03x13 - Princess Angelica/The Odd Couple

[bunniefuu]

[ Gasps]

[ Angelica humming]

Drew:
angelica!

Cynthia!
Look what you made me do!

That's okay. I'm creative.

I don't have to color
inside the lines.

We'll make it nighttime.

How's the cleanup coming a..?

Angelica, you haven't
cleaned up any of your toys.

Like my drawing?

Remember how daddy

And angelica made a deal?

Daddy buys angelica the $
video game, and angelica

Cleans up her room once a month?

I didn't feel like it.

Whether or not
you feellike it

Your toys have
to be put away, got it?

Starting next month.

Angelica,
this is the end of the line.

I'm going to have
to take some action.

I'm... I'm talking
to mommy about your behavior.

I want my fax machine repaired.

I don't care if it's sunday.

It's monday in japan.

Hi, friends.

Broken toaster?

Tv on the fritz?

Jammed fax machine?

Call sal fusco

Home office king.

Call me day and night,
seven days a week.

Call -king.

That's -k-i-n-g.

Remember.
I'll treat youlike royalty.

Call this guy on tv,
the home office king.

Charlotte, i...

What happened

To good service?

Charlotte, it's about angelica.

Our little princess?
That's exactly who I mean.

Have you noticed
angelica's been acting

Like a real princess?

A real princess?

Drew, that's great.

If angelica's to make it

In a male-dominated
power structure

She's got to eat, breathe,
drink, and sweat self-esteem.

I know we've been blessed, but
if we don't stop spoiling her

She'll suspect
she really isa princess.

Hear that, cynthia?

Wait till I tell the babies.

Tommy:
so let me get this straight.

You're a real princess?

I heard
my mommy and daddy talking.

That's what they said.

And then they said
I wasn't supposed to find out.

If you're a princess,
how come you don't have a crown?

How come you don't live
in a castle?

How come your mommy and daddy
aren't a king and a queen?

Those grown-ups downstairs--

Mr. And mrs. Pickles
or whatever their name is--

They're not
my real mommy and daddy.

They're my evil stepparents.

I'm not really your cousin?

Sorry, tommy,
you're just a simple pheasant.

My real mommy and daddy
are a king and queen

And they'd never yell at me
or make me put away toys

Or do nothing mean to me at all.

Uh, angelica.

How do we know
you're a princess?

We'll do a test
like in the fairy tales.

We'll do
the princess rapoozzle test.

What's that?

If angelica's a princess,
we can climb up her hair.

Climb up my hair?

Princess rapoozzle had

This prince climb up her hair
practically every night.

It's the only way
we'll know.

Fine. Phil, lil,
climb up my hair.

Are you sure
you won't get mad?

'Course I'm sure.

Now climb up my hair.

[ Screaming]

Let go! Let go my hair!

Ow! What's the matter
with you?

That's no way
to treat a princess.

This is
"the princess and the pea" test.

We'll know for sure.

Real princesses' skin
is so soft

They feel a pea
through lots of blankets.

I can feel it when phil pees
through a lot of blankets.

Does that make me a princess?

No, that just makes
you both disgusting.

Chuckie, where's that pea
you were getting?

Uh, well, I kind of got hungry
on the way upstairs.

You ate it?

Well, yeah

But I found something else
on the kitchen floor.

Will a fork work?

Give me that.

[ Grunting]

[ Screaming]

[ Babies laughing]

You did it.

You're a real princess.

You didn't get
all the way up the pile

And it still hurt.

We didn't use a real pea.

Aw, now we'll never know.

Okay, okay.
One more test.

And this time

No one better
eat any of it.

It's just like cindereller.

If the slipper fits,
it means I'm a princess.

Tommy, bring in the slipper.

Go ahead,
put it on me.

It fits! It fits!

Angelica,
you're a real princess.

This proves it.

Well, I hope
you babies are satisfied.

I'm sorry we ever questioned
you, princess angelica.

I forgive you, charles.

I'm going to let
you be my royal footman.

Wow! Thanks, angelica.

What do I get to do first?

The royal feet.

Now help me pack.

My real daddy will be here soon

To rescue me
and frisk me off to the palace.

[ Grunting]

Come on, servants.

We're going downstairs
to wait for the king.

[ Grunting]

Want a lollipop,
princess angelica?

Why, thank you, thomas.

Where is he?

He'll be here any minute.

Yep. Any minute now

He'll take me away
from my evil stepparents.

He's not coming.

He's leaving me
with the pickles.

They'll make me
clean up my toys, brush my teeth

And never have any fun.

My life is over.

That's too bad, angelica.

The king just forgot about you.

Maybe they had a rebolution.

No!

He didn't forget.

You're a real
princess, right?

Yeah.

Princesses might get
taken from their real parents.

Princesses might have to
live with evil stepparents

And be made
to clean up toys

But whenever there's
a princess in trouble

Sooner or later
she gets rescued

And, angelica, you're
going to get rescued too!

I'd like to believe you,
but you're just a baby.

I'm doomed to live out my days
with a bunch of ordinary...

[ Doorbell chimes]

Look!

Angelica:
it's the king!

Lil:
look at his car.

Phil:
it's even got a crown on it.

You mrs. Pickles?

Yes, and you must be...

Sal fusco, home office king.

Where's the fax?

Uh, right this way.

That's the king!

I don't know, angelica.

He didn't look
very much like a king.

Yeah, where's his crown?

And his robe?

He's in disguise.

He can go wherever he wants,
and commoners won't bother him.

Help me get my stuff
to the royal car.

You're
really leaving?

Of course.
I'm going to the castle.

Aren't you saying good-bye
to your mommy and daddy?

Nah, they never let
me do anything fun.

Help me get out of here
while I still can.
[ Grunting]

Tommy:
wow! It sure looks fancy.

Only the best
for the princess.

Come on, help me in.

Can we come with you

To the palace and play
with your diamonds and furs?

Ride on the royal ponies?

Watch the royal television?

Sorry. That stuff's
only for princesses

But you can have my old room
with that junk in it.

Wow!

Thanks, angelica.

You got to clean it up

Once a month.

Scat before somebody sees you.

Hey, angelica!

Get out of here!

Want me to get caught?

I just wanted to say...

I'll miss you.

Me too.

And me too.and me too.

Maybe someday you babies

Can come and play at the palace.

Kneel down for a second.

Angelica, the last time
you made me do this...

I want to knight you guys.

I'm scared of the dark.

No, no, no, knightyou.

You know,
make you important people.

Like princesses?

Not quite, but close.

Now go ahead, kneel.

Sir phil,
eater of earthworms.

Lady lil,
loudest screamer in the land.

Sir charles,
fraidycat extraordinaire.

And sir thomas

The bravest baby
of them all.

Wow! Thanks, angelica.

My pleasure, sir thomas.

Now I got to go. Bye.

All:
bye!

When you learn to write,
drop us a postcard!

Okay, tommy!

There she goes,
angelica the princess.

Charlotte:
what do you mean,
bucks?

You pay for quality.

Just to look at it?

Well, we did it.

It's a princess' life
for me, cynthia.

Nothing but video games, ponies

And chocolate chip cookies!

[ Door slamming]

I need it back
tomorrow morning.

Yeah, don't they all.

Wow.

She's really leaving.

I hope she'll be happy
with king sal.

Let's check out her toys.

Yeah!

This palace thing
is going to be great.

I'll just be sitting
on my throne

And reading comic books
all day long.

And best of all

I won't ever have to see
those evil stepparents again.

Why would I miss them?

All they ever did
was make me clean up my room

And read me bedtime stories
and kiss me good night

And take care of me
when I'm sick and...

Oh, cynthia,
I made a terrible mistake.

What will I do?

Good idea, cynthia.

Help! Let me out of here!

Help, mr. King person!

Help!

Things at the castle
got kind of boring

And I decided to come home.

But you're still a princess.

Let's let that be
our little secret.

Charlotte:
thanks for bringing
her home, sal.

Sorry
about the trouble.

No trouble.

When you spend time

Around office equipment,
you learn about kids.

Your fax just needed
another roll of paper.

How silly of me.

$ , Please.

What?

You're the best daddy ever!

You're the sweetest
little girl, princess.

Daddy, can I ask you a favor?

Anything, princess.

Don't call me "princess."

She's going to go
to the police station

'Cause her mommy was stolen.

No, lil, she's going
to the fire station

'Cause her puppy's
up a tree.

Police station, phil.

Fire station, lil.

Police!

Fire!

Chuckie:
stop!

What in bob's name

Do you think you're doing?

Just playing
with your bogo blocks.

We weren't going to take them
or anything.

I know, I know.

It's just that, well...

I worked really hard
to get them ezackly right

And I'd rather
not mess them up.

Fine, chuckie.

Yeah, have it
your way.

Yes, I'd like the answer
to one across.

Wait.
Also tell me two across?

Uh-huh. Three across?

Okay.

Could you hold on a second?

I have another call.

Hello...

Oh, hi, stu.

The holiday weekend, huh?

Yeah, sounds nice.

Oh, no, you know tommy's
always welcome here.

Bring him over.

I've got to go.

I'm paying $ a minute
on the other line.

No, stu, it's
the crossword puzzle help line.

Yes,
could you give me the answer

To number one down?

Hi, didi.

Hi, charles.

Thanks for looking
after tommy.

Stu and I
have been looking forward

To this cheese-tasting tour
for months.

Bye-bye, sweetie.

Mommy will be back

After the long weekend.

Charles, I've got
a few phone numbers here.

Tonight we'll be at olga's
cheese inn in waukesha.

Tomorrow
we'll be leaving waukesha

For lacrosse where...

Hey, guys, I'm staying over
for a long weekend.

Wow!

How long is that?

I don't know,
but it's the longest

I've ever been away.

This will be fun.

Uh-oh.uh-oh.

What?what?

You want to tell them,
lil?

Maybe you better.

All right. See...
If you guys live together

You're going to start fighting
all the time.

Come on, guys, me and chuckie
are bestest friends.

Sure... Now.

But soon you'll start
to bug each other.

First, it's little things
like forgetting to share a toy.

But it will get worse.

Everything they do
will bug you.

The way they drink
their milk.

Or roll a ball.

The way she wears
her ribbon.

The stupid, ugly duck
on his shirt!

Her shoes
are never tied!

His diaper smells like poop!

Guys, guys.

Where do you get
these crazy ideas?

Yeah. You two guys live together
without any problems.

[ Sighs][ sighs]

Your dad's
a great cook.

We never have

Carrot puree at home.

Wait till you try
his mashed peas.

They don't know what
they're talking about.

We're going
to get along great.

'Course we are.

Hey, let's go play
with mr. Banana-head.

Uh, tommy...

Hold on a sec.

Something wrong, chuckie?

Well, yeah-- you forgot
to clean up the blocks.

Clean up the blocks?

I don't understand.

Well, when you're done
playing with a toy

You put it away.

Chuckie, we're babies.

We have parents to do
that stuff for us.

No, tommy. We got
to put the blocks away.

A clean room
is a happy room. See?

Like this?

Well, actually,
you got to put them away

By color and size.

The blue ones go here

The red ones are next,
then green

And you always

Go from big to small,
big to small.

Big to small?

Yup, big to small.

Gosh, in my house

We never spend all this time
putting blocks away.

Night, chuckie.

Night, tommy.

Boy, I'm tired.

Night, tommy.

Hey, chuckie?

Yeah?

I'm really glad
we're friends.

Me, too, tommy.

Hey, chuckie.

Yeah?

I'm really glad
I'm staying over.

Me, too, tommy.

Even if you do
waste a lot of time

Putting away your blocks.

Hey, chuckie.

What?! Tommy, what?

I'm trying to sleep.

Oh, nothing really.

I was just thinking
about green jell-o.

Green jell-o?

Yeah, how do they do it?

Do what?!

Make it green.

I don't know, tommy.

Just go to sleep.

How dothey make it green?

Hey, chuckie.

Huh?

What is this stuff?

Dummi bear sugar lumps.

Don't you like them?

At my house,
we have reptar cereal.

Sorry, tommy, but this
is what my dad buys.

Plus, look-- you get a free
dummi bear whistle inside.

You get a dinosaur
in reptar cereal.

It's no big deal, chuckie.

I like staying at your house

Even if you do have
yucky cereal.

We can't abort
the entire mission

For one teddy bear.

It's not logical.

You and your infernal logic.

Can't you see--
we're babies, not computers?

What are you doing?

Space trek babies
is my favorite show.

I was just
changing the channel.

In my house,
we always watch reptar.

Hey, is something wrong,
chuckie?

Oh, no, nothing at all.

Huh! Who? What? Oh.

You see, phil,
when we're done

We'll put you
in the mailbox

And send you to china.

Neat.

So, how's everything going
with you guys?

Are you driving each other
crazy yet?

Don't be silly, phil.

We're getting along great.

We've been playing with blocks
and watching reptar

And having fun,
right, chuckie?

What? Oh, yeah.

Lots of fun.

Hey, I'm going to go
get some more stamps.

I'll be right back.

Guys, I can't
take it anymore.

Everything we do,
he complains.

"In my house,
we do it this way."

"In my house, we do it
that way."

What am I going to do?

I hate to say it, but

We told you so.we told you so.

No, tommy, no!

What's wrong, chuckie?

What's wrong?! What's wrong?!

Look what you did!

It's all ruined!

What's all ruined, chuckie?

The bogo block village!

The police car
is at the fire station.

The truck's at the airport.

The airplane's
on the restaurant.

Buildings are moved, and you've
taken apart city hall!

At my house, we do stuff
like this all the time.

My house! My house! My house!

Let me tell you something,
tommy.

This is my house,
and when you're in my house

Sometimes you've got
to do things my way.

Wow, chuckie.

I'm really sorry.

It's okay, tommy.

You didn't know.

Here, let me show you
where everything goes.

The airplane goes
in the airport, okay?

I guess that makes sense.

The police car
goes in the police station.

The fire truck--

Goes in the fire station.

Great. Now let me show you
where the teddy bears go.

So, how bad is it, chuckie?

Is he still
driving you nuts?

Actually, guys,
me and tommy had a little talk

And now everything's going fine.

I got the keys.

Okay, chuckie,
your turn to hide them.

I'll be back in a sec.

I can't take it anymore.

Every time I play
with a toy

You got to put it away
just right.

The puzzle goes like this.

The teddy bear goes like that.

If I watch space trek babies
again, I'm going to quack.

We told you so.we told you so.

Uh, tommy, do you remember

What I told you
about the blocks?

Yeah, chuckie, I put them away
by size and color

Big to small, big to small.

You forgot shape.

Shape?!

This block is a fryangle.

It should be put in
with the fryangles

And this block
is a square

So it should go

With the other squares.

And this block is a...
Well, it's a funny-looking shape

And it should go with the other
funny-looking shapes.

Let me asplain it again.

You see, this block
is a fryangle...

You're just going

To leave them
like that?

Red and blue blocks
are mixed

The squares are
with the fryangles

And you don't even care!

You really don't care!

[ Bawling]

[ Bawling][ bawling]

Hey, chuckie.

What?

I'm sorry I got mad at you

And I'm sorry I messed up
your blocks.

Really?

Uh-huh.

It's just that, well...

I miss my mommy and daddy

And I miss myhouse

And I miss doing
everything my way.

Well, I'm sorry
I got mad at you too.

I guess sometimes

Everyone just needs
to be in their own house

And do things
their own way.

Hey, chuckie,
aren't you cold?

Here, take
some more blanket.

Thanks.

He was no trouble.

Hello, tommy.

We missed you.

By the way, thanks
for the limburger loaf.

Night, night, sweetie.