03x05 - Look at Me

[bunniefuu]

MALE ANNOUNCER: Previously on "Casual"...

You're currently not working?

I'm dabbling
in the hospitality business.

If I put you on a budget,

your savings can get you
through the end of the year.

Okay, so this is the cereal aisle,

and it's just like Postmates,

except if you want a box,
you just grab one.

Hush. I'm multitasking.

Job search? Tell me!

It's all dumb, just dressed up
entry-level stuff.

Where are you getting this list?

Head hunter.

That sounds violent.

That's what work is,

sublimation of our violent
desires to hunt and f*ck.

Why would you lie to me
about the tattoo?

'Cause I'm a teenager.

If you want it removed,
you can earn the money yourself.

Fine.

Hello, hurried consumer.

Care to sign the green power initiative

and put alternative fuel
vehicles on the road?

No. You do not.

What does one do
in a storytelling class anyway?

We mine the experiences of our lives

to create a truthful
and engaging performance piece.

- Sounds hokey.
- Quarterlife crisis.

Mm! Midlife crisis.

Well, she looks like she's
having a midlife crisis.

But she's dressed like she's
having a quarterlife crisis.

And her boots are new,
so that's part of it.

How did you know I got 'em today?

Check your sole.

[both moaning]

Oh, no.

Absolutely not.

- No.
- Wait, wait, wait.

- She was pretty.
- Robot.

- [phone chimes]
- How many times a day

do you think the average person
gets rejected?

Guy or girl?

Uh, guy.

Single app or across all platforms?

Let's say all.

- Thousands.
- [phone rings]

Oh. Here he is.

Hello.

I like your necklace.

It's a Celtic charm.

Yeah, huh.

Looks like two trees f*cking.

[laughs]

The tree of life's about the connection
between all God's creations:

tree, animal, man, woman.

Well, I like it a lot.

What's your name?

Valerie.

Nice to meet you.

That was quick.

Got an interview.

Some new company in digital branding.

- Sounds promising.
- Wow.

Oh, yeah. Very promising.

What's going on there?
You working something?

No, just a little something.

- Mm, did you tip him?
- Yep.

Bad move. Now he thinks
you look down on him.

No, you... you know, what do you know?

A lot.

Mallory.

Go on, Mallory. [chuckles]

Thank you.

It's Valerie.

All right, democracy in action.
Listen. Thanks, Megan.

- You have yourself a nice day.
- Yeah.

Excuse me, sir. Are you re...

Sir. [stammers]

Do you ever think about maybe
shutting down your phone

and just tuning in
to the world around you?

Once.

Yeah, but then I realized I was
standing in a parking lot

and it got too real too fast

This is all a big joke to you, huh?

Well, they say laughter is
the best medicine for despair.

People are gonna sum up your
generation in one word...

- Scapegoat?
- Entitled.

You're asking people to sign
paper for money.

Okay? It's not exactly Standing Rock.

You know, fights need foot
soldiers too, huh?

And that includes skilled petitioners.

Skilled?

Anyone could do this job.

Yeah, almost anyone.

[gasps]

- f*ck.
- What do you think? Too much?

Uh, just depends on
what you were going for.

Eight hours of rigor mortis,

-inch Kn*fe wound, self-inflicted.

[gags, chokes]

- Then I think you nailed it.
- Dude, thanks.

Glad you approve.

I wouldn't say that.

No, in New York, no one gives
a sh*t about FX makeup.

That's crazy, right?

In a city full of monsters.

[groans]

Anyway, just happy to be in this
supportive community.

You ever seen
"Skeletons Fight For Flesh"?

Oh, it's the best!

They're making a sequel.

I'm out here for eight seconds,
and already I'm going in

for a meeting with the prop master.

It's like... [mimics head crunching]

Crazy, but awesome.

Wish me luck.

Oh! Also stoked this worked out,

'cause there's some, like,

some real weirdos
in the Airbnb community.

Can't be too careful, you know?

- Easy. You're gonna run into...
- I... yep.

Cool base.

[singing indistinctly]

Every car on the road is an opportunity.

It's a chance for us to
make a dent in climate change.

Aren't you just the cutest!

- If we can all just...
- What's her name?

Oh, Holly.

No way. That's my mom's name.

- Oh, really?
- Yeah, after Buddy Holly.

- I love Buddy Holly.
- Me too.

Hey, okay.

I know you've been
talking to Tracy here,

but would you mind
signing my petition sheet?

You know, I'm just trying to
prove to my mom that I can do this.

You know, and it would just mean
a lot to me.

Of course.

Good for you for taking the initiative.

Whoa, those are some cool shoes.

They're kind of like mine,
only yours are sparkly,

which makes them way cooler.

I'm jealous.

- Thank you. Really appreciate it.
- No problem.

- Thanks. Have a great day.
- Bye, Holly!

You little sh*t.

Oh, Tracy, come on.

This is bigger than you and me, right?

This is about the world.
It's about making a difference.

It's about the future.

- [laughs]
- [scoffs]

Wow, bikes always remind me of my dad.

He fell off his, and now he's
paralyzed from the waist down.

- Hey, will you sign this petition?
- Yeah.

Wow, that's a great shirt.

Hey, you ever think about how
we're selling oil to people

who hate our way of life
and probably want us dead?

Mm.

I mean, like, Arizona in August.

You can't even wear black.

That's LA in years
if we don't get to work.

I mean, look.

Is global warming a Chinese conspiracy?

I'm not a scientist.

But if you sign this, I get ,

and it'll help get rid
of my awful tattoo.

[all chattering indistinctly]

- Hey.
- Hey.

That was fun the other night.

Yeah, it was very fun.

We should hang again sometime.

Okay. Hello, everybody.

I confess.

Last week was tough, I know.

[laughs feebly]

But we gained an understanding

that it's not just words
that shape our stories.

It's our bodies.

Yeah? So how do we use that?

How do we take advantage of that?

First, we have to understand...

When are you free?

How about tomorrow night?

Tomorrow's good.

- JOANNA: Then we can work on...
- Cool.

JOANNA: Reflecting or subverting
those feelings.

The "Mad Men" stuff is over.

TV spots, pretty campaigns,
their reach is negligible.

Yeah, any brand who wants to
target consumers who matter,

they come to us.

The right influencer paired
with the right product

can generate millions of impressions

and, by extension, millions of sales.

Yeah, do you know how much
Kim Kardashian charges

for a sponsored Instagram post?

- I...
- $ , .

For one picture?

- We could get her $ .
- We will get her $ .

- Yeah.
- Okay.

And how would I fit in?

We want to grow beyond talent.

Packaging, content production,
even apps.

It's all on the horizon.

And as chief technology
officer, I would, what,

head up a development team?

Uh, yeah, eventually that's...
that's the hope.

Yeah, we're still in
our capital building phase.

Our IPO's another year or two
away, so...

The CTO is more of an IT professional.

Yeah.

So you want me to be the guy

who tells you how to restart
your computer?

- Oh, no.
- [both laughing]

No, no.

That's a stereotype.

IT's critical to a business like ours.

Yeah, well, that's why we
rebranded the position.

I mean, calling something
by a different name

doesn't change what it is.

- That's debatable.
- Is it?

Oh, look. You know, we get it.

It's a new role for you.
But you'd be getting in early.

Yeah, and there's a real
opportunity for growth

in a world you may be aging out of?

- Wow. Okay.
- I'm sorry.

It's just the people we meet your age,

they're not versed
in the newer languages:

Swift, Julia, Google Go.

But... but for all I know,
you're fluent in all of them.

- So think it over. Let us know.
- Yeah.

- I will.
- Cool.

- Thanks.
- Yeah, great.

- Thanks for coming in.
- Thank you.

[sighs]

Thanks.

Yeah, thanks.

- Oh, it's sliding.
- Yep, sliding. Okay.

Hey, there.

Got a minute to stick it
to the oligarchy?

What do you think these
signatures are for?

Clean energy initiatives.

- Like what?
- Uh, research, subsidies...

What kind of subsidies?

Fuel-efficient cars.

- $ billion worth?
- Uh-huh.

And who do you think benefits from that?

Everyone?

Who's paying you for these signatures?

People.

You don't think maybe the
people backing this initiative

have a less than philanthropic agenda?

[scoffs]

What do you know?

Nothing.

I'm just a concerned citizen
of the world...

like you.

It's ridiculous.
I didn't start a company

to argue semantics with Kim
Kardashian's social media pimps.

Do I command that little respect now?

It's demeaning.

Yes. Yes, it is. It's very demeaning.

- Hi, honey.
- [groans]

- How was harassing strangers?
- Fine.

Have you guys heard of
the Clean Renewables Institute?

- No.
- Nope.

It's the group behind my petition.

And some woman said that it was, like...

- [groans]
- Not what it...

What?

- Top-Knot wants to go out to dinner.
- The horror!

He said he wants to hang.
"Hang" means "hook up." Not eat.

- You can't do both?
- I can.

I just... I'm gonna have to get
half a portion of food

or, like, a side salad
so I look good naked

and the whole time
I'm gonna be thinking about

how hungry I am and how
I can't wait for him to finish

so I can hurry up and pick up a burrito.

- Ghost him.
- Straight to the shadow realm.

I can't.

He's in my class.

- [phone chimes]
- both: Oh, no.

Now I just want a burrito.

- Mm.
- _

I have a potentially terrible idea.

Hmm. You like alpacas.

Oh, yeah, I love alpacas.

How delightful.

Have you ever seen one?

I have a sweater.

Oh.

So when's the last time
you sang with someone?

Uh, when... that I... [laughs] What?

It's one of the questions.
"The New York Times"?

Okay. Oh, those...

Like, for me, I sing,

but mostly just alone in the shower.

Maybe you'll hear it.

Mm.

What's your perfect day?

[clicks tongue] Oh.

Um, I think it's... yeah, excuse me.

Hi. Yeah. Okay.

- Um...
- Have we decided?

- Let's see.
- We'll do the tasting menu.

Is that okay with you? All right?

- Well, that's a lot.
- And if you're interested in the soufflé,

I suggest you order now.
It takes minutes to prepare.

Ooh.

Love soufflé.

Let's do it. Let's do it.

Actually, um, I'd prefer the...
the cheese plate,

if that's all right with you, so...

f*ck the soufflé.

Perfect.

So cheese, huh?

- Mm-hmm.
- Where'd that start?

Ah, I can't really tell how hungry I am.

Do you do this a lot?

- App date?
- No, not recently.

I guess your profile just spoke to me.

Oh, I'm sure it had nothing
to do with the fact

that I was like feet away.

Well, don't you just love
life's little coincidences?

[laughs]

So what do you do?

- In life?
- In work.

- Do you know Snooger?
- Sure.

Yup, my baby.

- Oh, wow.
- That's me.

Founded it, cashed out,
and now here we are.

- Good for you.
- Never thought I'd be one of those...

dot-com guys, but there
are worse things, I guess.

- Yeah, there are.
- Yeah.

So you probably know, then,

why people keep coming back.

You know, why the app is so appealing.

Yeah, I have my theories.

Yeah, me too.

- Oh, yeah?
- Mm-hmm.

And they are?

I think it's the swipe.

You know, it's just that gesture.

- Yeah?
- There's no movement.

No time wasted. And it's so elegant,

it's like a conductor with a wand.

You know, and one swipe can
unlock a person in an instant.

Like a video game or something.

And it just opens up this world
of all these different possibilities

and all these energies, and it's...

It's pretty cool.

Sorry. I'm rambling.

What?

Nothing.

Oh, come on.

That was just very insightful.

And weirdly passionate.

Thank you.

You know, I've thought a lot about this.

Why go into it if you're
not gonna do the research?

I totally agree.

Yeah, I, um...

- You're ?
- Mm-hmm.

And you own a home.

Have a career.

That's... that's impressive.

I had help from my parents.

Which I used to be ashamed about,

but, you know, I realized that

you can't live your whole life
apologizing for something

that's out of your control.

It's what you do with it.

So now I just want to work
and give a little back

and find a guy that
has his sh*t together.

Yeah. I'll drink to that.

- Cheers.
- Cheers.

[chuckling]

You're so funny. That's so rare.

You don't meet many women who...

Who what?

You know what?

I just... I can't get
that soufflé out of my mind.

- Can we just put one in?
- Perfect.

Thank you. Oh, don't worry.

We'll still get the cheese plate.

[laughter]

- Yeah.
- That's crazy.

I know. Exes are awkward enough,

but add in a pregnancy
and it fucks with you.

Yeah, I get it.

But here's the craziest part.

My whole life, I've been
mortally afraid of this.

- The accidental pregnancy.
- Mm.

Being locked into something
without being prepared for it.

But when she told me it wasn't mine...

I don't know.

It kinda broke my heart.

Sorry. I know I'm not
supposed to say that.

- No, no, you can totally say that.
- I just don't want to be an old dad.

And if I keep f*cking around for
five more years, then what?

I wake up, and I'm in my s,

and my knees f*ckin' hurt,

and I wonder where my life went.

Yeah, I totally want a family too.

You know, but everywhere I look,

I see the same messaging.

Wait until you're older.

Don't sacrifice your dreams
to have a family.

Everyone says that to me.

But what if having a family is my dream?

Well then, I think that's
a wonderful dream.

Any religious affiliation?

Agnostic.

Outstanding warrants?

Not that I'm aware of.

Disease-free?

With quarterly checkups.

- Should we go back to my place?
- I'll call the car.

I'll be right back.

Excuse me.

- Oh, hey.
- He won't stop looking at me.

- We're gonna take off.
- Wait... what?

Yeah. She's amazing. What a night.

Alex, this guy is like raw plutonium

radiating poison into my skin

and breaking me down with his
toxic lack of self-awareness.

- [phone chimes]
- My Uber's here.

And it's surge pricing,

so I really don't want to make him wait.

Go have fun. Bye!

[sighs]

Mmm, my God, this soufflé is so good.

- You should try some.
- Nah. I'm good.

That was impressive.

Byron, if you keep ordering me drinks...

I'm gonna keep drinking 'em.

'Cause that's the kind of night
that I'm having.

Have a wonderful night.

What? Oh.

No, I paid when you
went to the bathroom.

Just a little trick I picked up.

Oh, wow.

- Yeah.
- Sneaky tricks.

Wow.

Well, that is very, very...

very thoughtful.

My pleasure.

So what do you say?

Do you have the energy
for one last stop?

Maybe a little nightcap at your place?

[both moaning]

Hey, hey.

Look at me.

Just look at me.

Yeah. Right here.

I'm gonna cum.

Will you cum with me?

Um... sure.

[grunts]

[panting]

Hi.

Hi.

- That was incredible, huh?
- Mm-hmm.

Great.

_

Goodnight, Byron.

Goodnight.

Move the hot tamale.

Now the blue sucker.

You'll get a candy avalanche.

Dumb.

I'll get us a table.

You again.

Oh, you remember me?

Can't forget you.

So what, your boyfriend afraid of me?

Um, well, he's my brother.

And yeah, probably.

All right, then.

I'll call you when it's ready.

- Okay.
- [phone dings]

_

[groans]

Hm?

Hey wrote, "Hey bb."

- Top-Knot?
- Mm-hmm.

- Ugh.
- When's your next class?

- Tonight.
- Yikes.

It is so bad.

I drank all the gin just to un-hear him,

and he would not stop talking.

You got to nip this in the bud.

- I mean, how?
- Text him.

Tell him you want to be friends.
Short and sweet.

Yeah, but I don't want to be friends.

I just want the benefits.

Well, then get 'em somewhere else.

- Trust me.
- How's my landlord?

- I'm seeing her again tonight.
- Ugh. Unbelievable.

Val, listen, she's incredible.

She's honest, driven...

knows exactly what she wants.

I mean, it's almost scary.

To reconnect with Emmy,
and then just like that,

meet someone who checks all the boxes?

I mean, what are the odds?

What are the odds?

- You're on tilt.
- What?

Mallory!

[Chuckles]

- Close enough.
- Yeah.

One day of work, huh?
That's all you had in you?

- Not now.
- I guess it's for the best.

When the world starts boiling
and it's too hot to move,

you'll be perfectly prepared.

Entitled Millennial.

f*ck you.

You're a f*cking fraud.

You don't give a sh*t about me.

The Clean Renewables Institute?

It's a group of rich old men
who want to sell natural gas.

Keep your voice down.

Why, are you afraid people
are gonna quit signing?

God, you're just a f*cking user,
like everyone else.

No, you know what?
You're worse than that.

Because you f*cking know better,
and you still sell this sh*t.

And you're right, the world
probably is gonna boil.

But at least you'll have enough money

to run your f*cking air conditioning.

Congratulations!

[exhales]

[light music]

♪ ♪

_

You all right?

I'm fine.

What was that about?

Nothing. It's just the stupid petition.

Okay.

God.

I'm a f*ck-up.

Even when I try to do good,
it turns bad.

At least you're trying.

That's what you say to someone who's
destined for failure.

Well, I'm always looking for interns.

Failures need not apply.

_

That was probably illegal, huh?

- Super illegal.
- [Both laughing]

[indistinct chatter, laughter]

So, how did you know?

I went to the shelter a couple times.

And the two times that we met,

we locked eyes,
and he's got the cutest...

Little face, and these human eyes,

and it was, um...

it was an instant connection.

You just know.

Yeah. I miss my dog.

- Carl.
- Aw.

Well, you should get another one.

I got the space.

You do.

You do.

I knew I'd love your place.

- My temple on the hill.
- Yeah.

[laughs]

So.

So...

how about you show me the rest of it?

Okay.

[Kool Blues "I Need You"]

MAN: ♪ I need you ♪

♪ Yeah, I need you ♪

♪ Don't you know ♪

♪ I need you ♪

♪ Whoo, I need you ♪

♪ Don't you know baby, I need you ♪

Hello. Welcome, everyone.

Okay.

So.

Who wants to go first?

Byron. Fantastic.

Please, take the stage.

[clears throat]

It started with Whitney Houston.

"The Greatest Love of All."

I'd heard that song a million times,

but I never really thought about it.

Nor did I think of it then.

For my thoughts were only of her.

Our first encounter.

It was brief,

but tonight's dinner was
to bring our spring to bloom.

I took her aboard a cuisine cruise

of seven courses, each more
lavish than the last.

But it wasn't enough.

I opened my heart, praised her wit...

But she toyed with me.

Like a cat with a rat,
she shunned my eyes

and plundered my soul's vessel.

At home, I lay awake,

tending to my shaken core.

Was I still Byron?

Or had she taken that from me too?

I soon realized the answer,

for I'd heard it earlier that night.

If I fail, if I succeed.

no matter what they take from me,

they can't take away my dignity.

And that is the greatest love of all.

Thank you.

[snorts, giggles]

Yes. We can clap.

[scattered applause]

Definitely clap.

So sorry, that was...

really, really, good.

Yeah. That was great.

[loud rock music]

Oh!

Hi! Hi! Hi, hi, hi.

- Hey.
- Hi.

- Hey, who's this?
- Oh, I'm Rae.

I'm... sorry, I'm Alex's Airbnb.

So that's it.

Dude! I got the job on the movie.

[cheers]

So, um, yeah, and I, uh...

I was thinking, what if
I stayed in the room

and rented in more of like
a longer-term situation?

- Uh...
- 'Cause I know money's tight.

You know, and you're looking for work,

so even if it's, you know,

till you find something, whatever,

it would really help me out.

- Right.
- You guys want drinks?

- No thanks.
- No.

WOMAN: She's cute. Nice meeting you.

I know. I'm sorry.

It's just... it's so crazy.

I don't understand.
She needs you right now?

Yeah. Yeah, you know, she's my boss.

This happens sometimes.

- I'm really sorry.
- Yeah, but it's...

it's : at night.

Yeah, it is.
And you know what? Oh, sh**t.

Okay, I just remembered that
I'm gonna be out of town

for the next two weeks

at this expo, so I'll just, um...

- I'll call you when I'm back.
- You can stop.

Look.

You're here, and I'm here.

Different timelines. That's all.

Is this because of Rae?

Because I can evict her. I can do that.

Just toss her ass right
back out on the street.

You know?

We can do the things.

- The things?
- Yeah.

You don't have a job.

Yeah. I'm sorry.

You need a ride?

No, I'm the late shift.

You're doing all right. Right?

Mm-hmm.

Don't forget to wear sunscreen, okay?

- Mm-hmm.
- Okay.

[reflective music]

♪ ♪

Mallory.

Hey, uh...

do you find me attractive?

I do.

Do you think you can have sex
with someone

you find attractive?

No strings attached?

- I can.
- Excellent.

You don't even know my name.

You don't know mine.

So...

HARPER: No, no, no, I...

just don't... don't do anything.

Just leave him there, and I...

no, I'm downstairs.
I'll be up in one second.

[Thao & The Get Down Stay Down
"Cool Yourself"]

Yeah, no. Just wait. Just wait.

♪ ♪

MAN: ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ I will love you like this now ♪

♪ You can recognize it later ♪

♪ I will love you like this now ♪

♪ You can recognize it later ♪

♪ But I would never blame you ♪

♪ If you would never stay here ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪