03x07 - Girl Meets True Maya

♪ 48, 49, 50 ♪
♪ This is the song where I'm brushing my hair ♪
♪ What's that? ♪
♪ What's that? ♪
♪ Do the other side? Okay! ♪
♪ Maya's back ♪
♪ And she's Maya again ♪
♪ And that is why I have extra brushes now ♪
♪ And now they're gone! ♪

Okay, Rapunzel, I'm in a hurry to get to school.

What? Maya wouldn't say that.

I've been held back by your goody-moon-dust spell so long that I haven't done any real damage to this high school situation at all.

Okay, then let's discuss.

What kind of damage we talking about?


I will allow you just enough freedom No.

For one fun-sized Maya episode No.

That gets my blood pumping just a little bit.

No. Ain't gonna cut it.

Well, then I will allow one medium-sized Maya episode that allows me to go, "Heavens to Betsy, Maya. Will you never learn?"

Listen, Petunia, I've been living life on Candy Cane Lane the past year and I am a pent-up, boiling cauldron of I'm-gonna-do-somethin'.

I will allow you just enough freedom for one...


I run the show.

You don't allow me. I allow you.

You want the old Maya back?

Mama gonna do a big, bad thing.

Well, I don't believe that you will.

Because I only brought you back to exactly where I need you to be, and I was very careful not to go too far.




♪ Oh no! ♪
♪ Mama gonna do a big, bad thing! ♪

(Theme music playing)

♪ I've been waiting ♪
♪ For a day like this to come ♪
♪ Struck like lightning ♪
♪ My heart's beating like a drum ♪
♪ On the edge ♪
♪ Of something wonderful ♪
♪ Face-to-face with changes ♪
♪ What's it all about? ♪
♪ Life is crazy ♪
♪ But I know ♪
♪ I can work it out ♪
♪ 'Cause I got you ♪
♪ To live it with me ♪
♪ I feel all right, I'm gonna take on the world ♪
♪ Light up the stars, I've got some pages to turn ♪
♪ I'm singing "go-o-o" ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Take on the world, take on the world ♪
♪ Take on the world ♪
♪ Take on the world, take on the world ♪
♪ Take on the world ♪



You mean "Farkle"?

I mean "Lucas."


I want to see what you know.

Okay, here's what I know.


Why, thank you.

Pompeii was an ancient village in Italy located near the beauty and culture of Naples.

It was a resort town where the wealthy would go to soak up the sun.

It was like the Hawaii of Italy.

Thanks, Lucas.

Call on me any time.

Pompeii sounds so beautiful, Maya.

We should go there.

We should go there and be calm.

(Cory laughs)

Let me tell you about a whole city that became very calm very quick.

Now, who here knows about Mount Vesuvius?

Mount Vesuvius was a pent up, boiling cauldron of I-wanna-do-somethin'.

Vesuvius sat quiet for a long time, but then it did what volcanoes in time must do.

It 'sploded!

Why does a volcano have to 'splode?

Because if it doesn't, it'll just blow up worse later.

Vesuvius wiped out the entire population of Pompeii.

It was one of the greatest natural disasters the world had ever known.

Okay, then do it right now.

Do what you need to do to be Maya, but please don't wipe us all out, Peaches.

(Fire alarm ringing)

That's it!

Oh, a fire alarm!

Ooh, you sassy troublemaker!

Fire alarm, everybody!

Yes! Oh, my gosh!

This is bananas!

Your blood pumpin'?

Oh, it's so pumpin'!

Good. I didn't do it.

Yes, you did.

Okay, single file, everybody! Choo-choo!

Everybody find a safety buddy.

My safety buddy is Maya.

She exploded and now she's tired.

Um, I didn't do it.

Yes, you did!

But you can't do anything more for 3,000 years.

Man on PA: Hello, students. Sorry about that.

A little glitch in the system.

False alarm. Our mistake.

Back to work.

You didn't do it, Maya the Volcano?

No explodey.

Do you need a nappy?

Wide awakey.

Well, you're gonna wipe out the whole village, ain't ya?

And the neighboring towns.


Doy, slow down, honey. Breathe.

(Panting slows down)


What happened?

I am a bad Doy!

What do you mean?

I'm a bad Doy.

Did you hurt someone?

I'm not a monster.

Okay, of course not.

I ate candy.

Oh. Okay.

Well, it's just not that big of a deal.

I actually snuck some chocolate an hour ago.

Every day for a year!

I know.


We're back to you now.

Okay, yeah, that is a lot of candy.

Maybe you should cut back.

And I stoled it!

He didn't know, Mom.

He's been going into Klawicki's candy store, but he didn't know you had to pay for it.

I just didn't know.

Okay, you know, Doy, this is actually a good thing.

It means that you have a conscience.

What's that?

It means when you do something wrong, you feel bad.

How do I get rid of it?

You're stuck your whole life.

I'm gonna take you back to Mr. Klawicki's and you are going to tell him the truth and then you're gonna feel better because you did.


While we're there, we'll take some candy!

It's free!

Oh, Doy.


If you're going to explode, explode!

Just do it. I can't wait.



What are you doing?

(In bad British accent) Mount Farkleuvius has awoken in all its bubbling glory.

What is that?

That's my fancy British guy Mortimer.

Sounds like you're eating meatloaf.


Okay, thing #211 he can't do, accents.

Oh, but it's so charming when he can't do things.

He's a face! He's just a face! What's the matter with you?

Mount Farkleuvius sends two billion tons of burning lava straight into the air.


And right back down on his head.



Because you insulted Mortimer!

What's his last name?



Okay fine, I'll do it.


Maya, what's going on with you?

It's like I don't have a role here anymore.

Riley the Sweet, Farkle the Genius, Lucas the Good...

Ugh, I thought that was gone.

It's not gone. I'm gone.

I'm the one that's gone.

Maya, I've been down this road.

Forget it. I missed a whole year of school because I thought I had to be something.

That doesn't get you anywhere.

Yeah, and now you say "please" and "thank you," and what does that get you?

It gets me to like him.

Do you still like him?

I don't know what I like anymore.


No "whoa." No "whoa" while I'm figuring things out.


We're getting older.

These are gonna be more unpredictable.

I'm telling Smackle.

I'm telling Smackle!


I need to know who I am before I know what I like.

Hey, you know what's up with me?

The cash register is short $100.

So what's up with you?

That's great.

You know what's up with me? Who took my $100?

Just do it.

I didn't take the money.

Yes, you did!

Maya, you took the money!

She took the money, everybody!

Yeah! She's a cat burglar!

I didn't do it.

Yes, you did.

This is all over.

Well, if no one took my $100, then what happened?

Huh? Somebody just put two 50s under the whole drawer and forgot all about it?

Somebody just... did that.

Stay in school, kids.

I don't want my role with us to be someone you think takes money or sets off fire alarms.

You think you know what I'm capable of?

You have no idea what I'm capable of.

You guys want the Maya back, the Maya I really am?

You got her.

Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!

Way to go, Mom. They're gonna put Doy away.

This is ridiculous. He's a little kid!

Yeah, well, according to the candy store owner, this kid is public enemy number one.

What's your side of the story, counselor?

Well, he is a sweet and innocent child, the candy was sitting out in plain view, he always thought it was for him.


Are you sweet and innocent, kid?

All right, Dewey.



This kid is going awaaay!

My friend is sensitive about his name.

He likes to be called Doy.


Well, Doy has been taking candy for a long time now.

You want some?

That's evidence, kid.

You just can't go around eating... Okay, give me some.


Doy's been stealing candy every day for a year.

And the cars!

Mr. Klawicki just wants to be reimbursed.

He wants $300.

I got six rocks and a turtle.

Don't take my turtle!

You're gonna have to work it off.

Dance, Doy! Dance!

Nice moves, kid. (Chuckles)

Look, we're gonna talk to his parents.

They'll pay the money.


In the meantime, Doy will stay out of the candy store for a while.

Are we good?

We're good.


This is my neighborhood. I will enforce the law.

I know.

You've got a tough job. We thank you.

You're very welcome.

Say, kid, wanna take a ride in a real police car?

Yeah! Want some more evidence?


Sometimes, the system works.

If you choose to live next door to a volcano, why should you be surprised by the destruction that comes with it?

Because they lived next to it so long.

Maybe they forgot what it was.

Because it's not.


'Cause you've always lived right next to it and you have faith that it would never do anything bad to you.

Where is she?

She's cutting school?

That's what she decided to do.

Our question for discussion is: There's a whole world out there, Pompeii, why live next to a volcano then? Huh?


The soil from volcanoes grows the most beautiful flowers.

And deep down, Maya is beautiful.

Okay, calm down.

You live in Ireland.

You learn that there's over 300 days of rain a year.

On the other hand, it's one of the most beautiful, green places on Earth.

And places, like people, offer wonderful peaks and valleys.

Now, what makes these wonderful peaks and valleys?



It's up to you to understand what you've chosen to live with.

Learn from Pompeii.

As you live next to each other, understand that every once in a while, things explode.

That's nature.

And that's human nature.


(Door opens)



It's you, isn't it?

It's me. Carla?

It's been a while. Nice jacket.

Oh, thanks.

Give it to me.

Oh, man, I'm just messing with you, Hart.

(Maya chuckles)

Messin' with you!

You know, I just came back to visit a little.

It's, uh, almost dark.

It's a little scary here after dark.

I appreciate that, thanks.

Looks like she's prepared for it though.

Where's that little friend of yours?




You two are like those stuck-together twins.

There's a word for that. What's that called?

Sesame twins.

You see what you left me here with?

Dorothy kid's stupid.

Well, her name's Riley.

She's all, "I'm Dorothy. I got a perfect life.

I'm Little Miss Perfect Life."

You sound jealous.

I'm not jealous of anything.

I just want what she has.

(Both chuckle)

Miss you around here, man.

What's with the brick and the hammer?

You gonna build a house?

She's Maya Hart.

She's gonna burn the joint down.

Nah, look at her.

She's changed.

She's soft like Dorothy.

Now, I'm gonna need you to start calling her Riley.

You're soft like Riley.

How's that?

I'm not soft.

Yeah, you are a little bit.

That's okay.

Can always fix that.

And you know how you fix things?

With a hammer.


Got a lot of equipment here, Hart.

Could do a lot of damage with that.

Is that what you come here for?

See what you're still capable of?


Yeah, I came here to see what I'm still capable of.


Because I'd love to have you back here instead of Renee.

Yeah, instead of Renee.

Now, this is what a hammer is capable of.

Okay, slugger, let's give someone else a chance.

Show us what you got... softy.

You're weak, Hart.

I know it.

You know it.

You're not one of us.

I'm one of us.

You'd love to have me back here now, wouldn't you, Carla?

(Dryly) Yeah, Renee. Come back.

Because Hart's showed us what she's got.


You chose the wrong group of friends.

You chose her, and she made you weak.

So, why don't you just say she made you weak and go home?

Maya: No.

Because I'm not weak.

Oh yeah? Prove it.

Take this hammer from me and prove it.

Or I'm gonna knock Little Miss Perfect's head right off in front of you 'cause I don't see anyone here who can stop me.

Yeah, there is.

'Cause I've got the brick and I've got the hammer.

Good for you, Hart.

You know what you're gonna do with those?

I know exactly what I'm gonna do with those.

I know exactly who I am.

Where is she?

It's my fault. I'm not there to stop her.

It's not your fault. You're her best friend.

I only wanted her to find herself.

Not for her to explode.

We don't know that she exploded.

We don't know what she did.

(Knock on door)

You can't be with her all the time, Riley.

The job of being somebody's best friend is to make sure that even when you're not with them, you're still there.

(Door opens)

You have failed.

Baby girl, what did you do?

New York code 145.






You did this.

Put me in jail for the rest of my life and don't allow visitors or else she'll come and bring me a stupid lemon meringue pie!

It's for you and all your jailbird friends.

Your the girl whose head she put back on.


She's my best friend and she ruined me!

Well, she's my best friend and I love her.

We couldn't find her.

Looks like somebody found her.

Maya, what did you do?

She did a number on a public park.

A park on my beat.

My park.

I watch that park every day.

I'm sorry.

You all care about this girl?

We do.

Well, we're gonna take a little field trip.

I'm gonna show you all just want this girl did to my park.

Let's go.

You did this.


Maya, I wasn't even with you.

Yeah, you were.

I had a brick in my hand.


Because somebody went after you.

Who, Maya?

These two girls I used to know.

I could have been them.

Riley, I would have been them.

But I'm not.

Because they think a hammer and a brick makes you strong.

And as much as I wanted to throw a brick through a window, I know that if I did that, that's what would make me weak.

I'm strong... because there's something inside me that stops me now.

It knows how important you've been in my life and it'll never let me do any real damage as long as I live.

That part inside me...

I'm gonna call it Dorothy.

Call it whatever you want.

I'm just glad that you didn't do anything bad.


How come I ain't bad, Matthews?

The friends we choose can have the most profound influence in our entire lives, one way or the other.

This way.

I'm proud of you, Maya.

What happened to the girls?

Oh, well, I might have had a brick and a hammer, and I might have swung them over my head a little bit and ran, like, right towards 'em like I was...


So, you're Maya again?

Well, they seem to think so.

They ran away so fast.

My park.

I watch this park every day.

I'm sorry.

You know, I'm not gonna give up on that Carla and Renee.

And I don't want you to be like them, okay?

I can't.

Dorothy won't let me.

New York code 145.


I'm gonna write this one up.

Then I'm gonna put it into a folder.

Then I'm gonna misplace the folder.

And if I never hear from you two little hoodlums ever again, that folder remains misplaced.

I'm a hoodlum.

Why are you giving me a break?

My park.

I look at this park every day.

I have hope for this park, too.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Hey, sometimes the system works.

Thanks for putting my head back on.


You, too.



Before I knew you...

You always knew me.

When I was real young, I used to come to this park and look at this statue and wonder if I would ever have friends as good as these.

That would hold hands with each other and smile.

I used to wonder what it was they were so happy about.

Now I know.