03x02 - Shiny Teeth/Odd, Odd West

[bunniefuu]

♪♪ Timmy is an average kid ♪

♪♪ That no one understands ♪

♪♪ Mom and dad and vicky ♪

♪♪ Always giving him commands ♪

Bed, twerp!

♪♪ Doom and gloom up in his room ♪♪

♪♪ Is broken instantly ♪

♪♪ By his magic little fish who'll grant his every wish ♪♪

♪♪ 'Cause in reality... ♪

♪♪ They are his oddparents, fairly oddparents ♪♪

Wands and wings.floaty, crowny things.

♪♪ Oddparents, fairly oddparents ♪♪

♪♪ Really mod, peapod, buff bod, hot rod ♪♪

Obtuse, rubber goose,

Green moose, guava juice.

Giant snake, birthday cake,

Large fries, chocolate shake!

♪♪ Oddparents, fairly oddparents ♪♪

♪♪ It flips your lid when you are a kid ♪♪

♪♪ With fairly oddparents ♪

Yeah, right.

You're watching...

All the excitement of teeth, hours a day.

Howdy hey! This is brad cuspidor

With teen singing s chip skylark.

Here to talk about his awesome new hit song,

My shiny teeth and me.

I'd be nothing without my teeth,

Which is why I dedicated a whole song to them.

Yo, yo, yo! But aren't you worried about

Up and coming teen singing sensation skip sparkypants?

He's been living in your shadow for, like, ever.

His pants may be sparky but his teeth are weak.

I heard that, yo.

Yo, you wanna take that outside, yo?

After you.

I should have warned him. I'm a master of teeth fu.

Wow, skip sparkypants sure is dissing chip skylark.

Word!

Chip rocks!

Two words!

Why is everybody getting their teeth cleaned today?

Because everyone wants to be in chip skylark's video

For his new song...

And only the kids with the shiniest teeth

Get to be in the video with him.

Who's next?

Well, hello, timmy "please rip my teeth out by the roots" turner.

I don't want my teeth yanked out.

T to be coy.

I'll be glad to rip your teeth out.

And here to help me is my son wendall,

And his yanko-ripomatic.

It yanksandrips.

And now I'm going to get medieval on your mouth.

You don't want my teeth. They're not perfect!

Ooh! Celebrity teeth I could yank and/or rip out.

You're all done.

Come on, wendall.

It's time to meet mr. Chip skylark.

And rip his teeth out?

That's my boy!

Good night, teeth, who gleam like the morning sun.

I sure would be devastated

If anything happened to you guys.

Tv: chip skylark's teeth are missing!

Late last night, chip skylark's teeth

Were stolen right out of his musical mouth!

Bender! He must have gotten medieval on chip's mouth!

That's wiggity- wiggity-whack.whattedy-whattedy what?

I'm chet ubetcha with toothless singing sensation chip skylark...

And some guy from the record company.

Sir, with chip skylark's teeth missing,

Will you be replacing him in the video?

Of course not. This is chip skylark's song.

It's his vision, and nobody,

I repeat, nobody, could do it better than chip skylark.

We're willing to wait until chip gets his teeth back.

But you've already spent $ million on the video.

I'll do it for free.

Meet the new chip skylark!

[Mumbling incoherently]

What?! There's a boy trapped in a well?!

This is chet ubetcha saying

I'm getting that boy out of the well!

Oh, no! Gotta h

Cosmo, wanda. I wish chip's teeth were back in his m

According to the rules, teeth retrieval falls under

The jurisdiction of the tooth fairy. We're powerless!

Then there's only one choice.

We've gotta get the tooth fairy to help us.

I'm sorry. I can't help you.

But why?

It's just... I'm very busy and--

[Ringing]

I'll be right back.

-Year-old. Jelly beans.

Gets them every time.

I can't just go and get teeth all willy-nilly.

There are very specific and intricate supernatural laws

That must be adhered to.

Like what?

Well...they gotta be under a pillow.

But it's not just any teeth that were stolen.

They were chip skylark's.

Chip skylark! That changes everything!

His teeth are my finest work.

Who knows what evil someone could do with those teeth.

Then you'll help us?which is words.

Yes!

Too busy. Up to you.

I bequeath to you my most powerful tooth-based weaponry.

These toothpaste bracelets,

This magic floss of truth,

This giant electric toothbrush,

And these amazing, indestructible braces.

What's the tiara for?

It hides your secret identity,

And it matches.

It's up to you, timmy turner.

Save chip skylark's teeth,

Or I'll rot yours from

Oh, m filming the video in an hour.

It's u chip's teeth back.

You two stall that video by any means necessary.

Let's get dental.

Minutes, second rate teen singing sensation skip sparkypants.

Word! Now it's my chance to show that sparky pants

Beat shiny teeth any day, word.

[Barking]

Yo! Get back with my sparky pants, yo!

Gaze upon them, w

The greatest teeth in the universe

And they're all mine! Ah ha ha ha!

Teeth that perfect belong to the world, dr. Bender.

Who's that, pop?

I can't tell. The goofy teeth seem familiar

But the tiara has me baffled.

But w

You'll never get these teeth!

Yahh!

You can't fight my floss lasso.

It'll make you tell the truth.

Now. Does chewing gum after meals

Actually help cut down

The jury is out. Some dentists believe that,

But we're not entirely sure.

I gotta get out of here.

Ha! You're trapped, and as soon as I remove that t

I'm going to figure out your identity.

And yank and/or rip your teeth out.

Can't let bender get these teeth.

A pillow. Right!

There's no escaping me,

Buck-toothed tooth fiend superhero. I--

Just a quarter?!

No-o-o-o-o-o-o!

Well, skip's sparky pantsless and chip's shiny toothless.

We're going to have to cancel the big v

$ Million!

You! You're the next chip skylark!

Oh, goody!

Not so fast.

Who's that?

[Mumbling incoherently]

Chip, I believe these are yours.

Now come on. You've got a video to sh**t.

Thanks timmy. You're the best.

Word. Don't say that.

Come on, everybody. Let's film a video... About t

Action, baby.

♪♪ When I'm feeling lonely ♪

♪♪ Sad as I can be ♪

♪♪ All by myself on an uncharted island ♪♪

♪♪ In an endless sea ♪

♪♪ What makes me happy ♪

♪♪ Fills me up with glee ♪

♪♪ Those bones in my jaw that don't have a flaw ♪♪

♪♪ My shiny teeth and me ♪

♪♪ My shiny teeth that twinkle just like the stars in space ♪♪

♪♪ My shiny teeth that sparkle

♪♪ Add beauty to my face ♪

♪♪ My shiny teeth that glisten

♪♪ Just like the christmas tree

♪♪ You know they'll walk a mile just to see me smile ♪♪

♪♪ My shiny teeth and me ♪

♪♪ Shiny teeth, shiny teeth ♪♪

♪♪ Yes, they're all so perfect

♪♪ So white and pearly ♪

♪♪ Brush, gargle, rinse, a couple fresh mints ♪♪

♪♪ My shiny teeth and me ♪

♪♪ My shiny teeth so awesome, just like a favorite song ♪♪

♪♪ My shiny teeth I floss 'em so they grow to be real strong ♪

♪♪ Shiny teeth, I love them ♪

♪♪ And they all love me ♪

♪♪ Why should I talk to you when I got ♪♪

♪♪ Shiny teeth in me ♪

♪♪ Shiny teeth, shiny teeth ♪♪

♪♪ Shiny teeth in me ♪

♪♪ Shiny teeth, shiny teeth ♪♪

♪♪ My shiny teeth that twinkle just like the stars in space ♪♪

♪♪ My shiny teeth that sparkle

♪♪ Add beauty to my face ♪

♪♪ My shiny teeth that glisten

♪♪ Just like the christmas tree

♪♪ You know they'll walk a mile just to see me smile ♪♪

♪♪ My shiny teeth and me ♪

♪♪ Shiny teeth, shiny teeth ♪♪

♪♪ My shiny teeth and me ♪

♪♪ Shiny teeth, shiny teeth ♪♪

♪♪ My shiny teeth and me ♪

♪♪ Shiny teeth, shiny teeth ♪♪

[Mumbling incoherently]

You said a mouthful.

[Whinnying]

Dad, should you whinny while you drive?

Nope. And I probably shouldn't have replaced

The steering wheel with horse reins, either.

But safety's for yellow bellies.

Yee-ha! Giddy up.

Your dad sure is excited about

Taking you on this s field trip.

He's dragging us to the place he went

When he was a

[Wanda and cosmo reading]

This is gonna be great!

Just me and my son...

And all those other kids.

Dad: we're here!

Whoa, trusty steed.

Ooh, the birthplace of dimmsdale. Dimmsdale flats.

Abandoned and empty, just like my childhood!

This street right here was home to

Each and every one of your forefathers.

I have fathers? I thought I was lucky to have one!

This is the greatest day of my life! Whoo-hoo!

And this is the legendary masked stranger.

Dimmsdale's handsome and mysterious lone ranger of justice.

Wow. This is even more boring than I thought it would be.

Maybe we'll get our "bored to death" badge.

This place stinks! If I owned this place,

I'd have torn it down and replaced it with a mini mall by now.

Don't say that! They'd never tear down

My most cherished childhood memory!

Then how do you explain that line of bulldozers

From the tearing down your most cherished childhood memories construction company?

No-o-o-o-ho-ho-ho-ho!

[Tweet!]

Our scoutmaster has fallen.

S

Is that how the manual said to treat emotional pain?

Ah, nobody reads the manual.

Howdy, pardners.

All: doug dimmadome!

[Mumbling]

That's right. Doug dimmadome.

Billionaire, real estate tycoon,

And destroyer of cherished childhood dreams--like yours.

What are you doing here?

Everybody knows the deed to dimmsdale flats

Was lost years ago.

That means this land is up for grabs.

And I'm gonna grab it, tear it to pieces,

And build me the world's largest mini mall!

A maxi-mini mall?

A maxi-mini mall.

All: yay!

Not yay.not yay? Not yay?

Not yay. My dad, your scoutmaster, loves this place.

And according to the scouts manual,

A s always stands up for his scoutmaster.

Is that in the manual?

Did you read the manual?

Nobody reads the manual.

Then it's in the manual.

We're gonna stand up for our rights.

Well, I've got a great place for you to stand.

You're throwing us in jail?

Aw, don't think of it as jail.

Think of it as a rustic day care center,

With big iron bars.

Adios. I got me some childhood memories to destroy.

Like yours.

[Coyote howls]

Chester: hey, why does this jail cell have a coyote-shaped dog door?

Sanjay: because fate is cruel?

[Roaring and screaming]

It's ok, dad. We'll figure out a way

To save this place and your childhood memories.

[Sobbing loudly]

You have a plan?

Yeah. But it's pretty complicated.

I wish I had the lost deed.

Timmy, we don't know where the deed is.

We're fairies, not psychics.

I can't even read my own mind.

Nope. Nothing.

Can you make me a fake deed?

Sorry, timmy. According to the rules,

That'd be falsifying documents.

What are they gonna do? Throw him in jail?

Oh, great. You read your manual,

I'll find the lost deed myself.

I wish we were back in dimmsdale flats years ago.

[Horse whinnies]

Cool! I mean, tarnation. We're in the old west.

I mean the current west.

And look. It's chester and aj's ancestors.

What in the name of hootenanny do you call this contraption?

It's an amazing device of my own invention

That's gonna revolutionize the way you all l

It's called a home computer. Giddyap.

It'll do your homework,

Keep track of your stock portfolio,

And make your lives easier.

How does one operate this device, partner?

All you have to do is read the manual.

A manual? Reading's for yellow bellies.

Let's go over t and not read, like real men.

Woman: and stay out!

That voice. It can't be.

[Gasping]

Head for the hills! It's vicky the kid!

Wow. Even in the old west

She's a heartless, evil witch.

Hey! You can't just boss us around like that.

I reckon I can.

Because I'm a-baby-sittin' all you varmints,

And since this here is a dirt poor town,

Your parents had to pay me with this.

It's the deed to dimmsdale flats.

Somebody should do something.

If only there were some sort of

Pink-hatted symbol of justice

To bring some justice back

Into this lawless, justice-less town.

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

That pink and justice don't really go together?

Well, that, too, but I wish...

Ah, it's good to be the lawlessness.

Vicky the kid? I'm callin' you out!

Who's the dead twerp that said that?

I did.

The masked stranger.

And I am his trusty native american sidekick,

Dances with wands.

And I'd like to give a big western welcome to my trusty steed---

[Whistles]

Cos...mo.

You're supposed to be his trusty steed.

Steed? I thought he said "steer".

Still nothin'.

The deed to dimmsdale flats don't belong to you.

And you're gonna give it back.

... ...draw!

Ha! Paper covers rock!

Best two out of three.

Go for it.

... --

Ow!

Scissors cuts paper.

... ...draw!

Ha! Rock beats scissors. I win!

Yee-haw! Yee-haw!

What are you western twerps yee-hawing about?

I still got the deed.

[Whistles]

Thank you, I reckon.

I'll be back... I reckon!

[Whinnying]

Good-bye, masked stranger.

We will never forget you!

Rememberin's for yellow bellies.

So, masked stranger,

Are you sure the deed's in a safe place?

Yep. I hid it somewhere that none of

These illiterate boobs would even think to look.

All right. Let's get ready to tear down

This forgotten, old deed-free town.

Tear it down?

Down to the ground.

Not while I'm around.

The masked stranger?!

It's the guys! They escaped!

Way to go, chester. Your braces made a great pick axe

To help us tunnel out of that cell.

And your body made a most marvelous shield

To keep the coyote away from us.

I'll take my "eaten by coyotes" badge now.

Well, that's all fine and dandy, son,

But unless you somehow magically obtained that deed

This land is mine.

Actually, it's mine.

Because I found the deed in the one place

Nobody in the old west would ever look.

It's in an old computer manual?

Dagnabbit. Nobody ever reads the manual.

The deed is mine,

And I'm gonna give it to the one man

I know will take care of this place

The way it deserves to be taken care of--my dad.

Aw, thanks, partner. You've given me the town that represents

Everything that was good and wonderful about my childhood.

I'll give you bucks for it. Sold!

What?!

Being eaten by coyotes and locked in a jail

Made me realize my childhood stunk.

Start 'em up, boys. This town's going down.

Why so glum, partner?

I thought I'd be a hero if I saved the town for you.

You are a hero, timmy.

You've made me bucks richer. So here.

A sheriff badge?

I crossed off the word "sheriff" and wrote new words.

It's your "I made my dad richer" badge.

Thanks, partner.

But I keep thinking that maybe,

Just maybe, we forgot something.

And now you're gonna get your "beaten by a chester" badge.

Bring it on, wiley!

Wait'll my four fathers hear about this!