07x12 - 10 - 1 =

[bunniefuu]

Hij: Hee, hee, hoo...

Hij: Hee, hee, hoo...

Hij: No good. I'm not budging an inch.

Oki: Tenko, you won't get anywhere with that method.

Oki: You gotta strike while the iron's hot!

Hij: Wasn't this your idea—

Sign: Jyubei's Request: Watch this program in a bright room and at a safe distance from your TV!!

Tae: A-Amazing.

Tae: You took them all out in the blink of an eye.

Tae: I don't believe it.

Tae: Your efforts have put all the men to shame.

Jyu: Yes.

Jyu: Ayao-dono, Tsukuo-dono.

Jyu: It's all thanks to you.

Tsu: If you want to thank someone, thank this guy for inviting the Hyakka

Tsu: to a ninja course.

Sar: Seriously. Who knows what might've happened had we not come here.

Kag: This must be a star of fate at work.

Kag: When a hero shines most brightly, his radiance attracts other heroes to his side.

Kag: We owe it all to you, Cao Cao.

Tae: We're underground, Kagura-chan.

Jyu: Instead of relying on those idiots, we girls should've—

Gin: Wow!

Gin: Way to go, boys!

Gin: We actually would've loved to help out,

Gin: but we had to act feminine, right, Goriko?

Kon: That's right.

Kon: In true feminine style, we figured we should stand aside and cheer you on.

Kon: Right, Ginko?

Shin: But really, you've all become so awesome.

Shin: I-I couldn't believe my eyes.

Shin: Especially those two ninjas. Aren't their specs too high?

Kon: I prefer the hunk with the ponytail.

Tae: Who are you calling a hunk?

Oki: I prefer the porktail.

Oki: It'd be delicious barbecued.

Hij: Nobody was talking about barbecue.

Sac: It's too late to notice my charms, Ginko-san.

Gin: No, I never said anything of the sort.

Sac: Now that our genders have been swapped,

Sac: I frankly feel no attraction to you at all.

Sac: Why has Sakata Gintoki, of all people, been degraded to a useless sow?

Sac: Why have you accepted that appearance?

Sac: Man or woman, you were never that kind of person.

Sac: You would look much better

Sac: in this, I'm sure!

Sac: Hurry up and change!

Gin: You pig!

Gin: In the end, you're still as deviant as ever!

Sac: It'd look amazing on you now!

Sac: Please!

Sac: I'll pay you , extra!

Gin: I'm not a prost*tute!

Shin: Hey!

Shin: It might be the same old routine,

Shin: but it looks so much more perverse now that she's a man!

Kag: Do you mean , in reinforcements?!

Kag: Good. Bring out the dosh.

Shin: No, it's not good!

Tsu: Stop that, Sarutobi.

Tsu: No matter how much of a man she may be inside and out, she's still a woman.

Tsu: Flowers have no inherent beauty or ugliness.

Tsu: It only exists in the eye of the male beholder that cannot admire both equally.

Gin: What's with this guy?

Gin: How'd an innocent girl turn into such a playboy?

Tsu: No need to worry, Ginko.

Tsu: Protecting women is the Hyakka's job.

Tsu: Relax and leave yourself in my care.

Tsu: I know of a job where you earn a lot more just by having a bath with customers.

Gin: I'm telling you, I'm not a prost*tute!

Shin: He's like some evil pimp! A scary scout from the city!

Kag: Do you mean a s**pland?

Kag: Good. Bring out the dosh.

Shin: I told you, it's not good at all!

Kon: What? Pork?

Kon: Bring out the Tosh.

Hij: Shut it, morons!

Tae: It looks like your new genders suit you much better.

Tae: Maybe things would be better this way.

Gin: Don't say that! It's terrifying!

Tae: Well, do you really think you could

Tae: outdo these high-spec men if you went back to normal?

Tae: Are you saying that even though you were useless,

Tae: you'll shamelessly go back to living life as deadbeat men

Tae: thanks to their efforts?

Tae: If that's the case,

Tae: it'd be better if you stayed as women and let Tsukuo-san take care of you.

Tae: By working in Yoshiwara, you'd contribute much more to society than as men.

Tsu: Leave it to me.

Hij: What the hell do you people think women are?!

Kon: Yeah! Are our bodies all you're after?!

Hij: Who contributes what doesn't mean jack!

Hij: What matters is that we get our bodies back, no matter what!

Hij: Found anything yet?!

Hij: There's gotta be a vaccine or something to turn our bodies back to normal!

Ymz: Sorry, Vice Chief. There doesn't seem to be anything like that here.

Jyu: That's not all.

Jyu: I don't see the archbishop anywhere.

Gin: What's that supposed to mean?

Gin: Don't tell me this wasn't their base—

AB: No. That is definitely our Earth Dekobokkoist base.

Jyu: Y-You're—

AB: However, attacking the base will not necessarily solve all your problems.

AB: Unfortunately for you, what you're looking for has long since left that planet.

AB: That said, we did observe everything you people have been doing

AB: through your sword, Kyubei-san.

Jyu: My sword?

Jyu: A bug?

Jyu: No way!

AB: I told you that God is always watching you, didn't I?

Jyu: Damn you!

Jyu: What are you after?!

AB: God has chosen you.

AB: Like us, you are neither man nor woman...

AB: An unsullied being worthy of being God's apostle.

AB: Yagyu Kyubei,

AB: God has been watching you, and he wishes to entrust you

AB: with this planet's fate.

AB: During this trial, he has seen some of you being manlier than anyone else,

AB: and others being nothing more than useless b*tches.

AB: Kyubei-san, you have splendidly upheld the teachings of Lord Dekobokko

AB: and overcome his trial.

AB: In light of your devotion, we...

AB: No, God shall keep his promise.

Jyu: What are you trying to pull?!

AB: Yagyu Kyubei,

AB: you are most suited to being Lord Dekobokko's apostle.

AB: From now on, you must guide the people of Earth

AB: and correct this planet's erratic gender roles!

C: Target is showing a high energy response!

C: No way!

C: Are they gonna fire the virus cannon again?!

C: sh**t it down!

C: Stop the satellite before it fires the virus!

AB: Yes.

AB: With that gender you attained for yourself.

C: Hey, look at this!

C: My body's back!

C: It's true!

C: We're back to normal!

Jyu: The town has gone back to normal...

Gin: ...except for those of us who were underground.

Gin: What the hell is this? Are you kidding me?!

Hij: Why are we still like this when we're the ones who overcame the trial?!

Gin: I show Lord Dekobokko a little respect, and he lets it go to his head!

Gin: Want me to k*ll you, bastard?!

Hij: Just kidding! She didn't mean that!

Hij: Fire the virus one more time!

Hij: Please! Just one more shot!

PA: Attention, everyone in the Kabuki District.

PA: The attack satellite which was aimed at Earth

PA: has been safely destroyed.

PA: Martial law will now be lifted.

: I repeat:

Kyu: Despite sensing everyone freezing up behind me,

Kyu: I found myself unable to turn around.

Kyu: My heart was wavering even as I was fighting alongside them.

Kyu: "Should I really go back to normal?"

Kyu: "Wouldn't I be happier living as a man?"

Kyu: Almost like those selfish feelings of mine were apparent...

AD: If you truly desire it,

AD: I can change this world for you.

Jyu: ...the archbishop left behind the world that was most convenient for me.

G: P-Point and match!

Jyu: That was too tame.

Jyu: How can you call yourself a Yagyu-style,

Jyu: no, a man?!

Jyu: Come at me all at once! Try taking a point off of Yagyu Jyubei!

Kos: That coldhearted swordsmanship...

Kos: Kyubei seems like an entirely different person.

Tou: Uh, Koshinori-sama, the young master really has become a different person.

Bim: That speed...

Bim: It's like she's swinging two swords.

Tou: Uh, Binbokusai-sama, there really is an extra sword swinging from her crotch now.

Kos: I don't really understand, but it looks like Kyubei's

Kos: grasped the secrets of the Yagyu style at long last, Papa.

Bin: Indeed. The Yagyu style's future is secure now.

Tou: Uh, there'll never be any security as long as the two of you are around.

Jyu: The wheels of the world continued to turn as though nothing had ever happened.

G: Get a load of that hunk!

Jyu: Actually, they were turning much smoother than before.

G: Hey, mister.

G: Would you like to hang out with us?

Jyu: S-Sorry. I have plans.

Tae: Jyubei-san!

Tae: Sorry I'm late.

Tae: Did you wait long?

Jyu: Nah, I just got here.

Tae: Oh, that's a relief.

G: Aw, he has a girlfriend?

G: A couple with a hot guy and hot girl is just unfair.

Jyu: Sorry! They misunderstood because of me.

Tae: No, it's fine.

Jyu: Yeah, much smoother than when I was a woman.

Jyu: Shinpachi-kun went to train with another dojo?

Tae: Yeah.

Tae: He said it was high time he got serious about trying to revive our own dojo,

Tae: so he wanted to build up some strength before that.

Jyu: Oh, Shinpachi-kun said that?

Tae: Indeed.

Tae: Before, his attention was divided among Odd Jobs and the dojo,

Tae: but now he's focusing on being an instructor,

Tae: and he really looks the part while teaching.

Tae: I'm sure he wanted to be part of the Odd Jobs trio for longer,

Tae: but after what happened to Ginko-san, Kagura-chan and Sekitobaharu left, too.

Kag: I serve only Cao Cao.

Kag: If we are fated to meet again, then we shall.

Kag: Fare thee well!

Jyu: I see. Ginko-san hasn't returned yet?

Jyu: So Odd Jobs has disappeared from Edo.

Tae: Sheesh. Where in the world has she run off to?

Tae: Who goes on a soul-searching trip at that age?

Kon: Sorry to keep you waiting, Otae.

Tae: Goriko!

Kon: Sorry, work was so hectic, I had some trouble getting away.

Tae: Was it okay to leave?

Kon: Yeah, don't worry about it.

Kon: Even the police need to take breaks every now and then.

Tae: I see.

Tae: I'm glad to hear work's going well, Goriko.

Kon: Look who's talking.

Kon: You've got it much better.

Kon: Though, I never expected us to be suited to that line of work.

Hij: Hey, guys!

Hij: You'd better stop by or you'll be placed under arrest.

G: You're the ones who need to be arrested!

G: Miniskirt police, my foot. You're miniskirt pork, if anything.

Hij: Want me to show you how a real cop does things?

Hij: I could destroy the reputation of scum like you without breaking a sweat!

G: Why is that the only part of the act that seems convincing?

G: Calm down, Tenko!

G: You've got a customer!

Zen: Looks like we've got a bunch of hard-hitting girls here.

Zen: Not that I mind.

Zen: Tenko-chan's right up my alley.

Kon: Well, it's kinda turned into a fuglies club,

Kon: but Tenko's doing great, and she's got a bunch of regular customers.

Kon: What's more...

G: Oh, it's a courtesan parade!

G: W-Wait...

G: That's Lady Soko from Club Sadist!

G: Soko split off from us and teamed up with the deviant advisor.

Sac: What are you doing, Soko?

Sac: Stomp on me harder!

Oki: Shut up, maggot.

Kon: She's now the number one courtesan in the Kabuki District.

Kon: Yoshiwara's Hinowa-san praised her, saying nobody else could earn so much

Kon: without letting anyone even touch their hand.

Tsu: I was right.

Tsu: Hinowa,

Tsu: there may soon be a courtesan in the Kabuki District who surpasses you.

Hin: As the first step of our expansion into the Kabuki District,

Hin: it's been a great success.

Tsu: It's not just here.

Tsu: The moon will rise every night over every neighborhood in Edo.

Tsu: I, Tsukuo, the new Lord of the Night,

Tsu: shall illuminate nights everywhere with radiance like none other.

Kon: It may not be long before the Lord of the Night takes control of Edo's nightlife.

Jyu: I see.

Jyu: All said and done, everyone's doing all right for themselves.

Jyu: It's all my fault things ended up this way,

Jyu: so I was worried.

Kon: Listen to yourself.

Kon: You're a victim yourself, Jyubei.

Kon: Besides, I personally think it was a great opportunity.

Kon: I'd been living my life without caring about masculinity or femininity,

Kon: but when I took a long, hard look at myself from a gender-swapped perspective,

Kon: I found, uh, a new side of me?

Kon: New possibilities?

Kon: Something of the sort.

Kon: Like, the side of me that's happy about being with Otae as a friend,

Kon: and not a stalker or a lover.

Kon: Stuff like that.

Tae: Goriko...

Tae: Jeez, don't say such embarrassing things!

Kon: Guess you're still making me your punching bag, though.

Kon: At any rate,

Kon: it doesn't matter whether we're men or women.

Kon: We're just gonna live as we please either way.

Kon: So you guys should stop worrying about us,

Kon: and do as you please, too.

Tae: Goriko, what are these?

Poster,Sign: Between {\c&HCB A A&}Man and {\c&H DC &}Woman

Kon: Tickets to the latest hit movie.

Kon: They weren't easy to get my hands on.

Kon: What else could I do?

Kon: Now that I've ended up like this,

Kon: you're the only one left who can make Otae happy.

Kon: But let me just make this crystal clear:

Kon: if you make Otae, my friend, cry,

Kon: I'll arrest you.

Poster,Sign: Between Man and Woman

Jyu: This was the world I wished for.

Jyu: Everything was just as I'd wanted it,

Jyu: and yet I knew that this gloominess was not caused by the weather alone.

Jyu: I knew that the ticket I got wasn't wet because of the rain alone.

FT: Hey, samurai.

FT: Would you like your fortune told?

Jyu: Sorry, but I'm done with fortunes.

Jyu: Try someone else.

FT: You have decided whether to live as a man or as a woman, I take it?

FT: So why the long face?

FT: You don't look like someone about to go on a date.

Jyu: I don't know who you are,

Jyu: but I'm neither a man nor a woman.

Jyu: I sowed the seeds of calamity

Jyu: and got everyone caught up in it.

Jyu: Yet I had accepted that I was simply pretending to give up

Jyu: for the sake of my own desires.

Jyu: Still, everyone's looking out for me, totally unaware of my true colors.

Jyu: Don't make her cry?

Jyu: Weren't you the one crying?

Jyu: I'm neither manly nor womanly,

Jyu: just cowardly scum.

Jyu: That was the answer I got after racking my brain,

Jyu: so there's no need to tell my fortune anymore.

FT: You may not necessarily get the same answer this time.

FT: This may lead you down a path of even more anguish,

FT: but I have another ticket right here.

Poster,FT: Space Travel Ticket Earth => XAMA

FT: Unfortunately, it's not something you can use on a date.

FT: It's a ticket to the planet the Dekobokkoists will target next.

FT: Yagyu Jyubei-san, let me ask you once again.

FT: Will you choose that ticket and live on as a man?

FT: Or will you choose this one and go back to being a woman?

Jyu: Wh-What are you—

Gin: No matter what you choose,

Gin: I'm sure you will continue to waver.

Gin: But what's wrong with that?

Gin: Manly? Womanly?

Gin: Are those random values that others made up

Gin: really what you were striving toward?

Gin: If things were so clear cut,

Gin: then neither men, women,

Gin: you,

Gin: or me

Gin: would be leading such painful lives.

Gin: We're all in the same boat, Jyubei.

Gin: You're not the only one who's lost.

Gin: I don't get all the complicated stuff,

Gin: but I do know it's not like us to take this lying down.

C: Wh-What was that light?

C: What is this?!

C: Men have turned into women and vice versa!

AB: Chrislings...

AB: The race that throws gender roles into chaos.

AB: May you bear the brunt of that sin!

D: Uh, Archbishop,

D: all the men and women on this planet are Chris,

D: so in the end they're still Chris Matsumura...

AB: The satellite might have been destroyed on Earth,

AB: but we won't stop.

AB: With this new w*apon, we shall propagate Lord Dekobokko's

AB: teachings to the ends of the universe.

AB: Quickly, take control of the city while they panic.

AB: What's going on?

AB: Archbishop, a few of the residents are fighting back!

AB: Ridiculous.

AB: In the midst of the gender swapping chaos,

AB: I refuse to believe someone could

AB: calmly analyze the situation and strike back at us in an instant.

Kyu: You'd better believe it.

Kyu: Because it doesn't matter to them whether they're men or women.

Kyu: They don't care about living in a masculine or feminine manner,

Kyu: only in a manner that's true to themselves.

AB: Y-You're...

Kyu: Tae-chan,

Kyu: I'm sorry.

Kyu: I'm no Jyubei.

Kyu: Neither a woman nor a man, I am...

Kyu: I am...

Kyu: Ten minus one is...

Kyu: Yagyu Kyubei!

G: Miss.

G: You seem to be coming here every day.

G: Are you waiting for someone?

G: Oh, no.

G: I was simply taking shelter from the rain.

G: But I'm glad.

G: It seems the rain has let up.

G: Um, I'd like to make an advanced booking.

Poster,Sign: Between {\c&HCB A A&}Man and {\c&H DC &}Woman

Tae: Not for a romantic movie like that...

Tae: ...but one you can have a good laugh at with friends!

Preview,Sign: Preview

Hin: Have you gotten used to temple school, Seita?

Hin: Remember to take your lunch today, too.

Title: All Mothers Pack Too Much Food Into a Lunch Box and Ruin the Shape

Sei: Next Episode: "All Mothers Pack Too Much Food Into a Lunch Box and Ruin the Shape."

Hin: You're gonna be late.

Preview,Sign: Preview

Sign: Off you go!

text r: Following Tsukuyo and Gintoki's history lessons,

text l: Seita begins to attend a temple school.

text l: And will we have a new OP and ED next episode? (Still working on it.)

text r: Will he be able to make a hundred friends?