03x01 - Find Your Beach

[bunniefuu]

Previously on "Good Girls"...

I think you could be something.

He's making money off our backs.

Yeah, and with our asses
on the line.

Why don't you just tell me
what you're looking for.

- 50/50.
- Do we have a deal or not?

- Mm-hmm.
- Great.

- They're counterfeiters.
- The paper's all totally legit,

but the bills are all
in sequence.

How's it going with the sister?

They're after you, FBI.

- I love you.
- So what happens next?

Stan is in a jail cell.

Because of us.

I'm out on leave.

Can't even get my old job
back at the mall

6because they think I'm a felon.

Never again though, right?

Okay.

- What do you want?
- Her.

Are you gonna arrest me?

Thanks for the coffee.

- Oh, my God, and then what?
- Let's see how you do.

I made you something.

It's literally like
nail-polish remover,

hydrogen peroxide,
and bleach.

What's that thing
I always tell you

when you make a big ol' mess?

- That I gotta clean it up.
- All right, come on.

No more grown-up talk.

- That's your problem.
- Take care of it.

He's not my problem.

Shut your mouth, bitch,
okay, and just hand...

Go.

What do you say I call him now?

You still got odds.

We got a deal?

We can totally do this
without him.

We're free.

It's a shock when someone dies.

The lights go out.

One last breath.

That's it.

The end.

So quick.

But it stays with you.

Wait, what color is that?

- Bubble Gum Bellini.
- I wanted Kiss My Lips Pink.

But you said Bubble Gum Bellini.

This person that you knew,
or whatever...

they're just gone.

And it's so weird.

'Cause, like...

Did you ever know him at all?

- Yeah, I didn't.
- He just worked for my mom.

She said get one of those
sad cards.

- On the back wall.
- To the right.

Between "Bat Mitzvah"
and "Just Because."

That'll be 15 bucks.

All I got are ones.

Gracias.

Kiss My Ass Pink.

Mommy loves you.

Now be a good boy
and go night-night, okay?

- Oh, say goodnight to Au Jus.
- Good night, Au Jus.

Good night.

Love you.

- Why don't you go home?
- Uh, it's my turn.

I gotcha.

But you've been closing
every night.

Go have dinner
with your boyfriend.

- He doesn't eat on Tuesdays.
- He does intermittent fasting.

- What's wrong with this one?
- Serif on the S.

Lucy, it's perfect.

Well, just didn't
feel right, so...

Well, it will
all be here tomorrow.

Tomorrow we have that
quinceañera.

- Oh, my God.
- Go home.

Okay, I, I, uh...
Will do this at home.

- Good night.
- Good night!

It's freezing out here.

I'm about to slice up a horse
and crawl in "Revenant" style.

Where you gonna find a horse?

- Fine.
- A big dog.

- Or a hunting Kn*fe?
- At this hour?

It's a good thing
I'm also starving to death.

'Cause I'll use my teeth,
and I'll eat my way in.

You'd never
get through the rib cage.

Well, I wouldn't start there.

Oh, she's gonna eat
some horse ass.

Least I'd be warm
and full, bitch.

Let's do this.

Paper feels right.

What'd you do different
this time?

- Scrabble tiles in the dryer.
- On delicate?

Permanent press for thirty,
air fluff for ten.

- Hmm.
- It's got that glow now too.

One part Sassy Apricot,
two parts Creamsicle Sunset.

Mmm.

Mmm...

Is that a good "mmm"
or a bad "mmm"?

Yeah, nuh-uh.

What do you mean "yeah, nuh-uh?"

- This ain't gonna fly.
- Why not?

- Your Hamilton's whack.
- Wha...

- Just test it in the machine.
- Don't need to.

It would help if you could
pinpoint what exactly is whack

- so we could make adjustments.
- All right.

- Check it.
- First up.

Your boy's bouffant
is wildin' out.

- What?
- Where?

Hairline's off
about seventeen microns.

What program did you use
this time?

- You know...
- I don't know.

How do you not know?

It was Editor's Choice
in MacWorld.

And what's going on here?

Looks like you got an extra
shadow right there.

No, that... that is exactly
his little thingy.

You trippin'
if that's how you think

our founding father
wears his cravat.

These are microscopic
inconsistencies.

- It's close enough.
- Okay, boo.

Close enough'll get you
ten to twenty in the state pen.

Can you please just put it
in the machine?

- How long did this batch take?
- Three weeks.

How many ones you shred?

Denied.

- Rome wasn't built in a day.
- It burnt down in a night.

And I was like, Gwen, when
we're talking about my child,

you do not wanna see
my temper get away from me.

Mmm, what did she say?

That it was
a pre-existing condition.

- Hmm.
- But she would appeal

the decision
with the powers that be.

Babe, I got us covered
this month.

That's not the point, Stanley.

We shouldn't have
to pay for meds.

We pay for insurance.

Hey.

Hey, Krystal.

Hey, how do I heat
from frozen again?

Hit baked potato twice, and
you wanna stir it in between.

Thanks, Stanimal.

Little Man at dance class today.

Come on now.

Oh, and he says he hates hip hop

and wants to do tap next year.

We worked so hard
on that stanky leg.

- Is that your kid?
- Mm-hmm.

- That's Li'l Money right there.
- Aw.

- And that's Miss Sara.
- Aw, she looks like you.

And he looks like you.

Aw, I just want to
eat their little faces.

You know?

- So sweet, aww.
- Mm-hmm, yeah.

I wanna have five kids.

I hope they look like that.

Here you go, baby.

- Bye.
- See ya.

Bye.

Oh, don't forget,
we have to go to

that rummage sale
at the church on Saturday.

I told them that we would try...
Oops, you're right!

One more on baked potato.

Tried to tell you.

It's for our baby girl.

What do I hit for popcorn?

Popcorn.

- Guys, socks and shoes.
- We're going to the park.

- I'm sick of the park.
- My socks are dirty.

Mine too.

- Turn them inside out.
- We already did that.

- Hey, you're home early.
- Yeah, I snuck out on break.

I gotta get back.
Here.

- Another blue envelope came.
- Thanks, honey.

They're gonna take the house.

We just need to make a payment.

- It'll get 'em off our backs.
- I'll ask for some more hours.

Can you sell some more hot tubs?

- It's spas.
- Spas, sorry.

And coming up at five,

channel four's own
Kristi Dooling joins the FBI

on a dangerous raid,
as they continue their mission

to clean up g*ng activity
on the Eastside...

- You guys, now, come on.
- Mom!

- Hey!
- Now in the car.

I think they've officially
OD'd on the park.

Well...

it's free.

So he would cry every time
the ball hit his foot,

and I was like...

"Sweetie, it's okay.

It's soccer,
it's supposed to do that."

Ugh, he's my hero.

So there's an opening
on the team.

Oh, my God.

I could talk to Coach Freddy.

You don't have to do that.

It could be a good distraction.

How's he sleeping?

Last night,
he crawled in with me...

asking to call Daddy.

Poor thing.

Can Marcus have a juice box?

Papi, we've got our own
in the car.

Don't be silly.

Hey, you want
some animal crackers too?

What do we say to Jane's mommy?

- Thank you, Mrs. Boland.
- You're welcome.

You're too good to him.

No kid should be
without his Daddy.

It's one of those t*nk
K*llers, right?

You know it could land
even if it's missing a wing?

Here you go.

I just think it looks dope.

Think about what you want?

Pistons.

Season tickets, courtside.

So every fool you've put away

can see you up there
on the jumbotron?

You wouldn't make it
to halftime.

White sand beach.

Warm blue water.

Couple beers and a chair.

- The farther the better.
- Mm-hmm.

One last thing popped up.

Mom, your friend's here.

Hey you.

Hey... you.

Yeah, so I was in your hood
and thought I'd say what's up.

What's up?

Yeah, uh, sorry.
Do we know each other?

Uh.

Yeah, you crashed
into my car on the freeway,

and then we pulled over and...
Uh, exchanged information.

You know, in the back seat.

- Chris!
- Kevin.

- I'm out.
- Uh... love you.

Text me from Dad's.

Hey, guy, there's a statute
of limitations on booty calls.

You said,
"Let's do this again sometime."

Well, still I... I don't do
that kind of thing anymore.

Ah.

Okay, uh...

Would it be cool if I did
my own thing, and you watched?

- Daddy!
- What's up, Li'l Money!

Sup, buddy.

Ah, what's up, dude?

Ooh, you smell like Sweet Tarts.

It's a hazard of the job.

Did you see the president today?

He doesn't guard the president.

He guards the mayor.

Does he like candy?

They all do, son, they all do.

- Sup, baby.
- What happened to your face?

Oh, um, somebody

got a little handsy
with the mayor.

All right.

- Here.
- Hey.

They make me gag.

You have no idea
what we're doing to get those.

- Yeah, baby.
- Bottoms up.

She could be an undercover cop.

- She is not a cop.
- You don't know that.

She could be wearing a wire.

She doesn't even know
what we're gonna say.

You don't know that.

She just works
at a paper store, okay?

Noah "just" worked
at a grocery store.

- She has birds.
- How many?

- More than one.
- Great, so she's a nutcase.

Or worse.

What if she's a Mary Pat.

Well, we're not gonna
tell her what we're doing.

We didn't tell Mary Pat either.

You guys,
we don't have to do this, okay?

I talked to the dork
at the Apple Store,

and I can fix the design issues.

I haven't paid my mortgage
in four months.

And Stan's gonna have
to get on that pole.

I just need a little bit more
time, and I can fi...

You're not an artist.

None of us are.

She has a masters
in graphic design.

I could do that.

After you graduate
from high school?

And apply to college?

- And attend college?
- It's a vocation, okay?

You guys, you're gonna like her.

She's cool.

Looks like the g*ng's all here.

So, we wanted to talk to you

about doing some
custom work for us.

What's the project?

Casino night.

- For what?
- Just a local charity.

- What charity?
- Gambling addicts.

You want to do a casino
night for gambling addicts?

Hair of the dog.

Anyway.

We need you to design the money
that we'll bet with.

I was thinking something
simple, like tens.

Look, I'm really good
at what I do, and...

if it got into the wrong hands,
you know, it's kind of like...

counterfeit.

Oh, you guys.

I never even thought about that.

- Wow.
- Huh.

That did not even occur to me.

Oh, what if we put on the bill:

"There's more to life
than gambling."

They just...

wanna be treated like people.

They don't really wanna
be judged.

Oh, we could put, um, one of
those old time croupiers

with the wax mustache
and armband on it.

I think we're just gonna
stick with the president.

Hamilton wasn't a president.

- He was, actually.
- No, he wasn't, actually.

They all were, you know,
like Franklin and...

Also not a president.

Jesus, any presidents
make it onto our currency?

Washington, Lincoln,
Jefferson...

Okay.

What if...

We print it all
on different colored paper.

Then I'm good.

- Great!
- Great.

Okay.

Uh, hey, thank you though
for that, uh, heads up.

- Criminals.
- Can you even?

Yeah, I know, right?

Well.

What's wrong with it this time?

Not a damn thing.

You b*tches just leveled up.

I'ma keep this one.

- I'm so sorry.
- I had to dig.

Danny hid it in the back
of the closet.

He's probably scared
you're gonna sign him back up.

Right?

Uh, by the way, you never
told me Coach Freddy was hot.

Oh, you think we're watching
our kids at those games?

Man, thanks again
for working your magic.

I wish I could do more.

His Daddy's gonna be proud too.

What do you mean?

Well, if he shows his face
before the season's over.

I thought you said he was gone.

Well, then he'll pop back up
like he always does.

And the poor kid won't know
what hit him.

That's probably why
it didn't work out for us.

- I'm so sorry.
- Will you stop?

We're fine.

I think I have cleats too.

- Oh, hell no.
- What size is he?

I'm not gonna tell you.

Why are you blocking the door?

Move, move.

I can't keep this in my trunk.

- Mine doesn't even open, so.
- My car almost got towed.

- Hey.
- Yo.

- This is my...
- I'm Rhea.

Mrs. Boland,
I made this for you.

Thank you.

I m*rder*d the kid's dad,
all right?

The least I could do...

is get him
into intramural sports.

You plunged into
the way deep end of the pool

on this one, sis.

It's not gonna bring him back.

- I don't wanna bring him back.
- Then what's the point?

Maybe I can make their lives
a little bit better.

- By lying?
- By helping.

You know how you help the
family of the guy you ended?

Yeah, you get a teardrop
tattoo and you call it a day.

You do nothing.

You guys don't know
what it's like, okay?

Hey, I sh*t a guy too.

I mean...

in the foot.

I'm just saying,
kid lost a father.

Your guy lost a toe.

Okay, you know what, don't
lose your chicken over it.

- What does that even mean?
- You know what it means.

I literally don't know
what that means.

Exactly what it sounds like.

It's like "having a cow,"
ya know?

Then say "having a cow."

Well, a cow is like
totally chill,

so you're not gonna just lose it

'cause it's
just gonna stand there,

and a chicken is like
running around crazy,

know what I'm saying?

No, I don't know
what you're saying.

Well, that's your problem.

She's so weird.

- Oh, uh, we're closing.
- I just need a card.

I got it.

What's the occasion?

Thinking of you.

Right this way.

- How ya been?
- Busy.

Why don't you take
that vacation?

Well, that's the thing
about this gig.

Just when you think you're
finished something new pops up.

There's funny, religious, dirty.

Still part time?

I had to take on
a few more hours.

It's not easy making
an honest living.

You know, maybe a card's
not enough.

We have gag gifts up front.

Nah, I think I just need
to make an effort, you know?

Drop in on people more often.

- Tiny hands, rosé gummies...
- I think he's good.

- The travel straw?
- All set, Lucy.

Be good, okay?

I hate a pop-by.

It's always when
I take my face off.

The worst part is you never
know when they're gonna leave.

Or come back.

Maybe the man
just needed a greeting card.

Throw it on.

Mortgage.

Credit card.

Hopes and dreams.

- That breakfast?
- Appetizer.

Wash it down with some juice,
would you?

Who was that guy?

- Nobody.
- Chris.

- Kevin.
- Whatever.

Is he like your new Noah?

No.

Good, 'cause that
whole thing kinda sucked.

Yeah, well, no more Noahs, okay?

No more Chrises or Kevins.

No more Brad, Brians,
no Diegos...

- Gregs?
- Definitely no Gregs.

I am done with Gregs.

You know, you change
the name, they're all the same.

Okay.

They mess with your head,
and then they ghost.

- I mean, who needs it?
- Not you.

- Not me.
- Have some bread.

You know why?
I am a fierce, independent,

super fly, bossed up,

- weapons grade...
- Llama.

Wait what?

The ones at the zoo
that eat from your hand.

The fuzzy camels?

Remember I was like,
"They love me,"

and you were like, "Nah, that's
just 'cause you have kibble."

- "They come up to anyone."
- Yeah, but how's that me?

It's just like you were
saying, it's like,

anyone who shows you
a little affection,

next thing you know you're
being shaved for a sweater.

That is not exactly...

what I was saying.

Wanna make mac and cheese
for breakfast?

- Just do it.
- Don't think about it.

Can I get it?

Look before you open.

- I'm seriously gonna barf.
- Stop.

Hi, you must be
Stan's little guy.

Hey.
Hey, Ruthie.

- Ruby.
- Oh.

As long as we're doing names,
I'm actually Diane.

Is Stan home?

No, he's, uh... Running errands.

Oh, okay, I just wanted to
say thanks for having my back

in the champagne room.

There's all sorts of goodies
in there,

and lots of little treats
for the kids too.

What's a champagne room?

Uh, that's where
the mayor celebrates.

Mayor, athletes, cops, dads.

Uh-huh, yeah, um.

Can you take him
to the kitchen, please?

- Come on.
- And take your pill.

They make me choke.

Oh, you know what that is,
honey?

That's your gag reflex,
and you can totally fix that.

You just want to completely
relax the "fur-angul" muscle,

- right here under the jaw.
- Pharyngeal.

You feel it?

Then you wanna open up
your throat really wide,

and stick the pill,
on the back of your tongue.

You won't even feel
that sucker go down.

Now, it's gonna take some
practice, for sure,

and at first,
it's gonna feel like

that thing is jammed way too
far back in your mouth,

but if you just close
your eyes, let it happen,

before you know it, girl,
you can swallow anything.

Then take your ass to Red
Lobster and bring her back.

She's just not answering,
Mrs. Hill, if you'd like to...

I'm not talking to anybody else.

Gwen already knows
my daughter's situation.

Please hold.

- Hi, Ruby.
- How was the popcorn shrimp?

I get the admiral's platter.

You know that's not why
I'm calling, Gwen.

Your appeal was denied, so...

We'll only cover the medicine

in case of an emergency.

She takes the meds
to prevent an emergency.

What am I supposed to do, call
you when her kidney explodes?

I understand your frustration.

- Oh, you do?
- So, you have a sick kid too.

And your husband works
a disgusting, humiliating job

that demeans you
as a woman and a mother.

All to pay for something that

anybody on planet Earth
would expect to be covered.

I've never been married.

'Kay, this is how
it's gonna go down, Gwen.

You're gonna appeal my appeal,
and if that doesn't work,

you're gonna appeal that appeal.

And when we're done appealing...

They're shutting down
our division.

What does that mean?

My department's going
to Sri Lanka.

That's a big commute, Gwen.

My last day is Friday.

Yeesh, that's quick.

Yeah.

What are you gonna do?

I'm gonna move back home.

At least you have family.

- Yeah, it'll be tight.
- My grandma's there too.

Grannies make everything better.

She's in my old room.

I'll probably just
sleep on the floor.

Well, they say
it's really good for you back.

Yeah?

It's never been the same
since the accident.

Okay, you kn... uh.

- I'm rooting for you, G.
- Thank you.

Yeah, you're gonna
get through this.

I'll make sure the folks in
Sri Lanka know about your da...

All right.

I already told you three.

- Please!
- Are we gonna have to move?

Can we paint our room purple?

I'll ask Daddy.

Night.

- Goodnight.
- Goodnight, mama.

They were a gift.

- They don't fit.
- Well, he'll grow into them.

I'm gonna have to dedicate
a wing of my house to you.

You don't have a wing.

- Fine, a statue?
- A plaque?

So weird.

I don't want any
of your stuff, okay?

I just want a friend.

Well, it's either you
or the county sheriff.

What are you talking about?

Nothing.

Nothing.
We're downsizing.

By choice?

Do you want some more wine?

What's going on?

We're just a little behind
on our mortgage.

Stop.
I'll be fine.

I'm sorry, it's just...
All this time,

I thought you were
so put together and perfect,

- Oh, believe me...
- And you think I'm this poor,

- sad, single mom.
- I do not.

I would never.

Now, you get to see
how it feels.

How much?

What?

You can pay me back.

Absolutely not.

Marcus' dad, he sets us up.

What if he doesn't come back?

Then he'll send the money.

I'm not taking your money.

How much?

Unfortunately, sometimes
I can't bottle my emotions.

And when it comes to someone
I can trust, I do, I open up.

Hey, baby.

Hey.

Stanimal.

Uh.

That better not be
the new season.

It certainly is.

What episode?

Four.

Wow.

You just gonna
go around my back like that?

You're gone all night.

- Okay.
- All right, I see.

There's a new crew this season.

You want me to quit, I'll quit.

- And do what?
- p*rn?

What else pays that kinda cash?

Well, clearly you have
a problem with it.

Everyone's got problems
they have to live with.

Not just me.

Hm.

Wh...

What's, uh, Hannah's
baggage this season?

- She's down a stew.
- Don't tell me that.

You just asked, and
you know it's always something.

Ah, nope, nope,
La, la, la, la, la, la, la.

Be tellin' me stuff.

You remember the last time,
Conrad, he... he got all crazy.

South Dakota originated
a dish called chislic.

- Hard work is easy.
- Helping p...

- The thing about...
- Just fill the resev...

- That's why...
- Whether you're expecting

out-of-town guests,
or just a drop-by

from neighborhood friends,

proudly serve Wisconsin cheese.

Ugh.

Open wide,
time to brush your teeth!

Ah!

I'm gonna ask you guys
something,

and I want you to be honest.

Remember last winter when we saw

that Celica slam
into the pickup truck on I94?

Uh-huh.

And the minivan couldn't stop
and smashed into the Celica?

Right.

And the semi went sideways,
took out the SUV,

crashed into all of 'em,
and caught on fire.

Is that my life?

Which vehicle are you
in this scenario?

Hey.

Whoa.
Purple.

If we have to sell the house,

I don't know if purple
is the best idea.

- Dean, I paid it.
- Wait, all of it?

No, the interest
and the penalties.

- How'd you do that?
- A friend.

Okay, can we not use
the phrase "a friend" anymore.

Not that friend, you know,
like a mom friend.

- Oh, yeah.
- Yeah, obviously.

Sorry, that was
the trigger, it...

- Okay, I'm sorry.
- All right.

Remember Kenny's video game
with the n*zi zombies?

He's dead.

Right, but what if
he reanimates?

I don't know,
I think we could take him

'cause I'm guessing
he's mostly skull.

He's a skull and tats.

So it looks like
your room and incidentals

- are all covered.
- Awesome, thank you, Angela.

How am I doing
on loyalty points?

After this day,
you are officially gold status.

- Congratulations.
- Neat.

So any fun plans
for the rest of your day?

Nah, nah, just some...

business.

Well, we hope to see you
again soon, Mr. Kowalski.

- You too.
- Thank you, Angela.

Bye.