02x15 - Visitors from Outer Space/The Case of the Missing Rugrat

[bunniefuu]

[ Snoring]

[ Gasps]

[ Kids laughing]

Blub, blub.

Hey, kid, I'm a fish.

[ Giggles]

Blub.

I'm the
coolest fish

This side of the
mississippi river.

Didi, it's time
to prepare.

For what, pop?

Aliens.

Didi:
"soap queen
weds goatman"?

Pop:
no, the other
page.

That there's
a family

Just like ours.

Aliens sucked them up
with a laser

And kept them prisoner
for million years.

Which is seconds
in earth time.

Oh, come on, pop.

I didn't believe it,
either

But these are
eyewitnesses.

Those aliens
got weapons

To blow up planets.

[ Gasps]

While you debate this,
I'll put this guy to bed.

Didi:
but pop...

[ Giggling]

Night-night, champ.

[ Giggling]

Didi:
"dolphin
grows arms"?

Pop:
them aliens
are planning

A full-scale
invasion.

If we don't prepare,
they'll take over.

Didi:
"scientists plot
to blow up moon?"

Pop:
they're invading
and they'll start

By taking us right
out of our bedrooms.

[ Crickets chirping]

[ Gasps]

Ah...

Oooh...

Oh!

[ Whirring]

[ Gasps]

Wow.

[ Beeping]

Greetings, earthling.

Stuvon, you know
humans can't talk.

They're inferior
beings.

Stuvon:
I forgot.

You aliens
are always forgetting.

Not the robot.

Don't be so sure
earthlings are dumb.

One of these days

They might surprise you.

I thought
he'd turn in

To recharge
his batteries.

My batteries don't need
a goldarn recharge.

Been running fine
for million years.

Or was it ?

This earthling goes
in the holding chamber

With the others?

If you don't mind.

Well, I domind

But I will, seeing
as I'm the robot.

[ Gasps]

Too bad you humans can't talk.

Guess that's because
you're inferior beings.

If you ask me,
you earthlings are

At least as smart
as those aliens.

[ Barking]

Get off of me!

Shoo, shoo.

Get out of here, darn hover-pup.

Can't travel the galaxy
without a pet, they say.

But who do you suppose
has to clean up after it?

There, maybe you earthlings

Can engage in some primitive
form of communication.

What are you guys
doing here?

I don't know,
tommy.

One minute I'm lying
in my crib

Minding my own business

Then the next thing I know
I'm in this weird playpen.

How's a baby supposed
to get any sleep?

Who are those
funny-looking grown-ups?

You guys, I think
they're aliums.

Both:
aliums?

My grandpa says
they're taking
over our blanket.

No! Anything but that!

Aw, quit your
bellyaching.

We got to escape.

[ Whirring]

Here it is, didor,
my latest invention.

I hope it's better
than the zodiac shuffler.

So the moon's not in the
seventh house anymore.

Big deal.

Who will notice
except a couple hippies?

Okay, stuvon,
let's see it.

Okay, the first official
demonstration

Of the stuvon

The easiest way
to blow up planets.

See that asteroid?

Point the stuvon at it,
press this button...

[ Whirring]

[ Boom]

No more planet.

Cool.

Don't you think
it's a bit dangerous?

Heck, no, as long as you
aim at the right planet.

You can even
knock out walls

When redecorating.

Well...

Oh, mr. Alium, sir...

Holy voltar, it talked.

Impossible--
our explorations show

Earthlings lack the intelligence
to communicate.

Your experiments

Don't work so well,
do they?

I told you they're
smarter than you think.

I'll try to establish
communication.

Hello, little earthling.

What's your name?

My name's angelica.

May I play with your tv changer?

I think the
earthling means

Your planet
atomizer.

Oh-- I'm sorry, earthling

But the stuvon
is far too dangerous

For a being of inferior
intelligence.

I said give it!

Yow!

Get her before she obliterates
the solar system!

Angelica's sure in
a lot of trouble now.

Yeah, those aliums
look pretty mad.

We got to help her.

Twins:
why?

Aw, come on.

Cynthia, what do we do now?

Good idea.

[ High-pitched beeps]

Cool, cynthia-- aminals.

Psst.

Did you say something?

No, over here.

You mean me?

Shh! You want them to hear?

What's your
name, kid?

That's for me to know

And you to find out--
what's yours?

Call me george.

I'm from the planet fishiokia.

Fishy-who?

Fishiokia.

Take a right at alpha centauri.

Oh.

Get me out of here.

I'm on the menu
for dinner.

Yeah? What's in it for me?

Ever been queen
of your own planet?

Do I get a crown?

Hey, there she is!

Stand back!

Robot:
danger! Danger! Danger! Danger!

What's going on, tommy?

I don't know,
chuckie.

Phil:
hey, this is fun.

Lil:whee!

I knew this wasn't
a good idea.

Wow, what happened?

I turned off
the gravity-- hurry!

What do I do?

Do like me-- swim, kid, swim.

[ Thud]

Quick, in here.

These doors do
open automatically.

Let's go.

Stuvon:oh, no!

The earthling grabbed
a shuttlecraft!

You mean the being
of inferior intelligence?

That one?

Go for it.

[ Whirring]

[ Hiss]

[ Boom]

Angelica:
cool!

All:
toys!

[ Giggling]

Boy, I want to
remember this forever.

I was wondering...

Yeah?

Could I get

A picture of you?

Just as a souvenir.

Sure!

Oh, great.

Put on these.

You're going to be queen.

Could you back up
just a little bit?

Little more.

Uh, just a little
over to the left, okay?

Hey!

So long, sucker!

[ Cackling]

Fishiokia, here I come!

Great, cynthia, just great.

[ Laughing]

Hey, tommy

I wonder what
this button does.

Hey, what's
going on?

Uh-oh...

Look!

[ Screaming]

[ Laughing]

[ Giggling]

Grab the controls!

[ Barks]

I can't get at them.

[ Laughing]

Look!

[ All scream]

[ Gasps]

[ Crickets chirping]

Angelica:
I'm the queen, cynthia

And I said dig for food.

Now dig!

Grandpa:
ever had an
adventure, scout?

You're probably
too young.

The one thing
about an adventure is

It's unpredictable.

Hey!

Can't have an adventure
without provisions.

That's the mistake your
great-great-granddad made

When he went to the south pole.

Ended up eating his shoelaces.

[ Gasps]

Would you
look at that?

This is what I call a car.

Nice, huh?

I'll say.

Takes me back

To my private eye days
in the ' s.

Mind if I sit behind
the wheel for a minute?

Just for old times' sake.

Doesn't bother me.
I'll do the driving,
and tommy, you're in back.

That sedan's been tailing us.

If it's trouble they want,
they got it.

Trouble's my business.

This is terrific.

[ Gasps]

[ Wheels screech]

[ Sigh]

I've still got it.

Ha!

Hey, uh, what happened
to your car?

Wasn't my car.

That's my car.

Oh, no!

Tommy!

[ Echoing:]
tommy! Tommy! Tommy!

[ Door creaks]

Oooh.

Ah...

Miss emma,
miss clarice?

Woman:
in the parlor, max.

[ Meows]

Oh, max, what isthat?

It appears to be
a child, miss clarice.

Male, slightly damp.

Heavens!

A child!

Do we have a child?

Certainly not, emma.

Unless... Max!

You've taken
a wife?

Oh, a wedding!

I love weddings.

I was almost married once,
you know.

The child, ladies.

Oh, the child.

What a dear, sweet
thing it is, too.

[ Cooing]

He was in
the duesenberg.

Shall I inform
the authorities?

Of course, of course.

Look at the darling smile.

Why, he resembles
our father, the judge.

You're right,
sister.

Why, he's
the perfect likeness.

Max, where are you going?

To phone the authorities.

I'm sure they'll send someone
for the infant at once.

Oh, no, max.

Certainly not.

This child came

For a reason.

Obviously he was
sent to us

To be heir
to the pendragons.

And the pendragon millions.

Oh, max, something's all wet.

Max:
"millions"

Is exaggerated.

I haven't been paid in years.

What am I going to do?

If stu and didi ever...
Now, now, calm down.

Remember the ' s.

If anybody can find tommy,
it's lou pickles, private eye.

I don't know nothing
about no car.

Perhaps thiswill remind you.

A coupon for detergent?

You're not with
supermarket security?

No, I'm looking
for my grandson.

Uh, okay, the car,
I've seen it before.

Belongs to a guy named max.

Wears a uniform.

Talks funny, too.

Any idea where max lives?

Uh... I got to
go now-- sorry.

Wait, where are you going?

What's going on here?

[ Meowing]

Max:
this is

Mrs. Balliwick's
cod liver soup.

It's good for you.

And now you will eat.

Please eat, please.

Has bostwick finished supper?

Bostwick?

Oh, yes.

Named after father.

It's only right.

Of course.

We're giving him

A bath.

Isn't it
marvelous?

With mineral
spirits
just as father prescribed.

Fetch the sulphur cakes
and scouring pads.

As good as done, sister,
as good as done.

[ Tittering]

[ Sighs]

What?

Bostwick?

Oh, bostwick!

Bostwick!

We've got to
find him, max.

Come back,
bostwick.

Phew, that was close.

Awk, that was
close, that
was close.

You can talk?

You can talk.

Yeah, but I didn't
know birds could.

Are those ladies
keeping you, too?

Crazy ladies, crazy.

I miss my grandpa.

Listen, let's get out
of here, all right?

All right, all right.

What's your name?

My name's tommy.

My name's tommy.

You're tommy too?

I never met
another tommy before.

Come on, tommy.

What's the meaning of this?

Excellent, sir.

I like a man
who speaks his mind.

Well, i...

I have heard

That you're
asking questions.

Too many questions can be bad.

Did you know
that, mister...

Pickles-- lou pickles.

Mr. Pickles, I'll warn you.

Keep asking questions

And you might find
the answers not to your liking.

Is that a thr*at?

Oh, two such
gentlemen of the world

Hardly have need
of threats, sir.

I'm sure we can come to

Some sort of mutually
beneficial understanding.

Here are enough coupons

To keep a man
in chips and dip for life

Ifhe's the sort of man

Who knows when to stop
asking questions.

Keep your coupons.

I'll keep asking questions

Until I find my grandson.

I admire your determination,
mr. Pickles.

I regret that it may end up
costing you your courtesy card.

Rocco, see mr. Pickles
off the premises.

How do we get
out of here, tommy?

Get out of here, tommy.

No! Either we
get out together

Or nobody gets out.

Clarice:
bostwick!

Are you
up here?

Quick!

Wow.

Somebody's mommy
and daddy

Sure don't clean much.

We better find
somewhere to hide.

Good idea, tommy.

Sister, he
wouldn't have come

Into the judge's room.

No one's been
in here since...

Oh, I know, emma.

But sometimes
babies aren't

As respectful
as they might be.

Bostwick, are
you in here?

Awk, in here, in here.

You squealed!

Sister, it's bostwick!

I've found him!

Bostwick, are you
all right?

See how he
found his way

To the
judge's room?

He was born to
be a pendragon.

Obviously.

Bostwick, you'll
have such fun.

When you're
old enough

You'll go to
the m*llitary academy.

And then to fair harvard.

[ Giggling]

[ Gasps]

Cone or cup?

I need information.

I saw nothing.

Washington seems
to think different.

Tell me about max.

I don't know any max.

All right, mister.

He comes in
every tuesday

And orders
a bavarian mint swirl.

Now tell me where max lives
and I'll walk out that door

And you can serve
these fine people.

Selma drive
a place called gray gardens.

[ Doorbell]

Both:
who could that be?

Yes?

Chimney sweep.

Our chimneys are perfect.

We will not require
your services.

Chimneys can be tricky.

Mind if I look?

Sir, i...

I'd say you have to be max.

What? Who are you?

Why are you here?

I'm looking for a baby.

I don't know
what you mean.
Really? Maybe I should
have the police interpret.

That won't be necessary.

Please, walk this way.

I'm looking for a baby.

There must be
some mistake.

There have been no children here
for over years.

Begging your pardon, ladies

But that rattle
argues otherwise.

Oh, dear.

Oh, that.

[ Laughs]

That rattle belongs
to my sister.

She's not quite right.

Emma, you know
as well as I

The rattle is yours.

She's a bit touched.

Tommy is my grandson

And I'll do what I have to
to get him back.

His grandson, clarice.

[ Whispering]

Do you have any
proof, mr. Pickles

That this child is
indeed your grandson?

Proof! Why, i...

There is the pickles
family birthmark.

Oh, my!

We were thinking
more along the lines

Of a snapshot.

A snapshot?

Why, I got a million of them!

Ladies:
look at the big eyes,
ooh, the cutest.

So bob o'reilly
was your butler.

Goodness, yes.

I played gin rummy
with bob for years.

A remarkable card player.

Got him into trouble
a couple of times.

I can vouch for that.

Ooh, look at the time.

Good-bye, louis.

Good-bye,
bostwick.
Bostwick?