01x04 - The Legend

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Cars on the Road". Aired: September 8, 2022 - present.
Lightning McQueen and his best friend Mater head east from Radiator Springs on a cross-country road trip to meet up with Mater's sister.
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01x04 - The Legend

Post by bunniefuu »


Okay, Mater.

Campfire's ready.
We are all set.


That's how it is.
A progression of learners and teachers.

Hey there, buddy.
I met some new friends.

I gotta say,
they some really interestin' folk.

Hey, y'all come on over.

But, Mater, I thought this was our time.

We were going to hang out together,
make our own plans, right?

Well, it seems to me
you're fighting that road trip sponte...

Spotanei... Spontaneousish... Ugh!

That "make it up as you go" spirit.

I mean, what's wrong
with meeting some fun new friends?


So, what brings you around to these parts?

What brings you around these parts?

Uh, I'm taking a trip with my friend.

A perfectly innocent trip, with a friend?

What's going on here?

Are you both willing to question

everything you think you know
about the natural world?

Yeah, I'm not following here.

We are researchers, Mr. McQueen.

We straddle the thin veil
between the known and the unknown.

- We hunt cryptids.
- Cryptids?

Creatures on the fringes
of our perception.

Which include your Chupacabras,
your mothmans,

and, most especially, your Bigfoot.

And we demand your oath of loyalty

before we accept you
into our secret order.

Secret order?

What are you talking about?

RANGE ROVER: These woods are a hotbed
for cryptid activity,

specifically Bigfoot.

Would you look at that?

Because I'm just not seeing it.

But what do I know?

Listen, you folks have
a fantastic Bigfoot hunt.

I'll be in dreamland.

- Uh, Buddy, I kinda told them we're in.
- What?

♪ Hitting the highway, a couple of friends ♪

♪ With new adventures 'round every bend ♪

♪ Whether racing fast or getting towed ♪

♪ We're ever together, cars on the road ♪

Scanning sector seven.

Nothing here.
Move on to sector eight.

- RANGE ROVER: Moving out.
- It's under there.

- Sector eight. Who's out there?
- Sector, sector, bravo, delta.

Mater report.

Ain't no Bigfoot critters
this way neither.

RANGE ROVER: Yep, clear under that one.
STATION WAGON: Sector nine!

RANGE ROVER: Moving on!

Oh, jeez.

No Bigfoot in their right mind
would stick around

- through all of this racket.


Bigfoot. Give me a break.




Go away!



Get away!






Why am I...





Oh, no!

- Whoa! What? You're awake?

How much of that did you see?

None. Nothing.
I didn't see anything.

Oh, you're not a monster.

You're a monster truck.

Uh, my name is Ivy,
and I used to be a monster truck.

What do you mean "used to be"?

AUDIENCE: Smash! Smash! Smash!

Oh, gimme a break!
What are you waiting for?

IVY: Back there, they expected one thing from me.


I do miss the performance.
Just not that performance.

Out here, I don't need to be
anything for anybody.


Hey, so how about you cut me down?

Not so fast.

You seem harmless.

So why are you hanging
with those gearsticks out there?

Oh, no, no, no. I have absolutely
nothing to do with any of them. [GASPS]

Gotcha, Bigfoot.

You's hereby declared
a class A paranormal specimen

by the secret order of
the Wayne County Cryptid Busters.

Oh, hey, Lightning.

No, I swear!
I'm only an honorary member.

They let me suit up just for tonight.

Okay, okay.

If I cut you down,

you promise to help me flush
those other gasbags off my mountain.

Yep, yep, yep.
We'll do whatever you say.

What exactly did you have in mind?

Huh. There ain't nothin' down here
but a whole lot of bubkes.

Ah, I'm stumped.

I keep scaring them off
but they just keep coming back.

Maybe it's time to up the stakes.

- What the...

I got this. Nothing to see here!
This will all go right back.



That's it.

I think we need to give our rude
little friends a real scary story.


Ooh, how scary are we talking?


RANGE ROVER: Keep your eyes peeled!

Clearly the Bigfoot has dragged
those poor saps into its secret lair.

Prepare to neutralize the beast!



The lights!
Those sounds!

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Forget Bigfoot.
It's time to recalibrate for aliens!

- Look out!


RANGE ROVER: I can't see!

STATION WAGON: Hey, your tire's in my face!

CAMPER: Get me out of here!


[DISTORTED VOICE] We come from a planet
beyond your perception,

on a mission that you may find unpleasant.

It's a class one gray alien!

- Its eyes!
- Oh, no!

Help me!
Help me!

Oh. Mercy! Mercy!


They're emptying him!

Submit, foolish Earth dwellers.

So that we may drain
the living essence from your husks.


Now, which one of you will be first?

Save yourselves!

STATION WAGON: Out of my way!

RANGE ROVER: Let's get out of here!



- It worked!
- Yeah! That's what I'm talking about!

That's cold.
They didn't even try to save me.


Well, you got your mountain back.

Maybe now you can finally catch a break.

Hey, thanks for all your help.

It was really fun
to put on a performance again.

- Uh, hey.
- BOTH: Huh!

So, uh, [CHUCKLES]
where are you guys headed?

This is great!

I think I've been cooped up
just a little too long!

Ugh! Yup, I'd agree with that.

Well, here's to spontaneity.

What doesn't k*ll you
at least makes a new friend.

You've got that right.


Aye, oh!

Uh-oh. Uh-oh.

Watch this move!

Go! Go! Go! Go!

I'm rolling now!

- Whoo!
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