02x02 - Boys in the Band/Hex Games

[bunniefuu]

♪♪ Timmy is an average kid ♪

♪♪ That no one understands ♪

♪♪ Mom and dad and vicky ♪

♪♪ Always giving him commands ♪

Bad twerp!

♪♪ Doom and gloom up in his room ♪♪

♪♪ Is broken instantly ♪

♪♪ By his magic little fish who'll grant his every wish ♪♪

♪♪ 'Cause in reality... ♪

♪♪ They are his oddparents, fairly oddparents ♪♪

Wands and wings.floaty, crowny things.

♪♪ Oddparents, fairly oddparents ♪♪

♪♪ Really mod, peapod, buff bod, hot rod ♪♪

Obtuse, rubber goose,

Green moose, guava juice.

Giant snake, birthday cake,

Large fries, chocolate shake!

♪♪ Oddparents, fairly oddparents ♪♪

♪♪ It flips your lid when you are a kid ♪♪

♪♪ With fairly oddparents ♪

Yeah, right.

[Snoring]

[Beep]

Good morning, dimsdale!

Do you know why it's good?

Because today's my birthday!

Right?

Nope,

Because tonight's the night

Of the big chip skylark concert!

And here's his new hit song--

"My shiny teeth and me."

♪♪ When I'm feelin'-- ♪

Ha ha ha!

♪♪ Sad as I can be... ♪

Chip skylark?

That lame, pretty boy, dork singer?

He stinks!

Does not!

I wish chip skylark was around when I had a band!

We would've rocked out loud!

Did you know I used to play the electric triangle?

But your band stunk!

Ha ha ha!

But with chip we wouldn't have.

Ahem!

Isn't there something special you want to say to me?

Considering what day it is?

Yeah, pipe down!

So I can jam to this awesome chip song!

Aaahhh!

Thank you, karma.

Can't wait to see what mom made me

For my special birthday dinner!

Cookies for dinner!?

With our phone number on them!

Sure, tonight's the night of the chip skylark concert.

Your mom and I are gonna throw

These to chip while he's on stage!

And maybe he'll call us and offer to be your big brother!

You guys are going to the concert?

Tonight of all nights?

What's so special about chip skylark?

Open your eyes, son. That teen's delicious.

[Giggling]

Uhh! Good gosh, son!

We have a special surprise for you!

A surprise? What is it? What?!

It's vicky!

Hello, mr. And mrs. Turner.

Hello, kid who's not chip skylark.

She's being paid quadruple to baby-sit

So we can go to the chip skylark concert tonight.

And there's extra money in there

So you kids can watch the concert on pay-per-view!

Have a fun chip-filled night!

[Exit music plays]

Welcome to chip watchtonight.

I'm your host chet you-betcha.

And we're mere hours away

From the live broadcast of the big chip skylark concert!

Move it, twerp!

It's pay-per-view,

Which means if I don't view,

Then someone's gonna pay!

Are you ok, not chip?

Everybody forgot about my birthday

Because of chip stinking skylark!

Hey, it's not his fault he turned out so delicious! Mmm!

Yeah, well!

You know what I wish?

I wish something bad would happen to him!

Ok, but you just can't wish him maimed.

Ok, then I wish--

Or injured.then--

Or beaten.

Or dead.

Fine! I wish the worst possible non-lethal thing

Would happen to chip skylark right now!

[Crash]

[Doorbell ringing]

Who in their right mind would think of interrupting me

When I'm about to watch teen singing sensation--

[Angelic music]

Chip skylark?!

Aaaaah!

Hi!

[Music plays]

I was just in a non-lethal accident,

In my record company's car.

All of a sudden I hit this tree

Which seemed to pop out of nowhere.

Totally weird.

The album comes out july th. Can I use your phone?

Sure!

Use my special phone.

[Music plays]

Awesome!

Tuesday is apple sauce day.

[Snoring]

Even unconscious, he's delicious! Mmm-mmm-mmm!

Ha! The worst possible thing

That could happen to chip is that he's stuck here

With vicky like me!

[Snoring]

Do you like this one that makes me look like mrs. Chip skylark?

Or this one that makes me look like mrs. Chip skylark?

I really don't think it matters.

I think you'll make a great mrs. Skylark,

Mrs. Skylark.

Aah! I love you, chip skylark!

I'm gonna call all my friends and invite them to the wedding!

First, I gotta find some friends.

[Sigh]

Another day, another wackadoo holding me against my will.

Hi, chip! I'm timmy!

Having a cruddy day like me?

The only cruddy day I ever have

Is a day when I disappoint my fans.

W-w-wait! I didn't disappoint you, did i?

Because of you, your fame and your stupid concert,

Everybody forgot today was my birthday!

Oh, I'm sorry to hear that, little guy.

Reach into my coat pocket.

I've got something that might make it up to you.

Oh, my gosh!

It's the brand-new crash nebula action figure!

Six paces to fun!

Happy birthday, timmy.

This hasn't even been released yet.

How'd you get it?

I got it as a gift from the record company.

Today's my birthday, too.

Really? Yeah.

What a jerk!

Yeah, but they scheduled my concert on my birthday,

So I haven't even had a chance to celebrate it.

Sometimes it's hard to be famous...

And talented.

And delicious!

What?!my dad said that.

[Laughing]

[Coughing]

Sorry. I would've laughed harder,

But these chains are crushing my lungs.

Sorry, chip.

Oh, that's all right, little pal.

It's not like you wished for this to happen.

Wow. I thought chip would be a big jerk

Because he's a big star!

But he's not such a bad guy after all.

I wish chip was free and out of vicky's clutches.

[Splat]

Oh, great. The wand-not-working [splat] noise.

What's wrong?

Well, you know how the rules say

We can't use our magic to destroy true love?

So? Hello, my love.

My truly love with all the love in my heart.

Love! Oh.

You can watch this while I find someone

Who'll perform a marriage ceremony between a crazed fan

And a celebrity teen hostage.

To the internet!

Chet: it's a scene of mass chaos here at the dimsdale dimmadome!

Where everyone is angerly asking the same question--

Where is chip skylark?

If chip doesn't show up,

I'm gonna punish our child for no reason!

Timmy, if you're watching this, run!

Oh, no!

Fans!

Hundreds of 'em!

Disappointed!

My fault! Guilt growing!

Teeth are becoming less shiny!

Hair...

Losing sheen!

Aaaaah!

Oh, man! I've got to get chip to the concert

Before all those women--and my dad-- tear the town apart!

You and I have to get chip out of here.

Cosmo, you got to get to the concert

And stall by any means necessary.

Cool! I'm gonna get my old band back together.

All: we want chip!or else.

We want chip!or else.

We want chip!or else.

Hello, dimsdale!

Are you ready for chip skylark?

[Cheers and applause]

Well, he's not here yet,

Instead, please put your hands together,

For your opening act--

On the flute...pan!

And on drums...santa!

You better watch out.

And on the organ... Beethoven!

What?! What?!

And I'm cosmo!

And together, we're the fairies!

[Booing]

[Sky sighs]

[Toilet flushes]

Feel better?

Yeah, I didn't have to go to the bathroom,

But the sound of flushing calms me down.

I'm sorry you have to spend your birthday with vicky.

Oh, that's ok, little pal.

You have to spend every day with her.

I'm just here until she snaps or the swat team arrives.

That's vicky for ya.

Icky with a v.

Hey! Icky vicky.

I can write a song about that.

♪♪ Icky vicky ♪

♪♪ Icky vicky ♪

♪♪ Icky ♪

♪♪ Vicky ♪

I was totally wrong about you, chip.

Just because you're rich and famous

Doesn't mean you're a jerk!

Actually, I'm not all that rich.

The record company pays for everything.

I'm broke,

But if the fans knew that,

They might not love me anymore.

But neither would vicky.

Well, there's that.

She wouldn't love you anymore.

Hi, chip, darling.

Look who I found on the internet.

The only justice of the peace on earth

Who will marry someone against their will.

When vicky finds out that chip's not rich,

She won't love him anymore.

Timmy: yeah, but how do we let vicky know?

We are gathered here today

To forcibly bond these two teens against their will.

Is there anyone here besides the groom

Who has a reason these two should not be wed?

He does!

Oh, my gosh! It's the guy from the record company!

Thanks for the tip, pinkhead mystery woman.

I represent chip's record company.

Since you're going to be chip skylark's wife,

You get chip skylark's debts.

And this is for the car, this is his cell bill.

This is for the pager and this is for, uh...

Well, everything else.

Million bucks?!

But, chip, I thought you were rich!

Nope. He's just pretty and talented.

Noooo! You broke, loser creep!

I don't love you!

This wedding is off!

Nerd!

[Angelic music]

♪♪ I'm free ♪

♪♪ Yes, sireee ♪

♪♪ I'm freee ♪

Oh, no! I'll never get to the concert in time!

Here you go, chip.

Use this! Let 'em know you're on your way!

Thanks, little dude.

The album comes out on july th.

[Boom]

I wish we were at the concert.

[Crowd boos]

[Speaking german]

Stay back!

Hey, they like us! They really like us!

[Crowd boos]

Ladies...and timmy turner's dad!

Hey, that's me.

Are you ready to rock?

[Cheering]

Then get ready for...

Chip skylark!

[Snoring]

Huh? What?

Dude, how'd we get here so fast?

Uh...the power of music?

Rock on! Hit it!

♪♪ V-i-c-k-y ♪

♪♪ The sound of her name is the little kids' cry ♪♪

Aaaaaah!

♪♪ Hey, vicky, you're so, so icky ♪♪

♪♪ Just the thought of being around you ♪♪

♪♪ Makes me oh, so sicky ♪

♪♪ Hey, vicky, won't you please explain ♪♪

♪♪ Why you get so much enjoyment ♪♪

♪♪ Our of causing kids pain ♪♪

♪♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪

♪♪ A chick who's just plain mean ♪♪

♪♪ A sour sweet ♪

♪♪ She's a fire-breathing dragon ♪♪

♪♪ In a pair of black jeans

All: ooh!

Don't worry about forgetting

That my birthday was today, mom and dad. It's ok.

What? Forgot your birthday?

We'd never forget your birthday, tommy.

Your birthday isn't until tomorrow.

What?

Happy almost birthday, timmy!

All: ooh!

♪♪ Hey, vicky, won't you tell us true ♪♪

♪♪ How'd we ever get the bad luck ♪♪

♪♪ To be stuck with you ♪

♪♪ Oh, vicky, can we say one thing ♪♪

♪♪ It's your super, total yuckiness ♪♪

♪♪ That makes us want to sing ♪♪

♪♪ Icky vicky ♪

♪♪ Ooh, ooh ♪

♪♪ Icky vicky ♪

♪♪ Ooh, ooh ♪

♪♪ Icky vicky ♪

[Cheers and applause]

I hate music.

♪♪ Icky vicky ♪

[Cheering]

[Laughing]

[Screaming]

Houston, we have a problem. Over.

And that's why I'm scared of the big ramp.

So you and your friends pay

To fall on your face at the skateboard park?

Aah!

Someone's coming! Quick!

I wish you guys were my skateboard gear!

Aaah!

His whole face hit at the same time!

He must be really good.

Does your dentist buy you tickets to this place?

Yeah. Why?

Darn it!

All right, you guys, watch and learn.

I like to learn!

Wow! Wow! I've never been this good before!

Well, sweetie,

You've never had magic skate gear before.

Wow! Look at timmy roll nimbly back and forth!

I mean...shred!

Beat that!

That's a little trick I like to call...

Scrunch of the munchkins!

Just because you're the best skater here

Doesn't mean you get to bounce off our heads!

Actually, twerp, it makes me queen of the skate park,

And as queen, I decree...

...to ride this ramp!

That's not fair.

So...what are you gonna do about it?

I challenge you to a skateboarding contest tomorrow!

And whoever wins gets to be the new queen!

King.

Good catch.

Deal. But tomorrow,

When I kick your butt on all three ramps,

You and every other punk under ,

Is banished from the skate park for good!

See ya on the big ramp, squirt!

You're gonna have to skate the big ramp?

Aren't ya scared?

A little, but with you guys helping me,

I've got nothing to worry about.

Both: uh...

Oh, no! Not the group "uh."

That's usually followed by bad news like...

Uh...

According to the rules,

We can't help you win a contest, timmy,

That'd be cheating.

We can help you show off,

But for fun, not profit.

I'd never have challenged vicky if I'd had known that.

All the kids are counting on me!

I still have a shot though, right?

Actually, you're pretty uncoordinated.

I am not! Uhh!

I'm doomed!

What you need is some death-defying trick all your own!

Timmy, what you need

Is some death-defying trick all your own!

You need this.

It combines a degree turn

With four aerial flips.

I call it the degree

In four aerial flippy trick.

Yeah, that rolls off the tongue, poindexter.

What about calling it the timmy tuck?

[Crash]

Oh, darn it!

Call it impossible! I can't do this!

Vicky: but I can!

I can't wait to totally steal that trick

And make it mine!

[Maniacal laugh]

It's good to be queen.

[Screaming]

He's not very good, is he?

Nope, but this garbage rocks!

[Screams]

Sorry.

I'll never get good enough in time to do that trick.

I know you guys can't help me cheat,

But can't you train me?

You know, take me someplace

Where I can get real good real fast?

Whoo-hoo!

Zero gravity is perfect for practicing spins!

Houston, we have another problem, over.

It's always problem, problem, problem with you guys.

Don't you ever call just to say hi? Over.

Skating in the jungle is a great way to learn how to swerve.

Learn to skate in difficult environments, you must,

Because scared of gorillas am i!

Ramping down a pyramid is a great way

To learn how to pick up speed!

Aaaaah!

Heavens! This specimen is perfectly preserved.

Am i? I'm still using this.

Uh! The mummy's cursed!

Oh, man! I'm still beefing it

On the simplest of tricks!

Don't worry, timmy!

When or lose, your friends will still love you!

Really?

Timmy better win or we're not gonna love him anymore.

Welcome to the skate park

At the big skateboarding contest!

Today's the big match between evil -year-old

Baby-sitter, skate punk vicky...

[Crickets chirping]

And timmy!

[Cheers and applause]

Wait! Where is timmy?

[Cheers and applause abruptly stops]

Ha ha! I knew it!

I knew he'd punk out.

I win by default.

And you know what that means!

Where could he be?

Oh, man. If I go down there,

I'm gonna lose and have to go on the big ramp.

There's no way I'm gonna humiliate myself. No way.

All right, twerps! Line up!

Say bye-bye!

Not so fast, vicky!

You wanna win, you're gonna have to do it the old-fashioned way!

By being better than me!

Both: it's timmy!

[Cheers and applause]

Good luck, timmy.

Thanks, guys.

I'll do my best.

Yeah, just remember,

It's not whether you win or lose,

It's win or we don't ever get to come back here again.

[Gulp]

[Dong]

Break a leg, twerp!

Thanks, vicky.

No, really. I mean break a leg!

[Cheers and applause]

Yeah, well, watch this!

[Laughter]

And timmy actually wins the first round.

[Dong]

[Cheers and applause]

Ha! Beat that, twerp!

And vicky... Unfortunately...wins.

[Dong]

It all comes down to this!

The super, colossal, gigantic,

Freakishly large,

Ramp of death!

Don't worry, timmy.

Just do the timmy tuck, and you'll be the new queen.

King! Whatever.

I, vicky,

Am about to do the totally original,

And completely mine, trick,

The vicky tuck!

What?! What?!

She stole your trick!

Oh, this calls for some dramatic background music.

[Somber music plays]

Aaaaah!

Now all timmy has to do is survive the big ramp

And he wins!

Oh, no. The big ramp!

I can't do it! I won't!

Timmy! Timmy!

Timmy! Timmy!

Timmy!

All right! All right!

Well, it's been nice knowing me.

Skating on the moon,

Ramping down the pyramids,

Skating in the jungle,

I can do this! I can do this!

He can do this! He can do this!

Unless!

[Boom boom boom]

Oh, no! I'm doomed!

She's totally cheating.

I mean...cheating.

Not if I can help it.

And now for some zero-gravity spins!

Look at him go!

A degree spin with one flip...

Two...

Three! And--

What's after three?

Four!

Right!

And that's why it's called the timmy tuck!

[Cheers and applause]

No way, twerp!

How can you do that when I couldn't?

Because timmy's small and nice.

You're tall and weighted down with too much evil,

Which threw you off balance.

Ha ha! Well, that's super.

You'll be going now!

Oh, no! I won!

I'm the queen now!

King. Right!

Gimme that crown!

Oh, you want this crown?

You've got a better chance

If some loser -year-old wasteoid

Falling from the sky

And plowing me into the ground!

Aaaaaah!

Here you go.

[Cheers and applause]

Thank you, thank you!

And as the new queen of the skate park,

I decree...

Let my people skate!

[Cheers and applause]

Timmy won! Vicky's in a crater,

And the kids are free to skate!

Pretty good day, don't you think?

I wanna a hot dog. Is it half-time yet?

You did it, dude!

You beat--i mean...

Thrashed vicky and saved the park!

And best of all, I did it all by myself--me!

The most coordinated skater ever!

Uh!

And best of all, timmy learned some great new tricks!

Aaaah!

Uh! And one not-so-great...one.