09x18 - A Second Chance

[bunniefuu]

What the... Ha ha ha!

It smells like a
catholic church in here.

What are you doing?

Meditating.

This might sound really
western of me, but why?

Oh, you're looking at the books

That nancy left you.

the once and future goddess.

Yeah.

'Cause, see, this is about if I
want to transform myself,

I have to totally reconnect
with my own inner goddess.

Mmm. Your inner goddess.

hinduism: the art of living.

Well, see, yeah, that's about
how action sculptures your life.

In other words, you can't
just sit there on your butt

If you want your life
to turn into anything.

Oh. Well, who would have thought

That common sense would
have been so ancient?

Yeah. And the cabala,

It says that only
% of us is physical,

While % of us is spiritual.

Oh.

So there's math involved.

No, jackie. Come here. Sit down.

I'll show you how to do it.

It's just like, ok...

You sit down, you
kind of relax, you know,

Open up your palms
and everything,

And you kind of let all your
worries and everything go.

You know, you just
kind of open yourself up

So that you feel free, you know?

And then just try to take
in just a feeling of calm,

Of kind of personal
power, you know?

[Inhales]

Concentrating on
this great feeling of...

Inner peace.

Um, before I forget,

I ran into dan at
the gas station.

He said he was going to
drop by and pick up jerry.

That bastard!

Without even calling first?

Like I was just supposed to
sit here on my butt all my life

Waiting for him?

Roseanne, calm down.

I will certainly not calm down.

He just go [bleep] himself

For all I give a good
[bleep bleep bleep].

♪ If what doesn't k*ll us
is making us stronger ♪

♪ We're gonna last longer ♪

♪ Than the greatest
wall in china ♪

♪ Or that rabbit with a drum ♪

♪ If there's one thing
that I've learned ♪

♪ While waiting for my turn ♪

♪ It's that in each
life some rain falls ♪

♪ But you also get some sun ♪

♪ And we'll make
out better than ok ♪

♪ Hear what I say ♪

♪ Yeah, any day ♪

[Knock on door]

Oop. Oh.

Hi. Hey.

Roseanne around?

No. David's still in chicago,

So she drove darlene
to see the doctor

'Cause she wasn't feeling well.

Everything ok?

Oh, yeah. It's just indigestion
or something like that.

Roseanne knew I was
coming to pick up jerry, right?

Actually, I think
that's the reason

Why she volunteered
to drive darlene.

I can understand that.

I'm not too crazy about
me these days either.

Well, come on
in. He's all ready.

Hey, buddy.

Hi.

Hey.

Do you want a soda or something?

Yeah, thanks.

So how's it feel to be
a captain of industry?

What?

I heard about how
you guys bailed out

The wellman plant.

Oh, I know. Can
you believe that?

The women voted most
likely to burn the factory down

End up saving it.

So is that why roseanne's
been seen around town

With edgar wellman?

Where'd you hear that?

Lanford's not exactly a
sprawling metropolis, jackie.

There's only
places to go at night,

And I was in the one place where
they were all talking about it.

Well, they've been, uh,
spending some time together,

If that's what you mean.

Do you want ice in this?

What does it mean,
"spending time together"?

What are you going to do
with jerry this afternoon?

Why are you answering my
questions with questions?

Am i?

Yeah, you are. Now
what's going on?

With what?

Come on, jackie, I need
to know about this.

Is there something going on between
roseanne and this wellman guy?

Dan, edgar is really
an attractive man.

He's very charming, he
comes from a wealthy family,

Not that they have conner money.

Come on, jackie, talk to me.

Does she have
feelings for this guy?

I don't know.

But he sure as hell
has feelings for her.

[Doorbell rings]

I'll get it as soon as I
finish paring my apple.

Hi.

Jerry: hi.

[Knocking]

Now, look, roseanne,
we're better than this.

I love you, you love me.

You know that.

Now it's been years

Before we even had one
doubt about this relationship.

I think that's pretty
good, don't you?

Yeah.

Yeah, well, we
should work on it,

You know, talk about it.

Darlene...

Me and your dad are in the middle
of something important here.

Do you mind?

Well, I'm in the middle
of participating

In the miraculous creation
of a complex human being.

The bedroom?

The kitchen.

Hey, dad.

Hey, son, how you doing?

Good. What are you doing here?

I just came to talk to your mom.

Could we have a minute?

Yeah. I just got to finish
filming the last seconds

Of this claymation movie.

Should only take a couple hours.

Take your time.

Ahem.

Darlene.

No.

Please? Please?

No.

Jerry: hi. Hi.

No. Now I'm reflecting on
all the mistakes you guys made

So I can break the cycle.

Too late. You're , you're
married, and you're pregnant.

You're me.

Porch.

Hi.

Bye.

Well, this ought
to keep us awake.

Yeah, every one of my
pores just slammed shut.

You know what this old
porch needs is a swing.

This would be an ok
conversation to have

In, say, july.

Look, uh...

About what happened
in california...

Yeah, hit me with it, dan.
I'm numb form the cold.

I was stupid.

I was incredibly,
incredibly stupid.

Don't forget thoughtless,
insensitive, and self-absorbed.

Well, I meant it as kind
of a blanket stupid.

What can I say? She was
there, she listened to me,

And I fell for it.

You could have called me, dan.

I know.

Every time you did call,

All you did was talk
about the weather.

Yeah, I know. It's
weird out there.

It's really hot all the time,

They got these el niños,

And they got the
santa ana winds.

I don't know if they're
the same thing or not,

But it makes it hot, and
it's really uncomfortable.

So is this the kind of
thing that she listened to?

Well, yeah.

Rose, I came...

I was this close to making
the biggest mistake of my life.

Yeah, you were, dan.

I know.

I'm sorry I hurt you.

About k*lled me.

I know.

I'm sorry for it.

I'd love to make up for it.

I mean...

I'll do whatever you say.

You just name it.

Good. 'Cause I got
a whole top list

I've been working
on for a few weeks.

Yeah, well, um...

Maybe if i, uh, kind
of start like this.

Well, I hope you're not just
hugging me to keep warm.

No.

But now that you mention it,

You want to go back in?

No. It's too crowded in there.

Oh, I got an idea.

What do you say we take
a ride up to lanford leap?

Hmm.

I'll bet the view's
incredible up there,

And that new car's
got heated seats.

It's got heated seats?

Thank god. I thought I was
going through the change.

So this is what's
become of lanford leap.

I guess it's not a make-out spot

Once they turn it
into a subdivision.

Remember right over there?

Man, if that guy's
carport could talk.

Yeah.

I don't know if I'd want
to build my living room

Over a bunch of old beer
cans and prophylactics.

Hey, dan, remember how
we used to come up here

And talk about the future?

Oh, yeah.

I was going to be an
all-pro defensive lineman

For the chicago bears.

And I was going to
change the world

With my pulitzer
prize-winning essays.

Gee, I wonder if old edgar
wellman ever came up here.

Oh, probably not.

His old man probably built him

His own private make-out spot.

All right, so what
have you heard?

Oh, nothing, nothing.

Just words like
"dashing," "suave"...

"Thin."

"Silver-maned adonis

Squiring my wife about town."

Well, if I had gotten squired,

I think I would have known it.

We did a business
deal, and that's it.

Anything else is
just a big rumor.

You know, we talked about how to structure
the buyout and these pension things

And these tax deals,

And the word
"debenture" kept coming up.

This the kind of thing
he had to listen to?

See? That's why
nothing developed

Because he expected
me to listen to him.

So you're... Available?

Squire away.

Would milady care to
accompany me to yon boudoir?

[Telephone rings]

Oh!

[Ring]

Hope that's not the people

Telling us to get away from
the front of their house.

Hello.

What?

No, slow down, jackie.

When?

Yeah. We'll be right there.

Dan, they took darlene
to the hospital. Let's go.

Thanks.

Sure.

Since when did you
start drinking coffee?

Today. Now.

Now's as good a
time as any, I guess.

Yeah, now I know what
all the fuss is about.

Hi.

What's going on? Is darlene ok?

She's ok. She was in a little bit
of pain when we first got here,

But she's better now.

She's in with the doctor.

So, where's the
kids? Where's david?

Mom's got the kids at home,

And david is still in chicago.

Did you call him?

I tried to call him

On both those numbers
that darlene left,

And I can't get him.

Why doesn't he
have a papa pager?

Because nothing was
supposed to happen by now.

He was going to get
one in a couple weeks.

Did the doctor say
anything about the baby?

No.

Oh, man.

Don't jump to conclusions, dan.

We just don't know anything yet.

Hello. I'm dr. Rudman.

Are you darlene's parents?

Uh-huh. What's going on?

Well, your daughter
went into labor.

We've given her a drug to
try to stop the contractions.

Labor? She's only
months pregnant.

That's way too early to deliver.

That's why we're trying
to keep the baby in the womb

As long as possible.

So far, she seems to be
responding well to the medication.

What about the baby?

Well, we have your daughter
hooked up to a fetal monitor,

And all the signs seem normal.

Thank god.

Yeah, um, how long
before they know anything?

Well, we're going to have to keep
her here overnight for observation.

Don't be alarmed. This
happens all the time.

Ok? She should be home
by tomorrow morning.

Oh, good.

Ok. So can we see her?

Yeah, sure, but only for
a couple of minutes, ok?

She needs the rest.

This way.

Come on, deej, let's
enjoy that coffee.

Hey.

Hey. How you doing?

How does it look like I'm doing?

What happened?

I don't know. I just
felt like I had the flu,

Like kind of funky and tired,

And then it just
kept getting worse.

Then these contractions started.

Did you go into labor?

No. They think that
it's, like, false labor.

Anyway, they gave me
dr*gs to take care of it,

And the doctor said
it's not too uncommon.

Yeah. Well, you don't
even look bad at all to me.

I don't know why they
even put you in here.

It's just probably
some insurance scam.

Yeah, you still look
like my little girl

Minus the attitude,

But that'll come back
when the dr*gs wear off.

You can save the pep talk for
when jerry gets to little league.

I mean, I know
what's going on here.

Come on, darlene, you're
pregnant with a conner.

You didn't expect it to be a
typical pregnancy, did you?

Yeah, conner kids usually
wait till they're or

To give you this much trouble.

Your child is obviously gifted.

I just hope the
baby's going to be ok.

Well, I know you're
scared, darlene,

But I'm sure everything's
going to be just fine.

Yeah, believe me, we're not going
to let anything happen to you

Or the baby.

I know. I just wish I
didn't have to be here.

Well, we wish you didn't
have to be here, too,

But, you know, pregnancy you
go through some tough times.

Then in the end,
it's worth the trip.

Yeah, right.

You said the same thing
about driving to gator world.

Yeah, but you got
a couple of t-shirts

And a hat out of that, right?

I'm glad you guys are here.

You know, I haven't had
any contractions in a while,

So maybe I can try to get
some sleep or something, huh?

Oh, yeah, we'll be outside.

How is she?

She's looking good.

She doesn't have any more
contractions for a while,

So she's going
to get some sleep.

Yeah, she's in good shape.

I mean, she's got to stay
here overnight and everything,

But she'll be fine.

So she's definitely
coming home tomorrow?

D.j., Doctors never tell
you anything definitely.

That's how they keep
from getting sued.

Yeah. You're not going to miss
any school on account of it.

Come on, d.j., Let's go.

Call me if you need anything.

Thanks, jackie.

She's going to be
fine, honey, I know it.

You want to do a
crossword puzzle, dan?

Because the nurse up on

That's got a whole bunch of
them behind her desk there.

No, thanks.

So why don't you go up
to the candy machine on ?

'Cause that's the only
one that they ever restock.

Stay away from the one on .

They still got
reggie bars up there.

Hey, you really know this place.

Well, did you forget?

I was here hours a day

When you had your heart att*ck.

I remember.

Well, I sort of remember.

Boy!

Having a kid in the hospital

Sure puts all your
stupid little problems

In perspective.

It really does.

Like, you know, I was really upset
with you about the whole nurse thing,

There, from the beginning.

I want you to know that
I knew you'd be back, dan.

I'm not going anywhere.

Good.

What floor did you
say had the best candy?

.

I think I'll go up there
and see what they got.

Why don't you just go home, dan?

There's nothing else
you can do here now.

It's late, you're tired.

Now, when you say "home,"

Do you mean home or
back to the hotel or...

No, I mean home, if
that's what you want.

Of course that's what
I want if you want me.

Yeah, I do want you, dan.

I love you, baby.

You, too.

Still not going home.

Well, then you better go round
up enough candy for the both of us.

Hey, which one had
that reggie bar?

.

Excuse me. Excuse me,
mr. And mrs. Conner.

How's darlene?

Can we take her home now?

Actually, I'm afraid the
contractions have started again.

She's asking for you.

Oh, god.

How you doing, sweetheart?

Not so good.

Where's david?

I don't know. He was on
his way home from chicago.

Well, he probably
just got delayed.

I heard on the radio there
was a big backup on the .

Oh, man.

Don't worry about it,
honey. We're here for you.

Isn't there something you
should be doing for her?

Darlene, apparently,
the magnesium sulfate

That we gave you earlier

Has stopped working.

Now, there is another
drug that we could try,

And it's called ritodrine.

Well, so give it to her.
What are you waiting for?

Yeah, go.

Well, this ritodrine

Can have some very
serious side effects.

I want you to know
if you take this drug,

We're going to have to put
you on a cardiac monitor

Because it can disrupt
your heart rhythm

And cause some chest pains.

You could also have shortness
of breath, fluid in the lungs,

And blood clotting.

It could even effect
your blood cell count.

Well, are there any side
effects for the baby?

Unfortunately, yes.

But considering the alternative,

I don't see how we have
any real choice here.

We will be monitoring the baby.

Well, then let's do it.

Darlene, don't you want
to wait and talk to david?

Those are some pretty
serious side effects.

I don't care.

Unless one of the
side effects is death,

Then I'm taking this stuff.

All I want to do
is save this baby.

Ok.

Then let's get started.

Hey, what if this doesn't work?

Well, let's just hope it does.

No. Come on, just
cut the crap here.

I just need to know
what's going to happen.

Mrs. Conner, this is
the drug of last resort.

If it doesn't work, she's going
to have to deliver the baby.

I'm sorry.