01x17 - Still Excelling

[bunniefuu]

[Music]

I'm gonna watch my tiny fourth video

again again we don't have to put the

tape in Tina just listen to daddy's head

because it's always playing in here I

don't hear anything try is Tommy there's

like a whole marching band going on in

there the corned beef sections tuning up

right now I'll watch my video and set

and there it is the music that goes in

your ears and up your spine lift in your

head till the day you die but sweetie

we're watching your video please please

please should never etat her please okay

fine I have a purple no I'm using it

well you're going outside the lines I'm

not going outside the line oh yeah oh my

god oh my hand you first oh you and the

count of three one two three go sh**t a

big baby what kind of example are we set

for Tina where's Tina this always

happens she leaves and we end up

coloring her coloring books and watching

her videos she has the attention span of

a gnat oh look feel the squirrels

dancing Oh

[Applause]

[Music]

what are you doing here yeah I had to

run some errands so I thought I'd come

by so you didn't have kicked for thanks

mom okay since you're here could you

take me and Tiffany to the mall drop us

off for a couple hours and then maybe

take us to mcdonalds or I could take you

to the mall and spank you in front all

your friends I'm gonna go get my stuff

oh hello mrs. Miller hey mrs. Cass are

you look really good for someone who

spends the whole day in a room full of

8th graders I have a good cry at lunch

Oh house Lauren doing in science she's

getting by hey how's Brian now he was a

great science student he's fine but you

never know Lauren could surprise you

yeah they don't usually better news

right who knows you know what they say

sometimes lightning strikes twice that's

actually not what they say Brian can

explain it to you so you ready oh wait

show me around class why because I'm

interested in what you do in class okay

this is where he fist that's the cost

that I watched and that's the magic door

sets me free now come on I'll show you

yeah looks like spun what's all this

stuff over here our class projects while

an alternate energy source wind

generator yeah this Doug creamers funny

how he can build one of those they can't

get himself drole de loop where's your

project oh it's stupid come on the snow

I would see it and a moldy sandwich yeah

who knew I find a science project in the

bottom of my locker on Lauren these

other kids really put an effort into

their project it doesn't seem like you

even tried those kids got their parents

to help them you know I am always here

to help you honey didn't even help me

make the sandwich look we don't ask a

lot but we do after you try your best

what's the point the teacher pretty much

tells me I'll never be as good Brian

Brian was in my honors class Brian got

all a's Brian's gonna be a million

Oh Lauren she just really she said I

mean she was probably just trying to

motivate you you know what we are gonna

go home and I'm gonna help you come up

with a project that's really going to

impress mrs. Cutler all right sure when

she said millionaire did she mean soon

[Music]

Lauren I found another website that had

more detailed instructions on how to

build the tornado simulator according to

this what are you doing oh I'm working

on his sign I thought I'd make it all

glittery and that I thought I could put

something around the edges and maybe add

some more sparkly stickers well that

would be great if the tornado we're

going through vegas let's get back to

the project and we'll do the sign later

as a reward that I finished the project

you did good for you you see with a

little motivation you can achieve

anything does it feel good what the heck

happened here it's my tornado simulator

was a tornado coming through when you

made it pretty good to me well it is

good but it could be great come on let's

show mrs. Cutler what Lauren Miller can

do this is what Warren Miller can do

well this is a good start we need to fix

it up a little bit we'll take some glue

and some tape or we could take it apart

and they do it but that would be like

starting over good idea

hey honey how you doing terrible I just

pulled the worst game of my whole life

uh-huh I come home from a hard night

bowling and drinking with my friends you

don't even pretend to care sorry sweetie

did you drink a lot of beer tonight I

forget it the moments passed what are

you doing it I'm helping lauren build

her tornado simulator why I picked her

up at school today and her science

project was the crappiest one there oh

maybe science isn't her thing well maybe

that's because of us Oh Judy it's

definitely because of us he stunk at

science but in our defense we're very

lazy people who tire easily so we need

to encourage our daughter to do better I

mean I think the reason we were lazy is

because we never had to help Brian or

motivate him to do his homework yeah I

love that little freaking nature

Lawrence teachers already written her

off and it's our fault we should have

been helping her all along so where is

she now I sent her to bed she was

screwing it all up well if you really

want to help her why are you just

slapping it together with cardboard and

tape what are you saying del are you

trying to make a tornado here and if

someone sneeze it on this thing it's

gonna fall apart I need the double

wallet here I'll show you where's the

level i didn't use a level you didn't

use a level

two in the morning you guys are still up

yep almost up is that my project it's

awesome and a great job you should be

very proud she home yet no well maybe

she stayed late after school cuz they

had a big party for her because a

project was so good yeah I feel that

happens live oh you're a cool

instead act cool not act like your

father when you saw Mary Tyler Moore

beer hey guys only Wow usually you just

say that with your eyes hell or in a

little bit with her science project and

she's getting her grade on it today and

we're just a little anxious to see how

she did yeah you were always the way as

at science duty remember the project you

did in junior high I believe the title

was will punching my younger sister

result in her doing my science project

from here oh yeah I got an a on that hey

pretty good got my grades back on my

science project how'd you do uh I mean

how do you do I got me everybody's got

my project was pretty cool to you for

all your help so this mrs. Cutler is she

an easy grader or arrays tough to come

by did she notice that the corners were

mitered you know I don't know I just

kind of got my a and got out of there

I'm gonna go call Tiffany oh you should

be so proud of yourself honey thanks mom

and dad you see that Phil you see how

good she feels about herself she knows

she can do it we got a guy

oh it's so nice to see you guys to

finally taken an interest in junior high

only took a 25 years you have kids I'm

sure you and donor sample 3256 will feel

the same way we do oh and one more thing

mrs. Cutler wants to talk to you guys

tomorrow at school sure thing sweetie

we'll be there no problem you guys are

so busted what are you talking about

come on don't you see Lauren's returning

in moldy bread all semester then all of

a sudden she shows up for the tornado

machine I think the teacher knows you

guys did the project oh my god bill

she's right we are so busted so good you

just had to miter the corners didn't you

I wasn't the only one holding that level

you were there too and I'll rat you out

in a heartbeat I think the two of you

should just go down there and come clean

or you could come up with a plan for us

no outside committed you're going to

push me are you

and I'm going to tell her that if she

doesn't think a thirteen-year-old girl

could build a project like that and she

is under estimating Lauren's potential

which is demeaning and sexist would you

stop playing with that stuff you don't

know what the hell you're doing it could

be dangerous they're not gonna give a

bunch of eighth-graders dangerous

bubbling bubbling bubbling do you think

we're I'm sorry to keep you waiting mr.

and mrs. Miller you have it going long

day I caught two students cheating and

had to give them detention oh I hate

cheaters we talk farm not to cheat a

long time ago you know I'd like to talk

to you about Lauren's project Lauren did

a project that's when all the hammering

and sawing wow you never know what these

kids and their crazy music these days

it's just what I've never seen work like

this from Lauren before how when she

works hard who knows what she can

accomplish exactly which is why I'm

thinking of moving her into my honors

science class really yeah it's a lot

more work but if she did this I know she

can handle it or work well I'm sure

she'll adjust to it but just to be sure

I have to ask you one question did you

get any outside help on this project you

mean from us yeah of course not for

brian paul god no he had nothing to do

with it they can't stand each other

we've done a very poor job of teaching

them to get along my wife works I watch

a lot of TV on that case I owe you an

apology mrs. Miller I might have sold

Lauren a little short sometimes kids do

surprise you thank you for coming by

thank you well we did it we help Lauren

and class that was too hard for and got

her into a class that is much much she's

gonna love on her side ah she's gonna be

thrilled so we're just gonna lie to each

other till it hits the fame all right

cissus crying stop it stop it I'm sorry

there's nothing funny about your sister

being an honor science we want me to

stop anything but you keep saying I'm

done can't believe I have to be a stupid

honors class so lucky hey I was in mrs.

Cutler's honors class right you're not a

geek you're the coolest kid ever to wear

Vulcan ears in their class picture

here's make fun of me but Cutlass honor

science 5 is hard she'll be fine will

help for every step of the way you guys

are gonna help with honors class yes we

are while you're in there you might want

to check for a chest hair Thomas class

it's a class for the smartest people in

the school and your sister is going to

be in it okay both the upstairs

Hey Judy did you know the temperature of

the Earth's core is 4,000 degrees

Celsius or you could wear a chicken on

your back and added cooking like a sack

of have you guys seen my text box from

the library yep they're right here we

use them to build a box you know but I

need them for my report which I have to

finish because I have to get to the

library to meet my lab partner all my

other from work show me to get all this

stuff done oh there's more pressure in

here than the Earth's core which by the

way is 1.4 billion times the atmospheric

pressure oh my god I'm learning your

father and i'll do the volcano in the

paper you go meet your partner at the

library you mean it yes thanks guy

through the best judy judy judy what are

you doing I thought we agreed to build a

stratovolcano that's it that's it oh no

no no this isn't a stratovolcano this is

a shield mounting the best did you even

read the chapter book and you think you

could do a better job there's a plinian

eruption caused massive destruction all

right volcano I'll do the paper but you

better do a good job because Lauren's

great depends on it fine how about a

little less blobbity blobbity little

more type of heat I pity

[Music]

what are you doing here I can lauren up

from school that a camera yeah I wanted

to get a picture of me with my volcanoe

your volcano that is so pathetic let's

see what I got on my paper

mr. and mrs. Miller what are you doing

here uh we came to pick up lauren she

had five third period now oh well she

wanted us to drop by and take a picture

of me with a project I don't know why

why don't you make again Judy a volcano

or there it is a lot of nice project

here nothing that have wiped out a whole

village but they're cute wait a minute

she gotta see on this project what a C

the C stand for congratulations on your

a great not it seems Lauren turned this

into more of an art project she even has

this action figure running away from the

lava oh I suppose you'd have him running

towards a llama well I make it more

about how the volcano actually functions

it functions to scare the crap out of

those villagers I'll I think what she's

trying to say here bill is that it was

the volcano and that's a report together

to see actually it was a combination of

the two I thought the report sort of

rambled on without coming to any kind of

conclusion how could you brief look I'm

sure lauren is still adjusting to

working at this level which is gonna

have to try a little harder on her next

project we gotta do two weeks well we're

gonna have to try a lot harder I don't

have the time I work at the store

starting to suffer the other day the

guys were going on about some new TV

show I had no idea what they were

talking about it oh we gotta help her we

got her into this if she fails out of

this class is gonna be humiliating for

her well I guess we're just gonna have

to dig deep and find some way to do this

come on

so let me get this straight you want me

to help you a warranty preferably

without her knowing are there any rules

in this house anymore yeah yeah yeahs

brush your teeth don't do dr*gs are you

gonna help us or not well well suddenly

Ryan's not just a big geek anymore but

the most important person in this house

Brian don't make us beg or tell all your

friends you're afraid of clowns I'm not

afraid of clowns topic Hey Ya Ya your

cats having kittens you don't know who

the father is your information I'm

pretty sure it's a cabbie who goes by

the name of McDaniel pop art not

important the big news is Lawrence got a

boyfriend I just heard the mall holding

hands with him what but she said she was

at the library with her lab partner and

why would a kid raised in this house

think it's okay to lie quiet are you

sure what huh yes you had that purple

coat on that I got her last Christmas

unless I just got her in trouble in

which case it wasn't her at all no no no

now that i think about it it was a brown

jacket and the girl with the Chinese boy

I'm home from the library she said lying

so how is the library Lauren the library

great did you guys finish those

flashcards for my solar system test oh

yeah we decided not to do those do you

mean you guys promised you'd help me oh

maybe we'll go with you to the library

tomorrow we can check out some books

maybe go to the gap hold hands with a

boy and that's the sh*t I was waiting

for Brian upstairs wait you told on me

nobody patch I'm just gonna go to the

mall right now worry it's not pin yet

today oh hey Lauren I love you want to

explain why you've been lying to us

kiyoshi I've been hanging out with my

lab partner David all week yeah well we

were on to you from the beginning we

were so angry we t*nk that volcano

project of yours I hope you enjoyed the

sea we purposely got you Lauren is angry

as I am I must admit some of this is our

fault if it weren't fresh wouldn't be in

a class it's overwhelming you I think

you should go back to your old class but

I like this class listen why aren't you

doing your homework if you guys are

doing it for me are you sure you're not

stay in this class just because of this

boy David he's really cute Lauren this

shouldn't be about David this should be

about you you're a young smart woman you

should want to work hard to motivate

yourself and achieve your own gold this

is him damn he is jon bon jovi pretty

get there and study wow we did all this

stuff to motivate our daughter all it

took was a cute boy but she is motivated

yeah this hadn't been a complete

accident it would really smack a good

parenting and they said we weren't fit

to bring children into this world

hey where are those people now at my

parents house yeah