02x05 - The Minstrel's Shakedown

[bunniefuu]

A calm afternoon on the floor of
the Gotham City Stock Exchange.

And in boardrooms
throughout the country.

But what's this?

This can't be
happening. I'm wiped out.

I made a fortune today.

My only problem now is whether to
buy amalgamated or consolidated.

Cortland, you're the president of the
exchange, what do you make of this?

I don't know. I've never
seen anything like it before.

And while it's true the stock exchange
has had some wild days in the past...

never in its history has there been
anything comparable to this day.

It began shortly after
2:00. At that time...

Good afternoon, my friends.

Where did he come from?

Who is that?

A helpful Minstrel I
When I see folks in trouble

Then I come on the double

With counsel both
soothing and wise

With counsel both
soothing and wise

Ooh. Isn't he attractive?
So gentlemanly.

For fair remuneration

I'll wipe the tears
from your eyes

I'll wipe the tears
from your eyes

- Is he talking to us?
- Apparently.

This message is for members of
the Gotham City Stock Exchange.

Gentlemen,
salvation is available.

The Minstrel's Friendly Stock
Brokers Protective Association...

would guarantee you immunity
from a repetition of today's calamity.

How thoughtful.

I'm sure you'll agree the fee is
reasonable for the protection provided.

$1000 per week per
stock exchange member.

That's blackmail.

Make your checks payable
to account number 007...

and airmail them each week to the
Broccoli Bank in Geneva, Switzerland.

I'll expect notice of your agreement to
this in tomorrow's Gotham City Times.

Let me emphasize that 100
percent participation is essential.

- That's a quarter of a million dollars.
- We'll fight him. Call a TV station.

TV station, nonsense. I'm
calling Commissioner Gordon.

What are you gonna
do, commissioner?

There's only one
thing we can do.

Commissioner Gordon.

Yes, indeed.

I have the same thought.

But who was that?

That was Mr. Brook Cortland. President
of the Gotham City Stock Exchange.

I shall alert him
to your call, sir.

- It's the...
- I suspected.

We were watching, Commissioner Gordon.
We'll be right there. To the Batpoles.

Atomic batteries to
power. Turbines to speed.

Ready to move out.

A minstrel who is also
an electronic genius.

- What a strange combination.
- Not at all, commissioner.

Music and electronic energy
are both transmitted by waves.

Which obey almost
identical laws of nature.

A logical pursuit for a musician
with a twisted criminal mind.

Of course, Batman, you are
right. I wouldn't have thought of that.

Commissioner.

- Oh, Mr. Cortland.
- Commissioner.

Batman, this is Mr. Cortland. President
of the Gotham City Stock Exchange.

Glad to know you.

I think we have a mutual friend, that
upstanding philanthropist Bruce Wayne.

Yes, I've heard him
mention your name.

And of course, Robin,
the Boy Wonder.

- How do you do?
- How do you do?

What happened
here this afternoon?

The quotations going out over
the Trans-Lux went completely wild.

Some high, some
low, but none right.

Orders started pouring in at the false prices
and it was, well, it was just a disaster.

Do all the quotations go
out over a single transmitter?

- Yes.
- Hm. We better check that installation.

Who is this Minstrel?
Where did he come from?

How did he get on
the TV program?

The station has no
explanation at all.

Apparently, he simply overrode
the signal from the studio...

to the transmitter
with a stronger one.

I don't know anything about this man
but I intend to know more about him...

before we're through.

Would you show us the transmission
room in the exchange building?

Of course. Could your secretary
place a call for me, commissioner?

Bonnie.

My name is Putnam, Batman.
Something I can do for you?

- And my name is Cortland.
- Sorry, Mr. Cortland. I didn't see you.

- Go right ahead, Batman.
- The transmitter seems perfectly in order.

- It's been constant since we had to shut down.
- Did technicians check the coding circuits?

- At all levels?
- Yes.

However, I'd like to
see them for ourselves.

By all means. This way.

The circuits are in here.

Holy transistor's bill.
What an installation.

Have you seen anything
suspicious, Batman?

- Hey, look...
- No, Robin.

Everything seems to
be perfectly in order.

No signs of tampering.

I told you he wouldn't
catch it, Octavia.

I guess we'll just
have to keep looking.

Right, Batman?

Yes, Robin. We'll just
have to keep looking.

He does have a warm,
attractive voice, doesn't he?

So what? He's still a
second-rate genius.

You're just like all
the women, Octavia.

Taken in by his phony
mystique and his...

His warm, attractive voice.

Don't complain.

I'm pretty taken in by your warm,
attractive voice too, you know.

Ohh, well, that's
better. Ha-ha-ha.

Thank you, Mr. Putnam.

You can return to your duties.

Some of the circuits definitely
have been tampered with, gentlemen.

And I wouldn't be surprised if he planted
a microphone in the installation too.

So he could listen in
on anybody checking it.

How devious and brilliant.

Exactly.

This Minstrel could present
one of the most deadly threats...

we've ever had to deal with.

The devil you say.

How do you wish
to proceed, Batman?

That depends on how he proceeds.

If he thinks no one is wise
to him, he may be back.

And we'll be waiting for him.

Just tell me how many
men you'll need, Batman.

None. The slightest suspicion
that it's a trap could scare him off.

Sure, and it could at that. Oh,
that stick in the head, that is.

As always, we'll play
it however you wish...

but we can't help being
concerned about you.

- Commissioner Gordon, after Penguin...
- And Archer.

- Clock King...
- And King Tut and Catwoman.

And all our other
artful adversaries...

I don't think we'll have too much
of a problem with this Minstrel.

- Dinner time, sir.
- Ah.

A peanut butter and watercress
sandwich and a glass of milk...

- would have been sufficient, Alfred.
- I know, sir.

But I can't help worrying about
the two of you occasionally.

The long hours, the
meals you often miss.

I hate to see this dual life
you're both leading taking its toll.

Robin and I still have
a few good years left.

However, I do
appreciate your concern.

We'll dine in a moment, Alfred.

But first, I'd like to get
the kinks out of this bug.

Kinks out of the bug, sir?

It's a bugging device with which we
hope to trap our latest adversary, Alfred.

Oh. Would that
be the Minstrel, sir?

Yes, it is indeed, Alfred.

You've heard of him, then?

Oh, Gotham City's
heard of him, sir.

He seems to have most
of the women swooning...

over his so-called
gentlemanly charm.

And most of the men
in a state of panic.

Including, if I maybe allowed
the personal reference, myself.

- You, Alfred?
- In panic?

Well, I have managed to save
a tidy little sum on the side...

and made what I hope are some
wise investments on the stock market.

You too, Alfred, wiped
out by the Minstrel?

No. Not exactly wiped
out, Master Robin.

I did manage to go down to the stock exchange
this morning while you two were in town...

and it certainly is chaos.

Yes.

Chaos.

Whatever do you suppose
the rascal's up to, sir?

What he told all of Gotham
City via his TV jamming device...

blackmail or calamity...

but we intend to prevent both.

And how do you
intend to trap the culprit?

If I may be so inquisitive, sir.

I suspect he planted
a microphone...

in the transmissions room of
the stock exchange building.

And tonight, he'll be back to
check on it. So we fight fire with fire.

We plant a microphone
and we check on it.

There's one thing
that worries me.

Getting back into that
building without being noticed.

I'm sure that can be handled.

- Yes, Batman.
- Commissioner.

Could you arrange
with Mr. Cortland...

for Robin and me to return to the corridor
outside the transmission room tonight?

I'm sure he'll
cooperate, Batman.

And perhaps find us an
isolated office for a short time.

You mean a temporary hideout?

I can't go into details, commissioner.
I'm sure you understand.

I'll contact Mr. Cortland at once,
Batman. But let me repeat now.

Please, please be careful.

Who knows what devious tricks
this evil balladeer maybe up to.

You have my assurance.

"A Wandering Minstrel."

- That's the same tune he sang on TV.
- Right, Robin.

- You think it could be some kind of signal?
- Yes, it could, old chap.

Let's take a look. Easy now.

Oh. Oh! Do you always
sneak up on people like that?

No.

That's okay. You here
kind of early, aren't you?

So you were expecting us.

Are you kidding? They told
me to expect a new replacement.

I just didn't know
there'd be two of you.

Anyhow, you got here.

Glad you wore your old
clothes. This jam is a mess.

Good evening, gentlemen.

Holy rainbow.

I'm blinded.

An ingenious device.

Good night, Batman
Good night, Robin

Good night, Batman I'm
going to leave you now

Ha-ha-ha!

I don't understand.

How could he have gotten away?

Commissioner, we were half
blinded by Minstrel's electronic flashes.

Ah-ha! Ah.

Apparently, we interrupted him
before he could remove the last of these.

You mean that tiny thing
caused all the trouble?

Yes. And there was one for
each number's circuit of course.

What is it?

A heterodyning counter-oscillator
would be my guess...

- and a marvel of miniaturization.
- Mm.

To confuse the frequency.

So each number has to
come out anything but right.

Commissioner, all Gotham City is in danger
while this musical criminal is at large.

He exhibits a degree of
electronic sophistication...

far beyond anyone
in the world today.

He exhibits a degree of
electronic sophistication...

far beyond that of anyone
else in this world today.

Except me of course.

If, as I suspect, he spotted
the counter-oscillators by now...

he knows the place was bugged.

Smarter than you thought he was.

You're absolutely right, my dear.
He must be eliminated after all.

We can count on him to come to us. All
we have to do is be certain we're ready.

Well, how do you mean
you can count on him?

He's waiting for me to
go on the air again, Bass.

So he can use our
signal to lead him to us.

So we'll work from the studio,
not here. See that it's ready, Treble.

But how can he use our signal?

Unless he's a bird.

The beam is so narrow, he
can't even pick it up on the ground.

He'll work out some
way, you can bet on that.

Fascinating bird,
sir. What is it?

It's a Batdrone plane, Alfred.

We can direct it from
here by remote control.

Direct it?

Yes, if the Minstrel
goes on the air again...

and I suspect he will,
if only to taunt me...

I think this bird should
pick up his wavelength.

And locate his broadcasting studio.
- Mm.

There we are.

Robin, let's test the drone.

That could be the studio signal.

Raise the level.

That's it. Perfect.

The Minstrel may
be in for a surprise.

I believe you're right, sir.

Here comes the brazen fellow.

I've offered the
brokers a fair way out...

but as yet they haven't
accepted that plan.

In status that driven
to mistrust and doubt...

they've turned for help
to Robin and Batman.

The audacity of it.

Getting anything?

The Batdrone's changed course.

It's pick up the
studio signal, all right.

But I foiled the
dauntless duo before.

With nothing more startling
than a spark and a flash.

And though v*olence...

is something I strongly abhor...

I warned them that next
time they'll land with a crash.

- It's descending, Batman.
- At what angle?

- Eleven degrees, four minutes.
- Eleven degrees, four minutes.

Well, that should put the plane down
somewhere over Gotham Park Lake.

At the intersection of
Willow and Fourth Street.

There's nothing there, Batman.

Except the old Willow
Street Warehouse.

That must be it.

It's been a long night. It's going
to be a big day. Let's get going.

Alfred, bring the plane back.

- Me, sir?
- Yes.

- Throw the Batdrone retriever switch.
- I...

Oh!

We can be expecting the
Caped Crusaders any minute now.

- This early, boss?
- You can bet they've picked up the signal.

They're on their way.
Just be sure we're ready.

Cameras all set, Treble?

I just love suspense like this.

Well, it's too bad, the suspense
will soon be over, Octavia.

Look, no door knobs.

I know. This must be the place.

And the broadcasting studio
is probably on the top floor.

Stand clear. Up we go.

All right, men.

Alert the boys in the storeroom
and put Plan Low C into action.

What a pity, Robin...

that a man of his musical talents, who could
bring such pleasure to millions of people...

should pervert that genius
to criminal antisocial ends.

Especially when he could earn
a good living from just records.

- Look. That open window, shall we try it?
- Yes, Robin.

The opportunity well-taken is
always a w*apon of advantage.

Be careful. It may be a trap.

It is a trap.

Pow! Wham! Look
at the Dynamic Duo.

They are efficient, aren't they?

Do you think
they'll win, Minstrel?

Holy fly trap.

You're making a
mistake, Minstrel.

With your genius, you could be a
tremendous force for good in the world.

Why waste it?

I was regretting the necessity
of doing away with you, Batman.

A kindred genius, you know.

But if there's anything I
can't abide, it's a reformer.

Activate the turnspit motor.

Motor activated.

In just a few
minutes, gentlemen...

we'll be prepared to serve barbecued
crusader if we have a call for it.

You see, we've installed just beneath
you, super units of a radar type grill.

As you revolve, it can turn you
from rare to medium to well done.

Depending on the preference.

Throw the switch.

Switch is set.

Holy hot spot, Batman.
What can we do?

Nothing, Boy Wonder.
Nothing but cook.

Are you sure this is
a good idea, Minstrel?

Good? It's perfect.

Besides, my dear, there's no
alternative. It's Batman or the Minstrel.

The world isn't ready for
both of us yet. Heh, heh.

Batman and Robin
Rotate and revolve

As the heat grows
Your bodies dissolve

When it's still hotter
Then you will melt

Nothing left but
your utility belt

Is this it, Batman?
Is this the end?

If it is, Robin...

let's...

not lose our dignity.