11x15 - High Sea Diving/Bottle Burglars

[bunniefuu]

- Are you ready, kids?

Aye, aye, Captain!

- I can't hear you.

Aye, aye, Captain!

Spongebob Squarepants!

Spongebob Squarepants!

Spongebob Squarepants!

Spongebob Squarepants! - Ready?

Spongebob Squarepants!

Spongebob Squarepants!

Spongebob Squarepants!

- Spongebob

Squarepants!

- Perch Perkins here

for Bikini Bottom News.

Today Spongebob Squarepants will attempt the impossible:

a high-sea dive from that diving board!

He'll be the first sponge ever to dive up through the ocean.

- Mow.

- Did you hear what Perch said, Gary?

The first sponge!

- Whoa.

- Pretty cool, huh, kid?

Okay, Gary, that's enough lard.

I gotta warm up.

Whaa...oh!

That's good. I'm all warmed up.

- Get your Spongebob standees here!

Buy one and take home a hero!

Here you are, here! Here!

- Hey, Spongebob. What's new?

Oh, so that's how it is, huh?

The silent treatment.

Well, two can play at that game, mister!

Excuse me.

How much for this stupid star fish standee?

bucks?

But it's damaged.

- bucks?

- Sold!

- Hi...uh!

- And here's our hero now

with the flag he will plant on the surface.

- Thank you! Thank you!

Thank you!

Ooh.

- Get your Spongebob standees right here.

Buy one and take home a loser.

- I just don't understand it.

Surface divers go down.

Why didn't I go up?

- Well, back in Texas, Olympic divers

have gravity to help them go down.

What you need is anti-gravity to go up.

- Anti-gravity? Yes!

Yah!

- Hmph. Stupid messy moron rubbernecking flounders

and so on...

- I'm doing it! I'm doing it!

I'm the first high-sea-diving sponge.

Hey, what happened to the surface?

Aw, gee, and I was so close.

What is this place?

This place is trash-tastic!

Oh, hey now!

Whoa-whoa-whoa-oh-oh!

- What's that?

- I don't know.

- It's a gift! - From the sky?

- From Neptune!

Yay!

Aww.

Thank you, Neptune!

- I'm sorry, honey.

I couldn't afford the whole house.

Just the door!

Whoa-ho-ho-ho! Look at that!

- Now there's room for my mother!

- Whaa?

- Hmm? I thought I saw something over...

- Hello? Who are you?

- I'm King Neptune!

Feel my power!

Old Man Jenkins?

- I'm not Old Man Jenkins anymore!

I'm King Neptune! Take that!

All right, I'll play along.

Hey, King Neptune! I'm Poseidon!

- Neptune is blessing us with gifts and treasures!

Surf's up, dude!

- Oh, yeah! All right! Ho-ho!

- You say your desire into the balloon,

blow it up, and send it to Neptune.

A slice of pizza.

- A never-ending roll of toilet paper.

- A million grandmas.

- You're not Poseidon.

You're Spongebob Squarepants.

- And you're Old Man Jenkins!

- I was Old Man Jenkins till I came here.

It was a year ago today...

- Oh, thank you, dea...

Hello?

Some help, please?

- So now I gotta go back?

I came all the way over here.

- Hey...hey, come back.

Come back, now!

- Neptune, I want a mustache.

- Neptune, I want a cool voice.

- Neptune, I want another balloon.

Now!

- My subjects! I must get down to help them.

- Well, we could build a ladder out of this stuff

and climb down...ooh, uh, down?

- What are you, senile?

- Uh-uh. I'm juvenile!

- Hey, what happened? - What's going on here?

- Why isn't Neptune sending more gifts down for us?

- We must have upset him.

- You must have upset him!

This is for you, Neptune.

Oohh... - Wait! Look!

- Oh, it's the most amazing thing I've ever seen.

- What is it?

- What do you think it is?

- It's a ladder from Neptune!

Let's climb up and get more free stuff!

- Me first!

It took every piece of the island to make this ladder.

Ooh? Hey! Look at that!

I'm the first sponge to ever do that!

- Big whoop.

- Oh, yes! It's the biggest whoop!

Let's go home!

- Stop shaking the ladder!

- I'm not shaking it!

- I think I see him! It's Neptune!

- Oh, Neptune! Neptune! - Out of my way!

- Wait a minute.

- It's Old Man Jenkins!

- Old Man Jenkins is Neptune?

- All hail Old Man Jenkins!

- Get off my trash, you idiots!

- Praise Neptune! We're all idiots for you!

We're all idiots!

We're all idiots!

Ooh-whaa!

- Hey, it's Spongebob!

- Everybody climb back down. There's nothing up there!

I dove up and found Old Man Jenkins

living among all these objects.

- Then it was you that you sent these treasures down!

- Hooray for Spongebob! He's our hero!

- No! Ahh!

Yahhh!

- I'm King Neptune!

King of the seven seas,

the lakes, rivers, puddles...

And spit too.

I'm the king of spit!

- So you're the king of spit?

- "Uh-oh" is right.

- I smell like toast.

Am I breakfast?

Needs jelly.

Ooh, well, look at that.

Someone threw away a perfectly good Spongebob standee.

Yagh!

Oof! Ugh.

- They called me a hero.

- Ooh...

Ooh... Yeah!

Don't you just love cleaning day?

- We're so lucky.

- Aww.

Mister Krabs's first dollar.

Whaa?

- Don't forget to clean the safe, boys.

And keep your eyes on the Krabby Patty Secret Formula!

- Hey, we need the combination!

- I got it covered.

- Nyah!

Doink!

Voilà.

- Ahh...ooh!

- See? This is fun!

Krabs will never see me coming!

Presso-inviso!

Can't see my own feet.

Don't you go anywhere while I clean your homey-womey.

- Out of sight...

- Out of my mind.

Hey, watch it!

Hommina-wah?

The Secret Formula!

Must be one of Krabs's tricks!

He'll pop out any second now.

Well?

Nothing. All right.

I really did it!

Hey, Karen, guess what!

I finally got the Krabby Patty Secret Formula.

How you like me now?

- It's genuine.

Come here, you big hunk of aquatic organism!

Ooh, I knew you could do it!

Just don't blow it this time.

Hey, Squidward,

have you seen the Krabby Patty Secret Formula?

I put it right here in this circular file cabinet.

- That's a trash can, you nitwit!

The formula!

- Face it, Spongebob! The formula...

- Don't say it! - Is gone.

- Oh. I asked you not to say it.

Why would you even do that?

- Come on.

Now let's see if the security cameras picked anything up.

- Hi!

I'd like to order...hmm...

half a Krabby Patty, please!

Oh, thank you.

- Ah! It's alive!

- Hold on.

Plankton?

What are we gonna do?

Okay. All right.

We'll just pretend everything's normal until closing time.

Then we'll steal the formula back from Plankton!

Yeah.

Come on! Open up!

Open Sesame.

It's no use, Karen. It won't budge.

- Of course not, Einstein, it has a time lock.

It won't open until tomorrow morning.

- Well, I've waited this long.

What's a few more

excruciatingly long hours?

- Night, Mister Krabs.

Sleep tight.

- Don't let the bed urchins bite.

- Eh, sure.

You, too, you two.

- Okay, let's go get that formula.

- Ooh, we are gonna pull a Plankton on Plankton!

Nyah! Whaa?

- Sorry.

Stepped on my tail.

- What are you wearing?

- I'm a cat burglar!

Okay, I'll change.

- Hang on. Ooh.

- And just how am I supposed to get in?

Ooh!

- Yeah, yeah, now eat her brain!

I love a good romance.

Phew.

- Goodnight, honey.

- What are you doing?

- Making sure he's asleep.

- Yeesh!

Squidward!

Aww, it's Plankton's little pet, Spot.

He wants to play!

- Will you get him off of me?

Get the stick, boy!

- Fetch!

- Look out!

- Diodes...zebras...

Make a new batch of chum...

- It's okay. She's in sleep mode.

- Oh, dear, the chum is escaping.

- This must be it.

- Remain still for retina scan.

- Now what'll we do? - Good thing I brought this!

They really captured the cute little dimple on his chin.

- Looks like they captured the rest of him too!

- I'll take it from here.

- I'm fine.

You go first this time.

- Hmm-mmph.

- You okay? - No!

- I'm standing still! I'm not even doing anything!

- Heh...sorry.

I can't believe that actually worked!

- Good morning, Krusty crew!

Ready to cook up a new batch of Krabby Patties?

Er...

Why are you two smoldering?

- We're sorry, Mister Krabs!

- No, he's delirious!

He doesn't know what he's saying.

- No! Mister Krabs deserves the truth.

We accidentally threw away the Krabby Patty Formula

and Plankton found it!

We tried to steal it back, but we failed!

- You did what?

Plankton stole me formula?

- That's what he said. Yeah.

- Then I'll just have to steal it back.

Don't worry.

Papa's here.

- Oh, yeah!

Who's the man?

You are!

Eh, man.

- No, no, no!

Krabs!

- I'm sure glad the formula is back

in the safe where it belongs, Mister Krabs.

Me, too, boyo.

And to make sure you two don't ever

take your eyes off it again, I have a surprise for you.

You're me new security system.

- Yay! - Wait!

I'm claustrophobic!