05x17 - The Road You Didn't Take

[bunniefuu]

♪ Feel a change in the weather ♪

♪ There's a bite in the cold ♪

♪ This I know ♪

♪ This I know ♪

♪ There's a tear in the leather ♪

♪ There's a crease in the fold ♪

♪ This I know ♪

♪ This I know ♪

♪♪

♪♪

[CELLPHONE RINGS]

- ANDY: Luisa, hi.
- Where are you?

- On the lam.
- Stop it.

No, I'm on a mini road
trip with a friend.

A chance to clear my head.

I should be home tonight.

Good. Spoke to your
union reps this morning.

Long story short, they've
agreed to let your colleagues

testify as character witnesses at trial,

which is a huge win,
all things considered.

Hm.

We have two very different
perspectives on huge wins.

I'm on trial for defending myself
against a sexual predator,

and my friends are allowed
to say I'm a good person?

That's a hell of a prize.

A predator who was also
a fellow a firefighter

who can't stand trial
for what he did to you,

because he's dead.

And whose fault is that?

This is very good for your case.

The union could have followed
the department's lead on this

and stayed on the sidelines,

but they're supporting you out loud.

We'll talk later.

Sure. [SIGHS]

Okay, back to "Little Orphan
Jack Gets A Brother" road trip.

I got snacks. Why do you look like that?

I know I shouldn't have
left you in charge of snacks.

Pork rinds, seriously?

I wonder if my soon-to-be
brother likes pork rinds.

Might want to put that
on the list, actually.

- What list?
- I made a list...

of, you know, fun facts about myself,

so that we can compare...
things we like.

- You know, like food or music.
- Oh.

I've been reading a book
on fetal development,

and it turns out that
preferences start in the womb,

I guess, and I figured, since
we shared the same one...

Wait, wait, wait. Why are you
reading a book about wombs?

Beca...

It's just a really good read.

I'll let you borrow it when I'm done.

You'll love it.

[GRUNTS]

[ENGINE STARTS]

VIC: Ooh, it smells good.

Dad's making us breakfast.

- [BEN CHUCKLES]
- Look.

- Dad?
- It's a nickname.

- Get with the program.
- Ahh.

This is a celebratory breakfast,

because we sign Pru papers tomorrow.

- Yes! Yes! What?
- Yeah, man. Alright!

I smell bacon. What are we celebrating?

Pru papers! Pru papers!

- [GASPS] No! No!
- Yes!

[LAUGHING, CHEERING]

- When's the party?
- Soon, soon.

Now, who wants scrambled
eggs and who wants over easy?

[GAGS] I'm...

I'm gonna go set up the clinic.

Okay, I'll be right down.
Breakfast is just about ready.

You know, when my dad
d*ed in the line of duty,

one of his teammates
took me under his wing.

Saved my life.

It's really cool what
you and Miranda are doing.

- Appreciate you, man.
- Yeah.

Thank you. Uh, hey, can you
put this on the table for me?

Yeah.

So are we telling people
why eggs make you sick?

Because I'm on hormones.
I don't know. Are we?

Well, conventional wisdom says

that we wait until you're pregnant.

And then wait until the first trimester.

- Right.
- But everyone knew we

were looking at donors, and
we were all out the same day.

I mean, do you think
people suspect it's Jack?

[LAUGHING] I doubt anyone would

fathom that you'd let that happen.

Okay, then maybe we
should talk to him first.

And... for the record,
I don't believe in

the whole "wait until the
first trimester" wisdom.

I think it's just some
patriarchal holdover

to stop women from leaning on
each other in case of miscarriage.

[CELLPHONE CHIMES]

- Oh, my God.
- What?

The... The green card interview.

- It's in three weeks.
- Finally!

- It only took a year.
- Oh, so many reasons to eat bacon.

[LAUGHS] Yeah.

Morning.

I hope I'm not disturbing
your morning meditation there.

Just reading about the
curious track record

of our prospective mayor.

You know, I haven't been here that long,

but I do know that Michael Dixon
would be a poison to this city.

Ah, a common enemy unites us.

- [CHUCKLES]
- You know, Sean, I haven't...

- I haven't apologized to you properly.
- Well, thank you, but no need.

What happened was between me
and my team, and we're good.

Good, then. Good.

You plan on making an appearance
at every clinic day, chief?

Or just the ones where
Fire Zaddy's working?

I like to show support
to all my stations.

I'm heading over to
for a car wash after this,

and you make one more comment like that,

I'll write you up for insubordination.

- Got it?
- Got it.

Morning.

- Morning, .
- BEN: Morning, Chief.

Hey, uh, we've got a breakfast spread

in the beanery if you're hungry.

No, thank you, Warren. I already
had my morning protein shake.

Happy clinic day, everyone.

- Yay.
- Yeah, the last one was great.

Hopefully this one's
gonna be even better.

Bishop, Warren, and DeLuca,

I would love it if you'd walk me
through the med stations later.

There's a board meeting next week,

and I'd like to more
fluently talk about the work

that you all are doing here,
see if we can expand the program.

You know, I can show you through
the check-in process with all the

- patients if you want.
- We can do everything later. Thank you.

♪♪

ANDY: Alright, it's a road
trip and the radio's broken,

so I'm gonna start singing
or we're gonna start talking.

You're nervous about
meeting your brother.

It feels weird to even
say the word "brother.

You know, I mean,
Miller... was my brother.

Warren's my brother.

Me and this guy, we
just share the same DNA.

Yeah, but still, it's
a piece of the puzzle.

Yeah, I guess. I hadn't
really considered I'd ever meet

someone from my bio family.

- Never?
- I mean, I knew they probably existed.

I guess I just didn't allow
myself to... think that far.

Mm.

But now that I found out about him,

it's like all I can think about.

I wonder if we... looked alike
when we were kids, or, um...

if he grew up the way I did.

You know, I hope he didn't,

but if he did, it might be nice to...

have someone who gets it.

- Finally.
- Well, whatever happens,

if he's an ass or you just
don't want to be there,

we leave, alright?
No questions asked, okay?

Thank you.

You're pretty family-smug
after that reunion with your mom.

For the past two years, I swore
I never wanted to see her again,

but then I saw her...
there at my front door.

And instead of yelling
or screaming, I just...

I was just happy to see my mom.

Hmm.

It's like... It's like all my life,

without even knowing it, I've
been trying to do this puzzle,

but I just never could.

And I kept getting pissed at myself,

like, "What is wrong with me?"

But it wasn't me.

I just didn't have... all the pieces.

- ♪♪
- Mm.

- I hate puzzles.
- [LAUGHS]

Terrible at them.

I'm gonna put that on the
list... "hates puzzles." Yeah.

Okay, so when you get your green card,

are we gonna have, like, a big
burgers, beer, and bald eagles party?

[LAUGHS] No, that's
after the citizenship,

- which is still gonna take a few years.
- Seriously?

Oh, yeah. Yeah, I remember
when my mom took her test.

She was drilling me on
presidents' middle names.

I would never have passed that test.

I'm honestly just happy to be
able to leave the country again.

Okay, so, the two of you. How
is it going working together?

- Um, I...
- It's pretty perfect.

[ALARM BEEPS]

Crisis One requested
to Mulberry Drive.

- Oh, that's me.
- That's me.

BOTH: You too?

- Okay, okay.
- Let's go.

Look, if you grip that wheel
any harder, you might break it.

[LAUGHS] We're minutes away,

and I have no idea what to expect.

I feel like my stomach is sweating.

Yeah, yeah. I know the feeling.

'Cause you might go to jail?

- Wow, that is not...
- Oh, sorry, alright?

I'm too anxious to edit.

[EXHALES DEEPLY]

Let's scream. Let's scream it out.

- Seriously?
- Yeah.

We're both drowning in anxiety.
We can't meet your brother like this.

We'll make a terrible impression.

We gotta... We gotta get it out.

- Yeah, let's do it.
- Yeah?

- Yeah, yeah.
- Yeah? You ready?

[EXHALES DEEPLY] Mm-hmm.

- Count of three.
- Okay.

- One...
- On three?

Yes. One.

- Two.
- [SCREAMING]

[SIREN CHIRPING]

- Hi, there.
- ?

- Yeah, that's us.
- I'm Clarke Wright.

- Social worker, Crisis One volunteer.
- Alright, I'm Lieutenant Ruiz.

This is Hughes. Do we
know what's going on?

- [SHOUTING IN BACKGROUND]
- Neighbor called in a domestic dispute.

I cannot believe that you are
buying into this hateful crap!

Come on! You've taken my child, Bryan!

- Excuse me.
- Oh, thank God.

Okay. Please. This is my ex-husband,

and he has taken our child.

We live in Florida, and
he has taken my daughter.

- He has kidnapped her.
- She is not... He is not...

Okay. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Sir,
you need to back up, okay?

- But you don't understand.
- THEO: Alright, sir, please.

They left in the middle of
the night a few days ago,

and, um, I had to track them
down using my daughter's phone.

And I am... worried sick.

It's okay. It's okay.
What's your daughter's name?

Mary. Her name is Mary.

- No.
- You've got to be kidding me.

It's not Mary. My name is Matt.

Do you hear me, Mom?

My name is Matt.

♪♪

Hey, what color's my toothbrush?

If they ask me that,
I'm gonna get deported.

Turquoise, and yours is pink.

There's something a
little wrong with you.

You know that, right?

Is that seriously part of
the green card interview?

Yeah. Ridiculous, right?

Don't you think it's stupid,

all the effort and
resources funneled around

things like keeping
foreigners like Carina

out of this country when
things like healthcare

and schools and public transportation

and the minimum wage
and just, I don't know,

all of it, is just, like,
"You guys figure it out."

Absolutely. But we don't
make those decisions.

Yeah, you're right. The
Dixons of the world do.

ERROLL: Ah.

Is this where the clinic thing is?

Yeah, we're just about to open up.

How can we help you?

Leg's been harder and harder to walk on.

Thought I should have it looked it.

Well, you came to the right place.
Why don't you follow us

and we'll see if we can figure it out.

[BIRDS CHIRPING]

- [WRAPPER CRINKLES]
- There's more in the back.

- You brought your medals with you?
- I don't know who I'm meeting.

He could be some super wealthy
Bruce Wayne-esque type orphan.

I want him to know that I
made something of myself, too.

- Don't look at me like that.
- You didn't Google him?

What? No. I don't Google.
I wouldn't want him to do that to me.

I want to meet him, you know,
clean, like an honest first impression.

I hate people who
Google people, honestly.

I'm putting that on my list.

"Healthy sperm snacks"?

- There's protein bars back there.
- Jack, what the hell is this?

It's... It's bananas.

It's dried bananas, dark
chocolate, pumpkin seeds.

- Yeah, I see that.
- Walnuts, and there's Brazil nuts.

Those are really good for you.
[CLEARS THROAT]

Pretty much everything else
about me is pretty healthy.

I just wanted to make sure my
little guys were healthy, too.

♪♪

Okay, we did not want
people to find out this way.

- "We"?
- Yes.

Carina and Maya... are
trying to get pregnant,

and I might have...
contributed to the process.

♪♪

[SIGHS] Jack, we had a pact.

I didn't sleep with Carina or anything.

- I did it in a receptacle, like a cup.
- Jack, we had a...

We had a pact to not get into

any complicated or messy relationships.

It's not complicated,
messy, or a relationship.

- No?
- No, it's not.

We even talked about
it to the point where

I almost didn't want to do it anymore

just to stop the
talking. It's not messy.

You don't think potentially
being the baby daddy

for your friend/ex/coworker
is complicated?

It may be a little
complex, but not messy.

Okay. I guess.

I mean, if... if you're happy.

Yeah, I'm happy.

[SIGHS]

We had a pact,

and I still... flirted and
danced and kissed Jeremy.

Hold on, okay?

No, I'm sorry. I didn't
mean to make this about me.

No, honestly. I am... I am
thrilled this is about you.

No, I just...

We made the pact because
I always... pick bad guys.

No.

- [GEARSHIFT CLICKS]
- Andy, what...

what Jeremy did was not
because you pick bad guys.

It's not. It's because he's a predator.

End of sentence.

I just...

I know. I know.

- But if I hadn't broken the pact...
- Andy, stop.

Look at me. Look at me.

♪♪

Nothing that happened was your fault.

Nothing.

It is not your fault, you understand?

♪♪

[SIGHS]

[ENGINE STARTS]

I didn't mean it.

I don't always pick bad guys.

♪♪

Well... we're almost there.

♪♪

- Hey.
- Oh, thanks.

So, uh, is there a reason

- the chief gave you the cold shoulder?
- What are you talking about?

We gonna play it like that?

Look, she asked Bishop, DeLuca, and I

to show her around
the clinic and not you?

She basically pretended like
you weren't even in the room.

Well, because you and
DeLuca are the doctors.

Yeah, but Bishop isn't.

Is it 'cause of that thing with Beckett?

You accusing him of
drinking when he wasn't?

Yeah. That's... That's
probably what it is.

Alright, look.

We were in the corps
together, years ago.

We haven't seen each other
since then, but that bond...

That bond goes deep.

She promoted me because she
trusts me, plain and simple.

I think she just doesn't want anybody

to read into that the wrong way.

That's why she's being
overly formal these days.

So it's, um...

It's not because you're
trying to become captain

by taking down an innocent man,

and she has egg on her face

- because she trusted you?
- Beckett's not innocent.

- But he was clean.
- That day.

- [GROANS]
- Sorry. It just hurts.

♪♪

- Oh, my God.
- Oh, my God!

- A-Are those my toes?
- Those are your toes. Warren!

♪♪

Oh.

[CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY]

Oh.

- Erroll, is it? I'm Dr. Warren.
- Erroll, are you diabetic?

Not sure. I... I don't think so.

My toes started to turn a while back,

but I just thought it
was my bad circulation.

- Can you feel that?
- No.

Bad circulation is right.

Can I take a look at the other foot?

Ahh.

Yeah. This is diabetic
neuropathy and foot disease

until proven otherwise.

We need to get you to
Grey-Sloan as soon as possible.

- No, I don't have insurance.
- Ah-ah. We'll worry about that later.

Right now, you just need
to not lose any more toes.

Ohh.

♪♪

Okay, Jack, I know you're nervous,

but we didn't drive three hours

for you to just stare at the house.

This looks really nice, right?

Yeah.

Like, what do you think
he does for a living

to afford a house this nice?

- Alright, I'm ringing the doorbell.
- No. A-Andy.

Hi.

Jack.

- Hey, uh...
- Wow.

- Yeah.
- Huh!

Nice to, you know...

[CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY]

- I'm s... This is weird, man.
- For sure. I'm sorry. Yeah.

I'm Joshua.

Josh. Joshua.

Nice to meet you, Joshua
Josh Joshua. I'm... I'm Andy.

- I'm...
- Wife.

- No.
- Girlfriend.

- Uh, oh... Not girlfriend.
- Just a friend.

- Like a regular, really good friend.
- But almost ex-fiancee...

Cool. I mean, we...

BOTH: We work together.

Yeah, firefighters.

- Wow.
- Yeah.

I should have you guys take
look at my smoke alarms.

[FORCED CHUCKLING]

Do you guys want to... ?

- Oh, yeah.
- Cool, cool, cool.

Let's go around to the back.

- Oh, okay.
- Okay.

My family's inside. They're loud.

Right... Right this way.

Okay. Excuse me.

Oh. Sorry.

Listen, it's gonna be okay, all right?

[SCOFFS]

When we divorced,

she threw her World's
Best Mom mug at my head.

Should have realized then.

Oh, you just love telling
that story, don't you?

- Such symbolism. Always the victim.
- He told us who he is.

Our son told us who he is.

- Why can't you listen?
- She's a child!

She... She doesn't know anything yet.

He told us who he was a few years ago,

and Jane just freaked out.

She signed him up for...
a beauty pageant.

I should have taken him
away right then, but...

she's his mom,

and I thought she would come around.

It would have been nice
to be navigating this

with someone who got how I was feeling.

You know, someone who was going
through the exact same thing.

Trying to parent a kid

in a world that is committed

to rejecting him at every single step?

It's hard.

[VEHICLE APPROACHING]

- Oh, crap.
- Randall, honey. Thank God.

- Jane, what the hell?
- Where is he?

You are scaring my neighbors.

Well, what did you think would happen?
You kidnapped our daughter!

- You're not my dad!
- He's not your child.

- Don't make me go back, please.
- Okay.

It's all right, it's all right.

♪♪

It's alright.

[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS,
BABY BABBLING]

[CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS]

- Hey.
- Lieutenant Sullivan, can I help you?

I'm just saying hi.

Didn't we do that when I got here?

- [CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS]
- Pictures, huh?

- Mm-hmm.
- Okay.

I want to have a photographer
here again on the next clinic day,

but these will have to
do for the board meeting.

I want them to have a clear picture of

how... how busy it's
getting with word spreading.

See if we can get more funding.

- Hey.
- Hi.

Heard you got your interview.

- Congratulations.
- Thank you.

So you still don't like me, huh?

- I did not say that.
- [CONTAINER THUDS]

You're Italian, so your
body language... says it all.

- Is the new chief mad at you?
- Why would you say that?

I'm Italian. I pick up on body language.

You just said that. Ha-ha.

- Okay, alright.
- You planning any more of your moves?

Moves?

You got Maya demoted,
then you got a promotion,

then you reported Beckett.

You're talking to Warren, right?

I just want to make sure
that none of your future moves

involve my wife,
because we're about to...

We... are... [SIGHS]
... making a life here,

and a family, and it's important
for me that she's happy.

None of the things you just
mentioned are moves, okay?

They're just me looking out
for the team that I care about.

Mm.

[SIGHS]

JOSH: You guys... You guys thirsty?

Oh, uh, thanks. Wow.

- Yeah.
- That looks great.

Yeah.

Pitcher with the sliced
lemons. Very fancy.

- [CHUCKLES]
- That's how we do.

What do you do?

Not to be rude, but...

Oh, it's okay. I, uh, I'm in finance.

What's that mean?

Uh... I turn money into more money.

Gotcha. Yeah, I had a
friend who used to do that.

Oh, yeah?

Oh, my God. What is in these?

Wife and kids got super
into baking during COVID

and just haven't stopped.

It's become, like, a
whole family thing now.

I even get in there.

Me and Lulu made these last night.

Laura, my eldest.

She hates her name,

even though she loves my
aunt she was named after.

How many kids do you have?

Two. Almost three. My wife is expecting.

But then that's it.

A kid for every bedroom of
this house, and then we're done.

- It's a really nice house.
- Thank you.

We saw it and it looked so
much like the one I grew up in,

I fell in love.

My folks had to help us
out with the down payment.

So you... you, uh,

grew up in a nice house,
had a good childhood, yeah?

Yeah, I guess.

Played a lot of Little League baseball.

Uh, what about you?

Uh, no, not a lot of extracurriculars.

That's okay.

But, you know, it's
fine. I'm here, right?

The system's tough.
What are you gonna do?

- The system?
- Yeah, the foster system.

It sounds like you got adopted by

some really great... great
family, great parents.

Jack, I wasn't adopted.

What do you mean?

I, uh...

I grew up with our parents.

♪♪

Mom got... pregnant with you
when she was in high school.

She was pretty far along
before anyone found out.

She was terrified.

You have to understand
that both our parents

grew up poor and super conservative.

They wanted you to have a life

they knew they weren't
capable of providing.

You know, what are the
chances that you marry

and start a family with
your high school sweetheart?

Anyway, uh...

Dad's retired now.

He was a school superintendent.

Mom's a teacher. Part time now.

But she, uh, does crafts
with the kids all the time.

She's better with them
than she was with me.

Did you know... Did you...

S-Sorry, did you know about me?

Did they talk about me?

Mm. Uh...

When the...

genetic testing came
back with a match, um...

me, Vivian, Brooke, and Abby
confronted our parents together,

and they broke down
and admitted everything.

Uh...

- Brooke? Viv...
- My sister...

Your...

- Whole family.
- Our sisters.

[HEARTBEAT POUNDING]

They want to meet you, too, but
we didn't want to overwhelm you.

Mom says she didn't know where you were,

and even if she did,

it wouldn't be right to inv*de
and uproot your life like that.

She said you might not even
know that you were adopted.

Anyway, they'd like to meet you someday.

They wanted me to
make sure that I stress

that it's totally your decision, though.

Okay, okay. That's enough.

We're gonna leave, okay?

It's okay. We don't have to stay.

What do you want to do?

Let's go. Come on. Let's go.
That's enough for today.

- Okay.
- Okay, come on. Come on.

Hey, I... I'm sorry, man. Jack, I...

I didn't know how to...

To be honest, on the phone,

you sounded like you really needed this,

and I wanted you to know that
you had a family out there

who wanted to meet you, too.

Okay. Let's go.

Let's go. We're gonna go, okay?

I'm here.

I'm right here.

Can they put my toes back
on over at Grey-Sloan?

I'm afraid that might not be possible.

With this kind of decay, the
tissue has essentially d*ed

from lack of blood flow.

The diabetes has damaged
your blood vessels.

But... how... how did this happen
so fast without me knowing?

- You didn't have any symptoms?
- I didn't have any insurance.

You know, the foot's been
tingly and... and numb

for... for a few months now, you know?

Hard to walk, 'cause I
couldn't feel the floor.

But it never felt like
anything major enough

to go into debt over it, you know?

Thought I could just tough it out.

Well, we're glad you're here now.

- What do you do for work?
- Toll booth worker.

Eh, or I was before they
made them all computers.

[CHUCKLES]

Okay, Erroll. I'm gonna
call for transport.

Our aid car's out, but...

we'll get another one to
get you over to Grey-Sloan.

Sound good?

Alright.

That's gonna be like a
million dollars, too, right?

A-An ambulance on top of all this?

- No, no, no.
- All of our services here are for free.

Oh, no, but an ambulance or
an... or an aid car, whatever.

We're gonna figure it all
out for you, I promise.

I promise.

Thanks, man.

Yeah, I... I would hate to lose
my toes and my house, you know?

♪♪

I don't know how to explain
to my mother I'm a boy.

I know who I am, and I... I always have.

She would always try to explain away

why I didn't want to play
dress-up with the other girls

or why I cut my hair short.

What she doesn't understand is,

it wouldn't matter if I wore makeup

or ugly dresses to church.

I'm still a boy. And if I go back,

I'll never be able to
get gender-affirming care.

They'll force me to go
through a female puberty

that is going to make me feel...

- I'm scared.
- Yeah.

I'm scared of what that will do to me.

I'm scared I won't survive.

- Hey.
- Hey, so it looks like

Bryan has recently been
awarded full custody.

- Oh, good.
- Alright.

The kidnapping charges are dropped.

That's great.

- Uh, can I talk to my dad?
- Yeah, of course.

He's inside with the officers,
filling out an incident report.

- Okay.
- We'll see you in a minute, Matt.

Alright.

I think we can resolve this from here,
and we'll fill out the incident

- report and get it back to you.
- Mom!

It is my job to protect
her! Randall, help me!

- Mom, what are you doing?!
- Go!

- Mary! Mary!
- Hey! No, no, no!

- Go! Mary, stop it, please!
- THEO: Hey!

Randall, hurry!

- ♪ Come home to me ♪
- JANE: Go! Go! Go!

- ♪ Come home to me ♪
- We're going!

- [ENGINE REVS]
- ♪ Come home to me ♪

- [TIRES SQUEAL]
- Stop, stop, stop!

Stop, stop!

- ♪ Came home last night ♪
- Stop right now!

- ♪ Find myself waiting on me ♪
- Stop, stop, stop!

Get out of the car.

♪ Where you been? ♪

♪ How you been? ♪

- ♪ Who you been with? ♪
- [ECHOING SHOUTING]

♪ What you been doing wrong?

♪ What you've been doing ♪

♪ I can tell that we're
still moving on, moving up ♪

♪♪

♪ But love flows in endless ways ♪

[HANDCUFFS CLICK]

♪ Letting dreams transform the place ♪

But you're my daughter!
You're my daughter!

Get in the car.

Mary!

♪ Come home to me, come home to me ♪

♪ Come home to me ♪

Stop this! Mary!

Tell them that this is wrong!
I'm your mother!

♪♪

My name is Matt, Mom.

This is me. I'm sad for you.

I'm sad that you don't
want to get to know me

or the man that I'll become.

I'm sad that you're going to miss out

on loving me when I feel the most me.

Honey, I love you.

I'm trying to help you.
I am... I'm trying to save you.

Honey, you're a child. Y-You
don't know what's good for you.

I know that when you call me
"Mary," it makes me want to die.

Do you think me wanting
to die is good for me, Mom?

[ENGINE STARTS]

♪♪

♪♪

Hey, that was really brave, Matt.

- Her loss.
- Yeah, her loss.

But, Matt, if you ever need
more support or more help,

Station has clinic hours, okay?

- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

- Alright, you guys.
- Alright.

You got this?

Hey, uh...

consider relocating.

Consider changing your phone
number so they can't track you.

I'm not saying you can't
make up with his mom,

but sometimes when people
get told that they're wrong

and they really think they're right...

Just... be smart.

Be careful, okay? Good luck.

[SIGHS HEAVILY]

Sounds like you're
speaking from experience.

So, Erroll has been
admitted to Grey-Sloan.

How do you watch your
toes turn to black mush

and not get help, huh?

Well, he obviously needs
mental health care as well.

Yeah, something else this broken
system isn't gonna provide!

I'm sorry, but this is nuts.

I mean, that guy didn't
get his diabetes checked out

until his toes fell off because
he didn't want to go into debt?

I mean, what is that? And
what if we didn't have this clinic?

What then? What happens to Erroll,

- and all the Errolls out there?
- Yeah, but we do have the clinic.

Yeah, but it's not enough. And...
And if Dixon is elected mayor,

he's going to shut
this place down, okay?

This... This world is
a broken and cruel place,

and we keep putting people in charge

that are fixated on making it worse.

- He's not gonna win.
- We... You don't know that!

Have you seen the rest of the field?

He could very easily win,
and nothing terrifies me more.

I'm a first responder.

I'm great at problem solving,
but on this, I got nothing.

Well, I mean, you could run for mayor.

I can't do that.

Why not? Scared you're gonna lose?

No, because I think I could win.

Okay, yeah. Maybe
that terrifies me more.

I think you should do it, Travis.

I'll vote for you.

I mean, I don't even
have my green card yet,

- but you know what I mean.
- Wait, are we actually talking about

you running for mayor of Seattle?

Yeah. No. No. I don't know.

Not to actually be mayor,

but to just, you know,
make sure Dixon isn't.

I think you would win.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

But that's crazy, right?

- Yes.
- Yeah.

Like you said, the world is crazy.

♪♪

♪♪

- [CLUNKING]
- Oh, okay.

♪♪

♪♪

♪ When it's over ♪

Great.

♪♪

[GROANS] Flat tire.

♪ When it's all done ♪

- After this day?
- Yep, after this day.

♪♪

After this stupid, stupid day.

I mean...

now we're getting into
cosmic joke territory.

Yeah? What's the... What's the joke?

What's the lesson? What's
the point of any of this?

Here, I can...

The fact that they thought that...

they were protecting me
by... by staying away?

That... That... That's the joke.

I was just a kid...

A kid that they didn't want...

[GRUNTS] ... till they were
ready to have a good one?

Jack, what they did has
nothing to do with who you are.

- Come on!
- Okay?

Here. Do you know...

Ow! Oh!

Jack, okay. Wait, wait, wait. Here.

[SCREAMS, EXHALES SHARPLY]

I got you. I got you.

I got you.

♪ Amen ♪

Here, here, here.

I needed protection, you know?

I needed... I needed
somebody to bake cookies with.

That smug bastard who got
to live i-in that house

with those... kids and those parents.

[GRUNTS SOFTLY]♪ We say

You know, he... He didn't have
to suffer. He didn't have to...

♪ Amen ♪

[VOICE BREAKS] He didn't have to...

♪♪

He didn't have to get...

passed from predator to predator and...

♪ Amen ♪

And...

And all because our...

♪ Amen ♪

... our parents didn't want me.
They just didn't want me.

They just didn't want me.

- [SOBBING SOFTLY]
- ♪ Amen ♪

♪♪

♪ Amen ♪

♪♪

So are you gonna share?

Do I have to beg?

I had a friend when I
was a kid named Angel.

- Mm-hmm.
- He was my favorite person.

Made me laugh so hard.

He used to do these dirty puppet shows

with puppets he would make

- out of empty cans.
- [CHUCKLES]

So funny.

When we were in high school,

his mom and dad walked in on him
making out with this dude, Mike.

- Mike?
- Yeah.

- [CHUCKLES] Twist. Okay.
- Yeah.

His dad b*at the crap out of him.

But his mom...

- She had his back?
- No.

No, she kicked him out and
said he could never come back.

He was so funny. He was so smart.

He was such a good friend.

And his parents,

I mean, they put love into him
to make him that way, right?

They put love into him, and
then this one thing that...

This one part of him
that they can't accept,

that they can't understand, they...

and they just throw
him out with the trash.

- In Jesus's name, no less.
- [SCOFFS]

Well, what happened to him?

He slept on my floor for a few weeks.

Then his dad showed up
at my door with a shotgun.

- Whoa. Okay.
- Yeah.

My parents tried to talk to him,
but his dad wanted him out of town.

It's like, if they weren't
gonna love their kid,

then no one else was allowed to.

[SCOFFS]

- People are so messed up.
- Mm-hmm.

They're so stuck on their stupid
ideas of right and wrong and...

They can't see that hating
their own kid is just like...

Inarguably wrong.

Yeah.

Well, what happened to Angel after that?

I never heard him laugh
again, I can tell you that.

They wrecked him.

They poured all that love
into him and they just...

They wrecked him.

♪♪

♪♪

[BAG CRINKLES]

♪♪

Did you tell anybody
about what happened to you?

Yeah.

Then they would just, you
know, move me to a new home

a couple weeks later.

I think I wanted to meet Josh so bad

because... so much
of my childhood sucked.

I thought maybe...

I could borrow some of
his memories, you know?

Mm.

I hate that nobody protected
you when you were a kid,

and I hate that the person who
abused you got away with it.

They always do.

For every one of me,

there's a dozen other kids
who probably told nobody

because they thought what
happened to them was their fault.

Predators, they...

... they do what they do because
of that kind of thinking.

And... they can keep
getting away with it

because...

we... we carry around the shame
that... that belongs to them.

♪♪

There's... There's more of you.

What?

When we would get moved from the homes,

they would just... put another
kid in our place, right?

And... And the system doesn't
do anything about the abusers.

They... They just get new victims,

so... what Jeremy did to you,

chances are... he's
done to someone else.

- Oh, my God.
- Yeah.

- And we gotta find them, right?
- Yeah, we gotta find them.

We gotta get them to come forward.

I mean, he definitely
had done it before.

He knew what he was doing.

H-How... How... How do we
do that? How do we find them?

[SIGHS]

- I have no idea.
- [CHUCKLES]

[SIGHING] Oh.

Jack, I... I am...

I am so lucky...

you're my brother.

♪♪

♪ Once was enough ♪

♪ Realized everything turns to dust ♪

♪♪

♪ Everything to dust ♪

♪♪

♪ I lied in your words ♪

♪ When you said everyone has to go ♪

Wonderful.

Whatever you said to Sullivan,
I think you scared him.

Good. I'm sick of his moves.

[SIGHS] Well, I don't think
the Beckett thing is a move.

He definitely is a drunk,

but Sullivan is sleeping
his way to the top, so...

Oh.

You'll get back there, bambina.

♪♪

- Should we study?
- Mm. Now?

- Oh. Look.
- What?

Your left eye is bluer

- than the right one.
- Oh?

I'm gonna write that down on
the clipboard... Maya Bishop.

But first...

♪ Leave a light on ♪

- But first what?
- [BOTH LAUGH]

♪ I waited every day ♪

♪ You never came ♪

♪ To set it straight ♪

♪ I'll leave a light on ♪

♪ Leave a light on ♪

♪ Leave a light on ♪

♪♪

♪ Her face in a crowd ♪

Huh.

♪♪

I was cold.

- Mm-hmm.
- I was mean.

Mm-hmm.

- And I hated it.
- Mm.

Maybe a little too cold and mean,

'cause folks are noticing,
and they started asking questions.

[INHALES SHARPLY]

Damned if I do...

damned if I don't.

You know, a lot of people are wondering

about the nature of our... relationship.

Hmm. What'd you tell them?

That you're the one who got away.

Liar.

Don't call me that.

♪ ... things that I
could never describe ♪

♪♪

♪ I wanted everything to never end ♪

♪ Can we start again
and leave a light on? ♪

♪♪

♪ Leave a light on ♪

♪♪

♪ I waited every
day, you never came ♪

♪ To set is straight ♪

♪ I'll leave a light on ♪

♪ Leave a light on ♪

♪ Leave a light on ♪

♪♪