01x07 - My Way

[bunniefuu]

My God, who are you?
What do you want?

Stay away, don't come near me.

Please.

Fine. That was...
That was really, really great.

Do you want me to do
the scene on page now?

Actually, we...
we cut that scene, right?

But if you could do me a favor,
would you just?

Try the scream again.
You know, just the scream.

But this time, don't hold back.
Don't inhibit yourself. Just let go.

Whenever you're ready.

- Good morning.
- Well, it's about time.

- Where were you last night?
- It was a dark night of the soul.

- I was wandering the streets.
- This is LA, Billy. Nobody wanders.

You know, most people,
even diehard caffeine freaks,

use the same cup.
They just rinse it out, and refill it.

The paper went under, my column with it.

Once again,
I've been reduced to relative anonymity.

Oh, no.

I don't understand. How does
a free paper go out of business?

Lack of advertising. What's going on?
Something looks different here.

I got up early and cleaned.
This place was disgusting.

- Oh, no, where is it?
- Where's what?

My notes. My new short story.

I was at Luna having a cappuccino.
I had this fantastic idea.

I wrote it down on a cocktail napkin.

Oh, Billy...

It just looked
like doodles or something.

You didn't. No, you wouldn't.
Oh, Alison...

- This was work in progress.
- It was a fire hazard.

If you didn't leave stuff,
it wouldn't happen.

You don't see me touching your stuff,
your magazines: Elle. LA Style.

They're taking over the bathroom!

- I think they're breeding in there!
- I don't have time for this.

Go ahead, just walk away. Anything but
admit that you're wrong and I'm right.

Tell them I'm on my way.

Tell them yourself.

Hi, this is Alison. No one
can come to the phone right now,

so please leave your name and number
after the beep, thanks.

Hi, Billy, it's Mom.
Hope you haven't forgotten,

Palm Springs this weekend.
Dad's birthday.

We're expecting you and Alison
around six. Bye, darling.

Why'd you move the bed?

Trying to figure out where to put
the crib. We've got to start planning.

Get this out of the way.
Oh, no, no, you don't.

Michael, I'm not that fragile.

Just take this and move it.

All right, get a little space over here.

Then all we have to do is squeeze
in the crib right over there,

if it's not too big, OK?

Oh, honey. Honey, are you OK?

No, it's fine, honey.
It's just my ankle.

- Easy!
- Let me get your shoe...

It's fine. No, it's fine,
it's just my ankle.

Let's get this looked at.
I'm gonna take you, come on.

I'm taking you to the hospital.
No arguments, Dr Mancini, let's go.

All right, let's go slow, OK?

It's feeling better,
it's gonna be OK.

D & D. Please hold.
D & D. One moment, please.

Yes? I'll see that he gets it.
Thank you. D & D.

Oh, Billy.
I'm sorry. Please hold.

It's one of those spontaneous,
off-the-cuff things.

This means you want something
or you've done something.

- I just wanted to apologize.
- D & D.

I'll connect you to his assistant.

Thank you for waiting.
One moment, please.

- Billy, I'm so busy.
- I just wanted to apologize,

- and I knew roses were your favorite.
- These are carnations.

Slow morning in the cab.

I was a bonehead this morning
and I wanted to make it up to you.

The flowers are nice.
Thank you. You are forgiven.

So, you wanna go to Palm Springs
this weekend?

- What?
- Palm Springs. Desert.

- You ever been there?
- No. D & D.

Of course I'll take a message,
go ahead.

My parents rent this condo.
It's my dad's th birthday,

and they're having this party.

My sisters are gonna be there, my mom.
Not as big a deal as it sounds,

but they want me to bring a friend.

So, friend, what do you say?

OK, boys, here you go.

- Hey, that's not yours!
- It is now.

- How'd the audition go?
- Remind me never to tell you

- when I'm auditioning again.
- That good, huh?

Part of the job, isn't it,
dealing with rejection?

Yeah, I think
that's the only part I got down.

When you come out here to make it,

everybody knows the odds
are one in a million.

But I think
I got something special, Jake.

- Yeah? So do I.
- What?

- Well, you're beautiful.
- Yeah, but everybody's beautiful.

I mean, if that's all I got,
I might as well just quit now.

- Hey, Sandy. Jake, what's up?
- Hi, Rhonda.

- I take it we didn't get any calls?
- Nope, sorry, no calls.

That's the worst part.
They only call to tell you

if you got the part. If you don't,
you're not worth the trouble.

Actually, there was a call,
a message on the machine.

- A woman. Feldstein? Feld...
- Feldman?

You got the part!

- Congratulations, Sandy!
- Congratulations.

- Sure they know I'm coming?
- Of course, they're dying to meet you.

- Why? What've you told them?
- Nothing really.

OK, it's four two's and one C.

Well, this is C.

- There's something I gotta tell you.
- What?

Well, my sisters,
they're not gonna be here.

You said...

They don't get along
with my dad anymore, so...

It's just us?
Billy, why didn't you tell me?

- Well, I figured you might not come.
- You're right. I might not have come.

I mean, my God,
I thought there'd be more people,

and it would take
some of the pressure off.

I'm not good with families, Billy.
I can barely handle my own.

It's just us?

- What else?
- Nothing.

Billy!

- Billy.
- Well, it's like this.

See, my parents,
I told them you're my girlfriend.

Your what?

Good to see you.

- This must be Alison.
- Hi.

Welcome, welcome. Come on in.

- Please, come in.
- Thanks.

Rhonda.

Rhonda!

Yeah?

I've gotta concentrate on this script.
Can't you use headphones?

No. I'm trying to pick out
some new music for my class.

Can't it wait? I've only got two days
to learn my lines.

- Read by the pool.
- Please. I'm nervous about this,

- and I've got to concentrate.
- OK. I'll do this later.

Guess how many lines I have.

- I give up.
- Eight. And three screams.

- Doesn't sound like much, I know.
- No, no, it's a start.

Maybe one day I'll look back on this
and think this little part

- was what got my career going.
- I hope you're right.

I'll be able to live out
my secret fantasy.

Which is?

To go to my high school reunion...
famous.

- Sandy, everybody has that fantasy.
- I know what you mean.

No, wait. I'm expecting a call
from the office.

- They're gonna send new pages.
- We've got call waiting.

You don't answer quick
and the person hangs up.

- I think I can handle it.
- I'll have to get my own line.

- Fine. I'll make my call later.
- Rhonda.

Everything's happening so fast.
You've just gotta stick by me here.

Well, I hope you remember that when
you're accepting your Academy Award.

- Where are you going?
- Outside.

You need your space.

- We've heard so much about you.
- You have?

I've been asking Billy for weeks,
when am I gotta meet this girl?

It all happened so fast.
We're so happy to finally meet you.

It's really not what you think.

Well, don't worry about what we think.
Just relax and have a nice weekend.

How did you land that job
at the literary agency?

- The literary agency?
- Where you read Billy's script.

- Isn't that how you first met?
- Oh, the literary agency.

Would you excuse us for just a sec?

Billy, how could you do this?
This is absolutely humiliating.

- You should be flattered.
- Flattered?

I am going back there right now
and tell them the truth.

Just wait a second.

I don't get it. Why the charade?
What are you trying to prove?

I'm not trying to prove anything.

Look, it's just that,
last year, on my Dad's birthday,

he asked me to be a partner in Campbell
& Sons, the family furniture store.

It was a really big deal, and I
turned him down. He was devastated.

We didn't talk for weeks.
So I made him this deal

that I'd try writing for a year,
and if it didn't work,

I'd give the family business
equal time. One year.

- What do I have to do with this?
- Well, I just thought

that our relationship might,
you know, take his mind off things.

Making you an agent's assistant
actually gives me credibility.

- Billy, this is crazy.
- It's two days.

Come on, you're good for my image.

If he sees I'm doing well,
he'll probably lay off.

I think we should leave.
Tell them I have a family emergency.

- Tell them I'm allergic to the desert.
- Nobody's allergic to the desert.

People come up here to get away
from their allergies.

Please?

You tricked me.

I am really gonna k*ll you for this.

- How is everything, Alison?
- It's delicious, really.

- It's great, Mom.
- Billy's mother has a real talent.

Most people go out to eat
important dinners, but we stay in.

I have a gift for sauces.

I also enjoy making
an occasional special-event dessert.

Otherwise, I'm really
a very ordinary cook.

Come on, don't be so modest.

Talent is such an inscrutable quality.

It can't be bought or sold,
taken or given away.

I really believe it's in the genes.

- I hope not.
- I'm serious.

Billy's sister,
she has the sauce thing.

She has the pastry thing,
though she doesn't admit that.

That proves my point. I think it passes
from generation to generation.

So, Billy,
do you have the sauce thing?

- I don't think so.
- Billy's got the salesman thing.

- How do you know that?
- It's in my gut.

- Maybe it skipped a generation.
- No, nonsense. No.

Alison, tell me something,
in your professional opinion,

how long is it before Billy
actually makes a living

at this business of writing?

My professional opinion?

Well, it depends.

I mean, he just needs that break.

The elusive lucky break.
Could be months, huh?

- Possibly.
- Years?

Don't think we need to discuss this.

He's right.
We'll talk about this later.

Sorry, sorry. I was just
trying to make conversation.

- Where are you off to?
- Oh, my God, you're gonna die.

The casting director invited me
to this party in the Hollywood Hills.

- Pretty hot, huh?
- I thought so when I bought it.

You don't mind?
I went through my whole closet.

- I've only worn it once.
- I'll take care of it, OK?

I can't believe this!
Ten minutes early! I'm not ready.

- Can you go get that?
- No, you get it.

- Rhonda, please.
- Sandy, I think it's very important

that you answer the door.

- Surprise!
- Oh, my God!

- Congratulations, gorgeous!
- We are so happy for you.

Thank you so much. You guys
didn't have to go through all this.

- Yes, we do. We're very proud of you.
- Thank you!

Get this show on the road.
Get glasses and a Kn*fe.

- Cool.
- Oh, listen, you guys,

this is sweet, but I have a date
and he's gonna be here in five minutes.

That's great,
he can help us toast you.

He's a casting director and I don't
want him to think this is a big deal.

I see. So we're trying
to play it cool, are we?

You have to. Part of the business.

So I'll just help you, you know,
get these balloons out of here.

- I really feel bad about this, but...
- God, just leave them.

I can't. You don't understand, do you?

Just tell him it's my birthday,
for god sakes.

Fine. I really do
appreciate this, I really do.

I guess I'll just go
meet my date outside.

Dad, I get the feeling you're upset.

Nonsense.

You're here.

That's more than I can say
for your sisters.

You're disappointed with me,
aren't you?

No, Billy,
I'm not disappointed with you.

I just wish you'd give me a chance.

- I do.
- No, you don't.

You've got an opportunity, Billy,

to take over a business that I know
can bring you a lot of joy and security.

It did it for my father,
and Lord knows, it's done it for me.

So many people out there
are struggling now, so many out of work.

These just don't seem to be the times
to be indulging yourself.

- I don't feel I'm indulging myself.
- Wait a minute.

Now, we made a deal, didn't we?
You said you'd give it a year.

What's a year? Give it a sh*t.

If I'm wrong, I'm wrong.

OK, Dad.

Alison, I want you to know
that both Billy's sisters

lived with men
before they got married.

So don't feel self-conscious about us.

It's fine with you and Billy
sleeping on the pull-out couch.

- It's really not necessary.
- I insist.

- Good night, you two.
- Good night.

- Night.
- Good night, Mom.

Good night, sweetie.

You are not serious about us
sleeping in the same bed?

It's late, Alison. You can trust me.
You don't have to worry about anything.

- What's that supposed to mean?
- It means go to sleep.

I can't believe this is happening.
This is my worst nightmare.

I'm telling your parents
the truth tomorrow.

- Tell 'em whatever you want.
- Billy, what is wrong?

You didn't exactly come to my defense
tonight at dinner.

- What'd you want me to do, lie?
- For starters.

Why can't you just tell your father,
"No, I am not interested."

It's not that easy.

- The bottom line?
- Yeah.

I just don't want to break his heart.

Move over.

You gonna turn out the light?

Look who finally made it home.

Hello, Jake.
Isn't it past your bedtime?

- Where were you tonight?
- Big Hollywood party.

Jake, it was amazing.
The incredible people,

- the food and the champagne.
- Hey, hey, quiet.

- Everyone's asleep.
- I feel like my life is beginning!

The way it's supposed to be,
the way I've dreamed,

and it's faster than I hoped.

You never really
believed I'd make it.

I never said that.

Don't lie. I know what you thought.

Well, let me tell you
what I'm thinking right now.

What do you say we go
for a little midnight swim?

You had your chance, Jake.

You had your chance.

A tie? I didn't know
you owned a tie.

Well, it took a search and destroy
mission to find it.

You look very professional.

My dad likes his salesmen
to wear ties.

If this is making you
so miserable, why are you doing it?

I don't know.
A sense of obligation, I guess.

- A sense of guilt.
- Take your pick.

This is exactly the kind of thing that
destroys relationships with parents.

No, we made a deal.
So I gotta see it through.

- I owe it to him.
- And what about you and what you want?

Don't you understand?

My whole life, my dad's always
made sure I had everything I wanted.

He's been there for me.

I know deep down
he wants what's best for me.

What would you do
if it was your dad?

I guess we've had
different experiences.

It's funny, they either
don't love you enough,

or they love you too much.
I wonder if anybody ever gets it right.

Good luck today, Billy.

Thanks. If you need a couch,
percent off, let me know.

How's that feel?
There's nothing like floral chintz.

- I have it all over my place.
- I like it.

Yeah, at . a yard,
it's the best bargain in LA.

But I just don't know
that it works with country pine.

You can't go wrong with the chintz.
I know, really. Believe me. Really.

Better let us see a swatch
of the woven check,

- and the grand paisley.
- Yeah.

OK.

That's the ticket, Billy.
You're this close.

Come on, it's hard enough as it is.

Keep on talking.
You're going great.

You mean lying.
Like I have chintz in my apartment.

You're giving people what they want.

Sometimes people need
a little encouragement.

Accept it. You got the gift.
It's in the genes.

Hey, Bill, look.

Harry and Jimmy over there,
they've been with me years.

They'd k*ll to have
your natural sales ability.

Nothing wrong with being a salesman
that isn't wrong with being anyone else.

I'm trying, Dad. Really, I am.

Something smells yummy.

- Your dinner, babe.
- You didn't have to do that.

I insist. I don't want you straining
yourself anymore than you have to.

OK, Wolfgang Puck,
what's on the menu?

We got something nutritious.
Fresh veggies and noodles.

On the other hand, I would k*ll
for a Quarter Pounder. Let's see.

- Looks interesting.
- Yeah.

Trust me, you're gonna love this.

You better be careful.
I could get very used to this.

OK. Shoo, shoo.
I'm almost done.

- Damn!
- Oh, God! Michael!

Michael! Get it out!

That's enough!
We got it! We got it! We got it!

Get some ice!

Honey, honey! Let me see your hand.

Gosh, babe. Your dinner.

Keep it on, keep it on.

- Babe, I wanna make this easy on you.
- I know, sweetheart.

I'll go pick up two Quarter Pounders.

Billy, you have won a million dollars.

Seriously, Ed McMahon said so.

How'd your first day go?

Nothing wrong with being a salesman

that isn't wrong
with being anybody else.

My God, who are you?
What do you want?

You know what I want. To make
you suffer. To make you feel pain.

Stay away, don't come near me.

To make you feel
the torment of the damned.

- The way you tormented others.
- The way you tormented others?

- That's not in the script.
- Sorry. I got carried away.

First day of sh**ting and my stomach's
just turning somersaults.

- How do I look?
- Like you're prime to be k*lled.

You're gonna make
a wonderful bloody corpse.

Red's your best color, right?

Rhonda, ever since I landed this part,
you've been nothing but bitchy.

You've got a swelled head.

I don't need this.
I'm sh**ting in an hour.

You've changed.
Just like that.

- I gotta find my purse.
- One slasher movie

and you throw your friends away
like toilet paper.

- Come on!
- Oh, come on.

Everybody in this building's
noticed it. Everybody's hurt.

Know what I think?
Everybody's a little selfish.

They can't stand seeing somebody
making their dreams happen,

Especially when nothing's
happening for them.

Rhonda, I'm sorry.

I can't do this now.
I can't lose my friends.

- I need your support.
- You've got my support.

But I won't be your doormat.
That's not what I call being a friend.

Fine. Don't want to be friends,
we won't be.

Know what else?
We won't be roommates.

I'll just get my things
and I'm outta here.

No, this is your place.
I'll move out. And I'll move up.

- That's exactly where I'm heading.
- Well, break a leg, baby.

Cut. Print.

All right.

OK. That's good.

Frank, was that good?

Get the body clean.
Great, good job.

Perfect.
You've got a great set of lungs.

You're not just saying that?
I did good?

Speaking of lungs gives me a thought.
I want to do one more.

- You got it.
- I think it's good.

- I gotta show emotion.
- Louis.

Listen. Now, this time
when you go to s*ab her,

I want you to rip open her blouse first.
Better yet, use the Kn*fe.

Do it very slowly,
one button at a time.

All right, we all set?
All right, let's do it!

- Let's go!
- All right. Position one.

- Wait a minute, this shirt thing.
- Where's my view-finder?

- Exposing myself wasn't in the script.
- Not everything is in the script.

That's why they pay me the big bucks.

I know, but out of nowhere, you're
asking me if I could take my top off.

- So?
- I don't think I can.

Right. You're an actress
full of integrity and principle.

Look, I don't have time
for a pep talk here.

If you don't want to do it,
we'll recast and I'll pick up the scene.

- Recast?
- You think you're special?

There are a thousand blondes
out there itching to take your place.

Now what's it gonna be, in or out?

Terrific. OK, going again!

All right, everybody, let's go.

Quiet, please.
Positions number one, please.

And camera rolling.

Scene , take two, marker.

Everyone concentrate.

And action.

That's right, Louis.
Now do it very slowly.

Now run the blade across her chest.

That's great, Sandy. Great.
You're feeling it now.

Just let those tears keep flowing.

- What's going on?
- I'm moving out.

Sandy, I didn't mean
you had to leave today.

I've been meaning to get my own
place anyway. I need more space.

- I didn't think it would be this soon.
- Neither did I.

I met these people and they told me
about this guest house.

It's a great deal. So...

- How'd the filming go?
- It was great.

You were asleep when I left.
I didn't want to wake you.

- You remembered all your lines?
- Yeah.

I was a little nervous at first,
but then I got past it.

Gosh, Sandy. Things seem
to be moving fast for you.

- It sure feels that way.
- I hope it wasn't anything that,

you know, I said.
I tried to be supportive.

No, it's just time.

- Here, let me help.
- No, it's OK. I got it.

It's a little spongy.
I like something a bit more plush.

For the price, it's the best
construction on the market.

- I've seen similar much cheaper.
- That's doubtful.

- We have the best prices in LA.
- On sale.

- Everything in the store is on sale.
- We have sale prices every day.

That's a crock. You mark up the retail
and call the regular price a sale.

- I know a scam when I see one.
- No, we have genuine discount prices.

You're a salesman. You'd say anything
to get me to walk out with a couch.

To tell you the truth, I'd be happy
if you'd walk out right now.

What did you say?

Can I help you, madam.
My name is William Campbell, the owner.

You should know you've got some
very rude salespeople working for you.

Well, I would really like
to rectify the situation if I can.

No, I really don't
have the time right now.

What a bitch.

Son, the biggest part of this job

is dealing with difficult
personalities like that.

Now I want you
to go after her and apologize.

- Just forget it.
- I mean it.

No!

Dad, would you just stop the charade?

Both of us know
I'm not cut out for this job.

How will you ever find the discipline
to succeed as a writer

if you don't have the discipline
to last a week on the job?

I don't know. Maybe that's something
I have to discover for myself.

Look, Dad, I am sorry, OK?

But it was just a bad idea,
and I can't do it.

- Where are you going?
- Nowhere. See ya, Jake.

Get your hand off me.

You talk to me.

I gotta get out of here.
I need a new start.

Something happened, Sandy?

Or you just... you just moving up so
fast you're gonna leave your friends?

No, I'm going nowhere fast.

Things didn't go so great, huh?

Let's just say
they threw me for a loop.

Everything was fine.
I was fine, I wasn't nervous.

I knew all my lines.

And then the director said,
"Let's try it another way.

Let's have the guy cut my blouse,
hold my breasts

and hold a Kn*fe up to my throat."

At first I thought, this is fine.

It's the character, it's not me.
I can do this, it doesn't matter.

And then I just couldn't do it.

- I couldn't let myself be exploited.
- What's wrong with that?

There's nothing wrong with it,
but I exploit myself every day.

With what I say, how I move.

I've been doing it so long, I don't know
when the act ends and when I begin.

- Yeah, I know how you feel.
- Do you?

Maybe that's why I became an actress.

The only time I have feelings is when
I'm able to pretend I'm somebody else.

- I just need a new act.
- Or maybe you'll just be yourself.

Jake, to be honest, I don't have
the slightest idea who that person is.

So I see. When the going gets tough,
you're just gonna walk away.

Jake, I gotta go.
I need new friends.

I need a new life. It's the only way
I know how to handle this.

Look. I understand.
I've been there.

If you think you're gonna walk out and
nobody's gonna miss you, you're wrong.

Right. Well, I can fax it to you.

Or, if you can wait, I can have
the proofs to you in about an hour.

Fine. Both then.

- I really need to talk.
- Billy, get off my desk.

Aren't you supposed to be at work?

I spent the afternoon
in a movie theatre.

Wonder who goes to the movies
in the afternoon?

- Not really.
- The beautiful and the damned.

These nubile teenage girls
who have nothing but time,

and unemployed, disenfranchised men,
slurping their sodas and averting eyes.

- Billy, what happened?
- I love my dad.

- But I can't please him.
- It's not your job to please him.

- I can't work in that store.
- I never thought you could.

You didn't?
Why didn't you say something?

Who am I, the great, old, wise one?
I can't tell you what to do.

D & D. Yes.

Oh, hi!

Just a sec, I'll connect you.

- Pasta Mancini, coming right up.
- Just a smidgen for me, hon.

- I'm not that hungry.
- What's wrong?

I just don't have
that much of an appetite.

Come on, I know you.
Honey, what's really wrong?

You know, you and me, sometimes
we don't even need the words.

We feel things passing between us,

sharing things I wouldn't
imagine telling anyone else.

It wasn't easy to learn that trust.

And now, just when we've got it down,

there's going to be
someone else there.

And it's not gonna be
just you and me anymore.

Honey, he won't change what we have.
He'll just make it stronger.

Yeah, but what if I don't know
what to say to him?

What if we're strangers?
What if I don't know who he is?

He'll be half you and half me.

And if you get the words wrong
once in a while, it won't matter.

Even if you never saw his face
or touched his cheek

or heard his voice,
you'll know a lot more about him

than he knows about himself.

Oh, honey, he's going to love you.

What makes you so wise?

I'm going to be somebody's mom.
I have to be.

Are you back to pick up
your stuff so soon?

I'm not going anywhere.

Oh, well, what happened to the
great deal in the Hollywood Hills?

Don't do this to me.

I'm back... if you want me.

Of course I want you, fool.

Listen, Sandy, I gotta admit

it was tough seeing these things
happen for you so quickly,

and sometimes it seems
like I'm spinning wheels.

If I had to do with why you left...

No, it didn't have anything
to do with you, it was just me.

It happened for the best. It's kinda
funny, I feel like I have a new start.

Are you gonna tell me
what this is all about?

Later. All I can think about right now
is, did you save a piece of that cake?

- It's in the fridge.
- Let's go pig out.

And then you can help me with the
three suitcases and the four boxes.

I don't believe this!
The next time you have a freak att*ck

and feel like blastin' out
like some lunatic, talk to me.

- You made me crazy.
- I'm sorry, Rhonda.

I am an unbalanced personality,
aren't I?

Yes, you are. But we kind of
balance each other out.

Pig out time.
A fork for you, a fork for me.

Chocolate!

- Hi, Dad.
- Hi.

- You got a second?
- Yeah.

I'm glad you're back, Bill.

I didn't think you were
that kind of a quitter. Sit down.

It turned out to be a big day.
We could have used you this afternoon.

I'm sorry.

Look, I didn't come here
to ask for my job back.

I just came to tell you that
I have to start doing things my way.

Because it's my life,
you know what I mean?

And my life isn't about furniture.
And I know that deep inside.

And I just don't think
that I need to waste a whole year

in order to prove that to myself.

A year is nothing, Bill.
Not to try a new career.

I know, but just because I'm not, you
know, following in your footsteps,

- doesn't mean that I don't really...
- What?

Go ahead.
Talk your way out of this.

I love you. Isn't that enough?
Or do I have to be you too?

No. Of course you don't.

When your grandfather
turned this store over to me,

it was the most exciting day of my life.
I couldn't help feeling

that if you only gave it a sh*t,
you'd get the same kind of thrill

out of it that I did. But...

And he's only been dead eight years,

and I still left the name there,
Campbell & Sons.

- It always seemed kinda morbid to me.
- You did?

- I left it there for you.
- I know, Dad.

So, you better make sure
that this is what you want.

Because once I put out for new cards,
new stationery

and a brand new sign,
I'm not switching back.

I don't think I'll be changing my mind.

- OK.
- I'll see you, Dad.

- Hey.
- That smells great. Enough for me?

- You bet.
- I'll pay for half.

- My treat. How'd it go?
- It was fine.

Yeah, I think we came
to an understanding.

He's probably gonna try
and take another sh*t

at getting me back
before he gives up.

Can't blame a guy for trying.

- Thanks.
- No problem.

I assume you cleared
everything up about us?

Us?

- Oh, yeah, us.
- Yeah. Did you?

My family, we rent
this houseboat out on Lake Powell

for a weekend every August.
And so we'll tell them then.

Billy, wait!

Wait a minute, Billy!

I am not spending the weekend
with you on a houseboat!

Come on, fresh air,
water-skiing, a couple mosquitoes.

- You'll have a great time.
- What's their number?

Wait. Would you stop.
What are you?

- Get over here.
- What's their number?

- Wait.
- What?

You're not calling anybody.

If you're not gonna tell,
I'm gonna. What's their number?

I will tell them on the houseboat.

I am not gonna wait till
we're on the houseboat to tell.

- I'm not going.
- Get seasick?

Give me the phone.
Give me the phone!

- Give me the number!
- Give me the phone!

- Give me the number.
- Give me the phone...

- Number.
- Phone.

Number!