12x27 - Tonight, Tonight: Part 1

[bunniefuu]

Bullfrog:
this is the moment
you've all been waiting for.

Adam:
I rushed straight
from volleyball.

Did I miss anything?

You are just in time.

Bullfrog:
...high school battle
of the bands are...

From bardell high,
ascot mascot.

Let's hear it!

(Applause)

Imogen:
I spy with my little eye

A girl checking out
adam torres.

Adam:
with my luck,
she's looking at you.

I don't think so.

Bullfrog:
and look at this -

From degrassi,
where my son goes,

Whisperhug!

Maya: we got in?
Mo: we did it!

We got in?!

Yeeeee!

We did it!

Bullfrog:
next up, four madhatters
with a taste for the...

Maya:
so the last four winners
did covers,

So we should do
"superman's song."

Adam:
yeah. Our version
is awesome,

And people do like
a good sing-along.

Agreed.

Just don't say it
too loud, okay?

Someone might steal
our idea.

Bullfrog:
next up, from st. Mary's,

It's gritty country
storytelling

Meets inappropriate
band name...

Told you
she was looking at you.

Is that why she told me
to give this

To the cute guy
in the hoodie?

That's you.

♪♪

♪ Whatever it takes ♪

♪ I know I can make it through ♪

♪ And if I hold out ♪

♪ I know I can make it through ♪

♪♪

♪ Be the best ♪

♪ The best that I can be ♪

♪ Whatever it takes ♪

♪ I know I can make it ♪

♪ I can make it ♪

♪ I can make it through ♪

♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh ♪

♪ I can make it through ♪
(ooh-ooh-ooh)

♪ I can make it through ♪

♪ I can make it ♪

♪ Whatever it takes ♪

♪ I know I can make it through ♪

Becky:
uh, need a study buddy?

Dave:
you all right?

Me? Yeah.

I just really hate
becky baker.

Dave:
come on, man, why do you let her
get to you like that?

Hm, let's see...

Maybe because
she agreed to enter

A christian reparative
therapy program

To stop liking me.

I've been rejected before,
but that takes the cake.

Look, just never go
near that girl again.

Trust me, I won't.

Anyway, did you hear?

We made it into
battle of the bands.

Ooh!
And scored a number.

Who's missy?
Is she hot?

Way too hot for me.

She gave you her number!

What're you doing?

Getting the ball rolling.

I got her voicemail.
What do I do?

Leave a message.

(Muffled voicemail beep)
hey, missy. It's adam,

The impossibly handsome guy
you saw at the mall.

We should hang out
sometime.

Call me back.
Bye!

Nice!

Just like that.

J'ai, tu as, il a,
elle a, ils ont,

Elles ont, nous avons,
vous avez.

The verb is to have.
Present.

J'ai - I have.
Tu as...

You have.

Okay, let me try again.
(Clears throat) um...

Tu es tres belle.

Well, that's not gonna help you
during your exam,

But...

Tori:
oh! Uh, sorry! Sorry!

I'm sorry,
I'm interrupting!

No. No, no, no.
Not at all.

We're just going over
conjugation

For our oral exam.

Come sit.

Yeah, let's see
if you're as bad as I am.

All right.
Uh...

To lose, or perdre.
Future.

I feel like I'm losing zig!

(Scoffs)
that wasn't french.

Shhh!
Uh...

What makes you say that,
tor?

He's acting weird.

I think he might like
another girl.

Don't be silly!

Has he mentioned anyone?

No, but...

When we're together,

It's like
he's somewhere else.

You know, he probably
just has a lot going on -

Exams,
battle of the bands.

So I'm just overreacting?

You're overreacting.

We should get back
to verb conjugation,

Unless we wanna be here
all night.

(Car rumbles by)

(Sighs heavily)

(Sighs)

Heavy breathing.

Yeah, I'm stressing over
this calculus exam.

Well, just think,

Once you're in film school
next year,

No more math.

(Sighs)

Five, four, three,
two, one.

(Knock on the door)

Clockwork.

Come in!

Helen:
time for eli to leave.

Yes, eli,
time to run.

Clare.

Eli:
bye, mrs. Martin.

Mm-hmm.

In case you've forgotten,
I'm seventeen.

Kicking my boyfriend out
at sundown

Is a little much.

Get back to studying,
sweetheart.

I'm all studied up.
Straight a's guaranteed.

Good night.

Good night.

(Jake and katie laugh)

Oh, guess my mom
didn't catch you guys.

No guests allowed
past eight.

I know;
it's lame, right?

My dad said
it was cool, so...

Are you sure?
'Cause I was just-

No, no, no.

You are not allowed
to watch game of thrones.

We have to study.

Come on,
one more episode.

Please, please,
please!

Dave:
what was the "burning
of washington"

And why did it occur?

Adam:
it was an armed conflict in
in the w*r of .

Canadians att*cked the u.s.
(Phone rings)

It's missy.

Hello? Hey.

Tomorrow?

Yeah. Awesome.

Cool. Perfect.

We're going on a date!

"Awesome. Cool. Perfect."
It didn't give it away.

You were right;

This is exactly what I needed
to get over becky.

(Phone dings)

Speak of the she-devil.

What?

Becky sent me an email.

Look, don't give her
that satisfaction.

Delete the email.

Well, shouldn't I
at least read it?

Delete it.

Okay, done.

You know what
really sucks?

Becky and I would have worked
if I wasn't trans.

Come on, man,

You know
that's not your fault.

What if I didn't
tell missy?

You sure
that's a good idea?

It's not like
it's the only thing about me.

I wanna know what it's like
to be a regular guy,

Like you and drew.

I need fun.

What, you mean having
gender identity conversations

On a first date
isn't fun?

Not quite.

(Both laugh)

(School bell rings)

Maya:
hey.

Whatever it is
you're doing, stop.

Uh, why can't I review
molecules?

I'm pretty sure

They're gonna be on
the science exam.

Maya:
no, dummy.
I'm telling you

To stop being weird
with tori.

Zig:
why? She send you
to talk to me?

It doesn't matter!

You and I agreed

That everything
would go back to normal.

This isn't normal.

I didn't agree,
you did.

And besides, it's kinda hard
to forget after we kissed.

Shhh!

This isn't a joke,
okay?

I'm with cam.
Tori is my best friend.

And I'm the big bad wolf?

You don't have to be.

Please, just be nice
to tori.

Please.

Okay.

Thanks.

(Relieved exhale)

Hi.

Hi.

Jakey!
Mind if I sit for a sec?

"Jakey."

Hmm.

Want half?
It's turkey swiss.

Uh, did you know
that turkey swiss

Is my number two
all-time favourite sandwich

After chicken salad?!

No way!

(Chuckles)
yeah. Yeah.

Good, huh?

Mm-hmm.

Hey, have you noticed
a double standard

In our house?

Not really.

Eli having to go home
at eight...

And katie getting to stay
until all hours of the night.

Ring a bell?

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

I knew there was something fishy
about this!

Wait.
Just-just wait.

Eli's going away
to university next year,

And I wanna spend as much
time with him as I can.

So I have a plan,
and you have to help me.

I do?

Our parents are going
to the craft fair later.

You have to call my mom

And tell her that eli's
coming over

To study with you.

So then, when she comes home,
she can't kick him out

Because he's your guest
and not mine.

What do I get
out of this?

A very happy stepsister?

(Laughs) okay.

Thank you!

You're welcome!

(Streetcar rumbles past)

Drew:
so does this missy know
that you're f to the m?

No, and I plan on
keeping it that way.

At least,
for the first date.

I'm just gonna pass
and have a good time.

But if you don't tell her,

You'll never know
if she's cool with it.

Name me one girl
who has yet to be cool with it.

Drew:
all right.

Here. Take this.

It has brought me a lot of luck
with the ladies.

I recommend pairing it
with a t-shirt and...

Ugh! I tasted that.
Thanks.

What?

I have a question.

What happens
if things get...hot?

I got the ol'
compression vest.

It's all good.

Okay, but what if missy
gets grabby...

You-know-where?

Relax, drew.
It's a first date.

It's happened to me
on first dates.

Once,
it wasn't even a date.

(Chuckles)

Just in case.

You're crazy.

You're the one
not telling her the truth,

So better to be safe
than sorry.

(Spray hisses)

So close,
yet so far.

My mom will be gone
any minute

And then we can be together
at last.

She's coming.
Quick! Do math.

Jake:
so, let's start
with the radius.

Eli:
that doesn't sound right.
Radii!

Jake:
hmm...

Have fun at the crafts fair,
mom!

Glenn called,
he has to work late.

But since we haven't had
mother-daughter time

In a while,

You're coming with me.

Uh...
I... I should study.

Helen:
yesterday,
you said you were done.

"Straight a's guaranteed."

That doesn't sound
like me.

Um, I like crafts.

Do you mind if I join?

Don't you and jake
have to study?

Hurry! I'll wait
in the car.

Thwarted!

Well,
at least we tried.

Obviously,
you don't have to stay.

I'll see you tomorrow.

Mm.

Make a sock monkey
for me!

Yeah. Shut up.

Tori:
zig's not texting me back.

(Doorbell rings)

I talked to him.

What did he say?

That nothing's wrong.

He's just busy,
like I said.

(Doorbell rings)

Katie, get the door,
I'm studying!

Katie:
you're such a lazy...
Urgh!

You're such a lazy-
urgh!

Uh...

Tori:
zig?

Zig! I, uh, told him
you were here.

That's why he came,
right?

Yeah! Yeah.

Tori:
come sit next to me.

Dude, you only brought
two bags of chips?

Don't your parents own
the convenience store?

Uh... Yeah.
Brain fart.

I uh... I should've
brought more.

Oh, ketchup.
Your favourite.

Uh, maya,

I was listening
to "superman's song"

And was wondering
if we should add harmonies.

I recorded
the rehearsal.

Why don't we see
what cam and tori think

While we grab drinks
in the kitchen.

(Whisperhug's pop version
of "superman's song" plays)

♪ Tarzan wasn't a ladies man ♪

♪ He just come along
and scoop 'em up ♪

♪ Under his arm like that ♪

♪ Quick as a cat
in the jungle ♪

♪ But clark kent,
now there was a real gent ♪

♪ He would not be caught ♪

♪ Sittin' around
in no junglescape... ♪

Missy, hey.

Hey, adam.

You wanna go for a walk
or something?

Sure! Uh, there's this
vintage store here

I wanna check out,

Get something to wear
for battle of the bands.

Did you hear?

They announced a major
celebrity guest judge

For tomorrow.

Who?

Chaz bono!

He's here on his book tour
and he agreed to do it.

No way.
The chaz bono?

Yeah, my mom talks
about him.

He used to be a she
on the sonny and cher show

Or something.

That's... Cool.

Oh, here it is.

There's something different
about you.

Oh yeah?

Yeah. You're not like
other guys.

How so?

I don't know,
you're polite.

Relax.
It's a good thing.

Zig:
okay, look,

I didn't know that
they were gonna be here.

Makes me feel much better.

I needed to be alone
with you.

How thick is your skull?

Nothing can happen
between us.

I know you're with cam,
all right?

I just needed
to tell you that...

After exams
and the battle of the bands,

I'm gonna break up
with tori.

No. No, no, no,
no, no, no.

Zig:
you were right.

You told me to be nice
to tori,

And it's not nice
to be with her

When I like you.

Zig, you can't do that
to her.

I can't lie anymore.

Adam:
how's the dress?

Ridiculously tight.

I might need help
zipping up.

Do you mind?

Not at all.

Um, should I cover my eyes,
or...?

You can uncover your eyes.

How's that?

You tell me.

♪ Put you in the back ♪

♪ Keep your head up see ♪

♪♪

♪ Letters on maps ♪

♪ You keep pestering ♪

(Something thuds
on the floor)

Oh, I think you dropped
your phone.

Um... Is this yours?

♪ ...just taking it all away ♪

♪ On a better day ♪

♪ Gonna finally say ♪

♪ I'm never gonna leave you
with the ropes... ♪

Jake:
look how fast I'm going.

Look how fast I'm going
right now.

Jake...
(Laughing)

Like a race car.

(Laughing) jake!
Jake! Come back!

They're coming, man!

Clare:
hey, jake, can you help us
unload the... Car?

(Air freshner hisses)

Uh, eli,
you're still here.

And uh, jake,
you've got skates on.

This isn't weird at all.

Yeah, well,
we finished studying

And decided to chill.

(Eli laughs)

You smoked weed again.

A bit, yes.

Clare:
my mom is on her way in.
If she catches you high-

Go upstairs and splash
some water on your face

And hide in my bedroom.

(Air freshener hisses)

Okay, seriously,
stop spraying.

Helen:
jake, skates in the house again?

You're gonna muck up
the floors.

Did eli go home?

Jake:
yes...

Wasn't that fun,
clare?

I don't know which project
to start first:

Knit tea cosy
or door hanger?

Door hanger.
Definitely a door hanger.

(Air freshener hisses)

Missy:
wait! Adam!

Adam, wait up!
Adam!

I really don't feel
like explaining.

Dude, a pickle fell
outta your pants

While we were making out.

I think I deserve
an explanation.

What's the sitch -
stack of dimes?

No...

Because you know
what they say...

Something about the size
of the boat

And the motion
of the ocean?

There's no boat.

I'm ftm, like chaz.

"Love, peace,
and rock 'n' roll"

Was the motto in my house
growing up.

It doesn't bother me.

Are you just saying that?

I'm having fun
with you -

And I have a thing
for bass players.

Especially when
they open doors.

You never told me what song
you guys are doing tomorrow.

Superman's song.

It's a sick arrangement.

Starts slow,
then kicks in.

Definitely a crowd pleaser.

Sweet!

Listen, I should go back
and pay for this dress.

When I get back,
we'll grab dinner?

Street meat?

The works.

Hold the pickles?

Don't go anywhere.

(Happy, relieved sigh)

Shhhh.
Sleep time.

No, no, no.
Not sleep time.

Up time.

You told me
to go to bed.

I told you to go
to my bedroom.

Come on!

I like your bedroom.

How are you
at jumping out windows?

Um...

It's high.

I'm high.

I'm sorry,
I'm such a bad boyfriend.

I gotta-

Yeah.
Yeah, you do.

Sorry.

Mom,
i-i can explain.

Do you think
I'm a fool,

Sneaking eli around
like this,

Right under my nose?

I wasn't.

Oh, so eli wasn't just naked
in your room?

I'm seeing things now?

Okay. He was hardly naked,
mom,

But just listen
because I can explain-

Is he a druggie?

I'm not stupid,
I know what this is.

Eli is not allowed
to set foot in this house

Ever again.

That is not fair!
It's not even his!

Whose is it, then?

It's jake's.
He gave it to eli.

Oh...

Is this yours?

We didn't smoke
in the house.

Helen:
glenn will deal with you
when he gets home -

And take your damn
skates off!

Yes, ma'am.

(Blows out his breath)

Two hot dogs,
everything on 'em.

Becky:
adam?

You've gotta be kidding.

Are you following me?

I'm getting dinner
with my dad.

He just left
to look for parking.

Better hide.

Wouldn't wanna be seen
with an abomination.

Don't say that.

Did you read my email?

No, becky,
I didn't read your email.

I don't want
any more emails.

I want you to go away!
Go far, far away.

It's not working!

The therapy.

It doesn't cure feelings.

Sitting there every day

Only reminds me
that I like boys,

And you're a boy...

Between the ears
where it matters,

And no therapy or prayer
will ever change that.

That's what my email says.

That's what I've been
trying to tell you.

Missy:
ugh! I'm starving.

Oh, friend of yours?

No one important.

♪ To bend our will
behind our backs ♪

♪ And hold us down
till we say ♪

♪ When will this be over?
When? ♪