05x03 - Game Changers

Episode transcripts for the TV Show "Drunk History". Aired: July 2013 to August 2019.*
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"Drunk History" is presented by an inebriated narrator struggling to recount events from American history, while A-list talent perform historical reenactments.
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05x03 - Game Changers

Post by bunniefuu »

(Patriotic music)

Grand Wizzard Theodore is like...

(Imitates record scratching)

Oh, snap, I think I just
invented scratching.


(Imitates DJ scratching)

And Diana Ross was like,

♪ I can sing! ♪

And Berry Gordy was like,

that vocal range is supreme.

And Nichelle Nichols was like,

Captain, I have something
to communicate with you.


Live long and prosper.

I do this. I go there.

Yeah, that's the shocker.

(Laughs)

(Patriotic music)

♪♪

(Passionate string music)

♪♪

So you just pop it like this, yeah?

Yes.

(Grunts)

See how strong I am, Quest?

- (Cork pops)
- Ah! Check, please. Sorry.

- Yo, you just missed...
- Oh... sorry, sorry, sorry...

My day manager by,
like, seconds. (Laughs)

Party people in the place to be.

My name is Questlove,
and I'm here to tell you

about the birth of hip-hop culture.

Now, it's ,

and Clive Campbell, AKA Kool Herc,

born in Jamaica,

has come to New York to
find a better opportunity.


And he's like, yo,
I'm gonna be a big DJ.


So, he's playing soul music,

and there was always a part in that song

where they would literally
give the drummer some,


and that's called "the breakdown."

The breakdown.

So, soon as James Brown warns you

that we 'bout to give the drummer some,

suddenly, the place
would go out their mind.


Like... (Imitates drumming)

And then Kool Herc would
just be at the turn table,


like, yo, I got it.

I'm gonna play only the
best part of the song,


only the break, and then move on,

and then move on, and then move...

And then, his sister, Cindy Campbell,

is like, hey, Herc... no.

She was saying, hey, Clive,

I want you to DJ my back-to-school jam.

And Kool Herc is like, yep.

So, August , ,

at this particular party,

Kool Herc invented the
Merry-Go-Round theory.


First of all, he was
using two turntables,


which was unheard of back then.

And he's like, watch,

and he played those
seconds, the break.


And then, when that part was over,

he'd fade it and then
go to the next song,


using this other turntable.

And the party was
spinning on their heads,


spinning on their knees,
spinning on their backs,


spinning on their noses.

And Kool Herc is like... (Burps)

Sorry, I just feel like

the Michael Jackson
"Smooth Criminal" lean,

- when it was about to happen.
- (Laughs)

(Chuckles) Like that.

That's what happening.

Anyway, so, his... his claim
to fame was inventing hip-hop.

Pretty good invention.

And then, in ,

Joseph Saddler, AKA Grandmaster Flash,

would take a crayon

and mark the point
where the break starts.


And then one day, he was
just tired of doing that.


How can I take the Merry-Go-Round theory

and make it better?

And so, he goes to Radio Shack,

and says, I want a queuing system

that will allow me to hear a record

before the audience hears it.

How can I do it?

And they said, are you out your mind?

There's no way that you can do it.

And so, he's basically taking a razor

and slicing... (whooshes) the chords

and inserting the chords
into the back of the mixer.


And, you know, everyone's like,

no, no, no, you're gonna
destroy the system!


You're gonna destroy the system!

And he's like, no, I got this.

And with his scien...
scientific trickery,


he invented the queuing system.

Now, Flash is like,

I'm able to take a
four-bar drum break...


(Imitates drumming)

One, two, three, and extend it.

(Imitates drumming)

He has two copies of the same song.

(Imitates drumming)

Damn. I'm so...

dizzy right now, you just don't know.

- Are you okay?
- Yeah. Anyway...

So, Flash had an
apprentice named Mean Gene,


and Mean Gene had a little brother

named Theodore Livingston.

So, Mean Gene, Theodore,
and Mama Livingston,


all living in this apartment complex.

Now, there was one rule for
young Theodore Livingston,


and that rule was,

don't touch our equipment
when we're gone.


He's like, all right.

Five, four... door shuts... three.

(Imitates drumming)

Now, he's like, I'm years old,

but if it kills me, I'm
gonna be bigger than


Kool Herc and Grandmaster Flash.

But, uh, Mama Livingston,

she just told him,
yo, just keep it down.

And he's like, sorry, Mom.

But he, uh, started making a mixtape,

and he was loud.

(Imitates drumming)

And she bust in again.

I thought I told you to turn it down!

And he's... he puts his
hand on the turntable.


And he's like, ah, man,
I'm gonna get it now.


But, here's the thing,

his mixtape that he was recording

was still recording.

But she startled him so much

that he started shaking,

(Imitates record rumbling)

And then, he decides
to stop the tape. (Pops)

And he wanted to hear
the progress he did.


So, at the point where
she's yelling at him,


he had an epiphany.

He said, wait a minute,
you're meaning to tell me


when I put my three
fingers on this record,


and I do this...

(Brushing)

it makes this weird noise?

He's like, maybe it's a fluke,

so then he gets another record.

(Imitates record scratching)

He says, yo, this sounds crisp.

So I can do... I can go...

(Imitates record scratching)

Oh, snap, I think I just
invented scratching.


So, he had a Batman,

"Wait till they get
a load of me" moment.


(Chuckles)

So, he waits for this
perfect block party,


because he knew that he
had lightning in a bottle.


And Flash, Herc, every DJ is there.

I mean, he's... he has
to stand on a crate,


in order to reach the turntable.

That's how much of a kid he is.

And he... it's just a
moment full of tension.


He just looks... looks at the stylus,

and he goes...

(Imitates record scratching slowly)

(Scratching picks up tempo)

(Imitates drumming)

And the audience goes apeshit.

He doesn't just extend
it like Flash does,

like an extended loop.

He is like...

(Imitates drumming)

And people stop dancing,
and they just watch him.

(Imitates record scratching)

And they never... that's the first time

they ever heard scratching.

And Grandmaster Flash is looking like,

what the hell was that?

And Kool Herc is like,

what the hell was that?

And Grand Wizzard Theodore
felt elated and justified,


so he takes Kool Herc's
Merry-Go-Round theory,


and he takes Flash's Peek-A-Boo system

of hearing records ahead of time,

and then puts the perfect cherry on top,

precise cutting and scratching,

and that completes the final word

of hip-hop DJing.

The art of turntableism

is a beautiful invention.

Hm.

I mean...

the best babysitter
I ever had in my life

was my dad's turntable.

One, two, three, four.

(Record scratching, modulating)

(Dynamic percussive music)

♪♪

- This is called...
- Oh, that's nice.

Extending the b*at.

BOTH: One, two, three, four.

Mm.

(Record scratching)

Well, that was your quasi-lesson.

I love that.

This is math and science.

- It is.
- It also reminds me of this.

I'm gonna see if I... well,
I don't wanna school you,

- but, uh...
- School me.

Ta, ta, ti-ti, ta...

Ta, ti-ti...

What do you know about
ta and ti ti ta's?

Rest...

(Laughs)

You just spoke my language.

What's with that hat?

(Laughs)

This hat is...

White Women hat,

and it is my improv group,

and we are seven black gentlemen.

Okay.

It's fun.

Right. (Laughs)

Greetings.

I'm Carl Tart,

and today we're gonna talk about

the man, the myth, the legend,

Mr. Berry Gordy.

Our story begins in Detroit, Michigan.

And Berry Gordy got this
job at General Motors.


He would be on the assembly line,

being like, ooh, I feel
the revving of the engine.


It's, like, rhythmic.

(Imitates rhythmic revving)

Like, these... the sounds
that these cars are making,


it's like music to my ears.

I got to be a music producer.

It's hitting me, Derek.

It's okay.

- This liquor is hitting me now.
- (Chuckles)

Anyway, so, Berry Gordy
bought this house,


and he was so dope, he
called it Hitsville U.S.A.


- Hitsville.
- Hitsville.

He's like, this is where hits come from,

in Detroit, Motor Town,

or as I like to say it, Motown.

(Whispers) Motown.

Ooh, that's what we gotta call it.

- Mm-hm.
- Ooh, that sh*t is dope.

- You like that?
- (Chuckles)

So, in , all these people

from Mississippi and Alabama and Texas,

they go to Detroit,
where they can get a job


at an auto place.

You'd get off the bus and be like,

♪ Ooh, bah, doo, doo ♪

♪ Bah, doo, doo, bah,
bah, bah, bah, bah, boom ♪


And because of his experience at GM,

Berry was like, I'm gonna go get

some of these kids off the street,

and I'm gonna build an assembly line

of people that can sing, so here I go.

And he was like, yo...

Oh, sh*t, sorry.

You're all good.

It's in my ass now.

I know.

Get that ice cube out of your ass, Carl.

Get that ice cube out of your ass.

BOTH: Get that ice cube out of your ass.

(Laughter)

Anyway, after that,
Berry Gordy was like,


all right, I need some women singers.

Come on in here. Let me hear you sing.

And they were like...

♪ I can sing ♪

And he was like,

that vocal range is supreme.

I'm gonna call y'all The Supremes.

So, The Supremes had a lead singer.

Her name was Diana Ross.

And Berry Gordy was like, oh, sh*t,

that's the woman I wanna
be with right there.


I'm in love with you, Diana Ross.

I want us to be together.

And she was like, no, I'm
not in love with you back.


You not my type. You
ugly. I'm not into you.


And he was like, all right, that's fine,

we can keep this relationship working.

So a part of this assembly line

during the building
process of these artists.

And Berry Gordy was like,

I need Maxine Powell and Charlie Atkins,

the etiquette coach
and the dance teacher.


And Maxine was like,

I'm the most classy woman in the world.

I'm Maxine Powell.

Look how I hold my long cigarette.

Listen, white people got tight butts,

and it's the ' s.

Y'all need to have tight
butts like white people.


And so, they all
tightened their butts up,


and they squeezed them.

And Charlie Atkins was
like, yeah, tight butts,


but we also gotta
teach you how to dance.


A-five, six, seven, eight.

And they would do all this dope stuff.

And they became these superstars

across the world.

They go to London, tight butts.

America, tight butts.

Canada, tight butts.

So in the s, Berry "Gorda" get...

Berry "Gorda."

Abe Vigoda.

(Chuckles)

Berry Gordy was pushing
out all these artists.


And he'd be like, I got The Temptations,

I got The Supremes;

I got Marvin Gaye;

I got Martha Reeves and the Vandellas;

I got The Contours;

I got Stevie Wonder.

Stevie Wonder can't see sh*t,

but his music is dope.

And so from to ,

Motown had $ million in sales.

And they desegregated music.

Motown was like, we bringing
our black asses up in here.


Killin' the game. Motown, we here.

But Berry did love Diana Ross,

and he loved her so much
that he took her to Paris.


So they went up to the hotel,

and she was like, okay,
well, I'm wooed by this.


I'm a woman of my own means.

I'ma let you hit it.

I'ma let you smash. And
Berry was like, for real?


She was like, yes, I'm
gonna let you smash.


Let's get in the bed. And
Berry's getting into bed.


He has all these thoughts in his head,

and his head is like, this is
the best moment of my life.


This is bigger than
when I started Motown.


I'm about to smash Diana Ross.

I've been wanting to do
this for a long time.


But then, he was like,

I can't... I can't get it up.

I can't get it up. My
d*ck's not working.


And it's the ' s.
There's no Viagra yet.


And he looked at her.
He was like, Diana, no!


Not right now. My d*ck ain't hard.

And she was like, all right,
that's fine, all right?


I like you now,

so you ain't gotta get it up tonight.

But we in Paris... (Sniffs)

so let's go get some baguettes

and eat at the Moulin Rouge,

'cause those are Paris things, you see.


And they ended up smashing
for a bunch of years.

Wow.

But, eventually, in ,

Berry Gordy was like,
I'm done with this.


I can't run this record label no more.

None of... all my artists is gone.

Damn.

And then, somebody was like,

hey, I'll buy it for $ million.

And Berry Gordy was like, hell yeah.

And then, he went on to retire.

He's just an old ass man,

years old sitting on the beach,

buying stuff on Amazon.

R&B music binds cultures,

and I commend Berry
Gordy for starting that.


What he did was take these artists,

and he said, hey, this is
what people wanna hear.


Like, everybody likes rap.

Everybody likes R&B,

and Berry Gordy's the
father of all that stuff.


Berry Gordy, I'll cheers to that.

Berry Gordy...

I got nothing to cheers to.

(Chuckles)

♪♪

No. (Chuckles)

Live long and prosper.

All right, you're gonna teach me.

- You have all your fingers together...
- I do.

And then, you just go like this.

(Groans) Stay together.

Put them all together.

Okay.

And then, just...

I do this.

- I go there.
- No, that's...

that's the shocker. (Laughs)

Hi, I'm Ashley Nicole Black,

and today we're talking
about Nichelle Nichols.

So it's ,

and Nichelle Nichols guest stars

on an episode of a show
called "The Lieutenant,"


that's run by Gene Roddenberry.

And Gene Roddenberry was like,

you're amazing; you're so beautiful.

Do you wanna be on this new
show called "Star Trek"?


Here's my plan.

It's gonna be super utopian,

and black ladies can be bosses,

so this is exactly a really big deal.

So Nichelle Nichols is like,
that sounds chill as hell,


so let's do that show.

So they start filming "Star Trek,"

and Nichelle Nichols
plays Lieutenant Uhura,


who's the communications
officer, so she's like,


Captain, I have something
to communicate with you.


Boo-boo-boo-boo-boo.

And she has nails that are
way too long for space.


But also...

Nichelle Nichols doesn't
actually watch the show,

because back then, TV
came on at a certain time,


and she was at work during that time.

So at the end of the first season,

she's like, "Star Trek"
is cool, whatever.


I don't know if anybody watches it.

But my dream is to be on Broadway.

I wanna sing. I wanna dance.

And she goes to Gene Roddenberry,

and she's like, hey, I'm
gonna go to Broadway,


so I'm done Trekking. I'm done.

So, he tells her, like, please,

just, like, take the
weekend to think about it.


And she was like, whatever, bitch, fine.

So that weekend,

Nichelle Nichols goes
to an NAACP fundraiser,


and one of the organizers
comes up to her,


and is like, hey, there's a guy here,

and he's your biggest fan,

and he really wants to meet you.

And she's like, okay, cool, whatever.

Bring on the nerd.

And she sees her fan,

and he's like, your
show is the only show


that I allow my three little children

to stay up and watch.

We love "Star Trek." It's so good.

And she's like, excuse me,
are you Martin Luther King?


And he's like, yes, I
am Martin Luther King,


and I'm a Trekkie.

And she's like, f*ck me.

(Chuckles)

But it's real.

Martin Luther King loved "Star Trek."

And he's like,

you are the only black
woman on television


who doesn't play a servant.

You're the only person
out there providing hope


to black people that there's a future,

where maybe they won't
be seen as less than,


and they'll be seen as equals.

And she's like, wow, that's great,

except for I'm leaving.

I quit "Star Trek" this
week. I'm so sorry.


And he's like, no, you can't quit.

Do you realize that you are

the first black "women" who's...

black woman.

He wasn't drunk when he said it.

No, it's okay.

I was drunk.

But Martin Luther King
was like, if you leave,

this one image that children have

of a black woman as an equal

will just disappear from television.

And she's like, well,
f*ck, that's a lot.


That's, like, a lot.

That's a lot on my shoulders.

Can you chill? And he's like,

No, I'm Martin Luther
King. I have no chill.


And she was like, okay,
I'll think about it.


Stay tuned for more "Drunk History."

Do you know how the
first interracial kiss

on television happened?

So Nichelle Nichols goes into
Gene Roddenberry's office

and she's like, Gene,

I met Martin Luther King this weekend,

and he really likes your sh*t.

And he's like, oh, my God...

(Gasps) Someone understands
what I'm trying to do here.


She's like, oh, my
God, shut the f*ck up.


That's not the point.

The point is, this show

is going to advance racial equality.

I'll stay on your show.

So, you know, they're
filming "Star Wars."

- It's great.
- Is that true?

Oh, my God.

(Laughter)

Also very good.

So they're doing "Star Trek."

It's great. People love it.

At some point, Gene Roddenberry's like,

I know... we're gonna push the envelope.

We're gonna have the
first interracial kiss.


And William Shatner is like, hell yes.

And Nichelle Nichols is
like, whatever, fine.


But the network came down
and was like, whoa, hold on,


we can't have an interracial kiss on TV.

So William Shatner convinces them,

let's sh**t it both ways.

We'll sh**t it with the kiss first,

and then, we'll sh**t it without,

and you can decide what
you wanna do in editing.


So they sh**t the scene with the kiss,

and then, he's like, you
know what, I have a note.


Let's try it again. Let's try it again.

Let's do it one more time.

And they sh**t it over and over

and over again.

And they're like, William,
enough kissing, okay?


We only have time to
sh**t this one more time.


And he's like, okay, let's
just do one without the kiss.


So it isn't until the next day

that they watch the scene
and see that William Shatner


crosses his eyes to the camera.

And they're like, what the f*ck,

is this really happening?

And William Shatner was
like, I guess we either


have to air this interracial kiss

or not have a scene.

And that is how the
first interracial kiss


gets on television.

Wow.

And then, in ,
America lands on the Moon.


And everyone in America's
like, oh, my God,


we landed on the Moon. It's amazing.

And Nichelle was like, uh, hold up,

that's all white dudes.

What the f*ck, right?

So she gives this big speech,

and she's like, NASA,
get your sh*t together.


Can you please recruit
someone to be an astronaut


who's not a white dude?

And NASA's like, okay, cool,
but, like, can you do it?


'Cause we don't know anybody
who's not a white dude.


So Nichelle Nichols was like,

ugh, black ladies have to do everything.

So she travels around the country,

and she recruits people to be in NASA,

and she's like, hey, black people,

Asians, lady people, do
you wanna go to space?


And they're like, okay, cool.

And she recruited Sally Ride.

And then, she recruits Colonel Bluford.

He was the first black
dude to be in NASA.


How cool is that?

And then, she recruited Mae Jemison.

And she was like, hey,
you should apply for NASA.


And Mae Jemison is like, oh, my God,

you were on "Star Trek." I love you.

But she's like, pay attention.

So Nichelle Nichols was, like,

the first black lady to
go to space for fake,


and she recruited the first black lady

to go to space for real.

She literally integrated space.

Everybody who's really good at math,

or whatever you have to be good at

to be... go to NASA,

can do whatever they wanna do.

But we still need to prosper

if we're gonna live long.

Yeah. (Laughs)

Is this America right now?

- That's trying so hard, but...
- (Laughs) Yes.

But it can't get over...

But its ring finger
just can't deal with it.

(Patriotic music)

♪♪

♪♪
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