01x13 - Three Sentences

Previously on This Is Us...

I've decided to have gastric bypass surgery.

Uh, I'm gonna do it.

Do what?

The surgery. I just don't want you to freak out, okay?

Don't worry about me freaking out.

Uh, well, I do have to worry about it, Kate, because the thing is, is that I'm kind of in love with you.

I'd marry the hell out of you, Kate Pearson.

Yeah, I'm gonna continue to date Sloane because she's kind, and she's sweet, she's funny.

And-and, you know what? Sometimes you just got to do the right thing, even if it's not what you want.

This cancer is coming for me sooner than later.

I can feel it.

The medication isn't working anymore.

Do you want to stop the chemo, Will?

(singer vocalizing)

(movie projector clicking)



(indistinct talking)

Perfect. Yes!

Jack: Oh!

Rebecca: (clapping) Good job.

Oh, is that what we're doing now?

♪ And maybe I won't, what if I do ♪
♪ And what if she don't? ♪

(Rebecca screams)

Kids: We love cake!

We love cake! We love cake!

One, two, three!


♪ Say good-bye ♪

Jack: Eyes closed. Eyes closed.

Rebecca: Smile.

(all yell)

Jack: That's it, putting this camera down.



(indistinct yelling)

He's in, he's in, he's in.

I'm going deep.

Oh, no.

(crickets chirping)

Baby, I can't do it.

Oh, come on.

Kids are turning ten tomorrow, right?

They don't need more toys, but a dog.

Baby, our beautiful children need a beautiful dog.


Get them a dog.


And then get them a new mommy who will walk it.

That's fair enough, but, um... do you, uh, do you want to interview these women, or do you trust my judgment?


Oh, you're lucky you're cute.

But am I cute enough to get lucky?

I don't know, are you?

Kevin: Guys, we need to have a meeting.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

What happened to knocking, huh?

And since when do you call meetings?

Yeah, last I checked, we... we call the meetings.


You attend the meetings, and then we continue to feed you.

That's-That's the deal. What's up?

We want our own birthday parties this year.



But you guys love sharing a birthday party.

You get the... the three layer cake, and the birthday banner, and pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey.

The... donkey.

Mom, we're gonna be ten, we're too old for donkeys and banners.

I want a Madonna party.

Sophie and I love Madonna.

You do?

Hold on a second, who's Sophie?

My best friend.

What happened to Grace?

We drifted.

I want a Princess Bride party.

Princess Bride? (chuckles)

You want what?

Kevin, seriously, you were terrified by that movie.

That's when I was nine.

Now that I'm gonna be ten, I love it.

Okay. Hey, Randall!

Come in here, son.

Randall: What's going on?

Are we all getting checked for lice again?

Rebecca: No. (sighs)

Baby, do you want your own birthday party, too?

Meh Rebecca: Kevin!



Uh, maybe we could invite some of your friends from school.

That's okay. They have a rule that if you have a party, you have to invite the whole class. It's too many kids.

The whole class?

So we do the whole class.

The whole class!

Can I have a magician?

Uh... yeah.


Okay, I'm in.

Okay, so...

Meeting's over. Thank you, everybody.

Thanks for stopping by!

I know, "shut the door".

(door closes)

What just happened?


So, let's talk dates for your gastric bypass.


Does the first week of February work for you?

Yeah, or... never at all.

Either one of those sound good to me.

Kate... what's going on?

I got engaged.


Thank you.

But my fiancé... sorry, that's just crazy to say.


I have a fiancé. I feel so French.

Your fiancé...

Uh... he just had heart surgery.

And it was terrifying.

And the thought of either one of us having surgery, it...

Wait, am I insane for wanting to bail? I don't know.

Oh. I-I just don't think it's the right time for surgery.

At least not now.

But... (sighs) Damn.

I was excited to lose some serious weight, and quick.

Kate... have you ever considered an immersive weight loss experience?

A fat camp?

There is a incredible facility upstate, in the Adirondacks.

It's a month-long program.

No distractions, no temptations.

Total focus and a lot of hard work.

I'm late. I'm late. Juice?





And how about some yogurt real quick?

Can't, Tyler wants to see me first thing.

About what?


What's cookin', good lookins?


Oh, you know.


Ah, Wednesday, the meat in the Tuesday-Thursday sandwich, and what a sweet, sweet meat sandwich it is.

You okay, William?

Okay? Am I okay?

Mm, yeah, that's the question on the table.

"Okay" does not do justice to how I feel.

I feel better than I've felt in months.


I feel like s*x, I feel like magic, (slurps)

I feel like music, which reminds me, Tess lent me her iPad.

IPod. That's an iPod.

You say "pod," I say "pad."

Let's call the whole thing off. (laughs)

Can you show me how to put my music in this?

I've really got to run.

Thanks, son. I'll go get my list.


♪ ♪



Chemo boost.

Happened to my dad when he stopped his treatment.

His energy's not being zapped anymore.

Well, good, I guess.

Hey, can you help him with his music?

I got to run.


But how about having a little yogurt...

No time for yogurt, baby. No time for yogurt. Love you.

I got a hot minute for some yogurt.

Hey, you.

Have a good weekend? Yeah?


Good to hear. Mine was all right. I, um, saw a movie...


With, uh...


What's "no"?

No small talk.

No pretending like things are good with us.

You said that dating me was the right thing to do.

You basically called me the girl equivalent of wearing a seat belt in a cab.

Okay, listen, I understand...

No, okay, we work together. That's it.

Let's come in, rehearse the play, get out.




Still really, you know, feel like you would've loved my movie recommendation, so...

Your loss.

Toby: Did you remember to write your name in all of your underwear?

(giggles) It's not that kind of camp.

Oh, okay.


Are you sure that you're okay with me doing this?

I know this isn't the best timing for us.

Of course I am okay with it.

Kate, we have the rest of our lives to spend together.

Or at least the rest of mine, I had a heart attack at 40, so I'm going first, obvi.


Look, this is an incredible opportunity, and I want you to do it for yourself.

And Dr. Singh doesn't want me travelling for at least another two weeks so I will just get to know the Big Apple a little bit.

Do you know anyone in the city?

Not a soul.

But I will be fine.

If Macaulay Culkin can do it, so can I.


I love you.

I love you, too.

(sighs) This is gonna be so awesome.


I bet it's gonna be so hardcore.


I'm gonna puke so much.


But I'm not gonna be one of those people who complains.


I'm just gonna... puke.

Yeah, that's the-that's the right attitude.

Yeah, and I'm gonna have a skinny bitch trainer Uh-huh.

Who's gonna scream at me until I cry a pool full of tears.


And then I'm gonna swim a hundred laps in that pool.

(laughing): Yeah!

That's disgusting, but yeah.


Thank you for being so supportive.

That's what fiancé's do.

Well, thank you, fiancé.

Oh, you're welcome, fiancée.

Let's stop doing that.

Okay, yeah, it was enough.

Yeah, that was disgusting.


Hey, sorry I'm late.

Family's a little nuts right now.

You wanted to see me?

Yeah, yeah, come in, come in.

Randall, do you know Sanjay Jahiri?

Only by reputation.

Randall Pearson.

Um, sorry, I biked in from Brooklyn.

Apologies if I'm a little sweaty.

That's all good in the hood.

Tyler: So, did Sarah tell you about our potential new wind farm client?

In pre-construction, in Alberta, yeah.


Which is a city in the province of Alberta.

Sorry. Was just specifying.

Appreciate that, Sanjay, I know the specifics.

Tyler: Sanjay's gonna come aboard help us land them.


I-I was hoping to throw my hat in the ring for that account.

Oh, well, given Sanjay's background in, uh, renewable energy...

I've got interest in renewable, too.

Uh, I at least deserve a shot at this.


Fair enough.

Why don't you both work on a derivative.

Get it to me by the end of the week.

End of the week? I can probably have something to you by tomorrow morning.

Sanjay, sound good?

No problem here.

Tyler: May the best derivative win.

God, what we do would be a terrible reality show.


Rebecca (on TV): ♪ Spin, spin, spin, spin, spin ♪

And turn, and turn...

Rebecca: Perfect.

Thank you so much, see you tomorrow.

Buh-bye. Ah.

Magician's confirmed.


How are the Madonna gloves coming along?

Eh... good... good.


Where'd you find this?

Pulled it up from the basement.

God, wasn't Randall so cute?

He's still cute.

Yeah, he's fine. He was cuter when he was five.

Jack: Close, close.

Rebecca: Close, close, close.

I can't believe we're not gonna play pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey this year.

And we're probably never gonna play it again, huh?


Hey, Jack?


I think this whole thing is really sweet, but in less than 12 hours we're gonna have 45 kids here for three different birthday parties, so maybe a little less reminiscing...

... a little bit more bedazzling?


Thank you.

Kate: Eyes closed.

Rebecca: Eyes closed.

Eyes closed.

Hey, Bec?


What if we had another kid?

Rebecca: Okay, do you want to try?

Good job, hon.

Keep your eyes closed, remember. No peeking!

♪ ♪

Jack, we can barely take care of the three children we do have.

Yeah, but they're not gonna be kids much longer.

I mean, they're ten. That's halfway to adulthood.

Just barely.

And do you remember what happened the last time we tried to have a kid?


We came home with three!

Randall's voice, at a certain point, is gonna drop.

And then Kevin's gonna... get one of those weird, wispy mustaches.

And Kate... Kate's gonna get womanly.

And they're not gonna need us anymore, but, you know, with kids...

Jack... (chuckles) you are the love of my life.


And our kids are... my everything.

(sighs) And?

That's it.


I'm done having kids.

12 hours.

45 kids.


Got it.

What about a dog?



Mr. Pearson?


Your father's here to see you.



Thought I'd stop up, see where you worked.

Man, I haven't been this high since the '90s.


How'd you get here?

I took the bus. Look at all this.

Fit for a king.

"But what are kings, when regiment is gone, but perfect shadows in a sunshine day?"

Christopher Marlowe.


Hey, you get a lunch break?

I was thinking I might like to hit the town, accessorize the ol' wardrobe.


Yeah, I got to step my look up if I'm gonna meet my maker.

I thought you might come with me.

Oh, wow. I'd love to.

I really would, but, uh, I'm working through lunch today.


Hey, can't Jessie go with you?

I can't trust his opinion.

He thinks I look good in everything.

Look, I don't mean to bother, but it's such a nice day out.

I don't know how many of those I got left.

Can't argue with that.

No, you really cannot.

Well, all right.

Have a nice lunch.

It's not a full lunch, buddy.

Just grabbing a quick bite.

Woman: Up ahead is the annex.

That's where we have yoga, drumming classes, cooking classes, mindful eating workshops.

And over here, is the horse's stable.

So, where's the gym?

Did, like, did I miss it or... ?

Oh, no, we have one, of course.

It's just not the primary focus of our campus.

Oh. I was thinking I was gonna spend most of my time there.

You know, pick a treadmill and, like, really go to town on it.

Yeah, well, we aren't your typical weight loss program, Kate.

We aren't trying to provide a quick cosmetic fix.

We're focusing on the deeper work...

Tackling the issues that lie beneath the weight.

Oh, well, that's easy.

'Cause beneath the weight, there is more weight.

(phone buzzing)


We encourage guests to disconnect as much as possible.

Oh, I'm sorry, it's a family emergency.

Hey, Kev. What's your emergency?

How'd you know?

Wait, are you actually having one?

I can feel Sloane's wrath.

It actually has heat on it.

Her wrath is making me sweat.

This is not the first time a girl has been mad at you.

She's more than mad, trust me.

Anyway, how's camp?

I'm not sure. It feels like a cult.

Or Whole Foods.

I don't know. Hey, can you call Toby? He doesn't know anyone here, and it would just be nice if you could hang out with him.

Are you serious?

I can't believe this, I call to get help, I got to end up doing something nice?

I'll text you his number.

Love you. Got to go. Bye.




I have a boyfriend.

Well, actually, fiancé.

Oh. Well... we'll see.

Jack: Let's go, out of the kitchen.

Hey, fellas, no touching the cake till the candles are on it, all right?

Kevin: My name is Inigo Montoya!

Slow down...

You killed my father!


Prepare to die!

Babe, popcorn?

Kevin, off the table, please.

Off the table.

Jack: Kevin, hey.

Listen to your mother, all right?

I know it's your birthday, but... Hey, wow!

You guys look so great!

(gasps) Oh, my God, it's Madonna!

(girls giggle)

Wow, Madonna!

Have you seen my daughter, Kate?

This is actually... this is her birthday party.

And I know she would love to meet you.


(gasps) Kate!

How did I not recognize you?

Why didn't somebody tell me that is was Kate?

She looks like Madonna! Wow.

You look so great.

Thanks, Dad.

Sophie's here!

Hey, Kate. Happy birthday.

I like your gloves.

Ah, they're okay. Come on.

Hey, I stayed up all night bedazzling those, kiddo.

My God, what is happening to my life?

Rebecca: Jack?


I need you outside.

(scoffs) Where is everyone?

I don't know. It's just Yvette's boys and one kid from his school.

Jack: Didn't we invite the entire class?


Okay, let's go find out what's going on.

Hey, Randall, come here a sec.



Where are all the other kids from your school?


Oh, they're probably not gonna come.

Why? Did you forget to hand out the invitations?

No. I handed them out.

It's just that they're not my friends.

Come on, man, that's not true.

Yeah, you get invited to all of their birthday parties.

Because of the rule.

They wouldn't invite me if it wasn't for the rule.

Well, bud, why... why didn't you tell us that nobody was gonna show up?

I didn't want you to be upset.

Why would we be upset?

Do we look upset?

Come on. (chuckles)


A little bit.


We're not upset at all.

How can they not like Randall?

I don't know, he's the best.

He's so sweet and smart and he's funny.

Like, actually funny.

I know!

Not just little kid funny.


Is it because he's black?

Come on.

Those racist bastards.

Right? Jack, don't... don't get emotional.

I'm not emotional.

I'm not emotional, you're emotional.

I'm not emotional.


Well, we got to get it together.

Why don't we poach kids from one of the other two parties and send them out to Randall's?

Okay, great, we take three from there, that'll double his party.



Okay, let's go steal some kids.

Oh man, I never spent a whole day with a famous person before.

I went to a dinner party once with the guy who came in eighth on Carrie Underwood's season of Idol, but obviously, you're way better than that.

Well, thank you, Toby. I appreciate that.

Malia, how are you? Good to see you.

Oh, he knows the rope girl by name. Of course he does.

Hello, Malia.

Please give my regards to Sasha.

It's an Obama joke.

(whistles) Toby?


Come on.

All right.

Here we go.

(chuckles) This place is incredible.

You see those two women?

They look like Westworld hosts.

Kevin: Not interested.

Whatever conversation I'd have with those girls, I guarantee you, Toby, I've had it a billion times before.

It goes like this: "You watch The Manny? Really?"

"Yes, the baby is cute in real life."

"You want to get into acting, too?"

"Well, that's phenomenal."

Margarita, Tequila Soda, Tequila Rocks, tequila shot, hotel, s*x, room service, shower, s*x, Uber. It's...

It's hard to believe we're even the same species.

Olivia, right, w-was exciting, you know, a-and... and dark and sexy and the whole thing was just... it was...

(chuckles) it was intoxicating.

And t-then Sloane, Sloane was... she was great in her own way.

She was just adorable, you know?

A-And intelligent and interesting, and so I... I chose Sloane.

But now... now I'm wondering if I should have chosen Olivia.

And I...

All right, well, we don't have to stand around and get drunk and flirt with supermodels.

We could just... talk, if you like. (sighs)

(in deep voice) About your feelings.



How do you not like magic?

Fezzik (on video): Anybody want a peanut?

Uh, hey. Excuse me.

Hey, bud, do you like magic?

'Cause I hear there's an awesome magician outside in the backyard.

I'm good.

You're good?

You sure?

Hey, babe.

Come on over here a second.



You know what doesn't say "I'm good"?


A baby.



(gasps) There's the birthday boy!

How's everything going outside? Are you having fun?

Yep. Just going to the bathroom.

Bud, I'm sorry more people didn't come to your birthday party.

I bet they wanted to come, but they probably had other things going on that they couldn't get out of.

No, they didn't. They're just not my friends.

But I don't care.

I have three really good friends.

That's a lot. And they all came to my party.


Are you still liking your new school?

'Cause I feel like you're always telling Dad and I how much you love it and how much fun you're having.

Oh, yeah, my teachers are awesome.

And at lunch, I hang out with Andrew.

We're making a book of mazes.

You are? That's awesome.

(smacks lips) Randall, you are the coolest kid I know.

Thanks. Can I go pee now?

Yeah, go pee.

(chuckles softly)

♪ ♪
♪ Testify ♪

How you doin'?

What's going on?

♪ That's for real ♪

Nope. (chuckles)

♪ I ain't got no drama ♪

These are an eight, I'm shooting for a ten.

Okay, okay.

I'd take another look at that last pair.

They felt mighty ten-ish.

Here they are.


♪ Baby's been good to me... ♪


What do you think?

I think you got the perfect head shape for sunglasses.

I also think I need to get back.

One more stop.

I need an egg cream.

What's that now?

It's a soda with milk in it.

Fox's chocolate syrup.

It's got to have Fox's chocolate syrup.

I'll take these.

(kids chattering happily)


Hmm? Okay what?

Okay... to having a conversation about it.

What, seriously?

Jack, I just talked to Randall and he is amazing.

And I know that we can't take credit for his genes, but we raised him.

We did that.


And he's this... incredible little person.

So maybe it wouldn't be so bad to shape... another little incredible person.


Yep. Chips. Okay.

Yeah, let's go get chips.

Imagine you are a tree with roots growing deeper...

If a distraction emerges, just acknowledge it and return to your stillness.

Growing deeper and deeper into...


(birds chirping)


(drums beating, drumsticks clacking)

Just starting off nice and slow.

Just like that, getting the bodies moving.

There we go.

And down, swing.

I'm good.

Instructor: No, it's all right. We're all sweating together.

Hey, Tobe, it's me.

Uh, these people are insane, and I am seriously gonna need you to come and get me right n...

What is wrong with you?

Your voice is annoying my horses.

Well, your horses can deal.

Yeah, well, I can't.

Your voice is annoying me, too.

No, no, no. Hold on.

Okay, um, I am not gonna be insulted by the fat camp horse guy today... I'm just not.

I need to get the hell up out of this place.

Good for you.

This place is... pointless.

I didn't say that.

It's a total waste of money.

So we're fat. I'm fat, you're fat.

So what? What difference does it make?

It's cells. We just have more of 'em.

Actually, it's more than that...

People come here, lose a few pounds, learn how to roast some Brussels sprouts.

And then they go home thinking they're transformed.

But deep down... they're the same.

It's a joke.

People trying to change their lives is not a joke.

People don't change.

You know it and I know it.

That's why you're quitting.

En garde! (acting along with scene playing in The Princess Bride on TV)

My name is Inigo Montoya!

You killed my father!

Prepare to die.


Rebecca: Inigo.

(TV playing)


Dad, my hair's cool, right? It's doing the thing?

It's doing the thing.

Rebecca: Why are all of the Madonnas in here?

Where's your sister?

I don't know.


I'm on it, I got it.

Madonna (singing on stereo): ♪ I'm gonna lose my mind ♪
♪ You just keep on pushing my love... ♪

Hi, baby.


Why aren't you with all your friends at Kevin's party?

No one wanted to learn how to Vogue.

What? Why not?

They all like Kevin more than me.

Everyone does.

Come on, no, that's not true.

Yes, it is.

No, it's not true.

Yes, it is.


You think I like Kevin more than I like you?

Honestly, I can barely stand the guy.

Ha, ha.

Hey, you know what I think?

I think that your Madonna party is just too cool for most ten-year-olds.

But it makes me want to Vogue.

But I-I don't know how to Vogue.

Can you show me?

Come on, help your dad out. Show me how to Vogue.

I-I know you can teach me how to Vogue.


Okay, how do I do it?

Make L's with your hands.

Like this? Okay.


Oh, this side.

Both, both sides.

Both sides. We keep switching?


Are we Vogue-ing? (gasps)

We're Vogue-ing?!

Wow! I had no idea it was this much fun to Vogue.


Do we sit, or do we stand up?

Here, let's stand up. Let's try standing up.

And we Vogue.



Strike a pose!

Strike a pose.

Awesome. Hey, Kate. Strike a pose.

Hey, you know what, let's crank this up.


Yeah, baby?

♪ Borderline... ♪

I just kinda want to be alone right now.

♪ Like I'm going to lose my mind ♪




Well, you just come join the other party when you're ready, okay?

♪ Borderline ♪

Whenever you're ready.


We'll be over here.

Thanks, Dad.


♪ Over the borderline ♪

Let me... Let me see if I got this.

You had two amazing women,... and you let them both go?


I already know that much, thank you.

Well, lucky for you, I am the king of romantic grand gestures.

You really kind of are.

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

See, while you were out seducing women with your master race bone structure and your perfect man-bod, I was logging two solid decades of actually doing nice things for women so that they fall for me.

And on top of that...

And I'm not exaggerating here...

I have seen every romantic comedy ever made.

So... you just need to pick a girl, and I'm gonna help you win her back.

Okay, I...

I pick, um...


I mean, they're both great. I-I...

Okay, okay, Kevin, Kevin, Kevin, look at me.

A romantic gesture of this magnitude is only effective if it is directed at the love of your life.

All right, the end of Notting Hill completely falls apart if Hugh Grant thinks that Julia Roberts is just kinda a'ight.

All right? Then he's just kind of annoying her at a press conference, right?

I've never seen that movie.

Shut up. What?



Alright, Kevin, close your eyes.

What are you gonna do?

Close your eyes.

All right, now, I want you to picture the love of your life.

Imagine that you have 30 seconds to win her back.

One shot, three sentences.

What are those sentences, and who are you saying them to?

There it is.

I got it.

I got... All right.

We're doing this.


Toby, you're a stud. You know that?

That's what I've been trying...

Oh, we're moving? Okay. I'm getting the car.

Say, uh... Hey, William, I have a question.

The only bad question is a question...

Yep, got it. That's why I'm asking.

Uh, we just went to three different diners looking for your perfect egg cream.

One had Hershey's syrup instead of Fox's.

The other one didn't have any to-go cups.

Sounds like a recap, not a question.

My question is why, after we finally found your perfect egg cream that passed your egg cream litmus test, why, William... why are you not drinking it?

It's not the right time yet.

Oh, okay, no problem. Then I got plenty of time.

Nothing career-defining going on at work...

Can we pull over right here?

Right here?

Pull into this parking lot.


Sure, that's...


Okay. Now what?

I was hoping to drive your car.

You want to...

Drive your car. Yes.


(chuckling): All right, cool.

You got it?


Whenever you're ready.

Could you plug this in to something and push play?


(mid-tempo jazz playing)

Hmm. (chuckles)

Uh, what's happening?

When I was a little boy in Memphis, there was this record shop, Hoppy's.

I hear they tore it down a couple of years ago.

When I was a kid, that was the place.

They'd let you listen to any record, even if you wasn't gonna buy it.

One of the owners... Mo Moretti was his name...

He could look at you and tell what song you needed to hear.

Every Saturday morning, we would wait for Mo to open up shop.

He'd drive up in his all-black Cadillac Series '62, tunes flowing out the windows, cool shades, drinking a grape soda.


I always wanted to be like Mo.

Even if just for a minute.

Driving around in a cool car, drinking my favorite drink, listening to my favorite record.

Something I always wanted to do before I die.

♪ ♪

Then you will.

Well, the thing is, son, I don't know how to drive.

What's that, now?

I never got my license. Never needed to.

Lived in cities most of my life, and never could really afford a car when I didn't.

It's embarrassing to have to admit, at my age, I don't know how to drive.

♪ ♪

You want me to show you how?

I was hoping you would.

Yes, that would mean a lot to me.

All right, then.

(chuckles): All right.

You know anything at all?

Just the basics.


You good in that mirror over on the left?


Rearview mirror?

Rearview's good.

Mirror on the right?

Mirror's good.

Instructor: Welcome. Join us.

(rhythmic drumming)

Here we go, guys. Find the rhythm.

There it is.

Find that rhythm, guys.

What's causing you to move? Huh?

Why are you here?

Is it guilt?

Is it rage?

Is it sadness? Is it fear?

Maybe it's loneliness.

Whatever it is, I want it to flow through your hands and I want you to let it out.

All right? Let it all out.

Pound it!

Here we go!

Let it out!

One more time! Let's go!

Here we go!

Rebecca: Randall!

Pound it!


Strike a pose!

Strike a pose.

Awesome. Hey, Kate.

Strike a pose.

♪ Oh ♪
♪ Oh ♪
♪ Oh ♪

Here we go!


(continues screaming)

You all right?

(drumming continues)

Kevin: Alright.

Thank you.

Toby: Go with God.


(knocking on door)




Before you say anything, there's three sentences I need to say to you, okay?


I was head-over-heels in love with you the moment that I saw you.

I never should've let you get away.

And, uh...

It's like, you were part of me, you know, like you were my arm, and when I lost you, it's like, I... lost my arm.

Dot, dot, dot.

It's like I've been walking around without an arm for over a decade, you know, and, uh... comma, I really want my arm back.

You know, 'cause I never stopped thinking about it, comma, not... ever.

Parentheses, you look amazing.

By the way.

End parentheses.


You gonna say anything, at all?



My ex-husband who I haven't seen in 12 years just shows up at my doorstep unannounced.

You know, I'm not exactly sure what you want me to say.

Okay. Um...

Say, um...

S... Say I can come in.

I can't say that.


Can you say you'll think about... meeting up with me?

Maybe we can have a conversation, just... I want to talk to you.


(scoffs) You always have to go big, don't you, Pearson?

For you, Sophie... always.

(TV playing indistinctly)


Hey. Come here.


Sophie is Kate's best friend and she's spending the whole party with you.

So don't you think that maybe... you should suggest to her that she should go play with your sister for a little while?

I can't, Dad.

I love her.

Jack: Wow.

So this whole party was for Sophie.

I guess.



He loves her.

Oh, boy.

(on TV): As you wish.

(horse whinnies)

You're still here.

I know what you were doing before, with the whole grabbing my phone and being a dick thing.

You were being hard on me so I would push myself.

And I think I do I need to deal with the stuff that I've been avoiding.

You know, see what's behind the weight.

So... thanks.

For being a dick.

I needed it.

Like I said, your voice was annoying my horses.

That's why I grabbed it.

And I wasn't being a dick.

I am a dick.


That said...

... I'm glad you're staying.

You see, 'cause I happen to think that you are as sexy as hell.

And I'm in cabin 13.

When you're ready.

No, thanks.

No, you don't see...

See, you don't see it yet.

But this?

This is happening.

Oh, but it's not.

Oh, but it is.

N-no, it's not.



I can't move.

I have to wash my face but I cannot move.

Will you wash my face for me?

Oh, I can't. I'm dead.

Three parties killed me.

Hey, Bec?


The talks don't work anymore.

I couldn't make Kate feel better.

And that's like... my thing.

You know?

I tried, but it just... it didn't stick.


We can't have another kid right now.


I think the three of them are only gonna get more difficult.




I miss when Kevin used to call hiccups "hee-bots."


Remember that?

Yeah. Yeah.


I miss when you used to look in the rearview mirror and they'd all be asleep in their car seats, just mouths wide open. Ah.

I miss when all of their outfits used to match.



(grunts, sighs)

Hey, maybe we could at least...

No. We're not getting a dog.

No? Okay.

(kids clamoring)

Kevin: Eat this, Randall!

(grunting, growling)

(sighing): Oh. Thank God.


(whispers): Surprise attack.

Surprise attack!

(shouting, screaming)



No, no, no!

Oh, I got you!

I got a shield, I got a human shield!

Help me!

I have a human shield!

Oh, no, no! Whoa!

It's all you, Will Hill.

Oh, I think I'm getting the hang of this, Randall.

You got this.

Yeah. You've been driving for a good... 15 minutes, now.

(Randall laughs)

Ah, this is a dream come true, right here.

Thank you so much, Randall.

It's my pleasure.


Watch me do this.

Let's see.

Randall: Oh, I could take a nap, now!

William: Hey! Man...


William: Did I scare you a little bit there, son?

(Randall laughs)

William: Man, chill out!

♪ Oh, oh ♪

Jack: Whoa!

(Rebecca shrieks)

Jack: Go, go, go, go, go, go!

Jack: Oh, you're in trouble now!

♪ Oh ♪

Kevin: Do you happen to know if you have six fingers on your right hand?


Do you have six fingers on your right hand?



One, two, three.

♪ ♪


Okay. No peeking.

Jack: Oh!

Kids: Happy birthday, Daddy!

♪ ♪