02x07 - Eda's Requiem

[bunniefuu]

[Eda] Luz needs a new coat.
King needs to be checked for fleas.

Am I missing anything?

[chuckles]

Oh, you've changed, Owl Lady.

It's worth it.

- [Luz] And three and four and five and six...
- [King] And weh and weh and weh

- and weh and weh.
- ...and seven and eight and nine and ten.

All right, King. What's the first thing you're
gonna do when you meet your dad?

And , !

Well, once we're done training,
I'm gonna move out of that closet, that's for sure.

Then I'm gonna ugly cry.
Hard!

Have you told Eda about
your decision to le...

Shh!
[window closes]

[King] I... I'm not ready yet.

I'm not sure
how she'll react.

[sighs]

Everyone's leaving, huh?

Even King.

I guess I'm no substitute
for the real thing.

Welp, nothing
like a good distraction.

[enchanting melody playing]

[gasps]

Has my magic returned?

[melody stops]
[thuds]

Oh. Guess not.

Stupid curse.

[title music]

Hoot.

- [reporter] And we're back live at the emperor's castle.
- Hmm?

In light of
Scooter Crane's retirement,

today's ceremony
will confirm Raine Whispers

as the next head
of the Bard Coven.

[Raine] Do I have to be on camera?

[Darius] For Titan's sake,
just say something.

Uh...

I am honored to work with Emperor Belos in preparation
for the Day of Uni-bee.

I mean, Uni-ly!

I mean... Uh... Oh, no.
This is going all wrong.

Get me outta here!

Just cut the feed.

How are you supposed to be
Head Bard with stage fright? [door opens]

I'm sorry, Luz.
It's okay, buddy.

Hey, Eda.
Got another backpack I can borrow?

This one got a little thrown-up in.

Closet.

So, why are you suddenly
so interested in flying?

Did you give up on returning
to the human realm?

I mean, I suppose you can
stay here a little longer.

Oh, no. I'm still going home,

but I keep running into
some setbacks.

Come on, little buddy.

You got portal info
that I need.

You want a carrot?

[chitters]
Does baby like carrots?

There we go.

It's okay. See?
You're safe here.

[chomps]
Fear not, maiden.

Hooty, the guardian owl of Ga'Hoot,
has protected you once more!

Ga'Hoot!

I was able to get
the mouse back safely,

but he needs to recover.

In the meantime,
this weekend is the Gland Prix!

[Luz] Hexside, Glandus
and St. Epiderm students race

to win glory and honor and...
Fame!

Winners also get an interview
with the Boiling Isles News!

Do you realize
what this means?

We're gonna enter
the competition

and get King on camera
to send a message to his dad!

Oh. That's... great.

But, uh... there's something I'd like
to talk to you about first.

You see, I think it's time
for me to le...

Leave... the talkin'
for later.

If you wanna win,
there's no time for talk.

You gotta go practice.
Now.

Wanna head back out while your tummy's empty?
Okay!

Let's go! [laughs]
[door closes]

[sighs]

[Eda] I just... don't wanna
hear him say it, you know?

I was finally getting used to
having people in the house, then whoosh!

Rug's ripped out
from underneath me.

Sure. I get it.
It's like every time you come in here, I think,

"Maybe she'll pay
her tab this time."

[slurps]

[demon hunter]
Hey! Back off!

Don't fret, citizens!
[grunts]

We are helping this wild witch
find her place in society. [sighs]

[demon hunter] No!
I don't want to join a coven!

Let me go!

- [Eda] Throw it on my tab, Kevin!
- [Kevin groans]

Let her go!

Back off, Owl Lady.

Yeah, no coven wants
a powerless witch. [groans]

How's that
for powerless?

[crowd]
Ooh!

[chord plays]

Huh?

[enchanting music playing]

Whoa!
[gasps]

[both exclaim]

[music continues]

Look at the emperor's lackeys!

Trying to, uh...

Do I really have
to say this?

We all agreed
on the script!

Trying to...
mute the music of our hearts?

[groans]

And weaken magic,
by forcing witches into covens against their will.

Blasphemy!

Blasphem-you!

See? You're a natural.

That's right,
Bonesborough.

[grunting]

- They take your magic.
- [scouts] Whoa!

They restrict your knowledge.

Oh!
Oh! Stop, stop!

They say they do it
in the name of "unity,"

but what they really want
is control!

You know what we say
to that, folks?

Shove off!

[scout] Stop!
No, not the trash! Oh, not the trash!

[groans]

Who are you "hewoes"?

We are the Bards
Against the Throne, aka...

Surrounded!
[ear muffs squeak]

Psst!

[horn blows]

[groans]
[squeaks]

End of the line, folks.

Word of advice...
Next time you put on a performance like that,

make sure you have
an exit strategy.

Thank you.
How can we ever repay you?

Well, you could let me join
your little team.

[all gasp]

Hey, I may not have magic,

but I am an agent of chaos.

Sorry. We're not
accepting new members.

Is that any way
to treat an old friend,

Raine Whispers?

So, the Head Witch
of the Bard Coven likes pretending to be a rebel.

Too bad they're not
very good at it.

Eda! You're embarrassing me
in front of my crew.

[all] Huh?

[sighs] Hey,
it's all right, everyone.

The Owl Lady
is an old friend.

Nice to see you again.

Is she gonna join
our group?

She doesn't seem like a good fit to me.

Actually, she's the one
that inspired me to make the group.

Huh?

[Raine]
It was a while ago.

Raine...
I know why you're really here.

I have no idea
what you're talking about.

[Eda] Uh-huh.

Who cares about
a stupid performance?

This is more fun.

Whatever you say.

See? You'd be a mess
without me.

[clears throat]

All right.
"Raine's Rhapsody."

[enchanting music playing]

You know, you can't run
from your fears forever,

which is why you've gotta
get the jump on them.

Give 'em a whack
right in the face.

[Raine] I thought you were
just joking around.

I only learned what it meant when I started teaching
for the Bard Coven.

The emperor prioritized
recruitment through force.

And anyone who refused
to fall in line disappeared.

Well, I wasn't going
to stand for that!

So I took matters
into my own hands.

I carefully moved up the ranks,

and I found people who wanted
to change things, like me.

And that's when we formed
the Bards Against the Throne, aka...

[together] The BATTs!
[hisses]

[footsteps]

Hey. If you've got
nothing to lose, we could use the help.

[grunting]

[grunts] Whew!

All right, King.
The Gland Prix is the day after tomorrow.

Are you ready?

I, uh, got the jitters.

[squeals] And I still haven't
been able to talk to Eda.

Don't worry.
She's just been busy this week.

You've always got
Uncle Hooty's shoulder to lean on.

You don't have
any shoulders!

Lean on me!

Eda, King's still waiting to talk to you.
Uh, maybe later.

O-Okay.
Well, maybe at the Gland Prix.

I'll be there.
I promise.

Stay away from me!
Let me be your emotional support.

[Eda] Well, there you have it.

Homemade maps
of every nook and cranny in the city.

Okay.
Here's the situation.

Emperor Belos wants
every wild witch in a coven before the Day of Unity.

He's trying to steal as much magic as possible.
We don't know why.

Right now we're just
focused on helping those he's captured.

And the next raids
take place here, here and here.

At the same time?
What do we do?

Don't worry, kids.
Mama's got a plan.

You're not our mom.

[Eda] As the first team is rounding
up witches on Hackson Road,

Amber will sneak in
and take him out.

[Amber] Ugh. Fine.

[enchanting music plays]

[yawns]

[both yawn]

[Eda] Before anyone calls
for help,

Derwin and Katya will
distract the second team

by Skinford Avenue.

[Derwin] That we can do.

[Amber] And... the captain?

[Eda] That's where
Raine comes in.

[Raine] As long as I don't
have to make any more speeches.

[Eda] And if everything
goes well,

I'll be guiding the escapees
outside Bonesborough.

Belos has less reach

outside the cities.

[Eda groans] I can't believe
it's already morning.

[Amber] I'm not tired yet.

Amber,
you've gotta calm down.

[all chuckle]

We did it!
Eda, you're amazing.

We actually helped people
this time.

[sighs]

[Eda] Rainstorm.

[chuckles]
Haven't heard that in a minute.

Oh, you've gotten so strong. It's incredible.
[chuckles]

But how'd you become Head Bard
with your stage fright?

I'm just that good.
What about you?

Do you still know
any Bard spells?

Well, you remember the curse.
It messes with my magic.

[gasps]

How'd you become the Owl Lady

with your stage fright?

All right. [sighs]
You asked for this.

[enchanting music plays]

[music stops]

[chuckles, snorts]
"Raine's Rhapsody."

More like "Eda's Requiem,"
am I right?

I-I'll leave the playing
to the professionals.

Call if you need me.
Bye, Mama Eda!

[crowd chattering]

[camera shutter clicks]

Eda, I'm so glad
you made it.

I, uh, would really like
to tell you something

before the race starts.

Well, if it's so important,

we can talk about it after the race...
when you win, okay?

Uh, yeah, yeah.
Okay.

Welcome, everyone,
to the Gland Prix.

[crowd cheers]

Contestants will fly
down the right arm to the Cubital Valley.

They use speed,
cunning and magic

to race to the checkpoint
and back to the finish line.

Winners get their names etched
on the Cup of Ephemeral Glory.

[groaning]
All victory is fleeting.

And an on-camera interview

seen by everyone watching
across the Isles!

On your marks.

Get set.

[screams]
[crowd cheers]

Go, baby! Go!
Which one is yours?

This is
so exhilarating.

[crowphone rings]

Raine?
We got a tip about another raid.

I know you're busy, but...

No, it's fine.
I'm on my way.

[grunts]

This should be the spot.

[chord plays]

[crashing]

Something isn't right.

[all scream]

[groaning, grunting]

That feels better.

[grunting]

Looks like
we missed a few.

[gasps] It's Head Witches
Eberwolf and Darius.

So, that means...

We fell for their trap.

[gasps]
[screams]

Ha-ha! St. Epiderm?
More like Stank Epiderm!

[screams]

Might wanna slow down
for that turn, Luz.

We're gonna crash!

[King screams]

[crowd cheers]

[gasps]

This place is disgusting.

Figure out which one's
the turncloak,

so we can leave.

[sniffing]

Uh-uh.

[sighs] Just my luck.

[all scream]

[both gasp]

[all scream, grunt]

No. No. Not again!

I was scheduled
for some me-time today,

so hand yourself over
before things get nasty.

[groans]
I know they can hear me.

I know you can hear me!

Eber,
help me out here.

[grunts]

I'm not going in there.
Aah!

What do you think
you're... [screams]

You'll regret that,
mutt.

[both gasp]

I am glad I remembered
how to do that.

Ew. Gross.

Eda, Belos's plans
are a lot more dangerous than I let on.

He's preparing some big spell
for the Day of Unity.

But he can't do it
without every head witch.

If we can take out
Darius and Eberwolf...

Say no more, Rainstorm.
What's the plan?

You say your curse
messes with magic.

I think I can make that work
in our favor.

[sniffing]

[gasps]

[enchanting music plays]
Ah.

Looks like our traitor
is a clever little songbird.

[squeals]

[angry grunt]

All right!
No more playing around!

[bell dings]

[grunting]

[growls]

[roars]

[grunting]

[enchanting music plays]

[music continues]

[chuckles]

[grunts]

There you are. Huh?

[screams]

It's working.
Keep playing.

[music continues]

Look. We may not
make it out ourselves.

But it'll stop the emperor,
right?

Then we play on.

Eda?

Do you have kids?

[music stops]

Uh, well,
they're not "mine" mine.

[sighs]
It doesn't matter.

They both have real families
to return to.

[enchanting music plays]

[music stops]

I don't know
what you're running from,

but a great witch
once told me

something about
punching fears in the face.

What I'm trying to say is,

don't give up so easily.

They probably need you
more than you realize.

We can find another way
to stop Belos,

together.

[screams]

Found you, songbird.

[screams]

[both grunt, groan]

[grunts]

Raine, don't.

Go. You know I can't
stand an audience.

[chord plays]

[groans]

Hello, Darius, Eber.

Raine Whispers.

You'll regret what you did to my cloak!
[hisses]

And your treachery.
Whatever.

[sobs]

[crowd cheering]
[gasps]

[sobs, sniffs]

[panting]

Luz of Hexside
and Ukla of Glandus

are barreling
towards the finish line.

[camera shutter clicks]
And there you have it!

Luz over Ukla!
[crowd cheers]

[gasps]

- For fifth place.
- Huh?

And now let's give
a hearty applause

to our actual winners.

[crowd cheers, applauds]
Hey, Eda.

You were flying like the dang wind.
What happened?

We were winning
for a while, but...

[groans] Luz...

King,
try to hold it in.

I can't.
King!

[King gags]

And then we crashed.
It's okay.

I'll just throw my message
into the garbage where it belongs.

No. This isn't over.

[beeps]

Eda, who's even
gonna watch this?

[Eda] No one watches crystal balls anymore.
It's all about streaming.

All right.

[clears throat]
Hi, Dad.

If you're out there
watching this, I, uh, wanna introduce myself.

I like cheesy foods
and conquering kingdoms.

Though I haven't conquered
any of my own yet.

But maybe you have,
and we can compare notes.

I'd love to meet ya.
We could do parent-kid stuff.

Toss a ball,
burn some cookies,

catch me going on
weird websites or something.

Also, I found this symbol
in the tower I hatched in.

Maybe you can teach me
to read it.

I live with my favorite human
and a cranky old witch.

[Eda] Hey!

But cranky or not,
she's the one who raised me.

Which is why I am legally
changing my name

to King Clawthorne!

[chuckles]

Surprise, Eda!
Now we're connected for life,

and there's nothing
you can do about it.

Is that what you wanted to tell me
this whole time?

And if you sign here,
it'll be official.

- [sobs, sniffs]
- [Luz] Eda, are you okay?

[Eda sobs]

[Luz on phone] Eda, if you keep doing that,
I'm gonna cry too.

Would you shut that off?
[sobbing continues]

We're supposed to be
tormenting Raine, not me.

[beeping]
[sobbing continues]

Why are you like this?
[splashes]

[gasps]

Leaving so soon?

I told you
we didn't need help,

so get that ugly thing
out of my face.

And tell Alador he's a hack
while you're at it.

Emperor Belos was rather upset
to learn that you had a hand

in the recent
raid incidents.

Guess I can look forward to
my own petrification, huh?

No. It'd be too much of a hassle
to find a replacement.

The emperor needs you alive and well
for the Day of Unity.

But until then, night-night.