02x21 - Have Yourself a Thornberry Little Christmas

Episode transcripts for the TV show "The Wild Thornberrys". Aired: September 1, 1998 - June 11, 2004.
Eliza travels the world with her unusual family, as her parents make wildlife films.
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02x21 - Have Yourself a Thornberry Little Christmas

Post by bunniefuu »

This is me--
eliza thornberry

Part of your average family.

I got a dad, a mom...

And a sister.

There is donnie--
we found him.

And darwin-- he found us.

Oh, yeah, about our house--
it moves

'Cause we travel
all over the world.

You see, my dad hosts
his nature show

And my mom sh**t it.

Okay, so we're not
that average.

And between you and me,
something amazing happened.

And now I can talk to animals.

It's really cool...

But totally secret.

And you know what?

Life's never been the same.

[Captioning sponsored by the
u.s. Department of education

And nickelodeon]

( Laughing and shouting )

oh, go easy, girls.

Your grandmumsy

Wouldn't want us

To break whatever

Christmas presents are inside.


Come on, tell me you got me
that home tattoo kit.

I thought you were supposed
to open all your presents

Tomorrow on christmas.

We always open grandmumsy's
box the day before.

You have got
to be kidding.

Dolls. She sent us dolls.

I haven't played with a doll
since I was a kid.

I guess grandmumsy
didn't get your christmas list.

The earrings
are sort of rad.

( Squawks )


( Donnie jabbering )

I see something

For donnie.

( Blows raspberry )

I guess clothes
weren't on your list.

a christmas goose.

And hard sauce, stuffing
and plum pudding.

Plum pudding? Awesome.

She even sent her own recipe
for the goose.

Oh, a traditional english
christmas dinner.

Just like when
I was a boy.

Well, let's start

Nigel, where did
you put the decorations?

They're in this
storage bin right here.

Wait. They're not in there.

That's right.

I saw them
in the compartment

On the other side
of the commvee.

Deb, we've
got to find

Somewhere to wrap this camera
warmer we got for mom and dad.

Well, we can't do it here
with them looking all over

For the decorations.

Are you sure they're
going to even like
that doohickey?

Remember when they lost
their last one?

Dad cried on my shoulder
so much

My favorite shirt
went towel city.


This is the perfect gift.

After what we spent on it,
it better be.

I'll hide it inside.

Mom, daddy, we found
the decorations.

Sneaky devils.

Hiding where I
thought they were

To begin with.

All the soap my mother
ever sent me.

Are these the cards
your mumsy sent us
over the years?

Oh, I do miss my mumsy.

Oh, let's put them all up.

Hey, I think I found

This year's

Christmas tree.

It'll be easier to decorate
than last year's cactus.

( Grunting )

( Jabbering )

a culinary prodigy.

I can use a man of your talents
in the kitchen with me, donnie.

Come along.

Off to begin
my cooking adventure.

Let's go down to the coast

And find some seashells
for the tree.

And maybe a starfish
for the top.

It's hard to walk.

Well, you wanted to wear
donnie's knickers.

I thought
they'd be warm.

Ah, not bad.

Female voice:
help! Help! My babies!

What's the matter?

I can't get my eggs warm
enough by sitting on them.

If it stays cold...

gosh, they
won't hatch.

We've got to do something.


Oh, please, my babies
won't last long!

They're going to be fine.

( Softly ):
please be fine.

There, that should do it.

( Yelling )


Darwin, stay here and help
the ostrich sit on her eggs.

You must be joking.

Please! Please, help!

Two bodies are warmer than one.

Oh, all right.

I'd better not
hear any of you
laughing in there.

( Marianne humming
"deck the halls" )

now, donnie

The recipe calls
for a dash of salt

But I think a pinch

Would be
the right choice.

Of course, we could always
use a smidgen.

mom, you're not
going to believe

What eliza and I
got you this year.

You and dad are
going to flip.


( Gasps )

Capital suggestion.

Dash it is.

( Groaning )

Well, it's coming along.

Making progress, honey?


More like making
holes in my fingers!

( Sneezing )

Careful... Careful
with those eggs.

This isn't easy.
Do you know what it's like

To sit for a long time
on a pile of unhatched eggs?

Wait, I guess you do.

Your parents'

It's the only thing
that might work.


Just like an incubator.

( Gasps )

Did you see that?

It moved.

Oh, thank you,
thank you, thank you.

That should do the trick.

How long do you think
it will be

Before the eggs hatch?

By the end of the day.

I hope.

Mom and dad might still get
their camera warmer.

We'll come back here later
and see how it's going.

Oh, I think I have
egg leg. Oh...

( Birds chirping )

( Debbie groans )

You flying feathered freaks!

I hope that popcorn goes

Straight to your

Hey, listen, mom and
dad are both busy.

Now's the perfect time
to wrap that...

Oh, right.

( Nervous chuckle )

The present.


What's wrong?

Where is it?

It's just...

I took it out to the shore.

You... You what?!

Why would you do

A dorky thing like that?

To wrap it. I couldn't let
mom and dad see me

Wrapping it in camp.

So where is it now?

Uh... I-i lost it.

It must have fallen
out of my pack.

You... You lost it?!

Can't you do anything right?

I will go find it.

Um, where did you lose it,

I lost it somewhere
over there...

In the desert.

( Sighs )

What now?

We go back to the nest

And hope
those eggs have hatched.

Oh, I wonder
if they'll look like me?

( Whinnying )

Did you hear that?

That doesn't sound good.

But that's never
stopped us before.

( Grunting )

( Hooves pounding )

( Whinnying )

( Snarling )

Go on, get away.

oh, look, a zebra
playing with jackals.

Looks like fun.

Okay, let's go.

Darwin, that
zebra's cornered.

( Whimpering )

Hey, stop.

They're gone. Hey!

Those jackals cut me off
from my herd.

I've got to get back to it.

What if those jackals come back
before you find them?

I used to be able
to outrun everything.

I just want to see
my family again.

Maybe we can help you
get to your herd.

How? You can't make me faster.

Maybe not, but...

There. With you
all lit up like this

The jackals
won't bother you.

( Gasps )

Oh, darn it.

( Jackals howling )

Well, you tried.

Don't give up.

We've got flashlights
back at the commvee.

Follow me.

Lord nelson's underknickers.

How spectacular.

There's nothing left
but to let the goose cook

In its savory juices.

Then this is a great time
to get some film

Of the elephants that live
in this area.

Mm-hmm, my thoughts exactly.

I already prepared a note
for the girls.

Wow. This place looks great.

Anyone home?

We lucked out.

I'll grab the flashlights.

They're gone.

Now what?

( Jackals howling )

That should do it.

( Growling )

( Screams )

I'll hold them off.
You run for it.

If you see my herd

Tell them how hard I tried
to get back to them.

Let's try this first.

( Whimpering )

It worked!

They're gone.

Uh, thanks
for your help.

You're welcome.

Boy, when the herd
sees me like this

They'll laugh their stripes off.

look, they're giving
the calf a bath.

It doesn't seem
so long ago

That we did that
for eliza and debbie.

Without using our trunks,
of course.

( Trumpeting )

( Others trumpeting )

they seem to have
spotted something.


Ow! Ouch! Oh!

Stupid sand.


( Groaning )

( Both gasping )

( Donnie babbling )

Debbie, what are you
doing out here?

I was looking for your ca...

Elephants to, to help you.



Let's head back, shall we?

My goose is cooked.

( Goofy laughter )

So is yours, eliza!

It's just not the same.

I know, but I've got
to do something.

Mom worked so hard.

They can't come back
and see the decorations are...

Oh, no.

My decorations--
they're gone.

So are mumsy's cards.

Something else
is still missing, too.

Eliza, what

Uh, sand grouse?



A whole flock of them.

They got scared by a jackal

And they flew over the commvee
and they got tangled

And before I could help them

They all flew off
carrying the lights.

Oh, no.

Never fear.

Grouse can't fly very far
weighted down.

If we split up and search,
we'll have the lights by dinner.

( Choking )

( Growling )

Oh, come on, eliza,
cheer up.

It's christmas.


( Roaring )

Oh, no!

( Growling )

( Shrieking )

Boy, do you
smell delicious.

Eliza, help!


You don't want him.

Yes, I do.

I'm starving!

B-b-but he's all gristly.

Hey! I'm all muscle.

Thank you very much.

You're right.

He wouldn't
fill me up at all.

But if I eat him and you...

( Chuckles )

Don't go far.

( Whimpering in fear )

( Growling )

( Shrieking )


( Panting )

Hang on, darwin!

( Whimpering in fear )

( Growling )

( Screaming )

( Sniffing )


Thank goodness.

( Gnawing )

Not as fresh as I like,
but not bad.

( Roaring ):
I want more!

( Screaming )

Not again.

Oh, I can't give away

( Roaring )

( Gasps )


( Panting )

I guess i...

Showed him, huh?

Tell him I'm too hairy
for dessert.

( Loud burp )

I'm sorry I chased you.

I was just so hungry.



You're welcome.

( Yawning )

Now, I'm ready
for a nice long nap.

Dad's goose,
the mashed potatoes

The gravy, the rolls,
the pie.

Oh, did you have
to give him the pie?

( Gasps )

( Both gasp )

I suppose they flew further
than we thought.

Mumsy's cards could be
in kenya by now.

And no lights...

What happened?!

( Gasps )

( Jabbering )

At least we have our goose.

( Nigel screaming )



My bird has been goose-napped.

Marianne, call
the local constables.

Nigel, you worked so hard.

How could everything
have just disappeared?

Well, an animal
must have gotten
in there somehow.

( Sighs in disgust ):
oh, man.

Mom, dad, debbie...

I ruined christmas.

I gave the lights to a zebra
to protect it from jackals.

I also gave away the camera
warmer we got for mom and dad.

You what?!

You got us a camera warmer?

I gave it to an ostrich
so its eggs could hatch.

I managed to get torqued up
about this stupid holiday

And you mess it up
for all of us!

I didn't mean to.

I was just trying to help.

( Eliza sobbing )

And I gave the food to a lion.

He was going to eat darwin.

You were chased
by a lion?

Well, why didn't
you tell us?

I didn't want you to be mad.


The food, the lights, the gift--
that's all replaceable

But we can never
get another eliza.

Besides, honey,
you did the right thing.

You saved darwin.

You helped animals.

We could never be mad
about that.

But this christmas
was going to be so great.

Oh, don't
worry, honey.

It'll be a different
kind of christmas

But it'll be christmas

We'll have to find
something else to eat.

Well, let's see what we have.

They didn't seem mad.

Why are you still upset?

I wish I could
make this up to everyone.

Wait, maybe I can.

( Jabbering )

Sometimes, he makes
about as much sense as you do.

( Jabbering )

Mom, dad

Since eliza lost
our present for you

I wrote you a christmas poem.

( Clears throat )

The holidays are joyous,
not filled with woe

Even for our family,
always on the go

But this year bites the big one,
like you don't know

Because eliza ruined christmas,
ho, ho, ho.

Oh, you don't have to say it.

I'm gifted.

Mom, dad


Follow me, quick!

( Chomping )

Okay, everybody's ready.

Good. Here
they come.

Eliza, what's the matter?

( All gasp )


But, eliza,
how did you...

( Chattering )

( Squawking in rhythm )

( Braying in rhythm )

( Cheeping in rhythm )

( Growling in rhythm )

( Roaring )

You know, if I didn't
know any better

I'd swear that sounds
like "jingle bells."

( Trumpeting )

Nothing like
a thornberry

Is there?

All of us

Surrounded by animals,

Thank you.

Merry christmas!

Oh, merry christmas.

Oh, yes.

Merry christmas, eliza.

Debbie, merry christmas.

( Animals calling
and trumpeting )


( Donnie jabbering )

( Elephants trumpeting )

( Donnie jabbering )

Oh, I think I have
egg leg. Oh...
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