03x03 - It Hurts Me Too

[bunniefuu]

Scene 1: Sookie's house - Sookie, Eric, biker

Sookie sh**t on the wolf but Eric receives the ball.

Sookie: Eric!

Wolf in his head: Holy sh*t. V.

Eric: Stay back, Sookie. Don't sh**t him. He knows.

Sookie: He knows what?

Eric: Who do you work for?

Biker: Give me a taste, fucker. Come on.

Eric: Who sent you?

Biker: I-I can't--I can't talk.

Eric: For the last time: Who is your master?

Biker in his head: Think you can mad-dog me, you f*cking fanger? You got nothing on Jackson.

Biker: If I tell you, I'm as dead as you are. You might as well k*ll me now.

Eric: As you wish. (To Sookie) Oh. I got your rug all wet. Heh.

Scene 2: Russell's house - Russell, Talbot, Lorena, Bill

Russell: Oh, Lorena, Lorena. Oh, dear. I'm so sorry.

Lorena: I'm fine.

Russell: Come here.

Lorena: I'll heal in a minute.

Talbot: The Celtic tapestry was a gift from the lord of Glyndyfrdwy in 1387.

Russell: We'll find a way to clean it up.

Talbot: Hm.

Russell: Or we'll put a planter or two in front of it and we'll hide the burn marks. Really, it's like Armageddon in here anytime someone chips a dessert glass. Okay, now if everyone could please leave me alone with Mr. Compton. We could all use a moment to let, um, cooler heads prevail.

They all leave.

Russell: This may be difficult for a Louisianan to understand, but in the kingdom of Mississippi, our appetite for unprovoked v*olence is nil. Fangs. You know, it was Miss Krasiki who recommended you. If we are to be working together, I suggest you learn to get along.

Bill: You do Lorena's bidding now?

Russell: Oh, that's what she thinks. But given your privileged standing with Queen Sophie Anne I'd rather have you for my own.

Bill: Whatever lies Lorena has told you, she has motives of her own.

Russell: I am well aware. She really is quite unsophisticated for someone so old. Do you know that she wanted me to make you watch while she k*lled your human? And speaking of, vampire to vampire... how much do you really love that human of yours? Why not turn her, as I turned Talbot centuries ago? Spend eternity together. Mm. That's a commitment.

Bill: That is impossible.

Russell: Well, the alternative is to subject her to the vicissitudes of mortality and to the mercy of forces, such as, for instance, me.

Bill: Your Majesty, that is no choice.

Russell: Of course it is. Is it your human's welfare you value or your own desire? You are a fraction of my age. One day you'll see you can't have both. Well, we're all a little frazzled by the worries of the day. Why don't you, uh... sleep on it? Fresh graves are ideal for disposing of an unwanted body.

Scene 3: Cemetery - Sookie, Eric

Eric: The ground's already disturbed, so no one would think to dig again.

Sookie: So much for keeping him alive so we could question him.

Eric: Well, that's what I was planning.

Sookie: But then you saw his brand.

Eric: Brings back many memories. Unpleasant ones.

Sookie: If you'd given me a chance to listen to his thoughts--

Eric: You have no concept of how dangerous werewolves are.They're virtually silent. They have no fear of death. And when they've had a bit of our blood, their strength can be a challenge. Even for me.

Sookie: Like I said, thanks for saving my life. How's your b*llet wound?

Eric: Well, it would have healed a lot faster if you had--

Sookie: I will never fall for that again.

Eric: Maybe the next time you sh**t me. I'll walk you back.

Sookie: Do you know anyone named Jackson? It's the only thing I could make out. Maybe that's the person he's working for.

Eric: Jackson is where he lives. He had a Mississippi accent. Can't you people tell the difference?

Sookie: Oh, my God, he's from Jackson? Do you think that's where Bill is? Eric, we have to go, like yesterday.

Eric: I can't. Not yet. The problems of the world consist of more than finding your missing boyfriend. You shouldn't go by yourself, either. These werewolves are looking for you. You're no good to Bill or to me if you're dead.

Sookie: How can you expect me to sit around when we have a lead?

Eric: It'll be morning by the time you get to Jackson. If you're planning on rescuing a vampire during daylight I have seriously overestimated your intelligence. At least take the day to think it over.

Sookie: Fine. I'll leave tomorrow. But I have to go. Bill would do it for me. I don't expect you to understand.

Eric: I understand very well.

Sookie: If I do get into some kind of trouble, you'll feel it, right? How fast can you get to Mississippi?

Eric: Probably not fast enough. Stay out of trouble, Miss Stackhouse. It'll do us both a favor.

Scene 4: Motel room - Tara, Franklin

Tara: Go, go. Go ahead. Bite me. Go on, f*cking do it. (He doesn't bite her) What the hell? I said you could bite me.

Franklin: No.

Tara: Why not?

Franklin: Because you want me to.

Scene 5: Micken's house - Tommy, Joe Lee, Sam, Melinda

TV: Okay, here we go. Final table at Festa al Lago about to get under way. We started five days ago with 368 players. We are down to our final six. The winner today is gonna take home over $1 million.

Sam comes in.

Joe Lee: Whoa. Hey there. Uh. Wasn't expecting company. Tommy said you split. Oh, he told you that?

Sam: He must have misheard. I'm not the kind to skip out on his own blood kin.

Joe Lee: Course you ain't. Hey, Lindy. Sam's back. I'll go get her. Mama?

Sam: I don't appreciate you trying to get me k*lled.

Tommy: I don't appreciate you coming into my house like you belong here. I figured since we're related, you could keep up, but...

Joe Lee: How the hell should I know? We never have guests.

Melinda: Pull them off the bed. Come on.

Melinda and Joe Lee come.

Sam: Well, now, hold on, hold on, now. I just came over to say goodbye. I wasn't gonna stay the night.

Melinda: We ain't letting you spend your money on no motel.

Tommy: Mama, if he wants to stay in a motel, let him.

Sam: No, I gotta get back to Bon Temps.

Melinda: At this time of night?

Sam: Yeah, well, I got my life back here just like you got yours here. I don't wanna intrude any more than I already have.

Melinda: Joe Lee, down the sink.

Joe Lee: Dadgum, I just cracked it open.

Melinda: Down the sink. Jesus H. You ain't seen your son in over 30 years, and you can't cork it for one night? We ain't alcoholics.

Joe Lee: Don't ever get married, Sam. The second you do, that's when they start to woman you.

Melinda: I know it may not look like it, but we are just so, so proud of you, and what all you done with yourself. I just-- I just wish we were the kind of people that could make you proud of us.

Sam: All right, listen. Stop worrying about what I think. Okay? Start with them. Okay? Now, come on. Take care of your mama.

Joe Lee: All right. Lindy. Lindy, come on.

Tommy: We'll see each other again.

Joe Lee: Lindy. You best get going before she climbs in the trunk with you.

Sam (to Tommy): You forgot these. You must have dropped them when you were changing... the oil.

Scene 6: Jason's house - Jason, Hoyt

Hoyt: You?

Jason: Yeah.

Hoyt: A cop?

Jason: Oh, I wish you were there. Tonight, boom, the universe showed me my destiny. And for me, that's to protect and serve the citizens of Renard Parish. Police work just ain't about tackling people. There's marksmanship, paramilitary training. I got all that now. And let's face it, would you feel safe with me patrolling the streets or Andy Bellefleur? Yeah, that's what I thought. That's what I thought.

Scene 7: Motel room - Tara, Franklin

Tara: Oh, my God. What the hell just happened?

Franklin: You lost yourself to the void. I'd claim it was a gift, but actually, it's common to most vampires.

Tara: I-- I never do this.

Franklin: What, one-night stands? Cheap motels? Vampires?

Tara: None of it. No offense. Actually, the cheap motel, yes. But only once. Come to think of it, why do you need a motel room? Don't y'all sleep in the ground?

Franklin: It's nice to have a place to shower, shave, and ravage you.

Tara: f*ck. Did this all happen because we b*at the crap out of a couple rednecks tonight?

Franklin: You did. You would've k*lled them if I hadn't have stopped you.

Tara: Wanted to.

Franklin: Where does all that come from?

Tara: No. You don't wanna poke that.

Franklin: Oh, I'm entitled to a little bit of curiosity. I hardly know a thing about you. I don't know if you have a husband or a boyfriend.

Tara: Listen, this was great and all-- Okay, mind-blowing. But let's not make it into something that it wasn't. Just take me home.

Franklin: Well, can I at least ask your name?

Tara: Oh, even better, I-I'll walk.

Franklin: My name is Franklin.

Tara: Please give it up. Knowing my name isn't gonna make you feel any less dirty, or me any less... Thanks, Franklin.

Scene 8: Fangtasia - Pam, Yvetta, Jessica

Pam is with Yvetta when the phone rings.

Pam: Fangtasia. This better be good.

Jessica: Oh, hi. Pam, it's Jessica Hamby. We talked yesterday. I'm the one who--

Pam: I remember you perfectly. What is it?

Jessica: Um... Well, I really desperately need your help. I don't know where Bill is, and, gosh, you guys are the only other vampires I know--

Pam: Spit it out, cupcake. I'm in the middle of something.

Jessica: Right. Um... You remember how I was asking how you would--? You know, what you would do if you, like, k*lled somebody by accident?

Pam: Did you call the hypothetical hardware store and buy a theoretical chain saw?

Jessica: Yes. And that's just the problem. I went to get the chain saw, and now he's gone.

Pam: What?

Jessica: I left for, like, 15 minutes and he just disappeared.

Pam: So the problem you have is that there is no dead body in your house?

Jessica: Yeah.

Pam: Doesn't sound like a problem to me. Gotta run. (She hangs up) Babies, they're all the same. Now, where were we? Oh, right. Lie back, sweetheart, and think of Estonia.

Scene 9: Merlotte's - Sookie, Sam

Sookie: Oh, my God, you have a brother?

Sam: Yeah. News to me too.

Sookie: What are they like?

Sam: Well, I'm more at home with the folks here.

Sookie: Speaking of which, you heard about the...?

Sam: Hm? Yeah. Jesus Christ. And Andy sh*t him?

Sookie: Welcome back, huh?

Sam: Good thing this town doesn't have many other bar options. So how long should I expect you gone for this time?

Sookie: Two, maybe three days at the most. If I leave by 4, I can get there by sundown. Sam, how can you expect me to stay here and do nothing when Bill might be in Jackson? You know me.

Sam: I know you well enough not to argue. You need anyone to--?

Sookie: If you really wanna help, I'm kind of leaving Jessica here on her own while I'm gone. Do you think you could make sure she doesn't do anything horrible?

Sam: How?

Sookie: I don't know. Give her a job? Just kidding. Can you imagine? Arlene would freak.

Sam: You don't get back, she's getting your job.

Sookie: I'll be fine.

Sam: Nice ring.

Soookie: Thanks.

Scene 10 : Jason's house - Jason, Hoyt

Hoyt: What is the rank between a sergeant and a captain in the Louisiana State Police?

Jason: Skip.

Hoyt: The legal blood-alcohol limit in the state of Louisiana is?

Jason: When you're drunk?

Hoyt: Uh, no.

Jason: Next one.

Hoyt: Jessica says it's too late for us to be together. What do you think she means by that?

Jason: Wait, that's on the test?

Hoyt: No, I'm asking you.

Jason: Look, come on, man. Not now. You're quizzing me. I'm in the zone.

Hoyt: Yeah, you're 0 for 22. At least this you could help me with.

Jason: All right, listen. I've heard every breakup excuse from "You're a son of a bitch, Stackhouse" to "You're a f*cking assh*le, Jason." And you know what? They're all saying the same thing. They can't handle the heat you're packing.

Hoyt: So Jessica is having trouble handling my heat?

Jason: The only thing to do is to move on to someone who can. That's why every girlfriend I've had has been hotter than the last.

Hoyt: I don't know how I'll find someone better than Jessica.

Jason: Man, there are two kinds of people in this world: people who got no dreams, people who got dreams and don't do nothing about it, and people who go out and fulfill their dreams. I'm the third kind. So you gonna help me out or not?

Hoyt: I'm trying to help you, but look, the website says you have to pass the written exam.

Jason: You think Andy Bellefleur knows half of this sh*t? There's gotta be an easier way. Look, I'm ready now. You know? I know between good and evil. I'm like a ninja-level marksman. I got all the training I need.

Hoyt: You wanna know what that blood-alcohol limit is?

Jason: I don't need to know it. If it's on the sample test, it's not on the real thing. Everybody knows that.

Scene 11: Doctor's - Arlene, Doctor

Arlene: Well, him and me, we haven't even talked about kids, but, well, maybe this is the good Lord telling me that this man's a keeper. Right? I mean, don't you think? You know, children being a blessing and all.

Doctor: Pardon, dear. Need to adjust the probe. Oh, yeah, that's better. Yup, there's the critter, see?

Arlene: That's my baby?

Doctor: It ain't much more than a head and a heart right now, but that's all you need, don't you?

Arlene: Oh, my.

Doctor: This one a bit of a surprise?

Arlene: Uh, a little, I guess. My boyfriend and me, we haven't been together for very long.

Doctor: Well, at least two, three months by the looks of it.

Arlene: Excuse me?

Doctor: Twenty-five millimeters from crown to rump. Yeah, I'd say the tadpole's at least nine weeks on.

Arlene: Nine weeks? Are you sure?

Doctor: Maybe ten.

Scene 12: Merlotte's - Tara, Terry, Mike

Tara: Terry, phone! I'm wiping.

Terry: I'm frying!

Tara: Merlotte's, this is Tara.

Mike: Hey, Tara. I'm glad I caught you. It's Mike Spencer. How are you?

Tara: Uh, I-I'm at work. How are you?

Mike: Heh-heh. You know, same old. Uh, well, um, I don't know if you heard, but the Talley funeral's today.

Tara: The what? Uh, you know, Eggs. We're down at the cemetery. Thought you might wanna come over, say goodbye.

Tara: Thanks, Mike. I'm leaving now. Don't start without me.

Scene 13: Cemetery - Tara, Mike, Sookie, Pastor

Tara: Where is everyone?

Mike: Just us. He didn't have any people, as far as I could find. Didn't know who else to call.

Tara: Well, I'm not-- I'm not blaming you. It's just at a funeral, you expect, you know, people. Loved ones.

Mike: Well, you're here.

Tara: If I'm the only one here, who paid for all this?

Sookie: I did. I understand if you don't want me here, but I thought at the very least Eggs deserved a real funeral.

Tara: No, come on. The casket's nice. You didn't have to.

Sookie: None of this makes me feel better about anything. But maybe it might help you.

Tara: It doesn't. I know you mean well. You always have. But there ain't anything anyone can do right now. Well, at least you got somewhere to come see him now. Might not seem like much, but I like having a place to go when I wanna see Gran. Every time I visit her, it hurts a little bit less. Will you come back home? It's okay if you're still angry with me. I'll be in Jackson for a couple days. I got a lead on Bill. You can have the house to yourself.

Tara: Lafayette's making me so crazy I wanna eat the wallpaper.

Sookie: I think this is everybody. Friends, we have gathered to pay our final respects to Benedict Talley. Your presence here assures that his memory will not be forgotten, as Christ assures that his soul will not be forsaken. Let us pray that he will find eternal peace and comfort in the arms of our Lord.

Scene 13: Cemetery back in 1868 - Bill, Caroline, Loren

Bill arrives in front of his house when a woman opens the door.

Woman: Who's there? Good God in heaven.

Bill: Caroline, my dearest.

Caroline: The w*r ended three years ago.I was sure you had perished.

Bill: I'm home now.

Caroline: I haven't slept an hour since you left. I prayed for you. I pleaded with God for your return. Especially in these last few days.

Bill: Is it Sarah? Thomas? Both?

Caroline: William... Come. I sent Sarah away to Tennessee. Thomas, he was too young. I tried to protect him.

Bill: You did all anyone could. I heard many children were taken. I feared the worst.

Caroline: No one will come for him. Undertakers won't touch anyone with the pox. I resolved to bury him myself tomorrow.

Bill: Thomas? It's your papa. I've come to see you off.

Caroline: Oh, William. You're as cold as the earth.

She sees his blood tears.

Bill: No. No. Do not be afraid.

Caroline: Are you afflicted?

Bill: I am. I was... My human life was taken from me.

Caroline: Are you a ghost?

Bill: I am here to bury our son.

Caroline: Uh...

Bill: I cannot be infected.

Caroline: What are you? What are you? What are you? Demon? The devil? You've taken my husband. I will not let you take my son.

Bill: Caroline, no. Listen.

Caroline: Stay back! Stay--!

She sh**t him but he heals. She goes out. Lorena's there.

Bill: Caroline.

Lorena: This is your doing, I assume?

Bill: Unhand her. She is my wife.

Lorena: In her condition, she's hardly more human than animal. Except for her blood, of course.

Bill: I will die before I allow you to harm her. Caroline?

Caroline: No, no, no.

Bill: Look at me. Look at me.

Caroline: No, no, no.

Bill: Caroline. Look at me. Caroline.

Caroline: k*ll me! I can't bear this anymore! Do what you will with my body. My soul will be safe. My soul will be...

Lorena: William, stop. Darling. Darling Caroline. I'm so sorry to have to do this to you.

End of the flash back. Bill wakes up in his bead.

Scene 14: Jason's work - Jason, Bud, Lafayette, Hoyt

Jason passes his exam in a classroom.

Bud: Can I help you, son?

Jason: Uh. Yeah, Bud. Um... Can I get another test paper? There's something wrong with this one.

Bud: I'd say there's something wrong with you.

Jason has no pants on him. Everyone laughs.

Bud: Jason, wake the f*ck up.

It was just a dream. Jason is in his truck.

Lafayette: Jason. Yeah. Yeah?

Jason: Oh, yeah, what's up? I was just getting my gloves.

Lafayette: I need your authorization on this PWE form before we, us, over yonder working, can do the other side of the road, supervisor.

Jason: Yeah, I know what you're thinking. But I got a lot on my mind lately.

Lafayette: That must feel new. Try spending every waking moment mopping up your cousin's tears and keeping her away from pointy objects. See how much sleep you get then.

Hoyt: Holy sh*t. Hey! Hey! Lafayette, Jason, anybody! Come on, help! Help!

Jason: I'm coming.

They found a body.

Hoyt: It's... It's dead. Got no head. It's got no head, man. It's got no head.

Scene 14: Sookie's house - Sookie, Alcide

Man's thought: That must be her. Said blond and pretty. No wonder the girl's a magnet for trouble.

Sookie runs to her house.

Man: Hey. Hold on. Hey.

Sookie: Get your g*dd*mn hands off me!

Man: I ain't trying to hurt you.

Sookie: You're a werewolf. I've had vampire blood. I'll kick your ass.

Man: Listen. Eric Northman's the one who sent me. My name's Alcide Herveaux. I'm here to look after you.

Scene 15: Merlotte's - Sam, Tommy, Joe Lee, Tommy

Joe Lee: Holy crap. Look at this layout. Hey.

Melinda: Sam.

Sam: Hey, what's going on?

Melinda: This all yours?

Sam: Yeah. Something the matter or...?

Melinda: No, no. After you left, we just got to wondering what kind of life you got down here.

Joe Lee: We figured we ain't got nothing else to do today, let's go see for ourselves. Didn't have to do much looking around to find you.

Sam: Uh-huh.

Tommy: Never thought any son of mine would have a place like this, though.

Sam: Yeah. Well, I thought, uh, I thought we agreed, uh-- Agreed to wait a piece, uh, you know, before getting back together again.

Melinda: Ain't you happy to see us?

Sam: Well, no, I didn't, uh, I didn't say that. I-I just don't do well with surprises.

Tommy: Mama, he doesn't want us here.

Sam: Hey, no. That's not true. That's...Y'all, uh-- Y'all came all this way, and I'm buying you lunch. All right?

Joe Lee: All right! Oh, good.

Sam: Whatever you want. Right. Okay? Come on.

Joe Lee: Always dreamed of having my own chicken shack. Right. I would call it Mickens' Chicken and Chitlins.

Tommy: Yeah, that'll happen.

Scene 16: Jason's work - Bud, Kenya, Andy, Mike

Kenya: Mr. Fortenberry states he was clearing the ditch to replace a drainage pipe when he located the victim.

Andy: The head and hands are missing, but there's no blood, so he probably bled out before being brought to the scene. Muscle tissue shows signs of tearing rather than cutting, so it looks like our unsub just tore his head clean off. Only thing I know can do that's a vampire.

Mike: That would explain why there's no blood.

Bud: I quit.

Andy: Hey, Bud, wait up. Where you going?

Bud: Did you hear me? I quit. I've had it with this sh*t. Every time we clear one m*rder, two more spring up. It's like crabgrass.

Kenya: We need you to sign the report.

Bud: You sign it. Or you. I don't care. Take this crap. All of it. Forty-three years and what have I got to show for it? Gaps in my brain and polyps in my ass. I don't need this horseshit!

Scene 17: Sookie's house - Sookie, Alcide

Sookie: The house is in no shape for guests, I know. It's a long story. I'll tell you about it in the car.

Alcide in his head: I hear you read minds.That true?

Sookie: Yes, it is.

Alcide in his head: Son of a bitch. So we could have a whole conversation with me sitting here clamped shut?

Sookie: Well, it's kind of rude with just the two of us, but in a room full of strangers, it might come in handy.

Alcide: I'll keep that in mind. What I don't understand is if you had Eric Northman's blood and all, why he can't look after you himself.

Sookie: It's not like that. I'm not his. How'd he rope you into taking me to Jackson?

Alcide: My old man, he's got a construction company in Caddo Parish. Came up a little short on a project. Went to Northman for a loan.

Sookie: Wouldn't be my first choice.

Alcide: Yeah, you take what you can get. Only reason I'm here is to help him get out of debt. I don't do favors for vamps. Plus, I know the pack is sniffing around. You ain't getting nowhere without an in.

Sookie: Are you friends with them?

Alcide: I wouldn't call them friends exactly. My ex is banging their leader.

Sookie: Sorry.

Alcide: That pack is a cancer to our kind. Weres have lived in Jackson for almost 200 years without a single human knowing it. Now these sons of b*tches come to town, there's a crime streak a mile wide. Not to say the rest of us are above v*olence, but you shut the barn door behind you.

Sookie: One of them came after me last night, in here.

Alcide: Yeah, Northman mentioned that. Looks like a hell of a fight. You gonna be ready for more of that in Jackson?

Sookie: They took someone I love from me. I don't know about you, but I was raised to fight back.

Alcide: Great. You'll get us both k*lled.

Sookie: I'll pack light.

Scene 17: Russell's house - Lorena, Bill, Caroline, Russell, Talbot, Cooter

Bill's flash back:

Caroline: What is she? Is she your--? Your wife?

Bill: No, she is not.

Caroline: Will she k*ll me?

Bill: I will not allow her to hurt you.

Lorena: You've hurt her enough for two lifetimes, William. I warned you. There's our world and theirs. Between lies only suffering.

Caroline: If you can k*ll me... please, I beg you, do it now.

Lorena: Make her forget. Go on. You brought this upon her. You must undo it.

Bill: Caroline. We can never be together. I was never here.

Bill and Lorena are in the cemetery in front if Thomas' grave.

Lorena: Goodbye, young Thomas. The only way to show your love for a human is to stay away. Forever. Do you understand now?

End of the flash back. Bill wakes up.

In another room:

Cooter: Johnson's my best g*dd*mn man.

Russell: They're all dumber than a box of rocks.

Cooter: Sir, that's unfair.

Talbot: To boxes maybe. Or rocks.

Russell: Talbot, dear, we forgot to offer Cooter a refreshment. Could you?

Talbot: Of course. Zima, correct?

Cooter: Sir, it's been 24 hours, and still no sign of him or the waitress.

Russell: Can your pack of imbeciles do nothing right?

Cooter: Somebody got him.

Lorena: Eric Northman.

Russell: Who?

Lorena: He's a sheriff under Sophie Anne. He has a perverse interest in that waitress. I'm sure he's been watching over her.

Bill arrives.

Russell: Ah, Mr. Compton. Good day's rest?

Bill: I've considered your offer. My service to Queen Sophie Anne has brought only suffering to me and the humans that I have lived amongst. I recognize that now. For their safety and also for mine... I hereby renounce my fealty to the kingdom of Louisiana... and I humbly pledge my loyalty to Your Majesty.

Russell: Wonderful. Ah. Wonderful. We don't need the girl after all.

Lorena: You're letting her go? But you gave me your word.

Russell: I have given my word. To Mr. Compton. And I intend to keep it.

Scene 18: Merlotte's - Jason, Tara

Jason: Hey. It's good to see you working and all.

Tara: It's my job.

Jason: No, I know. It's just, you know, after everything... it's good to see you're okay. I mean, you seem okay. Are you okay?

Tara: I'm getting there. Little by little.

Jason: Well, you know, I lost a lot of people I love too. Loved a lot. And if you ever wanna talk or whatever... Because you and Sookie are like sisters, and Sookie is my sister, so we're like family. Even though we ain't been that close lately.

Tara: Thanks. You're a good friend.

Jason: Yeah. Could be better. I should be there for you.

Tara: Wish I had you there the night that sh*t happened.

Jason: Yeah, but I wasn't there. I mean, the-- I'm sorry I wasn't there, and I'm sorry it happened.

Tara: Jason, what's with you? You didn't do anything.

Jason sees a hole on Tara's forehead.

Jason: Uh, Jesus. You know what, you're right. I shouldn't b*at myself up over it. If you need me, I'm gonna be over here.

Tara: What--? Jason.

Jason leaves.

Scene 19: Lafayette's house - Lafayette, Eric

Lafayette: God-- This m*therf*cker.

Eric: Hello, sweetheart. Hop in.

Lafayette: Listen. Listen, I moved what I could. I mean, even at half off, the sh*t is still expensive. I'm gonna need some more time.

Eric: Relax. You'll ruin your new ride.

Lafayette: Huh?

Eric: Pam's been a bit harsh lately. She's under a lot of pressure. I thought it would be a good time for a small gift to my, uh, top salesman.

Lafayette: What's the catch?

Eric: Well, you'll have to pay the insurance. I'm not an idiot. And I'm gonna have to sell you the car for $1 to avoid that pesky gift tax. Mind you, it may look a little, uh, out of place parked outside of that strange plywood hut you live in.

Lafayette: No, I ain't taking on no more of your sh*t.

Eric: You have great value, Lafayette. You're discreet, efficient, and you have a network of loyal customers with enormous disposable income. You could become quite wealthy if you wanted to.

Lafayette: I don't need no more money.

Eric: No? I never thought of you as lacking in ambition. But perhaps you're content with moth-eaten afghans and secondhand furniture.

Lafayette: I'll think about it.

Eric: Don't make me wait too long. You can owe me the dollar.

Scene 20: Merlotte's - Terry, Arlene, Sam, Tommy, Melinda, Joe Lee

In the kitchen:

Terry: Spit it out, baby. You're breaking up with me.

Arlene: No. No, it's not-- It's not--

Terry: "It's not you, it's me." If I had a nickel for every time-- I'd have 15 cents.

Arlen: No, it is me. It is. I'm... I'm... I got me a baby coming.

Terry: What?

Arlene: And I didn't wanna tell you because-- Because it--

Terry: Oh, my God. We're gonna have a baby?

Arlene: Yes, we are. You're gonna be a daddy. Only let's not tell anybody just yet.

Terry: Oh. Uh, uh... Thank you. Thank you, baby. I never dreamed in my life I could be so happy. Thank you for making my life mean something.

At the restaurant:

Joe Lee: Thank you, darling.

Sam: Hey. Whoa. How many has he had?

Joe Lee: The boy can hold his liquor. Go on, k*ll it.

Sam: Well, I don't care. He's underage.

Tommy: I'm right here, d*ck.

Joe Lee: He'll be 20 next April. What's the difference?

Sam: It makes a big difference to me if I lose my liquor license. What are you doing feeding him sh*ts anyhow?

Joe Lee: Listen, I've known my son a lot longer than you have. I suggest you don't tell me how to raise him.

Melinda: Joe Lee.

Sam: I suggest you follow the rules in my bar.

Joe Lee: You talk to me like I'm some kind of drunk.

Sam: Well, you are drunk.

Tommy: Dude, you throw a punch, you are so one of us.

Melinda: Okay, that's enough. God almighty, y'all sure know how to piss all over a perfectly fine reunion.

Sam: You should call it a night.

Melinda: Come on. Don't take it personal, Sam. Joe Lee ain't got a bad bone in him when he's sober. We'll go. I don't wanna embarrass ourselves any more than we already have.

Sam: Just make sure they get home safe.

Melinda: Get in the van, boys. We'll see you soon?

Sam: Sure.

Scene 21: Bill's house - Jessica, Franklin

Franklin knocks on Bill's door.

Franklin: Good evening, miss. Are you home alone tonight?

Jessica: Listen, buddy, I don't know what you have in mind, but you are messing with the wrong girl. (He comes in without an invitation) Hey, vampires can't enter a home without an invitation.

Franklin: A human home. And, uh, the last human owner of this house d*ed a year ago.

Jessica: f*ck. How come nobody tells me any of this?

Franklin: Come, Miss Hamby, sit down. I just wanna talk.

Jessica: So how do you know my name?

Franklin: It's my job. I find things.

Jessica: Yeah, well, what sort of things?

Franklin: Anything that needs finding. Do you have anything like that?

Jessica: Well, um, Bill Compton. He owns this place. He's been gone a couple days. I can't even reach him on his phone. Yes, him too, but, um, I was thinking of somebody else. Think hard. Has anyone else gone missing lately? Maybe this will jog your memory. (He shows her Hank's head) So you do know him.

Jessica: No. It's a head. How do you expect me to react?

Franklin: Come on. Tell me, where'd you meet this handsome devil? Hm? Who broke the ice? I'm guessing him. "You've sure got some pretty lips, girlfriend." Mwah.

Jessica: Stop. Just put it-- Put it down.

Franklin: The important part is that he's no longer a problem. See? I help you, you help me a little in return. Now... why don't you tell me everything you know about Bill Compton?

Scene 21: Jason's house - Jason

Jason finds a paper on his table. He burns it.

Scene 22: Merlotte's - Sam

Sam wakes up and goes in his office. He finds a bird.

Sam: Hey! Get back here! (Someone searched in his office and left his clothes) sh*t!

Scene 23: Lou Pine's - Sookie, Alcide, men at the club

Alcide: Might not look like much, but Lou Pine's, it's the oldest were bar in Mississippi.

Man1: Alcide. It's nice to see a face from the old pack. I figured the new wolves are drinking enough for all of us. Mm-hm. Who's the civilian?

Alcide: She's cool. She's a friend.

Sookie: Am I not dressed properly?

Man1: You look like dinner.

Alcide: I'll keep an eye on her, Hollis. Gonna have to split off. See you with me, they ain't gonna talk.

Sookie: Where are you gonna be?

Alcide: With my guys. I'll be watching you. You make it quick, for your own sake.

Sookie: Hey, boys. Oh, my God, I am so stupid. I left my wallet in the car, but I am parched. Any of you guys mind buying a girl a cosmo?

Man2: You here alone, cream puff? Oh, you are stupid.

Sookie: Oh, I've been to much tougher places than this. Any of you heard of a place in Louisiana called Fangtasia?

Man2: You're a fangbanger?

Sookie: There's nothing meaner or stronger than a vampire. What's not to like?

Man4: You'd be surprised.

Man4 in his head: If you knew we kicked the sh*t out of one a couple nights ago, you'd be on your knees right quick.

Sookie: Why don't you tell me about it?

She sees Bill in the car when he's been kidnapped.

Man4: Let's talk about it in private

Sookie: Sure. Why not?

Men: Yeah! Whoo! Yeah!

Man4: Me first or you?

Sookie: You know a vampire? Can you take me to him?

Man4: Like a three-way sort of deal?

Sookie: Come on, where is he?

Man4: Shut the f*ck up. I got more vampire blood in me than you think.

Alcide: Hey, assh*le.

The two men fight.

Men: Hey. What the f*ck you doing? Hit him. Get him. Yeah. Kick his ass. Yeah. Come on.

Hollis: g*dd*mn! I'm gonna run out of bats if he keeps this up. Now get him out of here. Now!

Men: Get him out of here. Let's go. Come on, let's go.

Hollis: Come on, man. She ain't worth it.

Alcide: I barely even know her.

Hollis: I mean Debbie.

Alcide: What about Debbie?

Hollis: Oh, sh*t. Um... Debbie's getting engaged to Coot.

Alcide: Come on, Hollis, stop it.

Hollis: The party's tomorrow night. Here. I'm sorry I gotta be the one to break it to you.

Scene 24: Sookie's house - Tara, Franklin

Franklin: Good evening, Tara.

Tara: Who told you my name?

Franklin: I met a delightful baby vampire tonight. Actually, no, she was irritating as all get-out, but she did tell me a great many things, such as your name and the fact that you live in a house owned by the human companion of Mr. Bill Compton.

Tara: Why is that important to you? Who do you work for?

Franklin: Well, now who's interested in getting to know me all of a sudden? Mind if I, uh, come in?

Tara: Hell no. I got a terrible track record with letting people into this house.

Franklin: Oh, don't be that way, Tara. Tara. That is such a beautiful name.

Tara: As far as you're concerned, my name is: "That girl from Bon Temps, huh? Wonder how she's doing. Too bad I can't get a hold of her anymore."

Franklin: Actually, I can get a hold of you any time I want. Isn't that right, Tara?

Tara: Yeah. You wanted to come in?

Franklin: If you insist.

Tara: Come in. Please.

Scene 25: Bill's room - Lorena, Bill

Lorena: Most impressive. You won the trust of Russell Edgington himself. A bravura performance.

Bill: I don't care what you believe. My only loyalty is to my king.

Lorena: Your only loyalty is to your own sentiment. It's your great failing. A century ago, it was to your human wife. Now it's that ridiculous waitress. You'll say anything to save her.

Bill: We can never love humans without bringing suffering upon them. You taught me that... and I will never forgive you for it.

Lorena: It's an essential truth, one you refused to face because you clung to the illusion of humanity.

Lorena: You are right. Is that what you wish to hear? You proved it to me once and now I've learned it again. You have won. You've deprived me of my freedom... and my home... my humanity. But I will never, ever love you. Never! Never!

Lorena: Yes. Make love to me.

Bill: Never. I will never.

Lorena: Oh, William.

They have sexe.

Lorena: I so love you.