01x03 - Prisoners of Love

Episode transcripts for the show, "Adventure Time". Aired: April 5, 2010 - September 3, 2018.*
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Twelve- year-old Finn battles evil in the Land of Ooo.
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01x03 - Prisoners of Love

Post by bunniefuu »

♪ Adventure Time ♪

♪ C'mon grab your friends ♪

♪ We'll go to very ♪

♪ distant lands ♪

♪ With Jake the dog ♪

♪ and Finn the human ♪

♪ The fun will never end ♪

♪ It's Adventure Time! ♪

Oh no!

Our sled's broken!

Hey, let's build one out of snow!

What are you doing, Jake?

Sleds are for suckers.

Just ride on my gut.

Okay!

Switch!

Switch back! Switch back!

Penguins!

I'm a flying dog!

Ahah! Mathematical!

What?!

Who dares enter the Ice Kingdom?!

Aww, Ice King's here.

You know why I'm here?

Do you know what "Ice King" means?!

Yeah, I know what "Ice King" means...

A big nerd!

Oh ho oh! Holy cow!

It means I'm King of Ice!

This is my domain!

And you are violating Ice World law...

...trespassing!

Come on, brother!
We're just trying to b*at the heat.

Yeah! There's a big sleeping
lava man in our front yard,

and he is so hot!

Wait, wait, no, I take it back.

I don't mean, like, "sexy" hot.

No, no, you do mean "sexy" hot.

No, I mean...

I don't care!

This is my kingdom.

You guys can't just scoot about on my
land willy-nilly.

I've got rules here.

Why don't you just try being cool?

What?!

I am the king!

I am the king of c-cool c-co ca...

That's it!

Rise monsters of snow

and go b*at up Finn and Jake!

Huh yeah!

Oh man, that was great!

Ooh, you guys are gonna get it.

Yeah, right, sure.

I need a magic back.

Trail mix.

Ooh, yogurt chip.

Aww man.

I'm back home!

Hello, ladies!

Now, now. I've brought you a baby...

...and a puppy.!

Finn! Are you okay?

Huh, Wildberry Princess?

Hot Dog Princess?

W-what's goin' on?

We're all prisoners, Finn.

Ice King!

What?

Why are you keeping these
girls prisoners, jerk?

You don't understand!

I collect princesses because
I want to marry one.

Well, why'd you capture six of them
if you just want to marry one?

I'm collecting them all first to
be sure I make the right choice.

You're both too young to understand,

but marriage is a serious thing
and lasts forever.

You can't just rush into it, you know?

Ice King, don't do this.

Just let the girls go.

They don't want to be here.

Of course they do!

I would have k*lled them already
if they didn't want to be here.

Right ladies?

Don't worry, princesses.

I pledge that Jake and I will protect
each and everyone of you

and furthermore...

I see all of you happily married to whatever
sweet thing y'all want to be married to!

Rad! All I need is something
to spear the Ice King with.

Binoculars...

Toothbrush...

Water bottle...

Quilt...

Sweater...

Trail mix...

My flute!

My flute!

Aw, nuts, dude!

You broke it when we tried picking
the lock to that sad ogre's heart!

Darn it!

Nice try, boy!

Princesses, did you see?

Did you see Finn fail?

Don't worry, Finn.

I'll get us out of here with...

...Key Hand!

Oh, no you won't!

Jake!

Eat it.

I...

...I'm okay.

Ice King!

You better either set us free

or come in here and fight me

'cause otherwise...

...I'm gonna flip out!!!

Oh, are you trying to hit me?

Well, excuse me because
I have to go potty in the bathroom.

ICE KING!!!

Finn!

Huh?

Jake, you alright?

I'm fine, buddy.

Calm down and tend to the princesses.

Oh my gosh.

I'm sorry, princesses.

Slime Princess, are you alright?

He's held us here for weeks,

questioning us about our favorite
sports and quirky behavior.

I've tried to tell him
as little as possible.

I understand.

And, Lumpy Space Princess,
how to you fair?

I'm bored, and I'm not having any fun.

What? Not having any fun?

But last night I read you the story of

"Baby Whatsit and the Bottle Prince."

That wasn't fun. That was lame.

Other princesses,
do you feel the same way?

Well, here, watch. I'll show you.

We'll have some fun.

Fun's my middle name.

Here, now, Wildberry Princess.

I need you to play this.

I don't know how.

Well, come here, I'll teach you.

Put your hand through the bars...

Atta princess, and uh...

I don't think I can.

Just play it like I showed you.

Leave her alone, Ice King!

PLAY IT OR I'LL SQUISH YOU INTO JUICE!!!

Oh dear!

Yeah, keep playing it.

Now everyone pick up an instrument
and play it.

Oh, this is going to be so much fun!

What are you thinking, Finn?

I've almost devised a plan.

I'm gonna let him drum till' I've
finalized the details in my mind.

Sweet!

Oh, that was fun!

Ah! It was fun!

Hey, you should get some more fun stuff.

You're right! Good idea, Finn.

"Good idea," indeed.

I hope they think I'm fun.

Alright. I've got a plan on
how to get out of here.

First everyone needs to be dancing
and laughing and saying fun stuff like

“Whoopee!”

Okay, when the Ice King comes back,

everyone play it up, like we want him
to come inside the jail and party with us

and when he steps inside...

I'm gonna b*at the tar out
of him with these

...while you all take care of Jake.

Everyone on board with this?

Sweet! Nice plan, dude!

I think by everyone saying "Whoopee"
the plan won't work

cause he'll know we're faking it.

Good point, LSP.

I'm gonna say something fun like

"Oh yeah, I'm having a fun time!

Oh my gosh, havin' the best time
I've ever had in my entire life!"

Make way for the fun tray!

Whoa, what's happening?

...probably the best time I've ever
had in my whole life...

..so much fun!

What is this?

We're having fun!

Whoopee!

Because I left the room?

Because they like it here.

Because they like you.

Because you're a really fun guy!

I don't get this.

He's not buying it. Dance harder.

Come on in here and party.

Wanna dance with us, Ice King?

Come on!

Really? You want to dance with me?

Oh yeah! Whoo! Woohoo!

Wow...

Yes! Yes! Whoopee!

Wait, no!

Don't leave!

I'll k*ll you all!

Why are you doing this?

Everyone was finally warming up to me.

No! That is not the case!

You're nuts, man!

And I don't know how to help you!

Probably because I'm just a simple dude.

So maybe you should talk to someone
with more life experience...

...like Jake!

Whoa, whoa, whoa, Finn,
what are you doing?

Don't dump the Ice King on me!

But you gotta get it in you're head, man!

Putting princesses in jail is wrong!

Finn, you just ruined my chances
with 5 or 6 potential wives!

For that you will...

Oh, my beard.

Why do people not like me?

Is it because I'm a magic user?

Or is my beard too shaggy?

I try so hard to be a
good husband for girls.

What's wrong with me?

Hoo.

You're a sociopath.

Who are you?

I know...

You're probably a...

...a big nerd!

Why don't you try being cool like me?

Star dust is so ticklish!

What happened?

Princesses?

Thank you for saving us, Finn.

You're welcome, Slime Princess!

And remember when you vowed to
marry us to the thing of our choosing?

Yeah...

Well...

I'd like to marry you.

Oh, heh heh, well how 'bout that...

Jake, help me!

Slime Princess, you shouldn't marry Finn.

He pees his pants constantly.

All the time.

Oh, gross!

Put me down!

Put me down!!!

I-I'm sorry.

Jake!
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