01x20 - Born to Be Wild

[bunniefuu]

This is me, eliza thornberry.

Part of your average family.

I got a dad, a mom,
and a sister.

There is donnie-- we found him.

And darwin?
He found us.

( Jabbering )

Oh, yeah, about our house--
it moves.

'Cause we travel
all over the world.

You see, my dad hosts
this nature show

And my mom sh**t it.

Okay, so we're not that average.

( Panting )

And between you and me

Something amazing happened...

And now I can talk to animals.

It's really cool

But totally secret.

And you know what?

Life's never been the same.

Nigel:
♪ did you ever hear tell
of sweet betsy from pike ♪

♪ Who crossed the big mountains
with her lover, ike ♪

♪ With two yoke of cattle,
a large yellow dog ♪

♪ A tall shanghai rooster ♪

♪ And one spotted hog. ♪

I like that.

♪ Singing touralai,
touralai, touralai-ay ♪

♪ Singing touralai, touralai,
touralai-ay... ♪

( Rock music playing
through headphones )

( Nigel continues singing )

Care to mosey on over
and touralai with me?

Such fun.

( Turns volume up )

Marianne:
nigel, quick!

Take a look at this.

Goodness, you've brought
back a little girl.

Oh, but it's eliza,
isn't it?

( Giggles )

But look what
she found in town.

Eliza:
a man in the marketplace
gave it to me.

This hair-- marianne,
do you know what this is?

Well, I wasn't sure.

( Choking ):
d... Dad.

Sorry, eliza, sorry.

But that would mean
there was one nearby.

Nigel, this is
your chance.

What? What is it?

It's the hair of
a sumatran rhino.

A hairy rhino?

The sumatran rhino is covered
with thick red hair.

It's almost as if
the last 30 million years

Have passed them by.

That's cool, but why
has it got dad all freaked out?

Your father's never
seen one in the wild.

So are you going
to find it?

If I can.

Nigel, I'm sure you'll find it.

You can track anything.

Except a sumatran rhino.

It alone has evaded me.

I tried once, back when
I was in my prime.

You'll find it, dad.

I know you will.

But I couldn't,
you know

Even when I was
at my best.

It's always been
my dream, eliza.

I'm just worried--
it might be too late

For your old dad.

Marianne...

Would you still love me
if I worked in a shop?

Please, be real, nigel.

You're going to find that rhino,
first thing in the morning.

You're right, marianne.

( Inhales deeply )

I must.

Dad!

Yes, dearest?

I can help you.

Oh, dear, that's sweet.

Help your old dad
with his rhino.

You and your mother,
me and deb.

Or deb could stay here.

Actually, eliza

There is quite a bit
of quicksand out there.

Perhaps it's best that
you stay here as well.

Come on, please.

I'm sure I could help.

I'm sorry, dear.

You know the rule
about quicksand.

( Mocking ):
"you know the rule
about quicksand."

( Snoring )

( Whispering ):
darwin... Darwin, wake up.

Why did you wake me?

I was dreaming
that we spent a whole day

Without going anywhere
or doing anything dangerous.

I'm sorry, dar

But you didn't hear
my dad last night.

Finding a rhino is, like,
the most important thing.

Then let's hope he finds it.

I'm going to make sure
he finds it, darwin

By finding it first.

( Shrieks )

First...

As in right now?

Yep.

( Squeals )

It's a perfect day,
marianne.

I'll just leave a note
for the girls.

Whose turn is it
to watch donnie?

( Sniffing )

What is it?

Rhino.

( Yells )

( Breathing excitedly )

( Panting )

Wait up.

No way am I spending my day
watching donnie.

( Pings )

Pwang!

I'm 16-- I have rights.

( Squeals )

( Jabbers )

( Babbling )

( Sighs ):
forget it.

You are on your own today,
donnie.

( Gasps )

Donnie! Donnie!

( Donnie jabbering in distance )

( Squeals )

( Thud )

Wow! Look at this, darwin.

It's... It's like a road.

Darwin:
kind of creepy,
don't you think?

Come on, darwin.

Something just came
through here

And knocked all
this stuff over

And it looks
like it was huge.

Oh, now I feel better.

Darwin, look!

It's rhino hair.

He went this way.

Wait!

Don't go
down there.

Why not?

That's where
the rhino lives.

The rhino?

Come on, darwin.

You don't
understand.

The rhino...
The vicious deer-eating rhino...

He just likes
to be left alone.

He eats deer
and monkeys.

There's no such thing
as a deer-eating rhino.

Thank you.

The truth is, no one
knows what he eats

Or anything about him.

He doesn't talk
to the other animals.

Of course not.

He eats them!

We'll be
careful, okay?

Come on, darwin-- let's go.

Thanks for
your help.

( Babbling )

Ooh.

( Singing gibberish )

Donnie.

( Screeches )

There you are.

Could you maybe just once
not cause me grief?

( Gasps )

It's okay, donnie.

Just stay behind me.

( Babbles )

Donnie.

( Groans )

( Gasps )

Nice trunks.

Mind you don't go too
aggro with the board--

Might hurt yourself.

Who... Who are you?

Sorry, love--
name's brian.

And you are?

I'm... Debbie.

And those are my mates.

We're going to catch us
some morning glass.

Care to join us?

( Whispers ):
thank you.

That was so weird.

Why would those deer be
so afraid of a rhino?

Maybe it does eat deer,
and monkeys.

Darwin, there's nothing
to be afraid of.

You know that.

I mean, you saw rhinos
in africa.

( Stampeding animal
approaching )

( Screams )

But they didn't
look like that?

( Both scream )

Run!

He's gaining on us.

Quick, darwin,
the tree!

( Screams, then thud )

( Rhino growling, stampeding )

Eliza...

Eliza!

( Groans )

( Squeals )

Are you all right?

( Both scream )

If you want to eat eliza

You're going to have
to go through me!

Darwin...
You scared him.

( Doubtfully ):
I did?

( Confidently ):
you bet I did.

Wait-- there he is.

Dad is going
to be psyched.

Hey, rhino, don't be
scared of darwin.

Come on out here,
I want to talk to you.

I just wanted to see
if you were okay.

Yeah, I'm okay.

Can you come out
and talk to me?

I don't want to.

I think he's shy.

Look, I'm sorry
we bothered you

But I just want
to talk to you.

Why?

'Cause... Well, 'cause
you and me are a lot alike.

See, look-- I have
hair just like you.

Did you make
all these tunnels?

I guess.

Oh, I'd like
to see them.

Would you show us
around?

How'd you do?

You're a natural,
you are.

Thanks, sheila.

Hey, wait!

Who's sheila?

You are, sheila.

That's what
we call girls.

And make us a sandwich,
would you, sheila?!

What is this, 1950?

What do you want me
to do with this?

( Babbles )... Wax rub...

Sheila.

Why'd you
do that?

I don't know.

Just seemed like a good idea.

You know,
you're really nice.

It's just so weird that
those deer think you're...

Well, I mean, it's like
they've never talked to you.

Oh, I guess I mostly stayed
in that tunnel

Where I chased you.

That one's just for me.

Don't you ever talk
to the other animals?

Um... No.

You should.

Then they'd know
how nice you were.

Uh... Do you want
to see the spring?

I'll show you the spring, okay?

This is so cool!

( Sniffing )

( Exasperated groan )

You're having trouble
finding this rhino,
aren't you?

I'm afraid I'm a bit
out of my league.

Past my prime
and all that.

But not to worry--

We'll just go back home
and I'll sell...

I don't know... Hats.

Nigel, remember last
christmas at my mother's

When her schnauzer
wandered away?

Yes, bunny muffin.

And you remember
who found him?

Turned out he was
under the sink.

Well, yes, he was

But in the hour
before he started whining

How many stray dogs
did you find?

I don't know-- 15, 20?

Could a shoe salesman do that?

Um, it's hats, dearest.

Then do you think a hat salesman
could have found

Those 20 lost dogs?

No.

But I did, didn't i?

Yes, you did.

And now I'm going
to find a rhino.

( Chortles )

Darling, quickly,
( sniffs air )
I'm on the scent.

Wow.

Look-- all the
other animals

Use the tunnels to get
to the watering hole.

Is there something wrong?

Uh, no, it's
just it's kind of
crowded out there.

I have to go.

( Rhino's feet thumping )

Wait!

( Panting )

I wanted to ask you

One little,
itty-bitty favor.

Eliza,
am I wrong

Or are we
sinking?

We are sinking!

Oh, then that would make this...

All:
quicksand!

( All struggling )

( Calmly ):
don't panic.

It'll make you sink faster.

Just let me think.

( Panicking )

You're panicking, darwin.

I'm afraid I'm panicking, too.

We all need to pull
ourselves together.

I'm sure there's
a way out of this.

Come on, come on.

Reach...

You can do it.

( Groaning )

( Whimpering )

I saw my whole life
flashing before my eyes.

( Grunting )

Eliza:
you can grab it.

Use your teeth.

Now what?

Swim!

I don't know how!

Then run!

( Panting )

Come on,
you can do it,
you can do it.

Come on, come on,
run, run!

Come on,
you can do it.

( All groaning and panting )

You saved my life.

I'm glad you're
all right.

You said you wanted
to ask me a favor.

Eliza wants you
to meet her dad.

More people?

It's just my dad.

Oh, yes, and your mum.

Well, yeah, just them.

They're here
to put you on tv.

Which means that
millions of people

Will know you're here.

Will they come bother me?

They might-- you want to be
left alone, don't you?

My dad wants to see
you so much...

But I can't do it.

You have to go.

Go on, get out of here!

Nigel:
marianne, the trail
leads this way.

Marianne:
right behind you.

Help me.

Nigel:
marianne,
this is interesting.

You see the size
of this rhino's foot?

Marianne:
nigel, you found it!

Nigel:
and the indentation's
so fascinating.

Eliza:
a little farther.

And now turn.

I don't get this.

It'll confuse my dad.

He'll think you went that way.

( Screeching )

( Out of breath ):
this'll confuse them.

( Gasping ):
I feel sick.

Heavens.

Unless I'm wrong

The rhino seems to
have stopped to do...

( Chuckles )
some sort of dance
with a chimpanzee.

Rather strange--

Dancing with a chimp
in sumatra of all places.

If didn't know better,
I'd swear

That the rhino was trying
to throw me off the trail.

That is odd.

It's smashing!

He knows we're out here
and he's trying to hide.

Well, nigel thornberry is
up to the challenge.

We went this way.

He's good.

Too good.

He's not giving
up, is he?

Neither are we--
let's double back.

Maybe that'll throw him
off the trail.

I'm whacked.

Then let me use
your board.

Well, this stuff's

Pretty demanding,
sheila.

Whatever-- you think
you're so cool?

Well, guess what?

You are going to have to use
more catalyst

If you want that resin
to set up.

You know fiberglass?

Yeah.

I learned it from my mom.

I could fix a ding like that
in a minute.

( Groans )

Thanks, sheila.

( Sighs ):
this is so random.

Come on, donnie, let's go.

Donnie?

( Donnie babbling )

Donnie!

( Laughing )

Give me that, ugh!

You can't go
out there.

You're supposed to
be patching my board.

Debbie:
patch your
own board

And get a life.

And don't call me "sheila."

Later, kooks.

( Donnie babbling )

( Straining )

Whee!

Wha-hoo!

( Jabbering wildly )

( Yelling )

Eliza, we're back
in camp.

Don't worry about it.

Just keep moving.

Nigel:
marianne, this way.

These tracks
are fresh.

Your dad is good at this.

Oh! Yes, he is.

We'll never
get away from him.

We've got
to hide you, quick!

In here.

( Straining )

( Groaning )

Darwin!

The footprints!

( Grunting )

Nigel:
yes, darling,
I can feel it.

I must
thank you, dear.

If it wasn't for you

I'd still be
sitting out there

Feeling sorry
for myself

Instead of standing
here... At camp?

He couldn't have led us to camp.

( Metal creaks )

Oh, nigel, I'm sorry.

Who am I kidding?

My tracking days
are over.

( Straining )

( Grunting
and groaning )

Mom, dad!, Oh, hi!

Everything all right?

Oh, yes, darling.

Lots of people
want to buy hats

From a doddering
old explorer.

( Metal creaking )

What?

It seems I've lost
my touch, eliza.

It's just that rhinos...

( Metal groaning )

Well, maybe they don't
want to be found.

No, when one begins to slip,
that's it.

All part of growing old,
I suppose.

No matter.

I could call
the store

"Nigel thornberry's hat world."

( Voice quavering ):
wouldn't that be smashing?

Dad, it's not that bad.

I should say not.

If I was an inuit, you'd have
to pop me onto a block of ice

And send me out to sea.

No, there's still
a world to explore.

It's just... It's a world
of hats, you see.

Now... Why the long faces?

It's not so bad.

Here-- watch.

Hello, sir.

I'll bet you'd fancy
a nice, um... Hat.

You see.

( Metal creaking )

I'll flourish!

( All gasp )

( Giggles nervously )

Oh, look at him, marianne.

The sumatran
rhino.

He's...

He's beautiful.

But dad, listen,
this rhino...

Must be our
little secret.

Secret?

Oh, heavens, yes.

I'm sorry, eliza.

I suppose you're keen

To have him on
the television show

But it wouldn't
really do at all.

Now, what we must do

Is get him back
to where he's
safe and happy.

But... What about your dream?

I got to see my rhino.

And I got
to track him, too.

Well, that's rather plenty,
don't you think?

Dad...

Sometimes you are
really cool.

Oh, well... I wouldn't
go that far.

( Crowd approaching )

Oh?

What is that?

Goodness-- people.

That's the last thing
this poor rhino needs.

Eliza, you take the rhino
back into the jungle

Whilst your mother
and I distract

Whoever's coming this way.

( Groaning )

Come on!

Crowd ( chanting ):
debbie! Debbie! Debbie!

( Chanting stops )

Thank you, boys, that'll be all.

That'll
be all.

( Chanting resumes )

Debbie, what have you
been up to?

Living a dream, mom,
living a dream.

Good show, debbie.

I say, this calls
for celebration

And some music.

♪ Did you ever hear tell
of sweet betsy from pike? ♪

Everybody!

♪ Who crossed the big mountains
with her lover, ike... ♪

Am I really going
to have to meet
a million people?

Nope.

Really?

Really.

( Singing continues )

Do you want
to go now?

Well, not right away.

I kind of like this.

Nigel:
♪ singing touralai,
touralai, touralai-ay ♪

♪ Singing touralai, touralai,
touralai-ay. ♪

( Laughing ):
it's a jolly song.