06x08 - Rhyme for Your Life/For Whom the Bell Tolls

[bunniefuu]

# Every day you walk down the street Everybody that you meet

# Has an original point of view

- # And I say, hey!
- Hey!

# What a wonderful kind of day We can learn to work and play

# And get along with each other

# You gotta listen to your heart Listen to the b*at

# Listen to the rhythm of the street

# Open up your eyes open up your ears

# Get together and make things better By working together

# It's a simple message And it comes from the heart

# Believe in yourself For that's the place to start

- # And I say, hey!
- Hey!
- What a wonderful kind of day

# We can learn to work and play And get along with each other

# What a wonderful kind of day - hey! What a wonderful kind of day - HEY! #

- Hey, DW!
- Hey...

Whoa!

Heart -

check.

Pendulum - check.

- Raven...
- Never more, never more!
- ..check.

The works of Edgar Allen Poe. This should be great!

- Remember when Ratburn did Dracula?
- I was in the front row!

My sweater still has ketchup on it! I'll save us seats. See you inside!

It's YOU! What's with the outfit?

- Are you part of the show?
- Come here. Give me your ear.

I'll tell you a tale that will FILL you with FEAR.

- But the show's almost starting!
- It happened long ago,

in a land far away. I was shopping for my mom, before her birthday.

I thought that was last week.

Can I tell my story, geek? I don't interrupt when YOU speak.

- OK! But what's with all the rhyming?
- All will be clear to he who sits

and listens for min-its!

Six of those, eight of those and a dozen of the things with cherries.

- All in a big heart-shaped box!
- That'll be . .

. ?

What can I get for ?

Oh.

Well, at least I can buy Mom a nice card.

"You make me smile when I feel crummy, I'm glad you're my Mummy"?

Yuk! ..Hey, Muffy, what are you doing here?

Ailie's birthday is coming up. I found one just for chauffeurs.

"Who says good help cannot be found? Thanks for driving me around."

- Isn't that sweet?
- I guess. It's better than the cards for mothers.

BUYING a card for your mother? That's SO tacky!

- Why not make your own?
- I'm no good at writing stuff like this.

When I said "make", I didn't mean YOU had to!

PAY someone to do it!

It's a great sandwich - I only took one bite! I'll throw in the pickle!

Sorry, poems are personal things!

Look within yourself and find the perfect words.

But I want it to rhyme, and I have no rhymes inside! Just some salami.

Check out this poetry anthology.

Read the greats. THEY'LL inspire you!

Mother dear, I love you so. If I bend my head,

I can smell my toe.

Oh! That doesn't make any sense.

Thanks a lot, Daintee, Baudyliar and Intosakeshangay!

You've been no help at all!

I couldn't make a rhyming poem if my life depended on it.

- Cosy, sweetums?
- Oh, I am a terrible son!

Ah! Ah! Hey! Who took my comfy chair?

Hey!

Whoa! Slow!

Could you tell me where I am?

Verseburg! Step away from the horse!

Go indoors, the curfew's at nine.

Don't you know, it's a crime not to rhyme?

Giddy-up, Buttercup! NEIGHING

Oh, great! This is a RHYMING nightmare!

Why can't I have the one where I'm eaten by a clam?

OWL HOOTS Hey, watch where you're going, klutz!

- You made me spill my berries and nuts!
- Uh, sorry...Charlie!

Charlie? I don't know who THAT is. You need to wear glasses.

I'm Clementine, the daughter of Dr Rhymenstein. Are you a stranger?!

You must be in danger! Better come with me, immediately!

Those are my trees and this is my road. I used to have bees,

but now I have a toad! GROWLING

Another helping of peas? Or perhaps a slice of cheese?

How nice to have some company - the villagers avoid me. I'm hated

because of that monster I created!

Monster?!

I mean... Oh, no!

I wanted to make a thing of beauty, but used the wrong voltage

and it all went ker-plooey!

ROARING

Yikes!

The purple orange! My hideous child which has no rhyme!

Head for the hills while you have time!

Aghh!

YOU, FRIEND!

Put me down, you brute! I don't even like NORMAl fruit!

Let me go, you purple foe!

OK, sir, what did you see? State the facts slowly and clearly.

Me, Binky! Me see... Oh, this is too hard! Look, a giant purple orange

ate Dr Rhymenstein and kidnapped his daughter.

- Hans! ..Franz!
- But...
- Insufficient poetry is a Class D felony.

You want me to believe that's fat? I bet YOU ate the doctor and his brat!

Move it, Bub! Or we'll use the club.

Don't I get a lawyer or phone call?

No phones in here. Just snail-mail.

- I'm William Carlos Williams.
- Binky. I guess YOU can't rhyme either.

Well, sure I can. Slime, sublime, waste of time...

I just choose not to. I'm a political prisoner.

FREE VERSE! FREE VERSE!

Ah, what's the point? No-one listens. But you're in luck, son.

- There's a way out!
- There is?

I dug it with this pen - took me years!

Hmm. It would be good if we had a set of wheels.

Aha!

PANTING

My arms are k*lling me!

- Be happy I'm not Sylvia Plath. SHE'S a heavy poet!
- I'm sure to meet her.

They'll find out I can't rhyme and I'll be back in jail!

Oh, you'll get the hang of it, son. Take my old rhyming dictionary.

Find that orange and clear your name. The people will know who's to blame.

Ah! They've gotten to me!

MOOING

OWL HOOTS

Cock-a-doodle-doo!

Food! Mister, can I have an egg?

Um, my name is...Meg. I'm from...

Win-Winnipeg. Don't make me beg!

C-C-Can't feel my toes! Or fingers, or nose!

- Hey! I'm getting the hang of this.
- Queen of these peels,

go feed the seals!

Ugh!

This blubber tastes like rubber!

Clementine!

ARRRRRRR!

- Stay away!
- Oh, great! After he eats YOU, we'll need a bigger igloo.

- GRRRR!
- Aa-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-h-h-h-h!

THEY ALL SCREAM

That's called a barbaric yawp. Some guy named Walt Whitman taught me it.

CROWD: Hooray! Hooray! We're saved!

You k*lled the monster, set us free,

and turned him into delicious fruit tea.

The people present you with this mounted barracuda,

caught by our founder, Pablo Neruda.

CHEERING AND WHOOPING

Wo-ho! What an amazing dream!

I'll just write THAT down and give it to Mom! She'll LOVE it!

YAWNS

I'll do it in the morning.

Think! THINK! There was a castle and a...a...

clam! No! That was another dream.

Aw-aw-aw-aw!

I forgot the whole thing!

Binky! What a lovely card!

Oh! Nothing's written in it.

I know. I wanted to write you a poem, something pretty and rhyming,

but I couldn't think of anything, so I left it blank.

- I know you meant well, dear. It's OK!
- No, it isn't!

I mean, Mom, you're always so sweet and nice. You listen to my problems,

you give me advice. If I'm in trouble, I turn to you.

A poem is the LEAST I could do! But I just couldn't.

It's hopeless, you see. A gorilla could rhyme better than me.

You can't rhyme? That was beautiful!

Oh! You're right! And it even made sense!

Maybe I'm wrong and I'm NOT dense!

That's a table, that's a chair, that's a man with no hair!

Lamp, clock, belt from karate, stain where I dropped manicotti.

Wahoo! Amazing, I feel so giddy! I'm the best poet in Elwood City!

Thus ends my tale of woe. Now you can go and listen to Poe.

What's sad? Sounds like your mom had a GREAT birthday.

Don't you get it? Now I can't STOP rhyming.

- Have you HEARD the words I'm combining?
- Oh!

I see the problem. Did you try...?

Hypnotism? Yes. Soup? You bet. Prunella gave me a garlic amulet.

Eeww! Maybe you just have to find something you CAN'T rhyme,

- something really hard.
- It doesn't exist! This is scary.

I can rhyme every word in the dictionary.

It even happens with names, Arthur. Like a rhyme for yours is...is, er,

Barthur? Carthur? Darthur?

M-S-N... There's... Arthur! There's no rhyme for Arthur! I'm free!

Yes!

Thanks!

It's a good thing he didn't run into the Brain.

Tonnes of things rhyme with HIS name.

Uh-oh!

Alas! Poor, miserable me, a prisoner of poetry.

Today was just about the best day in my entire life.

I say that a lot, but this time it really was!

And all because of DW...

So then she said, ahem, "If you buy them both,

"you get a frilly pony blanket at no extra charge!"

CROAKS AND COUGHS

DW? What's the matter with your voice?

HOARSE VOICE: I don't know!

Aah!

WHISTLES

Time for bed, honey.

OK. So what's the matter with DW?

- Is she sick?
- She seems fine, actually,

but she's definitely lost her voice.

Yes!

Did I hear that correctly? She's lost her voice? Wowee!

CHEERING

No more, "I don't like that show, it's scary. I wanna watch Moo-Cow."

Kids like that spoil the ratings.

Well? What are you waiting for?

CHEERING

CROWD CHANTS: She lost her voice!

She lost her voice! She lost her voice!

Isn't it great? DW lost her voice!

I heard. You're being mean, Arthur.

- M-E...
- Later, Francine!

Hey! Make the car do some tricks!

Arthur!

Ssh!

ALARM CLOCK BEEPS

What a great dream!

Hurry up, DW, we're gonna be late!

Oh, no! Did she get her voice back?

WHISTLES

There you are!

So, um, how's your voice?

Don't look in the mirror TOO long, DW, you might break it!

You can't talk! You can't talk!

DW? That's enough brushing! We have to be at the doctor's soon.

- And, Arthur...be nice.
- Yes, Mom.

- WHISTLE
- Yes!

It was the most peaceful morning.

For the first time, I could actually hear my cereal.

- Why would you want to listen to cereal?
- No! I meant, y'know!

Anyway, just think how great my life will be if DW can't talk!

# The best word I know is F-U-N F-U-N spells fun! Fun is nice!

- # I love fun... #
- When Gladiators Ruled The Earth. Cool.

You don't mind if I switch, do you?

Thanks, DW.

They ruled with rippling pecs and righteous abs. It's Man Versus Beast,

coming up next on Gladiator Smackdown.

You are MEAN, Arthur Read! M-E-A-N, mean!

I know how to spell, Francine!

Anyway, I'm NOT being mean.

I just want some peace and quiet for a few days.

It could be more than a few days.

People can lose their voice for months. Years, even!

Really?! I mean, really...

Wow, that's too bad.

It's still quiet!

Man, this is gonna...

- Oh!
- Oh! I'm glad you're home.

DW has laryngitis and she'll have to stay in bed.

Oh, poor DW! I'm so sorry to hear that.

- I have a lot of work now, so I'll need your help.
- You can count on me.

KNOCKING

- HOARSELY: Come in!
- Sorry, DW, I didn't hear you.

What do you want?

Yes, I see the book, but what do you want?

Sorry, DW,

I just have no idea what you mean.

- See ya!
- Here's your bell, DW!

Just ring it when you need something.

We heard you loud and clear, honey!

What do you want?

Did you get that? She wants you to read her a book.

..I'm sure he'll be happy to read it!

- He's promised to be very helpful. ..Right, Arthur?
- Right.

"And so the bashful minnow was crowned queen of all the starfish.

"The End." Blah! That is the last book I am ever going to read to you.

CROAKING

Ugh, stop that!

You're creeping me out!

She actually thinks this is writing!

How could anyone possibly understand that?

Actually, it's pretty clear. This is how she spells her name,

and this looks like you, Arthur! And this must be a bowl of ice cream.

She wants you to bring her ice cream and play Crazy Eights!

- What? It can't mean that!
- I know it's a lot after all that reading,

but I do need your help this week.

Poor DW, she's so sick and tired... Where is that ice cream...?

It's only days, but it feels like a year! I'm a prisoner in my own home.

Even worse, I'm the prisoner of a really bad mime.

I have fluffy unicorn outfits, DW. How many do you have?

Huh?

Ow! She's saying, "I've so many, I can't even count them.

"Way more than !

"I probably have sixty-ten, even!"

ALL LAUGH HAPPILY

"Thank you for coming to my party, but how come there are five of you

"and four gifts? Who's the hold-out?

"No cake until I get that present! No cake, no ice cream,

"no lemonade..." Hey! It's not me, it's her! Hey! Ow!

She can't be that bad if YOU understand her!

That's just it! Except for Mom, I'm the only one who does.

What if I have to spend my whole life speaking for DW!

That's what you get for being mean.

Don't say I didn't warn you!

Aw!

Francine's right, Pal.

I AM being punished.

I shouldn't have been so happy when she lost her voice.

I told you not to get ill! You've to go to hospital for stitches!

- You don't have arms, so I can't hold your hand!
- You're better!

I'm free!

FREE!

Stop faking! I saw you!

I heard you!

Mom! DW's faking. I heard her talk! She was talking to her doll!

- She's FAKING!
- Why would she do that?

Because...she LIKES being sick.

- She gets what she wants and
- I
- am her sl*ve.
- But DW also LOVES to talk,

so if she seems sick, I'm sure she is. I know this has been hard on you,

but it won't last too much longer.

The doctor says she can get out of bed as soon as her voice comes back.

What am I doing in your room?

I'm, er, I'm...

fluffing your pillows!

There! All fluffed!

This will PROVE she's talking!

- # Mary Moo-Cow... #
- Aa-a-a-h!

This movie is called DW, The Liar.

I'm just about to enter her room

and catch her in the act.

OK, here goes. One...two...

three! Aha!

Wait a minute,

where is she?

Aaargh!

Aw-aw!

She knows I know! So now she's being careful, and I'll never catch her.

- I told you, that's what you get for being...
- Quit it.

It's not like YOU'VE never been mean.

You can't remember being mean?

I'm trying! PHONE RINGS

Hello? ..This is weird. I'm talking to a bell.

Aw!

What do you want?

- DW COUGHS
- Uh-huh? No! I told you already,

I'm not playing Slap Jack any more.

OK, I'll play, but only one game.

OK, two games, but that's it. Bye!

You understood that?

This calls for something drastic. Give me that phone!

- Thanks. It's great when you can count on friends.
- Don't get mushy.

I didn't want you losing your mind. BELL RINGS

WHISPERS: Not one single sound.

- What if...?
- Buster!
- I need to...

- Stop!
- ..cough!

- NO COUGHING!
- She's coming!

What are you waiting f...?

NO SOUND

Mom! I've gone deaf! I can't hear what they're saying!

I lost my voice and now I've lost my ears!

I mean...

Caught you! See, Mom? DW's voice is perfect.

I DO see. What a miraculous recovery, young lady.

LAUGHS NERVOUSLY Arthur learned a lesson, too.

From now on, he'll LISTEN to me! ALL LAUGH

That was the best thing ever, hearing good old DW's voice.

I missed my voice. Hi, voice! Hi, stairs! Get off me, Pal!

- Aw!
- Hi, computer! Hi, lampshade with the hole in it Arthur made!

# Hey!

# What a wonderful kind of day We can learn to work and play

# And get along with each other

# Listen to your heart

# Listen to the b*at Listen to the rhythm of the street

# It's a simple message And it comes from the heart

# Believe in yourself For that's the place to start

# And I say hey! What a wonderful kind of day!

# We can learn to work and play And get along with each other - HEY!

# What a wonderful kind of day - HEY!

# What a wonderful kind of day! #