a letter for which hamatha
oh thank you kind sir
uh postage to my lady a postage do
postage do
[Music]
an invitation to compete in the miss
dark ages beauty show
those other hags don't stand a chance
[Music]
my skin is so dry
one of the drawbacks of gossiping with
the dragon
oh
drier than ever
oh
i do hope great grandma dog of this
beauty book will have a solution
oh
let's see
curly toenails purple teeth oh here we
go
oil of smurf softener for dry skin
take one smurf rub it on your face every
day when the blue is all rubbed off it
is time to use a new smurf
sounds like a little flight to smurf
forest is in order
there are oodles of little smurfs out
there just dying to get under my skin
goodbye louise
[Music]
sorry lacy that's okay
i won't lose any sleep over it
[Music]
i hate springtime
[Music]
[Laughter]
[Music]
this is the smurfiest springboarding
i've ever seen yes it is papa smurf
mother nature should get an award
why brainy that's a fine idea
hmm why not
mother nature deserves an award
where my little smurfs i'm off to mother
nature's i will give her these 100
flowers as a token of our appreciation
for this glorious day
oh good idea papa smurfy
[Music]
a brilliant idea if i do say so myself
as i said to papa smurf when someone
spurs something outstanding as i have
done on so many occasions he should get
an award you want an award i'll give you
an award why thank you
[Music]
jokey somehow that wasn't what i have in
mind
yes clumsy the more i think about it the
more i'm convinced papa smurfs should
give an award to the smurfs who have
spurfed the smurfiest contribution to
the world of smurf huh but papa smurf
isn't here then i'll give the award i'll
call it the golden smurf award
ye hear ye
that means hear me hear me
competition for the first annual golden
smurf award is now open
uh what's a golden smurf award
i don't know but i must have it
the golden smurf award is the most
wonderful honor a smurf can win
it will go to the smurf westbourne this
year's murphy's contribution to the
world of smurf
i could enter my goodies i could enter
my music
[Music]
i could enter my face
just bring your entries here tomorrow
night and we'll all vote to select the
winner oh i must get to work on my
masterpiece
mastercase wait to be sure it is worthy
of the marvelous gold and smurf award
and i must get to work on my poem on my
goody and my surprise
little do they realize no one can
possibly outsmurf my contribution the
most brilliant literary work of our time
quotations from brainy smurf
[Music]
now to practice my acceptance speech
dear losers
to make a long story longer let me start
by relating to you the most fascinating
tale of all time my life story faster
you beast i haven't got all year
my skin will turn into sandpaper unless
i get my hands on a smurf right away
if you ask me this new berry picker is a
shoe-in for the golden smurf award candy
handy handy you are going about this all
wrong what do you mean this little
machine is too ordinary
to b*at the competition it's gotta have
razzle dazzle
boom in short you have to have a uh uh a
gimmick oh
but i like it the way it is
mark my words if you want to win you've
got to have a gimmick a gimmick what's a
gimmick
a gimmick my dear fellow is that little
extra something special that will make
your contribution stand out from all the
rest a gimmick ahem
it all began when i was a little smurf
and papa smurf said to me brainy how did
you ever get to be so talented and i
said well papa smurf i was just born
that way and he said
oh these flowers should have a good
chance of winning the award smurfette
you've got to be kidding those flowers
are humdrum mediocre run of the mill if
you want a wind you'll have to have
giant flowers or or paint them a
spectacular color oh but i like them the
way they are mark my words smurf and if
you want to win you've got to have a
gimmick a gimmick a gimmick oh
[Music]
[Music]
i want to win the golden smurf award but
this just isn't fun anymore don't worry
smurfette you have absolutely no chance
of winning anyway
none of you do
the obvious winner is my contribution
quotation from brainy smurf face it
smurfs this book has it all
drama humor
action
they're just jealous because they know
i've got them b*at
i'll display the golden smurf award as a
constant reminder of my undeniable
[Music]
greatness i haven't decided yet what the
golden smurf award will be
it must be something every smurf would
love to have like an autographed copy of
quotations from brainy smurf but i
already have mountains of those
[Music]
whoa is me where shall it be
huh a smurf award a smurf award my
glasses for a golden smurf award
[Music]
perhaps
a hand that will reach all the way to
smurf village
this award must be something with which
to console myself through life's ups and
downs something that in my old age i
could gaze upon
hello where did this come from who cares
it'll make the perfect golden smurf
award
oh this is so exciting tomorrow night
they'll declare me the winner and you'll
be mine oh my god
the smurfs will be mine all mine as well
i'll hide you in a nice safe place so
the other smurfs will be completely
surprised oh
they'll be surprised all right so
surprised they'll jump right out of
their little blue skins
[Music]
i hate dressing up i wonder who'll be
the first to make my own smurfiest dress
list good evening grouchy i wonder
who'll be second
[Music]
oh gosh lacey if we want to get to the
golden smurf awards on time we better
run
why run when you can walk
why walk when you get sick
why sit when you can fly down
why be awake when you can't
[Music]
[Music]
well this gimmick is ruined my machine
and my flower and my head my masterpiece
but it will all be worth it if my
gimmick my gimmick my gimmick my gimmick
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
oh i can't wait to see that golden smurf
award i can't wait to see who wins
attention everybody please attention i
said attention
that's what i'm trying to get your
attention so you'll give me the golden
smurf
awards underneath
as i was saying the moment to vote is at
hand
in this box is the prize we've all been
striving for the golden smurf award
oh gosh i can't wait to see what it is
i can't wait for you to see what it is
either
all right everyone take your last look
at the contestants and vote for the
smurf of your choice
[Music]
and now it's time to mark your balance
may the best smurf win and may that
smurf be me
me me
me yeah
[Music]
[Music]
well my friends the votes have all been
cast i shall count them in the privacy
of my home so i can compose myself
before giving my acceptance speech
on the other hand it would probably be
less of a painful to count them right
here
one vote for
greeny smurf yeah
i want to thank all the little
insignificant spurs out there who made
this possible just cozy votes bunny but
why go on when it's obvious i am the
unanimous choice
[Music]
all right all right
one vote for
painter's smurf
yay
one vote for
greedy smurf yes
i'll eat the latin
one vote for
harmony smurf
[Music]
which is
oats welcome to the 900th annual miss
dark ages beauty show
featuring the most bewitching old hags
um
i mean enchantresses
in the land
yay
i notice haggarth is late again as usual
i hope she never shows up she always
ruins the show every year she either
snorts a medley of outdated songs or
does it ridiculous hardcore
i hate to be the bearer of smurfy news
but it appears that everybody and i mean
everybody voted for himself we have a 98
way tie i hate ties
every smurf voted for himself and i for
one am shocked wait there are 99 smurfs
but only 98 votes this does not make
sense
oh gosh i'm afraid it's all my fault
you
i just couldn't smurf up my mind well
why didn't you say so yeah have a slice
of cake yeah
how about an autographed copy of my book
oh buddy
oh pal friend if you've got half the
good sense i think you do clumsy you'll
vote for my smurfberry picture i will no
no no you'll vote for my cake it's very
unique oh yeah sure is
oh that takes a joke
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
[Music]
[Music]
i'm sorry but i i just can't choose
between my friends then we still have a
tie maybe you do
ahem
in case of a tie the master of
ceremonies casts the deciding vote and
since i am master of ceremonies i vote
for myself therefore i brainy smurf and
the winner
[Music]
i'm so happy for you and now with the
great humility which has become my
trademark i present myself with the
golden smurf award
and may i be the first to congratulate
you
oh smile for your life
get off my head you fool what do you
think i am a bird's nest
[Music]
so i can rub you against my face for the
rest of your lives
[Music]
ah it's always a joy to return to the
peace and harmony of smurf village
great smurfs of fire 97 98
99
this should be enough for a lifetime
home james
oh
hurry feathers follow that snort no more
dry skin for me
[Music]
oh
the hour is growing late i must get down
to
i might business well start with the
handsomest of the bunch
uh-oh
you'll do just fine
farewell my friends
i hate farewell let's see now
six rubs on each cheek seven on the nose
five on the elbows and two on the toes
yes
oh
am i rubbing you the wrong way
you might say that
sorry
[Music]
skin oh no no no
what's wrong now
you're not using that old formula are
you that went out ages ago it did
believe me when it comes to beauty aids
i know i'm an expert expert you are
what would you suggest
a mud bath but i've had my bat this year
believe me i know what i'm talking about
if it's soft skin you want there's
nothing better than a magic mud bath
much better than oil of smurf hmm
i've always had a fondness for mud
vanity is absolutely right there is
nothing that can be the magic mud bath
for dry skin
this is all your fault
there we are almost done
[Music]
perfect
this had better be worth it
we give you our word when we are through
with you you will not be just another
pretty fast in the crowd
[Music]
[Music]
is it really much farther papa smurf not
much farther
is it much further papa smurf yes it is
[Music]
i'm sure it does if it doesn't itch it
isn't working believe me you'll look
great oh please let me out i'd rather
have dry skin let me out and you'll
never hear my snort near your village
again i
and we're going to see that you keep
that promise
i've done it asriel i've done it i've
done it for years i've worked to perfect
my instant misery muck and at last
nothing
[Applause]
and now for the final touch and voila
instant misery
so you see papa smurf we were all
competing for the golden smurf award the
golden smurf award what in the world is
that we were voting to pick the smurf
with the smurfiest contribution to the
world of smurf and i have yet to recover
from the agony of defeat like this is
the unsmurfiest thing i have ever heard
of
all of your contributions are of equal
importance they cannot be compared
who thought of this foolish award in the
first place
well naturally i felt the smurfs were
crying for a way to honor me and
naturally i thought this would be the
best way
like i always say you've got to have a
gimmick
unfortunately i just didn't have the
right one