TV ANNOUNCER:
We now return
to tonight's Creepy-Time
Theater presentation
of "Night of the Robot."
( screaming )
Hurry, Gary,
the scary robot movie's on.
( meows )
What do you mean
I shouldn't watch this?
Scary movies don't always
freak me out.
( whimpering and shivering )
What if Mom is a robot?
What if Uncle Sherm is a robot?
What if Gary is a robot?
Gary?
( snoring )
Psst, Gary?
Gare-bear?
( meows )
Gary, if you were a robot,
you'd tell me, right?
( meows )
Oh, I got nothing
to worry about.
And now to get
a good night's sleep.
( snoring )
( screaming )
( SpongeBob screaming )
( SpongeBob panting )
( panting )
Robot! Oh, my gosh!
Huh?
( chuckles nervously )
How about a little music
to count me money to?
RADIO DJ:
And now for the number-one
song in Bikini Bottom,
"Electric Zoo."
( techno-pop song playing )
Hey, that's pretty catchy!
♪ Bee-bee-boo-bop,
bee-bee-boo-beep. ♪
Yeah, that's not bad.
l love this
young people's music.
( buzzer buzzing )
I surrender!
Oh.
SQUIDWARD:
SpongeBob!
( screams )
Squidward, why are you
wearing my hat on your nose?
I'm not wearing your hat
on my nose.
I'm waiting
for number 's order!
Number ... Krabby Patty
and a medium beverage.
Of course.
Sorry, Squidward,
I'm not really feeling
myself today.
I guess I'm a little bit jumpy.
l keep thinking robots
are taking over the world...
probably on account of this
movie I watched last night
where robots take over
the world.
I even asked Gary
if he was a robot.
Pretty funny, huh?
( flatly ):
Hilarious.
Just deliver the food.
There you go.
Enjoy your...
Say, you're not
a robot, are you?
No. I'm not.
( whispering ):
Well, keep your eyes peeled.
They're everywhere.
Back to work!
KRABS:
I feel completely recharged.
That sounds
like Mr. Krabs.
Come on, little buddy,
play it again, please?
One more time,
for me.
That was strange.
Mr. Krabs was talking
to his radio,
and he said
he feels "recharged."
If I didn't know better,
l'd say he was...
a robot!
Nah.
Yes, hello.
l was wondering if you
could play that song again.
Hmm, which one, man?
The one that goes
"Bee-boo-boo-bop,
boo-boo-beep."
No, man, you're thinking of
"Bee-boo-boo-bop, boo-boo-bop."
KRABS:
Bee-bee-boo, boo-boo-bop?
Bee-boo-boo-bop?
Boo-boo-bee-bop?
Not "Bee-boo-boo-beep"?
Bop?
Beep?!
Boo-boo-bop?!
( screaming )
( teeth chattering )
Oh, my gosh!
Why was Mr. Krabs making
all those beeping sounds?
Could it be that he's a robot?
Nah.
( gasps )
( "Electric Zoo" playing )
Oh, Squidward, it's terrible!
Mr. Krabs...
talking to radio...
beeping sounds...
strange dancing...
robot!
That's great, SpongeBob.
Why don't you work
on this problem back
in the kitchen!
( chuckling )
I'm serious, Squidward.
Mr. Krabs is a robot.
And I can prove it, too!
How did you...?
Let's see... in the movie,
the robots didn't have
a sense of humor;
they couldn't laugh.
Hey, Mr. Krabs!
What is it, boy?
Squidward just told me
a hilarious joke
and I thought you
might like to hear it.
Is it true, Squidward?
Is it hilarious?
Um... yeah, sure.
Well, let's hear it, lad.
Okay, here it goes.
Uh, how'd it go, Squidward?
( chuckling nervously )
It went... um, uh,
let's see, uh...
Why couldn't the -year-old
get into the pirate movie?
Why?
It was rated "Arr!"
( laughing )
Arr!
( laughing )
Because it's...
about... pirates.
I'm not paying you to do
stand-up, Mr. Squidward.
Now, get back to work.
( gasps )
Not even a chuckle!
See, Squidward?
He didn't laugh because
he couldn't laugh
because he's a robot!
There's a logical explanation
why he didn't laugh, SpongeBob.
He's obviously heard it before.
The only reason
you think Krabs
is a robot
is because you watched
that stupid movie.
Now, why don't you...
Hey, Mr. Krabs!
What?
What is it, boy?
Squidward's father
never hugged him.
Isn't that sad?
( crying )
Yes, I suppose
that is rather sad.
But Squidward
can hug himself
during his break.
Now, get back to work!
Just like the robot in the
movie... he couldn't cry either.
SpongeBob,
this is getting ridiculous.
l'll have you know
my father loved me very much!
That's the final test,
Squidward... the love test.
Robots can't love.
Now, wait, SpongeBob...
Hey, Mr. Krabs!
What is it, SpongeBob?
I just wanted to tell you
that Squidward loves you!
Get back to work,
Mr. Squidward.
( gulping )
Squidward?
( "Electric Zoo" playing )
( music slows, then stops )
( static crackling )
Aw, me radio died.
Mm... these batteries still
have a little juice in them.
I know... I'll give them
to Pearl for Christmas.
( timer dings )
Me hard-boiled egg is ready!
I can already taste it.
Come to Papa!
Gotcha!
And what good is a hard-boiled
egg without a little salt?
SPONGEBOB:
Mr. Krabs!
What...? Ahh!
( screaming )
Oh, my eyes! Ahh!
Mister...
Will you be quiet?
Now, listen.
What did these robots
in the movie look like?
They had piercing red eyes,
metal pincers for hands
and they ran on batteries.
Okay, so tell me, does Mr. Krabs
look anything like that?!
( screaming )
( screaming )
( both screaming )
( Krabs screaming )
I'll evacuate the customers,
you call the Navy.
Hello, Operator,
get me the Navy.
( recorded voice ):
Hello, you've reached the
Navy's automated phone service.
Squidward, the robots
are running the Navy!
Not the Navy!
Attention everyone:
Run for your lives!
Robots have taken over
the world!
Our world!
( all screaming )
What do we do now?
I don't know.
Hey, a nickel!
SpongeBob!
Sorry.
Ah, that's better.
♪ Bee, boo-boo-bee-boop,
boo-boo-bop... ♪
We need to find out
what that robot did with
the real Mr. Krabs, but how?
Well, in the movie the hero
teams up with a buddy,
and they get the poop
on the robot.
They poop on the robot?
Yeah, you know, they get
the straight poop,
ask questions, get information.
I never thought I'd say this,
but, SpongeBob,
let's get that poop!
( door opens )
Oh, hello, boys.
What can I do for you?
( lock clicks )
Why did you lock the door?
Why do you have that rope?
Who's watching
the cash register?!
( all shouting, loud crashing )
SpongeBob! Squidward!
What's the meaning of this?
Untie me this instant!
Shut up.
( loud smack )
Sweet Davy Jones!
What the heck is going on?
I said shut up,
you bucket of bolts!
I can't take it!
( crying )
SpongeBob, are you okay?
( crying ):
Oh, Squidward, seeing you
slap Mr. Krabs like that
is just too horrible to watch.
No, that's
not Mr. Krabs.
That's Robot Krabs.
Oh, yeah.
And the only way
to deal with these
robot types
is to find out what they know.
Right.
SpongeBob, you
got to ask him
a question first.
Oh, yeah.
What color is my underwear?
SpongeBob,
let me handle this.
Where's Mr. Krabs?
What are you talking about?
I'm Mr. Krabs.
We can do this
all night if
you want.
Where's Mr. Krabs?
I'm Mr. Krabs.
Where's Mr. Krabs?
I'm Mr. Krabs.
Where's Mr. Krabs?
I am Mr. Krabs!
I am! I am! I am! I am!
l am! I am! I am!
This is one stubborn robot.
What?!
You think I'm a robot?!
We don't think;
we know.
That's the silliest thing
l've ever heard.
I am Mr. Krabs!
He's not cracking.
We'll never get it
out of him this way.
I got an idea.
Keep an eye on him, Squidward.
Don't fall for any
of his robo-tricks.
( clanging )
If Robot Krabs won't tell us
where Mr. Krabs is,
maybe one of his
little robot friends will.
SpongeBob, uh, that's a blender.
Yeah, but I saw Mr. Krabs
talking with his radio before.
He called it his
"little buddy."
Oh, really?
Put it on the table, SpongeBob.
You're going
to interrogate
my blender?
You're crazy!
We're just going
to see what your
"little buddy" knows.
No, wait!
What are you going to do
to me blender?!
That cost me money!
Where's Mr. Krabs?
Not talking, eh?
No! That cost me $ . !
I guess it didn't know anything.
Go get the toaster.
No, not me toaster.
That cost me $ . !
$ . !
Fort...
Well, actually,
that one was a gift.
No!
This is the last robot,
Squidward.
No! Not my cash register!
I raised it myself!
l got it when it was
just a little calculator.
No!
( crying )
( crying )
I thought you said
robots can't cry.
I also said they couldn't love.
( crying ):
I loved it like it was me own!
Ah... at least
he's not laughing.
Oh, I remember the laughs
we used to share... ( crying )
SpongeBob, how
did that movie
of yours end?
The movie?
Oh, yeah, the ending was great!
Turns out there weren't
any robots after all.
It was just their...
imagination.
( laughs nervously )
Hey, it's time to feed Gary.
( runs quickly )
( chuckles nervously )
( Krabs growling )
Squidward!
( gasps )
Gary, the paper's here!
You can have this, buddy,
because all I need is
the "Entertainment" section.
( humming )
I am a happy sponge!
( laughs )
( laughing )
( meows )
( laughing )
I see you got the paper.
Oh, hey, Patrick.
( clears throat )
Well, I'd better get going.
Yep, see you later.
Cheep-cheep-cheep.
SPONGEBOB AND PATRICK:
What did you say?
Well, I didn't say anything.
I didn't say anything either.
BOTH:
See you later, then.
Cheep-cheep-cheep.
All right, quit messing with me.
I know you said something.
Ah, but it is you
that is messing with me.
Cheep-cheep-cheep.
That's what's messing with us.
It's a baby scallop.
I'll take care of this.
SPONGEBOB:
No, Patrick!
It's totally helpless.
lt looks like
he can't even fly yet.
Well, what's the matter?
Is he stupid?
No, Patrick, he's just a baby.
He's all alone
with no one to
take care of him.
Well, we can't just
leave him out here.
You're right.
Come on, let's take him
into the pineapple.
Hmm, let's see... we need
a box for him to sleep in.
There you go.
It's the best seat in the house.
( plays rimshot )
Let me see.
Hey, it's kind of cute.
Uh-oh!
I think somebody's hungry!
Is it true?
Are you hungry?
Cheep-cheep-cheep-cheep!
I've got just the thing.
How would you like
a Krabby Patty?
( yelps )
SpongeBob
SquarePants,
are you crazy?
That's not the right food
for a little fellow like him.
Of course not.
l don't know
what I was thinking.
What he needs is a
tiny Krabby Patty.
( sniffing )
Blech!
Huh? No one's ever turned down
one of these down before.
( gobbles, gulps )
Let's try a doughnut.
( hisses )
French fries?
Uh-uh.
A doughnut?
( blows raspberry )
All we have left
is this apple.
Hello, sea creatures!
I bring you greetings
from Apple World.
( chirps urgently )
Of course.
Scallops love worms.
Huh? Wait!
WORM ( shouting ):
We will bury you!
( scallop gulps )
Well, you should be good
for the rest...
( cries )
What now?
I don't know!
( wailing )
Aw, don't cry!
( wailing )
Do something, SpongeBob!
Uh... uh... uh...
Blah-blah-blah,
look at the funny face!
Doo, doo-doo, doo-doo,
look at the funny face!
Look at the funny face.
Wait!
I think I might
know the problem.
Yep, that's it all right.
Hold on just one second.
Here he is, good as new.
How did you know?
How do you think?
And I've been doing it
all by myself
for almost a year.
Wow, I'm sure glad you're here.
I know, good thing
there's two of us.
You know, Patrick,
since this scallop
doesn't have parents,
we should raise it ourselves.
Yeah, at least
till it's old enough
to be on its own.
Oh, I want to be the mom!
I don't think you can
be the mom, Patrick,
because you never wear a shirt.
You're right.
lf I was a mom, this
would be kind of shocking.
Just call me "Daddy"!
( upbeat background
music plays )
♪ ♪
PATRICK:
lt sure is cute
when it's asleep.
SPONGEBOB:
Yeah.
( scallop snoring softly )
Shh!
Hey, SpongeBob.
Yes, Patrick?
I never thought being a parent
could be this much fun.
Me neither.
Well, good night, SpongeBob.
Good night, Patrick.
SPONGEBOB:
Patrick, breakfast is ready!
( food sizzling )
PATRICK:
All right!
All this parenting stuff
makes me hungry.
( burps loudly )
Hey, Junior,
how you doing today?
( sniffs )
SpongeBob?
SPONGEBOB:
Yes, Patrick?
Kid's got a stinky.
Could you take care of him?
My hands are kind of full.
( guzzling )
( crying )
Ahh...
Wish I could,
but I got to get going.
Going? Where are you going?
Going to work.
I'm the dad, remember?
You mean I have to do
all this baby stuff myself?
I'll give you a break tonight
when I get home.
Don't you two stop
being adorable.
( chuckles )
( scallop crying )
Okay.
( laughs weakly )
( crickets chirping )
Phew! What a day.
Oh, great, you're home.
Now you can help me
with the baby.
Aw, gee, SpongeBob, I'd love to,
but I'm totally beat from work.
Huh?
( sighs contentedly )
( "bonk" on TV )
( laughs heartily )
That guy got hit in the head
with a coconut!
Patrick, what about my break?
Oh, yeah, your break.
Uh, tomorrow, I promise.
Uh, okay, tomorrow.
( scallop crying )
Phew, another tough day.
Oh, Patrick, I'm so glad you're
home after working all day.
I can't wait for my break.
Work was a k*ller.
I need my chair.
( groans )
Patrick, I really need my...
Tomorrow for sure.
( weakly ):
Patrick?
I'll get to it
eventually...
( scallop brawling )
Uh...?
Uh.
( music playing on TV )
Patrick Star, we need to talk!
Just one more minute...
l got to...
Don't "one more minute" me, Mr. Man!
( TV shuts off )
Hey! I'm missing the coconut.
You haven't been
helping at all with Junior!
We made a commitment,
and you're not doing your share!
You never do anything.
I changed his diaper.
Yeah, once.
He's only this big.
How many diapers
can he possibly use?
Hmm?
Oh, that's not so much.
Hmm?
So?
Hmm?
Hmm?
Hmm?
( quivers )
I had no idea!
What kind of father am I?
( whimpers )
I'll make it up to you, buddy.
I promise.
So, what's the plan for today?
No more fooling around.
From now on, I'm Superdad!
I'll work straight through lunch
so I can get home on time.
So make sure you save
a big old stinky diaper
for me to change.
And you could take
the night off, pal.
Great. So I'll
see you at : .
: .
: .
: .
: .
: .
: .
: .
( laughing )
Oh, boy, that was some party!
Oh, hey, SpongeBob.
Hey, Junior.
What?
What?!
Oh, nothing.
Oh, what a relief.
For a second,
I thought you
were mad at me.
Do you remember what you
said to me this morning?
Something about
root beer, right?
( draws deep breath )
No.
Wait, wait.
Let me guess.
I give up.
Does "You could take
the night off, pal"
ring a bell?
Pfft... I don't need this!
What?!
Where do you think you're going?
I'm going back to work.
Work?!
( growls )
( grunting )
( laughing )
He got hit in the head
with two coconuts!
So... this is work?
You know, it's not
as easy as it looks.
Sometimes I got
to move the antenna,
sometimes I lose the remote,
and sometimes my butt
itches real bad!
Oh, you poor, poor thing.
By the way, you forgot
your briefcase!
Oh, so this is the thanks I get
for working overtime?
Overtime?!
Yeah, overtime, pal. Oh,
boy, yeah, you're working.
lf that's the kind of
work you're doing, You know what that means?
show me where to
sign up for it,
'cause I'm working
my fingers to the bone.
That means working when
you're too tired to work.
You just keep going
and working and working.
You never
helped. Never!
( arguing stops,
scallop peeping )
There is that
stupid noise again!
Oh, that's not a stupid noise.
That's just Junior about to jump
out of that two-storied window.
Oh.
Junior!
Junior!
Here, darling!
Here we come, buddy!
Sweetie, right here!
Come to Daddy, come to Daddy,
right in the old pocket.
Come here, buddy!
\-hCome on! Uh-oh!
Did you catch him?
No.
We're bad parents.
We're bad parents.
( sobbing )
( sobbing )
Cheep-cheep-cheep.
Cheep-cheep-cheep-
cheep-cheep.
Junior?
He's flying.
I guess he's all grown up.
( kiss )
Hey, what about Daddy?
( bonk )
( kiss )
That's my boy.
Good-bye.
Good-bye, Junior.
Well, Patrick,
he doesn't need
us anymore.
This is the hardest part
of every parent's life...
I assume.
Despite all we've been
through, it was worth it.
Yeah.
Let's have another.
03x09 - Krab Borg/Rock-a-Bye Bivalve
Watch/Buy Amazon Merchandise
A square yellow sponge named SpongeBob SquarePants lives in a pineapple with his pet snail, Gary, in the city of Bikini Bottom on the floor of the Pacific Ocean.
A square yellow sponge named SpongeBob SquarePants lives in a pineapple with his pet snail, Gary, in the city of Bikini Bottom on the floor of the Pacific Ocean.