02x13 - The Sounds That Make You Want to Cry

[bunniefuu]

You made it past all those barriers

to enter the castle of dreams?

Talk about rude.

Seriously, what is with you?

What do you want from me?!

For so long...

For so very long...

I have loved you...

and no one else.

Stop...

I love you.

Stop it.

I have loved only you for so, so long.

I said stop, damn it!

Both you and Echidna are insane!

I've had it! I've had it with you both!

I won't accept help from any of you!

I'll find a way to fix everything myself!

Isn't that good enough for you?!

So you're just going to
keep dying, starting over,

and making everyone cry? Really?

Must be nice to be you.

No matter how everyone else feels,

you can always make the excuse
that you're suffering the most.

Are you...

Are you saying I'm just pretending
to be some tragic hero?!

No, I'm not.

I'm saying that deciding you're the only
one who needs to suffer is cowardly.

That twisted thinking makes you
way more vile than any witch.

And above all...

It's really ungrateful to her.

Vile?

Ungrateful?

What the hell?!

You're the one who made me like this!

All the pain, all the suffering, all of
it... everything... only happens to me!

If I had done nothing,
would anything be different?!

Aren't I stuck with a
horrible future anyway?!

Who else but me would have done
all the things I've done?!

...urt.

Don't be hurt.

Don't suffer.

Don't look sad.

You have... the nerve to...

So... love...

So that's what it all comes down to?

You're that desperate for me to love you?!

No.

Love yourself more.

Wh...

What the hell did you just say?

Don't be hurt. Don't grieve.

Treasure yourself more.

You're the one who gave me the
ability to Return by Death!

I love you.

So I want you to love yourself,
and protect yourself.

{\an8}If I lost this ability
out of love for myself,

what would I even have left?!

There's nothing I can use but my own life!

As long as I get hurt more than
anyone else, so I can protect them,

no one else will ever
have to suffer at all!

It's not like anyone cares what
happens to a loser like me, right?!

No matter how bad I get beaten up,

as long as everyone else
makes it to the future...

As long as we can start tomorrow
without losing anyone... then...

Rem is gone.

If I had been stronger...

If I had put myself on the front lines

without worrying about what
might happen to me...

I could've prevented it.

I don't want...

to lose anyone else the way I lost Rem!

You're not a child.

Look at you... crying, wailing, trying to
handle everything on your own.

You're acting just like

a lonely little child.

Baru, you're crying?

Look how much someone made
you cry. You poor thing.

So who...

made you cry?

I love you.

Stop it...

It's because you gave me everything.

That's why I...

Stop it!

Baru?

Ah, that is indeed one option,
Natsuki Subaru.

His tongue...

You complete moron!

This'll be a piece of cake!

Stay out of the way, Typhon!

Baru made his own choice!

You stay out of the way, Nerva!

I will not allow self-harm, su1c1de,
or m*rder to happen in my presence!

Sekhmet...

Emotionally, I'm on the boy's side, too.

And... I'm on Typhon's side, too.

Why haven't you realized

that you should be included among
the ones you wish to save?

It should be so obvious...

What could you have possibly
seen in those two trials?

I'm expecting the best from you, son.

Take care.

I...

I wanted to call you a friend.

Why? Why?!

Why did you die so easily?

{\an8}Subaru-dono, you are...

No matter what I believe...

{\an8}I knew you couldn't be "that person."

No matter what I wish for, I...

Show me how awesome you can be, Subaru-kun.

Thank you, Subaru.

For saving me.

I don't want to die.

See?! That's how you really feel!

Is there...

any value in my life?

What can I do except
die and repeat everything?

Can I really believe...
that the people I like...

also... like me?

I allow it.

You are the one who saved me,

so I will allow you to be saved, too.

It is my wish for you

to be saved.

Minerva aside,

I'm more surprised by the
way you two just acted.

Stay out of this, Daph!

You know, Subarun made some
pretty big boasts to me.

So I'd love to see him at least
try to follow through on them.

That's an intriguing thought.

And you were the one who called him back
from the brink of death, weren't you,

Carmilla?

You even used Faceless Bride. Whatever for?

No... reason...

I just... think... l-love is important.

Even if he doesn't want to see it,

there is love there...

And I...

I can't stand to see it
taken and not returned.

Sekhmet and Typhon respected his wishes,

and Minerva healed him.

Daphne helped prolong his life,

and Carmilla used her Authority to make
him aware of the love he didn't see.

So while each of you may
have your own reasons,

you all wish to help Natsuki Subaru.

This truly is interesting.

Don't you agree?

Seriously... what is
the deal with all of you?

I can't understand or agree with almost
any of your reasons for backing me.

No wonder they call you witches.

Since you're back to vilifying us,

shall I assume you've
recovered your strength?

I don't even know what to do anymore.

Then let me ask you this, Natsuki Subaru.

If I lend you my assistance,

you can be assured that you will arrive at a
future in which you save those you want to save.

If you don't know what you should do,

would you extend your hand to me?

I will take you to the future
you desire, without fail.

You have my word.

Echidna... I'm afraid of getting hurt.

I hate hurting, suffering, and being sad.

I don't want to feel pain,

and I don't want to see terrible
things happen to anyone else.

I don't want to die.

So, since sacrifice is a prerequisite
to taking your hand...

I can't take it again.

If I might have any value to
them beyond my own death,

I'm going to look for it.

If I can find it, I have a feeling

I can repay them in some
way other than death.

That path is lined with thorns.

If you thought of your death as a tool,

your heart would be
all you needed to offer.

But to deny that and try to claim both
your own heart and other people's futures

would be exceedingly difficult,
and above all...

greedy.

It's true that you've saved
me time and time again.

No matter what you had
in mind, that part is true.

That poor, stupid Garfiel
fears the outside world.

To free him from his circumstances,
you'd have to break that spell.

Echidna?

Oh, I'm just being a sore, meddling loser.

I don't want you thinking all the
other witches were good at heart,

but only Echidna was evil to the very end.

It's still true that I am a girl,
and that I'm fond of you, after all.

You're all monsters
beyond my comprehension.

We'll never understand each other,
and I doubt I could ever like you.

But...

Thanks for being willing to let me die.

Thanks for not letting me die.

Thanks for letting me hear those
precious voices I needed to hear.

I do thank you for that.

I don't understand you.

But it's a fact that the Return by Death
power you gave me has saved me many times.

Is Return by Death one of the
options available to me?

If not relying on it too much is
what it takes to love myself...

I can't say that'll be easy.

But I'll try to like myself a
little more, like you said.

You'll be all right?

Yeah.

Compared to dying, it's nothing.

Don't fret all alone.

Fight alongside the people
who care about you.

Don't forget that there are
people who grieve when you die.

I...

And one day,

you must come...

to k*ll me.

I swear...

I'm going to save you.

The Sounds That Make You Want to Cry

The Sounds That Make You Want to Cry

It's you...

You're awake?

Otto?

This is...

I'd normally be inside.

Did you carry me out?

Patrasche did.

She started thrashing around,

and the moment I released
her from the carriage...

Wait...

Anyone who enters the graveyard without
the qualification is rejected.

Why would you try a crazy thing like that?

I would've come outside
as soon as I woke up.

Why'd you save me?

You really don't know why?

Of course. Yeah, you're right.

What? What did Patrasche say?

She said, "Don't make me say why."

You really don't know?

Now, listen...

Leaping to save someone when
you think they're in danger,

saving them regardless
of the risk to yourself,

and smiling when they wake up...

I believe the feelings
behind that are the same,

whether you're a human or a ground dragon.

You're beyond dense.
It must be nice to be you.

N-Natsuki-san?

{\an8}No, no... It's not what you think...

It's just... the timing...

I see. You actually like me, huh?

Never thought you'd be the
first one I learned that from.

Thanks, Patrasche.

Are you all right? What happened?

Were you worried? Wait,
do you like me, too?

Could you not say such gross things?!

I'm only thinking of what comes next!

Yeah, I know. We're friends, after all.

Natsuki-san?

Does this mean I passed the second trial?

Hey!

Damn it... What was...

It rejected me?

Did I lose my qualification? Why?

That nasty little...

{\an8}What happened? Is there anything I can...

There's something I need to do.

Take Patrasche back to the carriage.

But...

Please.

A way to leave the Sanctuary without
going through the graveyard?

That is quite the bold suggestion.

I do believe this might
not be the first time.

It's the first time we've discussed this.

It'd be pointless to even try to count

how many times we've
interrogated each other now.

It would seem you have
quite the history with me.

I've learned a lot of other stuff, too.

Like about the facility Ryuzu-san is in,

and that Garfiel is the Apostle of Greed.

Well, that is splendid indeed!

But to forego the graveyard
seems awfully cowardly.

Do you have a reason for such haste?

Of course not.

I just...

can't bear to watch Emilia keep
going in there and getting hurt.

That is precisely what you are for.

Surely you don't mean to say it would
pain you to undergo it for her?

That's...

Not the case? Truly?

If you truly love Emilia-sama,
it should be a simple task for you.

Emilia-sama should come first,
and yourself after.

Am I wrong?

I...

Don't forget that there are
people who grieve when you die.

I see you still have not
sharpened your resolve enough.

Just a little... Yes, I had
just a little bit of hope.

That maybe, just maybe,

I could see the future I desired...

But you have yet to even stand at
the starting line of your resolve.

The starting line... of my resolve?

I don't know what that means!
What do you think I...

{\an8}I expect you to possess

the will to carry out your objective,

even if it means trampling
on Emilia-sama's will.

Understand?

If you truly do it all
for Emilia-sama's sake,

then you must ignore
what Emilia-sama wants.

A child who dreams of a childish paradise

is not capable of the resolve necessary
to walk through the hell you must choose.

That's totally backwards, isn't it?!

If it's for Emilia...

There is life.

So long as there is life,
there is a future.

So long as there is a future,
there is hope.

So long as there is hope,
there is possibility.

So long as there is possibility,
people can be saved.

Am I wrong?

Nothing to say in response, I see.

How many more times must you disappoint me?

In that case, while you work
on sharpening your resolve,

let me press you on one more matter.

I believe you have already faced many of the
problems that arise within this Sanctuary,

but those problems are not
limited to the Sanctuary alone.

You mean the mansion? You know about...

Of course.

The order to have assassins
att*ck the mansion...

came from me personally, after all.

Wait... Wait. Hang on a second.

It was you?

I sent assassins to the mansion

to help sharpen your resolve.

My resolve?

Even with your Authority,
you cannot save both.

You must decide which
is more important to you.

Once you make that choice,
you can never take it back.

Eventually, you will be perfected...

as a being who can only
save one and no others.

You're seriously insane.

Yes,
indeed. I've been insane for a long time.

Ever since the moment I was enchanted
by those eyes 400 years ago,

I have been insane.

Four hundred years ago?

Natsuki Subaru-kun,
why aren't you insane yet?

To overcome circumstances that
one must be insane to face,

to walk the path of isolation,

the human heart is only a hindrance.

So I will force it upon you.

What...

are you trying to do?

Wait...

Please. Please forgive me.

It was... It was all my fault... so...

Raise your head, Subaru-kun.

Nothing is your faul...

{\an8}You're wrong!

I want to do what you said, but I can't.

I lost the qualification
to undergo the trial.

What?

Please! Setting assassins on
the mansion won't do any good!

No matter who dies, it won't...

So please...

No, I refuse.

In fact, I now see an even
greater need to do so.

If you truly wish it, Echidna will
surely restore your qualification.

That's the nature of
her greedy personality.

You can get the qualification back.
You can fix this.

Therefore, my actions will not change.

I will continue to corner you,
to sharpen your resolve...

until you are perfected.

Don't get conceited, Natsuki Subaru.

You're not the only one
who understands Echidna!

If... If you hate me, then make
me the only one you...

Hate you?

I could never hate you.

You are my hope.

The only ones who allow me
to feel any kind of hope

are you and Ram.

From the bottom of my heart,

I believe in you.

I will...

I will... never be like you.

I'm human.

I'll always... be human.

Damn it! Damn it!

What am I supposed to do?

What do I do?

What do I do? What do I do?

What do I do? What do I do?

What do I do? What do I do? What do I do?

What do I do? What do I do? What do I do?

What do I do?! What
do I do?! What do I do?!

Would you like me to tell
you what you should do?

Otto?

Yes, hello.

And good morning.

That's right. It's me.

Mor...

What are you doing here?

Let's put that aside for the moment.

We need to talk about you first.

You were deliriously muttering to yourself,
with a face like someone about to die.

Delirious?

Yes.

I see...

You always seem to find me when
I'm in the freakiest states.

I can't be a trader without my quick wit.

Sorry, but I don't have time
to cr*ck jokes with you.

I need to think, so right now...

You were at your wits' end, right?

And you want to know what you should do?

Just leave it to me.

Leave what to you?

Now, listen. This will take preparation.

Preparation?

Yes. First, take a long, deep breath.

Huh?

Quickly, now.

Stop trying

to put on a tough front
around your friends,

Natsuki Subaru!