (ON MONITOR) Since zero five.
CUT TO:
INT. TONY'S HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
ZIVA: He snores.
CUT TO:
INT. SQUAD ROOM - DAY
MCGEE: I got a package here for you.
ZIVA: (ON MONITOR) My shades. (V.O.) Can you bring them up with breakfast?
MCGEE: (V.O.) Sure. (ON CAMERA) Gibbs wants Tony up, too.
ZIVA: (ON MONITOR) Huh. My pleasure.
CUT TO:
INT. TONY'S HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
ZIVA: Jean Paul, my little furry bear.(F/X: ZIVA POURS WATER ON TONY'S HEAD)
(F/X: TONY LEAPS FROM THE BED/SHOUTING)
ZIVA: Oh.
CUT TO:
INT. AUTOPSY ROOM - DAY
DUCKY: Make the stitches precise, Mister Palmer.
JIMMY: Uh, yes, Doctor.
DUCKY: And when you're done, I want the supply locker inventoried and cleaned.
JIMMY: I uh...actually already did that, Doctor.
DUCKY: Then do it again.(SFX: DOORS SLIDE OPEN)
GIBBS: What have we found out, Duck?
DUCKY: That my assistant, Mister Palmer here, should keep his cell phone with him and turned on at all times.
GIBBS: What can you tell me about our assassins?
DUCKY: Oh, Mister Ranier here had his appendix removed. Mrs. had her left wrist broken as a child. We did, however, find some rather curious markings.
GIBBS: Markings?
DUCKY: Well, tattoos might be the more appropriate word. Almost invisible to the naked eye. On the inside of the fourth digit on both of their left hands.
GIBBS: An eight?
DUCKY: Or the sign for infinity.
GIBBS: Some kind of t*rror1st cell ID?
DUCKY: On their ring fingers, perhaps it means love forever. You know, I want to take another look at the x-rays, make sure I didn't miss anything else.
GIBBS: Yeah, do it. You missed a stitch there, Palmer.
CUT TO:
INT. TONY'S HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
TONY: We really should take you to see the doctor, Sweet Cheeks.
ZIVA: Why's that?
TONY: Because you snore like a drunken sailor with emphysema.
ZIVA: Look who's calling the pot black.
TONY: Kettle. The pot is calling the kettle black.
ZIVA: Huh. I'd really like some music. Something with a little... b*at, dear.
TONY: Sorry.(SFX: MUSIC PLAYS B.G.)
TONY: What have we got?
ZIVA: Ooh, sneaky people.
CUT TO:
INT. SQUAD ROOM - DAY
ZIVA: (V.O./FILTERED) Top floor, northwest corner, Gibbs. They have a laser trained on our room.
MCGEE: I can't believe that your sunglasses can detect different light spectrums, Ziva. That's amazing.
GIBBS: DiNozzo, we're going to need a diversion.
TONY: (V.O./FILTERED) I think we can manage something, Boss.
GIBBS: Let's roll, McGee.
ABBY: Ziva, that is amazing. Big whoop, she has spy glasses. Anyone could do that. That's not amazing. She's just...
ZIVA: (V.O./FILTERED) Uh, you realize we can still hear you, right, Abby?
CUT TO:
INT. YUSSIF'S HOTEL ROOM
YUSSIF: I think I'm going to need a cold shower after this.
MAYA: Disgusting. Give me those binoculars!
CUT TO:
INT. TONY'S HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
(SFX: ZIVA MOANS B.G.)
TONY: I don't know how much longer I can keep this up.
ZIVA: (COUNTS) Ninety six, ninety seven, ninety eight...
CUT TO:
INT. HALLWAY - DAY
GIBBS: We're in position, DiNozzo. Give it the big finish.
CUT TO:
INT. YUSSIF'S HOTEL ROOM
YUSSIF: We could make a fortune with this off the Internet.
MAYA: They're serial K*llers, Yussif. I wouldn't recommend trying.
(SFX: DOOR BURSTS OPEN)
(SFX: ALL SHOUT OVER)
GIBBS: Put them down!
(MUSIC UP AND OUT)
FADE IN:
INT. SQUAD ROOM - DAY
(VOICES ON TV in b.g.)
MAYA: I have a whole new respect for NCIS, Agent McGee.
YUSSIF: You guys are hard-core.
MCGEE: We got lucky. It was actually the trained laser on the room that gave you away.
MAYA: We were talking about your agents pretending to be married assassins.
YUSSIF: Very convincing.
MAYA: I don't think anyone in the FBI would actually go all the way just to sell a cover story.
YUSSIF: I would.
MCGEE: Guys, they were acting.
YUSSIF: Trust me. I know when someone's acting when they're having sex.
MAYA: It's true. I've met his wife.
MCGEE: Tony and Ziva wouldn't....
TONY: (ON MONITOR) It's unusual for a man to like Love Story.
CUT TO:
INT. BALCONY - DAY
SHEPARD: How do I explain to the Director of the FBI that we're running an undercover op in his jurisdiction without informing him?
GIBBS: With a smile.
SHEPARD: It's not funny, Gibbs.
GIBBS: They had intel the two assassins were going to hit a target at the Marine Corps birthday ball. Did you get that memo?
SHEPARD: No. Why didn't I think of that?
GIBBS: Because you're exhausted. I told you get some sleep, and do that before you take on the Director of the FBI.
SHEPARD: I can't, Jethro.
GIBBS: I can fix this.
SHEPARD: How?
GIBBS: You're not the only one around here who knows how to play politics.
SHEPARD: You're not serious? Your idea of politics usually involves some form of physical v*olence.
GIBBS: Well, you know what they say, Jen. You can't make an omelet unless you break a few eggs.
CUT TO:
INT. SQUAD ROOM - DAY
(SFX: DOORS SLIDE OPEN)
MAYA: Are we free to go now?
FORNELL: Not yet. What the hell is NCIS doing at the Barclay, Gibbs?
GIBBS: Our job, Fornell.
FORNELL: Yeah? That involve jeopardizing our operation?
GIBBS: You're damn lucky we didn't blow these two away!
FORNELL: Which wouldn't have happened if you hadn't strayed into our jurisdiction!
GIBBS: Conference room. Now.
FORNELL: So anxious to play with the big boys.
GIBBS: Really? Big boys my ass.
(GIBBS AND FORNELL WALK TO THE ELEVATOR)
MCGEE: Yeah, this is going to be ugly.
MAYA: Oh, yeah. Fornell hasn't been this upset since...
YUSSIF: The last time we saw him.
CUT TO:
INT. ELEVATOR - DAY
(SFX: ELEVATOR DINGS/DOORS SLIDE OPEN/ CLOSED)
FORNELL: Gum?
GIBBS: The big boys?
FORNELL: We really screwed this one up.
GIBBS: Oh, you think, Tobias?
FORNELL: The question is, how do we fix it without our Directors getting into a world class pissing match?
GIBBS: Joint op.
FORNELL: Who's lead?
GIBBS: My team's already in place.
FORNELL: Did you find out who hired them yet?
GIBBS: Not yet. Working on it.
FORNELL: I need more than that if I'm going to tap dance at the Hoover building, Jethro.
GIBBS: Give us twenty four hours, then we flip.
FORNELL: FBI gets operational control?
GIBBS: Yeah, and credit for the collar.
FORNELL: Agreed. The Directors get to save face and we...
GIBBS: Get the job done.
FORNELL: And people say we're bastards?
GIBBS: Only because they know us.
(FOURNELL CHUCKLES)
(SFX: DOORS SLIDE OPEN)
CUT TO:
INT. LAB - DAY
CHIP: I've got the IDs on the people in the restaurant who have invites to the Marine Corps Ball, Ma'am. Uh... Abby. Sorry.
ABBY: Make sure Tony and Ziva get them.
CHIP: Should I also check the restaurant staff, too?
ABBY: International assassins hired to take out a waiter.
CHIP: I was just trying to be thorough.
ABBY: No, it's good. Good instincts, Chip. Run 'em.
CHIP: Okay. Abby, can I ask you a question?
ABBY: Yes.
CHIP: Why don't you like Officer David?
ABBY: What makes you think I don't like her?
CHIP: I found this.
ABBY: Oh. That.
CHIP: Oh, I understand. I have the same problem with DiNozzo.
ABBY: Tony is a great guy. You just have to get to know him.
CHIP: Yeah, well you don't know him like I do.
ABBY: He always gives new people grief. He learned that from Gibbs. Okay, quiz time. What's your take on Sophie Ranier's blood test?
CHIP: Well, she's got elevated levels of human chorionic gonadotropin.
ABBY: Which means?
CHIP: She's pregnant?
ABBY: Good, Chip. She's pregnant.
GIBBS: Who's pregnant?
ABBY: Ziva. I mean, not Ziva, Ziva, but Sophie Ranier, our dead hit girl. She's got a bun in the oven.
CUT TO:
INT. TONY'S HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
MAYA: Like what you see, Agent DiNozzo? The room's clean except for the listening devices we installed. We're free to talk.
TONY: Yeah, so you're the one who's been watching us?
MAYA: Oh, yeah. When this is over, we really should go out for drinks.
TONY: I'd like that.
ZIVA: I'm pregnant, Tony.
MAYA: Maybe some other time.
TONY: She... she was kidding.
ZIVA: Something wrong?
TONY: Thanks.
ZIVA: Oh, she's really not your type anyway.
TONY: Hot and in a maid's outfit? They don't get any more my type.(PHONE RINGS)
ZIVA: He's learning. Number's blocked.
TONY: (INTO PHONE) Talk to me.(BEGIN TELEPHONE INTERCUTS)
(SCENE CUT)
MARCOS: (INTO PHONE) I've been told to negotiate a price commensurate with the risk.
(SCENE CUT)
TONY: (INTO PHONE) I'm listening.
MARCOS: (V.O./FILTERED) Not on the phone. Be in the lobby in exactly one hour.
(SCENE CUT)
MARCOS: (INTO PHONE) A black Lincoln will be waiting out front. Make sure you're not followed.
(SCENE CUT)
MCGEE: (INTO PHONE) In position, Boss.
(SCENE CUT)
GIBBS: Your people set, Tobias?
FORNELL: Got four unmarked vehicles standing by. We'll be able to follow them wherever they go.
GIBBS: (INTO PHONE) Tony, Ziva, get ready to roll. Hour's almost up.
(SCENE CUT)
TONY: (INTO PHONE) Roger that, Boss. (TO ZIVA) You haven't fired your w*apon, so it's already cleaned.(END TELEPHONE INTERCUTS)
ZIVA: It calms my mind. Forces me to stay focused at the job in my hand.
TONY: The term's "job at hand."
ZIVA: Same difference. Is something wrong?
TONY: Just trying to picture you pregnant.
ZIVA: Don't.
TONY: I have to. I'm going to be a father. It's a great responsibility.
ZIVA: Maybe it's not yours.
TONY: Maybe she didn't know.
ZIVA: Oh, she knew.
TONY: So why take this contract, put our unborn child in danger?
ZIVA: Perhaps we needed the money.
TONY: Kids are expensive.
ZIVA: b*ll*ts are cheap. There's a big chance this meeting is a set-up, Tony.
TONY: Are you scared?
ZIVA: Nope. Excited.
CUT TO:
EXT. STREET - DAY
MCGEE: (INTO PHONE) No sign of the Lincoln yet.(BEGIN TELEPHONE INTERCUTS)
GIBBS: (V.O./FILTERED) That's a solid copy, McGee.
(SCENE CUT)
GIBBS: (INTO PHONE) We're sending them down.
FORNELL: (INTO PHONE) All mobile units prepare to roll on my mark.(END TELEPHONE INTERCUTS)
SHEPARD: This reminds me of our op in the former Czech Republic.
GIBBS: You took a round in the thigh.
SHEPARD: I had the same bad feeling before that op, too.
CUT TO:
INT. HALLWAY - DAY
TONY: We're on our way to the elevator, Boss.
GIBBS: (V.O./FILTERED) Tony, Ziva....
CUT TO:
INT. MTAC - DAY
GIBBS: We're not taking any chances on this one. First sign it goes bad you call it.
CUT TO:
INT. HALLWAY - DAY
(SFX: ELEVATOR DINGS)
TONY: Hold the door! Thanks.
HENRY: Sure.
TONY: Sweetheart.
CUT TO:
EXT. HOTEL - DAY
MCGEE: (INTO PHONE) Okay, black Lincoln just pulled up.
CUT TO:
INT. MTAC - DAY
GIBBS: (INTO PHONE) Yeah, I got a visual on that, McGee.
CUT TO:
INT. LAB - DAY
CHIP: I got a match! Abby!
CUT TO:
EXT. HOTEL - DAY
MCGEE: A man and a woman just got out. Heading into the hotel.
CUT TO:
INT. MTAC - DAY
MCGEE: (V.O./FILTERED) Car's leaving.
GIBBS: I can see that, McGee!
FORNELL: All units, hold your positions. That's not our Lincoln.
CUT TO:
INT. LAB - DAY
CHIP: The waiter's got a warrant out on him.
ABBY: For what?
CHIP: m*rder.
CUT TO:
INT. ELEVATOR - DAY
(MUSIC OVER ACTION/HENRY PULLS OUT A g*n)
(MUSIC OUT)
MUSIC IN:
INT. ELEVATOR - DAY
(SFX: ELEVATOR DINGS)
HENRY: You're getting off here.
(SFX: ELEVATOR DINGS/DOORS SLIDE OPEN)
MARCOS: Not a wise choice, Mister and Mrs. Ranier. Weapons.
ZIVA: We would have come to the third floor ourselves. Three armed escorts seems a bit excessive.
MARCOS: Very good. Our location and our number in two sentences. It's too bad your friends can't hear you.
HENRY: You're being jammed.
MARCOS: Bring them to my room. If they resist? sh**t the woman.
HENRY: Come on, let's go.
CUT TO:
INT. MTAC - DAY
GIBBS: Tony, Ziva, do you copy? DiNozzo! I said, do you copy? McGee! What the hell is going on there?
MCGEE: (ON MONITOR) Boss, they're not in their room. They never arrived in the lobby.
FORNELL: My teams have the entire outside of the building covered. They didn't leave the hotel, Gibbs.
SHEPARD: Last contact was at the elevator. That leaves eleven floors they could have gotten off at.
GIBBS: Eleven floors, McGee! How many rooms are we looking at?
MCGEE: (ON MONITOR) Um... well if we don't count individual bathrooms and closets...
GIBBS: McGee!
MCGEE: (ON MONITOR) Two hundred, sixty four hotel rooms, twenty two utility rooms.
GIBBS: They haven't checked in because they can't.
SHEPARD: They're at the meet right now?
GIBBS: They removed their earwigs and they dumped their comm when it was changed to the hotel.
FORNELL: We go room by room. My people seal off the exterior...
SHEPARD: No! We wait.
FORNELL: What for?
SHEPARD: For Ziva to contact us. We move now, we blow their cover, Fornell.
FORNELL: And if their cover is already blown, Director?
CUT TO:
INT. HOTEL ROOM - DAY
(SFX: HENRY SMASHES THE EAR PIECE)
MARCOS: There are two things you should be painfully aware of right now. One, no one leaves this business. And two, never thr*aten the people who employ you.
TONY: Should I be writing this down?
(SFX: CORD HITS TONY)
TONY: I take that as a no.
MARCOS: Where is the disk?
ZIVA: What disk?
(SFX: CORD HITS TONY)
MARCOS: Where, Mrs. Ranier?
ZIVA: What makes you think we have it?
MARCOS: We spotted your backup at the restaurant. On some level, you must have known this was going to happen.
ZIVA: Oh. Observant. How much is our disk worth to you?
(SFX: CORD HITS TONY)
MARCOS: I have a better question. What's it worth to you?
CUT TO:
INT. LAB - DAY
ABBY: It's bad news. It's very, very bad. Remember when we missed grabbing the guy in the restaurant?
GIBBS: Mm-hmm.
ABBY: Well, Tony said he didn't see anything. But the eye sees more than we think it does. It's the brain that misses stuff. It has to do with the f*ring of the optic nerve and the visual cortex's...
GIBBS: You found something from Tony's camera.
ABBY: Well, I went to the feed frame by frame. Now, Tony is looking at the pay phone because that's where he thinks the target is. But a camera doesn't think. It just records. So when he runs past the kitchen door of the restaurant, he got... this.
GIBBS: Our bad guy. Run it. I want a name.
ABBY: I do. I did. Marcos Ceasan. He's a contract assassin, Gibbs. He's wanted in more than five countries. It doesn't make any sense. Why would a k*ller hire other K*llers to do a hit for him?
CUT TO:
INT. HOTEL ROOM - DAY
MARCOS: Out of professional courtesy, I've had Mister Cord go lightly on your husband.
TONY: And I appreciate that.
MARCOS: Unfortunately we're running out of time.
ZIVA: If you let him go, I'll tell you where the disk is.
MARCOS: You'll tell me either way, Mrs. Ranier. Why don't you two take a moment and consider your options?
(MEN WALK O.S.)
TONY: I might have a plan.
ZIVA: What?
TONY: The Raniers obviously stole something they want. You're going to give it to them.
ZIVA: We don't have it.
TONY: You're going to tell them it's in our hotel room. The only way they'll find it is if you show them. McGee should be waiting for us in there.
ZIVA: Good plan, except for one minor drawback.
TONY: What?
ZIVA: When I leave, they'll most likely put a b*llet through your head.
TONY: Oh. Well, I didn't say it was a perfect plan.
CUT TO:
INT. AUTOPSY ROOM - DAY
DUCKY: Two centimeters below the supra orbital notch. What do you make of it, Mister Palmer? I originally assumed it was a spec of dirt on the exposure.
JIMMY: It appears to be a heart?
DUCKY: Yes. (CHUCKLES) A strange place to find one. Don't you agree? It appears to be gold surgically embedded in the conjunctive layer. Perhaps some type of body jewelry.
JIMMY: Jewelry embedded in an eye.
DUCKY: Oh, yes. You'd be amazed what people do to themselves. To Abby, please.
JIMMY: You know, I doubt anyone would notice your little gold heart unless they knew it was there. Staring into your eyes, face to face... like a lover.
CUT TO:
INT. LAB - DAY
ABBY: I found a chip in it.
CHIP: Flash memory embedded underneath, Sir. Five hundred megabyte capacity. Fifty MPS throughout.
ABBY: Translation, it contains the Raniers' personal data in two files. One has a list of numbered bank accounts, a deed for a restaurant, a house in Gilead, Maine.
CHIP: We also ran the address. The phone service and cable are scheduled to be turned on next week, Sir.
FORNELL: Sounds like a retirement plan.
GIBBS: She was pregnant. They were getting out of the business. What about the other file?
ABBY: It has a list of their clients: their names, addresses, phone numbers, all their information. Everything.
FORNELL: Insurance policy?
GIBBS: Their ticket out.
FORNELL: They weren't hired to make a hit, Gibbs.
GIBBS: They are the hit.
CUT TO:
INT. MARCOS' ROOM - DAY
MARCOS: Did you know the Peruvians make blades so sharp, some people can't even feel the initial incision?
TONY: Stop! The disk's in our hotel room.
ZIVA: Don't! He'll only use it...
MARCOS: Where?
TONY: She has to show you.
MARCOS: Not what I asked.
TONY: You'll never find it without her, even if you k*ll us.
MARCOS: Untie her.
CUT TO:
INT. HALLWAY - DAY
(PHONE RINGS)
HENRY: (INTO PHONE) I'm in position.
CUT TO:
INT. MARCOS' ROOM - DAY
MARCOS: (INTO PHONE) Clear the room. I'm on my way up with the girl.
CUT TO:
INT. HALLWAY - DAY
HENRY: (INTO PHONE) My pleasure.
(DOOR OPENS)
CUT TO:
INT. HOTEL ROOM - DAY
(DOOR OPENS)
(MUSIC OVER ACTION)
CUT TO:
INT. MARCOS' ROOM - DAY
MARCOS: Your only mistake was going for one last big payday. You got greedy.
ZIVA: I'm pregnant.
MARCOS: Really? Congratulations. Boy or girl?
ZIVA: I don't know. We want to be surprised.
MARCOS: It's the best way, believe me. How many months?
TONY: Three!
MARCOS: Morning sickness?
TONY: Only every single day.
MARCOS: I hated to see my wife go through it, but believe me, it's all worth it in the end.
ZIVA: So you're not going to k*ll us?
MARCOS: We're assassins. You know we can't just walk away from the game when we feel like it. Hell, Don't you think I'd rather be at my daughter's fifth birthday than here?
TONY: So you are going to k*ll us? Right?
MARCOS: I haven't decided yet. Give me the disk and we'll see, play it by ear. (TO CORD) If I'm not back in five minutes, k*ll him.
(DOOR OPENS/ CLOSES)
CORD: That was purely for your wife's cooperation. We like to call them little white lies.
CUT TO:
INT. HALLWAY - DAY
MARCOS: Open it.
(DOOR OPENS)
CUT TO:
INT. TONY'S HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
MARCOS: I hope you weren't counting on your backup, Mrs. Ranier.
ZIVA: He's not my back up.
(SFX: GIBBS HITS MARCOS)
GIBBS: Tony?
ZIVA: Third floor, room three five six.
FORNELL: (INTO RADIO) All teams, third floor, room three five six. (V.O.) Federal agent in distress.
(VOICE: (V.O./FILTERED) Copy. We're moving.)
CUT TO:
INT. MARCOS' HOTEL ROOM - DAY
TONY: You know what's funny? I was really looking forward to having a kid there for a minute. That's a big step for me. Having a little DiNozzo running around.
CORD: DiNozzo?
TONY: Yeah, that's my full name. Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo, NCIS.
(MUSIC OVER ACTION/TONY FIGHTS CORD)
(SFX: CHAIR BREAKS)
TONY: How does that feel? Huh? Huh, big guy?(SFX: TONY CONTINUES b*ating CORD)
ZIVA: Enough!
TONY: You want to punch me again?! Come on!
ZIVA: Enough enough, Tony. I think you made your point.
TONY: I want a divorce.
CUT TO:
INT. SQUAD ROOM - DAY
DUCKY: The emergency room seems to have done a pretty good job. How do you feel?
TONY: Better, now that I can breath.
DUCKY: There doesn't appear to be any permanent damage. How many times did he hit you?
TONY: I wasn't counting.
ZIVA: Seven times.
TONY: She was, of course.
ZIVA: It was hard not to.
ABBY: We're going to take really good care of you, Tony. I had Chip pull your car right around front.
TONY: He drove my car?
CHIP: Just from your parking space. I took extra special care.
TONY: Oh, thanks.
ZIVA: And uh... I'm driving you home.
TONY: Probie...
MCGEE: Uh Ziva, actually you shouldn't probably drive him home tonight.
ZIVA: Why's that?
ABBY: Maybe he wants to live.
DUCKY: Yes, well however you get home, I suggest a couple of aspirin... yes, and perhaps some scotch.
GIBBS: I thought doctors weren't supposed to prescribe alcohol anymore, Duck.
DUCKY: Well, it always seems to work for you.
GIBBS: Did you get tickets to that gazelle thing again?
DUCKY: It's Giselle, Jethro. And no, that's not tonight. Marine Corps Birthday Ball. She didn't tell you?
(MUSIC OVER ACTION/SHEPARD WALKS DOWN THE STAIRS)
DUCKY: Our lovely Director has asked me to escort her.
TONY: All right, good night, Boss. All right, I'm good.(TONY STUMBLES)
ABBY: Hey Gibbs, happy birthday.
(MUSIC OVER ACTION)
GIBBS: I miss you guys. Semper fi.
(MUSIC UP AND OUT)
(ENDING CREDITS UP AND OUT)