02x12 - Surprise

[bunniefuu]

I'm engaged!

That's r... that's really great news, Joss.

Really?

Yeah.

Absolutely, you're getting married.

Previously on "Mistresses"...

You seem tense.

How can I contact you?

I'll come up with something...

A way to get in touch if you need me.

Who are you?

I really want to see you again.

Here's my number. Bye, Rebecca.

I need to talk to you about something.

Do you mind if I-I come in?

How did you find out where I lived?

Well, it wasn't easy.

I wasted a lot of time trying to track down a pediatrician named Rebecca.

You know, most people just give a fake number.

You really went the extra mile.

I'm sorry. I...

It's okay.

I don't blame you for not wanting to see me again.

That wasn't...

It didn't have anything to do with you, especially...

Look, it doesn't matter. It's not why I'm here.

Can I come in?

So the, uh... The bartender helped me out.

He remembered you.

Look, I want you to know that I never would have gone through all the trouble of finding you if it wasn't really important.

What is it, Ben?

I'm sick.

What do you mean?

I'm not sure how long or who gave it to me.

We should probably go see your doctor.

[Scoffs]

[Dog barking in distance]

Looky here.

What you got?

There's one number already programmed into the phone.

You sure it came from him?

Who else would it be from?

Are we done now?

We'll be in touch.

[Scoffs]

[Engine turns over]

Mm, you're late.

I still don't understand what we're doing here.

The engagement party next weekend is like a dress rehearsal for the actual wedding, okay?

It gives us an opportunity to iron out any of the kinks and taste free cake.

Oh, well, then sold.

So, we got three more RSVPs.

Oh, mom?

No. Well, whatever.

If she doesn't show up, it'll just give me more time to spend with Eleanor.

Hmm?

The mom.

Mm.

Did I tell you we're going registry shopping tomorrow?

Hmm.

We're probably gonna go to dinner if you want to join us.

Oh, that's sweet, but I actually have a date with Zack.

Hmm?

Zack asked me out, and I said yes.

Is that gross?

No, it's not gross. What are you talking about?

You're single. He's hot. I say...

You want to ride that pony, get on it.

[Groans]

[Laughs]

Okay, you don't have to ride the pony. Just go to dinner.

I'm not even sure I want to go to dinner.

Why?

I mean, I had a fun time hanging out with him, but...

Really, should I start dating now?

I'm 40.

So? Switch back.

Well, so, I mean, the last guy I dated was...

[Sighs] Was Harry.

Hello? Dom.

No, we skipped that part.

We went right from cheaters to boyfriend and girlfriend.

No, no, no, see, I prefer the term "lovers."

I don't know. With Harry, it didn't even feel like dating.

It was all so easy.

Did I ever tell you that the first time we ever kissed was on a surfboard?

Mnh-mnh.

He was trying to teach me how to do that pop-up thing.

Hmm.

I never actually popped up.

I'll bet he did.

The point is I did not see my life going this way.

Oh, you know, neither did I.

But maybe that's a good thing, honey.

Just saying.

To a life full of surprises.

And free cake.

Ding!

Ding!

I like this one.

That's my favorite.

Yeah, me, too.

[Gasps] Whoa, Nellie. Whoa.

Holy... Shish kebab!

Guy never heard of curtains?!

For the love of...

Exactly how much did you see?

Oh, I saw everything, April!

Twig and berries.

Okay, that's a whole lot of Harry.

Oh, and it was a-a-a lot of Harry.

Like, more than average.

Girl, I did not need to know that.

[Both laugh]

Neither did I, but, hey, I'm happy for him.

Good for Harry.

Please stop talking now.

[Bell jingles]

[Laughing] What?

Hey.

Oh, hey, Karen. You okay?

A man I slept with just tested H.I.V. positive.

Oh, my God.

Jacob?

No. A different man.

Okay, wait, I'm sorry.

W-who else were you sleeping with?

Oh, my God.

This is just like the time you two started watching "Scandal" without me.

Before Jacob and I got together, I was going through a phase.

She was having anonymous sex.

She... what?!

I slept with a few men... men I didn't know, men who didn't know me... and now one of them is sick.

You were safe, though, right?

Of course I was, but there's always a chance.

Oh, my God.

I-I can't believe this is happening.

No, wait. Shh. Hon... sweetheart, I know you're scared, but everything's gonna be fine. Just breathe.

What if I'm not?

What if this is the universe's way of punishing me?

What I did with those men... it was... Immoral, shameful.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

No, stop right there before I jezebel your ass.

You listen to me. You are a grown woman.

And if the universe is gonna punish you, then the universe is a sexist pig.

She's right.

I don't know.

Yeah, listen, listen, listen. I do.

You're spinning, Karen.

Just... and I know because I've been there.

You'll feel so much better once you get tested.

I know a clinic, and they'll give you fast results, okay?

I think I'd feel more comfortable with my own doctor.

But thank you. I'll go tomorrow.

[Sighs] Oh, I wish I can go with you, but I have to go back to the FBI office tomorrow so I can help my not-married ex-boyfriend find my not-dead ex-husband, who currently works for some drug-dealing overlord.

It's insane you don't keep alcohol here.

Seriously.

[Sighs]

Seriously.

Thomas: Agent Gordon pulled the serial number off the phone that was sent to you and was able to confirm it was purchased in Ohio.

So Paul's in Ohio.

Not necessarily.

We've run the phone through our systems, and it's not been used yet.

No calls incoming or outgoing.

He may have just purchased the phone in Ohio.

Or somebody else got it for him.

We can't be sure, but the point is your husband could be almost anywhere right now.

Stop calling him my husband.

All you have to do is keep Paul on the line long enough so agent Gordon here can pinpoint his exact location.

I'll need about 30 seconds. Maybe less.

Look, the key is just to keep it conversational.

Keep it light.

If I keep it light, he's gonna know something is up.

I told him I'd only contact him in case of an emergency.

You're right. So make up an emergency.

You know, something that matters to him.

Maybe...

Make it about your daughter.

A health issue.

I get it. I get it.

[Sighs]

What's gonna happen to him?

Excuse me?

Once you pinpoint his location, what's the plan?

What's gonna happen next?

[Sighs] Same as before.

We bring him in. He testifies against Olivos.

Then after that's done, we help him establish a new identity and a new life somewhere else.

With Miranda and Scottie.

If that's what he wants.

[Sighs]

[Sighs]

[Cellphone beeps]

[Ringing]

Paul: April.

Paul. I...

Keep this phone with you for the next 48 hours.

I'll contact you when I can. [Beeping]

What... what just happened?

It was a message. That wasn't him.

[Smack, thud]

[Cellphone chimes] Ooh.

It's Greta. She'll be here soon.

Interesting.

Is it?

Isn't it?

Is there something you'd like to discuss?

Um, yeah.

Are you seriously not gonna tell me that you're sleeping with Leggy McVunderface?

Keep your voice down, Joss.

You're acting inappropriately.

What?

Says the guy who boinked the boss!

How did this even happen? When? Why?

I need details, like, immediately.

Wow. Okay. Silent treatment.

Must mean you really like her.

Excuse me. Do you really like her?

It's none of your business.

Come on, dude. Since when do we not talk about stuff?

I tell you every time I have to pee.

That's your choice.

I certainly don't ask for that level of information, nor am I obligated to share my life with you the way you share yours with... everyone, okay?

Oh, you're talking about the time that I got all boozy with the uber driver?

Because that was a very special circumstance.

And he was a really good listener. I miss Habeeb.

Look, I... it's... I'm totally fine if you guys keep...

I don't care what you think!

I'm not your girlfriend, Josslyn.

I'm not your family. I'm not even your partner anymore.

So we don't have to do this.

[Exhales sharply]

[Footsteps approach]

Hello, my two favorite people on the planet.

Before we start, does anyone happen to bring any cashew milk?

No?

[Scoffs] Moving on, then.

You want to talk about it?

Talk about what?

Whatever happened to you for your face to look like that.

I'm sorry, honey. My mind is all over the place.

You miss Daniel, don't you?

[Sighs] Sorry.

Never mind. May I be excused?

Actually, uh, w-wait a second.

Uh, I've been meaning to talk to you about that Tahoe trip I said no to.

Are all of your friends still going tomorrow?

Yes.

Are you trying to make me feel worse about my life?

Do you still want to go?

Is that a trick question?

Well, I've been thinking about it, and you've worked really hard this semester, and I've been socking away a few extra dollars.

So if you still want to go...

I want to go.

[Chuckles]

Good, because I already called your teacher, and she has an extra room for you. [Laughs]

You'll have to share with three other girls, but...

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Thank you so much. You're so awesome.

I hope the food here is okay.

I've never been. But have you?

Uh, no, I haven't, but I heard good things.

Me too.

Not from anyone I actually know.

But Yelp liked it.

What did we do before Yelp, huh?

Yeah, right?

[Chuckling] Yeah.

Um, so, the other day, you mentioned something about a-a new job?

Oh. Right.

Yeah, it's not, like, a-a job job.

But do you remember how psyched I got when I got that Ducation eBay?

Mm-hmm.

So I started restoring these old bikes, and...

Anyway, it's... It's a long, boring story.

No, it sounds interesting to me.

I'd rather hear about your work.

Must be... Exciting being a lawyer.

What made you want to do that?

Oh, I-I was completely obsessed with "L.A. law."

So you only practice in L.A.?

No, no, no, "L.A. law" was a-a TV show.

Oh.

I don't really watch a lot of TV.

It's okay. I don't either, really.

[Indistinct talking over P.A.]

Just so you know, I'm not very good with blood tests.

I usually faint.

In fact, is it possible for me to lie down?

Let's do the questions first.

Then we'll worry about the blood draw.

In the past 12 months, have you had a blood transfusion?

No.

Have you gotten any tattoos?

No. My friend did, but not me.

Are you an intravenous-drug user?

No.

In the past 12 months, have you had unprotected vaginal, a**l, or oral sex?

Yes.

I-I mean, maybe.

Maybe?

It's possible.

One of the times, I was... very drunk, and I'm not sure if I used a condom.

I think I did, but I'm not sure.

In the past 12 months, have you had unprotected vaginal, a**l, or oral sex with men who have sex with men?

I-I don't know.

I mean, I don't know some of the men I slept with.

I mean... I don't know much about them.

In the past 12 months, have you had sexual contact with anyone who has H.I.V. or AIDS or has had a positive test for the H.I.V./AIDS virus?

You know what? I don't feel very well.

Do you want some water?

I have to go.

Are you sure?

I have to go now.

[Knock on door]

[Sighs]

Is Lucy... ?

[Sighs] Lucy's in Tahoe for the week.

[Door closes]

So, agent Gordon's gonna be here in an hour, so are you cool if he just sets up camp?

Yep. He can set up wherever he wants.

I don't care.

Okay.

I was kind of hoping we could talk before he...

There is nothing for us to talk about, Daniel.

I just want this whole thing over.

I understand.

No, you don't.

You will never understand what you did or how badly you hurt me, so just stop acting like you do.

Stop pretending like I meant as much to you as you did to me because it's only making it worse.

[Scoffs]

[Sighs]

So, uh, where are they sending Paul?

You mean... ?

When this is all over, will he be on the west coast?

I just want to know if I'll be able to find out for Lucy's sake.

[Sighs]

[Chuckles]

You're not sending him anywhere, are you?

[Sighs] Damn.

Man, you guys are... damn!

You know we gave him the opportunity to do the right thing months ago, and he didn't take it?

Oh, instead, he ran.

And he made the wrong choice again, which is why you find yourself in this situation right now.

He was scared. I'd probably do the same thing.

No, you wouldn't. You would never have been in this situation because you are nothing like him.

I didn't mean...

You know what? It doesn't matter, okay?

The FBI is not gonna make protecting Paul a priority.

Look, all we're trying to do is catch a bad guy.

What if you're the bad guy?

Oh.

[Gasps] Oh, my goodness.

How much do you love this salad bowl?

Oh, more than I love salad.

[Both laugh] [Beep]

This is seriously the funniest thing ever. [Laughs]

Hey, I'm so sorry again for canceling on you last night.

I didn't think I was gonna be working that late.

No, no, never apologize for having a career.

Once you start that, you'll never stop.

Oh. I'll remember that.

I don't even know why we were there that late.

I think it was so Greta could make googly eyes at Harry.

Who's Harry?

He's, uh, my former brother-in-law and the new chef at Wunderbar.

Ooh. That's a funny coincidence.

No, it's not.

I got him the job, which I'm regretting now that he's being a royal pain in the ass.

Hmm. And he's sleeping with Greta, which is a bad idea, right?

Ohh, these coffee mugs are cute.

[Beep] And then I tried to talk to him, and he got all weird and defensive and s...

I mean, it's not like I was gonna judge him, obviously.

That's the thing about Harry. He goes into this really private place.

It's so male, right?

Oh, I don't know. [Chuckles]

My Scottie isn't like that, is he?

Scott? Oh, God, no.

He doesn't have a private bone in his body.

He's all squishy and open.

[Both chuckle]

Harry, on the other hand, he's a brooder.

It must be an Australian thing.

He's got a real dark side. It's... [Sighs]

Is there something I need to worry about here, Joss?

Hmm?

For a woman who's about to marry my son, you're talking an awful lot about another man.

And you might be too young to realize this, but that's unseemly.

I'm sorry.

You should be.

Ooh! Look at this. These are nice.

[Cellphone ringing]

[Sighs] Hey, Zack.

Zack: Hey. Savi.

I was just calling to thank you for such a... a nice night.

Uh, yeah. It was fun.

I thought maybe we could do it again sometime.

Uh, you know, I just got put on a pretty big case.

Um, and I'm pretty sure it's gonna take up...

A lot of my time in the coming weeks. So...

Oh, man. I am such an idiot.

What? No, you're not, Zack.

I never should have picked that restaurant.

It... That wasn't even my jacket.

I-I had to borrow that from my brother.

Uh, the jacket had nothing to do with it.

I just...

I don't think I'm ready to date yet.

Well, you might be if I hadn't acted like such a stiff.

I don't know what happened, but last night... that wasn't me.

Yeah, it didn't seem like you.

I just wanted to make you comfortable, but instead, I made us both uncomfortable.

Zack, the whole reason I decided to go out with you was because I-I really like you.

Well, all right, then.

Give me one more sh*t. Tonight.

I'll take you to my favorite spot in L.A.

Okay, I do have a meeting, but I can meet you there after.

Great.

I'll text you all the details.

This'll be fun.

Looking forward to it.

[Cellphone beeps]

Agent Harris here is our point person in Florida.

It's nice to meet you, Ms. Malloy.

Where are they going?

Uh, they were gonna set up in your room, but if you'd rather they use Lucy's...

No, mine is fine.

I just didn't expect so many people in my house.

Just pretend we're not here.

That's not gonna be possible. [Cellphone rings]

I need to take this. If you'll excuse me.

[Sighs]

You okay?

[Door opens]

Yeah. I'm...

No. [Chuckles]

Hey.

[Door opens]

It's just me. I forgot my iPod.

Lucy.

Daniel?

What's going on?

Lucy, sweetie, I...

Come here. [Laughs]

Ohh.

I think you grew an inch.

I did not.

Are you sure? You look taller.

That's why you let me go... so you and Daniel could get back together.

We're just talking, sweetie.

[Horn honks]

[Sighs] Well, everyone's waiting for me, and I got to go.

But whoever did the bad thing, can you apologize to the other person and get back together?

Working on it, okay?

Okay.

Aw.

[Smooches]

Love you, baby.

Love you, guys.

Bye, Luce.

[Door closes] [Sighs]

Announcer: You can see he's made a Valiant effort, but unfortunately he's come up short.

[Crowd cheering]

[Knock on door]

Torres looking for the equalizer.

[Crowd groans] Just wide!

[Television turns off]

Hey.

Hey.

Did I wake you up?

[Chuckles] No, no, not at all.

Uh, come in.

Thanks.

[Door closes]

Sorry to barge in on you like this, but I-I actually need your help with something.

Um, I wanted to get Joss an engagement gift.

Right. [Chuckles]

Uh, didn't you just get her a car?

I did. Yeah. Yeah. Sure did.

Unfortunately, that didn't go over so well.

Yeah, note to self, do not buy Joss luxury automobile.

Right.

[Both laugh]

But, uh, yeah, no, I was thinking jewelry, but nothing's gonna Tr*mp the ring, right?

Oh, no. I cannot see how.

But I still want to get her something, so...

Well, uh, Scott, yeah, instead of something showy, you could always go the personal route, you know?

Just a thought.

Right, which is exactly why I'm here.

I figure you've known Joss forever, since when she was a kid, right?

Yep. That's true.

Right.

So, you know, I figure maybe...

I don't know... You might have some insight as to what she might like.

You know, I mean, I hate to admit it, but you got a little bit of an advantage on me here, time-wise.

[Chuckles]

[Sighs]

Yeah, you know, uh, nothing comes to mind... Scott, but I'll have a think about it, okay?

Okay. All right. Yeah. Thank you.

Appreciate that.

[Door opens]

Record player.

[Door closes]

What's that?

Uh, Joss' father d*ed when she was 6 years old.

She never had a chance to know him, but he... he left her a stack of records... some Dylan and Neil Diamond, and she...

She keeps them all in this special case under her bed, I think, and...

Yeah, I've seen it. The case of records with...

I-I know what you're talking about, yeah.

They're her only real connection to her father, and I'm sure you know how Joss is about family, right?

It's everything to her, probably because she never...

Never had one... not a proper one, anyway.

Yeah, she mentioned that, too.

I don't think she's ever played the records, as far as I know.

But if she had a record player...

You know, maybe she would.

Record player.

All right.

All right. Seems kind of small.

I like the idea, though.

Check this out.

So, what if I get a jukebox, all right?

Pre-program all those songs into it.

Now, that's cool, right?

[Scoffs] Wow.

Yeah?

Oh, yeah.

Thank you. Thank you.

[Door opens, closes]

[Scoffs]

[Laughs]

Well, she went from being cute new mom to annoying mother-in-law in two seconds.

I mean, wha... am I crazy, or did the woman completely overreact?

That depends.

Did you really spend the entire time talking about another man?

Oh, my... I wasn't talking about another man.

I was talking about Harry, my friend, who hurt my feelings.

Okay, okay.

Come on!

Are you just never allowed to talk about another person with a penis once you get married?

[Laughs] Apparently not.

But you can talk to me.

Hmm.

What happened with you guys?

Uh, you're obviously really upset.

No, never mind. It's stupid. Forget about it.

I want to talk about you.

What happened at the doctor's?

Did they tell you when you'd get the results?

I couldn't do it.

Karen.

I couldn't.

All those questions... Joss, I'm not ready.

What do you mean?

I'm not sure if I was safe with him.

I don't know. So it's possible.

Okay.

Okay?

And if it's possible, I need to know if I can handle it.

Hey, you can handle it.

No, I can't. I'm not prepared for this.

If I'm positive...

Honey, you're not positive.

If... if I'm positive...

I need to be ready for it, and I'm not ready.

Listen to me.

One time, okay?

There was this one time that I was absolutely sure that I was gonna test positive.

There was this guy in... Whatever.

Anyway, it doesn't matter.

But I was [Chuckles] completely freaked out.

So you know what I did?

I drove to the beach in Malibu, and I sat on a rock, and I stared at the ocean because I just wanted something to make me feel small, which it did.

And I know it sounds really cheesy, honey, but it worked.

This... this thing... perspective... the idea that everything that we're going through... it's... it's not really as big as we think it is.

It all seems, you know, so important until it doesn't.

You know?

[Sighs] I know.

But I hate the beach.

Oh. Come here.

Give me a hug. Ohh.

[Sighs]

♪ Danger in the shape of something wild ♪

My brother used to wait tables here back in high school, and I've known the owner since I was a kid.

It's so great. I can't believe I've never been here before.

Two bowls of seafood gumbo, extra spicy.

Ha ha! Thank you kindly.

Well, aren't you the gentleman? He must really like you.

I don't think I've heard a "thank you" in all the 10 years I've known this fool.

[Laughs]

Hey, now.

No, you're right. It's more like 15 years.

Uh, you can get out of here now, Debbie.

[Chuckles] I'm just messing with you.

He's one of the good ones. [Chuckles]

♪ Hot child in the city ♪

[Cheers and applause]

Whoo!

Thank you, guys.

Now, now, I do believe that I see Zack Kilmer in the crowd tonight, everybody.

[Cheers and applause]

What are the chances you can come on up here and... and do us the honor, huh?

No, thank you, Glen. Uh, not tonight.

Wait a minute. Wait a minute. You sing?

Uh, only when I'm drunk, which will not be happening tonight.

[Laughs]

Don't worry.

Hey, Zack, Zack, come on.

Zack, one song. Let's go.

Come on.

Get up here. Get up here, man.

[Cheers and applause] Come on.

Come on!

Okay. But you can't leave.

I'm not going anywhere. I'm gonna put this on YouTube.

[Cheers and applause]

What are we doing?

Uh, you call it, sunshine.

You know "What I'm feeling"?

Man: All right. All right.

Oh, boy.

[Drumsticks tapping]

♪ I can't stop this feeling ♪
♪ deep inside of me ♪

[Rhythmic clapping]

♪ Girl, you just don't realize ♪
♪ what you do to me ♪
♪ when you hold me ♪
♪ in your arms so tight ♪
♪ you let me know ♪
♪ everything's all right ♪

Help me out, everybody.

♪ I-I-I'm hooked on a feeling ♪

[Elevator bell dings] [Sighs]

April?

Uh, if you're looking for Savi, you already missed her.

I know. [Sighs] I'm actually here to see you.

I was hoping you might be able to help me with something.

Oh, I could eat that entire meal all over again.

It's addictive. I told you.

Wait a minute. Where's my car?

You parked behind the restaurant like I said, right?

No, I parked right there because it's in the front.

It's a great spot.

You've got to be kidding me!

I could take you to the tow place. It's not far from here.

On... on your bike?

Like... No, it's... it's fine.

I'll just take a cab. I'll be fine.

You'll be waiting at least 20 minutes.

I have an extra helmet. I'll... I'll go real slow.

[Sighs] I don't know, Zack.

You can trust me. I promise.

[Engine revving]

Doing okay?

Savi: Zack! Zack!

Zack, stop!

Stop!

Zack, stop!

[Breathing heavily] Are you insane?!

My God, Savi, I'm sorry. I didn't hear you.

What's wrong with you?!

Please. I am so sorry.

Don't come near me.

All right, I'm... I'm calling you a cab right now.

I'm really sorry.

You know, I know you don't do carbs, but you simply must try this.

You've got to be kidding me.

Right-o. All the more for me.

No, it's not that.

I booked this huge spread in Italian vogue, but the date of the sh**t conflicts with our opening.

I told my manager at least a hundred times not to screw this up.

Well, we can always move the opening, right?

The sh**t could take a few weeks.

I would hate to lose the momentum we've been building.

So we'll do it before you go.

I'm leaving a week from Wednesday.

Next weekend, then.

You think you'll be ready?

Mm. I was born ready.

Hmm.

Well, in that case...

Let me show you how grateful I am.

All: Our father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.

Can I help you?

I've never been here before.

But my friend is a member of your congregation...

April Malloy?

I know April. She has that adorable little girl.

I'm Ella.

Hi, Ella.

Nice to meet you.

Can I offer you a prayer book?

That's okay. I don't need one.

I know all the words.

[Chuckles]

You're devout catholic?

My parents were.

We used to go to church all the time, but I haven't been in many years.

Why not?

[Voice breaking] I'm not sure if I believe in God anymore.

But suddenly, I find myself needing something more, something bigger than myself, and here I am.

You don't have to believe in God to believe.

Choir: ♪ I, the lord of sea and sky ♪
♪ I have heard my people cry ♪
♪ All good men in time will see ♪
♪ My hand will save ♪
♪ I, who made the stars of night ♪

[Cellphone ringing]

♪ I will make their darkness bright ♪
♪ Who will bear my light to them? ♪

Paul?

It's me. What's going on? Is Lucy okay?

♪ Whom shall I send? ♪

They're after you, Paul... the FBI. They're onto you.

♪ Here I am, lord ♪

[Cellphone closes]

♪ Is it I, lord? ♪
♪ I have heard you ♪
♪ calling in the night ♪
♪ I will go, lord ♪
♪ if you lead me ♪
♪ I will hold your people in my heart ♪

Who the hell are you?

I'm April's lawyer.

Good. She's gonna need one.

All right, so on the night, it's gonna look like this.

Although, uh, we might try something a little different for the investors.

So, there we go.

Joss: Harry.

You're not gonna believe this.

Greta just texted me that we're moving the soft opening to next weekend.

Well, of course I can believe it.

I was the one who suggested it.

You? Um, are you freaking kidding me?

[Scoffs] Okay, guys, just take a break. Thanks.

Calm down. I only suggested it because the alternative was to move the opening by a few weeks.

It didn't seem like a smart move, so...

Harry, my engagement party's next Sunday.

Right.

Yeah, right, okay. I... yeah, I'd forgotten.

Wha... you forgot? I... how... ?

Who are you right now?

Okay, look, that's not a... that's not a big deal.

Your party's on a Sunday, right?

We'll move the opening to the Friday night.

Gives you plenty of time to do whatever it is you need to do.

No, actually, it's a huge deal, Harry.

Scott has family flying in for this, not to mention I have like 16 meals planned for the weekend.

But that... That's not even the point.

How could you... how could you forget?!

What the hell is wrong with you, Harry?!

Do you not realize that I've spent the last year of my life doing everything for you?!

Making your freaking life my priority?!

What... everything that happened with Savi, I was there for you.

With work... I've saved your ass not once but twice at this point!

And what... now that you have everything you want, and you're just gonna dump me?!

Okay, right-o!

As usual, you're overreacting!

Am I?! Really?! Because I don't think that I am!

Of course you don't think!

It's the world according to Joss, where everything is about you, and it's always a drama!

I'm sorry I forgot about your party, okay?!

But it's just a party!

[Dishes clanking]

Ohh, geez.

I mean, it's not like this wedding is ever gonna happen, anyway.

[Voice breaking] You need to take that back.

Oh, please, you barely know this guy!

And now what?! You're gonna walk down the aisle with him?!

Why?! Because he's rich?!

Because you... you like his mother?!

Oh, my God.

You know what, Joss?

The whole thing is ridiculous! It's ridiculous!

And I'm not about to lose this restaurant because of your first marriage.

So, you know, just whatever.

Everything Savi said about you... everything... was right.

You're mean as a snake, Harry.

You know what? Let me tell you something.

When you found out that you were the reason that Savi couldn't get pregnant, you ignored her for weeks.

And when she tried to talk to you about it, you yelled at her, and I defended you!

Me! Every time!

But now I get it.

It was your fault, Harry.

The reason your marriage failed was your fault!

And now you're sleeping with the boss, which means it's... It's only a matter of time before you ruin this, too!

You'll be fired before we even open, and you know what?

I won't be here to fight for you anymore, Harry!

[Metal clangs]

[Knock on door]

[Birds chirping]

[Sighs]

I was afraid if I called, you might not pick up.

It's okay. Come on in.

I just wanted to see how you were doing.

And... Apologize again.

I can't stand the thought of you hating me.

Y-your friendship gave me a reason to wake up those mornings when, uh, I really didn't want to.

Your friendship meant a lot to me, too, and I'm sorry about last night.

I-it wasn't your fault.

I just...

Got scared.

Terrified.

I really thought I was gonna die, except this time, I actually saw it coming.

I had one of those moments that everybody talks about.

You know, where you could see your life flash before your eyes.

I mean, it was crazy, but it's... it's real.

And then the weirdest thing happened to me.

What?

I had a moment of clarity.

In the last few months, I've been second-guessing everything... you know, doubting myself and everyone around me.

And then last night...

I don't know... for the first time, I felt something absolutely real and absolutely true.

Well, what was it?

[Knock on door]

Hey. I called you as soon as I could.

I'm pretty sure they don't know where I am.

Good. That's good.

Domingo knows I didn't say anything about him to anyone, right?

I mean, whatever you guys need me to do, I'll do.

I mean, he... he knows that, right?

He knows. Why don't you come with me now?

Where are we going?

I'll tell you in the car.

Joss: Ugh. Hey, I'm home.

All right. Finally.

I've been waiting on you for the past at least eight minutes.

Close your eyes.

Oh, no, babe. I'm really not in the mood.

No, no, close your eyes.

Oh, come on.

Are they closed?

Yes.

Okay.

[Billy Joel's "Always a Woman" plays]

♪ She can k*ll with a smile ♪
♪ she can wound with her eyes ♪

What the... ?

♪ And she can ruin your faith with her casual lies ♪

I thought, um...

I thought we could play that at the wedding.

♪ And she only reveals what she wants you to see ♪

And, uh that way, it would be like your dad was with us.

Ohh.

♪ She hides like a child ♪
♪ but she's always a woman to me ♪

Oh, my God.

I love you.

♪ She can lead you to love ♪
♪ she can take you or leave you ♪
♪ She can ask for the truth ♪

Thank you for marrying me.

♪ But she'll never believe ♪

Thank you for asking.

♪ And she'll take what you give her ♪
♪ As long as it's free ♪
♪ Yeah, she steals like a thief ♪
♪ but she's always a woman to me ♪
♪ Oh, she takes care of herself ♪
♪ She can wait if she wants ♪
♪ she's ahead of her time ♪
♪ Oh, and she never gives out ♪
♪ but she never gives in ♪
♪ she just changes her mind ♪
♪ she is frequently kind ♪
♪ and she's suddenly cruel ♪
♪ she can do as she pleases ♪
♪ she's nobody's fool ♪
♪ and she can't be convicted ♪
♪ she's earned her degree ♪
♪ and the most she will do ♪
♪ is throw shadows at you ♪