01x02 - Love Me Tinder

[bunniefuu]

[Whistling]

♪ Black is the color of my true love's hair ♪
♪ Hair ♪

Jesus Christ, Carter!

Hi.

What are you doing in my bed?

Your bed is comfy.

What's the thread count, like 400?

What? Is that my iPad? Is that my robe?

Don't move, hold on.

[Camera clicks]

I'd like my keys back, please.

Yeah. You look angry.

I am angry.

No, Natalie's not gonna be attracted to angry Coop.

Here. Look.

Yeah. She wants sensitive Coop.

Hold on.

[Camera clicks]

Carter--

Look at that selfie. Do you see?

That's a soulful selfie right there, all right?

Is it?

That's like sting's younger brother right there.

You're out of your mind. You know that?

I'm proactive.

I got you on Tinder, I put you on Cuddlr.

I don't even know what language you're speaking.

That's how people find each other today, you technophobe.

I'm not a technophobe. Why do you always say that?

'Cause you watch live TV.

I am on Facebook.

[Old-man voice] Oh, you're on Facebook? Okay, Grampy.

You got your Facebook and your MySpace and--

Carter, listen--

You got your Commodore 64.

It's pre-dawn. The sun has barely made--

[normal voice] No, I am bringing you into the 21st century, my friend.

Well, I'm a happy little Luddite, so don't worry about it.

Yeah, you don't look too happy. Look.

All right, I can't put Mr. Angry on Tinder.

Tinder is what, again?

It's a dating app.

Well, I don't need the Internet to help me with dating, all right?

Look, Mr. Don Juan, not all interwebs point to something tawdry.

You know, Natalie's either looking for you or she's looking for love, and either way, unless she's a neanderthal like you, she's on Tinder.

Oh, whatever, Carter.

I'm on a mission.

I'm gonna find you Natalie, because we're friends.

That's what a friend does.

And I do owe you.

Will you stop with that sh*t, please?

You saved me from homelessness.

No, I let you know that there was a studio available in the building.

You got me out of paying a broker's fee, and in New York, that is like giving away your firstborn.

Well, you know what? I regret it now.

You won't regret it when I find you Nat-Nats, right?

Okay, you know what-- I'm late.

Will you please never come here this early in the morning again, ever?

It is not healthy to be this grumpy this early.

It's this 8:30 class.

"Psychology of social behavior"?

I mean-- is this your coffee?

Yep.

A month into it, social behavior dictates that no one wants to take a required early-morning seminar.

Look at your face.

What? What's wrong with it?

I cannot "like" that face.

It's just Mr. Sourpuss here.

I don't know what that means when you talk like that.

I'm serious now.

This is competition, all right?

You know, if you're second place, you're still losing first.

Right?

You're number one at losing.

Hmm. Well said.

Okay?

Look, right here. Boom.

No.

Uh-huh.

No.

No. It's endless--

Whoo. Mufasa!

She's unbelieve--

She's, like, on the block.

You know what? She might be even in the building.

How would you know where she is?

'Cause it's Tinder. They use GPS.

Isn't that stalking?

No, no, it's nothing like stalking.

No, Tinder allows you to know exactly where a person is, they don't know that you know that, and then you go find them, and then you f*ck them.

I'm just glad to be near her right now.

That's not Natalie.

No, it's not. It's Tiffany.

It's Tiffany on the Tinder.

[Knock on door]

[Scoffs]

All right, I'm not getting that.

I'll get it.

Don't get it.

Okay.

Don't get it.

You know what?

I'm getting you on Twitter...

Uh-huh.

Instagram, Match, eHarmony, JDate.

Wait. JDate?

Yeah. Natalie.

Natalie Portman.

Oh, she's Jewish.

Jewish, right. Yeah.

I'd convert for that black swan.

Scarlett Johansson-- she's a proud member of the Jewish clan.

[European accent] Mila Kunis.

That's not how you say her name.

Yep, it is.

Gwyneth.

Really?

I have no idea.

[Knock on door]

Jennifer Connolly, Lisa Kudrow.

Diane: Hey, Jackson?

Rachel Weisz.

Oh, you really did you research.

[Knock on door]

You know what they say about Jewish women?

I'm gonna stop you. You're a pig.

Jackson?

Can you get out of my house, please?

[Knock on door]

And leave the iPad and the robe.

What, do you want me to walk out of here naked?

How did you walk in here?

[Knock on door]

Hey, Jackson?

♪ Hey ♪
♪ Oh, my love, let me be your fire ♪
♪ We're a thousand miles up, and I'm about to get higher ♪
♪ Feel my heart b*ating out my chest ♪
♪ You're the only prayer I need to make me feel blessed ♪
♪ Singing oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ You make me feel blessed, you make me feel blessed ♪
♪ You're the only prayer I need to make me feel blessed ♪

[Knock on door]

Good morning. Hello.

Oh.

Nice robe.

Thanks, man. It's Coop's.

We have the same first initial-- "C," so...

Oh, aunt Diane and my mom are the same.

Debbie and Diane.

Yeah, man, a robe is-- wearing a robe is class.

Yeah, like Hefner.

[Toilet flushes]

Yes, the Hef.

Wait, what do you know about Hugh Hefner?

Oh, my god. Are you kidding me?

What is wrong with you people?

We made you banana bread.

Thank you, but I-I-- you know, do you not have any boundaries, any of you?

We made it?

Okay, fine, Shad make it.

'Cause, you know, bananas make me puke.

Diane, it's not even 7:30 in the morning.

I need you to take shad to the doctor.

Um... No, I can't.

I can't do banana bread. I can't even talk. Goodbye.

Hey, are you contagious?

Aunt D?

He doesn't want me to take him.

I can't do it.

He's got man problems.

What's wrong with the sausage?

Jackson: What's going on with your junk?

I got this.

Goodbye.

Please, Jackson.

Diane, I'm sorry. I wish I could.

I'm running late. I got to get ready.

[Sighs]

Oh.

Come on, Shadrach. I'll take you.

Shadrach: This is like the time you asked me to film the birth.

Come on. You're being dramatic.

That's nasty.

Okay, honey, look. I was there when you were born, okay?

I even helped your mom clean your little circumcised pen--

Oh, my god!

La-la-la-la-la!

I'm sorry. I did.

I can take him.

True story.

It's a 10:30 appointment.

It's cool. Did you bake this?

He's talented.

Yeah. Get over here.

First question-- have you seen this girl before?

Maybe in the-- in the neighborhood or in the building or anything?

Mm. She's cute.

Oh, she is.

Right?

Is she the one?

No, no, that's not Natalie. That's Tiffany.

Hello, Tiffany.

Right?

Okay, are you guys still here?

Hey, never date a girl called Tiffany.

Why not?

Yeah, why not?

Look, just trust me.

Oh, 'cause all girls named Tiffany are sluts.

Whoa. Take it easy.

Hey, Shadrach!

Is anybody gonna leave my house? I have to go to work.

It's fine. I'll lock up.

No, no, I got it.

Because I'm gonna use the DVR to record a prenatal yoga.

I'm gonna change the locks.

I have to do a loofah.

What's a loofah?

What's a loofah?

Oh...

It's like a 45-minute procedure. It's like...

See, look at these knees.

It should never take that long.

See how ashy that is? Look at that.

I didn't think white people got ashy.

Who's-- who's white people?

[Sighs]

Hey, guys, I'm sorry I'm late.

Morning, doc. Morning, Dr. Cooper.

Hi.

Uh... g*ng, it's 8:40.

8:40.

Where is everyone?

Week 5-- the drop-off.

The drop-off?

For one month, you'll see every student, and then there is the inevitable drop-off.

Yeah, but this is a seminar.

You're so cute.

[Chuckles]

Oh, we will have a deeper discussion with fewer.

Yeah, more intimate.

N'est-ce pas?

Aah!

Good morning, Kevin.

It's "Kelvin."

Like the temperature?

Kelvin. Got it.

That was a misguided, yet literal attempt at the sleeper effect.

Sleeper effect.

Okay, why don't we, uh, get started?

Let's get started.

Aunt Diane told me to say thanks.

In advance?

Yeah, I guess.

I'm like your surrogate dad.

Not really.

Your kindly uncle.

Aunt Diane's available neighbor.

You think people will think I'm your real dad?

No.

Yeah. My Sonny?

My Sonny Boy, my progeny from another brother.

What? That doesn't even make sense.

So, what's the problem in your private parts?

Did you dip your hand in the jar when there was too many sour patches?

What? No!

Ignored the expiration date when you drank the milk?

Is that something that people say?

Too many people been on the bus?

[Laughs]

Did you eat Sushi on a Monday?

Seriously?

What?

No, that's a good one. That's a real thing.

You're not supposed to eat Sushi on a Monday.

That can't be true.

No, the fish comes in on a Thursday.

By Monday, it's bad tuna.

No restaurant would make it so you could get food poisoning Monday through Wednesdays.

Okay. Eat Sushi on a Monday, then.

Yeah, I will.

Be my guest.

So, what's the problem, man?

It's nothing!

It's not nothing.

You've been doing the itch walk this whole time.

You're moving...

Can we not talk?

Let's get the bus. Let's get that bus.

Come on, bus! Come on, bus!

Come on! Sad-rash needs a doctor!

[Laughs]

And your belly's aligned with your spine.

Well, that's not fair. My butt is bigger.

Pull your feet inward, as close to your body as you can, and then just start moving your knees up and down.

[Ringtone plays]

To try and loosen the groin area in your inner thighs...

Oh!

...just like this.

Oh, sh**t.

You can tilt to the right...

Hello? Deb?

Wait, don't hang up. Don't hang up.

...just like this.

Oh. Oh, thank you for returning my messages.

'Cause I left 75 of them.

...some other poses.

Well, I don't give a sh*t what time it is in Kuala Lumpur, Deb.

I agreed to four months.

This is month 5!

Oh. "Important work."

Like-- like taking care of your son?

Really?

Because I am 7 1/2 months pregnant, Deb.

...and then push it out.

Okay, maybe it was a mistake, but at least I'm taking care of my responsibilities.

[Scoffs]

Deb, you raised me? Please.

If by "raised," you mean sat me in front of "Sesame Street" while you and your little nasty boyfriend made out in the basement, well, then yeah, Deb-- Sister of the Year.

[Laughs]

You are not serving your country.

You are playing diplomat because James gave a huge donation to the President, and now you're just--

Deb, fine, fine.

I will tell your son that you and your little diplomat husband don't care if his penis falls off.

Come get your son.

...kick out if you need to.

Ow. [Whimpers]

...and arch out.

So, maybe it's when someone feels something is attributed to something, theoretically?

That is not an example of attribution theory.

Yeah, it is.

Yeah, but no.

Doc? I have an example.

Jackson: Yes, Scarlett?

Oh, great. Let's hear it.

Let's hear it.

Say someone exposes a person's psychological problems in a book...

Scarlett--

...and then that client discovers the exposure and feels the need to react.

Kevin!

[Chair scrapes]

Kelvin.

Oh, hey, sunshine. Good morning. How was your sleep?

I'm still absorbing it.

Professor Cooper, I just want to say, I liked your book--

Guys, we are not talking about my book, okay?

I don't think the quality of the book is the problem.

I guess, like attribution theory would say, that professor Cooper couldn't accept his success, and so he self-sabotaged by punching that guy.

I'm gonna fail all of you.

Nah, he punched that guy 'cause he screwed his fiancée.

You have to punch a dude who does that. You just have to.

We're still talking about my book.

His client had relations with his fiancée because Dr. Cooper didn't hide the client's story well enough in his writing.

And we are out of time, guys.

Time flies when you're having fun.

Tell you what-- I'll see you next week, bright and early.

So, tell all your friends.

Really good stuff today, guys.

8:30 start time-- don't forget.

Bye.

Bye.

See you later, man.

Learning and teaching-- that's what's happening here.

Yeah.

[Cellphone buzzing, chiming]

Oh. Popular.

[Chuckles]

Scarlett, you didn't revise your paper, by the way.

I'm going to.

Yeah, well, I'm gonna fail you if you don't.

[Buzzing, chiming continue]

What is this?

Let the student teach the teacher.

All right, give me the phone.

[Chuckling] Tinder?

Okay.

Scarlett.

Looking for love.

Give me the phone.

[Strained] Just give me the phone, Scarlett!

Jesus Christ.

Revise your paper, or I'm gonna fail you.

I'm gonna swipe you.

[Buzzing, chiming continue]

Jeremy.

No.

Double no-foam latte with the most miniscule dusting of cinnamon.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

That latte falls outside my psych department administrator purview.

[Buzzing, chiming continue]

What is--

So, Jeremy's been doing something funny.

I can't really hear about your funny Jeremy story right now.

It's not like "ha ha" funny.

I've got to work. No, you don't.

[Groans] What is--

Popular.

Yeah, it's notifying me about everything.

Turn off your notifications.

I-- can you do it for me?

You're pathetic.

Will you help pathetic me?

[Buzzing, chiming continue]

Jeremy.

Ugh. Okay, fine. Come in.

Sophie, this is the last time, okay?

Here what you're gonna do.

Mm-hmm?

Regarding Jeremy.

Yeah.

You are going to have to talk to him.

Oh, blah, blah, blah.

"Talk to each other."

Are you listening? You have to talk to him.

Yeah, I don't go for that new age crap.

Did you fix my phone yet?

Okay, so, Jeremy's been doing this weird thing where he's been reading the obituaries every day.

Every morning over his Rice Krispies, he's like, "Soph, cancer, cancer, cancer", heart disease, liver failure, canc--"

[laughs, gasps]

What?

Tinder?

Did you make it stop buzzing?

Apparently, you are quite matchable.

Look at all these likes.

Yeah. I'm looking for someone.

Yeah, I get that.

Remember that woman I was telling you about?

Yeah?

Um, it's her.

She's amazing.

You met her on Tinder?

No, no, no, I met her at a bar.

Oh, old-school.

Something happened to me when I was talking to her, and I've just have to see her again.

So, how does that explain the 137 potential matches in close proximity?

137?

Look-- there's Anna.

She has lovely teeth and would like to match with you.

Can you just make it stop buzzing?

Mm-hmm. It's a tough job navigating the interweb.

Okay, I got to get some food.

Get me a beef burrito.

Okay.

Jeremy.

Right.

Don't worry about it.

Everyone obsesses about death every once in a while.

I don't.

Okay.

Well, can you just fix my phone so I can find this woman and not die alone?

♪

[Telephone ringing]

She's adorable.

"He."

Hm?

"He."

He?

He.

A pretty boy's not such a bad thing.

It's not.

I was a very pretty boy.

Doubtful.

[Ringing continues]

Aunt Diane said she couldn't take me to a grown-man doctor.

A grown-man doctor?

She said she already interviewed this doctor about the baby.

Women-- you know, women have their docs.

Why don't-- a grown-man doc-- that's a good ID-- we should have a d*ck doctor. That's what we should have.

Okay. Come here.

Tell me that's not a little girl. That's--

No, he is not. He is a he.

Thank you for-- thanks. Thanks for telling me.

Hey, pal.

Hey, buster.

No. "Willoughby."

You okay?

You know why doctors make you wait, don't you?

Because they want you to be nervous.

Why would your doctor want you to be nervous?

Control.

Tchoooo.

Hmm.

Highlights.

Good magazine.

Are you-- they don't-- why do they--

Somebody circled all the hidden pictures in pen.

T-they-- put a sign up, please.

Do you work?

Yeah, I work.

[Telephone ringing]

What do you do?

I'm a horticulturist.

Aunt Diane says you sell pot.

Don't do dr*gs. dr*gs are a very bad thing.

Urologist.

What?

A d*ck doctor-- urologist.

Nurse: You guys, come on in. The doctor is ready to see you.

That's not really what I'm talking about.

What? That's what a urologist is.

I know, but that's not what I'm talk--

I'm talking about, like, a man doctor to look at-- you know, to examine your junk once a year to like, do a once-- or a comprehensive--

Do you need that?

You need a cock-tologist. That's what you need.

For the nasty stuff that's in the, you know, in the basement, you know?

Hey--

Where's the prof?

Your father is in his office.

Not the prof I'm talking about.

You know, Scarlett, it doesn't look good for the head of the department to have his daughter stalking his new star professor.

I don't think my dad would call professor Cooper a star.

I think the university would-- published, infamous.

I'll keep that in mind. Thanks.

Tell him I stopped by?

Okay, I won't.

Oh. Uh, do we have office hours?

No!

Yes.

She came by to see her father.

Yep-- my big daddy.

Harty would k*ll you.

I know.

Literally, he would k*ll you.

He is old school New England-- the kind with the horses and the shotguns and the beagles.

I know.

I'm just saying.

Did you get me a burrito?

Yes.

Also, while you were gone, I made you cuter.

Still angry, but cuter.

1970s cuter.

Well, I used a Low-Fi filter.

I don't know what that means.

[Gasps] You know what photo you should use?

What?

The one from the book jacket.

It's perfect, just like when I saw you on "Dr. Phil."

Do you remember what you said?

Yes.

"I will never be a teacher because I'm too busy...

...learning."

Learning.

Yeah, maybe I was lying.

You were all swagger.

Well, what am I now?

You're still arrogant, less swagger.

Well, is it better?

No, it's not. You need the swagger to justify...

Jeremy...

[Gasps]

...is suffering from thanatophobia.

Oh, my god.

It's an excessive fear of death.

You said everyone's afraid of death.

Freud said that thanatophobia is a manifestation of unresolved castration fears.

He's afraid someone's gonna cut off his wee-wee?

Not someone, Soph.

Not someone.

Carter: Well, you don't got a lot of choices.

You're either taking honey from a hive full or bees or--

No.

You know, I Di-- use-- I used a lotion down there.

It was from my mom's medicine cabinet.

Had, like, kind of a rose smell to it.

[Telephone ringing]

It was a bad idea.

It made the whole thing red-raw, so...

Why would you do that?

Well, don't tell me you don't have hairy palms?

Yeah, but it's not because of the lotion.

Jock itch?

I don't play sports.

Take gym at school?

Yeah.

Your balls sweat?

I guess.

Your balls sweat.

Nurse: Oh, and you missed one right here.

Do you shower after the gym?

No! Did you go to high school?

That's a good point. That's a good point.

You know, I'm-- I think there's a fungus among us, man.

You think it's jock itch?

Yes, I do.

Hang on.

[Sighs]

[Telephone ringing]

Kids, huh? [Chuckles]

Hoo! And their balls.

[Cellphone buzzes, bloops]

Right?

Oh, sweet tom Brady!

What the-- what the f--

Oh, my--

I sent you a pic of my--

Yes, I know. Are you trying to get me arrested?

What? No. Is it--

Don't they teach you about sexting at school?

No-- what? Is it jock itch or not?

This is exactly what I want to be doing right now.

Thank you very much.

Yeah, I want to be looking at pictures of my friend's nephew's, you know, funny junk.

Please, man. Come on.

Please.

[Sighs]

[Door opens]

[Door closes]

[Sighs]

Okay.

Okay, I--your father really should be here.

Um...

Here's what we're gonna do.

We're gonna get you some powder, okay?

We're gonna sprinkle it--

Well, y-you're gonna sprinkle it on the area, okay?

And then we're gonna figure out how to get you to shower at school, okay?

So it's nothing serious?

It is nothing serious. Delete the picture.

Thank god.

It's a heat rash, all right? It's a heat rash.

[Sighs]

But delete-- delete the picture, okay?

[Telephone ringing]

All right, come on. Let's go.

Where we going?

Duane Reade.

Thanks, man.

Oh, and later, uh, I'm gonna tell you what to do when you start your period.

♪

So, the budget for the gala is the same as last year.

Okay, great.

So, do you want to mix it up a bit or revisit what we did before?

Professor Harty really doesn't like change, but I think we should try to sneak in some.

Yeah, sure, sure. What'd you have in mind?

I enjoy miniature food.

Okay.

Little burgers, [high-pitched] tiny tacos, those itty-bitty cast-iron skillets that you serve things in.

"Tiny food."

[Telephone rings]

Sorry. Hang on.

[Sighs]

Hello?

Hi, professor Harty.

Yeah, I just need five minutes.

I am talking to our event planner for the--

Yes, I will tell Josie that you say hello.

Mm-hmm.

Yep. Five minutes.

Just remember-- change has to be subtle.

Got it. Small food, subtle changes.

Right, and I need to ask you a favor.

Yeah, sure.

I need to call you Josie.

I'm sorry?

Okay, my boss loved last year.

Last year was Josie.

You're not Josie.

I would have to do an interview. It would be a whole thing.

Oh, I see.

I wish you were Josie.

Right, but-- but I-I'm Natalie.

I know.

My boss.

Of course. Whatever works.

That works. You're Josie.

Good.

You need help?

Oh, no, I'm okay. Thanks.

Oh! sh*t on a stick!

[Whimpers]

You do need help.

In every which way.

Oh.

[Sobs]

Rough day?

I'm just so pregnant.

Oh.

It's like I'm the reverse Kim Kardashian, you know?

Like the ass in the front.

[Chuckles] I'm 4C. Just moved in.

Oh. 3C.

They're a cliché for a reason.

Laundry room pickles.

Mm-hmm.

[Chuckles]

Thank you.

There you go. All right.

Oh, hey, I'm Diane.

Tiffany.

Oh, no kidding?

No.

It's just, my neighbor has a thing for girls named Tiffany.

Really?

Yeah. You like pizza?

[Door opens]

Nope.

What?

Knock. You're gonna knock today.

You're not just gonna come in.

What?

Knock.

Knock?

Knock.

Okay.

Hey.

Hi.

I can't find her.

Yet.

Yeah, help me with that, will you?

Mm.

Oh, how did it go with Shadrach?

Great kid. I want to adopt him and his little funky junk.

Carter, look at the desperation on these selfies.

Look at her-- Matilda.

She wants to reach out and touch you, man.

You don't actually use Cuddlr, do you?

Platonic touching? It's amazing.

No, it's not. It's insane.

Matilda-- she's close. She's like a mile away.

Oh, man, could you ever imagine there were this many people desperate to connect?

Matilda says, "Just hugging." [Chuckles]

Carter... I think I might be one of these people.

You think?

Ever since college, you're always surprised to discover you're just a putz, like the rest of us.

Where are you going?

Matilda's gonna hug me in the park.

Hey, she responded to my profile.

She thinks she's gonna be hugging me.

Well, then I'll be a great you.

Hey. I brought over a thank-you pizza.

Hi.

And a new friend.

Oh, hi.

Hi.

Hi. I'm Tiffany, 4C.

Hey. I'm Coop.

Cooper, it's Tiffany, 4C.

Hey, Carter? [Clicks tongue]

Yes, I got to go get hugged.

Uh...

What?

You're a great kid. I hope your d*ck feels better.

Okay.

Really do, okay?

Well, can I get you guys--

Two words-- coconut oil.

It's down there.

Carter, could you-- Carter?

Yep.

How about a beer?

I'll take one.

I'd love one.

No--

Oh, no, thank you.

Not you, Rugrat.

Okay, let's see what I got.

[Bottles clink]

I don't have a lot to choose from.

Well, Tiffany in 4C, I think we just got set up.

So, you're saying you were honest with, uh...

Tiffany.

...Tiffany.

Yeah, but it was weird. It was like an aphrodisiac.

I literally said to her, "I'm sorry, Tiffany.

I think I may have found my soul mate," and it had no effect on her.

I had to kick her out of my apartment.

She was nice?

Yes.

Attractive?

Very.

An actual woman?

Ira, I'm committed to finding Natalie.

Don't you find it convenient that you're committed to a completely unavailable-- hell-- figment of a woman?

I'm sorry. Two sessions ago, you told me to find her.

Well, that was two sessions ago.

You didn't find her, so don't obsess.

Get real.

She is real. Natalie is real.

Natalie was a five-minute conversation in a bar.

She's a figment.

She is not. Ira, come on.

For a long time, I've been feeling like I'm just scraping myself up off the floor, and this is the first time that I feel something... real.

Kismet.

[Laughs]

What?

Kismet?

Please.

You're avoiding.

Look, it's been a year since Lisa left you.

Quit making excuses, Cooper.

Stop punishing yourself.

You think I'm punishing myself?

Attractive, nice woman actually physically in your apartment, and you push her out.

Well, Romeo was not built in a day.

Romeo k*lled himself.

[Groans]

Ira, where's your sense of romance?

You are so full of crap, your eyes are brown.

You don't have a romantic bone in your body.

I do now.

♪
♪ Let's stare at the wounded sky ♪
♪ And let's forget to say goodbye ♪
♪ Your smiling eyes look so surprised ♪
♪ When I tell you I love you ♪
♪ Let's stare at the wounded sky ♪
♪ And never have to say goodbye ♪
♪ Oh, I-I-I can't help but cry ♪
♪ When you say you love me, too ♪
♪ You gave me all your thoughts on ♪
♪ I'll keep them with me when you're gone ♪
♪ Show me all your favorite '90s songs ♪
♪ I guess I'll see you in a month ♪
♪ I wanna see you every day ♪
♪ Why is it so hard to watch you walk away? ♪
♪ Let's stare at the wounded sky ♪
♪ And let's forget to say goodbye ♪
♪ Your smiling eyes look so surprised ♪
♪ When I tell you I love you ♪
♪ Let's stare at the wounded sky ♪
♪ And never have to say goodbye ♪
♪ Oh, I-I-I can't help but cry ♪
♪ When you say you love me, too ♪
♪ I love the way you dance when you make that face ♪
♪ I can't help but laugh ♪
♪ I love the puns you make ♪
♪ The pictures you take ♪
♪ I love to wake up next to you ♪
♪ Let's stare at the wounded sky ♪
♪ And let's forget to say goodbye ♪
♪ Your smiling eyes look so surprised ♪
♪ When I tell you I love you ♪
♪ Let's stare at the wounded sky ♪
♪ And never have to say goodbye ♪
♪ Oh, I-I-I can't help but cry ♪
♪ When you say you love me, too ♪
♪ Do do do do-do do do do ♪
♪ Do do do do-do do do do ♪
♪ Do do do do-do do do do ♪
♪ Do do-do-do do ♪
♪ Do do do do-do do do do ♪
♪ Do do do do-do do do do ♪
♪ Do do do do-do do do do ♪